Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

When do we start airlifting the women and children out of Texas?

I’d try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work.

The worst democrat is better than the best republican.

Seems like a complicated subject, have you tried yelling at it?

I’d like to think you all would remain faithful to me if i ever tried to have some of you killed.

Consistently wrong since 2002

A snarling mass of vitriolic jackals

It’s the corruption, stupid.

Republicans are radicals, not conservatives.

Republicans seem to think life begins at the candlelight dinner the night before.

The GOP couldn’t organize an orgy in a whorehouse with a fist full of 50s.

The revolution will be supervised.

… riddled with inexplicable and elementary errors of law and fact

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

If senate republicans had any shame, they’d die of it.

When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it.

In my day, never was longer.

White supremacy is terrorism.

Battle won, war still ongoing.

So it was an October Surprise A Day, like an Advent calendar but for crime.

It’s easy to sit in safety and prescribe what other people should be doing.

Incompetence, fear, or corruption? why not all three?

“Everybody’s entitled to be an idiot.”

You are here: Home / Pet Blogging / Dog Blogging / Here’s An Odd Question

Here’s An Odd Question

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Am I the only one who no longer notices when the dogs jump up on my lap? I was watching the Pens, and had to use the facilities, started to get up, and noticed that Lily was on my lap, and not only was she there, but I was petting her. I looked her and said to myself “WTF- when did she get here?” Is there a point you simply no longer notice when your pets are starting to use you as a couch?

I’m cool with it, it was just weird. I had no memory of her coming up.

Reader Interactions

80Comments

  4. 4.

    Betty Cracker

    You’d notice if they weighed 60-70 lbs. like my mutts. I’ve been on vacation all week and dogless. Can’t wait to see the fur-bearing, farting critters again tomorrow when we get home. Oh, and the offspring too…

  5. 5.

    the Conster

    When I watch hockey I terrify the cats and they claw to get out of the house. They’re hiding somewhere now.

  6. 6.

    FoxinSocks

    I don’t notice when my cats sit in my lap. One day, I realized Harley, the Cat Who Bites Me When I Pet Her, was curled up in my lap. And I had been petting her absentmindedly.

    She promptly bit me.

  7. 7.

    Ruckus

    It isn’t the dogs. It is you getting older. You noticed but forgot that you did. Like walking into another room and forgetting what you went there for. BTW it only gets worse.

  9. 9.

    protothad

    There is no possible way for me to miss the fact that our dog has jumped up on me. She has an uncanny aim… we’ve nicknamed her ‘The Ball Stepper’.

  13. 13.

    RepubAnon

    It depends on the dog’s technique: this ranges from the flying leap into the areas of the lap most likely to cause pain to the stealthy approach. The stealthy approach involves getting slowly and carefully up onto the sofa near you, then slowly sidling ever closer until next to you, and then gradually moving onto the lap (nose on leg, then one paw, then the next…)

  14. 14.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    I bet people that don’t have a dog would notice it. At least the first time.

  18. 18.

    MomSense

    My old lab can’t jump anymore. We go to him on the floor now. And now he has a fear of walking across the wood floors after twisting his hip over the winter so we actually give him “magic carpet rides”. We have strategically placed towels throughout the downstairs. When he has a panic about the floors he makes a little whine and one of us shows up to unfurl the towel for him. He climbs on, sits down, and we drag him to his destination.

  22. 22.

    Amir Khalid

    Seriously, Lily getting on your lap and you giving her skritches are the sort of ordinary event that doesn’t really grab more than a small part of your attention, and that you don’t wind up having a conscious memory of. I mean, do you remember every single step you took this morning on your way from bed to the bathroom? No. It’s just the brain avoiding clutter by not storing inconsequential memories.

  24. 24.

    raven

    @schrodinger’s cat: Yea, we had seen it so it came back pretty fast. There were a couple of 7th graders there and their parents were a bit concerned but they lost interest pretty quickly.

    Today was a big annual pig pickin with tons of the other kinds of pickers as well.

  25. 25.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    @Just Some Fuckhead:

    Yep. I didn’t grow up with pets. Moved in with a buddy who had a dog (Kerouac, found on the road) and a cat (Theodore). Took about six months to get used to them sitting in my lap at all, but at some point I got to where I experienced what Cole describes above.

  27. 27.

    Tara the Antisocial Social Worker

    We have 3 dogs and 4 cats, and I’d probably notice if there wasn’t an animal demanding my attention at any given time.

  32. 32.

    Scotty

    Me thinks you can chalk it up to NHL playoff intensity. And Matt Cooke is an asshole.

  39. 39.

    ? Martin

    Cardigan Welsh Corgis aren’t lap dogs.

    But I’d like to thank my community for not fucking over our schools. Went to my son’s last HS concert of the year – in the community park, nice warm evening. Two full orchestras, a concert band, a jazz band, numerous quartets and other small ensembles. Top notch stuff too. That was followed by the choral concert – chamber, show, concert choirs, bel canto, and a variety of other small groups and solos.

    Every graduating senior that performed is headed to college. A little bit overwhelming to realize how much effort from students to parents to teachers went into getting everyone to this point.

  41. 41.

    Cassidy

    @raven: I honestly don’t like having animals. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve rescued kittens from a flea market, dogs off the street, etc. Two of our cats are strays and one’s a rescue. One of the dog is a rescue. I just don’t enjoy having animals. I do like mine, but when we finally reach zero, I don’t plan to replenish. The wife and kids love them to death and that’s why I have this many.

  44. 44.

    jl

    Awww, that is sweet. I’m glad Cole and the two doggies, even the JR Terrorist, have bonded.

    But, I didn’t know that Cole was the type of person who ‘notices things’. I thought most of his personal anecdote/disaster posts were about just that issue.

  46. 46.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @jl:

    But, I didn’t know that Cole was the type of person who ‘notices things’. I thought most of his personal anecdote/disaster posts were about just that issue.

    lolz

  47. 47.

    Little Boots

    this place came alive at night, once upon a time. not sure why it’s so dead now, but, oh well.

  50. 50.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @Little Boots:

    this place came alive at night, once upon a time. not sure why it’s so dead now, but, oh well.

    The olds came and ran everyone else off the lawn. They go to bed early.

  51. 51.

    JWL

    The dogs are biding their time until that day when you don’t move (“Mr. Cole? He dead”) and they can finally begin to really chow down.

  53. 53.

    Little Boots

    @JWL:

    and don’t you whippersnappers start in about john. he’s okay.

    a little cranky, but he’s okay, fer realz, as you kids say.

  57. 57.

    danielx

    Is there a point you simply no longer notice when your pets are starting to use you as a couch?

    SATSQ – no. When either Erik the Magnificent or Zoey the Queen of Mean jump into my lap, I notice it immediately. When an eighteen pound claws-bearing critter starts kneading,which they both invariably do, it gets your attention right quick…

  58. 58.

    lockewasright

    I’ve certainly developed an absent minded dog petting habit in my life. I am always petting one while doing other things. Even during the short periods where I have been without a dog I have caught myself hanging a hand off of the end of the couch in the same way that has always attracted a dog to come puts its head under my hand at the times when one was present.

  62. 62.

    different-church-lady

    @danielx:

    When either Erik the Magnificent or Zoey the Queen of Mean…

    Oh, I thought you were gonna post that Erickson/Kelly dustup again.

  63. 63.

    danielx

    Indiana Pacers beat Miami Heat 91-77, which by NBA standards is a righteous asskicking….yay

  65. 65.

    JWL

    @Little Boots: Whippersnapper?

    Hell, I remember the Beatles hitting the airwaves and playing the Ed Sullivan show in 1964. I remember the day when JFK was murdered, too, and that entire weekend.

    I remember pretty much everything from there on out, (albeit from a child’s eyes until circa ’70).

    The Sixties were most definitely different. And most of the fundamental conclusions I’ve since drawn about our country were formed back then.

    Indeed, I’m the personification of the dirty fucking hippie* you still hear so much about.

    I’m even a native San Franciscan.

    *(second wave, suburban class).

  68. 68.

    lojasmo

    Dogs belong on floors. They do not belong on laps, couches, or beds.

    Dogs run and roll in dog shit.

  73. 73.

    Rook

    I’ve had the happy occurrence of finding both of my cats on my lap while I have watched an NCIS or The Clown Shows (Smackdown/Raw). Considering that about two months ago they were still fighting when they were next to each other, to find them sleeping on my lap is a complete joy.

  74. 74.

    Bruce S

    I don’t know. It’s too bad Andy Rooney’s dead because I could check with him. Assuming he wasn’t preoccupied with the question of why one never runs out of paperclips.

  75. 75.

    JoyceH

    @lockewasright:

    Even during the short periods where I have been without a dog I have caught myself hanging a hand off of the end of the couch in the same way that has always attracted a dog to come puts its head under my hand at the times when one was present.

    *sniff* I knoooow!

    My good girl died last week, ( http://joyceharmon.wordpress.com/2013/05/26/memorial-to-maggie/ , for those of you who missed it), and I’m always checking behind me before I push back from the computer. She wasn’t always right behind me, but almost always. And now — there’s nobody there! Waaah!

    As for not noticing a pet in your lap, I’ve only got one laplander, and he makes sure I notice. Liam, my long-haired cat, when he comes aboard, first he puts his paws on my chest and gives me a long serious look eye-to-eye. Then when he settles down for a good lap session, he weaves around a bit, tickling my nose with his floofy floofy tail. Which is kinda hard to miss.

  76. 76.

    munsell10yr

    I have three cats and it happens all the time. they’ve become somewhat co-dependent, so when I’m at the computer they’re trying to lay on my keyboard (except for one who lays behind my screen and is usually successful at turning off my computer at some point or another). If I’m on the couch there’s one in my lap, one on the armrest, and one behind my head. I’m so used to it I don’t even notice it anymore. Not a bad thing.

  78. 78.

    Mnemosyne

    @JoyceH:

    I’m so sorry. Our cat Natasha also died of cancer and it was really hard. Hers appeared to be operable, but that almost made it worse when we found out a few weeks after her surgery that it had spread to her lungs and there was nothing more they could do.

  79. 79.

    opie jeanne

    @Mnemosyne:

    She’s very pretty.

    We had a big cat named Tommy who was probably half Maine Coon. Looked a lot like your Annie. He weighed in at 15 pounds which is why we thought he was half. They weigh between 15 and 30 pounds. I’m not up for a 30 pound cat.

    Our Annie is “blue”. Maybe my photo made her look brown, but she’s really a gray kitty. 8 months old now and starting to have opinions of her own.

  80. 80.

    Mnemosyne

    @opie jeanne:

    People who pass by our window when she’s sitting in it always comment about how pretty she is. And she knows it, too. We also call her our little beauty queen, because she sits with her paws perfectly lined up and poses for us.

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