Back when I fled the Bronx for a midwestern state university, I used to tell dorm mates hoping to make a reverse migration that my NYC Regents diploma mandated a lottery with the winners losers required to leave town to make room for aspiring youngsters from the midwest. Ah, nostalgia. Noreen Malone brilliantly revives an old trope to report for TNR on “Moderate Chic“:
Despite the unseasonably kind weather, the palms were turning brown and the hanging petunias were crying out in thirst last night on the terrace at Chelsea’s Maritime Hotel. The fashionable crowd, filled with Celine bags and Vogue staffers, and more than one pretty young jewelry designer draped in her own wares, didn’t seem to notice. They had gathered at the event grandly dubbed “Young New York” to fete Scott Stringer, who is the current Manhattan borough president. The gray-haired Stringer is short, balding, and wears rimless glasses. He is a middle of the line Democrat, well-liked by the Upper West Siders who are his neighbors and looks the part of the hilariously bureaucratic office he is running for, New York City comptroller. Despite his years of well-thought-of (if low-profile) public service, Stringer’s candidacy is mostly notable because he’s the only man among the Democratic primary field who has not very publicly frequented prostitutes (or taken on investment banks, which perhaps help fund the trusts of many of last night’s attendees). And now, too, the Stringer campaign is known for its glittering support: It has suddenly become the cause celebre among a certain strata of downtown types, who have embraced moderate chic with a wholeheartedness not seen in Manhattan since the first Obama campaign.
… [Lena] Dunham, clad in a short white dress and a one-sided braid, was greeted by a bright raised salute of iPhone photography. She spoke of wanting to support a candidate (for the office that does the accounting on the city’s finances) “with a record of respecting women and the issues that matter to them.”
Dunham, whose show chronicles a group of liberal-arts-educated young women living in the formerly working-class Polish neighborhood of Greenpoint, also spoke passionately against the rising cost of living in New York. She bemoaned the Europeans who did not know that a one–bedroom apartment shouldn’t cost $6,000 per month, a figure that did not seem to shock the crowd. She did not mention Stringer’s role, just last week (maybe motivated by worry about losing the support of the monied real estate community), in agreeing to the Mayor Bloomberg-backed plan to rezone Midtown East for skyscrapers that will help New York better compete with places like Shanghai, and which will significantly push the city farther down its increasingly expensive Bloombergian way.
Anyway, no matter! Involvement in local politics requires provincialism; Dunham made it haute. She joked she doesn’t even know how to order food when she leaves the City. She was mad that the Soho loft where her artist parents had lived now is by gaudy mass-marketers Victoria’s Secret and Sephora. “We can’t have our generation’s next Patti Smith moving to Tampa!” said Dunham. “That’s going to seriously fuck our shit up.” It was the second dig she’d made against Tampa (the first was as the punch line to a long list of places like Austin young creatives might move to instead of a Sephora-filled New York). I realized what moderate chic seeks to achieve. Or, rather, to preserve: the liberal façade cloaks a conservative impulse, which is the wish to keep the values of one’s own people preeminent….
While I was having a ’70s flashback, it occured to me that Tom Wolfe (does anyone under fifty who wasn’t a liberal-arts major even recognize his name?) doesn’t get enough credit for at least one very of-the-moment political tactic. His targets at the time may have been strictly friend-of-a-friend exaggeration, but “Mau-Mauing the Flak Catchers” is pretty much the whole of the Tea Partiers’ tactical game — sending outrageously costumed fear-mongers to intimidate/ blackmail government bureaucrats into paying off their “leaders”, rather than spending scarce funds on projects that would actually support their communities. Guess some of those GOP grifters do learn from the past, after all.
NotMax
Bella Abzug lite?
ruemara
I’m watching a pundit from The New Republic say with a straight face that Putin has no real control over what happens in Russia, just as Obama isn’t always responsible for what happens here. Anyone believe that?
schrodinger's cat
Is Weiner’s campaign dead or is it on life support?
trollhattan
Welp, I give up. Something in this story triggers a FYWP I cannot for the life of me unlock.
Therefore, FYWP with great prejudice.
http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2013/08/07/driver-shoots-self-in-groin-after-neighbors-stop-him-for-speeding-around-kids/
burnspbesq
Affordable housing? There’s no shortage of affordable housing in New York City. The only problem is that the affordable housing is in uncool places.
Tough shit. There is no Constitutional right to be cool.
Gin & Tonic
“Young New York”, who are only too happy to have Mom and Dad pay for their $6k one-bedroom in fucking Greenpoint or Red Hook.
Bring back the NYC of the 70’s, where these suckers would be robbed of everything on their person just walking one block in goddam Chelsea or Hell’s Kitchen.
BTW, I’ve been to Ybor City. I can’t stand the heat, myself, but for city living it’s nice.
trollhattan
@schrodinger’s cat:
He’s clearly in it for the yucks and camera time at this point (said from many time zones away). At this point I don’t think his mother would vote for him (the old b#$&).
burnspbesq
@schrodinger’s cat:
It’s irrelevant, which is much worse.
karen
I don’t understand what this has to do with Centralism. Or why Centralism is such a dirty word. Central is pragmatic liberalism isn’t it? I’m a pragmatic liberal, where I’d rather get some of the loaf than nothing at all. Why does that make me Satan?
Ruckus
Was just directed to an article in Salon about a 14 yr old and her incarceration in Louisiana.
Want to be outraged? Then here is the link.
? Martin
Sequestration (sorta) cost us a nuclear submarine.
burnspbesq
Then there’s this part of Noo Yawk Life.
http://espn.go.com/new-york/mlb/story/_/id/9547574/vandals-paint-swastika-racial-epithets-jackie-robinson-pee-wee-reese-statue-brooklyn
Narcissus
On Tom Wolfe: How do you explain the young people to the olds when you have been an old since you were young?
Suffern ACE
Honestly, having the next generation’s patti smith come from someplace other than New York would be awesome and desirable.
The Moar You Know
The populist in me loathes these people just as much as the Tea Partiers.
There is no “but”. They are equally vile. Both sides do it, at least when both sides are rich.
ETA: never heard of Tom Wolfe, but then again I am under fifty. Might check him out.
Ruckus
@ruemara:
Sure. I believe that he can not be responsible for what every person in his government says and does before it happens. Afterwards sure but not before. Even in a total dictatorship the leader is not responsible for each and every act before it happens. It’s what they do afterwards that counts. The most that a US president can do is have the person arrested and charged. Putin? I have no real idea but I’ll bet he is not so restricted.
ETA You did say real control. I still feel he can not control everyone but he seems to be able to influence them a whole lot more.
Yatsuno
OOH! OOH!
Damn you caveats!!!
The Moar You Know
@ruemara: As regards Russia’s “newfound” (it isn’t) hating on homos, he’s damn right. Putin had to get out in front of that or get run over. Russia is a very bad place to be different, especially right now.
? Martin
@Yatsuno: Hah! 43 and math/physics.
Though I know Wolfe from having read The Right Stuff as a source for a paper on the early space program, but I DO recognize his name.
Yatsuno
@? Martin: Two months away from 41, though Psi refused to believe it until I showed him my driver’s licence. I was all set to be clever too…
Oh and I’m thinking about a corgi puppeh.
burnspbesq
The International Fashion Police have issued a warrant for the arrest of Real Madrid defender Sergio Ramos.
He’s a worse blonde than Eddie Johnson. No, actually, he’s a worse blonde than Dennis Rodman.
The Moar You Know
@trollhattan: hahahahahahahahaha oh that is fucking priceless. Hopefully shot himself right in his fucking balls and blew his dick right off. As a consolation prize, I would take the femoral artery.
Suffern ACE
@karen: no. But what the article is talking about is the centrism of snobs. Pragmatism can be earthy!
dance around in your bones
I’m over 50, so I guess I don’t count, but I read every Tom Wolfe book back in the day, even if I found some of them rather florid and over the top.
I definitely preferred Hunter S. Thompson who was much more authentic. Wolfe was kinda a wannabe in a white suit. Just my opinion.
Jamey
@Suffern ACE: She was born in Chicago, lived in Pa. for her early years, and lived in north-central NJ till her late teens. But, yeah, whatever…
schrodinger's cat
@trollhattan: He should go to India, the current government has already outsourced India’s monetary policy.
? Martin
LOL. Actually I’m 44. I can remember who Tom Wolfe is, but I can’t remember how old I am. Fucking melon is going fast…
Jamey
@dance around in your bones: Wolfe is a cavalier (in his devotion to style and preoccupation with social status) ; Thompson, a puritan (in his devotion to a principle).
Anne Laurie
@ruemara:
Well, Putin is in control of the Russian
mobpeople just as long as he’s enforcing what those people want. Fortunately for Vladimir, it seems to outside observers very much as though ex-KGB functionary Putin wants pretty much exactly what “the Russian people” want.The argument on our end is that President Obama isn’t responsible for “gridlock” et al because he wants stuff that the GOP doesn’t. The issue according to his detractors is whether the President actually cares about those of us in the 99% (or even just his fellow Democrats), or if he’s perfectly happy to make speeches & let the GOP grifters do whatevertheydamnplease.
? Martin
@The Moar You Know: Interesting (in a wanting to hate the world sorta way) article over at Verge on that.
schrodinger's cat
Never read Tom Wolfe, or seen Girls and know little about Dunham.
The Moar You Know
@? Martin: I saw that. One of those things that makes me think the extinction of all mankind would be a blessing for all concerned.
NotMax
@dance around in your bones
Generalization: Wolfe was Esquire, Thompson was Rolling Stone.
Both were frequently, but far from always, worth perusal.
burnspbesq
@Jamey:
Deptford is deep in the diseased heart of South Jersey.
srv
I’m 49 and I remember his years as Dr. Who very well.
dance around in your bones
@Jamey: Yeah, HST didn’t really give a fuck about social status in the way Wolfe did.
I still remember reading Hunter’s articles in Rolling Stone back when it was a fold-over paper with no staples, which made it tricky to read in the bathtub (as I often did).
I read his books of letters much later, which revealed him to be a much more gracious and caring human being than his public persona let on.
I did like some of Tom Wolfe’s stuff but it never rang quite true to me (having been involved in some of those scenes myself) but HST’s always did. Tom Wolfe was an observer, HST was a participant.
@NotMax: Uh, yeah, I know that thanks :)
I am not a kook
@trollhattan: Instant Karma!
Omnes Omnibus
Madison meet-up was cool. Nice people. Two who have been arrested more than once at the Solidarity Singalongs. Someone took a pic. Maybe it will get posted.
I am not a kook
@Ruckus:
At the risk of blowing up some arteries, this is in the same vein from the cultured British Isles: http://www.lawyersgunsmoneyblog.com/2013/08/this-week-in-misogyny-england-edition
Gin & Tonic
@dance around in your bones: The Kandy-Kolored Tangerine-Flake Streamline Baby was mostly good.
BillinGlendaleCA
@ruemara: No, and neither did Lawrence.
gogol's wife
@ruemara:
All I know is that Putin’s Russia is a very different place than Gorbachev’s Russia or Yeltsin’s Russia. A much uglier one. He seems to have a great deal of control over that.
Punchy
AL – which Midwesty state uni did you attend?
gogol's wife
@Anne Laurie:
Oh yes, Obama has done nothing but give speeches. And pass broad-based health-care reform. And end our involvement in Iraq. And . . . oh, what’s the use.
Hillary 2016!
Joel
@burnspbesq: I didn’t realize the only problem with living in the South Bronx was its uncoolness.
eemom
@Omnes Omnibus:
ferfuxsake, you’re home already??
Here I had pictured an evening of legendary midwestern debauchery capped off by a pic of Cole dancing pantsless on a giant wedge of cheese. Or something.
liberal
LOL. That’s exactly what my old man did, 67 years ago…
Omnes Omnibus
@eemom: I have decisions to write tomorrow. Cole and a few others were still out. It was, however, more “Midwest nice” than raging kegger.
Anne Laurie
@gogol’s wife: Didn’t say I agreed, just specified the argument.
Ruckus
@I am not a kook:
All these years with what I thought was a functioning dick and I never knew it was magically attracted to vajayjays. And now I find out that some men have absolutely no control as to it’s use as a penetrating weapon. I just always assumed that I had to have permission. Am I the one who is genetically deficient?
I am not a kook
@Anne Laurie:
I think this is a little too mild in assigning responsibility. He is catering to the worst elements in society because he can keep the mob as an unofficial enforcer of his power. Get them to bash heads of political opponents. Directing them to attack the homos keeps them occupied until the next elections. He is all about raw political power.
If he wanted to crush the worst of the mob, Russia has a long history of prosecuting “hooliganism”.
Joel
Under 40 and read three Wolfe books (Electric Kool Aid Acid Test, The Right Stuff, Bonfire of the Vanities). Pretty good storyteller, but I tired of the old school crank conservatism, crypto racism, and florid descriptions of men’s body parts.
I am not a kook
@Ruckus:
What, do you also call your slampieces by name?
Yes. You are obviously not an Alpha Male. Just ask any Mens Rights Activist.
Dead Ernest
@dance around in your bones:
Well Dance, my sense of colleagueality (sp!), Hell, kindred spirit w/ you continues. Envious about the peaches you mentioned. Last week I went to a purported Farmer’s Market here in Purgatory/Kansas. Thought I was buying local peaches. Once home, found the Georgia farm sticker on them. Grrr.
Dead Ernest
@dance around in your bones:
…Electric Kool Aid Acid Test?
I thought you seemed familiar ?
I am not a kook
@I am not a kook: Can’t edit the post anymore.
Sorry, I shouldn’t use language like that even in jest. As Scalzi said, the failure mode of “clever” is “asshole”. Apologies for women seeing that term.
The prophet Nostradumbass
When did “gluten” become a generic scare ingredient in food? I just saw a fucking cat food commercial touting that it was “gluten free”.
? Martin
@The prophet Nostradumbass:
When people decided to spend more money on their guns and pets than their kids.
Ruckus
@I am not a kook:
What, do you also call your slampieces by name?
Yes.
Am I going to have to turn in my magic decoder ring?
DTOzone
@burnspbesq:
My friend, I live in one of those uncool places (Jamaica, Queens(, you want to come and find the affordable housing here?
dance around in your bones
@Dead Ernest:
Well, I did hang out with the Hog Farm in AFG and Nepal – AND I was on the bus! We drove from Kathmandu to Pokhara on some hair-raising roads, stopped for a few weeks in Pokhara (where we found out that tie-dying a teepee ruins it’s waterproofing, especially when you are camping out in a rice paddy) and after a wild weekend of clear windowpane sent to us by the Grateful Dead we embarked on a 200 mile trek in the Himalayas where I walked my ever-so-cool looking Tibetan embroidered felt boots right off my feet. Walked barefoot for 2 days until my (soon-to-husband) traded a t-shirt for a pair of flip flops for me.
So, I guess that could qualify as an Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test, no?
Ruckus
@I am not a kook:
That’s what’s known as being clever by 1/million. Couldn’t give you credit for clever by half.
The prophet Nostradumbass
@Ruckus:
“Such a fine line between stupid and, uh…”
“Clever.”
“Yeah, clever.”
mclaren
@? Martin:
Excellent! Now if we can get rid of the rest of our pointless useless worthless navy designed to re-fight the Battle of Midway, we’ll be getting somewhere.
dance around in your bones
@Dead Ernest:
I should also tell you that if you ever run across the film Hare Krishna Hare Rama you can see me as a young blonde long-haired girl jumping out of the back of a jeep. We signed on as extras for free food and (I think) about 10 rupees a day. We had to be filmed smoking chillums filled with hash and tobacco, and when the hash ran out they filmed us smoking only tobacco, which spun me out like crazy.
I can still hear that theme song in my head, oh here it is! Dum Maro Dum!
The Moar You Know
@The prophet Nostradumbass: My Costco liquid soap says “gluten-free” on it.
People are stupid and will fall for anything, what can I say?
The prophet Nostradumbass
@The Moar You Know: I’m waiting for “gluten free” gasoline.
mclaren
@burnspbesq:
Once again, the shit-for-brains tax avoidance lawyer gets it wrong.
The median household income in Manhattan is slightly more than $65,000. The median rent in New York City is now more than $3,000 a month. Do the math: after state and local taxes and FICA taxes and so forth, someone with the median Manhattan income can expect to take home about $39,000 a year, give or take a few dollars. Explain how you make that work when your rent runs $37,000 a year.
I am not a kook
@dance around in your bones:
Translation?
Love your stories – pure awesome.
dance around in your bones
Here’s a more true-to-what-I-remember of the Dum Maro Dum song in that Bollywood movie I was an extra in. And yes, that was all real hash in the chillums until we ran out.
Smokin’! I carefully scrutinized the background to see if I appeared, but no luck. And I don’t know why they call it Dam Maro Dam because I heard the song about a bazillion times and it was always Dum Maro Dum. FWIW.
@I am not a kook: There was a type of LSD known as windowpane because it came on tiny little clear gelatin squares. The Grateful Dead sent it to us in Nepal and there is a whole ‘nother story I can tell about THAT!
cokane
Who is this writer? She’s brilliant. Not even talking about her point or whatever, just her basic details are excellent but not overbearing.
Suffern ACE is a Basset Hound
@mclaren: not everyone living a type same address is in the same household. Yes, you end up spending almost 1/2 your income in rent and have two roommates to boot. But that’s the charm.
mclaren
@Suffern ACE is a Basset Hound:
No, you end up spending more than 85% of your income left after taxes.
That’s not practical.
chromeagnomen
@dance around in your bones:
i read a few of them also. he always struck me as the left’s george will.
chromeagnomen
@mclaren:
manhatten is not all of NYC says this sometime bronxite.
Spaghetti Lee
I thought it was Tom Wolfe who David Foster Wallace once described (quoting a friend of his) as “just a (male genitalia)* with a thesaurus.” Alas, it was John Updike. Close enough?
*-Damn you, spam filter!
GregB
Ever since I switched to gluten-free heroin, I have been feeling much better.
dance around in your bones
@chromeagnomen:
You mean George ‘blue jeans are the devil’s work’ Will? HA!
Maybe that’s why Wolfe always wore those white suits.
ruemara
@Anne Laurie: You know, I get what you’re saying, but that wasn’t the actual jist of the debate on the telly.
@DTOzone: High five. But Jamaica, Queens isn’t uncool. It’s just rather loud now, with all blacks from places other than Jamaica.
Dead Ernest
@dance around in your bones:
Odd, I don’t recall any of the windowpane not being clear. Deprived childhood I suppose.
Your adventure sounds glorious.
Smiling for you.
…to think of windowpane needing to be explained makes me think of the final scene of Mad Max. “Listen my children and you shall hear of Owsley, and blotter, of pink & purple barrels, and of visions so clear…”
Suffern ACE is a Basset Hound
@mclaren: no it is not practical. Which is why very few people do that. Which is why multiple households share apartments. Or people pay rent on things which aren’t apartments, but rooms in apartments.
Dead Ernest
@GregB:
:-)
? Martin
A friend of mine just returned from a 3 year stint working for ProPublica. She rented a pretty decent 2BR apt in Brooklyn for $1200. It was small by her SoCal expectations, but also cheaper than 2BR places here. National average for a 2BR place is about $950, so that’s really not bad considering it’s in a place where you don’t need the cost of a car.
dance around in your bones
@Dead Ernest: Next I’ll have to explain purple dome.
Sort of like in the Mad Max:Beyond Thunderdome movie and the kids with the TV screen made of sticks; “member this? member this?”
Sounds like you were there, back in the day :)
Gretchen
@mcclaren: your theory is that there are people with median income paying median rent to live in an apartment by themselves? And they just don’t eat? That’s not just not practical, it’s obviously not happening. They get roommates, live in the outer boroughs, live in worse neighborhoods than Lena Dunham would consider, stay with their parents, or decide it’s not worth it and move back to Ohio. As long as there are people willing to pay $6000 a month for a one-bedroom apartment, that’s what it wll cost.
Another Holocene Human
@The prophet Nostradumbass: I think marksdailyapple.com is ground zero for THAT crap
and it is about crap … I found that site when I found out I was gluten intolerant and a lot of gluten intolerant (but not celiac necessarily) people hang out there
however, there are a lot of people who are convinced that gluten is sekritly killing them even if they have no symptoms (IBS, GERD, etc) whatsoever
sparrow
@? Martin: @The prophet Nostradumbass: pets can have food allergies.
Rafer Janders
@Suffern ACE is a Basset Hound:
Which makes his point that NYC has a shortage of affordable housing. If multiple households are forced to share apartments, or rooms in apartments, then that indicates that the housing is not, per se, affordable.
Rafer Janders
@? Martin:
In which alternate universe was this? The average rental for a two bedroom in Brooklyn is around $3,200 (or $2,000 a month more than your friend reports), while even a studio rents for an average of $1,900 (or $700 a month more than your friend reports).
It is simply not possible to find a 2 bedroom going for $1,200 in Brooklyn unless she lucked into some sweetheart deal and/or something fishy is going on. That price is not available on the open market.
Rafer Janders
@Gretchen:
McClaren’s point was that New York lacks affordable housing, and you’re responding that he’s wrong because people “get roommates, live in the outer boroughs, live in worse neighborhoods than Lena Dunham would consider, stay with their parents, or decide it’s not worth it and move back to Ohio”?
Again, umm, this makes his point for him. If people are forced into these accommodations because they can’t find a desirable apartment they can rent as a single person on one salary, then he’s right that NYC lacks affordable housing.
Rafer Janders
@Gretchen:
And as long as there are people willing to pay $100,000 for a Porsche, that’s what a Porsche will cost. But that fact doesn’t mean that Porsches are affordable for the average person.
Rafer Janders
@chromeagnomen:
Rents are going up all over NYC, not just Manhattan. Brooklyn and parts of Queens are experiencing Manhattan-like rents these days, and developers are beginning to target the Bronx.
And to people who say well, so what, they can just move out to the outer boroughs, keep in mind that the further from Manhattan you get, the worse (or even nonexistent) the subway connections become and the longer the commute. This means that you either have to get a car, or spend hours a day commuting, all of which adds to expenses in the form of time and money and is itself an added cost on the poor.
I have a 20 minute commute to work. My assistant has an hour and a half commute. That’s an extra 11 hours and 40 minutes a week of free time that I have more than her, all because she can’t afford to live as close to work as I do. That’s 11 hours and 40 minutes a week that she could be spending with her family but is instead sitting on two subway rides and a bus.
Gus
Those who have never heard of Tom Wolfe would do well to read The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test. It’s a great read.
handsmile
So very sorry that I’m only just now reading through this thread, long after it’s unspooled.
But I must say how much I’ve enjoyed reading the opinions of those now living in California about accommodations and expenses, real estate and otherwise, of daily life in the five boroughs of New York City, circa 2013. For this resident of the urban hellhole since 1995, it’s been hilarious.
@Rafer Janders:
How dare you interrupt the comedy!
(i.e., thanks for the informed indignation.)
ETA: Tom Wolfe squandered his once considerable writing talent for mere celebrity some time ago. Lena Dunham, bereft of talent, is a mere celebrity.
Rafer Janders
@Gretchen:
In order for an apartment to be “affordable”, the rule of thumb is that you should spend no more than 30% to a third of your before tax income on it. A $6,000/month apartment, therefore, is $72,000/year, so based on that formula it would require an annual income of approximately $237,000 to be considered “affordable.”
Given that the median HOUSEHOLD (not individual) income is NYC is $63,000, therefore, the fact that apartments go for $6,000 a month means that they are not, prima facie, affordable for the average person. You have to be rich to afford it.
burnspbesq
@Joel:
That’s a stupid comment. There is a lot more to the outer boroughs than the south Bronx, and a lot of it is quite habitable.
Rafer Janders
@burnspbesq:
And, as I noted above, even the outer boroughs are increasingly unaffordable as they are matching Manhattan in real estate costs.
And the further out you go in the boroughs, the further out from most jobs you are, as well as being further from quick and reliable public transportation. You can live on Staten Island, but it’ll cost you an hour and a half to get to work in the morning, as compared to the average half-hour if you live in Manhattan.
Rafer Janders
@burnspbesq:
No, the only problem is that the affordable housing is very far away from the subways and from the jobs.
It creates an income-stratified city, where the rich have the luxury of living right by their jobs and the restaurants and the parks and the museums, and the middle class and poor are pushed further and further out to the fringes where they have to endure very long and unpleasant commutes.
Rafer Janders
http://www.mta.info/maps/submap.html
Above is a link to the MTA subway map. Play around with it, and note that (i) most of the jobs are in mid- and downtown Manhattan, and (ii) the deeper into Queens and Brooklyn you go, the fewer subway lines there are and the longer you have to travel (and in fact, in western Queens and Brooklyn you start to run into entire areas where there are no subways at all).
It’s not about “coolness” — it’s about accessibility.
Jenny
–