Ed at Gin & Tacos shares the heartwarming* story about a man who changed his life — or at least his tip-calculating behavior:
… Let’s call him Chad. Chad was the typical ex-fratboy in his late twenties, all spray tanner and tacky Ed Hardy shirts covering his now-ample gut. A few years out of some undoubtedly expensive MBA program, Chad carried himself like a Very Important Person. But he clearly wasn’t one. The conversation (he loved talking about himself, naturally) indicated that he had some sort of low-level, demeaning job that he considered beneath him. His manner of speaking to the bartender and waitress was a combination of how you’d picture Mitt Romney speaking to his lawn maintenance workers and how Maxim magazine would recommend sizing up one’s next rape victim. When the bartender suggested he knock it off, does anyone care to guess what Chad did next?
Yes, he loudly demanded to see “the manager.”…
I’ve never worked in the service industry. I got a job doing janitorial work at the park district when I was 15 and skipped the McDonald’s/Chili’s/Fast Food rite of passage. Accordingly, I have no first hand experience with how awful people can be in that environment. Watching Chad was an important revelation for me. I saw him and understood immediately all of the stories I’ve heard from service industry employees over the years. I realized how many Chads there are in this country – self-styled Important people who aren’t important at all. He’s spent his whole life envisioning himself as one of the big shots, one of the people who hires and fires and takes orders from no one. But now that he has entered the real world he’s not hiring or firing anyone, and he takes orders from everyone. He’s nobody and nothing…
*i.e., heartburn-inducing
It’s a lovely, sunny spring afternoon in this corner of New England, which means I can see just how much cleanup work needs to be done in the yard. Maybe I’ll just take a nap, instead.
khead
Read this on Friday. All I can say is that once I met my wife – who has a brother in the restaurant industry – I came around to being a good tipper pretty quickly. Chad, of course, is a douchebag.
raven
I unloaded two pickup loads of mulch, ran them down th ehill and out it out where the boss told me. My butt is draggin!
raven
Since I never knew Ed when he was here I can’t really say I miss him but I wish I would have met him.
Ronzoni Rigatoni
@raven: The main reason I sold my pick-up. Compact cars do not hold a whole lot of mulch.
MattF
@khead: I think your experience is what normally happens– start out relatively ignorant, then either get work in the service industry or get to know someone in the industry. But then– here we have Chad– who somehow missed out on that very common experience. How do you think that happened?
raven
@Ronzoni Rigatoni: Ha, the only way I talked the princess into the new 350 was to promise it was a garden vehicle first and foremost. I used to just back it up and unload it in a pile but, with her back situation, I’ve got to do more.
Yutsano
I’m in a positively Whovian humour. I’m not entirely certain, but I think I just watched the part of the series where they announce good and long they’re not just a kid’s show anymore. And it happens earlier than I thought.
Dave
Reminds me of Dave Barry’s line, “a person who is nice to you and rude to the waiter is not a nice person.” It is said that it never fails, and in my experience that is true.
raven
“WC Fields spent his last weeks in a hospital, where a friend stopped by for a visit and caught Fields reading the Bible. When asked why, Fields replied, “I’m checking for loopholes”
Scott S.
I read the NotAlwaysRight.com website once every day or two, and it’s generally a colossal education. There are some customers out there who really kinda deserve to get stuffed in an oil drum and dumped into the ocean…
raven
@Yutsano: Quadrophenia?
Kristine
@Yutsano:
Looking forward to it, as well as the first ep of ORPHAN BLACK. That’s been getting great reviews.
quannlace
I have. And can attest that the ones with the most money are the worst tippers. And trouble, combined.
****
A bit off topic, but young actresses can be a pain as well.
Villago Delenda Est
Kicking this guy Chad in the balls, repeatedly, might, just might, eventually, cause a change in his behavior.
Even if it does not, you get the satisfaction of kicking him in the balls.
raven
@Kristine: Oh, that Who.
raven
Call the Midwife starts tomorrow night!
Yutsano
@Kristine: Gonna watch it with my dad after steaks tonight. I know why I left my old job and came to the IRS, but there are times I question moving so far away from my folks. Even with the sequester it’s decent money though.
raven
@Yutsano: Is he visiting you or the other way around?
scav
@Yutsano: gggrrrrr. Entirely benign undying jealousy, with sharp edges. I’m nowhere near able to pay for Who.
Yutsano
@raven: I’m on the ranch. My parents have a peacock now! This place is turning into a menagerie I swear!
@scav: I watched it on Netflix Instant. It really is the best 8 bucks I spend.
c u n d gulag
Having worked as a bartender for years in NY City and Upstate NY, and knowing many waiter pesons, I still don’t understand why the Chad’s of this world don’t comprehend that you should never, ever, not never ever, NOT NEVAH EVAH, piss off the people who handle your foor and beverages?
I told some of the stories of what I’d seen, on G&T.
You’ve got to basically ignore me, AND insult me, to get anything less than 15% from me.
I usually tip 25%, on up.
And, if I don’t sit at the Sushi bar, but at a table, I tip both the server and the Sushi Chef about 20-25% – which, when I eat sushi, can be very, very expensive! I think I was a Sumo wrestler in a prior life.
I think I only tipped less than 15% once – and wrote down my complaints on the receipt, so the wait person, the kitchen staff, the bartender, and the manager knew why I wasn’t tipping enough – it took a group effort for my service to have been THAT bad and neglectful, if not borderline abusive!
Hey, I know it was late and you were all tired, but so was I – and I was hungry and thirsty, to boot, and you were open! AND I WAS THE ONE PAYING!!!
22over7
I’m well acquainted with someone in the food and beverage industry. Believe me, everyone, and I mean everyone, considers him “the help.” I can’t tell you how many times he’s been invited to a party where he ends up cooking and cleaning for everyone, because “he’s so good at it!” When his company has an employee function, he isn’t an employee. He’s the help.
Fucking balls. I don’t know how or why he puts up with it.
Mnemosyne
I rode my bike down to Whole Foods to buy a tiny ham for dinner tomorrow — seriously, this thing is 1.75 pounds and the size of a softball. Any BJ wisdom on how I should cook it?
Also doing a couple loads of laundry and knitting a hat that I hope will be suitable for wearing under my bike helmet in the summer. The cleaning people hid my knitting magazine, so I had to bust into G’s computer since the MacBook Air doesn’t have a DVD drive and the only other copy was on DVD. Gah!
Dee Loralei
@Yutsano: which ep? Or what statement made? I’m so happy for tonight. And yes, also looking forward to Orphan Black. And Matt Smith is gonna be on the Nerdist too, so I’ll watch that as well. BBCA all evening long for me.
raven
@Yutsano: Great!
MattF
@Mnemosyne: I suggest googling ‘baked ham garlic.’
Donut
One minor quibble with Ed, from someone who has held every job in restaurants and bakeries, from shitholes to fine dining – you really should up that to 20%. And yes, the 3% will make a noticeable difference to your server. Other than that, good on you for that post.
scav
@Yutsano: Meal, Who. Meal, Who. May need to re-evaluate.
I think S Moffett trusts kids to keep up and work it out for themselves. Possible with some kids, less so with far far too many adults. I’d far rather be an adult trusted into the Tardis than the other way round. (But I’ll keep an eye out when I finally get to Bells.)
22over7
@Mnemosyne:
Is it a raw ham, or is it pre-cooked? If raw, stick it in the oven at 350, 25 minutes a pound. If pre-cooked, stick it in the oven at 400 for a half-hour or so. Cover it with foil during most of the cooking to keep it from drying out. Glaze it if you like.
After it’s cooked, slice out what you want for supper, let it cool, then slice the rest and bag up portions for the freezer. Sandwiches, omelets, fried rice-lots of good things come from a nice ham.
Gindy51
You think food service is bad, try being a cashier at a grocery store anywhere near my dad. Fortunately he is dead so no more cashiers need burst into tears from his abuse.
He used to walk up to the register, put all his crap on the belt drive and nit pick about every price he thought wasn’t what it should have been. If they didn’t do what he said, he’d verbally abuse them and walk out, leaving all the groceries sitting at the register.
I can’t tell you how many times I dragged him out of the store and later went back to apologize profusely to the weeping clerks. It certainly shaped my views on those who served me. I vowed to NEVER, EVER treat anyone like that ever, not even if they deserved it. I make a special effort to be nice and compliment cashiers on their jewelry, hair, whatever. Just something to make their day better and to make up for the shit my dad threw at so many of them.
Why didn’t I stop him at 14 I was still living in his house, could not drive and had to follow his rules. Once I was old enough to drive I took over the shopping chores, the cashiers were safe until I went off to college…
I hate rude people almost as much as liars.
My dad was a registered Republican from day one.
Mustang Bobby
I waited tables in grad school. I was a theatre student, so it’s part of the course study. It was at my partner’s mom’s diner in a small town in Colorado on the way to Rocky Mountain National Park. I had good tippers; usually people close to my own age and income level, and I had rotten tippers; usually tourists on their way through who thought that being a big city asshole to us podunkers was funny. The worst, of course, were the Religious Right who left bible tracts. The owner chased one out into the street while waving a gravy ladle and told them to get the eff outta town.
One day, Gov. Roy Romer stopped in on his way to somewhere. He was traveling with an aide in his Chrysler LeBaron. He stopped in, got two coffees and sweet rolls and told me to keep the change from a ten. Since the bill came to about $3 (this was in the late ’80’s), I thanked him and he said “You’re welcome. Nice place you have here.”
Maude
@Yutsano:
Is there a peahen? Peacocks are great. Except when they screech. I like watching them stroll around. They like to eat.
Emerald
@c u n d gulag:
This. Be sure that Chad has, all unknowingly, ingested some highly unpleasant bodily fluids in his past, and will do so again in the future if he doesn’t change his ways.
In my upscale bartending days I never did that to a nasty customer, but I know wait staff who insist that they did.
raven
@22over7: It weighs less than two pounds, what kind of leftovers do you think they’ll get from that?
Donut
@c u n d gulag:
I follow the same rule. Mediocre service has a baseline of 15% tip for me. If you don’t tip at least that, you’re being a cheap jerk.
And people: never ever assume your server is totally responsible if there is something wrong with your order. A very non-trivial number of mistakes are made when your table’s ticket goes in. Rather than just getting prissy and blaming your server, and shorting them on tip, consider that a line cook maybe or a sous also messed up something.
Kay
I worked at a lot of different restaurants and bars in my misspent youth and I think I can simplify this.
The people who treat service employees the worst are the lowest-level white collar workers.
That’s the dividing line, IMO , because I fairly sure that at the top of my game there I was making more than the lowest level white collar workers who were rude and dismissive and demanding.
It remains a mystery to me, but that was my observation.
Thor Heyerdahl
In my meatspace role, I play management of a Canadian banking call centre. While we’re not face to face, customers say all the things they wouldn’t normally since it’s only a voice they’re talking to and not a body. Fuck why do people have to lie so much about their situation…it makes the actual hardship cases harder to deal with. I’ve become a much better tipper since I know of the front line service experience.
New staff always freak out when someone starts yelling at them saying they’re going to take all their money out and close their account – since we told them something like we’re not releasing a hold based on their account activity and history (…seriously customer 3 empty envelope deposits in 6 months and this time you’re good for it?). I tell staff not to worry about the shouters and screamers…because those customers usually have bupkis anyway with us, like to play the oppressed victim and the bank will close the account for inappropriate activity long before the customer does anything.
The customers to watch out for are the quiet, polite customers who won’t tell you off over the phone, but will one day just visit a branch and drop the bomb to some poor front line teller that they want to close everything. But they will treat you like gold when things are done well.
raven
@Donut: Don’t tips get split with the kitchen?
SiubhanDuinne
@khead: I read it too, yesterday morning or whenever it was. It so happens that I was once married to a Chad-type. He got pissed off at a server once for reasons that escape me (but that were probably pretty lame to begin with) and left a nickel tip. Yes, a five-cent piece. I know it was nearly fifty years ago but it was still ridiculously insulting. I asked him why, if he was so mad, why he didn’t just leave no tip at all and he said because by leaving a nickel the waiter would know it wasn’t an oversight but a deliberate message.
Not too many years later, I had a long long talk with my younger sister, who was a single mom raising two sons as a cocktail waitress. She really opened my eyes to the conditions and the hard physical work and the bone-crushing fatigue of waiting tables, dealing with assholes, and the stress of never knowing whether the nightly take was going to be quite enough to pay the rent or put gas in the car and food on the table. I’ve been an exemplary tipper ever since, and waitstaff at some of my regular places love to see me walk in the door :-) Not that I’m extravagant but I always tip a reliable 20-22% and then round it up to the next dollar. I routinely hear of big tables with tabs in triple digits who leave a measly five dollar bill for the server. Just unbelievable.
trollhattan
@Yutsano:
Peacock? Do they hand out earplugs now, when you visit?
raven
@SiubhanDuinne: Pick up ” Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America
Barbara Ehrenreich. Also too, on the Gulf Coast, Canadians are well known for not tipping.
“Nickel and Dimed reveals low-rent America in all its tenacity, anxiety, and surprising generosity — a land of Big Boxes, fast food, and a thousand desperate stratagems for survival. Read it for the smoldering clarity of Ehrenreich’s perspective and for a rare view of how “prosperity” looks from the bottom. You will never see anything — from a motel bathroom to a restaurant meal — in quite the same way again.”
Ben Franklin
@raven:
Don’t tips get
splitspit with the kitchen?Fixed. This is why I don’t send food back. But I don’t return for more either.
trollhattan
@Thor Heyerdahl:
Yuck, I’ll bet it’s trying over the long haul. If you’d like to experience people lying to you in person, try managing apartments. People lie about EVERYTHING.
Soonergrunt
IT is a service industry. There are customers for whom I’ll literally drive to the other side of the state for, and customers who don’t get the time of day from me without submitting a help ticket.
The Director’s secretary at our facility seems to think she’s one of the most important people in the building. No. The Director is one of the most important people in the building. The Chief Of Staff is one of the most important people in the building, the Chair of the Department of Nursing is one of the most important people in the building. But the Director’s secretary likes to be a total jerkass to everyone. Terrorizes other people on the staff in the Director’s office. Rude and dismissive to everyone else.
Her tickets get ignored in the triage cue until the day the limit expires. Then some tech takes her ticket and downgrades in priority, and makes one entry in the log. This starts the new clock and typically allows two weeks to a month for a resolution. The day before that clock expires, the ticket gets assigned to a new tech or to one of the network groups.
I saw a ticket for her to get a new mouse take three months. We get mice and keyboards from dell by the gross in addition to the ones that come with the computers.
She’s been waiting almost a year for dual monitors. I’ll get around to it at some point.
raven
We have a lady come in to clean twice a month and pay her $30 and hour. I think it’s fair.
22over7
@raven:
Sounds like a really small ham to me, sure, but maybe it’s for just one or two people.
If not, well, no need for bagging portions.
raven
@Soonergrunt: Shit CAN roll up hill!
Comrade Mary
@Yutsano: ARGH!! Spoilers, sweetie!
/runs away for the rest of the evening
Schlemizel
I always told my kids, “Watch how your date treats the wait staff or people who can’t do something FOR them”. Any person who treats a waiter like dirt will end up treating you that way too.
khead
@SiubhanDuinne:
We now tip 20 percent as a base. Everything starts from there. I could not imagine leaving a nickel.
I used to leave 10-15 percent before I met my wife. Then it was explained to me just how much everyone involved in the restaurant industry depends on cash. It helps that I never have a bad time when I go to Philly – in part because of those tips.
BruceJ
Bleah. I went out to clean up the yard today and my gas weed wacker won’t run, my electric one just spits bits of string everywhere for 15 seconds after you load in a new spool, and the pullcord on my lawnmower broke getting it started.
Mother Nature is telling me that I better leave the weeds alone!
Schlemizel
@Soonergrunt:
Not in that position any more but I very definitely do the same thing. Br nice to me & I’ll go out of my way to help. Get snotty, start yelling or or threatening and things are not going to go so well for you.
My wife unfortunately will lose her temper some times & it has taken me years to convince her that you can always do that if being nice fails but always start out being nice. You can’t go back to being nice after being angry
waratah
My daughter has a trip to Port Douglas for four days and then to
Sydney to be with family and have more fun to fill out three weeks.
She was checking the prices of some restaurant’s she wants to try and panicked at the prices. Later she called and told me she was told on the internet by Aussies you did not have to tip. She always tips well as she has worked as a waitress so I think she will have a problem not tipping even if she knows they may make more than her an hour,
SiubhanDuinne
@raven: I’ve read it at least three times! Yes, I leave tips for the housekeeping service in hotels, even if I never lay eyes on them. Doormen, bellmen and taxi drivers too.
Mustang Bobby
@Maude: I have peacocks in my neighborhood here in Miami. They are noisy, arrogant, and leave turds that would make a Great Dane get out of the business.
Other than that, they’re nice to look at.
raven
@waratah: Trip Advisor:
Maude
@Schlemizel:
On thing for young women who go on a date for the first time. If traveling by car, when the man drops her off and doesn’t wait to see that she gets inside okay, leave him behind.
raven
@SiubhanDuinne: The “Visible Christians” are the worst!
Maude
@Mustang Bobby:
I grew up near them. They were fine. kids could pet them and they didn’t mind.
SiubhanDuinne
@waratah: Yes, my friends in the UK freak out when I visit because I cannot NOT tip, even with the service charge included in the bill. They say I’m raising expectations and before long they’re going to look like the bad guys for not tipping as generously as those profligate Americans!
LT
So he saw this one thing and now totally understands how someone in the service industry…
Gah. Fuck it.
Tokyokie
A few years back, I was getting a burger with a friend after a movie late one weekend evening at a place that was run by a harried Middle Eastern couple when a a drunken SMU frat boy came in with his buddies and immediately started complaining loudly about the service and using ethnic perjoratives toward the proprietors. I was so incensed I started to get out of my seat to confront the jerk, when my friend calmed me down by saying the asshole was already condemned to living his life as an asshole. The obnoxious drunken frat boy was eventually calmed down by his associates (who were also drunken frat boys, just not as obviously obnoxious), and ushered out of the joint. (They left without paying after ordering.)
Every time I think about tipping, I think about the people running that place. My impression was that they’d probably sunk everything they had into the place and couldn’t afford to hire anybody other than family to help out, and they were probably putting in 16-hour days all so they could get stiffed by well-heeled bigots like those we’d encountered. I expressed my sympathies to them and left them a huge tip, but no amount of compensation could make up for what they were probably routinely experiencing.
(By the way, the next time I was through that part of town, I noticed that the joint was under new ownership.)
Ruckus
@Yutsano:
Just got back from a ride around the Palos Verdes peninsula, had a peacock take off and fly between me and the bike in front. Had to duck to avoid his tail feathers. Used to have them in our front yard occasionally when I was a kid but I don’t remember ever seeing one fly up that close and personal.
SiubhanDuinne
@raven: True, pretty much in every context. All of my siblings in their old age seem to be going that route, which is distressing to me. I think i’ll adopt the “Pagan’s Response” I saw on the Book of Faces recently, and when they say “I’ll pray for you” I will respond “And I’ll dance naked in the forest for you!”
raven
@SiubhanDuinne: My dad was in a Spanish immersion class that took a bus trip to Tiburon Island in Sonora. The tour operator insisted that they barter with the Indians and my old man went off! “Fuck em, I paid them what they asked”!
Litlebritdifrnt
@c u n d gulag:
Ditto that remember that video from GMA years back when a pissed off waitress in a diner emptied the entire contents of her nostril into the gerk customer’s coffee? You would think Chad would learn his lesson. My Uncle (who ran hotels, pubs, and restaurants) always had wise words for me when I was waiting tables for him “the people who mind don’t matter, the people who matter don’t mind” only people of little breeding complain loudly, most people have better manners.
James E. Powell
My baseline is 20% for several reasons but one of the big ones is that I could not possibly do the job for whole shift without getting fired or arrested for assault & battery.
Mustang Bobby
@Maude: That’s great… I wish ours were like that. They chase dogs and cars here.
waratah
@raven: Thanks Raven, she will be with my family most of the time but she needs to know as she will have the opportunity to shop and eat out by herself if she wants to.
She is looking forward to see those big fish up close in the Barrier reef.
trollhattan
Love this anecdote from Ed’s comments:
SiubhanDuinne
@raven: LOL
Mnemosyne
@raven:
There’s only two of us, so there could be leftovers. Not a lot, but I’m very bad about remembering to eat leftovers before they go bad, so I’d rather have the minimum left.
raven
@waratah: Damn! I wish I could find the Aussie kid that shot video of me catching my big tuna. I gave him my card but I haven’t heard from him/
raven
@Mnemosyne: Red Beans and Rice on Monday!
SiubhanDuinne
@trollhattan: Such a great story. I really hope it’s true and not urban legend.
Maude
@Mustang Bobby:
Sorry, but I like them for that. Purple Martins chase squirrels.
Some zoos have peacocks and peahens strolling around the grounds.
PsiFighter37
Did anyone else read this WSJ editorial written by a bitter HS student about getting rejected from college?
Incredible. Comes off as a spoiled brat who thinks she is entitled to whatever she wants because…well, no real good reason is provided. She blames everyone else but herself.
waratah
@SiubhanDuinne: I am the same. When I am Sydney the same taxi drivers who would let me and my friends, when we were young split one fare and drop each at different homes late at night without a tip, somehow make me feel guilty and so I now tip them.
raven
@waratah: When I was in Sydney. . .never mind!
raven
@waratah: Friend of mine just started at UNSW COFA.
Maude
@PsiFighter37:
There are a lot of people like that. I am always astounded by them. Must be nice to be better than everyone.
Litlebritdifrnt
@Maude: My neighbors behind our house when I was a kid had Peacocks in their garden. One night I was sleeping with the window half open and one landed on my windowsill in the middle of the night and woke me up, my screams could be heard several streets away.
Darkrose
Doing our state taxes, which means doing a second federal return as if our marriage was actually recognized by the IRS.
I got $500 back from the feds this year. Since she’s on SSDI, my wife doesn’t file.
Had we been able to file jointly, we’d be getting around $3,000 back from the IRS.
That’s one hell of a Queer Tax.
Ruckus
@Soonergrunt:
That is how you deal with an asshole. But and it’s a big but, she never learns does she? She’ll always be an asshole because while she is suffering she is not learning. What we need is a way for to teach assholes. Serving a sneezer is the same. It’s retaliation(which has it’s place for sure) but it doesn’t change anything. Assholes are still assholes.
Donut
@raven:
Depends on the owner/operator’s individual policy. At one place I cooked, a sandwich/salad place, I got zero tips. At another, higher class place, waitstaff had to tip out 5% to the kitchen staff and also kick down something to the expediters.
Mustang Bobby
@Maude: Fair enough. The purple martin story reminds me of the ones that used to go after at my dog on the beach. They would dive bomb her and screech, but Daisy didn’t even notice. My mom liked the martins but objected to “swoopy birds.”
Litlebritdifrnt
@PsiFighter37:
There is a reason the “princess” culture is thriving. Just watch “Househunters” on HGTV most of these brats want a walk in closet the size of a normal person’s bedroom and still giggle “but where will you put your clothes honey”or the classic “oh this is huge I will have to go shopping”
waratah
@raven: Your friend will love Sydney.
My sister has two grandchildren go to Uni this year. One at Sydney for a science degree and the other for a nursing degree.
pattonbt
@Schlemizel: This. I always say the tests of people are 1) see how they react when the chips are down (you may never get to see this one though), and b) see how they treat people who serve them (probably get to see this often enough).
If they treat people who serve them like shit, walk away (if you can).
My soon to be ex SIL was awful in both above, entitled twat. But was never my place to say anything to my bro. I assumed she made my bro happy. Then he woke up one day realized he wasnt happy and she was a nasty human. He was amazed how many friends and family unloaded on him after he announced he was getting divorced with “how could you not have seen it” or “we really hated her”.
techno
I grew up in a parsonage. Preachers get asked out a lot for Sunday dinners. Kids went along and yes, we were expected to behave. And one of the the rules was you always, and I mean always, went out to the kitchen after the meal and thanked whoever made it. Good lesson!
I tip like the one-time cabbie I am. Tipping is routine. But I have also discovered that treating the wait staff with respect and gratitude goes a LONG way towards making your meal pleasant. Remember, these people are feeding you. Just because you are paying for this food does NOT give you the right to treat people like shit.
And for all those assholes out there that believe you must act like a petty tyrant to get what you want, I should remind you that it has been YEARS since anyone screwed up my order so bad I thought to complain. Yes it’s true! Saying ‘thank you’ is actually an effective management technique. And it is also true that having a pleasant meal also makes the food taste better. Restaurant jerks are their own worst enemies.
raven
@waratah: She’s from Safety Bay so I’m sure it’s better. She and my friend had to leave the US because of our swell gay marriage laws.
eta I was there in 1969. We never left King’s Cross.
Ben Cisco
@Soonergrunt: Preach it!
The Move is entering week 3. In addition to prepping for the next phase, I now have to prep and issue new cell phones because an ID10T S****t rep gambled on forcing a one-off 30K payout for moving EXISTING equipment from old site and reinstalling it at new site (all of 6000ft from old site). Did I mention my boss, the head of the IT Department, is also the CFO? Next time on “When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong…”
trollhattan
Since I was knocking around Ed’s place, I wandered to the post about, yes, a McMegan piece, a piece in which she really, truly, actually typed the following:
About a different piece of gibberish, Ed pulls neck and neck with TBogg in the plunge-and-twist competition, large sword division.
Wowzers. Somebody alert DougJ and Tom L.
Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism
@Thor Heyerdahl:
That’s me, though my husband tells me that I have a gift for communicating “utterly furious and completely rational” when necessary. I call it my “I can be talked down if you have a really, really, really good explanation” face and voice.
Hadda pull that on my long-time vet a few months ago. *sad*
raven
@techno: In the Army we had one solid rule “don’t fuck with the spoons”!
Maude
@Litlebritdifrnt:
#81
They’re big birds. That would scare me to bits.
@Mustang Bobby:
#85
Birds aren’t passive. I think that people expect them to be like little feather toys. They have to feed themselves that takes aggression. They survive because they are able to cope with other beings.
Catbirds can be nasty dive bombers.
Mandalay
@waratah: Your friend will love Sydney.
From a comment on the article linked to in the FP, just don’t go to Coogee Bay Hotel for their shitty ice cream.
raven
@Maude: What are the little birds I always see chasing hawks all over?
Ruckus
@pattonbt:
Had the same experience.
Some times you just don’t see all the issues. Or want to look for them. All the blood rushes to your crotch, leaving your brain useless.
raven
@Ruckus: It’s NEVER all one person.
Thor Heyerdahl
And I’m working on the Golden Oven-Roasted Capon – was a bit lazy through the day, but ready to start it now for a late evening meal…I’m wired for midnight-5AM right now, so that’ll end up being dinner.
Ruckus
@Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism:
That’s a good trait to have because sooner or later you will need it. I’m still working on it. Been working on it for 30 yrs or so. Making some progress. Finally.
Thor Heyerdahl
FYWP what the hell was that moderation for? You don’t like G0lden Oven-Roasted Capon?
Thor Heyerdahl
Moderators – somehow wound up moderated twice for reasons I have no clue…
Ruckus
@raven:
True that. But still, when 75% of your blood supply is located in your pelvic region, what sort of reasonableness and logic are you going to have?
Mandalay
@Mustang Bobby:
There are several comments on the article linked to in the FP that say the same thing.
I wonder why.
Thor Heyerdahl
FYWP In moderation 3 times…is it because I was posting with a new laptop…new MAC address related?
raven
@Ruckus: The Incredible Heat and Moisture Seeking Missile!
raven
The Shockers are slappin the Bucks!
Ruckus
@raven:
Did you delete a post or did WP have lunch?
raven
@Ruckus: I deleted it because it was stupid.
Maude
@raven:
Small birds chase birds of prey to get them away from the area. A lot of different kinds of birds do this.
cmorenc
In my early 20s, I washed dishes, and bused and waited tables in several restaurants. I have the obscure distinction of having served as late actor Michael Landon’s busboy one night at a restaurant in Vail, Colorado.
It’s good karma to be nice to the wait staff at restaurants. I never leave less than 15% if it’s at all even minimally deserved (i.e. they aren’t totally snotty and inattentive), and better than that if it’s good service. HOWEVER, about once every couple of years, I’ll run into a waiter or waitress who’s such a rude, snotty, inattentive jackass that I’ll stiff them of any tip. But for me to do that it has to be bad enough for me to make a point of explaining to the manager exactly what they did over the course of my visit to earn this undistinction, and it has to clearly be the waiter/waitresses’ fault, not some other matter out of their control.
Ruckus
@raven:
If I let that be my guide, I would only post about once a year. And it really was OK. Which is why I answered you at #100
Cacti
Steve Alford is the new coach at UCLA?
Talk about failing upward.
Soonergrunt
@raven: Or the wrenches. Or the paper pushers.
You end up hungry, with a broke truck and no pay due.
Soonergrunt
Cleared about 10 comments out of moderation.
raven
@Soonergrunt: Think if I hadn’t been able to payoff the dude at post replacement to get me the fuck out of Conus!
raven
@Ruckus: Roger
Mr Stagger Lee
@Litlebritdifrnt: I think this said before especially by those who were in the army before, but sage advice.
Sgaile-beairt
according to cellini there were colonies. of feral peacocks, in renaissance i taly….
Mr Stagger Lee
@Cacti: Brad Stevens of Butler was smart, that place is a meat grinder, boy the Buckeyes look like shit, or is the Shockers that good? Now I put my bracket in the hands of a school I despise, Syracuse.
raven
@Mr Stagger Lee: Lil bit of both.
eta I didn’t realize what a big time bible thumper Alford is. It’ll be interesting how that flies in the land of fruits and nuts!
Yutsano
Sorry for the pause folks, but naps don’t take themselves!
So far the peacock has been very quiet. He’s a HUGE corn vacuum, but he eats it rather delicately and gracefully. I think he’s quiet because he’s a bachelor, so he’s been coming over and visiting the hens. They don’t seem t mind but the roosters aren’t impressed! And yes he can soar!
suzanne
My first job was at McDonald’s. To this day, I have never had a harder job.
I didn’t work in the kitchen very much, but the guys that did often left little…..surprises….in the food if the person happened to be a Chad. Karma, thy name is chemical degreaser in your Big Mac.
Mr Stagger Lee
@raven: OOPs I should have seen that, Apologies Dominus(been watching Spartacus all day)
raven
@Yutsano: “naps don’t take themselves!”
Ask the Buckeye offense!
Sarah, Proud and Tall
@waratah:
Even in Australia, I tip 10%. Yes, it’s not necessary or expected, but it’s always welcome and I think it’s the right thing to do.
raven
@Mr Stagger Lee: Which one, Kirk?
Mnemosyne
A couple of shopping PSAs for anyone who shares my hobbies:
Interweave Press is having a weekend sale on digital downloads of a lot of their magazines and books — I just got the complete 2010 and 2011 Interweave Knits and Knitscene collections. Interweave also publishes magazines for lots of other hobbies (paper craft, weaving, sewing/quilting, crochet, woodworking, etc.) so it may be worth checking out even if you don’t knit.
Also, too, if you’re a woman who likes to commute by bike but doesn’t like having to carry extra shoes to wear at the office, Sierra Trading Post has gotten stock of Merrell’s Evera shoes, which look like ordinary (cute) pumps or sandals but are actually bike shoes. (I don’t think they take cleats, though, so women who use clipless pedals will be out of luck.)
David Hunt
@Darkrose:
Hopefully, Anthony Kennedy will decide that you get to file jointly with your spouse next year. I was going to write “the Supreme Court,” but I don’t hold out any hope for Thomas, Scalia, or Alito voting the right way and only a bare sliver of hope that Roberts’ desire for a positive legacy would bring him to vote to overturn DOMA. Still reviews I’ve listened to of oral arguments are encouraging.
I’m a tax accountant, but I’m in Texas where there is no state income tax. Still, I don’t want to even think about the extra work preparing two federal returns for people as “single” and a state return as a “married.”
I remember when I looked up what to do about same-sex married couples after the Massachusetts ruling (we’ve got a few couples as clients that I thought might eventually make a trip to a relevant state get hitched) and found out that DOMA meant that same-sex married couples had to file separately as single people on their federal return and realized how DOMA screwed them. SCOTUS cant’ strike that bit of law down fast enough.
Mr Stagger Lee
@raven:(The Starz version) Vengence, but I am racing against time to see Blood and Sand while trying also to get in some Homeland(it is Watch a Thon week) and it ends tomorrow.
Mnemosyne
@Darkrose:
We noticed last year while doing our married-filing-separately thing that suddenly there were a whole lot more questions about our marital status and why we were doing it. I suspect the IRS is prepping for when your marriage would be legal and anticipating that they may have to do some refunds to couples who were living in “marriage-like” situations but not allowed to legally wed.
Not that the IRS ever willingly gives up money, and not that it helps you this year, but it does seem like they’re preparing for the inevitable.
dance around in your bones
Ok, haven’t read the thread yet (natch, real life intrudes) but having worked in the food service industry (started out as a lowly dishwasher, ended up as manager of the deli) I can tell you – you do NOT want to piss off your food server. They WILL find ways to get back at you.
Also, as I have said before here, the last refuge of power that many people have is ‘the customer is always right’ kind of bullshit. People can and will complain about the most innocuous things just because they can. I can cite many examples of this but I’m sure you’ve all heard them before.
There is nothing like working in food service/customer service to make you a dedicated ‘kind to my server/leave good tips’ kind of person.
eta: I got my one and only tattoo from Ed Hardy before he was famous or a sell-out w/t-shirts and stuff. My grandkids think it’s pretty cool ( a rainbow bird with a swallow tail on my butt :)
raven
@Mr Stagger Lee: Hmm, No biet.
suzanne
A friend of a friend was working in an ice cream shop in Telluride when he said Ton Cruise came in with an entire busful of kids from his charity program. FoF made like thirty ice creams and Cruise couldn’t even fling a buck into the tip jar.
I tip 20% at any full-service establishment or salon. I typically do not tip at walk-up-to-the-counter places because those people are supposedly paid hourly. Last night, we went to a place we found recently and the owner greeted us by name and gave us free drinks and some extra food. This morning, we went out to breakfast at a place we’ve been going for years, and they have comped our entire bill before if the food even takes too long, even without us asking. If you are nice to people at places like that, they remember and get you back.
danielx
@dance around in your bones:
Oh yes indeed…during my server days, I always worked in Mexican restaurants, El Torito etc etc. I formed the theory that there were people who saved up their aggression and frustration all week so they could go out on Friday or Saturday night and take it out on the hapless server.
There was/is no tip big enough to deal with people like that. The restaurant/bar/server community is one where you will hear every conceivable iteration of the word douchebag in reference to customers, all of them well deserved.
Mnemosyne
@danielx:
Heh. I once had the lady doing my manicure say almost that exact thing to me (not about me, but about another customer who had just left). Apparently the woman would act like a jerk through her entire mani/pedi and then leave a big tip, like that would make it all better. My manicurist made it very clear that it. did. not. Contrary to what some people believe, money does not fix everything.
raven
@Mnemosyne: What’s a pedicure cost?
trollhattan
@suzanne:
Probably in case one of the worker bees might be an unemployed psychiatrist. I could see him stage-whispering, “Are you a friend of Xenu?”
Walker
@PsiFighter37:
It appears to be behind the pay wall, unfortunately.
Mnemosyne
@raven:
Depends where you go and if you combine it with a manicure. Medium-fancy place in LA is probably about $25, but a lot of people go weekly or every other week.
ETA: Just checked the website of the place I used to go — pedicures start at $20 and top out at $60. No wonder I hardly ever get one!
raven
@Mnemosyne: Dang, proly cheaper here.
Violet
I know its late in the thread but santed to see if anyone knows about deep vein thrombosis–blood clots. Took a long haul flight yesterday and today I have a sore spot on the inside of my left calf sort of below and a bit behind the knee. No explanation for it tbat I know of. Everything I’m reading on DVT is scaring me. The area feels a bit warm to the touch but someone else who I had look at said it didn’t seem warm and doesn’t lok swollen. I’m out in a small town so hospitals or docs especially on Easter weekend aren’t readily available. Anyone have any experience with dvt?
dance around in your bones
@danielx:
I think this is really true. It’s the last refuge of the powerless to exert power over another person. I had a couple come in to the deli that I managed and wanted me to fire a worker for coming out from the back room “with a sour expression on her face”. That worker had just spilled a pot of hot coffee on her leg, so NO KIDDING she had a “sour expression on her face”.
Fuck those people. They want you to sing and tap dance as you serve them? Happy face all the time no matter what? Recognize the humanity of those who serve you and be grateful.
Or you’ll get the jalapeño juice in your sandwich, while we all snicker from the back room.
Mr Stagger Lee
Witchita State is just opening a can of whoop ass on the Buckeyes.
catclub
@raven: I was thinking more Horton and big ears.
catclub
@Violet: Not in detail, but just like heart attacks, the first thing is take two aspirin (no substitutes). Blood thinner.
Violet
@catclub: thanks. Took aspirin this moning. Not sure if I ned to take more. Also bought someow dose aspirin to take.
I’m scared. My leg feels weird. I’ve never had this happen before and I’ve flown a lot of longer fligbts.going to the doc seems.extreme and I doubt they have the ultrasound equipment anyway. Plus I’m here to celebrate a birthday and I don’t want.to ruin their party. Ugh.
RSA
@Mnemosyne:
Nice. My wife is a longtime fan of Fiber Arts and Handwoven (several years ago she had a piece published in Handwoven–I bought a few copies and had the photo of her work framed). I’ll take a look.
low-tech cyclist
I’ve never worked in a service occupation, but I just don’t see how clueless you have to be to fail to realize that (a) a small gradation in the tip you leave at a restaurant (e.g. the difference between 20% and 25%) will make a much bigger difference to your server than to you, and (b) it’ll buy you a hell of a lot of goodwill at any place you return to with any frequency.
Suppose you spend $1000 a year on restaurant meals, not including tips. The difference between averaging 20% tips and 25% tips is…$50 a year. Less than one dollar a week.
It’ll be worth it. Believe me.
The Moar You Know
I have worked three restaurant jobs, two call centers, and as a professional bar/club/large hall musician for over twenty years.
I am under no illusions that there is such a thing as a “nice person”.
There are absolute bastards, and absolute bastards who have been shamed into behaving decently in public. Pick which group you belong to.
catclub
@PsiFighter37: Did she want to go to U Texas?
Thor Heyerdahl
@suzanne: I remember when I got comped as a good customer. 10 years ago when I worked in Vienna there was a great donair place by the University…I went there on a very regular basis. 2 years after I left (work permit ran out), I went back. I got great greetings from the owner and a comped meal.
JPL
Anyone have Wichita State in their bracket?
Rosie Outlook
There was only one occasion on which I did not tip, at the Red Lobster in lovely Merrillville, Indiana. The waitress brought drinks and straws. My son’s straw had a dead fly stuck to it. She popped it in his coke. He said, “there’s a dead insect stuck to that straw.”. She agreed, “Yes, there is,” and walked away to refill the salt shakers or whatever waitresses do when the restaurant is nearly empty. (While I’ve never been a waitress, I’ve had enough lower-rung jobs to be almost certain they have to do SOMETHING when it’s not busy; the peasants cannot be allowed a free moment or they might begin to think about their shitty situation.). After some time she wandered past and we asked about the replacement drink. She wanted to know why he needed a replacement. Oh, yeah, the dead fly. She gave him a new straw and seemed surprised when he insisted on a new drink as well. No tip for her.
And if you are ever in the Red Lobster in Merrillville, Indiana, now you know why it’s so quiet compared to the rest of them.
PIGL
Maybe it’s a Canadian thing. I tip 15% on the net bill, before taxes, pretty much whatever happened, and wherever I am…bar, resto, café. Even when I was a regular late-night bar-goer on the way home from work, I’d tip 15%, and I was the only regular that did. Caused talk.
20% or higher does not seem needed in Canada, because I think wages and conditions are not as enslavey as in your state. But now you mention it, time to look into that comfy assumption more closely.
Rosie Outlook
@The Moar You Know: I worked in a call center and most of the callers were so nice we felt bad for them because we were not given the time needed to help them with their problem.
Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism
@Violet: I had a similar scare a few months back that turned out to be a really bad, knotted cramp, but I have been through the diagnosis process.
You might be able to get a D dimer test, though. If you can get one, don’t panic if it’s mildly elevated. There are a lot of reasons it might be slightly elevated; the emergency room doc told me he didn’t worry until it was in double digits. (Normal, according to the lab sheet I received, is below 5.)
Is your ankle swelling at all?
Blood thinners, warm compresses, elevate your feet whenever possible. Walk around when you can. When you can’t, flex your calf to encourage blood flow.
Jay C
@Yutsano:
Be thankful he’s quiet! Many years ago, what we assumed to be a quasi-feral peacock landed in my mother’s back yard in SoCal – she named him George, for some reason, and thought he was a nice addition to the landscape. Until she realized:
1. Peacock calls are exceptionally loud and piercing. AND the bastards can’t tell time….
2. They relieve themselves a lot – all over, and
3. Peacock shit is apparently highly acidic, as it was eating holes in her terrazzo patio.
Needless to say, after about a week, George got his eviction notice….
Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism
@The Moar You Know:
Which category for us absolute bastards who like to bring homemade goodies to the staff?
Maude
@Violet:
If there’s an ER, go. You can’t fool around with this. If it’s nothing, fine. If it is a blood clot, you need medical attention. Go.
dance around in your bones
@Violet: I am not a doctor, nor do I play one on TV, but the take an aspirin and maybe do the ‘legs up the wall’ yoga thing might help?
Lay on your back and scoot your bum right up to the wall and raise your legs straight up?
In any case, your health is more important than any party or whatever – if you get swelling/edema/pain get yourself to an ER right away. Please.
Yutsano
@PIGL: WA has the highest minimum wage in the US and this also applies to tipped workers. And yet Jerb Creators still open businesses here that thrive just fine. Amazing, that.
JCT
@Violet: Violet – if it’s worrying you, go get it checked. Even a podunk place should have some form of ultrasound available.
Really, a little inconvenience or embarrassment is just not a big deal as compared to the risk of a pulmonary embolus.
mellowjohn
@quannlace: probably mentioned earlier, but there is a former chicago bull widely known around town as “no tippin’ pippen.”
seaboogie
@Tokyokie: Great link on the subject from one of my favorite web comics:
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/tipping_tooting
JustRuss
@Violet: My daughter nearly died from DVT in her 20s, after a few hours on a plane. Don’t screw around with this, get to an ER. If you have a clot in the leg, it could be serious trouble.
Ruckus
@dance around in your bones:
I always thought that it should be “The customer isn’t always right but they are the customer.”
Means you may have to suck it up but only so far. And if they are really assholes then screw it. Never let bullies get away with it. You feel like shit and they not only think they got away with it again, they did. Of course that can be hard to do and keep a job.
dance around in your bones
@Ruckus:
It’s so weird – sometimes just speaking plainly and truthfully can get you in big trouble, even if you are polite and trying to help ‘the customer’. I swear to Gawd, some people just like to wield their itty bitty piece of power and help you lose your job.
I worked as a pfarmacy tech for some years, and once was trying to explain to ‘a customer’ that her insurance company didn’t cover the particular drug her doctor prescribed (the dreaded ‘formulary’). She got all hot and bothered and started yelling at me….I asked her to calm down and she went ballistic. Called for the manager, wanted to get me fired, yadda yadda yadda.
Luckily for me, my manager was cool and shrugged it off. He knew I was a good employee and she was a nutcase. I guess he gave her a tongue bath to cool her off, though. (Words, I mean).
Ruckus
@dance around in your bones:
Read somewhere today/yesterday that we have lost our civility. I’m not sure which was better, living with our heads in the sand hoping that everything will be super or getting mad that the world is doing it’s best to fuck us over. In the first case we were still getting fucked over but didn’t seem to care about it – that’s just the way it is. On the other hand now we are willing to tell the world that we are not happy being fucked over. Of course if the fucking is just in our tiny, tiny minds and huge egos then maybe that’s just the way it is. Take my latest example, I had verizon home phone/dsl service at my last place and when I moved I canceled it. But I was on auto pay and even though payment day was 2 weeks away, dog forbid they could stop it or collect the proper amount. So now they owe me $50. But it takes them 60-90 days to return my money even though it takes them less than 5 seconds to collect it and that has to happen before service starts. They act like someone in a green eye shade has to approve the entire deal first(and there is only one person for the entire company!) even though it is all done by software. I didn’t think I needed to be polite to the supervisor that I talked to because nothing will change.
It’s IGYFY – I’ve Got Yours, Fuck You. It’s the corporate world’s mission statement.