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Stuck Update

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I burned up the phones today trying to contact potential relatives, and had no luck whatsoever. The funeral home also apparently never answers their phone and has one of the worst answering services on the planet. In a final act of desperation, I sent a long letter to the pastor who presided over the service in the hopes he could provide some info.

Reader Interactions

127Comments

  1. 1.

    WereBear

    If nothing else, what happened to Charlie is worthy of some effort.

    A message to all of us who love our little beings: make some emergency plans!

  4. 4.

    Emerald

    John, you might also try the Kindred Heath Care located in Albuquerque.

    I want to know that Charlie’s OK, and I’d really like to know what happened to Gen. Stuck. I’m amazed at how upset I continue to be over his death.

    Thank you so much for your efforts. I certainly hope someone in the family will want to know how much he was appreciated here.

  5. 5.

    Keith G

    John, the first one to sign the condolences book was a long time friend and left a contact button. I just sent him an email. I will forward you any response.

    I post this so others might hang back from filling his in box.

  7. 7.

    SiubhanDuinne

    I haven’t posted much about Stuck, but I, too, am astonished at how genuinely sad I am at the thought of his death — and, like others, worried about Charlie. Didn’t the obituary list a hospital or hospice or home of some kind (by name) that might have some information?

    Edit: I guess Emerald covered that, thanks. I couldn’t remember the name of the place.

  10. 10.

    Anya

    John, I would’ve liked for you to hold off on any General Stuck updates, unless it’s something news worthy, (a confirmation of his death or the good news that, this is a mistaken identity and General Stuck is alive). I say that because it distresses me to read all the disrespectful and nasty comments about his death.

  15. 15.

    raven

    There is no way he didn’t make plans for Charlie, give the man some credit.

    Also, thanks for your effort John.

  16. 16.

    mclaren

    @Anya:

    I say that because it distresses me to read all the disrespectful and nasty comments about his death.

    If a whole lot of folks are speaking up to make those kinds of comments, you might want to stop a minute and ask yourself if there might be a reason.

    Does the name “Andrew Breitbart” ring a bell…?

  18. 18.

    A Ghost To Most

    @taylormattd:

    If it didn’t happen last night, nahgunhapin (and I’m not advocating for it; let the assholes fly their freak flags).

  19. 19.

    Baud

    @Anya:

    If the news is bad and we have an RIP thread, I hope a front pager will be sitting by with the ban button.

  20. 20.

    Anne Laurie

    @Anya:

    I say that because it distresses me to read all the disrespectful and nasty comments about his death.

    And yet, other people are grateful that John is keeping us updated.

    Gen. Stuck, if you remember, was / is perfectly capable of dealing with those he designated trolls.

  23. 23.

    muddy

    Maybe people should let their personal wishes be known on the blog? If it were me, I’m sure my family would be happy to hear if anyone had something nice to say. On the other hand, the family might then look at the comments and read something hurtful I said. I don’t do social media, and I don’t link to this blog to family for this very reason. I’m torn.

  24. 24.

    KmCO

    @Baud: Amen. I haven’t even been around here long enough to know much of anything about Stuck, but anyone who would take sick pleasure in someone else’s untimely death is a reprehensible motherfucker.

  25. 25.

    Emerald

    @Anne Laurie:

    Gen. Stuck, if you remember, was / is perfectly capable of dealing with those he designated trolls.

    Right on.

    However, the behavior of some last night really was despicable. I’m normally not for banning people–I don’t participate enough here to influence such a decision, and I think folks here, like Gen. Stuck, are perfectly capable of dealing with it.

    But several people last night crossed the line, in my humble opinion. Just sayin’.

  26. 26.

    Corner Stone

    I’m not sure where all these incredibly sensitive souls think they are. Did I miss a sign post somewhere? A left turn in Albuquerque maybe?

  27. 27.

    dance around in your bones

    @Anne Laurie:

    See, this is what I think as well. General Stuck would have expected assholey comments and would have fired right back (maybe with his clown cannon). I just think it’s amazing that so many people have expressed concern and sadness.

    I expect if I disappeared from this site I might get 3-4 folks wondering what happened to me, and a couple more who would say “dance who?” LOL.

  28. 28.

    eemom

    @Emerald:

    A hospital or hospice would be prohibited by the patient confidentiality law (HIPAA) from giving out any info.

  29. 29.

    Anya

    @Anne Laurie: I am old enough to know that my opinion is not the only valid opinion.

    But I am sad that people can be that disgustingly awful that they show that level of disrespect to someone who they think is dead. General Stuck was one of my favorite commenters. I didn’t agree with him all the time but I enjoyed his comment and I felt his anbsence when he stopped commenting. I understand that others didn’t feel the same way about him. But there’s no need to be that heartless and disrespectful?

  35. 35.

    raven

    @Anya Your last sentence really doesn’t seem to be a question. The more people talk about how awful it is that some people are awful the more the awful people are going to jump in. John had an update, why don’t we just leave it at that?

  36. 36.

    A Ghost To Most

    @Corner Stone:

    I’m not normally one to agree with Corner Stone, but gotta agree here.

    Balloon Juice ain’t beanbag (unless those beanbags are being fired from a shotgun).

    That said, a lot of people here were truly assholish last night.

  39. 39.

    kc

    @dance around in your bones:

    I feel the same way. Though I’d notice if you disappeared. Maybe I wouldn’t notice right away, but . . .

    General Stuck was bound to be missed. I don’t read all the threads here by any means, but whenever I did open one, it seemed like Stuck was already there, hurling f-bombs right and left. A guy like that, you’re gonna notice it when he’s not around. ;)

  41. 41.

    Corner Stone

    I think this has turned into one of those things where people really don’t have any idea what they’re talking about, but they see a commenter, or maybe two, steadfastly repeat something as true and then they themselves just start repeating it as gospel. They really don’t have any idea what the truth is, but they saw it repeated a couple times so now they know that’s the line they should be repeating. So they solemnly and seriously repeat it.

  42. 42.

    gogol's wife

    @raven:

    I worry about Charlie’s emotions, but like you I’m pretty sure Stuck had a plan for Charlie.

  43. 43.

    dance around in your bones

    @Starfish:
    @Baud:
    @raven:

    Oh Gawd, be still my beating heart! I feel like Sally Field at the Oscars! Thanks, guys (kc, too – just reached my link limit :)

  44. 44.

    the Conster

    I was looking at some old BJ threads today and he was in every one. He also went by Gen. Winfield Stuck for quite a while. He was a huge wit with a big heart who loved his dog, and I really miss his take.

  45. 45.

    kc

    @muddy:

    My family has never heard me use a swear word. So nobody better show them my fucking pseudonymous Internet commenting history after I’m fucking dead, or I will be fucking PISSED.

  46. 46.

    Chickamin Slam

    This should prove to all the naysayers and on those occasions when you say “I hate all of you … get off my lawn.” Deep down you care. That makes you a better person than those people. You care about animals, rescued a couple. You care about food. You care about civilization and the next generation. You care about those who comment on your website even if you disagree with them at times.

    And deep down somewhere in all of us … we care about you too.

    Cheers John Cole!

  47. 47.

    satby

    I hope it’s not him, but he’s been gone from the blog so long… and I personally think his loved ones would be gratified and comforted a bit to hear so many people cared and thought about him. Thanks John, for doing what you can to solve the mystery.

  48. 48.

    Rex Everything

    I don’t recall ever agreeing with Stuck about anything. But the fighting was good. As AL said, he handled animosity just fine.

    I agree with everyone who says last night’s thread is a fitting tribute. Honestly, it’s just about perfect.

  49. 49.

    PurpleGirl

    @WereBear: My friends with all the pets had to write them, especially the parrots, into their wills. Each animal had a detailed plan as to their future if the humans pre-deceased the animals.

  52. 52.

    Redshirt

    So, if I die, let it be known I want a proper Viking funeral. Boat, treasure, flaming arrows, virgin sacrifice, the works. TIA.

  53. 53.

    raven

    I had a buddy at FDL, the Southern Dragon. Fierce motherfucker, Brown Water Navy and shit. He died a year ago and some cat lady has taken over his Facebook page. It’s really none of my business and he was a cat lover so I stay out of it.

  55. 55.

    Zapruder F. Mashtots, D.D.S. (Mumphrey, et al.)

    So as I understand it, it’s likely he died but we don’t know for sure?

    I hope maybe it’s some kind of mistake, but I guess that’s unlikely. I always liked reading what he had to say.

    It brings to mind, though, how great this place is. It still seems kind of weird to say that; blogs are still seen as kind of “not real” somehow, even though there have been great friends in history who never met each other, but only wrote letters back and forth. I guess that maybe in time, this kind of friendship won’t seem so odd.

    When our baby girl was born last August, everybody here celebrated here with me. When my beloved 15 year old dog died last October, everybody here mourned with me. When readers need help with something, finding a home for a cat or dog, raising some money for a good cause, it moves me to see how willing everybody here is to lend a hand. I don’t know of anywhere else that happens on these here tubes.

    I don’t know just how this came about, but I guess we owe a great deal of thanks to John Cole, without whom none of this would have happened.

  61. 61.

    Cassidy

    @Redshirt: Oh no. I’ve got this planned out. You can have an urn made in the shape of your head. You can also get bobbleheads made in your likeness. You see where this is going.

    So I figure, 4 kids, 3 months apiece if they want any of my life insurance money. In the living room, bobbleheading away.

  65. 65.

    SIA

    Looks like the thread is done, but I want to post a passage by General Stuck I particularly enjoyed.

    But there are moments I have with sir Charles that are not covered by that theory of interaction with pets. It is personal and really nothing more than we are fast friends in this realm of flesh and blood, without conditions, spinning madly together upon the mortal coil of planet earth.

    Beautiful.

  66. 66.

    mai naem

    Thanks John. Seriously above and beyond the call of duty. I wonder if the VA would have some info being that he was a vet.

    Anyhow, when I was looking through some of Stuck’s posts yesterday, it was kind of surprising on the number of people posting around 09-10 that I haven’t seen in a while. Can’t remember names off the top of my head but there were quite a few.

  67. 67.

    Jebediah

    @raven:

    There is no way he didn’t make plans for Charlie, give the man some credit.

    This is exactly what I had been thinking. Unless, of course, his passing was sudden.

  68. 68.

    Elie

    @gogol’s wife:

    amen. I really cried last night reading the comments and thinking on him. A good person… whatever happened — only the best and our love to him — and Charlie…

  71. 71.

    Elie

    @Zapruder F. Mashtots, D.D.S. (Mumphrey, et al.):

    Amen and agree… We are a community in the best sense of the word — both through deliberate action of said John Cole, — and the accident of good fortune and the vagaries of the universe. Hear Hear! To all of you — both who I fight with and who I adore — imperfect and absolutely right at the same time —

  73. 73.

    Omnes Omnibus

    I want a pyramid. A great fucking big one. I plan on living for quite a while yet, but you fuckers still better get started on on it pretty goddamned soon.

  78. 78.

    lojasmo

    So, Stuck has stumbled off the mortal coil? Damn. I appreciated his imputs on the franken reounts.

    The OP did not spefically state the death had occurred.

    Anybody checked on charlie?

  80. 80.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @A Ghost To Most: I see a difference between a pile of fucking potatoes and a proper pyramid. You fuckers would see it too if you really cared about me. I could compromise on a barrow, but I might turn into a wight and haunt you.

  83. 83.

    Jebediah

    @A Ghost To Most:
    They sure can, but I see that the Pharoah has spoken, and I for one do not want to be haunted. Cheesa Giza it shall be!

    ETA: Hopefully not for a long, long time.

  84. 84.

    dance around in your bones

    @SiubhanDuinne: Aw, SiubhanDuinne, that’s awfully nice.

    I was out at a birthday party and *gasp* disappeared from the site for a few hours. Cole is a sweetie-pie for trying to check up on Stuck (see? I’ma poet!) and I DO hope Charlie is ok.

    eta: @gogol’s wife: y tu tambien!

  85. 85.

    dance around in your bones

    @gogol’s wife: Muchas gracias. I tried to paste that into an edit to my reply to SiubhanDuinne but FYWP put me into moderation.

    Not that anyone would notice by now, haha.

  87. 87.

    Redshirt

    @Omnes Omnibus: You ain’t no Emperor. Why should you get a large pyramid?

    A smaller pyramid – like from 12 beer cans – is easily doable. Be realistic!

    For example, I’ve learned you can no longer hire virgins to die in your funeral pyre. Thus, I’m now willing to admit lustful, painted Jezebels instead.

  89. 89.

    dance around in your bones

    OK, I see why I got modded – the Spanish phrase for “and you, too!” contains a brand name for some drug that helps you sleep.

    Jeebus, FYWP.

  91. 91.

    dance around in your bones

    @Jebediah: I say we take off and nuke the entire pharmaceutical spammers from orbit.

    It’s the only way to be sure.

  92. 92.

    PhoenixRising

    The worst answering service in the world is actually located in Tarzana, CA and all the calls are answered by a lady named Bernice, who is referred to on our VOIP config screen as ‘Bernice who doesn’t give a damn’.

    You talked to Silver City, NM. My niece was born there, in a stock tank. My guess is that was no answering service, it was someone at the funeral home who wasn’t sure what you wanted.

    I don’t know how Stuck lived there, honest I don’t.

  93. 93.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Redshirt:

    Why should you get a large pyramid?

    I want what I want and I get what I want.

    For example, I’ve learned you can no longer hire virgins to die in your funeral pyre. Thus, I’m now willing to admit lustful, painted Jezebels instead.

    Why would you want to burn virgins? Also, wouldn’t the lustful, painted Jezebels be more, um, useful well prior to the funeral?

  94. 94.

    Redshirt

    @Omnes Omnibus: Well, in my day, virgins were traditional in your funeral pyre. But PC culture took over, yadayada, and now you can’t burn ’em up!? I know, it’s crazy, but that’s LIE-berals for you.

  95. 95.

    danimal

    I wanted to comment last night, but the thread was dying. I miss Stuck. My outlook is/was similar to his, so we usually wound up in agreement on the issues. He was always graceful to me, even when we had differences. But it’s certainly true he tended to pick fights more than was useful. I’m not terribly surprised the trolls came out last night, he certainly earned his notoriety.

    But the invective of some folks shows their true colors. In death (or suspected death), the decedent really should be given some latitude and grace. I never liked Andrew Breitbart, for example, but dancing on his grave just isn’t good form. Even in the midst of vehement disagreement, it is good to remember that our opponents have friends and family who are grieving. If there is no respect for the dead, there should be respect for those who mourn.

    Just my $0.02.

  96. 96.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @danimal:

    If there is no respect for the dead, there should be respect for those who mourn.

    In general, I agree with you, but I have a short list of those for whom I am willing to make an exception. Thatcher was one. Cheney currently tops the list.

  98. 98.

    Thymezone

    Very sorry to hear of the possible demise of Stuck. Always an enjoyable correspondent whether we were agreeing or not. Can’t read entire thread of yesterday, but is his passing confirmed? I thought I saw some uncertainty. In any case, for whatever reason he is no longer on the blog, he will be missed by me.

  99. 99.

    Thymezone

    PS — I haven’t seen anything about what is supposed to have happened to him. Is there information?

  109. 109.

    Gregory

    I’m sorry for your loss. His commentary will be (and is) missed. Thanks for your efforts, John.

  110. 110.

    Corner Stone

    People keep talking about others being real assholish, going too far across some line, or dancing on a grave. But no one is actually giving an example. Could someone maybe cite something that inflamed the gorge? Otherwise I’m of the belief that no one has any idea wtf they are talking about, and are just repeating a line they saw someone else type.

  111. 111.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @Corner Stone: FlipYrWhig said something about pissing on his grave. Redshirt accused other commenters of killing him. There were a couple of other items I’m too lazy to look up.

  112. 112.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    Beltane glibly speculated that Stuck may have died from “too much eye rolling”.

  113. 113.

    Corner Stone

    @Just Some Fuckhead: Well then I think Flip, Beltane and Redshirt should be singled out and let them speak to their comments if they choose. This whole “some say” bullshit reminds me too much of the GWB era.
    People, if you saw something, say something. But be specific so we can track the perps down.
    Thanks

  114. 114.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    Steeplejack callously brought up Stuck’s previous “Goodbye Cruel World”‘s, apparently insensitive to the fact that has an entirely different meaning when someone has actually passed away IRL.

  115. 115.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    Tripod accused Stuck of being the traitorous Edward Snowden. Not sure where that came from, probably just a General lack of respect for the other commenters who were mourning.

  116. 116.

    Johnnybuck

    @Corner Stone:

    People keep talking about others being real assholish, going too far across some line, or dancing on a grave.

    It’s obviously dancing on a grave, or being vile to suggest that it might be considered stalking to contact a funeral home to verify the passing of a pseudonymous poster on a fucking blog. Maybe Stuck should have had a blog buddy on BJ so that in case of his untimely death we could at least verify it. Maybe some of you should consider doing that.

    I enjoyed reading his posts, if he is gone so be it.

  117. 117.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    Kindness suggested Stuck committed suicide and that was the right thing to do.

  118. 118.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    About another dozen commenters were angry, profane and disrespectful to others in what should have been a solemn thread but I blame John for that. He introduced over the top vulgarity pretty early on. I know Balloon Juice is known for that sorta thing, but maybe an exception should have been made in this case?

  119. 119.

    Corner Stone

    @Just Some Fuckhead: Damn. I never realized just how many insensitive and assholish commenters were here at BJ. The rogues list you mention above is pretty awful. Now I guess I see what everyone’s been referring to with the “crossed the line” type comments.

  120. 120.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @Corner Stone:

    Damn. I never realized just how many insensitive and assholish commenters were here at BJ.

    Weirdly, the blog seems to self-select for that sorta thing.

  121. 121.

    gogol's wife

    I have not remarked on the vile comments, I’ve mostly ignored them, but I do have to say that comments #110-20 have made me physically nauseated. You two really need to take a hard look at yourselves.

  122. 122.

    Corner Stone

    @gogol’s wife: I agree those were some truly awful things some people said on the other thread and I apologize for making you relive that nightmare again. But there were at least five commenters specified as making those vile comments so it seems your number that only two of them need to take a hard look at themselves is a little low. I hope they take your admonishment to heart and return to the blog as better people.

  123. 123.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    I should point out that I don’t think there was anything intrinsically wrong with those comments I highlighted above but clearly others had a problem with them. I don’t think they intended any malice and I don’t think any repercussions should follow. People say shit, other people say shit. Rinse, repeat.

  124. 124.

    a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)

    I sent an email to Cole – hahahaha, I know. I offered help investigate since I suspect I’m the closest geographically to the place of inurnment and surviving family members there.

    I won’t demand any monuments, since Omnes beat me to the pyramid I would have wanted.

  125. 125.

    Corner Stone

    @Just Some Fuckhead: I also didn’t initially give those comments much regard, as I just thought they were pretty standard for the specific commenters named. But over and over again I saw people here really struggling with the vicious nature and intent they saw from Flip, Beltane, Redshirt and others. Now we see they still have the power to induce physical reaction from some of our most valued regular commenters.
    So maybe we should reflect on exactly what kind of boundaries we could possibly expect these kinds of asshole commenters to stay within. Maybe a little public shaming will be enough? I guess we’ll see if they choose to continue in that vein.

  126. 126.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @Corner Stone: I can’t go there with you. I like many of the aforementioned commenters and based on my interactions with some of them through this written word forum, I know them to be decent, caring people. Steeplejack, in particular, shouldn’t be singled out for inappropriately using an internet slang phrase with harsh overtones in the real world. He’s a mensch, one of the good guys and I’ll go to the mat for him. Redshirt, too. He was simply making a stupid joke. He wasn’t intending to make light of Stuck’s death. Not sure about FlipYrWhig. He kept going back and forth with another commenter about the proper way to eulogize the recently deceased and making jokes about it. He seems incorrigible.

  127. 127.

    JenJen

    I’m so sad to learn that Stuck has passed. I have a few family members interred at Woodside in Middletown. I’ll go pay my respects next week. Oh, how awful. :'(

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