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T R E 4 5 O N

If you voted for Trump, you don’t get to speak about ethics, morals, or rule of law.

The press swings at every pitch, we don’t have to.

I might just take the rest of the day off and do even more nothing than usual.

I’m more christian than these people and i’m an atheist.

I really should read my own blog.

Republicans choose power over democracy, every day.

This must be what justice looks like, not vengeful, just peaceful exuberance.

We cannot abandon the truth and remain a free nation.

Let’s show the world that autocracy can be defeated.

The media handbook says “controversial” is the most negative description that can be used for a Republican.

Black Jesus loves a paper trail.

Give the craziest people you know everything they want and hope they don’t ask for more? Great plan.

The choice is between normal and crazy.

If you cannot answer whether trump lost the 2020 election, you are unfit for office.

The fight for our country is always worth it. ~Kamala Harris

Celebrate the fucking wins.

Our job is not to persuade republicans but to defeat them.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires republicans to act in good faith.

“What are Republicans afraid of?” Everything.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Narcissists are always shocked to discover other people have agency.

Well, whatever it is, it’s better than being a Republican.

Balloon Juice, where there is always someone who will say you’re doing it wrong.

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Open Thread

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Went to Stubbs for the Gospel Sunday Brunch, which was fun, but I actually enjoyed the spinach enchiladas more than any of the meats. The gospel band downstairs was exactly what you expect a gospel band in the south to look like, complete with a a guy staring intently at his Roland as he plays.

Austin is kind of a weird city- lots of people out and about on a Sunday afternoon, and the bars are all filled with people drinking bloody mary’s and mimosas. Austin feels like New Orleans would if the entire population was alcoholic hipsters.

Speaking of hipsters, they are fucking everywhere down here. They’re like cockroaches- if you see one, you see dozens. You can’t walk five yards without dodging some skinny guy with lambchops, an atari t-shirt, and powder-blue corduroy pants, cruising down the road (sans helmet) on a fixie adorned with Arcade Fire stickers. Hipsters are like trustafarians with bad taste in edgy tattoos and body piercing. I’m kind of shocked that Rick Perry hasn’t declared a two-week open hunting season there are so many of them everywhere.

Off for thai food for dinner.

*** Update ***

Btw, saw this guy perform last night and he was AWESOME:

trent

His name is Trent Turner, and his website is out of date, so just look for him on youtube. Guy can play a guitar.

BTW- this may be one of the best iphone pictures I have ever taken, so clearly the key to my success in photography is drinking my weight in Maker’s Mark first. And I am not a small man.

Reader Interactions

180Comments

  1. 1.

    Mnemosyne

    Your ads know that I wear glasses, though they seem to have mistaken me for a young black man.

    This is getting a little creepy.

  3. 3.

    Chris

    I have never been to Texas, don’t really have any special plans to either, but “hipster” is definitely not the first thing I associate with that state. Serves me right for stereotyping, I guess.

  4. 4.

    BGinCHI

    We have hipster infestation issues here too.

    The only upside is beer in cans is more readily available.

    I assume, John, you’ll be riding a mechanical bull after the Thai food. Sounds like a flawless plan.

  7. 7.

    The Red Pen

    The hipsters arrived on merchant ships coming to trade with SXSW.

    They are an invasive species that is destroying habitat for Austin’s native libertarian-leaning stoners (e.g. John Mackey).

  8. 8.

    Tokyokie

    @BGinCHI: Nah, Austin doesn’t have bars with mechanical bulls. That was the attraction at the original Gilley’s outside Houston, although that place is long gone. (The mechanical bull, however, is at the Dallas Gilley’s.) Billy Bob’s in Fort Worth is the honky-tonk joint most associated with a mechanical bull these days.

    Of course, if guys wearing crummy straw fedoras rather than pricey straw cowboys hats would take an interest in mechanical bulls, Austin would have six of them by the weekend.

  9. 9.

    SiubhanDuinne

    So, am I the only person around here who wants to know more about “I met a girl”?

  10. 10.

    Mnemosyne

    Is “nerd” still the opposite of “hipster”? Because I’m pretty sure that my plans to put a wicker basket on my 3-speed bike makes me the opposite of the fixie riders.

    Oh, and watch out for those guys on fixies — a lot of them don’t actually know how to stop without brakes in an emergency. I’ve heard about all kinds of stories of close calls, with the most notable being the guy who told the story of going down a big hill here in downtown LA on his brakeless fixie and making an emergency left turn to avoid a car, only to realize he’d just managed to steer into the path a large truck. He put a brake on the bike after that one.

  15. 15.

    electricgrendel

    Oh man. If you were not a hateful curmudgeon I would buy you a drink while you were in town. And the hipsters mostly just infest downtown.

  16. 16.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @efgoldman:

    ETA: Never mind. I didn’t notice the date on the original Atlantic Wire story. Y’all have probably chewed this up and digested it while I was napping (which is my natural state).

    Wait, you’ve been napping for two solid months?

    May we just call you “Rip” from now on, or is that a name reserved for Palin or Romney spawn?

  18. 18.

    muddy

    Recently a young man described hipsters in his area as, “Guys in hats who keep clapping you on the back like they know you.” I knew just what he meant.

  19. 19.

    JPL

    One of my nieces was raised in Houston and went to UT for school. Once while visiting, we went to the local mall in Roswell and she commented that every one looked alike. just sayin!

  21. 21.

    Ash Can

    @SiubhanDuinne: Yeah, to hell with the hipsters. What about the girl? (And wouldn’t it be hilarious if “the girl” ended up being another stray dog or cat that’s going home with John and joining the menagerie?)

  23. 23.

    hildebrand

    Jesus Christ, Cole, no whining about hipsters in a state where the right-wing nut jobs outnumber the cattle. We need the hipsters for even a modicum of balance, lest the whole state spin off into some ghastly temporal-political black hole.

  25. 25.

    Cassidy

    After my experiences in San Antonio, I’ll take the hipsters of Austin over the entitled shits and kept women of the hill country any day of the week. Too many goddamned white people in San Antonio.

  28. 28.

    FlipYrWhig

    @The Red Pen:

    They are an invasive species that is destroying habitat for Austin’s native libertarian-leaning stoners (e.g. John Mackey).

    The species as seen in the original Slacker?

  33. 33.

    gbear

    You go to Austin one week before the start of SXSW and bitch that the town is full of hipsters. Why don’t you stop at Branson, MO on your way home and complain it’s full of olds.

  34. 34.

    Suffern ACE

    @SiubhanDuinne: well it’s worth bringing up again in light of the news about the opinionators being paid to shill for Malaysia. It might be worth even asking our own sides opinionators who might be paying them.

  35. 35.

    Ultraviolet Thunder

    Regarding hipsters and beer, my brother proposed the following: if you order PBR you get it free but the bartender throws it at your head. In the can.

  36. 36.

    lamh35

    Ok, since you mentioned NOLA, this here is how we do it down in the lower9!

    My aunt (my godchild Maddie’s mother) and her brother (they are twins) had their 46th birthday party last night. I worked this weekend and I was hella tired, but I went ahead and drove to NOLA for the party. I drove back late last night, went to work this morning. I’m glad I did. All except 1 uncle were there (a few I hadn’t seen in a while.

    Anyway, my family have been living in the same lower 9th neighborhood since before I was born (my mom is 53) and I think even before my mom was born. So anyway, when they have a party, the whole “old neighborhood” peeps come to every party.

    The old people party and reminisce(sp?) and the young guns sit around an laugh at the old people, but since we are such a close knit bunch, even the young people know the old songs. The thing about NOLA is that if you are born and raised there, you know the old music as well as the new.

    So anyway, this is how we roll in NOLA lower 9th. If it’s a party with an older crowd in NOLA, then you betta be ready to “wobble with it”…LOL.

    My extended family…

  39. 39.

    red dog

    Austin used to be only city worth going to in Texas and now there are none. Which neighborhood or city will be hip next? Maybe Louisville or Sacramento? It’s already happening but if I knew it wouldn’t be hip.

  40. 40.

    CaseyL

    @SiubhanDuinne: Either “the meet” fizzled, or it’s gone so well John’s afraid to jinx it by talking about it.

    ETA: Had to look up “fixie,” and laughed like anything. I never learned to like riding a geared bike, and now it looks like my favorite kind – single speed – is popular again. (When you’ve ridden a single-speed for years and years, the hardest habit to break is pedaling backward to stop. Can’t tell you how often I damnnear crashed into stuff on a geared bike.)

  41. 41.

    different-church-lady

    I’m kind of shocked that Rick Perry hasn’t declared a two-week open hunting season there are so many of them everywhere.

    No no, you don’t understand: republicans only declare hunting seasons on things are endangered, not plentiful.

  43. 43.

    Suffern ACE

    Do hipsters really still drink PBR? I was one. And followed it from the lounge music martini days through alt country and roots rock. It’s the latter part where truck stop hats and PBR kind of made it too dull to continue on. But that was 15 years ago.

  46. 46.

    Ultraviolet Thunder

    @red dog:

    Which neighborhood or city will be hip next?

    Detroit, probably. It costs next to nothing to live there. There are several colleges and universities. Thriving arts/music/theater scene. Tons of grimy, ‘authentic’ bars to cheaply get drunk in.
    That would complete the destruction of a once great American city, so it will certainly happen.
    Oh, and by the way, this week Michigan’s GOP governor announced he was appointing an Emergency Financial Manager for Detroit, whose authority will override the Mayor and City Council. The manager will be a Republican crony who will proceed to sell off the city’s capital assets like real estate to business pals for pennies on the dollar, pillaging the distressed town at the expense of the remaining residents. That will be painful to watch.

  47. 47.

    Dissatisfied Customer

    Cut the hipsters some slack, John. They’re all going to wind up as employees of SMU grads.

  48. 48.

    RobertDSC-eMac 1.25

    Back in the early 00s, Stubbs was a mecca of sorts for fans of fucknut actor Russell Crowe. He and his band used to play there once in a while. At the time, I was a fan of his, but never made the trip down there to see him & the band.

    I did catch him at the House Of Blues in Hollywood, though.

  50. 50.

    eemom

    Cole, do tell me and all the other nice people about the lady…..before I say a lot of mean things to provoke you into another rant about how evil I am.

  51. 51.

    Mnemosyne

    @CaseyL:

    It’s not just a single speed — you have to continuously pedal it to keep going (so, for example, you can’t just glide down a hill — you have to keep pedaling all the way down or the bike seizes up on you).

    I can’t get it online, but one of the recent Bicycle Times magazines had a guy’s tale of his friend’s encounter with a fixie where his pant leg got stuck and basically ripped his pants mostly off while completely bollixing up the chain. I think the pull quote was something like, “If you see a guy with his pants half torn off hopping down the street like he’s having sex with the bike, you stare. You stare like Sasquatch and the Loch Ness Monster just rode through your kitchen on a unicycle.”

    ETA: Oh, and a fixie has no brakes at all unless you install one. The “backwards pedal” brake is apparently called a “coaster brake.” I haven’t had one of those since my Schwinn Fair Lady, so I’m pretty used to hand brakes by now.

  52. 52.

    Old Dan and Little Ann

    @Tokyokie: Ha. I wrote that damn bull when I was visiting my sister who lives in Dallas. Good times. Good times.

  53. 53.

    Rosie Outlook

    @Mnemosyne: Some data miner out thinks I am rich and black–doubly wrong. Lately I have been inundated with catalogs selling very expensive clothes marketed to black women. The data miner did get my sex right, so one out of 3 ain’t bad. They may have decided I’m black because of the zip code I usually shop in (near my work) but I can’t figure out how the hell they could think I’m rich. I’m one of the 22 middle class people left in the U.S.

    If I ever start a business, I will take data mining with a mine’s worth of salt grains.

    Has anyone read The Power of Habit, in which Charles Duhigg claims Target knows you’re pregnant almost as soon as you do? I’m skeptical. We rich black folks are like that.

  54. 54.

    Skepticat

    I’d like to share a musical enthusiasm – http://griffinhousemusic.com/

    A friend from California introduced me to his work, and I met him in Virginia at one of his shows in November. A very talented–and very nice–guy.

  56. 56.

    danielx

    @Mnemosyne:

    I don’t know what you’re complaining about; earlier today I got an ad featuring Sarah Palin winking at me. I don’t care if it was calling for people to protest against her bullshit, I don’t want to see that – that wink will no doubt feature in some very unpleasant dreams.

    @efgoldman:

    Now @SiubhanDuinne: won’t respect me in the morning.

    She doesn’t respect you now.

    From what I’ve heard, Austin is an island of sanity in a sea of redneck shitkickers, kind of like Atlanta that way. Every state needs one, even if it is infested with hipsters (probably less than half of whom can change a tire successfully).

  58. 58.

    Gin & Tonic

    People are tiptoeing around it, but the one and only question is did Cole get laid or not?

  61. 61.

    Ash Can

    @Mnemosyne: The idea of anyone other than downtown delivery people willingly riding those things strikes me as the dumbest thing anyone could do other than voting Republican when you make less than $500k/year.

  62. 62.

    Gin & Tonic

    @Mnemosyne: “Fixie” comes from “fixed gear”, which is what you describe. As long as the rear wheel is rotating, your legs need to be, too.

    Ages and ages ago, a fixed gear was recommended for early-season training, if you were a racing cyclist or aspired in that direction, as the “fixedness” of it forced a leg speed that you didn’t get otherwise, and was thought to help build fast-twitch muscle. I kind of like the way the whole setup felt, and would ride a fixed gear not just in the spring. But it was only one of my bikes. And it was the 1970’s.

  63. 63.

    Mnemosyne

    @danielx:

    Okay, I’ve gotta agree with you there — I always prefer to get a photo of a handsome man of any race in my ads than a picture of Snowbilly Snooki.

  64. 64.

    Hill Dweller

    The Republicans’ plan is starting to come together(LA Times):

    Fired up as once-unimaginable spending cuts start to slice the federal budget, Republicans are launching a new phase in their austerity campaign — resurrecting the party’s cost-cutting plan to turn Medicare into a voucher-like system for future seniors.

  66. 66.

    MomSense

    @lamh35:

    I would like to be adopted! We never have dancing at our family parties – aggressive card playing but no dancing.

  67. 67.

    Mnemosyne

    @Rosie Outlook:

    I do get a lot of ads for places I shop online, like Title Nine (and I try to click through occasionally to put a dime or two in John’s pocket), but I haven’t quite figured out how the algorithm went from women’s sports clothes to ladies’ sex toys to African-American men who wear glasses.

    Unless maybe I was supposed to click on the ad because the guy was good-looking? I’m not really sure why a hot guy is supposed to make me buy their accessories.

  68. 68.

    Ultraviolet Thunder

    @Hill Dweller:

    This is great news. The GOP is basically putting their own head in the oven and daring the 30-to-50 year olds to turn on the gas.
    No way is killing future benefits for people who have been paying taxes for Medicare for decades going to fly. It’s suicide.

  69. 69.

    Davis X. Machina

    @gbear: You can’t — at least not beginning later in March. The airport in Branson is one of the facilities scheduled to lose its real-bodies-in-the-control-tower. I wonder how many flights a day go AirTran and Frontier slot in there once they’re all reduced to using Unicom.

  71. 71.

    Ultraviolet Thunder

    @Davis X. Machina: Well, I’m gonna be screwed by the airport labor cutbacks. I sometimes fly 7 days a week. Canceled and delayed flights mean our customers have to wait longer to get their machines repaired, and lose money in the process. I can chill in the cozy terminal and wait for the next flight but it’s gonna suck to be behind on production and hanging fire for the repairman.

  72. 72.

    General Stuck

    @Hill Dweller:

    Fortunately for republicans, there is no limit on how many times you can commit political suicide. Groundhog Day, and Weekend At Berny’s double feature.

  73. 73.

    Hill Dweller

    @Ultraviolet Thunder: I can’t wait for the Obama administration to absolutely pummel Paul Ryan for this. They better have video of Ryan’s campaign appearances, where he accused Obama of “stealing” money from Medicare, cued up.

  78. 78.

    dance around in your bones

    @Mnemosyne: Jeebus, a fixie sounds like a stupid excuse for a bike.

    That said, I once lent my ten-speed to a friend who pulled on the front brakes while going downhill, went head first into the pavement and broke off her two front teeth.

    You gotta know how to use whatever bike you are riding. It helps, anyway.

    I used to ride my Schwinn with coaster brakes like a maniac – like, standing on the seat with one leg stretched out behind me going down a big ol’ long hill. We didn’t even wear helmets back in the day. I don’t think they’d even invented them yet.

  79. 79.

    David Koch

    Obama administration to absolutely pummel Paul Ryan for this.

    Hillary is gonna squash him like a bug in 2016

  81. 81.

    Hill Dweller

    @General Stuck:

    Fortunately for republicans, there is no limit on how many times you can commit political suicide. Groundhog Day, and Weekend At Berny’s double feature.

    I’ve seen multiple articles describing Republicans as giddy, happy and/or fired up after the sequester kicked in. Their utter lack of political awareness is stunning.

  82. 82.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @danielx:

    earlier today I got an ad featuring Sarah Palin winking at me.

    Oddly, I was reading a book earlier today where a father told his daughter not to wink, because “Only whores wink.”

  83. 83.

    Marcelo

    Where are you getting your Thai? Thai Passion downtown (it’s AWESOME and open late!) or Sway or what? The best Thai restaurant, Titaya’s, is currently closed for renovations.

    If you’re here a little longer you may wish to take advantage of the EXCELLENT Chinese and Japanese fare. Asia Cafe up north and Szechuan House on North Burnet are INSANELY good Chinese restaurants. Michi Ramen is a new ramen noodle house on Lamar south of 183 that serves damn fine ramen noodles. We’re going through a bit of a ramen renaissance right now.

    Also, one thing Austin does damn well is local beer. Austin Beerworks, Live Oak, St. Arnolds, Real Ale, and of course, Shiner are all quite close and excellent.

    Yeah the hipster thing is annoying, but honestly, the best thing about Austin is that it’s always been a “live and let live” city. Everyone does their own thing and no one judges or raises a fuss. I think people complaining about hipsters and what they wear and how much they suck say more about the people complaining than the hipsters. They’re young, they’ll get out of it. And that kind of complaint has now made its way to Austin locals, who have gotten less friendly over the years. It’s sad to see.

  87. 87.

    Mike in NC

    @David Koch: Paul Ryan couldn’t hack it as an assistant manager at some Wendy’s franchise. He has zero future in national politics.

  88. 88.

    srv

    @Mnemosyne: I never understood the fixie thing.

    Now brakeless, yeah. Back in Austin in the 80’s I had a Le Tour and new brakes were not on my semester financial plan. So we managed.

    Now I’d be hip.

  89. 89.

    Cassidy

    @srv: Gear bikes scare me. I don’t ride a bike, but the appeal of knowing that things won’t get tangled up suddenly is cool.

  90. 90.

    Citizen Alan

    Personally, I consider hipsters as a class to be “Mostly Harmless.” Admittedly, Mississippi hipsters may be atypical of the breed, but the ones I know all seem to basically be “young people who want to be trendy and fashionable but can’t afford it and so have gone to great lengths to develop a fashion style based on thrift store clothing.” IOW, like grunge during the 1991 Recession except you still have to wash your hair. I have a good friend who I consider to be a hipster and his entire wardrobe consists of about eight t-shirts (all with ironic messages or vintage 80’s gamer logos) and three pairs of jeans. He showed up all excited last week because he found a bitch’n black and white check sport coat for $5 that’s in his size to wear to bars and shit.

  91. 91.

    Suzanne

    @Ultraviolet Thunder:

    Detroit, probably. It costs next to nothing to live there.

    No, no, no. Hipsters don’t object to price. Their parents are footing the bills, so, of course, they look for the most “authentic” and yet totally inauthentic place they can find.

    I’d say Tucson, but there’s already a shitload of hipsters in Tucson.

  92. 92.

    JPL

    @David Koch: Paul Ryan is the only person to run with a budget that adds six trillion to deficit the first ten years. Of course, once he rids us of medicare, that budget will balance in thirty years on the souls of dead folks.

  93. 93.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Citizen Alan:

    “young people who want to be trendy and fashionable but can’t afford it and so have gone to great lengths to develop a fashion style based on thrift store clothing.” IOW, like grunge during the 1991 Recession except you still have to wash your hair

    Punks and hippies too. It was ever thus.

  94. 94.

    FlipYrWhig

    @Citizen Alan:

    He showed up all excited last week because he found a bitch’n black and white check sport coat for $5 that’s in his size to wear to bars and shit.

    And then he said, “I’m gonna pop some tags, only got twenty dollars in my pocket, I’m, I’m, I’m hunting, looking for a come up, this is fucking awesome.”

  95. 95.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Suzanne:

    they look for the most “authentic” and yet totally inauthentic place they can find.

    Akron? Jefferson City? Duluth?

  96. 96.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    @Citizen Alan:

    I think I would like that person. I am so cheap I won’t even shop at thrift stores anymore unless they are having a bag sale. I mean why spend $3.00 on a shirt when you can get a bagful for $5.00?

  97. 97.

    dance around in your bones

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Punks and hippies too. It was ever thus.

    Yup. We all created our own fabulous outfits from thrift stores, Army/Navy stores, and (in the case of hippies)India print bedspreads and (on occasion) brass bells.

    Gah! Gah! I’m having the anxiety again about the dearth of BJ threads!! What will I do when I can’t sleep (again) tonight? Front-pagers, get it together!

    ETA: And what the heck is going on with “I met a girl” ? Did she discover the blog and flee like a scared kitteh?

  98. 98.

    Marmot

    John, for an authentic country bar, head to Ginny’s Little Linghorn on Burnet. But check to see who’s playing. Sometimes it’s Texas blues, and super, super lame. The country is top notch.

    Also, it ain’t the South. Austin sits at the very edge of the old South, hence the festival name SXSW. The Balcones Fault nearby marks the end of good farmland (the South) and the beginning of the West, where ranching is the historical industry.

    The real South feels like a foreign country to me.

    /pedantic Texan

  100. 100.

    Ultraviolet Thunder

    @Suzanne:

    No, no, no. Hipsters don’t object to price.

    My mistake. I assumed that they dressed like refugees and rode minimalized bicycles out of poverty.

  102. 102.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Ultraviolet Thunder: Like any of the previous incarnations of youth culture, it starts with broke people making a virtue of necessity and then spreads. Eventually, there are expensive garments designed to look like the original cheap ones. These spread to middle aged suburbanites and one knows the fashion is over.

  103. 103.

    Violet

    @Suzanne:

    No, no, no. Hipsters don’t object to price. Their parents are footing the bills, so, of course, they look for the most “authentic” and yet totally inauthentic place they can find.

    There’s overlap between hipsters and trustafarians. Some hipsters have rich parents paying the bills. Some are wearing thrift store clothes because the economy sucks and it’s all they can afford and they’re making it their style. Rich hipsters are probably copying the original hipsters who did it out of necessity.

  105. 105.

    Suffern ACE

    @Omnes Omnibus: yeah. I don’t get the hipster hate. I can’t see many people on this site going to biker bars, leather bars, frat bars, sports bars and what have you any enjoying themselves. But they definitely don’t want to be around hipsters, either. Either there are more people on here than I think hang out at the 19th hole at the club, or we gots a lot of Folks here hanging out at at benigans after work.

  106. 106.

    Roger Moore

    @Hill Dweller:

    The Republicans’ plan is starting to come together

    It can’t be doing that well, since a major paper is already describing it as vouchers and pointing out that this goes against their promises. It’s almost as if the LA Times has been in business since before the last time Ryan proposed voucherizing Medicare and has a memory of what happened back then.

  108. 108.

    dance around in your bones

    @Omnes Omnibus: Quoted for truth.

    Amazing how much ‘high fashion’ originates from the street. Only much more expensive.

    I still love a deal from the thrift shop. Last two were a Liz Claiborne black velour jacket for $3 and a brown velour Venizia hoodie for $2.

    Haven’t bought an India print bedspread for a while, or even a flannel shirt. Or even any brass bells.

    ETA: Also, to me a hipster means some guy in a beret snapping his fingers while reciting poetry in a smokey bar.

  109. 109.

    Ultraviolet Thunder

    @Suffern ACE:

    It’s the same with every generation. To their elders they look/act like buffoons until about age 25. We just have to roll our eyes and wait for them to wake up one morning and be over their youth.

  111. 111.

    Tiny Tim

    I assume some of you people have noticed that the job market for 20somethings in most parts of the country is not so stellar. Sure there’s the odd trustifarian here and there, but in my experience the local hipsters don’t have any money. They’re educated and have aesthetic interests, but they don’t have any money. They drink PBR and wear thrift store clothing because they don’t have any money. They work hard at crap service jobs which don’t pay them any money. They live with several roommates because they don’t have any money. Most have limited career goals, because there are no careers.

    They’re pretty much the most harmless, least threatening, most talented, most educated, least bullying, most interesting young people movement we’ve seen in a long time. If you’re hating on hipsters it’s because you’re annoyed that young people are on your lawn.

  112. 112.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Suffern ACE: I never dressed hipster in my era but I definitely went that route musically.

    Me, I like the bars where you can be in a suit and be just down the bar from three punks, a hipster, a retired guy, and seven confused sorority girls. And no one gives a shit.

  113. 113.

    lamh35

    @ruemara: oh yeah, The Cupid Shuffle. Believe u me, they prob played that too after I left. At the very least, they are gonna play it at EVERY wedding reception.

  115. 115.

    MomSense

    Random hipster joke.

    Why was the hipster’s mouth so burnt?

    He ate food before it was cool.

  117. 117.

    srv

    @Suffern ACE: Um, no. What pisses us off is wherever we go, they follow and infest the place. And then rents go up 2X.

    It took me awhile, but I get where Heller was going with Chief White Halfoat.

    It is hysterical to see the hipsters and trustafarians get pushed out by the richsters and all the butt-hurt they have about it. Woah unto them.

  118. 118.

    MikeJ

    @srv:

    What pisses us off is wherever we go, they follow and infest the place. And then rents go up 2X.

    Grenwich Village was a a cheap neighborhood until Bob Dylan and all those folkies and beatniks moved in.

  121. 121.

    Suffern ACE

    @Ultraviolet Thunder: While a lot of it is of necessity, I give them credit for trying to hold on and keep us at bay while they fix what they can. I mean, older folks kind of ruined a lot of things for them. We ruined beer, TV, movies, bikes, international pillow fight day, food, the air, affordable college, cheese, video games, cocktail hour, Santa Con…

  123. 123.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @MomSense: Okay, that’s hilarious. And has been true of whatever hipsters are/have been called in every incarnation including yuppies, dandies, hep cats, swingers, flappers, fops, precieux, Romantics (Best Black Adder joke, IMHO: “There’s nothing intellectual about running around Italy in a big shirt trying to get laid”), baby boomers, Gen X, Gen Y, Millenials and on and on and on round the world and throughout history since the first generation of Neanderthals who lived long enough to tell the next generation to get off their lawn.

  124. 124.

    Bruce S

    @Tiny Tim:

    John Cole, John McCain…whatever.

    I live in West Oakland and I have to say that, given the energy, creativity and entrepreneurial spirit hipster kids have brought to our fraught city in recent years, hipster-hate is just a fucking lazy and ridiculous affectation of old farts, many of whom – like middle-class academics – actually ARE entitled at the public’s expense IMHO.

  125. 125.

    Keith G

    @Tiny Tim: Thanks, you saved me the trouble of a longer comment. Let me just add..

    I am quite sure of at least two basic divisions: The hipster as fashion choice; And the hipster as this is the best lifestyle I can buy into choice…because many of the ornaments and rituals can be inexpensive.

  126. 126.

    FlipYrWhig

    @MomSense:

    Why was the hipster’s mouth so burnt?
    __
    He ate food before it was cool.

    OK, that’s funny in a nerd-tastic way.

  127. 127.

    Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason

    @dance around in your bones:

    India print bedspreads

    I’d forgotten all about those. Draped from your dorm room ceiling to cover up the shitty acoustic tile. Hanging in the middle of the room to separate the bunk beds from the desks. Pinned up against a wall to cover up the dull dull dull beige paint.

  131. 131.

    Anne Laurie

    @Rosie Outlook:

    Lately I have been inundated with catalogs selling very expensive clothes marketed to black women.

    Are you a wearer of “plus sized” garments? The marketing drones seem to believe any American plus-sized woman who shops by mail must be AA, Latino, or otherwise looking for outfits that aren’t muumuus, jeggings, or sweatshirts emblazoned ASK ME ABOUT MY GRANDKIDS!

  132. 132.

    Baud

    @FlipYrWhig:

    The macaronis were precursor to the dandies, who far from their present connotation of effeminacy came as a more masculine reaction to the excesses of the macaroni.

    For as long as I read and write the English language, I will never see or compose a more sublime sentence.

  133. 133.

    Mnemosyne

    @FlipYrWhig:

    I confess — I freakin’ love that song. It cracks me up every single time. And I like that he sneaks the message into the middle where he points out to his friends that six other people in the same club are weaing the $50 t-shirt they’re telling him he “should” be wearing.

  134. 134.

    dance around in your bones

    @Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason: Fashioned into skirts and ponchos and drawstring tank tops and and and….

    I worked at a UN store in Old Town ABQ back in the day and used to shoplift the things. Also, Cost Plus or Pier One in San Francisco was like the golden portal to all things hippie-ish. Brass bells included. (Though I think it used to be called something else, which I cannot remember now due to incipient old-timer’s disease).

    I can still smell the patchouli.

  135. 135.

    FlipYrWhig

    @Baud: @Omnes Omnibus: Nice! “Macaroni” as a culture comes up, of course, in Yankee Doodle: he’s such a dumb hick that he stuck a feather in his cap and called it macaroni. Pfft, that’s like buying a brand new Atari logo T-shirt.

  139. 139.

    trollhattan

    @Bruce S:

    Oddly enough, a couple decades back that same charge was being leveled at Bay Area gheys. “Maybe fabulous, but they’re raising the rents for EVERYBODY.”

    Just sayin’.

  141. 141.

    Mnemosyne

    @FlipYrWhig:

    That pretty much came across in the video even though I don’t speak a word of Korean. From what I’ve heard, the guy is pretty much the South Korean equivalent of Eminem and does a lot of satirical songs. Apparently the title of his last album best translates as “Now I’m An Old Fart.”

  143. 143.

    dance around in your bones

    @PIGL: Hahahaha!

    The scent does linger.

    ETA: I have seen India print bedspreads for sale at the Indian stall on State St in Santa Barbara. Not for $50 though. Although I HAVE seen t-shirts for $69 bucks in some stores there, which made me kinds gag.

  144. 144.

    PIGL

    @dance around in your bones: In fact, I love the scent of patch in small doses…reminds me of unobtainably glamorous and slightly older women I knew in my teenage years, the mid-to-late 70s.

    Historical note, in High School, our peer group identified as “freaks” not “hippies”…

  145. 145.

    Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason

    @dance around in your bones: Pier One rings a bell, but for the life of me I can’t remember where we bought those things. It wouldn’t have been the mall; there must have been at least one hippie-oriented place in Claremont. Besides the Folk Music Center (still there!).

  146. 146.

    Dexter's new approach

    I live in one of the “most hipster” neighborhoods in the US according Huffington, Wicker Park Chicago. That’s 5 years behind the times as most have moved on to cheaper/more dangerous hoods. Douche bags and women with huge Gucci Sunglasses have replaced them. It is not a good trade.

    People can find reasons hate on any group, but I have no problem with Hipsters; they’re a personable, peaceful, creative, intelligent bunch (they are about as far from Wingnut as you can get.) Some of the stereotypes I’ve seen here are ham-fisted and mostly off-target from my experience.

    Disclosure: I ride a hipster-like single speed 80’s era Peugeot daily, and I love it.

  147. 147.

    Anne Laurie

    @Narcissus:

    Maybe Cole the girl paid off Cole. That would make sense.

    If you were a normal lady, wouldn’t you take out a payday loan to avoid being publicly associated with… this bunch?

  148. 148.

    Original Lee

    The only problem I have with hipsters fucking everywhere is that I wish they’d find a room first.

  149. 149.

    Marcelo

    I work for a really worthy nonprofit in Austin that serves thousands of kids a year, giving them really amazing arts education and life skills. We employ LOTS of Austin hipsters. One thing I’ve found is that Austin hipsters, unlike, say, LA hipsters who are far more trustafarian and more about image, status, and lifestyle, are CRAZY industrious. They are much more into building cool things, having passionate projects and hobbies, moving to Austin because they like the vibe here, because they specifically don’t want to be in the rat race in a place like LA or NYC. The hipsters I know hold art gallery sales for young kids to raise money for their schools and for charities. They work tirelessly building their own businesses (like Franklin BBQ, hipster built) and adding to the community. They not only brew their own beer, they then open up breweries and build them into careers. They take in as much of Austin and assimilate themselves decently well. They’re here BECAUSE of Texas, not to take the Texas out. They are MAKERS, above all else. Not to mention that they are among the most progressive, socially conscious and active people in the community.

    There are a lot of legit concerns about Austin’s growth, whether such a geographically small city can deal with the massive influx of people, what it means for the city’s minority populations and how the already segregated geography will change as well-meaning starving artists still manage to price out minority families on the east side (who move out further east to places like Del Valle and Manor) while millionnaire lofts and Westlake mansions continue to expand ever westward. I think people don’t just blindly move in and damn the consequences. They’re just trying to make a life for themselves as best they can, following their ejection from an American identity that didn’t have a place for them.

    There are also many questions about what the identity of this new Austin will be – it seems fitting that Leslie, a beloved Austin icon and common sight in the “old” Austin, passed away just as everyone started moving here and the lofts started building, etc. But it should be noted that Austin has struggled with this identity for a LONG time. For every disgruntled libertarian stoner in South Austin, there’s probably a gaggle of Hispanic families who can write epic tomes about displacement and invisible identity. It’s not like the hipster influx is doing anything that all the other white people complaining about hipsters did to this city fifty years ago. This shit has been going down for ages, and the hipster influx is just another chapter in a long and involved story going back over a century, full of communities far more native and far less visible, with greater claims to the title of “old Austin” or “real Austin” than the John Mackeys of the world.

    Tangentially I wonder at what critical mass does hipsterism become mainstream. If there are hipsters everywhere, then they technically can’t be hipsters, because what defines hipsterdom to me includes (at least partially) a certain type of cultural minority status, the idea that they are not in the mainstream. At what point does being a hipster as we know it today just mean you’re wearing the popular fashion of the time and living the typical American life as we know it?

  150. 150.

    dance around in your bones

    @PIGL: I went to Berkeley High School for a few brief months in 1969 and the entire place REEKED of patchouli. I can take it in small doses.

    @Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason: I think Cost Plus in the Fisherman’s Wharf area was the original one? I remember a gigantic warehouse kind of place filled with exotic and relatively cheap goods from around the world. So, hippie heaven.

  151. 151.

    Anne Laurie

    @Tiny Tim:

    They’re pretty much the most harmless, least threatening, most talented, most educated, least bullying, most interesting young people movement we’ve seen in a long time. If you’re hating on hipsters it’s because you’re annoyed that young people are on your lawn.

    We’re bonding, young dude. Bitching about Kids These Days for entertainment goes back to the days when ‘people’ were still separating out from ‘apes’. Heck, there are dogs who age-bond, probly cuz they’ve spent too long hanging out with humans!

  152. 152.

    magurakurin

    @dance around in your bones:

    Jeebus, a fixie sounds like a stupid excuse for a bike.

    I spent a number of years in Portland, Oregon some years back as a bike commuter. Didn’t have a car. It is a battle getting any kind of respect from the motorists.

    Lots of people work hard, follow the rules and try to earn respect on the roadways for bicycles. Assholes that ride around on bikes with no brakes send the whole process back 20 years. Anyone riding a fixie needs to go fuck themselves with rusty farm tools. Repeatedly. In public. But I mean that in a nice way.

  153. 153.

    dance around in your bones

    @magurakurin: I rode a bike around Amsterdam when I was pregnant (up to the day I gave birth), toting a friend’s 3 yr old on the handlebars (in a child seat) and stashing groceries in the saddlebags.

    Later rode a bike to work and back in SoCal (riding up the hill between two stone walls on the way home – in the dark – and with no bike path or shoulders was always fun)….

    I always did my best to follow all road rules, make myself visible to oblivious car drivers, and generally try to keep myself safe. Since I never died whilst riding a bike, I guess I was successful.

    My husband almost died riding his motorcycle home when some old lady turned across the road right in front of him, distracted by the flashing lights of a police car on the other side of the road.

    The funny thing is that he’d just come from visiting me at work, had bought a 6-pack to take home (hadn’t drunk any of it yet) so it exploded on contact with the road when he ‘laid down’ his bike. When the cops got to him he said “I didn’t even hit my head, right?” whereupon they told him his helmet was bouncing across the road like a ping pong ball.

    Plus they thought he was drunk because of the overwhelming smell of beer from his backpack.

    I don’t even know why I am telling these stories. Bored, I guess.

    ETA: Yeah, fixies sound like a poor excuse for a bike. No control!

  154. 154.

    PurpleGirl

    @Gin & Tonic: More important; does the woman like animals. If a relationship with JC is to go anywhere, the woman must like animals. I don’t see him giving up the animals.

  155. 155.

    JustRuss

    @Mnemosyne:

    the recent Bicycle Times magazines had a guy’s tale of his friend’s encounter with a fixie where his pant leg got stuck and basically ripped his pants mostly off while completely bollixing up the chain.

    I built a fixie a couple years ago, on its inaugural ride I got about a block and half before that happened to me. I did put a front brake on the thing, so I’d like to think I’m not a complete idiot.

  156. 156.

    John Revolta

    Fixies were originally made to be ridden in the six-day bicycle races back in the ’20s. These were held indoors, on a banked oval track. You didn’t really need brakes. Riding them anywhere else is silly at best and suicidal at worst.

    When I was bike messengering in NYC in the ’80s and ’90s there was always some guy who decided he was going to use one for work. The ones who weren’t killed or maimed still gave them up fairly quickly.

  159. 159.

    John Revolta

    Also too, you didn’t need gears either. I can’t imagine riding around in a city with actual hills on these things.

  161. 161.

    Sideshow Bill

    @John Cole: RAinbow Cattle company? It was always great during SXSW to watch the country acts and assorted followers parade into a lesbian bar.

    Head to Ironworks or way out to the Saltlick in dripping springs for better BBQ. (Skip the one on 360, it’s not the same with a liquor license)

    And this woman you’ve met? Details!

  162. 162.

    Sideshow Bill

    @FlipYrWhig: The original slackers are long gone, the dot-com bubble priced them out… And the continued building of condo’s and high rises makes me miss the mid 90’s Austin whenever I’m back.

  163. 163.

    dance around in your bones

    @Redshirt:

    Wow! How did anyone survive pre-1990′s? The past seems like a non-stop deathtrap.

    Beats the hell out of me. Somehow we just did.

  164. 164.

    Suzanne

    This thread is making me off because I was born in 1980 and have actually been called a hipster on occasion, which always makes me smile. But the complaint that I have with the subculture is that all the people I know who I would consider members of that subculture are in fact trust-fund revolutionaries, playing with Mom and Dad’s money while acting like they are arbiters of taste. They’re all very nice people, but my husband and I grew up working-class, and find that lifestyle pretty shallow and hedonistic, despite the pretentions to intellectualism.

    ETA: making me SMILE

  166. 166.

    dance around in your bones

    @Suzanne:

    I initially read that as pissed off (missing word)and that made me smile :)

    Hipsters! Like I said above, that makes me think of finger-snapping beret-clad poets in a smoke-filled bar, reading their poetry to a cynical crowd. Who finger-snap back in a desultory fashion if they kinda like the poem.

  167. 167.

    Dexter's new approach

    @John Revolta:
    When I was bike messengering in NYC in the ’80s and ’90s there was always some guy who decided he was going to use one for work. The ones who weren’t killed or maimed still gave them up fairly quickly.

    I tried a fixie, loved how it looked by people that could really ride them, They have a certain pace that’s alluring. But it’s crazy hard and dangerous unless you are an A+ rider. Why would you not want control over your pedal position in the city? Or hand brakes?

  168. 168.

    Dexter's new approach

    @JustRuss: My fixie is a converted Peugot, and indeed, they are awesome old bikes.

    My best bike ever. Simple solid frame but still light enough. No shifters or de-railers or multiple gears; I’ve become one with it. And no one wants to steal it.

  169. 169.

    John Revolta

    That’s interesting. I rode an old Peugot 3-speed that somebody gave me when I first started messengering. It looked like a piece of crap, which was a feature not a bug, and I took off most of the identifying marks to keep it incognito. It was light(ish) and strong, and though it was probably 20 ye

  170. 170.

    John Revolta

    *ahem* 20 years old when I got it, it lasted me a good long time…………

  171. 171.

    Adam Jonas Waldorf

    What’s with the hipster disdain? The stereotypical hipster look comprises many different personality types, but usually pleasant in my experience. Plus there are hipsters that don’t dress the part. Plus and most importantly, any rock band worth a crap is going to be comprised entirely of hipsters. Not that term even really means anything. Yeesh.

  172. 172.

    Adam Jonas Waldorf

    What’s with the hipster disdain? The stereotypical hipster look comprises many different personality types, but usually pleasant in my experience. Plus there are hipsters that don’t dress the part. Plus, and most importantly, any rock band (whether now or throughout history) worth a crap is going to be comprised entirely of hipsters. Not that that term even really means anything. Yeesh.

    Bigotry towards any group doesn’t look good on you, Mr. Cole.

  176. 176.

    dexwood

    Talk about late to the party… hey, I’d rather mingle with hipsters than frat boys any day.

  177. 177.

    nastybrutishntall

    Gorram youngsters with their crazy hair and shabby clothes and alternative lifestyles. Put em against the wall and shoot em. Gorram “vegans” riding silly bicycles, being friendly with queers and shopping at thrift stores instead of Target and Pier 1 like normal Americans, being all young and thin and attractive and full of life-essence and awful.

  178. 178.

    Treefrogjohn

    I missed you by a week at Stubbs. I live in Austin and probably do the Sunday Gospel Brunch 2-3 times a year, usually when out-of-towners are visiting. The place is always a hit. I’m surprised you didn’t mention the “Make Your Own Bloody Mary Bar”. Totally agree with you about the spinach enchiladas. They are a hit. I’d love to know how they get so spicy.

  179. 179.

    Matt Smith

    @SideshowBill: Rainbow Cattle Company is long gone, I’m afraid. These days, the gay country bar is Rusty’s on 7th St. I don’t know much about it, except they have karaoke on Thursdays. I went once and it was dead, which meant the karaoke rotation was incredibly short.

  180. 180.

    oakley frogskins

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