I just made a command decision, and many of you probably will not like it, but I am going to stick to it. And before you people think I am making things up, this is NOT an April Fools Joke.
At any rate, tonight is Zsa Zsa’s last night in the Cole abode, because I am giving her away tomorrow to a really good friend of mine. A local woman named Karen who I have been friends with for a couple years is going to adopt Zsa Zsa for her husband. He works from home, and is retiring in a year, and has been miserable since his cat died several years ago. They are both calm animal lovers, have no other pets except for an aged 13 year old dog, and he has been wanting a cat forever since his last one died. Karen met Zsa Zsa on several occasions and kept saying how this cat would be perfect for her husband.
This was not an easy decision to make, but Zsa Zsa just never fit in here. I love her, obviously, and she is just aggressively affectionate, but she never has felt at home here. She only comes out at night, and now that Tunch has discovered he can jump over the gate into the spare bedroom, her safe zone is no longer hers. And before you badmouth fatboy, remember that the spare bedroom was HIS bedroom until she showed up.
But she really is not happy here. She spends all her time in the room or in the basement, and it is just abundantly clear to anyone who has owned pets that she needs to be in a one-cat household. So, I am doing what I would hope everyone who loves animals would do- I’m finding a better home for her. That was always the plan- to integrate her or to find a better home, and it looks like the latter.
I’ll miss her, of course. She’s just a beautiful little creature, and such a lover, but the best thing for her is to be in a home that is HERS. Karen and her husband can provide that for her (and I gave Karen a complete money-back guarantee- “If it does not work out, bring her back ASAP,” to which Karen just told me- “It will work out”), and it is becoming increasingly clear that this is just not the place for her. Tunch, Rosie, Lily and I are a tough crowd.
So that is that. Hopefully by this time tomorrow, Zsa Zsa will be exploring her new forever home and sitting on the lap of her new daddy, unafraid of the other animals running around the house and making sure everyone knows she doesn’t belong in some fat guy’s basement all day every day trying to get away from the chaos.
I love the little girl so much I am excited for her even though I am sad to see her go, but she really is going to live like a queen from here on out. If you love a pet, you do what is best for them and not what you want. And that is what every pet deserves.
am
Tell Tunch tis better to have loved and lost…
(Seriously, though… long time pet foster here. You made the right call)
Debg
John, you’re doing the right thing. I’ve been faced with a similar situation: one cat who’s afraid of all the others, and it’s taken me much longer to face the reality. Good luck, little Zsa Zsa!
EL
Good for you John, to make a decision about what she needs, rather than what you (or we) want.
JCT
It sounds like you’re doing what is best for the puss and a lovely mitzvah for Karen and her husband.
What’s the negative here?
Comrade Mary
Sad move, but the right move, John. You’re making another family as well as that little cat happy.
Gravenstone
You do what’s necessary and best for all involved. No need to rationalize or explain it.
karen
You did what was better for Zsa Zsa. How can that be a bad thing?
Just Some Fuckhead
I told you four was too many.
seefleur
I’ve lurked here for ages and have to come out of lurk-mode to say that you, John Cole, are a mensch. Zsa Zsa is/was very lucky to have you as an interim family, while on her way to a forever home. And I’m still really tempted to donate just because I think you’re an honorable bipedal-entity who would actually make good use of the $$ that the bloggerific following here put in – and plus it will cause more effort on your part to pay it forward.
Meantime – many blessings on your cranky self. You done good here on your site.
Gin & Tonic
Vids or it didn’t happen.
Rosie Outlook
This will allow you to have room for a parakeet, two gerbils, and a Bouvier des Flandres.
Billy K.
I can’t believe you were ever a Republican – and I mean that in a sincere, gracious way. You’re a good dude.
Mustang Bobby
Good for you, John. Zsa Zsa sounds like a good fit for your friends, and you’ll always be a part of her life.
La Caterina (Mrs. Johannes)
Can I interest you in a calico?
lamh35
you John Cole are a really good guy.
I’m not a pet person, but it’s real obvious you are a good pet owner/friend.
Phoenix_rising
You are now ready to start working for your foster parent license. Because you’re putting her needs first, you’ve already mastered the hardest part of that process. Congratulations on this successful love-fire exercise.
ETA: live-fire but it’s the typo of the day & I’m leaving it.
dance around in your bones
Well, of course I am not right there with you and your animals/pets/overlords but I trust you to do the best for Zsa Zsa and hand her over to a loving family.
Sometimes it’s just right to recognize that a pet is not a match for your household. That’s not a bad thing.
Now, the $6 million bucks is or is not on it’s way to you. Ahhhh – don’t hold yer breath.
Soonergrunt
Welcome to one of the hardest things about parenthood. We always know what NOT to do–we don’t leave the 2 kilos of cocaine out on the coffee table when the baby is just learning to walk for example.
But it’s hard as hell to know what the RIGHT thing is to do, and frequently it’s even harder to do it. So many things that are so hard to do that it just sucks thinking about it. This looks like the pet version of one of those times.
Belafon (formerly anonevent)
@Gin & Tonic: I wondered what those tremors in Texas were.
Maude
Good thing to do. The gentleman will be thrilled with Zsa Zsa. She will be be spoiled silly.
Tunch gets his room back.
It’s grand when there a solution to something.
Tunch is not fatboy, he is floofy.
BerkeleyMom
Good call. Some animals just want to be only children. I had one of those and much as we fell in love with other cats we took care of at the shelter, my kids and I knew we needed to honor our current pet’s nature. Zsa Zsa will be happier.
kc
Aw, that’s sweet! I hope you’ll have visitation.
Okay, now that you know Tunch can adapt, try another one!
Mary G
Good call. Now give us more pictures of Tunch, Lily and Rosie.
Carrie
I can’t believe that you haven’t proposed to me yet….if you wait too long i’m gonna start looking elsewhere.
Just Some Fuckhead
Normally I’d be a little upset with you right now, John, but you are kindest, most decent man I’ve ever known and this place you have here is the best place in the entire universe (and I include Superman’s Fortress of Solitude when I say that, so I don’t say it lightly.)
I just bought 6 more phantom Balloon Juice subscriptions. Thank you for allowing me a safe outlet for my sycophantic tendencies.
Did I say “Thank you”? Thank you!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
RaflW
Good on you, all around. I think Zsa Zsa will be happier, and the new family will love her, and you’ll have a plenty big menagerie.
TaMara (BHF)
This John Cole is the sign of a true animal lover.
My HJ came to me when I was at his first home and he came up to me and just clung. I have no idea why, but he totally fell in love with me and me with him. His person had many animals (as did/do I) and I had a cat who was about to be an only cat and I didn’t think she’d like that. So it was decided he’d come live with me.
He came to my house a week later and it’s been a perfect fit ever since. He loves the crazy here and seems to know I need him, so he’s happy. Go figure.
Felinious Wench
Absolutely the best thing for both the Cole Household and the Karen Household. And all critters involved. This is a no-brainier, and you’ll see her at your friend’s house.
And Tunch seems to be a one cat household dude. Color me surprised. :)
gussie
You are so fucking awesome.
dance around in your bones
@Soonergrunt:
A sheepish note – when we lived in AFG we used to boil water and put it into old liquor bottles for a safe water source. Our 6yrold got up early one morning after a late night party and took a big slug out of a bottle on the table and it turned out to be pure vodka.
She has never let me forget it, and she’s 40 now.
jheartney
I was once on the receiving end of a cat re-homing. She was the first cat I’d had as an adult on my own, and she was already late middle-cat-age when I got her. Since then I’ve almost always had at least one cat in the house (currently we have two). That first cat really needed to be an only cat as well, and I was so happy she got to spend the last leg of her life with me.
She had this lovely habit of going to sleep next to me with just her tail draped over my arm. Other cats I’ve had have had other charming co-sleeping habits, but none ever did the tail thing.
trollhattan
It’s a cool thing to do; not easy, I’m sure but surely you’ll make two people and two cats very happy. Win-win-win-win.
And, you softie, you’ll miss her and get another goddamn cat within one week.
Rinse and repeat.
Mnemosyne
She may not need to be in an absolutely other-cat-free household but, like many female cats, she may need one where she can be the undisputed top cat (and probably dog-free). Your friends may be able to get a male kitten at some point that Zsa Zsa can rule with an iron paw.
It sucks to have to rehome a pet, but sometimes it’s the best decision for the pet. My best friend and her husband ended up having to give away their German Shepherd mix because the poor dog was spending most of his day crated since they both worked. They gave him to retired friends of her mother-in-law’s who were able to be home all day and give the dog all of the attention that he craved and, man, that dog is living on velvet now. He’s happy, the new family is happy, and my friends don’t have to feel guilty anymore, so they’re happy, too. Best decision they ever made.
schrodinger's cat
I smell a rat. I still think it is another April Fool’s Joke. Remember guys he was endlessly complaining about Rosie but still never gave her up. All other Zsa Zsa posts have been about what a great addition she has been to Casa Cole and how Tunch is in lurrve.
Halcyan
That is exactly what fostering a pet is all about, too. Making sure that they find their perfect home. Sometimes it ends up being the foster home, but even if it isn’t we get so excited for our furry friends when they do find something that is “just right”.
HinTN
Tunch jumps?
/goes and makes cornbread
dexwood
You’re all right, Cole. This, too, is an illustration of responsible pet ownership.
John Cole
@schrodinger’s cat: I suppose I could just throw her into a black box and forget about her.
HinTN
@trollhattan: A yelp
danielx
@jheartney:
Well, here’s one who does it – I’m convinced that it’s an indication of possessiveness – “these are MY humans”.
If Zsa Zsa isn’t happy…better to make the move before you gets too attached. It does sound like she’ll be a lot happier in a home where she is the feline center of attention.
danielx
@John Cole:
This is starting to sound like something out of a Warren Zevon song.
schrodinger's cat
@John Cole: Don’t forget the radioactive source.
Patricia Kayden
I’m sure Karen can provide us with photos from time to time. Sounds like Zsa Zsa is going to be spoiled rotten.
Just Some Fuckhead
@Carrie: Aw shucks, Miz Carrie, Mastah Cole been sweet on you since you was a little kit hereabouts. He jez shy and pree-fer to pay for his noogie so he kin feel like he gettin value for his monay.
khead
I know I encouraged bring her on, but it ain’t my house. Heh. Spending all day in the basement is no way to go through life. Unless that’s the location of your office.
Svensker
@Just Some Fuckhead: You are just darling.
garbo
While I will defer to your judgement on the best decision for Zsa Zsa, I will admit to being sad she will no longer be part of our community where we get regular reports and irregular photos. God speed, Zsa Zsa.
Valdivia
you’re such a mensch John, always doing what is right.
I was very nervous when I brought the little kitty home a couple of months ago and he and the other cats didn’t get along very well. Now that we lost Jinvah, he and my other old boy Sissu have found a way of hanging out together and Quincy sometimes is allowed to lick Sissu without getting swatted for it. Sooner or later they will be sleeping together, I know it. And even if not at least Sissu is not so lonely without his litter brother now gone.
But I totally understand what you mean about certain cats belonging in a one cat home. Hard but you’re doing what is right.
sherparick
Definitely the right call. We been a multicat family for a long time, but one of our cats never really accommodated and was constantly stressed by the others. We were never able to find a home for her that we felt comfortable letting her get adopted into, and we made a safe place for her away from the other cats, but I am pretty sure the stress shortened her life.
Johannes
John, you are doing the right thing, and I admire you for it. And, yes, la Caterina is serious. She can get you that extra kitty any time you want…
CaseyL
Good on you, John, for making a decision that is best for Zsa Zsa. It’ll work out for the best for the rest of the Cole household, too: I’m sure Tunch will be very happy to get his bedroom back.
Please keep us updated on how the little darlin’ does in her new home.
Speaking of kitties, is there any news on the little cat family – Mom, Dad, Kitten – that was looking for someone who would adopt them all?
Morzer
On the positive side, you now have every justification for getting drunk and roaming the town howling “ZsaZsa” at the moon.
Baud
@Morzer:
In fairness, he was doing that before he even got Zsa Zsa.
Valdivia
@Morzer:
if he had named her Stella that would have been totally Brando :)
duckbilledplacelot
How many times did John make the difficult decision to get rid of Rosie? Resistance to change is not solely a human trait…
Morzer
@Baud:
Silence, thou caitiff! I was trying to cheer Cole up – and you, you mangy varmint, have just totally ruined the gestalt.
Carrie
@Just Some Fuckhead:
shit, so you reckon i’m wastin’ my time?
Because ya know,
i aint got time for that.
Schlemizel
@dance around in your bones:
I have a niece who has a true redheaded daughter. The nieces husband was having a drink of Jack Daniels with his band during a practice when the 2 year old redhead would not let him be. He thought he would be clever & give her an eyedropper full – THAT would shut her up. Instead it ended with her have a full blown, screaming on the floor, tantrum because he refused to give her more!
Scott S.
You’re a good guy, John Cole.
Ruckus
@dance around in your bones:
Mom used to tell the story about me at 3 yrs, they had a cocktail party and unnoticed by anyone till way too late I went around drinking out of any glass that was set down. It set the tone for my whole life – been a whiskey drinker ever since.
John, when you have pets or kids(and you are any kind of good human) you make decisions for them, not you. They depend on you to do that. And that’s exactly what you’ve done. Made the best decision for the kitty, not for you. Except, in the long run it is best for you as well.
Baud
Did the formatting here just change for anyone else?
Tokyokie
I’ve never had much luck with getting female cats who didn’t join the household with a littermate to adapt to my multicat household. But I’ve never really tried rehoming any of them, because I only took them because they were charity cases in the first place, and by the time I’ve given them enough time to work things out, they’ve seemed too obstinate to inflict on somebody else. The males will tussle, but they eventually socialize, more or less, and, if they don’t get along, they at least stay out of one another’s way. I’m down to one female these days, and I don’t plan on ever acquiring any additional cats who aren’t males.
kc
@TaMara (BHF):
That cat is gorgeous!
Just Some Fuckhead
@Carrie:
Oh hell no! He’s gonna need a momma for his foster babies.
kc
John Cole, at least take ONE decent pic of Zsa Zsa before she goes …
Anne Laurie
Good for you, Cole. You’ll still get to see Zsa Zsa, in circumstances where you can be the “good uncle” and not just “jailor in this house of horrors”.
P.S. I sent you an email about a rescue bleg, in case you don’t see the note at the bottom of your last post.
dance around in your bones
@Schlemizel:
I had friends who traveled overland from Amsterdam to India in a Land Rover with their two yr old. They used to put a bit of Kahlua in her bottle to keep her calm during the long hours driving.
I never did it deliberately, but that one time….my kid STILL brings it up. I am such a terrible parent (hahahhaha) and on my way to being a terrible grandparent.
Despite the two grandboys in my room at the moment playing on their iPads and saying “Nonny, look at this! Spell this for me!”
Number three grandkid is currently yelling “Nonny! Nonny!” I don’t know why the hell why.
@Ruckus:
Gads, we used to do the same thing as kids, suck up the unfinished cocktails after a ‘bridge party’ back in the day.
Jade Jordan
Flash Forward one year Cole will be giving away the foster kid for hiding his fancy mustard. Old habits die hard.
Svensker
@Baud:
Earth moving for you there? Have a cigarette!
Higgs Boson's Mate
Kindle Fire test.
Carrie
@Just Some Fuckhead:
Foster babies? As in human babies?
Fuck that shit, i’m outta here.
Thanks fer the heads up, fuckhead!
MikeJ
@Jade Jordan: Pink Himalayan salt.
Just Some Fuckhead
@Carrie: I think I ruined the surprise, John.
The Very Reverend Crimson Fire of Compassion
@Gin & Tonic: The gate is displaced by his enormous gravitational field.
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
Sometimes the best thing for the pet isn’t necessarily what we want. You’re being generous to Zsa Zsa and her new family. The shocking part is that Tunch can jump over the gate.
rikyrah
you really love your animals, Cole.
good for you that you love her enough to want her to be happy
cookieinthehouse
John, Respect to you for doing what you think is best for all, and respect to your friend for adopting ZsaZsa. I hope the kitty will be happy in her new home. Maybe you can convince Karen to send us some snapshots and updates once in a while?
schrodinger's cat
@The Very Reverend Crimson Fire of Compassion: Has he reached the Chandrasekhar limit?
John Cole
@Just Some Fuckhead: Thanks a lot, dick. Because I need your help with women pre-emptively breaking up with me before I know if they are even funny or smart or hot.
Asshole.
Just Some Fuckhead
@John Cole: lolz.
Carrie is pretty awesome, but it’s not something you’d prolly pick up on what with her only being a commenter for going on seven fucking years.
satby
You rock John. And as usual, you assumed wrong and we all support you. You’re adorable though, so now I have to get that subscription ;)
Felinious Wench
@Schlemizel:
My oldest son, now 10, did the same thing when he was 2. Gave him a sip of Shiner Boch at a hockey game thinking he’d leave us alone with begging for a drink. He loved it and kept crying for more.
I’m German and Irish, and my husband is Scottish. Kids are doomed to be drinkers.
Carrie
@Just Some Fuckhead:
And adorable, let’s not forget that.
Just Some Fuckhead
@Carrie:
You don’t have to remind me. I’ve seen your boobies.
Genine
@Carrie:
Carrie,
Proposals are easy. Let John get some tequila in him the proposals will flow like… mojitos. ;-) Follow through is another matter. lol
And good for you, John. I know you don’t like praise when you show “basic” human decency and kindness. But for something so basic it is very rare so good on ya. :-D
Ted & Hellen
I love you John Cole. You are a mean old fat bastard but kind and gentle and Christ-like at heart and this is why I, as do many of my fellow BJers, love whom we imagine you to be with all of our lonely little cyber hearts.
And I know you want us all to think of you as horrid, and you don’t like it when we praise you which is why you are always posting heart warming tidbits about your life which may or may not be true, but I just have to say you are one of the good ones, John Cole.
You are the best person on earth.
Can I send you some more grifting money?
srv
John, I only have one suggestion.
Leave the gate up, Tunch needs the exercise.
MikeInSewickley
John, this is yet another reason why this is my favorite blog by far. We read about the human element which is often no damn good then we get to read stories like this to help us realize the beauty in the world.
After reading about ZsaZsa’s two day escape, I really thought she was not trying to run away but trying to figure out how to adapt to a house full of firmly settled animals.
This is by far the best thing for her and I assume your friends are close enough that you could visit every once in a while.
Even just a couple of weeks is enough to make it hard but this is the best from everything you’ve described.
I have actually worried lately when you don’t mention her and wondered if there was another event. So great and loving move.
The Fat Kate Middleton
@dance around in your bones: Put a bottle of home-brewed beer in my mom’s fridge (it was in a liter soda bottle). She thought it was ginger ale, and put it in her granddaughter’s baby bottle to take with her to church. Oh my. Toddler was passed out when they came home. Mom was so puzzled by her behavior, and all I could say, in addition to sorry sorry sorry was, take her to a doctor – now.
The Fat Kate Middleton
BTW … echoing what everybody else is saying about sending Zsa Zsa to Greater Happiness. This is exactly how we received our darling boy, Greyg. He’s been gone nine years, but I still have tears when I think of our big, gray sweetie. He’s the only pet we’ve had in the last fifteen years, and would love to have another now, but have grandbabies who are just too allergic to pets.
dance around in your bones
@The Fat Kate Middleton:
They just sleep it off. I don’t know what a doctor would do, exactly, besides report you to CPS. Like I said, my brother and sisters and I used to polish off the unfinished cocktails from our parents’ bridge parties, and we never suffered much from it.
Now, the quart of Drambuie I slugged at the beach turned me off of Drambuie for the rest of my life.
Plus, when we were teenagers we used to drink “suicides” – that meant whatever we could snag from the parents’ liquor cabinet all mixed together in a nasty brew and imbibed at the local park. Man, was that nasty. I’m amazed we never got busted for that.
suzanne
I had to do this with a cat once and it sucked, so I am most sympathetic. You’re doing the right thing. A really shitty, unfun right thing.
Steeplejack
Good on you, Cole. This is why we pay you the big bucks, to make the tough decisions (and then listen to us bitch about them).
Please do post a photo of Zsa Zsa in her new home.
The Fat Kate Middleton
@dance around in your bones: Re the
Drambuie: never, never again. Or bourbon. And I’ve never tasted a Long Island Tea or its variants, never will. And yes, she slept if off just fine. And as I write this, I am listening to Simonne Dinnerstein’s ‘Night’ – so gorgeous.
The Fat Kate Middleton
Sorry about the double n in Simone – it’s how my granddaughter’s name is spelled. And just to say again … Dinnerstein’s music is beyond gorgeous.
ruemara
You’re not wrong, John. If I can’t make ends meet for the cats, that’s exactly what I plan to do. Our pets deserve more than just to be trophies for us, if we love them, we do what is best for them.
Yutsano
@ruemara: When I moved to Seattle, I had to give up my cat Skitz. Fortunately that meant shipping him off to the ranch (he was a big orange indoor/outdoor kitteh) and trading him for my little girl. Who has the greatest crook tail and more piss and vinegar than is good for her.
dance around in your bones
@The Fat Kate Middleton:
That made me look up Simone Dinnerstein and Tift Merritt’s ‘Night’ and it was lovely. Thank you :)
serena1313
John… since everyone has already expressed similar sentiments to mine, I’ll just say “ditto” for doing the right thing for Zsa Zsa & and for being unselfish about it. Iam sure it was not an easy decision to make, but putting her happiness first demonstrates an authentic sense of respect & care for animals.
BTW: I, too, would love to see more pictures of Zsa Zsa and of course it goes without saying Tunch, Lillie and Rosie, too.
You are a good man with a beautiful heart, John.
Jane2
You’re doing the right thing. Sometimes pet things just don’t work out…no reflection on you (or Tunch!).
gibsojj
I feel real happy for you and all, but who the fuck just talks about other people’s animals that way? I’d be weirded the hell out if someone was talking about one my dogs as being perfect for them or their spouse.
WereBear
@Phoenix_rising: I love your typo!
But now that there’s a cat gap… a buddy for Tunch would not be a bad idea.
Godspeed, Zsa Zsa.
Matt McIrvin
@WereBear: It definitely depends on the cat.
We used to have three, until our two older cats died within a couple of weeks of each other earlier this year. I was wondering how our remaining cat would take being sole pet, but she seems to be fine with it so far, not acting particularly lonely or bereft. She was always the lowest animal in the pecking order before, as the youngest, shyest and (for most of her life) smallest, and I think she’s enjoying not being that.
Montarvillois
You’re doing the right thing. As someone with decades of experience with cats, one of these territorial pets at a time is the way to go.
Trinity
Kudos Cole…and much love to Zsa Zsa.
Omnes Omnibus
Tunch eated her.
JustPeachyAndYou
Hard decision to give up Zsa Zsa, but the right one. When we top-of-the-food-chain hominids take on a pet, it’s our responsibility to do what’s best for them, which isn’t always what pleases us.
BTW, I gave to the phantom subscription fund just to see the look on your face. Use it for future blog toys or pet rescue, or 1 day’s worth of catnip and rawhide toys for the Cole pet overlords.
Jacquie
I’m sorry Zsa Zsa wasn’t a good fit for the household. I’m sure it was a tough decision arrived at with love.
Fred
Good for you and Zsa Zsa. The hardest decissions to make with pets is when it is time to move them on. There is so much guilt wrapped up in the deed.
But we all know pretty quick when it just isn’t right and for every miss matched pet there is a loving home they will fit. To let our guilt get in the way of their happiness is wrong for all concerned.
Jebediah
Many years ago we found a different home for a lovely dog that had been stray in our neighborhood. We at first assumed he would live with us, and when my mother-in-law’s friend drove away with him we were both crying – but he lived as royalty for the rest of his days – loved and pampered and squired about to all her appointments (for quite a while her rule was “if Milo isn’t welcome neither am I.”)
At the time we could not provide that sort of life for him. We knew we were doing the right thing but it hurt anyway.
asiangrrlMN
You did the right thing, Cole. You want to do what’s best for the animal, regardless of how you feel about her (and obviously you love her), and it sounds like Karen’s house will be perfect for Miss Fluffy Pantaloons. You did a good thing, Cole. And, give Tunchie a sqwooooosh for me.
Anagram
John,
Don’y you think you should give little ZsaZsa another month or two to adjust to your household?
After all, she’s only lived with you for a couple of months or less.
Moreover, yours is already the third home she has known in her short life and she must be totally discombobulated because she has not had stability and security so far.
Every time she moves from one home to the next, she has to start again at the beginning of her learning curve.
I’m not sure that bringing her right away to her fourth home would suddenly make her feel safe and secure.