Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

Ron DeSantis, the grand wizard, oops, governor of FL.

Nancy smash is sick of your bullshit.

Balloon Juice has never been a refuge for the linguistically delicate.

The words do not have to be perfect.

If West Virginia and San Francisco had a love child.

It’s not hopeless, and we’re not helpless.

Cole, when it comes to calico cats, restraint is overrated.

When the time comes to make an endorsement, the pain of NYT editors will be palpable as they reluctantly whisper “Biden.”

JFC, are there no editors left at that goddamn rag?

Every reporter and pundit should have to declare if they ever vacationed with a billionaire.

The revolution will be supervised.

Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in morse code.

They love authoritarianism, but only when they get to be the authoritarians.

It’s a new day. Light all those Biden polls of young people on fire and throw away the ashes.

I conferred with the team and they all agree – still not tired of winning!

If marriage is the equivalent of selling yourself into slavery, women with self respect should reject the offer.

Washington Post’s Catch and Kill, not noticeably better than the Enquirer’s.

You come for women, you’re gonna get your ass kicked.

If you are still in the gop, you are either an extremist yourself, or in bed with those who are.

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

If you are in line to indict donald trump, stay in line.

Russian mouthpiece, go fuck yourself.

Dead end MAGA boomers crying about Talyor Swift being a Dem is my kind of music. Turn it up.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Excellent Links / Thursday Evening Open Thread: Trolling for Fake Internet Girlfriends

Thursday Evening Open Thread: Trolling for Fake Internet Girlfriends

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Somebody had to go there. Josh Gondelman, for NYMag, explains how he “Bought Three Fake Girlfriends on the Internet“:

… The modern ease of catfishing has had the tangential effect of growing a cottage industry of websites offering the services of fake Internet girlfriends. Make an existing girlfriend jealous, they urge. Get your nagging family off your back. None market directly to those garnering sympathy during a Heisman campaign, nor to what I imagine must be a lucrative contingent of deeply closeted gay men. Almost all the sites guarantee discretion — and contain a disclaimer that you WILL NOT meet your fake online girlfriend for in-person sex stuff, no matter how nicely you ask.

To better understand the plight of Manti Te’o, I decided to blow some money on an imaginary paramour. Fake Internet relationships, it turns out, are a buyer’s market…

Bonus marketing points to the site that promises “For an additional hundred clams, your F.I.G. can join your World of Warcraft or Everquest II campaign”!

Apart from surreptitously checking all your guild buddies’ chats for “tells”, what’s on the agenda for the evening?

Reader Interactions

123Comments

  1. 1.

    dr. bloor

    “For an additional hundred clams, your F.I.G. can join your World of Warcraft or Everquest II campaign”!

    So I guess it’s time for us to stop laughing at the Japanese guys marrying their dolls?

  4. 4.

    SteveinSC

    Harry Reid must have been in the submarine service since his motto is “Dive, dive dive.” Oh right, he was a boxer, taking a dive. What a fucking pansy!

  5. 5.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    You don’t have to spend any money to get a fake online girlfriend. Hell, I got a half dozen right here on Balloon Juice.

  10. 10.

    David in NY

    I liked especially:

    You actually had to go out there in the world and give yourself a hickey with a vacuum cleaner.

  11. 11.

    ? Martin

    That’s a hilarious article.

    I should get my daughter into the fake girlfriend business to pay for college (I previously offered to let them grow pot in the garden if CA legalized pot, but that initiative failed). She’d be bad at it, but apparently that’s par for the course.

  13. 13.

    johnny aquitard

    @Zifnab25: The amused perv in me sometimes wonders about the logistics of such an enterprise. Do they have a factory that produces used panties, with a conveyor belt running down the middle loaded with new panties, and where dozens of women at stations along its length pull one off, put it on, do a few exercises, then pull it off and then throw it into a bin destined for the packaging and shipping dept.?

    Or is it a cottage industry, piecework, in other words.

    Perhaps it’s a sideline for the Underpants Gnomes. Which means we now know what step 2 is:

    1. Steal (womens’) underwear
    2. Sell to Japanese men
    3. PROFIT!

    And what about quality control? Gives a whole new meaning to spot checking.

  14. 14.

    Yutsano

    Open thread? Open thread.

    I just gave the most gut wrenching presentation of my life. I messed up a key point but we’ll see how bad it hurts me. Oh well, it’s DONE.

  16. 16.

    Roger Moore

    nor to what I imagine must be a lucrative contingent of deeply closeted gay men.

    Isn’t that what the “Get your nagging family off your back.” line is about?

  21. 21.

    SteveinSC

    @Punchy: And I don’t know what caused the BJ Exquisite Prigs to come out and play the stupid? Oh, right it’s not an act.

  22. 22.

    SatanicPanic

    What’s with the gun owner fetish for posting fake quotes? On the internet, where a quick google search almost always leads to Snopes. It’s ridiculous.

  23. 23.

    Yutsano

    @Raven: I did about 90% of it right. But I did fuck up a huge point. I think that because I understood what exactly I messed up on that it might still work out in my favour. Oh well. I find out the actual results tomorrow. I’m just glad it’s done.

  25. 25.

    SteveinSC

    @Raven:

    …that he probably didn’t have enough votes to get through.

    Oh that’s right you are Raven the all-knowing bird, able to devine facts not available to anyone but Exquisite Prigs. Moron.

  26. 26.

    ? Martin

    @Raven: I’m pretty sure he did have the votes, but it would have carried a larger cost.

    The filibuster is as much an agreement between the majority and minority leaders as anything else. If Reid can get McConnell to agree to cut way back on the filibusters in lieu of making that change permanent, then the outcome is the same, and the filibuster is preserved for the future. Everyone comes out feeling like a winner.

  28. 28.

    Roger Moore

    @johnny aquitard:

    The amused perv in me sometimes wonders about the logistics of such an enterprise.

    I think your suggestion that it’s a cottage industry is probably correct. I can’t imagine that the market is that big, so you don’t need a massive assembly line. Assuming that they’re authentically worn and not just sprayed with fake schoolgirl scent, I’d think the easiest approach would be to recruit girls who like the idea of wearing brand new panties every day and aren’t too weirded out by perverts sniffing them. You could probably get some of them to do it for the wardrobe benefit alone.

  30. 30.

    smedley the uncertain

    iseem to recall several dems defected, including carl levin. so no he didn’t have the votes
    o

  32. 32.

    SatanicPanic

    @johnny aquitard: There’s only a handful of these machines in a dark corner of Kabuki-cho, and a lot nastier things than that go on there. I’m sure the vending machine owner just visits the local whorehouses/strip clubs, etc.

  33. 33.

    Comrade Colette Collaboratrice

    Bonus marketing points to the site that promises “For an additional hundred clams, your F.I.G. can join your World of Warcraft or Everquest II campaign”!

    John Cole’s Ladyfriend exposed!

  34. 34.

    trollhattan

    Hope you’re sitting in a safe chair when reading this.

    A secretive funding organisation in the United States that guarantees anonymity for its billionaire donors has emerged as a major operator in the climate “counter movement” to undermine the science of global warming, The Independent has learnt.

    The Donors Trust, along with its sister group Donors Capital Fund, based in Alexandria, Virginia, is funnelling millions of dollars into the effort to cast doubt on climate change without revealing the identities of its wealthy backers or that they have links to the fossil fuel industry.

    However, an audit trail reveals that Donors is being indirectly supported by the American billionaire Charles Koch who, with his brother David, jointly owns a majority stake in Koch Industries, a large oil, gas and chemicals conglomerate based in Kansas.

    Millions of dollars has been paid to Donors through a third-party organisation, called the Knowledge and Progress Fund, with is operated by the Koch family but does not advertise its Koch connections.

    Some commentators believe that such convoluted arrangements are becoming increasingly common to shield the identity and backgrounds of the wealthy supporters of climate scepticism – some of whom have vested interests in the fossil-fuel industry

    Shocking, right? These fuckers will have us all roast/drown/starve just to raise their quarterly margins.

    http://www.independent.co.uk/environment/climate-change/exclusive-billionaires-secretly-fund-attacks-on-climate-science-8466312.html

  36. 36.

    Raven

    “Senate Democratic Whip Dick Durbin (Ill.), a leading liberal, said Wednesday Democrats do not have enough votes to implement the talking-filibuster reform.

    He said Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) has suggested a package of more modest reforms to Senate Republican Leader Mitch McConnell (Ky.). They include proposals to eliminate filibusters on motions to proceed to new business and to speed the process for sending legislation to conference negotiations with the House.

    Read more: http://thehill.com/homenews/senate/278815-sen-durbin-democrats-lack-votes-to-pass-talking-filibuster-reform#ixzz2IwD9CY9J
    Follow us: @thehill on Twitter | TheHill on Facebook

  37. 37.

    Roger Moore

    @PeakVT:
    I had honestly never given it much thought until I saw your post. That’s pretty much off the top of my head, which I’ll admit may be just as scary as the idea that I had already put great thought into the topic.

  38. 38.

    Chyron HR

    @SteveinSC:

    Can’t win on the facts, win on the invective.

    Oh, is that why you keep screaming “Exquisite Prigs” over and over again? I thought you were trying to come up with your own SNL-style catchprase.

  39. 39.

    Raven

    @SteveinSC: Yea, calling me a moron wasn’t and invective was it? What the fuck is your problem? You don’t think I was right, fine. Don’t jump on me and expect me to roll over.

  40. 40.

    FlipYrWhig

    @Raven: the “talking filibuster” thing wasn’t going to be something that benefited Democrats or liberals anyway. What does a jerkwad like Rand Paul or Mike Lee want more than attention for some stupid pet cause? I liked the proposal about needing to have 41 senators present to keep a filibuster going. But senators like having quirky, hard-to-justify powers, and most of them plan to be around a while, so I’m not too surprised that the status quo remained largely intact.

  42. 42.

    Original Lee

    I think this reeks. Is there a good reason for CMS to decide that ordinary folk don’t need to see investigative reports any more? (Other than CYA for conflict of interest, I mean.)

    I think this just gives the anti-Obamacare folk more ammunition for the whole Big Secret Government Takeover thing. Here’s a petition to reverse the CMS decision. Due to new rules, there needs to be 150 signatures before the petition shows up on the website, and 100,000 signatures for a White House response. Please go sign!

  46. 46.

    Raven

    Ha, Rev Al is playing Taj Mahal’s Fishin song with Aqua Buddha’s picture up.

    Betcha’ goin’ fishin’ all o’ da’ time
    Baby goin’ fishin’ too.
    Bet yo’ life, Yo’ sweet wife
    Catch mo’ fish than you.

    Many fish bites if ya’ got good bait,
    Here’s a little tip that I would like to relate.
    Many fish bites if ya’ got good bait.
    I’m a goin fishin’, Yes I’m goin’ fishin,
    And my baby goin’ fishin’ too.

  48. 48.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @FlipYrWhig: Yup., LGM

    On a private call with the Bay Area Democrats on Wednesday, Merkley identified Reid as the key person in the talks, and he urged activists to target members of Reid’s leadership team ahead of their meetings next week, according to people on the call. He also characterized Democratic Sens. Max Baucus (Mont.), Patrick Leahy (Vt.), Dianne Feinstein (Calif.), Barbara Boxer (Calif.), Joe Manchin (West. Va.) and Mark Pryor (Ark.) as wrestling with his proposal, sources say.

    At least Boxer and Leahy are a surprise. Feinstein (Tweety’s idea of “What a Senator Should Be!”) and Baucus were all but sure things. Pryor and Manchin. Ugh. And I suspect there are a few more (Landrieu, Johnson, Warner, Nelson) who are just as happy to keep their heads down and let others do the dirty work.

  49. 49.

    burnspbesq

    @Raven:

    That’s odd. I don’t think any of my comments in any thread today have included “@raven.”

    Trust me, when I’m interested in your feeble attempts at humor, I’ll be sure to let you know.

  51. 51.

    JPL

    @eemom: Last week I called Reid’s office and the person mentioned that he wanted to reform the rule. haha.. The clerk also said he wanted to work with McConnell and I said well how’d that work out for him last time.. Obviously phone calls don’t work.

  52. 52.

    Steeplejack

    I am compelled to admit that the housecat is a fake Internet cat. I apologize if anyone was hurt by this.

  54. 54.

    Emma

    @SteveinSC: A democratic senator said yesterday they didn’t have enough votes. Don’t ask me who, but someone mentioned it in one of the threads.

  57. 57.

    Emma

    @Raven: Oopsie?

    I think sometimes we forget Teresa Nielsen Hayden’s wonderful “just because we’re on their side it doesn’t mean they’re on our side.” Senators love their little power games, and they would rather keep playing them.

  59. 59.

    Ecks

    @Roger Moore:

    Isn’t that what the “Get your nagging family off your back.” line is about?

    Well, gay people, but also there is a mathematical function which describes how the older you get, the less time you are allowed to spend single before blunt family members start asking nagging questions about when are you going to settle down already.
    Once you have a sig other for a while, that question is replaced with one about having kids.

    @? Martin: Oh, well if McConnell PROMISED then we’re alright. You set my mind at ease.

  62. 62.

    PeakVT

    @Raven: Agreed. How dare anyone suggest that at least 5 of the 55 Dems are either misguided fools or power-hungry jerks? The only possible answer is that Reid is 100% to blame.

  64. 64.

    Emma

    @Raven: So it was. Still, there are days when I wish the Democratic coalition didn’t have to be so damn all-inclusive. I could do with a few less Blue Dogs. Still, in the long term it’s better than what the Republicans are doing to themselves!

  66. 66.

    Herbal Infusion Bagger

    Shocking, right? These fuckers will have us all roast/drown/starve just to raise their quarterly margins

    The funny thing is, that Koch (as well as being an oil and gas giant), also are huge in chemical processing.

    Now, one of (several) needed solutions to reduce CO2 emissions is carbon capture and sequestration. Which, among other things, means sticking a big honkin’ chemical plant next to your power plant to capture the CO2.
    Koch make components (absorber column packing) that (for various technical reasons) is by far the best for a plant doing CO2 capture. And you need millions of dollars of said component for each CO2 capture plant.

    So at least some of Koch’s businesses would benefit if there was serious legislation on curbing climate change.

  67. 67.

    Comrade Mary

    @Yutsano: Ah, well, honey, I’ve done my share of those. As awful as it feels afterward, I have also had to recognize that I generally don’t diminish my opinion of an otherwise capable person who makes a mistake, so practically every capable person I respect probably looks at me the same way.

    Charlie Pierce on all this:

    I never had much faith that the Senate was going to go the full monty on reforming itself. (And I wasn’t entirely sure I wanted it to do so since, had Republican primary voters in Nevada, Delaware, Indiana, and Missouri not lost what passes for their minds in the last two election cycles, I suspect I would not enjoy what came out of an untrammelled Republican senatorial majority very much.) There something basic to all political transactions that it’s a very hard pull to get people to vote their own powers out of existence. (We only have the system we have now because Bob LaFollette and his friends delayed the entry of the United States into a world war.) So, when all the agitating about the filibuster began, I wasn’t at all convinced that any major changes in that maddening practice would be forthcoming.

    The deal Harry Reid cut today with Mitch McConnell is going to make people crazy, but I never read anything that indicated that Reid had enough votes for the kind of sweeping changes for which the more progressive members of his caucus were pushing. (There are as many people in Reid’s caucus — including, I suspect, Reid himself — whose primary loyalty is to the institution as there are on the other side. To name just a couple, neither Charles Schumer nor Dianne Feinstein are exactly boat rockers.) Personally, I wanted the talking filibuster, not just for the pure theater of it, but because it is a mechanism for transparency and honesty. Absent that, I’m no more satisfied than I am surprised. I think Reid got the best deal he could, and I think he got it within the parameters of what he thought was acceptable, and he did get actual changes in the rules, and not some good-old-boy transaction that the Republicans can ignore the first chance they get. That’s progress, anyway. You want more? Elect different senators.

    (I’ve quoted the whole thing: it’s that short.)

  69. 69.

    gelfling545

    @? Martin: And really, who in their right mind would want to listen to the current crop of Republicans blathering for hours in a “talking filibuster”?

  71. 71.

    Herbal Infusion Bagger

    @Ecks:

    Well, gay people, but also there is a mathematical function which describes how the older you get, the less time you are allowed to spend single before blunt family members start asking nagging questions about when are you going to settle down already.

    It seems that’s more of an issue for women than men. Everyone seems to think its OK to ask a single women in her twenties how her romantic life is going and offer their advice on how to conduct her love life. [About the mid-thirties it stops, because people are afraid of said single women bursting into tears at the comtemplation of a life as a spinster.]

    Strangely, asking a middle-aged guy how his love life is going and if he’s still able to keep it up during coitus is not so socially acceptable.

  72. 72.

    Roger Moore

    @Ecks:

    Well, gay people, but also there is a mathematical function which describes how the older you get, the less time you are allowed to spend single before blunt family members start asking nagging questions about when are you going to settle down already.

    Not in my family. Or maybe they’ve just given up on me.

  73. 73.

    Herbal Infusion Bagger

    @PeakVT:

    @Herbal Infusion Bagger: True, but making money that way is hard work. It’s much easier to dig up a scarce commodity.

    That’s true. The money in oil is always on the exploration/production side, while the refineries make a nickel or a dime per gallon.

  74. 74.

    hoodie

    I can see reasons why DiFi and Boxer might not want to blow up the filibuster. They represent California, which has over 35 million residents and depends on Colorado River water and out of state generated electricity. It used to be more culturally aligned with intermountain western states, but has diverged from many of them in the last couple of decades to the point it is true blue and has more in common with Massachusetts than Idaho. What if some gaggle of intermountain West red state senators decide they want to fuck with that arrangement, with help from their California-hating southern friends, and they figure out a way to get others to sit on the sidelines? John McCain, for example, was making noise a few years back about renegotiating the Colorado River Compact to make it more favorable to Arizona. There are probably some interests in the east that would be ok with that because they think it would be more equitable. Without getting into the particular virtues or defects of such arguments, it’s still understandable that DiFi and Boxer may feel they need to retain the filibuster to protect the interests of their constituents, not just their party. That’s probably the case for many of the other reluctant parties. It may not just be ego.

  75. 75.

    Seanly

    @trollhattan:

    I love the idea that money outweighs science. Reality has a way of crashing through even the most secure delusions. Too bad the rest of us will drown or die from heat exhaustion & the planet will be f’ed up for a long time.

  77. 77.

    gogol's wife

    Since it’s an Open Thread, there’s this news, from Sen. Murphy:

    “That’s why today, I joined my colleagues, Senators Dianne Feinstein, Chuck Schumer, and Richard Blumenthal, and Representatives Carolyn McCarthy, Ed Perlmutter, and Elizabeth Esty to introduce a new ban on military-style assault weapons and high-capacity ammunition magazines.

    Now, make no mistake. The opponents of sensible gun control are gearing up for a nationwide fight, and they’ll stop at nothing to flood our communities with even more guns.

    Add your name to our petition at NoMoreAssaultWeapons.com to join voices all across the country in our call for the House and Senate to pass the Assault Weapons Ban of 2013 immediately.”

  78. 78.

    FlipYrWhig

    @Emma: But “Blue Dogs” isn’t the entirety of the issue here, if it’s true that Boxer and Leahy were dragging their feet. It seems more like a split between Democrats who think that the senate has a kind of ecology or culture that should stay largely the way it is even if it’s frustrating in the here and now, on one side, and Democrats who want shit to get done, on the other. In my view, it has to suck to work your way into a senate seat and then be told that the rules of the game are to sit quietly for a few years and not to try very hard to do anything. If you’re any kind of Type A personality, it has to be agony.

  79. 79.

    Brachiator

    @Roger Moore:

    I can’t imagine that the market is that big, so you don’t need a massive assembly line. Assuming that they’re authentically worn and not just sprayed with fake schoolgirl scent, I’d think the easiest approach would be to recruit girls who like the idea of wearing brand new panties every day and aren’t too weirded out by perverts sniffing them. You could probably get some of them to do it for the wardrobe benefit alone.

    Wasn’t there a famous Caltech prank involved with coming up with fake schoolgirl scent for used panties? I think the Chemistry Department was in on it.

    But then again, I would think that Fake Invisible Internet Girlfriends would go commando.

    ETA: I am totally pulling your leg here. No harm intended. I think I saw in an earlier thread that you have a connection to Caltech.

  82. 82.

    Roger Moore

    @Brachiator:

    But then again, I would think that Fake Invisible Internet Girlfriends would go commando.

    Fake Internet Girlfriends would presumably wear whatever their boyfriends wanted them too, at least if they’re only required to provide written descriptions rather than photographic evidence. If you want your F.I.G to go commando, she will; if you prefer a particular style of underwear, that’s what you’ll get. Isn’t that the major point of the business, that you get the girlfriend you want?

    And yes, I was at Caltech (’94, BS Chemistry, Fleming). I even participated in a prank or two, and saw several outstanding ones. I was never a major player in anything bigger than rewriting the periodic table to send messages, but I helped a bit in turning somebody’s room upside-down. Nothing really legendary, though.

  83. 83.

    Brachiator

    @Roger Moore:

    Fake Internet Girlfriends would presumably wear whatever their boyfriends wanted them to.

    Well, there is the story about the schizophrenic guy whose Fake Internet Girlfriend had a mind of her own.

    @Raven:

    CalTech hijacked the scoreboard in the 84 Illinois-UCLA Rose Bowl!

    And didn’t they once change the Hollywood sign to read “Caltech?”

  84. 84.

    YellowJournalism

    @Just Some Fuckhead:

    You don’t have to spend any money to get a fake online girlfriend. Hell, I got a half dozen right here on Balloon Juice.

    Shhhh….Nobody tell him that they’re all just Tunch. Poor cat got confused by the term “cat fishing.”

  85. 85.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    I don’t have data or graphs or anything, but does it seem to anyone else that Tucker Carlson gets more dumberer as time goes on?

    Tucker CarlsonVerified
    ‏@ TuckerCarlson
    The administration boasts about sending women to the front lines on the same day Democrats push the Violence Against Women Act.

  88. 88.

    NotMax

    The problem I have with re-institution of the talking filibuster is that it is one of those things which looks good on paper but bumps up rudely against changes in procedure wrought since it was last in force.

    In the era of C-SPAN (and sound bites) giving exclusive and uninterrupted access to broadcast from the Senate floor to the minority alters the equation.

    It is not all that many steps removed from, for example, requiring the majority to pay for the minority’s advertisements.

    Granted that the live audience for C-SPAN2 is not all that large; however the extended use of the stage for 10, 20, 30 hours or more carries an unbalanced perception of clout and authority as well as an opportunity for – let’s use the word – propaganda, of a nature in modern society which is both impactful and readily repeatable (both germane to and unrelated to the bill at hand) that was not a consideration of such import when the talking filibuster did exist.

  89. 89.

    MikeJ

    @NotMax: That’s not actually an issue. If the republicans want to take the floor and talk non stop, there is absolutely nothing stopping them from doing that right now. In the Senate, when you have the floor it is yours until you cede it.

    The question was about requiring them to take the floor. If you institute the 41 to continue rule replacing the 60 to stop forcing them to keep the floor makes sense. Without that change, it actually makes it harder on the majority.

  90. 90.

    Roger Moore

    @Brachiator:

    CalTech hijacked the scoreboard in the 84 Illinois-UCLA Rose Bowl!

    And didn’t they once change the Hollywood sign to read “Caltech?”

    Yes, they did both these things. They also hacked UW’s halftime card display stunt so that they spelled out “Caltech” instead of “Huskies”. Probably the best prank while I was there was the Millikan pond whale, though turning Beckman Auditorium into a giant birthday cake for the institute’s 100th birthday was fairly impressive.

  91. 91.

    NotMax

    here is absolutely nothing stopping them from doing that right now. In the Senate, when you have the floor it is yours until you cede it.

    Not entirely. Debate (for example, on cloture) is often time-restricted.

    Also too, the hook of “I suggest the absence of a quorum.” and other point of order tactics.

  93. 93.

    Roger Moore

    @efgoldman:

    Can you buy that in spray cans, the same as the phony “new car scent” that the used car dealers apply?

    I was figuring they might just treat them with a bit of perfume that was heavy on musk and pretend it was scent that had gotten their by a schoolgirl wearing them. Think about it. Does the average guy who has to buy used panties from a vending machine know what authentic ones smell like?

  94. 94.

    JPL

    Since this is an open thread, my dog is allowed to sleep at the end of the bed. Last night it was colder than usual so she moved up closer to me along with her toy and blanket.
    At three this morning I rolled over and heard a OhNo… Here is her toy.. link

  96. 96.

    Raven

    @JPL: We had to give the dogs the boot because of the Princesses’ back issues. The only reprieve is when I end up on the couch.

  98. 98.

    Raven

    @JPL: It’s hilarious. The only thing the Bohdi really cares about is the ball. However, our friends brought their new puppy over and all the sudden the rat, the chicken and the squeaky hamburger got important. Lil Bit doesn’t care about any of it.

  99. 99.

    Brachiator

    @Roger Moore:

    Does the average guy who has to buy used panties from a vending machine know what authentic ones smell like?

    There was a “CSI” episode where a guy was a panty sniffing connoisseur. In fact, turns out that this is the title of the episode, The Panty Sniffer.

    While Catherine and Vartann stake out the drug dealers, Archie Kao stumbles across the body of Sasha Katsaros, the hotel’s event planner, on the loading dock. Archie notices the woman isn’t wearing any underwear, and head of security Finn Thomas tells Langston and Nick that Sasha was overseeing a private auction hosted by Lon Rose. The two CSIs visit the auction and learn the exclusive items are worn women’s underwear vacuum-sealed in bags—or taken directly from models.

    But I always figured that some advertised premium panties really are “freshened” or whatever by some elderly meth head in Barstow using the money she gets to top off her Social Security checks.

  103. 103.

    Brachiator

    I love how the GOP is trying to top themselves in who can come up with the best metaphor for an apparently unstoppable President Obama.

    You recently had the great Orange One crying in his tan about how Obama was trying to annihilate the GOP.

    And now you’ve got Newt Gingrich comparing Obama and House Republicans to Gulliver and Lilliput:

    His first piece of guidance: Stop sending a poor sap to go mano a mano with the leader of the free world.
    __
    “Any time you get one person taking on the president of the United States, the one person is going to lose,” Gingrich told reporters at the conference before his talk. “The presidency is too big a system, they have too big a pulpit. I couldn’t by myself take on Clinton. But when we got every House Republican to understand Medicare as an issue, we could win the issue in 1996. It’s a little bit of Gulliver and Lilliput. When you have enough Lilliputians, you start winning.”
    __
    In the most recent iteration, one can assume that President Barack Obama is Gulliver the giant and House Speaker John Boehner the lone, tiny Lilliputian—one who has been the face of the party during intense negotiations with the president.

    These dopes are bouncing between being ridiculous and being pathetic.

  106. 106.

    MikeJ

    @NotMax:

    Debate (for example, on cloture) is often time-restricted.

    Debate is only time limited after cloture. That’s the bedrock principle of the Senate. You never debate cloture, you vote on it. After cloture however, each member gets one hour before a final vote.

  107. 107.

    BlueDWarrior

    Hrm, I’m fairly sure that those of us on the Left are upset that Filibuster Reform got watered down as it was, but honestly, it reminds me of the Public Option.

    In that the votes weren’t there, were never there, and a majority leader looks really damn stupid putting something up for a vote that can’t pass.

    See: John Boehner 4 weeks ago.

  108. 108.

    jibeaux

    I don’t understand fake schoolgirl scent. I understand fake baby scent, though. I would buy blankets with baby scent and just inhale them when work sucks.
    Okay, I’m female, but I don’t wanna be your FIG.

  109. 109.

    PeakVT

    @NotMax: I once encountered Gingrich years ago (early 1996) in Pentagon City Mall. He was standing outside a store where his wife was shopping. A few people started pointing, and he whipped out a paperback and started to pretend to speed read it by running his finger across the page rapidly, and then turning the pages after a few passes. IIRC it was Toffler’s Future Shock. The incident cracks me up to this day.

  110. 110.

    NotMax

    @Sigh. “On cloture,” not “about cloture.”

    As in: Debate will commence on Tuesday. That doesn’t mean the debate is about whether or not it is Tuesday.

  113. 113.

    Silva

    Reid did what his “Overlords” wanted. There is no way in hell they want any kind of populist ideas coming to the top. The shift is toward austerity, it’s what’s for dinner.
    Fucking Sanders must be popping a vein in his lobe. I know I am.
    This shit is such a joke, politics, Haaa!, what a laugh!

    “Let’s wait and see what comes up”, that’s what fucking comes up.
    Open your eyes apologists for sensible reforms.
    Done.

  117. 117.

    NotMax

    @Raven

    North shore surf has been reported in weather forecasts as “EXTRAORDINARILY high” for some time now. That translates to over the 8 to 16 feet “dangerously high” level.

    Should calm down over the weekend as wind shifts to the southeast, then return again Monday or Tuesday, along with showers.

  120. 120.

    Silva

    WOW, this is a great thread. Discussing the North Shore, and it’s possible names.
    Unreal, not really for this site anymore.
    Got any Cat pics??

  122. 122.

    muddy

    @FlipYrWhig: @Jim, Foolish Literalist: I asked Sen Leahy about how he would vote about the filibuster bill. He said he’d go along with the caucus, but that he preferred the Merkley version. If he’s struggling it’s because he wants it stronger, not because he doesn’t want it at all.
    (reply better late than never?)

  123. 123.

    Kathy in St. Louis

    I can’t think of one clever thing to say about this. It’s too pathetic to find much humor in it. If you can’t or have no interest in attracting a girlfriend, man up.

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