Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Pessimism assures that nothing of any importance will change.

Being the leader of the world means to be the leader of peace.

Insiders who complain to politico: please report to the white house office of shut the fuck up.

We are aware of all internet traditions.

People are complicated. Love is not.

My years-long effort to drive family and friends away has really paid off this year.

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

And now I have baud making fun of me. this day can’t get worse.

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

You cannot shame the shameless.

Wow, you are pre-disappointed. How surprising.

Too often we confuse noise with substance. too often we confuse setbacks with defeat.

It’s the corruption, stupid.

Shallow, uninformed, and lacking identity

We are builders in a constant struggle with destroyers. let’s win this.

All your base are belong to Tunch.

So it was an October Surprise A Day, like an Advent calendar but for crime.

Optimism opens the door to great things.

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

“Jesus paying for the sins of everyone is an insult to those who paid for their own sins.”

Americans barely caring about Afghanistan is so last month.

We still have time to mess this up!

Schmidt just says fuck it, opens a tea shop.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / One Kid Had It Worse Than That (Open Thread)

Reader Interactions

45Comments

  1. 1.

    Scotius

    I always loved their song “Afternoons and Coffee Spoons”. Easily the most upbeat song about dying of cancer I have ever heard.

  3. 3.

    The Snarxist Formerly Known as Kryptik

    There just seems to be this weird ethereal quality to the song, especially when the chorals come in.

    Sad most people seem to remember it as ‘that humming song’.

  4. 4.

    lojasmo

    Deleted work email access from all my home devices…check
    Signed up for WMCA membership…check.
    40 minute run and 55 minute yoga session..check.

    ETA: on an 18 hour fast. Just tucking in to some chicken wild rice soup.

    Feeling good.

  6. 6.

    MattR

    Hate to be a downer but does anyone have any suggestions for a funeral home in Manhattan (or similarly, anywhere I should definitely avoid)?

  9. 9.

    ranchandsyrup

    OH Noes! It wormed its way into my brainz. *Shakes fist at Betty*

    Loved this quote from George Packer on getting older/get off my lawn/onions on belt:

    One of the biggest problems with getting older, other than the place where it’s headed, is a massive projection about the state of the world: by fifty, the obvious fact of your own decline is easily mistaken for an intimation of the world’s. And, since there’s never a shortage of evidence that things are, indeed, worse than they used to be, it’s incredibly satisfying to indulge the idea, and easy to confuse it with a veteran’s seasoned judgment. That’s the impulse you have to resist if you want to retain your credibility while you lose other features.

  10. 10.

    ranchandsyrup

    @MikeJ: I hope they both lose.

    Wayne Rooney was depicted as a “hooligan” in the Spanish press on Tuesday, with sports daily Marca also describing the England striker as “a freckled demon” who is “built like a barrel packed with gunpowder” and on his way to “blow up the Bernabeu”.

    Asked about the unflattering reports in the Spanish press, Ferguson added: “Rooney can’t read Spanish, so we will be all right.”

  11. 11.

    Capri

    @WereBear:

    Except death due to aflatoxin (liver failure, central nervous system problems) is nothing like death due to anti-freeze poisoning (kidney failure), unlike what is claimed on the petition. If a post-mortem was performed on affected animals, they would be quite easy to differentiate as well.

    There are some very good aflatoxin screens available – down to parts per billion – so it’s not like Purina couldn’t find it if they looked.

    Those semi-moist foods do contain a lot of propylene glycol and other junk, many pets can’t tolerate them.

  12. 12.

    schtum

    When this song came out, I was sure it was a gag and the lead singer was Dan Akroyd in a wig. I couldn’t understand why the rest of the world was playing along, treating it like a real band.

  15. 15.

    Steeplejack

    Man U. and Real Madrid teeing it up right now. Or, uh, whatever they do in soccer. Starting. Okay, then.

  17. 17.

    ruemara

    After a morning of non-stop whining from the local radio liberals about the President’s speech both “seeming like a campaign speech”, “just the same thing as he said before the election, why didn’t he say something different” along with “and why doesn’t he use the bully pulpit to get things done” I swore off their stupid and worked in silence. Never seen two such counter productive arguments uttered in such rapid succession. Hoping to have real progress on some creative projects today, but all my mind can wrap around is mailing off these Mexican Chocolate Chipotle Scones to unsuspecting friends in time for V-day. And what to do with my life.

  20. 20.

    MattR

    @Gin & Tonic: Upper East Side, preferably. We are still trying to figure everything out, including if it will be cremation or burial.

    @WaterGirl: Thanks. It was my aunt who passed away yesterday. Getting involved in Internet conversation was a bit much for her, but she read the posts and comments here regularly, loved Tunch, Lily and all the other critters and was always excited to receive her calendar as my Hanukkah present.

  25. 25.

    Bighorn Ordovician Dolomite

    This is unrelated to anything, but jeez, I just wanna mention that I was curious as to how marketable my geology skills are in today’s oilfield (I have been out of that line of work for close to fifteen years) and so I go to “Rigzone” one flippin’ time and now every damn youtube video I watch is letting me know how I can go “From the Desk, to the Decks” or “From the boat to the bit.” Shit, I hated working in the oil bz and now I’m afraid a press gang will come along and Shanghai my ass if I’m not careful.

  27. 27.

    JoyceH

    Here’s my open thread question – what the heck happened to Ted Nugent? Before SOTU, he was talking like he would have ‘plenty to say’ before and after the speech, and then as far as I can make out, he hasn’t said a word. Did the GOP establishment throw a bag over his head and hustle him into the back of an unmarked car to zoom away to an undisclosed location? Because otherwise, you know there would have been plenty of cameras pointed at him in the hope/expectation that he would say something newsworthily outrageous.

  28. 28.

    Jim C

    I’ve always liked the song, too.

    Years ago it oddly made the list in an MTV special “25 Lame” which surveyed twenty-five videos that were (at the time) deemed lame and mocked (in a seemingly unscripted manner) by a group of comedians including Chris Kattan, Denis Leary, Jeaneane Garofalo and Jon Stewart. While it’s mostly remembered nowadays for Vanilla Ice trashing the set after they brought him in to roast “Ice Ice Baby,” I always remember Jon Stewart’s thoughtful response to the play the kids in the video are putting on: “I’ve got to say, this is a school that puts its money in the drama department.”

  30. 30.

    DFH no.6

    @schtum:
    Crash Test Dummies not a real band, huh?

    “God Shuffled His Feet” (their 1993 album on which “MMM” appeared) was one of my favorites from the 90s.

    Still is. Solid “alt-rock” tunes with thoughtful and interesting lyrics.

    YMMV, of course. Probably there’s some band/album/song that you like that I think sucks. De gustibus non est disputandum and all that.

  34. 34.

    lojasmo

    @schtum:

    Yeah, Mmm Mmm Mmm was a silly little ditty, but the album as a whole was pretty damn great. As others have said God Shuffled his Feet was a very good song, among others.

    Might have to try to dig that one up.

  37. 37.

    Katy M

    This is one of those songs that has unfortunately lyrics, but compositionally and musically is a great song. I don’t really even care much about lyrics, anyway–my favorite band is Hungarian (all Hungarian language), and I don’t know a word.

  38. 38.

    ruemara

    Oh, the scones are kinda simple. The keyword here is “overdone”. Take a simple scone recipe. Add about a cup of powdered chocolate and 1 teaspoon of chipotle powder to the flour, baking soda, baking powder and salt. Add in about a teaspoon of ground cinnamon. Mix well. Chop up a bar of of 72% cacao chocolate bar, because more is better. Nothing too fancy, you want finely chopped but not grated, because I’m a lazy baker. 3 large cinnamon candy canes, smashed to bits. Mix into powdered ingredients. 1/2 cup of organic sugar, because when we make crap, we make the best crap we can. 1 cup of unsweetened apple sauce. 1/4 cup of eggbeaters, because, healthy y’all. 8 tbsps of chopped chilled butter. Mix in with your fingers, because this mix is too much for any wussy pastry cutter. You could need about a quarter cup more flour. Roll the mess out between wax paper, because it’s a mess. butter and flour parchment paper on a baking sheet. preheat oven to 400. cut into hearts, because those cutters were like, 99 cents on mark down after valentines in 2009. place on sheet, bake about 12-15 minutes. melty sticky spicy goodness should cool a bit before moving onto a plate. try not to eat more than you’re supposed to give away. people with standards can do shit like put frosting or crap on them. I’m lazy and can’t do a straight line outside of illustrator, so whatevs, just eat.

    You’re welcome.

  39. 39.

    DFH no.6

    @wasabi gasp:
    I actually liked their song “God Shuffled His Feet” best, but “mmm” – while maybe a “novelty” song to some, and I get why – was a song I liked 20 years ago, and still like today (as I do most of the album). I enjoy Roberts’ vocals, strange as they are.

    schtum may have only heard “mmm” since it was the one song by CTD that got any airplay (and was a hit for 15 minutes or so) and decided that it was too weird to be taken seriously, or schtum may have heard more by CTD and just didn’t like them.

    Either way, schtum is certainly entitled to schtum’s opinion.

  40. 40.

    schtum

    @DFH no.6: I think wasabi clarified my point well enough, but in case not, I saw/heard this song for the first time on MTV and literally thought the singer was Dan Akroyd, because they kind of look alike from some angles, and everything about the video and the performance just seemed like some weird joke, albeit without any clear punchline. I did eventually realize that they were a real band, but I’m still not sure if this song is meant to be serious or silly.

  45. 45.

    Bia

    @Capri:
    Try making your own moist cat and dog food. My cat was barfing a lot no matter what dry food I gave her (she doesn’t like canned food) so I tried beating an eggwith some warm water and soaking her dry food in it (this takes just a modicum of pre-planning,,you can keep the rest in the frige) and she loves it that way and no more over-eating and barfing…Yaaay!

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