Grover Nordquist is a secret Muslim because he has a beard. (via)
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by $8 blue check mistermix| 82 Comments
This post is in: Teabagger Stupidity
Grover Nordquist is a secret Muslim because he has a beard. (via)
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schrodinger's cat
By that definition, are the Amish secretly Muslim too?
Dolly Llama
So what? Charlie Crist has a beard. So does Marcus Bachmann. So does Mitch McConnell.
Linda Featheringill
Oh, that is funny! Couldn’t happen to a nicer guy!
My good angel wants to defend poor Mr. Norquist because the accusation is illogical but my bad angel wants to sit in the corner and giggle.
Guess which angel will win?
[Tee-hee.]
Violet
I thought he was a non-secret Muslim because his wife is Muslim. Can’t believe the pass the wingnuts have given him on this for the last decade. I figured he’d be an early casualty of the anti-Muslim teabaggeriness.
pillsy
GOP Will Eat Itself.
Linda Featheringill
@schrodinger’s cat:
The Amish also make their womenfolk stay home and dress funny. Proof!
dmsilev
@schrodinger’s cat: What about the Hasidic Jews? Are they Muslim as well?
the Conster
I love the little “oh!” from someone in the audience because he’s married to a muslim woman. These people really need to get out more.
schrodinger's cat
@dmsilev: Doesn’t John Cole have a beard too. He must be secretly muslin! Ask Tunch.
Brother Machine Gun of Desirable Mindfulness (fka AWS)
How do we know she is a witch?
RSA
Who would have guessed that converting the U.S. to Islam could be as easy as taking over the razor blade and shaver industry?
Schlemizel
Well that at least would explain why he is trying to destroy America. He has the entire GOP on his side and is succeeding, you have to admire his success!
dewzke
I grow hair on my face and I’m an atheist! Shave now!
Omnes Omnibus
@RSA: I can’t grow a good beard and I am straight. How am I supposed to get by in this new bearded America?
Just One More Canuck
@Brother Machine Gun of Desirable Mindfulness (fka AWS): She turned me into a newt
dmsilev
@Omnes Omnibus: Off to the FEMA Reeducation Camps with you!
Alex S.
The line ‘I don’t like Karl Rove’ got applause as well. The conservative movement is in shambles.
gene108
Hmmmm….so can women every be true Muslims…as they will rarely be able to grow beards?
Also, too as every man knows having a beard is a permanent state that can never be reversed by scissors, a razor blade and shaving cream.
Omnes Omnibus
@Brother Machine Gun of Desirable Mindfulness (fka AWS): Build a bridge outta her?
@gene108:
Or fire.
Brother Machine Gun of Desirable Mindfulness (fka AWS)
@Omnes Omnibus: what also floats in water?
dewzke
This is an assembly of morons, conservatives in name only, but fuckos for sure.
Omnes Omnibus
@Brother Machine Gun of Desirable Mindfulness (fka AWS): Very small rocks.
dewzke
“Very small rocks?”
Emma
You know, if Obama planted agents provocateur too screw up the GOP works they would do much less damage than these idiots do by themselves. Proceed, gentlemen!
Just One More Canuck
@Brother Machine Gun of Desirable Mindfulness (fka AWS): A DUCK!!
BillinGlendaleCA
@dmsilev: Speaking of camps, the wifey and I took a day trip yesterday to Whitney Portal and included a side trip to Manzanar. Guess that was the evil dems early attempt at FEMA camps.
Omnes Omnibus
@Emma: This really is a “Never interrupt your enemy while he is making a mistake” moment, isn’t it?
Poopyman
“Grover Norquist is Trouble, with a capital ‘T'”. I half expected the music to come up and for her to go off on a diatribe against pool. In any event, I got the same vibe as Henry Hill put out.
dmsilev
@gene108:
That just means he’s an undercover Muslim!
Omnes Omnibus
@Poopyman:
Grifter? How odd.*
*”That was my father’s name.”
Bonus points for guessing the movie.
dewzke
Good Fellas?
jeffreyw
Kittehs just loves them some manly, bearded men. If they have manly noses.
Emma
@Omnes Omnibus: Being not of a kind disposition towards the current incarnation of the GOP, I would even add a little fuel to the fire. Which in fact may be what Obama does from time to time.
Emma
@jeffreyw: Now there’s an aaaawwwwww sort of picture!
becca
@pillsy:
The GOP! It’s whatzfordinner!
Jay in Oregon
@pillsy:
This would make a great article tag.
schrodinger's cat
@jeffreyw: Is it Ceiling Cat and Moses?
Poopyman
OT, and I’m not gonna click on it, byt what’s up with the Newsmax headline
Inquiring minds, etc, etc.
IowaOldLady
In that pic, I totally misread MB as MLB and wondered if the Great American Passtime was now a target.
michelle
@Poopyman:
Here’s a link to a NY Mag article that will explain part of it.
Shortstop
It must be so weird to shave your face. To misappropriate an Elaine Benes line, I don’t know how you guys walk around with those things.
jeffreyw
@schrodinger’s cat: Yeah, pretty much, but you misspelled Noses
Tokyokie
@Omnes Omnibus: Whattyatalk, whattyatalk, whattyatalk. Ahem, Henry Hill is the character played by Ray Liotta in Goodfellas. Harold Hill is the character played by Robert Preston in The Music Man.
Woodrowfan
Is this the same woman that a couple years ago when writing the Texas republican platform claimed that the idea of free public education came directly “from Moscow”??
Baud
Everyone knows secret Muslims don’t have their faces but do shave their pubes. So Norquist is halfway to passing the secret Muslim test.
Todd
@Violet:
Raging lunatic Deb Schlussel has been on his ass for years.
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
@jeffreyw: Bitsy! (?) How’s Katie?
Throwin Stones
@Dolly Llama: But Grover’s beard is muslin.
Seanly
Couldn’t happen to a nicer guy. I heartily approve of long & bloody internecine warfare among the GOP. I enjoyed hearing the crowd clap when the lunatic said she didn’t like Karl Rove.
Linda Featheringill
@Baud:
Shaving the pubes.
I didn’t know that.
Does that mean that old humans, as they lose hair in all kinds of places, morph into Muslims? What if they were atheist when they were more hirsute?
jeffreyw
@a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q): Here’s the latest update.
Baud
@Linda Featheringill:
Religion is kind of like virginity. Nobody really cares if you’re old.
MomSense
My non-theist, hipster, musician son is a secret muslin!
@Baud:
What??? Is that in the secret muslin manual?
Baud
@MomSense:
Page 36.
Bruce Baugh
@Omnes Omnibus: From what I remember watching Batman on TV as a child, you can do the King Tut thing of a prosthetic paste-on beard.
danielx
Of course he is. So was that secret liberal Abraham Lincoln, not to mention U.S. Grant and Robert E. Lee.
@Dolly Llama:
And so does Lindsey Graham, aka Huckleberry Closetcase.
Mr Stagger Lee
@dewzke: Put on a beret with a star on it and you can be Che! But that makes you a gawldurrned Commuunnnitst!
MomSense
@danielx:
Is John McCain the beard??
dewzke
@danielx:
Huckleberry Closetcase? noice.
burnspbesq
@Tokyokie:
But he doesn’t know the territory!
RSA
@Bruce Baugh:
Or even the reverse, like Cesar Romero, with white make-up slathered on top of a mustache.
WereBear
@schrodinger’s cat: They hide it so well.
dswagz
Married to a Muslim; sporting a beard, and trying to derail our government by starving and obstructing to the point where the US government is just large enough to strangle in a bathtub.. Imagine the scrutiny if he were a Dem….
ranchandsyrup
What about chuck Norris? Behind his beard is a muslin fist?
Joel (Macho Man Randy Savage)
And he holds his finger up like Khamenei.
Citizen_X
@Baud:
*Gasp!* They’ve infiltrated our pr0n!
Baud
@Citizen_X:
Our most sacred institution. Bastards!
gnomedad
@Poopyman:
I suspect some loons are going CINO on this Pope because he suggested atheists might not go to hell.
Dolly Llama
@danielx: Nope, Not Lindsey. He is a lifelong bachelor. Poses in Christmas cards with his sister and her kids.
Liberty60
I heard that Michele Bachmann has a beard.
WereBear
@Liberty60: I heard that Michelle Bachman IS a beard.
p.a.
The lack of male facial hair means you are a beard Muslim. At least a decade back the word ‘Moslem’ was used a lot. What happened? Is it now considered a poor transliteration? Or an insulting usage?
The Other Chuck
@p.a.:
Archaeic transliteration from an uncommon regional dialect, the same sort of thing that gave us “Peking” instead of “Beijing”.
The Other Chuck
@p.a.: FWYP wouldn’t take my edit: the Arabic pronunciation pronounces it “Moose-lim”, others make it a short U. They’re both correct seeing as how the proper spelling is in Arabic, but it’s just one of those things where different transliteration standards become dominant.
At least we don’t have to deal with the dozen or so romanizations of Qadaffi anymore.
bubba
And South Carolina is a Secret Muslim caliphate, what with that crescent moon and all as its symbol.
The Other Chuck
@Alex S.:
They dislike Rove because he’s a loser who called it wrong and they see that as costing them power. Power is all they respect.
Michael G
Based on my experience, he could also secretly be a Unix sysadmin.
West of the Rockies
@Alex S.: Yes…. isn’t it wonderful? I love wingnut-on-wingnut crime.
steverino
The pronunciation “muslim ” sounds like an offensive word.
drkrick
@danielx: in memory of Jean Stapleton, “I didn’t know Lincoln was Jewish.”
Redshirt
Everyone in America from 1820-1888 was a Muslim. So many beards.
Where do mutton chops fit on the theology scale? Too Amish?
Kib
Tebow’s Muslim beard must be why he can’t get an NFL gig.