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You are here: Home / Civil Rights / Racial Justice / Post-racial America / Ahh, Tucker

Ahh, Tucker

by John Cole|  August 20, 20136:19 pm| 210 Comments

This post is in: Post-racial America, Clown Shoes, Our Failed Media Experiment, Teabagger Stupidity

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So the Obama’s got a beautiful new dog named Sunny, and here is my favorite reaction so far, and it comes from the Daily Caller:

With the addition of Sunny, the Obamas now have two black Portuguese water dogs.

The Obamas do not have any white dogs.

You seriously can not make this shit up.

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Reader Interactions

210Comments

  1. 1.

    Spaghetti Lee

    August 20, 2013 at 6:23 pm

    Just the other day I saw a bunch of Black Labs bark at a siberian husky, what’s the matter with this country, THANKS OBAMA

  2. 2.

    Ted & Hellen

    August 20, 2013 at 6:23 pm

    Speaking of race, John, we’re all waiting for you to post your deeply felt outrage at the racist, cold blooded murder of the young white man by three black teenagers in Oklahoma.

    Please keep in mind that, as in the case of Trayvon Martin, this is not simply about the facts as they are in this shooting, but also about the entire question of racism in all its permutations across the United States.

    Please proceed…

  3. 3.

    Warren Terra

    August 20, 2013 at 6:23 pm

    Google Cache copy of the offending article, if you want to read it without fattening Tncker’s wallet.

  4. 4.

    Hunter Gathers

    August 20, 2013 at 6:23 pm

    I’m the crackiest cracker who ever lived in Crackertown, and I’ve never had a white dog either. Guess that makes me a self-hating cracker. But I knew that already

  5. 5.

    Ted & Hellen

    August 20, 2013 at 6:23 pm

    Hey, one of the dogs is clearly mixed race. What’s the problem?

  6. 6.

    Xantar

    August 20, 2013 at 6:24 pm

    I’m Asian (Vietnamese, to be specific).

    Do I have to have a yellow dog?

    What if I have a black and brown tabby cat?

  7. 7.

    NotMax

    August 20, 2013 at 6:25 pm

    One surmises that someone at the Daily Cesspool blue-penciled a first draft decrying Obama welcoming a feisty young black bitch into his family.

  8. 8.

    BGinCHI

    August 20, 2013 at 6:26 pm

    And if he owned a white dog it would be reverse slavery.

    Both sides do it.

  9. 9.

    Jason P.

    August 20, 2013 at 6:27 pm

    Uh, both dogs are white: They’re PORTUGUESE, Tucker

  10. 10.

    Keith G

    August 20, 2013 at 6:28 pm

    I can’t tolerate the hate-filled smugness that is Carlson. I already imagine that the defense will be that its shits and grins and that’s it’s too bad liberals have no sense of humor.

    Aren’t the internets lovely.

  11. 11.

    dance around in your bones

    August 20, 2013 at 6:28 pm

    The Obamas do not have any white dogs.

    That is so estupido it doesn’t even deserve a comment. Of course, I commented anyway. But – really?!

    I just….I just….cannot understand the mentality of those people.

  12. 12.

    gnomedad

    August 20, 2013 at 6:29 pm

    “Tucker”? What am I missing?

  13. 13.

    Tokyokie

    August 20, 2013 at 6:30 pm

    I have two cats with blue eyes. I guess that means I’m a Nazi. And I merely thought I liked Siamese and related breeds.

  14. 14.

    Spaghetti Lee

    August 20, 2013 at 6:30 pm

    Also, isn’t the reason they got this breed in the first place is that one of the girls is allergic so they have to get a hypoallergenic breed? Jesus, Tucker’s a fucking twit.

    I think most poodles are hypoallergenic. I also think that if Obama had a pet poodle Fox News would have turned it into an 8-year-long dose of gay panic. (Sissy dog = SISSY PRESIDENT LOL)

  15. 15.

    Spaghetti Lee

    August 20, 2013 at 6:32 pm

    @gnomedad:

    “Tucker” is Tucker Carlson, wannabe conservative media mogul and all around preppie douchebag. He basically aspires to be Andrew Breitbart, which should tell you all you need to know.

  16. 16.

    Warren Terra

    August 20, 2013 at 6:32 pm

    Clearly the problem here is an ignorance of history: if they’re really going to go down this path, they need some “running dog of liberalism” type jokes. Also perhaps some Churchillian Black Dog references.

  17. 17.

    Trollhattan

    August 20, 2013 at 6:33 pm

    @Xantar:

    Jeez, my decoder ring only goes to 11 so I’m as puzzled as you are. You may be a racial traitor and because I have a Dalmatian, I’m probably racially konfoozed, or something.

    National Review is having a banner week, that’s for certain.

  18. 18.

    TaMara (BHF)

    August 20, 2013 at 6:34 pm

    So stupid all I can do is laugh. Much like this little tidbit from TBogg his a.m..

  19. 19.

    Trollhattan

    August 20, 2013 at 6:34 pm

    @Spaghetti Lee:

    You don’t think they would have drilled in on the French angle? “Cheese-eating surrender monkeydog.”

  20. 20.

    NotMax

    August 20, 2013 at 6:35 pm

    @Spaghetti Lee

    And endless repetitions of “cheese-eating surrender poodle” on FOX’s Chyron.

  21. 21.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 20, 2013 at 6:35 pm

    it was born in 2012 in Michigan, where the unemployment rate was 8.8 percent last month

    Whuddefuh?? Is that supposed to be some kind of canine long-form birth certificate or something? What does last month’s UE rate in Michigan have to do with the birth of a dog over a year ago?

  22. 22.

    BruceFromOhio

    August 20, 2013 at 6:35 pm

    The Obamas do not have any white dogs.

    How about that – neither do I !

    What do I win??

  23. 23.

    Stella B.

    August 20, 2013 at 6:36 pm

    I have two black dogs and one brown dog and I am as white as new fallen snow. I don’t even color the gray in my hair so that everyone can tell I’m a real blond. My dog Fred has a “gay” tail, however. He likes to point out that he was born that way and that it is not a lifestyle choice and furthermore he likes it to be known that bent tail or not he deserves the right to be part of a happy family. Also, too, he likes girls.

  24. 24.

    gnomedad

    August 20, 2013 at 6:36 pm

    @Spaghetti Lee:
    Thanks, did not know he founded this rag.

  25. 25.

    Trollhattan

    August 20, 2013 at 6:36 pm

    @Ted & Hellen:

    Is the DA twiddling his thumbs deciding whether to press charges? Do let us know.

  26. 26.

    Poopyman

    August 20, 2013 at 6:37 pm

    @Keith G: A true Backpfeifengesicht.

  27. 27.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 20, 2013 at 6:37 pm

    @gnomedad: Tucker Carlson is the owner, or editor, or publisher, or somethinger, of The Daily Caller, whence came the piece-of-crap article.

  28. 28.

    NotMax

    August 20, 2013 at 6:37 pm

    @Trollhattan

    No intent to step on you there. Your comment wasn’t yet showing while I was typing.

  29. 29.

    Gin & Tonic

    August 20, 2013 at 6:38 pm

    @Ted & Hellen: You, of course, have evidence that he was shot because he was white, right?

  30. 30.

    Trollhattan

    August 20, 2013 at 6:38 pm

    @Stella B.:

    “gay” tail FTW.

    First points this way, then that. Why can’t he make up his mind?!?

  31. 31.

    Betty Cracker

    August 20, 2013 at 6:38 pm

    I’m clinging to the sanity that the DC piece is just very poorly executed satire.

    Also, my 87-year-old former John Birch Society Ladies Auxiliary granny and T&H are apparently on the same Today in Colored Outrages email forward list. Interesting!

  32. 32.

    Poopyman

    August 20, 2013 at 6:39 pm

    @Spaghetti Lee:

    He basically aspires to be Andrew Breitbart

    And fails miserably. Now you know all you need to know.

  33. 33.

    p.a.

    August 20, 2013 at 6:39 pm

    @Jason P.: they call themselves Portugues, but they are really Cape Verdean. We must see the birth certificates!

  34. 34.

    JPL

    August 20, 2013 at 6:40 pm

    Since I refuse to link to the daily shithole, has anyone read the comments on his site?

  35. 35.

    Trollhattan

    August 20, 2013 at 6:40 pm

    @NotMax:

    Another case of BJ GMTA. No worries!

  36. 36.

    Comrade Jake

    August 20, 2013 at 6:40 pm

    Carlson has to be one of the bigger asshats walking the Earth.

  37. 37.

    rikyrah

    August 20, 2013 at 6:41 pm

    Tucker Carlson is a racist muthafucka.

    that is all

  38. 38.

    The Dangerman

    August 20, 2013 at 6:41 pm

    Has Obama had any White Tie dinners? No, but he wipes his face on white napkins and I bet he wipes his butt with white toilet paper. Case closed.

  39. 39.

    max

    August 20, 2013 at 6:41 pm

    The Obamas do not have any white dogs.

    He’s probably quoting from his copy of The Turner Dog Biscuits.

    max
    [‘Great rack on the babe in the ad but so not clicking…’]

  40. 40.

    ruemara

    August 20, 2013 at 6:42 pm

    Personally, I have a hard time being outraged at Fucker Carlson being Fucker Carlson. However, Sunny is a cute puppy.

  41. 41.

    Trollhattan

    August 20, 2013 at 6:42 pm

    @Betty Cracker:

    Granny by any chance have a velvet art collection?

  42. 42.

    Anoniminous

    August 20, 2013 at 6:42 pm

    Our Mexican neighbor has a black Shar Pei.

    WAKE UP SHEEPLE!

  43. 43.

    Phil Perspective

    August 20, 2013 at 6:42 pm

    @Spaghetti Lee: This post of John’s is just another notch in the list of reasons why I replace the “T” in Carlson’s name with an “F” when ever I say it.

  44. 44.

    Mandalay

    August 20, 2013 at 6:42 pm

    @dance around in your bones:

    I just….I just….cannot understand the mentality of those people.

    The comment is designed solely to get clicks on Tucker Carlson’s web site.

    What I cannot understand is why Cole was gullible enough to fall for it.

  45. 45.

    jl

    August 20, 2013 at 6:43 pm

    How many popular breeds of dog are white? How many WH admins have had white dogs?

    below is what seems to be an old WH page of Dub and Darth’s white house pets. All black or spotted (symbolizing approval of indiscriminate miscegenation?).

    Except, ardent liberal integration advocate Darth had a white dog and a black dog.

    Sorry for us Whities. The plot against us has been thick and developing, ever since Fala.

    White House Kids: Pets
    http://georgewbush-whitehouse.archives.gov/kids/pets/

  46. 46.

    Hal

    August 20, 2013 at 6:44 pm

    Meanwhile the dogs are like; “I’m not black, I’m grey.”

  47. 47.

    lojasmo

    August 20, 2013 at 6:44 pm

    @Ted & Hellen:

    I’m back from a 3 day, 2200 mile road trip to tell you to get fucked.

    Get fucked.

  48. 48.

    KG

    August 20, 2013 at 6:44 pm

    @Ted & Hellen: you mean the three teenagers who were immediately arrested and charged with felonies, as opposed to George Zimmerman who had the police hand his gun back to him and send him on his merry way? Gee, can’t think of why there might be a difference between the two cases…

    Then again, you want outrage? How about the fact that three “bored” teenagers had easy access to an actual gun?

  49. 49.

    Roger Moore

    August 20, 2013 at 6:47 pm

    @The Dangerman:

    No, but he wipes his face on white napkins and I bet he wipes his butt with white toilet paper.

    Actually, I bet he’s such a hippie-dippie liberal that he uses that nasty tan recycled toilet paper, because Real Americans need to chop down virgin forests to wipe their asses with.

  50. 50.

    Baud

    August 20, 2013 at 6:47 pm

    As the Governor of Maine recently said, Obama hates white poodles.

  51. 51.

    chopper

    August 20, 2013 at 6:48 pm

    this also proves that obama is obsessed with led zeppelin.

  52. 52.

    Haydnseek

    August 20, 2013 at 6:48 pm

    @Poopyman: There’s one really easy way for him to became exactly like Andrew Breitbart is currently.

  53. 53.

    Trollhattan

    August 20, 2013 at 6:48 pm

    Holy crap, evidently we nearly had another Sandy Ridge today.

    DECATUR, Ga. — A teen was in custody Tuesday, accused of firing shots from an assault rifle at an Atlanta-area elementary school where dramatic television footage showed young students racing out of the building, being escorted by teachers and police to safety. No one was injured.

    The 800 or so students in pre-kindergarten to fifth grade were evacuated from Ronald E. McNair Discovery Learning Academy in Decatur, a few miles east of Atlanta. They sat outside in a field for a time until school buses came to take them to their waiting parents and other relatives at a nearby Wal-Mart. When the first bus arrived a couple hours later, cheers erupted in the store parking lot.

    The suspect, a 19-year-old man with no clear ties to the school, fired at least a half-dozen shots with an assault rifle from inside the school and officers returned fire when the man was alone and they had a clear shot, DeKalb County Police Chief Cedric L. Alexander said at a news conference.

    http://www.sacbee.com/2013/08/20/5666365/official-suspect-in-custody-at.html#storylink=cpy

    http://www.sacbee.com/2013/08/20/5666365/official-suspect-in-custody-at.html

  54. 54.

    lamh36

    August 20, 2013 at 6:49 pm

    um, the Republican stupid burns everywhere

    Take it away Louisiana Republicans…geez. Does Burh or Obama deserve more blame for the handling of Hurricane Katrina. WHAT.THE.WHAT???

    PublicPolicyPolling @ppppolls1h
    Louisiana Republicans are evenly divided on whether Bush or Obama deserves more blame for the handling of Katrina

  55. 55.

    the Conster

    August 20, 2013 at 6:49 pm

    Half black black dog owners are the real racists. Half black black/white dog owners are secret Muslims. QED.

  56. 56.

    beltane

    August 20, 2013 at 6:51 pm

    @jl: There is a perception that white dogs are rheumy eyed. Some of the hardier white dogs such as Maremma sheepdogs don’t necessarily make ideal household pets.

  57. 57.

    dmsilev

    August 20, 2013 at 6:52 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    What does last month’s UE rate in Michigan have to do with the birth of a dog over a year ago?

    Benghazi. Duh.

  58. 58.

    Hal

    August 20, 2013 at 6:52 pm

    Oh god, not the three black teenagers story. Where oh where is the outrage that a random crime was committed by three sociopaths who happen to be black? Where is Al Sharpton on this one?! Doesn’t this totally negate Trayvon Martin?

    Remember folks; when white people commit heinous crimes, they are just bad people and all white people everywhere are not asked to explain. When black people commit crimes, it negates every crime ever committed against black folks by white folks for racially motivated reasons, and it’s an indictment of “black culture” which is all and solely about Guns, Ho’s, and Gangsta Rap.

    PS: Al Sharpton only appears when you say the name Tawana Brawly three times in a mirror, so he will not be appearing for this case.

  59. 59.

    Baud

    August 20, 2013 at 6:52 pm

    @lamh36:

    LOL. We should change our national motto from E Pluribus Unum to Obama culpo.

  60. 60.

    Baud

    August 20, 2013 at 6:54 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    Damn dogs stealing our jobs!

  61. 61.

    Anna in PDX

    August 20, 2013 at 6:54 pm

    @Betty Cracker: Yes, it has got to be poorly executed satire. Poorly executed because it would probably be funny if it were truly self-deprecating, but it’s too hard to believe that, given the source.

  62. 62.

    beltane

    August 20, 2013 at 6:55 pm

    @Trollhattan: Apparently our freedom hinges on the ability of deranged teenagers to obtain murder weapons without enduring even the slightest bit of delay or inconvenience.

  63. 63.

    dance around in your bones

    August 20, 2013 at 6:55 pm

    @Mandalay: Well, luckily I always hover over a link before I even think about clicking on it. Anything going to the Daily Caller is an immediate NOclick.

  64. 64.

    dmsilev

    August 20, 2013 at 6:55 pm

    @lamh36: Actually, it makes perfect sense. See, we know Obama is capable of time travel (how else do you think he faked the evidence of his own birth?), so it’s perfectly plausible that he went back in time to secretly replace George Bush’s incredibly talented FEMA director with a guy from an Arabian horse association. See, all Obama’s fault and Bush is just another victim.

  65. 65.

    MomSense

    August 20, 2013 at 6:57 pm

    The video is adorable. Portuguese water dogs look like muppets and I can’t help but smile when I see them.

  66. 66.

    JPL

    August 20, 2013 at 6:57 pm

    @Trollhattan: A local news channel mentioned that he fit the profile for those who want to do mass killings. White, young and male. He lived in the neighborhood and they still don’t have a motive but the office worker talked him down. He shot at the swat team and then laid down and gave himself up.
    If the office worker opened a drawer and pulled out a gun things might have ended differently. There was an armed police officer in the school btw.

  67. 67.

    Loneoak

    August 20, 2013 at 6:59 pm

    The Daily Caller: Putting the dog back in “dog whistle.”

  68. 68.

    MattF

    August 20, 2013 at 6:59 pm

    @Betty Cracker: Hang on to that thought. Even if it’s wrong, it’s better than the alternative.

  69. 69.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 7:00 pm

    @KG:

    you mean the three teenagers who were immediately arrested and charged with felonies, as opposed to George Zimmerman who had the police hand his gun back to him and send him on his merry way? Gee, can’t think of why there might be a difference between the two cases…

    I’m afraid that, blinded by his sheer pants-shitting terror of black people, Timmy is completely unable to understand that people were outraged that Zimmerman was set free, not by the crime in and of itself.

    If George Zimmerman had been immediately arrested, charged, and convicted of negligent homicide or involuntary manslaughter in Trayvon Martin’s death, no one would even remember his name. Instead, though, people like Timmy had to project their deep and paralyzing fear of black people onto Zimmerman and insist that he was totally right to kill an unarmed teenager and walk away a free man because who wouldn’t panic and kill a black teenager walking through their (mostly) white neighborhood?

    If the three murderers in this new case also walk away from their trial free men, then I will join Timmy in his outrage that murderers were allowed to walk. But I think the chances of that happening are somewhere between zero, zip, and nada.

  70. 70.

    Quarks

    August 20, 2013 at 7:00 pm

    Ah yes, the three teenagers who:

    a) stated that their motive was boredom, not self-defense/stand your ground

    b) did not, by their own account, judge their victim by his race or clothing choices

    c) were promptly arrested and charged with first degree murder and accessory to murder and firing a weapon.

    d) have mugshots:

    http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/08/20/20102447-2-teens-charged-with-first-degree-murder-in-ballplayers-killing-in-oklahoma?lite

    Yes, looking at that third mugshot I can’t imagine WHY John Cole isn’t immediately comparing this situation to Martin/Zimmerman.

  71. 71.

    John Cole

    August 20, 2013 at 7:01 pm

    @Ted & Hellen:

    Speaking of race, John, we’re all waiting for you to post your deeply felt outrage at the racist, cold blooded murder of the young white man by three black teenagers in Oklahoma.

    Please keep in mind that, as in the case of Trayvon Martin, this is not simply about the facts as they are in this shooting, but also about the entire question of racism in all its permutations across the United States.

    Excellent attempt at trolling, albeit a touch dimwitted. Remember, the furor over Zimmerman/Martin was that Zimmerman killed Martin, and then they didn’t arrest him or didn’t even do a thorough investigation. Here’s an article about the case you think is THE SAME THING:

    Bail for Jones, who is assisting prosecutors and police, was set at $US1 million ($A1.1 million).

    The three will be tried as adults.

    They were dressed in orange prison jumpsuits and had their legs shackled during the brief appearance in Stephens County Courthouse.

    Edwards and Luna did not show any emotion, but Jones broke down in tears after Mr Hicks said he was looking at a “very, very lengthy prison sentence”.

    “I didn’t pull the trigger,” Jones said.

    It is Luna who prosecutors believe fired the one shot into the back of Lane, 22, who was jogging along a road in Duncan on Friday.

    What? You mean there is an investigation and an arrest, and they are going to go to trial? Sound like things are working just as they should. Unlike Zimmerman. Your troll-fu is fucking weak, Tim.

    Second, your biggest beef was that I thought Zimmerman was guilty but “I WASN’T THERE, MAN!” Apparently your funny little mind thinks that every individual in the country has to presume someone is innocent. Wrong. People are presumed innocent under the law, but I have no fucking obligation to assume the same.

    I think Zimmerman was guilty. I think OJ was guilty. I think Claus von Bulow was guilty. And I think these three sociopaths are guilty, too. Deal with it. You can stick you presumption of innocence in your piehole.

    Stop with your weak ass bullshit. I know you think you are valiantly fighting a tide of groupthink, but you just keep looking like an idiotic asshole putting up specious and often time vile arguments.

    BTW- Sandusky is still in jail, and no word whether the kids liked it.

    And I know where this will go from here. Unable to deal with the facts and argument I have presented here, you will epically spiral out of control, lashing out at me and anyone else with a working concept of logic and argument, until one of the other front pager bans you, and then I will get a weeks worth of whiny emails.

  72. 72.

    JPL

    August 20, 2013 at 7:01 pm

    @JPL: The mass murderer wanna be apparently followed someone who was buzzed in.

    @MomSense: Me, too!!!! I watched it several times today in between monitoring the local news.

  73. 73.

    SectarianSofa

    August 20, 2013 at 7:02 pm

    Has anyone noted this? It makes no real sense to me, but, whatever — Groklaw shuts down in response to perceived privacy/snooping threats:
    http://arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2013/08/groklaw-shuts-down-rather-than-risk-feds-snooping-through-e-mail/

  74. 74.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 7:02 pm

    @Betty Cracker:

    Also, my 87-year-old former John Birch Society Ladies Auxiliary granny and T&H are apparently on the same Today in Colored Outrages email forward list. Interesting!

    Timmy’s only on that e-mail list because he’s so much more liberal than the rest of us, don’t’cha know.

  75. 75.

    Seanly

    August 20, 2013 at 7:02 pm

    My wife & I have an orangish dog & a brown lab mix. She likes to call them caramel & chocolate (not their names) – she has a thing for food. She’s Greek-Cuban & I’m a pasty Irish-Italian-Scot-German-miscellaneous. I’m having trouble figuring out where Tucker would place us. But then maybe I’d just kick him in his junk before he said anything.

  76. 76.

    ruemara

    August 20, 2013 at 7:02 pm

    @lamh36: Wait, wah?

  77. 77.

    Hal

    August 20, 2013 at 7:03 pm

    @beltane:

    Apparently our freedom hinges on the ability of deranged teenagers to obtain murder weapons without enduring even the slightest bit of delay or inconvenience.

    The father of the three year old who found his gun and accidentally killed himself took to facebook to defend the right to own guns, oh and also keep your guns locked up folks!

    That’s the type of gun culture we have in this country.

  78. 78.

    Socoolsofresh

    August 20, 2013 at 7:03 pm

    Meanwhile in other Obama news, the administration wants police to be allowed to do warrantless cellphone searches. Change that I can believe in.

    http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/the-switch/wp/2013/08/19/obama-administration-asks-supreme-court-to-allow-warrantless-cellphone-searches/?print=1

  79. 79.

    JoyceH

    August 20, 2013 at 7:04 pm

    @jl:

    How many popular breeds of dog are white? How many WH admins have had white dogs?

    There’s always the Samoyed. (Best dogs evah!) Problem though – they’re Roosky dogs. So if the Obamas had got a Samoyed instead of a PWD, I’m sure their detractors would call it proof of communist tendencies.

  80. 80.

    KG

    August 20, 2013 at 7:04 pm

    @Mnemosyne: hell, even if Zimmerman had been immediately arrested, tried, and acquitted, I doubt most people would know who he was.

  81. 81.

    JPL

    August 20, 2013 at 7:05 pm

    @John Cole: OMG.. When you are good, you are really good. I need a cigarette after that.

  82. 82.

    Baud

    August 20, 2013 at 7:05 pm

    @Socoolsofresh:

    Meanwhile in other Obama news, the administration wants police to be allowed to do warrantless cellphone searches incident to arrest.

    Fixed. Don’t agree with the position, but people should judge it for what it actually is.

    ETA: And the notion that Obama’s DOJ was going to stop exercising the longstanding role of the Executive Branch of representing the interests of law enforcement before the courts is ludicrous.

  83. 83.

    MomSense

    August 20, 2013 at 7:06 pm

    @dmsilev:

    He also crashed the economy in 2008 with his wicked, socialist ways.

  84. 84.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 7:06 pm

    @Quarks:

    From your link:

    He said that there has been an escalation in major crimes committed by people under 18 in recent years in Stephens County, a rural ranching and farming community about an hour and a half outside Oklahoma City.

    I still suspect crystal meth.

  85. 85.

    MikeBoyScout

    August 20, 2013 at 7:06 pm

    My cat is orange.
    Orange is the new black.
    QED

  86. 86.

    beltane

    August 20, 2013 at 7:06 pm

    The co-chairman of an Iowa country’s GOP has left the party due to Steve King’s craziness http://blogs.desmoinesregister.com/dmr/index.php/2013/08/20/former-polk-gop-co-chairman-says-party-has-moved-too-far-to-the-right/article?gcheck=1

  87. 87.

    MattF

    August 20, 2013 at 7:07 pm

    @JoyceH: Commie ‘tendencies’? Whoa. None of this lefty ‘moderation in defense of liberty’, if you please, ma’am.

  88. 88.

    Baud

    August 20, 2013 at 7:08 pm

    @MomSense:

    I still haven’t forgiven him for his role in the Dreyfuss Affair.

  89. 89.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 7:08 pm

    @Socoolsofresh:

    If the police arrest you, do they need a warrant to rifle through your cellphone? Courts have been split on the question. Last week the Obama administration asked the Supreme Court to resolve the issue and rule that the Fourth Amendment allows warrantless cellphone searches.

    Oh noes! The Obama administration wants the courts to clarify a point of law! The horror! The outrage! How dare they even think of asking to have the law clarified!

    To the barricades, mes amis! We cannot allow these demands for legal clarification by the courts to stand!

  90. 90.

    gnomedad

    August 20, 2013 at 7:09 pm

    @Loneoak:

    The Daily Caller: Putting the dog back in “dog whistle.”

    You win the internets running away!

  91. 91.

    piratedan

    August 20, 2013 at 7:10 pm

    @dmsilev: plus that undocumented evidence of him routing trucks in Oklahoma to Texas instead of Lousiana, because a black man was sighted along side the road with a Dallas sign held up…..

  92. 92.

    Baud

    August 20, 2013 at 7:10 pm

    @Mnemosyne:

    To be fair, they didn’t just ask the court to clarify the issue — they are taking a position. I hope they lose, but it fully within the role of the DOJ to represent law enforcement before the courts.

  93. 93.

    MomSense

    August 20, 2013 at 7:11 pm

    @JPL:

    I couldn’t wait to show the video to my youngest who also thinks they are ridiculously cute. We have friends who have a labradoodle puppy and that is another wonderfully muppet like creature. Every time I see her flop around, I giggle!

  94. 94.

    Roger Moore

    August 20, 2013 at 7:11 pm

    @Baud:

    We should change our national motto from E Pluribus Unum to Obama culpo.

    You’re way behind the times. That was the first thing the Republican House did in 2011.

  95. 95.

    raven

    August 20, 2013 at 7:12 pm

    @John Cole: So ban the fucking punk.

  96. 96.

    Josie

    August 20, 2013 at 7:13 pm

    @beltane:

    I beg your pardon. I have a a hardy white dog, a 140 pound akbash, and she was the best dog evah. I will admit that the early training period was a touch difficult, as she was super smart and super stubborn. But we reached an accord and she was wonderful.

    ETA: They are Turkish, so I don’t know how that would affect the controversy.

  97. 97.

    Roger Moore

    August 20, 2013 at 7:14 pm

    @John Cole:

    You mean there is an investigation and an arrest, and they are going to go to trial? Sound like things are working just as they should.

    I think he’s hoping for summary execution.

  98. 98.

    Hal

    August 20, 2013 at 7:16 pm

    @Mnemosyne:

    Per the story, courts have already ruled you can search through things like calendars and notebooks. This was a flip phone which is basically low tech with just numbers and possibly addresses.

    My concern is another point made in the story:

    But as the storage capacity of cellphones rises, that position could become harder to defend. Our smart phones increasingly contain everything about our digital lives: our e-mails, text messages, photographs, browser histories and more. It would be troubling if the police had the power to get all that information with no warrant merely by arresting a suspect.

    It would be good on the part of the DOJ to clarify what qualifies as usable information. Just phone numbers, or any info at all you might have on your phone? Eventually people will be carrying all of their private information around with them, which makes me fear the courts falling way behind technology in their rulings.

  99. 99.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    August 20, 2013 at 7:17 pm

    Speaking of the Daily Caller
    Daily Caller: Obama is a woman, and women are terrible!
    This is a link to a Salon story about the DC post. The excerpt Salon posted is too incoherent for any of it to bear quoting. It has something to do with Obama not being “a killer”, like Bruce Willis in Diehard, and Dumbya like totally was, as were “The Roosevelts”.

  100. 100.

    beltane

    August 20, 2013 at 7:18 pm

    @Josie: A Muslim dog would hardly appease the likes of Tucker Carlson. Then again, these people would whine about the Obamas’ dogs no matter what color or breed they were.

  101. 101.

    gbear

    August 20, 2013 at 7:19 pm

    @John Cole: Wow. That was great. About the only thing you missed was to tell him to go bite a fart.

  102. 102.

    Mark

    August 20, 2013 at 7:20 pm

    It starts small, with the dog stuff. Next thing you know Obama’ll change the name of the White House to the Black House. You wait and see.

  103. 103.

    fuckwit

    August 20, 2013 at 7:21 pm

    Their reality has lapped our satire.

  104. 104.

    gbear

    August 20, 2013 at 7:22 pm

    I’ve found that Tucker Carlson is easier to take when you remember that, when he’s seventy years old, he’ll still be stuck being Tucker Carlson. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone’s old age.

  105. 105.

    gbear

    August 20, 2013 at 7:27 pm

    @beltane: Yay Iowa. Beats Maine where a bunch of party leaders just quit because the party wasn’t conservative enough for them.

  106. 106.

    MattF

    August 20, 2013 at 7:27 pm

    Via TPM, Congressman Kerry Bentivolio really, really, really wants to impeach Obama– but there’s a problem:

    But, the Michigan congressman continued, there first has to be evidence to impeach the president.

    “Until we have evidence, you’re going to become a laughing stock if you’ve submitted the bill to impeach the president because number one, you’ve got to convince the press,” Bentivolio continued. “There are some people out there no matter what Obama does he’s still the greatest president they’ve ever had. That’s what you’re fighting.”

    Gosh. Evidence. I’m stunned.

  107. 107.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 20, 2013 at 7:29 pm

    @dmsilev:

    Benghazi. Duh.

    I spose I have to write this 100 times on the blackboard.

    Oops, I mean the board of color.

    (What happened to the strikeout thingie up there with quote and bold and all?)

  108. 108.

    fuckwit

    August 20, 2013 at 7:30 pm

    @Baud: Thank you for saying this.

    Just to +1 this… in case anyone isn’t aware, the Executive is a LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICER. Yes, the President is a cop. As are many of his departments (EPA enforces environmental regs, DOE enforces nuclear regs, Labor dept enforces labor regs, and of course there’s the AG).

    Those Hamilton, Madison, and Jay guys had their shit together: three equal branches of government, one to make the laws, one to interpret the laws, and one to execute (and enforce) the laws. It looks like one branch has asked the other branch to do their job.

    In this case, if we don’t like the laws, guess what, we can elect a Congress that will change them. I’d love to see a law stating that cellphones are considered unsearchable without a warrant. Who will write that law (ooh, maybe Bernie Sanders would, or Barbara Lee, and I can think of a few cosponsors…), and who will push it through Congress to get it passed?

    Summary: don’t like the laws, then CHANGE THE LAWS. Can’t get the laws changed, then CHANGE THE LAWMAKERS.

    Cops are supposed to enforce the damn things. They don’t (and shouldn’t) write ’em.

  109. 109.

    realbtl

    August 20, 2013 at 7:30 pm

    My English Lab is white not yellow and a total sweetie. Add to that my grey Weimaraner and I’m at least on the whiteish side.

  110. 110.

    Chyron HR

    August 20, 2013 at 7:31 pm

    @Roger Moore:

    I think [Tim Otte]’s hoping for summary execution.

    Well, come on, there’s millions of blacks in the US alone, and Zimmerman’s only got so many bullets to go around.

  111. 111.

    Roger Moore

    August 20, 2013 at 7:32 pm

    @MattF:

    But, the Michigan congressman continued, there first has to be evidence to impeach the president.

    Newt Gingrich didn’t let a little thing like evidence stop him!

  112. 112.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 7:33 pm

    @Hal:

    It would be good on the part of the DOJ to clarify what qualifies as usable information.

    As I understand it, the DOJ (a branch of law enforcement) is not allowed to decide on their own what does or does not qualify as usable information that can be presented in a court, for very good reasons laid out in the US Constitution. This is why the courts need to decide.

    I agree with you that most judges do need some remedial education on current technology and what it does and can do (and, even more importantly, what the limits of it are), but that doesn’t mean that the executive branch should be interpreting the law on their own.

    ETA: I just realized that you may have meant that the DOJ is right to go to the courts to request clarification, in which case, never mind.

  113. 113.

    eemom

    August 20, 2013 at 7:36 pm

    @John Cole:

    ooo-weee.

  114. 114.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 20, 2013 at 7:36 pm

    @Mnemosyne:

    Timmy’s only on that e-mail list because

    This is pretty off-topic (and honestly, I don’t really care that much), but why do you call him Timmy (and Yatsy calls him Timmeh), etc.? Where did that come from? If I ever knew, I can’t remember.

  115. 115.

    slag

    August 20, 2013 at 7:38 pm

    @John Cole: I thought I read somewhere that Tim’s not racist or sexist and that he’s just misunderstood. Where was that again? I don’t recall.

  116. 116.

    gbear

    August 20, 2013 at 7:39 pm

    @MattF:

    Bentivolio continued. “There are some people out there no matter what Obama does he’s still the greatest president they’ve ever had. That’s what you’re fighting.”

    Obama is the greatest president I’ve ever had.

  117. 117.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    August 20, 2013 at 7:39 pm

    I woulda had to name the dog Frederick Doglass or Backyard Rustin.

  118. 118.

    Yatsuno

    August 20, 2013 at 7:40 pm

    @John Cole: :: applause ::

    You realise you’re still gonna get the whiny e-mail, amirite?

  119. 119.

    BD of MN

    August 20, 2013 at 7:44 pm

    I have two Great Pyrenees, who are white when they’re not digging trenches in my yard and laying in them, but I guess they’re Spanish (illegal immigrants!), or worse yet, French…

  120. 120.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 20, 2013 at 7:45 pm

    @Mnemosyne:

    To the barricades, mes amis!

    Aux armes, citoyens! Formez vos battalions!

  121. 121.

    Davebo

    August 20, 2013 at 7:51 pm

    @Ted & Hellen:

    There are 3 black teenagers in Oklahoma?

    I’d need SoonerGrunt’s confirmation on this.

  122. 122.

    gogol's wife

    August 20, 2013 at 7:53 pm

    @NotMax:

    Thanks for the Cosmo recipe — it’s perfect!

  123. 123.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 7:54 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    He used to go by Tim, and then Tim, Interrupted, after one of his several bannings. Yutsy and I just like to remind him that no matter how many times he changes his nym, we always know who he is.

    I just found my new favorite quote a few months ago, by Kurt Vonnegut: We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.

  124. 124.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 7:57 pm

    @Davebo:

    It’s kinda hard to tell from the picture, but it looks like it may have been a mixed group of three — two black and one white. But that, of course, won’t stop the OUTRAGE AT BLACK RACIST KILLERS!1!

  125. 125.

    Donut

    August 20, 2013 at 7:57 pm

    @Ted & Hellen:

    @John Cole:

    http://youtu.be/t7Tm0SQT7N4

  126. 126.

    Josie

    August 20, 2013 at 7:59 pm

    @BD of MN:

    Did you know there is a reason for the trenches? We had akbash dogs (similar to pyranees) out with the goats. They would dig a hole near the herd and hide in it. All you could see was a bit of the head. Then when the coyotes (or the two legged predators) would get near the herd, out would come the dogs and the chase was on. We found some shoes and pants on the barb wire fence one morning. I wish I had been able to see that event.

  127. 127.

    Austin Loomis

    August 20, 2013 at 7:59 pm

    @Anoniminous:

    WAKE UP SHEEPLE!

    TEN THOUSAND YEARS WE SLUMBERED… NOW WE RISE.

    You fool!

  128. 128.

    BillinGlendaleCA

    August 20, 2013 at 8:00 pm

    @fuckwit: Preach it.

  129. 129.

    Villago Delenda Est

    August 20, 2013 at 8:00 pm

    @John Cole:

    until one of the other front pager bans you, and then I will get a weeks worth of whiny emails.

    John, at this point, in spite of your philosophical opposition to permabanning posters, you should consider simply deleting all those emails and permanently ignoring Special Timmeh.

    There is no point at all at letting this petulant little shit tempt you to downing a fifth of scotch in an attempt to self medicate the stoopid away.

  130. 130.

    shelly

    August 20, 2013 at 8:03 pm

    Louisiana Republicans are evenly divided on whether Bush or Obama deserves more blame for the handling of Katrina

    Jesus, does the bayou humidity soften the brain?

  131. 131.

    Villago Delenda Est

    August 20, 2013 at 8:03 pm

    @MattF:

    This guy is obviously weak. How the teatards stand him, I’ll never know.

  132. 132.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 20, 2013 at 8:05 pm

    @Mnemosyne: Thanks. I don’t remember Tim, have only the vaguest memories of Tim, Interrupted. I guess as he got more and more crazyrageous, his nyms got more and more ridiculous.

    Okay, that’s more than enough energy devoted to Timmeh.

  133. 133.

    Tim in SF

    August 20, 2013 at 8:10 pm

    If this is all an elaborate setup so they can say ‘Sunny, Bo, no!’ when the dogs misbehave, then well done, Obamas.

  134. 134.

    shelly

    August 20, 2013 at 8:13 pm

    Obama is the greatest president I’ve ever had.

    How many presidents have you slept with? ;-)

  135. 135.

    gbear

    August 20, 2013 at 8:13 pm

    @Tim in SF: I hope you’ll be here all week. I’ll remember to tip my waitress.

  136. 136.

    Socoolsofresh

    August 20, 2013 at 8:14 pm

    @Mnemosyne: Why am I not surprised that is your reaction. Minimize and misinterpret. Can’t wait until the courts allow this to become law so that you can say, “It’s all good! It’s legal! Obama had nothing to do with it, he is just carrying out the law’, while he is the one pushing for it.

  137. 137.

    karen

    August 20, 2013 at 8:14 pm

    I have a grey female kitty. Does that make me hate young males?

  138. 138.

    Roger Moore

    August 20, 2013 at 8:14 pm

    @shelly:

    Jesus, does the bayou humidity soften the brain?

    Not nearly as much as listening to Republicans does.

  139. 139.

    SectarianSofa

    August 20, 2013 at 8:14 pm

    @Tim in SF:

    Ouch. You win.

  140. 140.

    Donut

    August 20, 2013 at 8:17 pm

    @Mnemosyne:

    Timmy (pronounced as “Timmeh”) is the name of a character on “South Park” who has special needs.

  141. 141.

    Ted & Hellen

    August 20, 2013 at 8:21 pm

    @John Cole:

    Epic job of working your Obot base, Cole.

    Talk about weak bullshit.

    It wasn’t enough for the the Bots that Zimmerman be arrested and charged, he had to be CONVICTED.

    What the cops knew early on, and what the jury decided later, is that there was never enough evidence to charge Z in the first place.

    If after all we’ve seen, you REALLY still believe Z is “guilty” of something/something/something, then you are definitely past time to get off the sauce. Your brain is pickled.

    I’ll add this one more time: You switched sides a few years back, because you always have to belong to a side, but you’ve done nothing to improve your flawed thinking. You know…the thinking that had you slurping GWB’s testicles and helping to kill Iraqis and put U.S. soldiers in the grave and hospitals. Remember those things?

    I think it’s time for you to go to the VA center and change bedpans for a few weeks…did you ever really go do that? Or was that all talk? Maybe then you’ll remember how fucked up your style of thinking is.

  142. 142.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 8:22 pm

    @Socoolsofresh:

    Minimize and misinterpret.

    Perhaps you need to refresh your memory of how the US government works with this little ditty. You really want law enforcement — aka the executive branch — to decide how laws should be interpreted, not the courts? Consider your answer carefully.

  143. 143.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 8:26 pm

    @Ted & Hellen:

    Poor Timmy. He just can’t face the fact that he is not, in fact, a special snowflake. He’s just a bog-standard middle-class white guy who thinks he’s an independent thinker because he rejects political correctness, just like tens of millions of other middle-aged, middle-class white guys who share his class and race. The only difference is that he posts here instead of RedState or Free Republic.

  144. 144.

    debbie

    August 20, 2013 at 8:27 pm

    @p.a.:

    Don’t laugh. They made a joke about this dog’s birth certificate on NPR this morning. Out of nowhere.

  145. 145.

    Ted & Hellen

    August 20, 2013 at 8:30 pm

    @Mnemosyne:

    Racist bint.

    Adjust your meds.

  146. 146.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 8:33 pm

    @Ted & Hellen:

    Aww. Truth hurts, doesn’t it, Timmy.

    You’re not special. You’re not different than any other guy your age, race, and class. You’re a dime a dozen, but you hang around here so you can try and make yourself believe that you really are different than all those other guys.

    Go to any comments section of any paper with a story about Trayvon Martin and you’ll see exactly what you’ve been saying here, over and over again. Because what you think about it is exactly what most middle-aged, middle-class white guys think about it. The only thing that makes you feel special and different is that you post here and not at Yahoo! like most of your compatriots do, so you’re not constantly confronted by just how average and dull your beliefs are.

  147. 147.

    Josie

    August 20, 2013 at 8:38 pm

    @Ted & Hellen:
    Wow, you really get nasty when someone gives you a dose of reality and gets too close to the truth. You can say whatever vile thing comes to mind to me, and I won’t answer because that is what you live for, but you are a scum sucking vermin to attack John Cole like that. With friends like you, a person needs no enemies.

  148. 148.

    shelly

    August 20, 2013 at 8:39 pm

    Epic job of working your Obot base, Cole.

    Really? I thought we were being paid by George Soros.

  149. 149.

    Ted & Hellen

    August 20, 2013 at 8:42 pm

    @John Cole:

    Says the fat fuck, food addicted, alcoholic, lonely man who sucked George Bush’s balls for years and helped put many, many thousands in the grave and on crutches and in wheelchairs and psych wards, and who’s never taken a second’s time out from telling everyone on the Intertrons how to think about everything, to take a look at how fucked up his own thinking is.

    All you changed was sides, Cole. You haven’t changed the way you think.

    And the way you think gets people killed.

    Bed pans! Go change some!

  150. 150.

    gbear

    August 20, 2013 at 8:42 pm

    @shelly:

    I thought we were being paid by George Soros.

    We need to face it: 50% of the time we’re being paid by our employers to post here.

    Edit: Wow. Looks like someone’s pee-pee is really hurtin’. John smacked that fastball straight into the pitcher’s gonads.

  151. 151.

    Ted & Hellen

    August 20, 2013 at 8:44 pm

    @Josie:

    PIss off, bint 2.

    The only “nasty” speech you notice here is that directed at people you “like.”

    If there’s anything nasty about Cole and his buds putting thousands in graves and hospitals, it certainly isn’t me mentioning the established fact. Facts make you uncomfortable, do they?

  152. 152.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 8:48 pm

    @gbear:

    I think the polite term is “looks like he pulled a groin muscle.” As Dave Barry said, every man in the stadium knows what exactly happened, because they’re all hunched protectively over their genitals, but for some reason the sportscasters have to say it was a “pulled groin muscle.”

  153. 153.

    pat

    August 20, 2013 at 8:48 pm

    Hmm, just guessing here, but does T&H have some serious psychiatric issues? He certainly seems to hate a lot of people and I’m never sure why.

  154. 154.

    Roger Moore

    August 20, 2013 at 8:50 pm

    @gbear:

    We need to face it: 50% of the time we’re being paid by our employers to post here.

    Speak for yourself. I’m sure it’s substantially higher for some people, and that’s not even counting the paid trolls.

  155. 155.

    gbear

    August 20, 2013 at 8:51 pm

    @Mnemosyne: There’s also George Carlin’s observation regarding how sportscasters have to be careful about the way they use the word ‘balls’. It gets tricky…

  156. 156.

    Josie

    August 20, 2013 at 8:52 pm

    @Mnemosyne: Made me chuckle.

  157. 157.

    Ted & Hellen

    August 20, 2013 at 8:52 pm

    @pat:

    Hmmm…ever notice any of the hatred directed toward me or the few other sane commenters here?

    No? Of course you don’t.

    Anyone else among the FP’s or commenters ever seem to express hatred toward anyone or anything? Ever notice any of that?

    No? Of course you wouldn’t.

    Fuck off.

  158. 158.

    Fluke bucket

    August 20, 2013 at 8:53 pm

    @John Cole: Man, you sure called it. Obviously you have been down this road before.

  159. 159.

    Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader

    August 20, 2013 at 8:53 pm

    @pat: I think he needs to have his groin muscle pulled.

  160. 160.

    sherparick

    August 20, 2013 at 9:04 pm

    @gnomedad: Tucker Carlson, well known douchebag, is the editor and founder of “the Daily Caller” after he lost his gigs on CNN, MSNBC, and even Faux News.

    Having been born and brought up at home plate, he feels that anyone born less then rich and not as pale as he is must have committed a server moral error and be by definition an idiot. Birth and pedigree and deference to your betters is everything.
    ”
    ..Carlson grew up in Carlsbad, an affluent resort town north of San Diego. He is the elder son of Richard Warner Carlson, a former Los Angeles news anchor and U.S. ambassador to the Seychelles who was president of the Corporation for Public Broadcasting and director of Voice of America.[2] His adoptive mother is Patricia Caroline Swanson (born 1945), former wife of Howard Feldman and an heiress to the Swanson food-conglomerate fortune.[2][3] He has a brother, Buckley Swanson Peck Carlson.[4][5] A great-uncle was Sen. J. William Fulbright.[3]

    He attended St. George’s School, a boarding school in Middletown, Rhode Island. After graduation, he majored in History at Trinity College in Hartford, Connecticut…” http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tucker_Carlson.

  161. 161.

    the Conster

    August 20, 2013 at 9:05 pm

    @Ted & Hellen:

    You’re an unexpressed anal gland. Actually, two unexpressed anal glands, and a suppurating pustule.

  162. 162.

    Yatsuno

    August 20, 2013 at 9:07 pm

    @Fluke bucket: Timmeh is nothing if not predictable.

  163. 163.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    August 20, 2013 at 9:10 pm

    Back on the initial subject of the post, on one of the local news broadcasts, they mentioned the dog, then put on some sort of “animal rights” group flack to bitch about how the Obamas didn’t pick a random shelter dog instead.

  164. 164.

    Socoolsofresh

    August 20, 2013 at 9:10 pm

    @Mnemosyne: Oooh schoolhouse rock, burn! Ah just not surprised that Obama wants warrantless cell phone searches. It is consistent with his presidency. But no big deal, amirite?

  165. 165.

    hildebrand

    August 20, 2013 at 9:15 pm

    @Ted & Hellen: I am thinking that what is actually happening is that you are realizing that Cole’s arguments about this case, and the arguments against Snowden and Greenwald, are perfectly valid, and that slowly but surely, you are going to be able to walk away from your evidently faulty reasoning and those things which you believe are facts. It’s a brave step, and we are proud of you. I, for one, think you can do this.

  166. 166.

    sherparick

    August 20, 2013 at 9:16 pm

    @Ted & Hellen: Ummm, do you read what you write or is it just cognitive dissoance. This is what you said to bint 2: “PIss off, bint 2.” Sounds kind of hateful to me. And the there is the “fuck off” and the general use of non sequiters. Of course since the Daily Callers is one big piece of trolling, it is natural we should attract a troll.

  167. 167.

    hildebrand

    August 20, 2013 at 9:19 pm

    @sherparick: No, he is not hateful, he is recovering – the invective is like the poison slowly oozing out of a wound. It will take time, but with this community walking with him, I expect that he will become a nearly fully functional member of society once again. I believe in Ted and Helen.

  168. 168.

    p.a.

    August 20, 2013 at 9:19 pm

    @debbie: ooh! I’m qualified to work at NPR! And I’m not even drunk. Yet.

    Pls. don’t feed the trolls. Just drives the thread off the rails.

  169. 169.

    Ted & Hellen

    August 20, 2013 at 9:23 pm

    Hey, John, per our email exchange, it’s all good.

  170. 170.

    SectarianSofa

    August 20, 2013 at 9:34 pm

    @Ted & Hellen:

    If someone could get a list of the ‘sane’ commenters together for me … that would be, uh, helpful.

  171. 171.

    gbear

    August 20, 2013 at 9:37 pm

    @Ted & Hellen: @Ted & Hellen: Is this your Eddie Haskell imitation?

  172. 172.

    gogol's wife

    August 20, 2013 at 9:57 pm

    @gbear:

    Why, Mrs. Cleaver, what a lovely dress you’re wearing today!

  173. 173.

    nineone

    August 20, 2013 at 10:16 pm

    Looks like Tucker isn’t the only attention hound around here.

    Boom! Yeah, I said it.

  174. 174.

    Ruckus

    August 20, 2013 at 10:19 pm

    @rikyrah:
    Fucker carlson is a racist.

    Some things really are pretty simple, aren’t they.
    And some people, like carlson.

  175. 175.

    Redshirt

    August 20, 2013 at 10:28 pm

    @Ted & Hellen: Good friend of John Cole, everyone! They share emails and everything!

  176. 176.

    Ted & Hellen

    August 20, 2013 at 10:34 pm

    @Redshirt:

    And don’t forget he spends big bucks on artwork that I create!

  177. 177.

    Ted & Hellen

    August 20, 2013 at 10:35 pm

    @Redshirt:

    I’m sorry: Does that upset you?

  178. 178.

    Ripley

    August 20, 2013 at 10:38 pm

    And don’t forget he spends big bucks on artwork that I create!

    John Cole: History’s Greatest Monster.

  179. 179.

    jake the snake

    August 20, 2013 at 10:41 pm

    I don’t suppose that Tucker knows what a “white dog” is.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_Dog

  180. 180.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 10:42 pm

    @efgoldman:

    So was/is it the same troll as Rea1ity Czech and all of its various permutations?

    I think that was a different troll (currently best known as UNLIMITED CORPORATE CASH!) Another of Timmy’s nyms was a kitchen instrument, if that helps sort them out.

  181. 181.

    Ruckus

    August 20, 2013 at 10:45 pm

    @Mnemosyne:
    Actually you can pull a groin muscle when that happens. If you see it coming and can’t get out of the way you can hurt yourself trying to pull everything inside and out of harms way. It’s a reflex that kicks in about age 10-12. Usually from personal experience but if you are lucky it’s from watching it happen to someone else. After that point just thinking about it can cause a pulled groin muscle.

  182. 182.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 10:45 pm

    @jake the snake:

    I love Sam Fuller. Don’t get me started, or I’ll go on and on (and on).

    Hopefully to be addressed on my eventual movie blog (it will mostly concentrate on Pre-Code films, but Fuller’s an interesting case because he made his films independently and they were not subjected to Breen Office pre-production censorship).

  183. 183.

    Ruckus

    August 20, 2013 at 10:48 pm

    @pat:
    You might want to notice that special timmy really, really hates black people most of all. Not sure if he hates them because they are black or because they aren’t white but the effect is the same.
    It really is easy. Pie the motherfucker and ignore him. The only time I see anything he has written is when someone quotes him. Please stop.

  184. 184.

    Redshirt

    August 20, 2013 at 10:50 pm

    @Ted & Hellen:

    Says the fat fuck, food addicted, alcoholic, lonely man who sucked George Bush’s balls for years and helped put many, many thousands in the grave and on crutches and in wheelchairs and psych wards, and who’s never taken a second’s time out from telling everyone on the Intertrons how to think about everything, to take a look at how fucked up his own thinking is.

    All you changed was sides, Cole. You haven’t changed the way you think.

    And the way you think gets people killed.

    Bed pans! Go change some!

    Good friends with John Cole. What a guy! The only one here – Cole included, apparently – that knows and can speak the TRUTH!

  185. 185.

    Ted & Hellen

    August 20, 2013 at 10:52 pm

    @Ruckus:

    Please notice that Ruckus hates puppies and babies most of all. Especially black ones. Black puppies and black babies.

    He hates them.

    Really.

    Cause I say so.

    He hates them.

  186. 186.

    Ted & Hellen

    August 20, 2013 at 10:53 pm

    @Redshirt:

    No, silly. Not the ONLY one.

    ONE of the ones.

    Keep up.

  187. 187.

    SFAW

    August 20, 2013 at 10:56 pm

    I hate Tucker as much as the next person, but I don’t think he’s the author of that thing. Doesn’t make Tucker any less of an asshole, just not for this particular piece of crap.

    Also, maybe I’m misguided, and maybe someone else has already noted it here, but I think the asshole who wrote it was trying to be snarky rather than dog-whistle-y. All the wingnuts think they can be as funny as TBogg, but it usually comes out as a variation of “AAaarrrggghhhhhh! I fucking hate Obama, Demoncrats, and left-wingers. I HATETHEMHATETHEMHATETHEM! Aaarrgghh!!” The words may change, but the underlying theme is always the same.

  188. 188.

    Ruckus

    August 20, 2013 at 10:57 pm

    @John Cole:
    My email allows me to mark any email as junk and have it go to the trash. I’ll bet yours does as well. Seems like it might be worth it.
    OTOH I have seen people quote timmy with very occasionally, valid points. I’m just pretty sure that those few occasional times aren’t worth all the aggravation. Are you trying for an educational moment? Perhaps a come to jesus moment? That seems rather unlikely.

  189. 189.

    nineone

    August 20, 2013 at 10:59 pm

    Yawn. Over-indulged troll over indulges. Same as it ever was. Move along, plebes.

  190. 190.

    Mnemosyne

    August 20, 2013 at 10:59 pm

    @SFAW:

    It’s the kind of bit that Colbert could do and kill with, but Colbert is a genius and I think it’s safe to say that all of Carlson’s hires … aren’t.

  191. 191.

    SFAW

    August 20, 2013 at 11:02 pm

    @Mnemosyne:

    I think it’s safe to say that all of Carlson’s hires … aren’t.

    Maybe we should tell them that the way to blog/literary/conservative immortality is to emulate Breitbart. Completely.

    Wouldn’t solve the world’s problems, but it would be a start.

  192. 192.

    hamletta

    August 20, 2013 at 11:25 pm

    @Mnemosyne: Oooh! Do please start that blog soon!

    I also thought of Sam Fuller, but I was late to the party.

  193. 193.

    Villago Delenda Est

    August 20, 2013 at 11:31 pm

    @The prophet Nostradumbass:

    Well, the reason the Obamas didn’t pick a “random shelter dog” is that there is the small problem of Sasha’s allergies, which preclude that for fairly obvious reasons. In fact, Obama once said he’d like to adopt a shelter dog, but Sasha’s situation made that not feasible.

  194. 194.

    Bostondreams

    August 21, 2013 at 12:14 am

    @Ted & Hellen:

    One of the three killers was, in fact, very white.

  195. 195.

    jayjaybear

    August 21, 2013 at 1:15 am

    Ah, the Daily Caller. Or, as I like to call it, Fucker Carlson’s Nadir of Journalism.

  196. 196.

    MuckJagger

    August 21, 2013 at 1:17 am

    Wow. I don’t know who Hellen is, but I sure do pity her.

  197. 197.

    xenos

    August 21, 2013 at 1:23 am

    @Bostondreams: The white kid was the oldest, too. It is not clear from the news report, but it looks like he was the only one old enough to be driving. I am also curious about the provenance of the rifle.

    There is no racial angle here except one that may reflect badly on whites.

  198. 198.

    burnspbesq

    August 21, 2013 at 2:14 am

    @jl:

    How many popular breeds of dog are white?

    These guys, who happen to be the awesomest dogs that God ever put on this earth.

    http://www.akc.org/breeds/great_pyrenees/index.cfm

  199. 199.

    Irony Abounds

    August 21, 2013 at 2:27 am

    @Ted & Hellen: Damn shame you weren’t a passenger in Michael Hastings’ car.

    Here’s a news flash Sparky: you’re not cool, you’re not intelligent, you’re not a clever troll. You’re just a dick. No more, no less, just a Grade A 100% certifiable dick.

  200. 200.

    Amir Khalid

    August 21, 2013 at 2:43 am

    Has my comment been deleted from this thread? If so, why?

  201. 201.

    AxelFoley

    August 21, 2013 at 3:40 am

    @lamh36:

    lolwut?

    Next thing you know, they’re gonna blame PBO for 9/11. Hell, they tried that shit with Clinton.

  202. 202.

    AxelFoley

    August 21, 2013 at 3:48 am

    @John Cole:

    Cole is a sexy muthafucka when he gets righteous.

  203. 203.

    AxelFoley

    August 21, 2013 at 3:56 am

    @fuckwit:

    Well said. Damn well said.

  204. 204.

    Jebediah

    August 21, 2013 at 5:14 am

    @jl:

    How many popular breeds of dog are white?

    Well, there is the Chuckjuno Hound but that’s not pure white as you can see.

  205. 205.

    dan

    August 21, 2013 at 8:37 am

    @Ted & Hellen: Black kids killed someone. They won’t get away with it. Someone killed a black kid. He got away with it.

  206. 206.

    J R in WV

    August 21, 2013 at 9:34 am

    I see that the article is written by Patrick Howley; I’m not sure that Fucket, er, Tucksalot, er,,, Tucker, damit, Tucker Carlson had anything to do with the darn thing!

    So, you all educate me as to Tucker and what he did have to do with this monstrosity of an racially biased article about a helpless little puppie.

    ETA: @SiubhanDuinne: has educamated us about TUcker and this article on this website – thanks!

    Thanks,
    me

    PS, I looked at the google cache of the story, so Fucket, er, Tucksalot, er,,, Tucker, damit, Tucker didn’t make a click-through from me.

  207. 207.

    J R in WV

    August 21, 2013 at 10:27 am

    @Mnemosyne:

    I’ve been hit in the junk, and it does hurt bad for a little while. I’ve also pulled a groin muscle, and it hurts really bad – for weeks at least. Worse than – strike that, as bad as a lower back injury.

    I suspect all those (male) pro athletes are wearing a cup, so they aren’t as likely to take a hit to their male parts as they are to pull a groin muscle.

    Any pro trainers want to chip in?

    And Timmeh, what a vile turd floating in the cesspool your mind is. Glad I won’t ever meet you and have to refuse to touch your hand. ‘Cause I won’t shake hands with a piece like you.

  208. 208.

    boatboy_srq

    August 21, 2013 at 4:09 pm

    @NotMax: WIN.

    @Jason P.: Indeed. SO: BHO is racist because his dogs are brunette? Really, Twit Tucker?

    Said elsewhere: This is either a) some American (prez or no) paying money to own something black, or b) scandal that BHO didn’t find some white lab, Malamute or pit bull at the DC animal shelter (where they’re presumably free for the adoption). Or what Jason P. said.

    But reading back, it dawns on me that this is more Teahadist pining for a bygone day year era century. Because owning blacks brunettes Other things is wrong somehow. “Dark[haired] is ugly” is SO Elizabethan: methinks somebody needs to [re]read Love’s Labour’s Lost.

  209. 209.

    Soonergrunt

    August 21, 2013 at 5:29 pm

    @Davebo: I saw it on TV so it must be true!

    No, actually, there’s a not insignificant African American population here.

  210. 210.

    Soonergrunt

    August 21, 2013 at 5:33 pm

    @Amir Khalid: There’s nothing in the filters.

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