(Drew Sheneman via GoComics.com)
Do not get on the wrong side of Judith Martin:
DEAR MISS MANNERS: The time for school graduation ceremonies is upon us again. Unfortunately, I’ve been witnessing that in recent years, polite applause and inward pride are steadily losing ground to ear-piercing whistles and hooting and hollering like banshees upon hearing a loved one’s name read.
Some students have taken to unashamedly making assorted gestures intended to elicit additional outbursts from the audience. Moreover, they are being fully indulged by their friends and relatives…
It’s all so tasteless and rude. What might you suggest be done to bring decorum back to these increasingly unbecoming spectacles?
GENTLE READER: Well, the school principals are trying, as you may have noticed. If it weren’t for all that noise, you would be able to hear them pleading for the applause to be withheld until all diplomas have been handed out.
It never works. The principals have lost whatever small authority they had left after college acceptances were received. Furthermore, they have little inclination to put a damper on a celebratory day.
Yet for some graduates, it does just that. Turning a mass celebration into a popularity contest might remind them how relieved they are to be leaving high school.
If Miss Manners were in charge of such a ceremony, she might say: “Now I realize that those of you who didn’t expect to make it through high school will be tempted to let loose and holler when you receive your diplomas, and that your families may be so overcome with relief that they will chime in. But you did make it, and your diplomas are just as good as everyone else’s. So I ask you to accept this honor with dignity, and not draw attention to how surprised you are.”
*********
What’s on the agenda for the end of the weekend, as we wait for Cole to promote this evening’s TV viewing?
max
What’s on the agenda for the end of the weekend
Rain. And a Red Wedding.
as we wait for Cole to promote this evening’s TV viewing?
And then: more rain.
max
[‘Every damn time I’m like ‘Shit, everything’s getting dried out, guess it’s time to water’, I water. Then it rains immediately thereafter. I can’t decide if this means I should water more regularly instead of waiting under soil dampness recedes or have faith and assume it’s going to fucking rain.’]
Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason
@max: I’ve had faith and assumed it would rain just like the weather report said it would. It didn’t. My poor veggies probably think they’re in the stinking desert. I know if I water them, though, it will bring on the rain, just like it has for you.
MelissaM
I’m not sorry. When hubbo got his Phd, I was damn proud and happy and wasn’t afraid to show it. Suck that, Judith.
cathyx
Everyone should get the same level of cheer, just like all the 5 and 6 year olds get a trophy at the end of the season.
If you’ve brought a large number of family to the graduation, make all but 4 of them sit on their hands. Everything must be equal, no matter what.
Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason
And while I’m not surprised that my kid is graduating from high school on Friday, I’m as relieved as the parents Miss Manners refers to. Eight years of nagging about homework is enough.
ETA: Well, 16 if you include elementary and middle school too. Homework is a curse on happy family life.
WereBear
Nothing else about high school has any human dignity or civilized decorum. Why should a closeout ceremony be different?
Well, wrapping up a week of stay-cation, which I loved even though it rained 7/8ths of the time.
The prophet Nostradumbass
For any of you who are using Feedly, have you noticed it skipping posts? For instance, there’s one here from today with the title “QED” that never appeared in the feed on Feedly.
cathyx
What has happened to us that we can’t take the slightest bit of disappointment anymore? If you’re sad or depressed now, you take a drug so you’re no longer sad or depressed. Some people get more and louder cheers than others. Some people are more popular than others, that’s life. Get over it.
Keith G
I bet she was referencing a kindergarten or fifth grade graduation. Seriously, the first time I saw a sub high school graduation was when I first really new our society was not going to get any better.
My evening: Though many months late, I am working my way through “House of Cards”. I am so hooked.
LosGatosCA
@max:
You know how I can tell which month there’s going to be rain? That’s the month I was my car.
Baud
@The prophet Nostradumbass:
I’ve noticed that. I also noticed that different posts showed up when I switched between views.
LosGatosCA
@LosGatosCA:
Wash my car
Also, too, you know how I can tell my BJ comment will be published immediately? It says comment ‘Failed.’
Keith G
@max:
I am waiting for the next discussion of portabellos and cukes.
Todd
@Keith G:
Justified is my current joy. Just started season 3.
Cacti
You’ve just completed a process that has consumed the overwhelming majority of your life to date.
Hoot and holler if you feel like it. It’s not a funeral.
AHH onna Droid
Miss Manners gets mean in her old age, I see.
I attended a graduation recently with such an audience. Didn’t bother me. I had an asshole politician on the make at my hs graduation and it was not a good day!
Will students with small families feel bad? Doubt it. Students who have nobody come will feel bad but they felt bad in my day too.
Pomp and Senescence needs to go.
West of the Rockies
Anyone see the photographs of Steven Seagal “brokering” a meeting between U.S. (Republican) officials and Russian officials? (Why do I find his yellow-lensed glasses so annoying?) Can you imagine the collective right-wing freakout if, say, Alec Baldwin did something similar when Shrub was prez?
red dog
Just mail the diplomas. Nobody gives a shit but your family anyway. I hope you all go away to college so your music stops wafting through the neighborhood.
Forum Transmitted Disease
If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stamping on all expressions of human joy — forever.
Mnemosyne
True story: I almost didn’t get my high school diploma because I had too many overdue library books. We did manage to get it straightened out before I started college.
I do kind of agree with Miss Manners here, though — if your hootin’ and hollerin’ means that other families can’t hear their loved one’s name over the racket, then you’re being fucking rude.
Also, I have the feeling that the people defending this have never had to sit through a graduation where 700+ names were being read and they had to pause after every. single. name. to wait for the uproar to die down. Try that sitting in the sun during a Southern California June when it’s already 95 degrees at 10:00 am and tell me again that there’s no problem for anyone that an extra 30 minutes gets added on so all the names can be heard.
ETA: Where’s gogol’s wife when I need her? I think she’s the one who just finished sitting through yet another set of these since she’s a professor. Unless I’m mixing her up with another of the college professors/administrators we have here.
sherparick
For the way the theocratic right simply rejects facts they find inconvenient, check out the Huff Post story about anti-choice activist Lila Rose. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/31/lila-rose-beatriz-abortion_n_3367595.html?ncid=edlinkusaolp00000003
Particularly idiotic was her statement that there are “no abortions in Ireland,” apparently not realizing that for about 30 quid ($45.00 give or take) one can take a ferry from Dublin to a a civilized country and get ann abortion.
http://www.thejournal.ie/fewer-women-travelling-to-the-uk-for-abortion-services-467507-May2012/
The story I reference estimates that 150,000 Irish women have traveled to the U.K.for an abortion since 1980.
Omnes Omnibus
@red dog: Should they also get off your lawn?
raven
@Mnemosyne: USAFI mailed my GED to me.
cathyx
@Mnemosyne: If it’s too long for you, don’t go.
dan
Yahoo? Anyone know what happened to Yahoo? The front page used to be a mix of generic news, sports and financial headlines. Now it’s links to Gateway Pundit and Sarah Palin stories and The Fucking Blaze. The mobile site is worse.
Has anyone heard of a plan by Yahoo to institute such a drastic and repellent change?
aimai
The whole thing is ridiculous–both complaining about it and fussing about it. Its a highschool graduation. I can’t believe the fuss people make about it who come from families where everyone graduates highschool. If you are the first in your family, or its rare in your community, or its going to be the last thing of note you ever do then by all means act like a banshee and shriek and holler. But otherwise? Just try to be polite to the speakers and the other students. But really, its not worth writing to miss manners about.
raven
@Mnemosyne: My diss was a qualitative study of GED Grads. Why they quit, why they went back and what the experience of preparing was for them. My “research participants” were folks who gave speeches at GED graduations. You want to see a wild event go to one of those. Half revival and half pep rally (at least in Georgia) and woe onto someone who told the folks in the crowd to cool it.
Mnemosyne
@cathyx:
I told my parents not to come to my graduation, but they insisted. Parents are funny that way.
jeffreyw
Trying to work out the best way to cook a pie on the Weber Grill.
raven
@jeffreyw: Looks like it worked.
Todd
@dan:
I don’t see those links. I just checked, and see mostly sports, as it should be.
Josie
By the time my youngest son graduated, we were a very small cheering squad. The large extended family in front of us felt sorry for us and cheered with us to boost his applause. What a generous gift that was. He was rather surprised.
muddy
@Mnemosyne: I was ironing my gown for HS graduation when my counselor called to say that I was not going to graduate, due to being short one quarter of gym credit. One quarter out of 16, FFS. I had gotten in trouble because I left the locker room early to smoke a cig that last spring. They made me a deal where I could do the summer football readiness program instead, so that I could still go to college in the fall. 5 days a week from 6-8am for 2 months. psh
So anyway my mom made me march about in the yard in the gown so that she could take photos and pretend like I was graduating. In every picture I look entirely stormy. So funny. I also recently found a similar one from 1st Communion where I am giving the stinkeye due to another bitch getting my sweet veil (I was 6).
Yatsuno
@jeffreyw: Sans green bits, that will do nicely.
Get to yell at my bank in the morning. Somehow my account completely evaporated. And it should have had money in it because I was just paid last Tuesday.
muddy
@Yatsuno: Green bits give belly ache. No unripe fruit for me.
eemom
Sheeeyit, we may finally have found something we can agree on. Judith Martin is the closest thing I have to a hero.
Judging by some of the above comments though, her understated brilliance is lost on a few others here.
eta: The above meant to be an observation about Miss Manners in general. Anyone who quibbles with people not acting like assholes at a HS graduation ceremony is a fucking idiot.
Omnes Omnibus
The Kings don’t seem to be having a good night.
Todd
@raven:
My youngest graduated HS last night. There were some cheering families, but I had less trouble with that than I did with the condescending fucking speech given very goddamn year by the superintendent about the need to keep quiet.
Screw him.
nellcote
from the Tweet Machine:
David Plouffe @davidplouffe
Strong words from Mr Grand Theft Auto and suspected arsonist/insurance swindler. And loose ethically today. http://thehill.com/video/house/302933-issa-calls-carney-a-paid-liar-on-irs-scandal …
WereBear
@Yatsuno: Is something telling you to move to Hawaii? That is not calming news.
raven
@Todd: When my brother graduated from law school in 86 at the Arco arena one of his classmates dribbled a basketball across the stage and handed it to the dean. I thought my old man was going to have a fucking stroke. I said “Dad, it isn’t YOUR graduation”!
Chavez-respecting Obamist
You know what? All you are doing is making the ceremony longer with the yelling and clapping. They’re boring enough as they are–please don’t drag them out unnecessarily.
ChrisNYC
@nellcote: Holy great. Plouffe is a scary mfer.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
Well, that raises a whole different question….
@nellcote: Did he really? Good for him. I’m so sick of that cheap little hack being allowed to play the Grand Inquisitor. In other Sunday “can’t they just shut the fuck up?” news, I gather John McCain is (hang on to your wigs and keys) totally unfazed by his recent stint/stunt palling around with terrists, and Arianna “The Settlement” Huffington has appointed herself guardian of the First Amendment.
Todd
@eemom:
That had to hurt.
Anne Laurie
@muddy:
My spiritual sister! I have a photo like that somewhere, except my evil attitude was because it was so hot in the church that three of my grademates fainted during the ceremony & one kid threw up in the final processional.
Come to think, last time I showed off that photo was twenty years ago, when concerned participants asked why I wasn’t getting married ‘traditionally’. (We opted for a vaguely SCAdian theme, actually early Dutch Renaissance copies for me & the Spousal Unit). White is sooo not a good color for an Irish redhead — I look boiled in the lovely white taffeta & voile communion dress my Nana hand-sewed!
Suffern ACE
@West of the Rockies: he has vowed to devote his life to fighting terrorism. There really is an alternative in the drones vs. boots on the ground in this fight: the visit from the buffoons. We have an abundant supply of weapons grade material in this country. But alas we will need to rescind our signature on the Luxembourg Accords of 1924, which isn’t likely.
Brother Machine Gun of Desirable Mindfulness (fka AWS)
@eemom: This explains so fucking much.
Comrade Dread
If I were in charge of a graduation ceremony, we wouldn’t have them. You are rarely treated to ceremonies acknowledging doing your bloody job in the real world. In fact, you might do your job too well, get too many raises, and see your job given to tomorrow’s graduates willing to do unpaid internship or outsourced.
Better to let the little kids know this early.
Also, get off my lawn.
rda909
Clearly the only kind of achievement worthy of loud vocal celebration is in athletics. School achievement simply isn’t that important. Now having said that, I’m very interested to see what Alex Pareene has to say on the topic.
YellowJournalism
@sherparick: Obviously, she has neither seen nor read “Circle of Friends.”
(That movie was marketed as a feel-good romantic comedy. I went with my born-again Christian friends, and they were so upset with the turn the movie made when it became about sexual temptation and out-of-wedlock pregnancy. I loved the movie.)
cathyx
@rda909: I agree. Let’s impose the same standards at a sporting event.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@Comrade Dread: You remind me that my first prolonged exposure to then-Senator Barack Obama was on NPR– WWDTM, IIRC– expressing his bemused exasperation at the fact that he had recently attended his daughter’s kindergarten graduation ceremony.
raven
@cathyx: I’d love to sit behind you at a Georgia game.
Yatsuno
@raven: I loved it when folks would sit behind me at a football game. Especially when I had to hoist 45 pounds of brass right into their views. It was fun to listen to them bitch about it too, like what the hell did they think was gonna happen sitting there?
@nellcote: Holy shit. They just redefined vapid.
nellcote
Tell me again why I should respect the msm’s authoritay…
A White House counsel known for her shoes
Purse Politics: Tote and Vote
raven
@Yatsuno: One time my mom and her husband came to an Illinois game and were seated right in front of the Ohio State Band. Better than behind but they were shell shocked afterwards.
cathyx
@raven: I was being sarcastic. This whole push to end cheering is ridiculous.
Higgs Boson's Mate
For those of you who commiserated with me about the end of my marriage an update. Turns out some good people whom I knew in days past live out there in Joshua Tree. We’re going to get together and hoist a few after I finish looking at property out that way. After that, I’ll go to ground in a motel for the evening. I’m taking my Kindle Fire and hopefully I’ll be able to keep up with BJ.
raven
@cathyx: Me too. Just playin. I’m actually very well behaved at games, something about being sober for 20 years will do that. I did, however, have to pop a moron from Ga Tech one time.
raven
@Higgs Boson’s Mate: When I got divorced I had my wisdom teeth taken out and defended my prospectus all in 2 days.
Mnemosyne
Made pulled pork in the crockpot — getting ready to eat it with some coleslaw and veggies on the side (not in a beans mood tonight). It smells good and it fell apart as I was trying to get it out to shred it, so I think that’s all a good sign.
jeffreyw
@Mnemosyne: Mmm… crockpot brisket.
PsiFighter37
Holy fucking crap. That GoT episode…
muddy
@Anne Laurie: Here’s mine, I’m ginger on the left. That blonde girl grinning like a ninny has on my good veil. Look at that stupid doily I was left with. What a tragedy.
Cassidy
@cathyx: I guess being polite is too much for you. Fuck everyone as long as you get your WHOO on. Down here we call that redneck, hick, etc.
cathyx
@Cassidy: Up here we call it a stick up your a$$. So golf claps for everyone.
Cassidy
@cathyx: To each his own. If you an your country bumpkin brood need to whoop and holler to celebrate, oh well.
cathyx
@Cassidy: Oh wait. I’m sure a golf clap is too much too. Silence moves the proceedings at a brisk clip. Chop chop.
fuckwit
@max: The correct technique is to water CONSERVATIVELY, just a little bit, and REGULARLY, don’t wait until the soil gets dry. Just enough to keep it from drying out, really. Let the rain do the heavy lifting. You’re there with the hose just to even out the unpredictability.
By the way, same strategy works for investing. Mix of risky and safe investments. You’re the safe investment; the clouds are the uncertain one.
Betsy
@eemom: Uh, oops.
What I meant to say is, so you have great taste in columnists as well as music!! Miss Manners is the very best! I read her every day she has a column out.
People who really hate her advice the most eventually end up as hosts on Fox News.
Conversely, no one who follows her lead could ever end up as a Teabagger.
I heart Judith Martin with the white-hot intensity of a a thousand suns. And live in hopes of carrying out her advice with more devotion til the end of my days.
She and Jane Austen are 40% responsible for my sanity … and most of the lasting social bonds I have.
MelissaM
@muddy: Egads! At least you aren’t the one in the hornrimmed glasses.
fuckwit
@AHH onna Droid: It’s not mean. She’s being subtly bitchy to the comfortable, but also compassionate to those less fortunate as well. If you are in a high school where it is a BIG DEAL to graduate, saying something like what she recommends is not at all mean… and you can say it good humor and let the hooting and hollering commence. Saying it in a middle-class white school should have the effect of properly chastising everyone into shutting the fuck up. It’s not a big deal when kids with money and educated parents graduate. It is a huge fucking deal when poor kids with uneducated and/or immigrant parents graduate. HUGE.
I read Miss Manners’ reply as being all about privilege. If you come from privilege, you have no right to celebrate what is basically a gimmie– you are playing the game at the lowest level of difficulty. If you don’t, sure, cut the hollerers some slack; they’re proud and they earned it.
Don K
What gets me these days is how graduation (at least in the Detroit area) is deemed worthy of a family/friends party that’s just short of a wedding reception (generally in the house and not at a restaurant or hall). These are generally catered, often feature valet parking, and I’m sure come with the expectation of a generous gift to the little precious. One of these happened in my neighborhood a couple of years ago, and there were around 30 cars parked in the subdivision.
In my day, a graduation party meant the dad of one of the grads who had a large lot bought a bunch of kegs and rented a couple of spotlights, and word was passed that “there’s a party at Steve A’s”.
Mnemosyne
@muddy:
I haven’t seen the pictures in a while, but I’m pretty sure I didn’t wear a veil — I got to wear a wreath of fresh flowers. What can I say, our church went whole hog on Vatican II.
Mnemosyne
@Don K:
And by “Detroit area,” you mean Bloomfield Hills or Grosse Pointe, yes?
My best friend is white, but she’s actually from the city of Detroit, north of 8 Mile Road. Whenever she would meet other white people from Michigan, she would say she was from Detroit, and they would chirp back, “Oh? Bloomfield Hills or Grosse Pointe?” And then look horrified when she said, “No, Dee-troit. The city.”
eemom
@Don K:
If I may proffer a middle ground…..we’re having a party at our home for my daughter’s graduation in 2 weeks for both sides of the family and her friends. We will be serving catered food because I sure as shit don’t have time to cook for all those people, but I don’t think that’s going overboard. Valet parking is definitely OUT.
As for kegs, I don’t know when your day was…..but do you have any idea what horrors await a parent who fucking dreams about an underage kid consuming alcohol on their property?
Ruckus
Dear Miss Manners
Kiss My Ass.
Yours Truly
Ruckus
Just Some Fuckhead
I’m with Miss Manners on this one. The only thing worse than sitting with the unwashed, half-assedly dressed proletariat is listening to them whistle and hoot every time someone gets a fucking diploma. Shut the fuck up so everyone can enjoy the ceremony. I’ll be sitting through my daughter’s graduation on June 13th and I’m already dreading the raucous and trashy environment I’ll be forced to endure for hours simply because lower-class people don’t know how to act in public.
eemom
@Just Some Fuckhead:
ok, it’s official….I no longer can tell the difference between Trolling Fuckhead and Regular Fuckhead.
Just Some Fuckhead
@eemom: That was regular Fuckhead.
dr. luba
@Don K: My nephew just graduated this past Friday, and his HS (Avondale) is a mixed area: UMC subdivisions and trailer parks. Ethnically mixed, too. For some kids graduating as a huge deal, for others not as much, but all were very excited. It’s the end of a large part of your life; you’re moving away, whether to go to school or the service or just work. It’s quite emotional for them.
My youngest niece continued our tradition of cheering loudly for each graduate–we feel everyone should feel appreciated. It’s only a hundred-some kids, and diplomas were handed out, so there was a bit of time between kids. The entire ceremony only ran an hour.
As for graduation parties, my thoughts exactly. I was flummoxed when the first of our younger generation graduated: catered food, tent out back, lots of people. I’ve been to quite a few since, and it’s as you say, quite upscale from our day (chips and pop mostly, and a handful of family or friends). And none of the parties have been in Bloomfield Hills or Grosse Pointe yet; suburbs, yes, but not Romney territory. Then again, the spendign for prom has gotten outrageous, too, as have weddings.
Yatsuno
@Just Some Fuckhead: Hell I refused to go to my own college graduation because after going to my cousin’s (same school) I thought no way on Allah’s green earth am I putting my parents through this again. That and I was bored out of my gourd. And they wondered why I nevrr volunteered for the commencement band.
Just Some Fuckhead
@Yatsuno: I attended private school. Graduation was a dress-up affair for both the students and the attendees. It was a solemn, dignified ceremony. It was not a cattle-call.
red dog
@Comrade Dread: Yeah a fellow curmudgeon and non do-gooder. My dogs can shit on my lawn so get off it unless you’re barefoot.
Steeplejack
@Just Some Fuckhead:
That’s just what Trolling Fuckhead would say.
Stacy
Living here in Prague and the Vltava is flooding so not much.
opie_jeanne
@muddy: How did she end up with your veil? Was she a cousin or something?
opie_jeanne
@Yatsuno: I was conscripted into the grad orchestra every year I was in college, until I graduated. Mine was the first class to graduate in Music, there were seven of us, so they were missing a great big key group in their little orchestra that year.
My son’s HS was the “minority” one in town and all the rich kids* went to Poly and everyone in town looked down on North despite the fact that it led the county in GPA, not to mention all the children of professors at UCR who attended North by choice. North’s graduation had some cheering but nothing outrageous and for the most part it was well-behaved but not stuffy, unlike the behavior at Poly; they seemed to always make the papers the next morning. One year the Poly valedictorian committed suicide on the podium at the end of his speech.
*white, privileged, lots of Mercedes in the student parking lot. There was a small group of African American students on campus, some of whom were also privileged but mostly not.
brantl
Miss Manners is a douche. Pass it on.
Tyro
@opie_jeanne: One year the Poly valedictorian committed suicide on the podium at the end of his speech.
This sounds like something that would have appeared in the news. Link?
Cassidy
@cathyx: It amazes me that none of you get this. High school fucking sucks, for most people. So finally, the day comes where it’s finally over and they can walk across a stage, get a piece of paper for employment purposes, and feel some relief that theyre done, and then some jackass in the audience decides to make this all about them. You see, when you do your hootin’ and hollerin’, despite just being plain rude and ignoring the people who have politely asked you to show a little restraint until the end, you’re taking the focus off the people who deserve it for that particular day. Honestly, the lack of any kind of discipline is annoying enough, but these half-ass attempts to justify your inability to restrain yourself really takes the cake.
muddy
@opie_jeanne: They didn’t have a veil, and we had 2. My mom said it was polite to give the other person the better one. I’d like to say that she was showing xtian generosity. You’d have to know my mother though. When voting in school for who to send from each homeroom, she told me it was bad form to vote for yourself, etc.
I really had very little idea of what I was memorizing prayers for, but I had been trying on the veil all week. I was all about the veil and thus the ceremony was pointless entirely. Kids are funny.
gelfling545
I just emailed Ms. Manners’ advice to a couple of teachers I know who are neck deep in preparation for graduation ceremonies as we speak (type?). I think she’s got something there. All of the ceremonies I have attended over the years have been in stifling non-air conditioned auditoria with woefully inadequate ventilation or in blazing sun outdoors.Then there are the family members who lifted a celebratory glass or so before the ceremony. Moving along in an expeditious & dignified manner is key to making the experience bearable.
eemom
@Cassidy:
Don’t forget the part about a high school graduation being exactly the same as a sporting event. If there was a crumb left on the plate, that’s gone too.
Cassidy
@eemom: It drives me crazy. My daughter just got inducted into the NJHS and I messed with her about yelling something out, but seriously, why would a bunch of 12 and 13 y/o kids need their ceremony interrupted by a 34 y/o adult?
sb
I would like to profusely apologize to all of you. On behalf of all teachers, administrators and staff, I’m so sorry your experience of our best efforts ‘sucked’ (the general consensus word). We’re well aware that it’s our fault entirely.We’re also well aware that you know best on how to make the high school experience wonderful and memorable and it’s our selfishness that doesn’t allow for your input. That is, of course, by design and the dozens of committees, meetings, notes and hours upon hours of thought into how best to run the place and engage the students are simply a cover for our own selfishness, along with our desire to make your lives miserable, of course.
Cassidy
@sb: Instead of assuming, you could ask what I mean when I say high school “sucks”.
It sucks because the parents don’t support education. It sucks because unless you’re one of the chosen ones, you spend much of your school life, starting in Junior High, being made fun of because you don’t have the right clothes, shoes, tan, phone, etc. It sucks because the teachers are forced to tecah a ridiculous test instead of getting the chance to teach them kowledge. It sucks because there is no money for extra-curricular activities, except sports which always gets new uniforms. It sucks because the district wants to save money and not feed our kids something nutritious for lunch. It sucks because talibangelical fucksticks insist on teaching some sort of death cult myhtology in every single classroom and are aided and abetted by RWNJ administrators and school boards.
philadelphialawyer
Problem is, plenty of graduates, and their family, are in the category of “relieved” and “surprised.” And, in my experience, those graduates are more likely to elicit hooting and hollering than either the run of the academic pack graduate or the top of the class kids. Other than the class “cut up” types, the ones who do make some kind of overt gesture to elicit crowd noise, it is the marginal graduates who, when their name is called, rev up the crowd, including their classmates, the most. Some folks are just plain happy that So and So “made it.” Others are reveling in the notion that “even So and So” made it. Others still, perhaps, simply can’t believe that he made it.
As usual, “Miss Manners” doesn’t get it. She thinks she is being so cute and clever and, at the same time, so cutting. But, in reality, she is completely missing the point and pretty much just stating the obvious. Marginal graduates, and their friends, family, and classmates, not only are surprised and relieved, but are not ashamed to show it, either. MM can’t “unlikely graduate shame” the kids themselves, because they are reveling in the role, particularly the part where they actually do graduate.
philadelphialawyer
@sb: Woah, there. Does all that have to be true just because many or most HS students think HS sucked? Was somebody blaming you, specifically? There is more to HS than teachers and administrators. There are the other kids, cliques, cults of atheletics, the mandatory nature of the whole thing, and so forth. Its not all about you. Get over yourself.
Barbara
@opie_jeanne:
Committed suicide? WTF!!!
I have mixed feelings about this — I attended my first daughter’s graduation 3 years ago and number 2 is coming up two weeks from now. I didn’t mind the cheering from the family members and audience at the time diplomas were announced, but I did mind all the whooping and hollering from the graduates themselves and in the audience while the ceremony was advancing, that is, being loud for the sake of being loud and not to show appreciation of a particular graduate. I found it to be disruptive and tedious.
sb
@Cassidy: Oh. Never mind. (sheepishly walks away)
@philadelphialawyer: See above. And I know it’s not all about me, thanks.
Cassidy
@sb: I love teachers, sb. If I had the power and funds, you all would immediately get a pay raise of at least 100%, get rid of those disgustingly awful standardized exams so you could create your own lesson plans and teach, fully fund the arts programs, and replace our school menus with healthy, free food. It’s bullshit that people want you to babysit their kids from the asscrack of dawn until the afternoon, but demonize and pout like children because you have the gall to ask for a salary to go with it.
Kyle
BEST MISS MANNERS EVER:
Reader: My husband has a light gray tuxedo. At what function would it be appropriate for him to wear it.
Ms Manners: Dining at home. Alone. With the blinds pulled.