Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Consistently wrong since 2002

He really is that stupid.

Give the craziest people you know everything they want and hope they don’t ask for more? Great plan.

The words do not have to be perfect.

T R E 4 5 O N

Since when do we limit our critiques to things we could do better ourselves?

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

Putin must be throwing ketchup at the walls.

Second rate reporter says what?

The arc of history bends toward the same old fuckery.

I’m pretty sure there’s only one Jack Smith.

Reality always lies in wait for … Democrats.

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

Perhaps you mistook them for somebody who gives a damn.

Usually wrong but never in doubt

“woke” is the new caravan.

I didn’t have alien invasion on my 2023 BINGO card.

Republicans seem to think life begins at the candlelight dinner the night before.

Speaking of republicans, is there a way for a political party to declare intellectual bankruptcy?

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

It’s time for the GOP to dust off that post-2012 autopsy, completely ignore it, and light the party on fire again.

Hot air and ill-informed banter

You can’t love your country only when you win.

Jesus, Mary, & Joseph how is that election even close?

You are here: Home / Music / Saturday Evening Open Thread: Big Time Internet Glory

Saturday Evening Open Thread: Big Time Internet Glory

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If the NYTimes hasn’t fallen victim to a “Roland Hedley tells Middle America about marijuana, using Zonker’s lilac bush as an example” hoax…

… The video, titled “Drunk Makeup Tutorial,” is completely awesome to some, bewildering to others — and above all, classic Jenna Marbles, another installment from a reigning queen of YouTube. The episode has been viewed 14.6 million times.

While few people older than 30 probably know who Jenna Marbles is, her popularity is unquestioned among teenage girls who live on the Internet. She has more Facebook fans than Jennifer Lawrence, more Twitter followers than Fox News and more Instagram friends than Oprah. Her weekly videos on topics as quotidian as “What Girls Do in the Bathroom in the Morning,” “My Favorite Dance Moves” and “I Hate Being a Grown Up,” place her in an elite club of more than one billion YouTube views, with more than eight million subscribers and growing.

“My perspective is to think, ‘I just have a lot of Internet friends,’ ” said Jenna Marbles, 26, whose real name is Jenna Mourey (Marbles is the name of her Chihuahua). She acknowledges it is an odd kind of celebrity. She is a D.I.Y. digital entertainer who conceives of, stars in, shoots, edits and uploads her own videos — often in a single day.

Her videos are a highly shareable cocktail of comedy, sex appeal, puppies and social commentary, laced with profanity. She skillfully juggles Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube to build a deeply loyal connection with fans who find her eminently easy to relate to.

The result is more than a million views every single day and more money than she had ever seen before in her life. She may be unique, but she is no viral-video fluke. To a younger generation who spends more time on YouTube than TV, Jenna Marbles already embodies the future of celebrity.…

… I gotta think Cole is missing his big opportunity to become an internet celebrity, targetting the teenage-boy version of Marbles’ fans. Kinda taking his Douche Whisperer persona viral…

What’s everyone up to, on this Saturday night?

Reader Interactions

55Comments

  2. 2.

    Suffern ACE

    I see Cole more as the Ryan Higa meets Karl Pilkington player. We can send him around the world to do stuff he doesn’t like and through some quick edits, show the doctors putting on the casts. First up: how to do middle aged mallakhamb.

  3. 3.

    Alison

    I’m trying to write something and even though teachers and friends always used to say I was a good writer, I don’t think I’m a very good writer. I feel like I’m just slopping random words on the page. :/

  4. 4.

    Corner Stone

    @Thor Heyerdahl: I work with a guy who claims to be half Scots. There isn’t enough evil intended will that could be directed at Thatcher if you talk to this guy for a couple minutes.

  5. 5.

    RobertDSC-PowerMac 466

    Still archiving. All three Macs are in progress in one way or another. As a result of recent medical issues, I’m spending less time with the Playstation 3 and more time with a paperback book. I hate getting old.

  6. 6.

    Corner Stone

    Kinda taking his Douche Whisperer persona viral

    I’m pretty sure he has a mirror in his house somewhere.

  7. 7.

    Steeplejack (phone)

    Sitting in Dogfish Head Alehouse sucking on a 60 and waiting for my to-go salad to come up. Weird. My eroding social skills almost can’t handle this. Gave a former coworker a ride home, went for groceries and stopped here on a whim. A possibly ill-considered whim.

    Gonna finish watching The Avengers when I get home.

  9. 9.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @efgoldman: Thanks for bringing that up, I hadn’t heard about it. I was always a fan of Glenda Jackson and the more rollicking debates of the House of Commons. I especially love the way the Speaker reproaches the Conservative who tried to scold her

  11. 11.

    Anne Laurie

    @Suffern ACE:

    We can send him around the world to do stuff he doesn’t like and through some quick edits, show the doctors putting on the casts. First up: how to do middle aged mallakhamb.

    I googled. Are you that pissed off at the Blogmaster, or do you just want him to tell you where you can stick that pole?

  13. 13.

    Mnemosyne

    Still feeling sickly and getting more and more worried that it’s the nasty flu that’s been going around the office. We went out to dinner because I warned G that if I am sick, I’m going to be even less likely to want to go out tomorrow night.

    When the threads were slow, I ended up wandering around and reading about dinosaurs. Did you know they’ve figured out ways to study remnants of soft tissue left after fossilization? It’s pretty cool. Ignore the comments — lots of nutty Young Earthers in there claiming that this, like, proves the dinosaurs only died off 6,000 years ago.

  16. 16.

    Thor Heyerdahl

    @Corner Stone: Well, “honour” for her funeral was said with a British wink, wink, nudge nudge.

    If you want a Scottish take on her death – you can follow Scottish comedian Frankie Boyle’s Twitter feed. Some of his from the last week.

    Sadly many of Thatcher’s friends won’t be able to attend the funeral, as they’ve been hung at warcrime tribunals.

    I was all for a lavishly funded public cremation for Thatcher. Right up until she died.

    St Peter at the gates of Heaven, doubled over with his hands on his knees, has just finished laughing in Thatcher’s face

    If N Korea lob a nuke at Thatcher’s funeral they should get just about every c*nt in Britain [censoring is mine to get around FYWP]

    Finally, I get to wear my black suit and tap shoes together

  17. 17.

    srv

    Jenna is a f’ing riot. Thanks, I had not seen that one. TMI for us guys, but so informative.

    What’s everyone up to, on this Saturday night?

    Uhm, would you believe watching videos on compost water heating?

  18. 18.

    Corner Stone

    @Thor Heyerdahl: Oh yeah. He was gleeful to say the least. I didn’t actually understand a lot of the history but what came through was clear.
    And I agreed with him.

  20. 20.

    Mr Stagger Lee

    I would like to know, when will we see the Balloon Juice version of the Harlem Shake with Cole? Oh BTW, the Frozen Four championship between Yale and Quinnipiac, what was in Yale? They looked like the old school Broad Street Bullies, I mean they were physical.

  21. 21.

    Thor Heyerdahl

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    I especially love the way the Speaker reproaches the Conservative who tried to scold her

    John Bercow is the Speaker. He was already annoyed with Cameron for recalling the House of Commons early for the Thatcher tributes – so surely that action by the Tory frontbencher must have really pissed him off.

  22. 22.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @efgoldman:

    Glenda Jackson rawks. Seriously rawks.

    Fuck the Tories. The “honorable gentleman” who objected is neither.

    He is, as our Klingon friends would say, a petaQ.

  23. 23.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @Thor Heyerdahl: I was just looking at the Guardian, apparently a lot of people are pissed at Cameron for giving her a funeral on a par with Churchill’s. I wonder what kind of demonstrations there will be during the funeral

  24. 24.

    Violet

    The daughter of one of my friends has a friend who put a video on YouTube of her dog doing something silly. Apparently it got a lot of views because she told my friend that she got a check for $500 from YouTube. She is 12 years old.

  25. 25.

    trollhattan

    America’s most dysfunctional deliberative body might be moving on immigration reform. Nancy Smash:

    A House of Representatives working group has reached a deal on agricultural workers in the immigration bill it is crafting, House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi, D-San Francisco, said on Saturday morning.

    Immigration has emerged as a key focus for Congress after the November elections, and much of the attention has focused on a Senate overhaul bill. But Pelosi, speaking at a press conference during the California Democratic Party convention in Sacramento, noted that a House group has also been at work on the issue. She said she received an early morning phone call on Saturday from Arturo Rodriguez, president of the United Farm Workers, saying an agreement had been reached on the part of the legislation dealing with farm workers.

    http://blogs.sacbee.com/capitolalertlatest/2013/04/pelosi-says-immigration-farm-worker-deal-near-stresses-gun-background-check.html#storylink=cpy

  26. 26.

    jl

    Also, complaining about retrograde Disney Movies. I sure do dislike me them Disney movies, so I can get on board with this rant.

    What Disney Movies Taught Me
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2rT28Z0xM88

    She’s kind of cranky and old fashioned underneath the ‘withit’ veneer.

    So, yeah, Cole could do a vlog and just randomly talk about stuff.
    It would be way crankier, but probably some audience for it.

  27. 27.

    eemom

    @Mr Stagger Lee:

    the Frozen Four championship between Yale and Quinnipiac, what was in Yale? They looked like the old school Broad Street Bullies, I mean they were physical.

    Yeah! Yay Yale!

    (As usual with sports, I have no idea wtf you’re talking about, but I’m an alum and my classmates on FB are all fired up about hockey tonight, so I assume “they were physical” is something positive.)

  28. 28.

    kindness

    Too late. In Neil Young’s biography he goes on about the Pistol Annies for a few pages.

  31. 31.

    Steeplejack

    @Alison:

    Sounds like you’re in premature edit mode. Try to separate the “composer” part from the “editor” part. The composer’s role is exactly to blat out words on the page–the more the better–and let the editor clean them up later. Key word later.

  33. 33.

    jl

    I am going to spend the rest of the night fuming about the insensitive anti-mail bigotry of this episode of Ms. (anti-male bigot) Marbles’ vlog.

    How Guys Fall Asleep
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9n8wXgm6lg

    I am not amused. I am deeply offended. I am sure all right thinking BJ readers with man parts will be outraged.

  34. 34.

    Steeplejack

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    No, I meant the Joss Whedon Marvel superheroes movie. Missed it in the theater. Turned out to be not bad, but keep in mind I’m still stinging from the absolute disaster that was Prometheus last Saturday night.

    ETA: I hope you didn’t mean the Ralph Fiennes/Uma Thurman Avengers. Ngrr.

  36. 36.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Steeplejack:

    ETA: I hope you didn’t mean the Ralph Fiennes/Uma Thurman Avengers. Ngrr.

    ABOMINATION! Vile, disgusting thing! BURN IT! BURN IT!

  39. 39.

    handsmile

    Checking in before turning in….

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    This Guardian article offers some answers to your question about Thatcher funeral demonstrations and how police intend to respond to protesters, “Don’t upset Margaret Thatcher mourners, police warn”:

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2013/apr/13/dont-upset-margaret-thatcher-mourners

    Some highlights: (my boldface choices)

    Under Section 5 of the Public Order Act, protesters can be arrested for “alarming or distressing” mourners at the funeral;

    Scotland Yard has asked protesters planning to turn their backs on the funeral procession to let them know in advance;

    Tonight 1,700 police monitored a party in Trafalgar Square celebrating Thatcher’s demise attended by 3,000 people.

    Also too, read how the BBC is responding to popular demand for the Wizard of Oz song, “Ding Dong! The Witch is Dead!”:

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2013/apr/12/bbc-caves-thatcher-song-ding-dong?INTCMP=ILCNETTXT3487

    Tramp the fucking dirt down!

    ETA: Any replies will be attended to after sunrise and caffeine. Cheerio, mates!

  42. 42.

    Nutella

    @Violet:

    So does YouTube just send random amounts of money for popular pages?

    I was confused by the idea that Jenna Marbles makes a lot of money from “She skillfully juggles Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube to build a deeply loyal connection with fans” because I thought those were all free services.

  46. 46.

    ? Martin

    @Nutella: You get a cut of the ad revenue on your videos. It’s just like AdSense on this site. If your video goes viral and you get into millions of views, it turns into real money.

  48. 48.

    Gretchen

    Thanks for the Jenna link. My daughters introduced me to her, but then I forgot about her again. She’s pretty funny.

  49. 49.

    Gretchen

    My favorite Jenna video is “Junk Food Confessions”. Here’s some Balloon Juice bait: she starts with: “first, put an animal in your shirt”.

  50. 50.

    Yutsano

    @? Martin: There are programs through YouTube where content providers can become affiliates. If they have enough video views, they can sign up for the program and monetise their vlogs. Both Maangchi and Chef John (who I’ve linked to here) make six figure salaries doing this. I r doing it rong.

  51. 51.

    Suffern ACE

    Amazon has wheatsworth, but only in two packs at 500 count. So you can buy them 1000 at a time.

  52. 52.

    max

    … I gotta think Cole is missing his big opportunity to become an internet celebrity

    So people would happy cough up a million views for a picture of a hand and someone mumbling in the background about not being seen, with intermittent sounds of animal conflict?

    max
    [‘Videos for really really shy people.’]

  53. 53.

    Alex

    What? I’m coming up on 40 and have been following JM for about a year. The Times, as they say, is ON it.

  55. 55.

    goblue72

    Sorry dudes and dudettes – being unaware of Jenna Marbles is not a sign of age – its a sign of lameness. Seriously, if the NY Times is profiling Jenna, then she’s soooo last year. Which I guess she kinda is.

    Her video – “How To Trick People Into Thinking You’re Good Looking” – while totally rad, is also totally 2010. Hilarious? Yes. Completely last year after last year after last year? Yes too.

    On the other hand, if you’ve never seen – I completely recommend googling it. Its worth the five minutes.

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