Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

At some point, the ability to learn is a factor of character, not IQ.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

The low info voters probably won’t even notice or remember by their next lap around the goldfish bowl.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

The poor and middle-class pay taxes, the rich pay accountants, the wealthy pay politicians.

Mediocre white men think RFK Jr’s pathetic midlife crisis is inspirational. The bar is set so low for them, it’s subterranean.

Disappointing to see gov. newsom with his finger to the wind.

When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.

We’re watching the self-immolation of the leading world power on a level unprecedented in human history.

Well, whatever it is, it’s better than being a Republican.

They were going to turn on one another at some point. It was inevitable.

Baby steps, because the Republican Party is full of angry babies.

“In this country American means white. everybody else has to hyphenate.”

Dear media: perhaps we ought to let Donald Trump speak for himself!

Rupert, come get your orange boy, you petrified old dinosaur turd.

Narcissists are always shocked to discover other people have agency.

Republicans are the party of chaos and catastrophe.

Hey Washington Post, “Democracy Dies in Darkness” was supposed to be a warning, not a mission statement.

“Loving your country does not mean lying about its history.”

There are times when telling just part of the truth is effectively a lie.

JFC, are there no editors left at that goddamn rag?

If you thought you’d already seen people saying the stupidest things possible on the internet, prepare yourselves.

The next time the wall street journal editorial board speaks the truth will be the first.

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

You are here: Home / Save the tiger

Save the tiger

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Rand Paul:

Does anybody remember Charlie Sheen when he was kind of going crazy… And he was going around, jumping around saying ‘Winning, winning, we’re winning. Well I kind of feel like that, we are winning. And I’m not on any drugs.

What a spectacle! A bunch of Charlie Sheen-quoting nuts take the country hostage while the national media screams “why can’t Obama lead?”

Update. Charlie’s dad said it best of course.

Reader Interactions

87Comments

  4. 4.

    chopper

    Charlie Sheen when he was kind of going crazy… And he was going around, jumping around saying ‘Winning, winning, we’re winning. Well I kind of feel like that

    U DON’T SAY?

    I’m not on any drugs.

    this must be the shit the D.A.R.E. guys called a ‘natural high’.

  7. 7.

    Ben Cisco

    The comparison he makes is hilarious because 1) it’s accurate 2) for a reason that is ABSOLUTELY escaping him.

    At least Charlie had the drug use as a reason.

  9. 9.

    Villago Delenda Est

    So, Rand the Fuckstick admits he and his fellow dipshits are as crazy as Charlie Sheen.

    Bring the men in the White Coats on to take Rand away to the funny farm.

  11. 11.

    dmsilev

    So apparently the House has just passed Defund Obamacare XLIII, so the next step in the dance will be for the Senate to say “awww, isn’t that cute”, strip it out, and send back a clean continuing resolution.

  13. 13.

    Amir Khalid

    I remember hearing of the pain and embarrassment Charlie’s craziness caused Martin Sheen at the time. But fortunately, Ron Paul will not suffer any such pain and embarrassment, if only because he’s crazy too.

  14. 14.

    What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?

    So suddenly drug addled Hollywood stars are role models for conservative Senators? Good to know. That attack ad writes itself. Rand Paul really is dumber than a box of hammers.

  17. 17.

    Punchy

    Didn’t Chuck lose his high-paying gig shortly after declaring himself a winner? Perhaps comparing the GOP to Chuck will be even more apt after the 2014 middys.

  21. 21.

    beltane

    Someone needs to watch Rand Paul. It’s only a matter of time before the non-drug induced voices in his head tell him to take a dump on the Applebee’s salad bar.

  22. 22.

    Frankensteinbeck

    Recent victories? The GOP has had recent victories? I guess passing yet another dead bill through the House is a victory?

    Now that I think about it, if you’re only looking at what the House passes, the GOP is kicking ASS right now.

  23. 23.

    What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?

    @dmsilev: You have a point. I have to say I haven’t heard much “Why can’t Obama lead” from the MSM this time around, though there’s been a disturbing lack of “republicans in disarray” narrative given all the sniping between republican senators and congresspersons. If the Dmocrats were in this much disarray the “democrats in disarray” message would be cranked up to 11 in the MSM.

  26. 26.

    Amir Khalid

    “This video contains content from Studio Canal, who has blocked it in your country on copyright grounds.

    Sorry about that.”

    Sure you are, Studio Canal. Hmph.

  27. 27.

    Patrick

    while the national media screams “why can’t Obama lead?”

    Don’t forget BENGHAZI, which as I understand it was 100 times worse than Watergate.

  30. 30.

    Tod Kelly

    In a way, it’s kind of the most true thing Rand’s ever said publicly. The GOP today really is just like Charlie Sheen when he was jumping up and down shouting that he was winning.

    I’m not sure there’s a better metaphor out there.

  32. 32.

    ? Martin

    @Frankensteinbeck:

    Recent victories? The GOP has had recent victories?

    At the state level they’re definitely having victories. Granted, if you look at what California is doing (which nobody is) then on a per-capita basis the Dems are probably doing better, but in terms of passing radical legislation the GOP is kicking ass right now in the states. The courts are throwing most of it out, but they are getting their ‘far-right nation’ talking points out there pretty well ATM.

  34. 34.

    Frankensteinbeck

    @? Martin:
    Okay, fair enough. If you think that what the television pundits says is reality, the GOP are ascendant, the entire population agrees with them, and Obama is shivering in fear. The problem is, nobody outside of DC gives a damn what the television pundits say anymore.

  36. 36.

    Patrick

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    and somehow worse than Iraq

    Way worse. Those 4 people that died in Libya are worth more than the 5000 US soldiers or the hundreds of thousands of Iraqis that died in Bush’s war in Iraq. Yes, way worse…

  40. 40.

    Frankensteinbeck

    @Frankensteinbeck:
    That’s what you meant, right? About their far right nation talking points being out? Because outside of the Punditocracy, ‘getting out their far right nation talking points’ seems to mean ‘pushing away more Republican-leaning or uninformed voters every time they open their mouths.’

  41. 41.

    piratedan

    @Ben Cisco: last margin of victory was 50.1 vs 49.9, history is one thing, sometimes demographic shifts aren’t always in the favor of D candidates…. Maybe it’s the candidate, but that last election was…. close.

  42. 42.

    Baud

    Josh Marshall (@joshtpm)
    9/20/13, 12:30 PM
    Jeeeezzz… theyve lost O’Reilly?! >> O’Reilly Blasts GOP Effort To Defund Obamacare As ‘Fanaticism’

  43. 43.

    Gex

    I think it would be much easier to deal with a manic Charlie Sheen hopped up on drugs than the current GOP. I can think of any number of ways that Charlie’s behavior could be influenced with the proper incentives.

  48. 48.

    Tone in DC

    The wonderful folks at CNN were doing their House vote coverage about 90 minutes ago.
    They had two Senate g00pers on to talk about how the upper chamber needs to act on this bill to defund the ACA/fund-the-government-for-another-few-weeks.

    I know better. Watching Leslie Blitzer and that motley crew of fact-free idjits is literally bad for my blood pressure.

    I stood there and watched a few minutes of their panel’s setup, and then the two g00pers. I said to the other guys in the break room, “I am going to ESPN. Anyone mind?” No one said anything, and I changed the channel.

    Can’t take this shit. Wrapping themselves in the flag while they keep their constituents from having healthcare. Lying through their teeth the whole time. No better than watching Dubya do the same thing for 8 damn years.

  49. 49.

    Eric U.

    @What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?: Although it appears that they are, I really don’t understand why the republicans would be in disarray. They are obstructing as much as they can. The only thing is that they keep hurting the people who actually fund them through their debt ceiling shenanigans. Most of those people don’t really care though.

    Yeah, if the Republicans thought that with a filibuster-proof minority in the senate and control of the house it would be as good as controlling the presidency and congress they they are going to be disappointed, but given their actual position it seems like they should be happy.

  50. 50.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @piratedan: Still, couldn’t they arrange to have head colds for this vote? And McIntyre just signed on with Raul Labrador (and Ratzinger Catholic and Lieberman Democrat Dan Lipinski) on a bill to protect anti-gay organizations from…. something.

    @Frankensteinbeck: nobody outside of DC gives a damn what the television pundits say anymore.

    I think VSP consensus is more a symptom than a cause, but most people seem to agree with the chin-strokers and finger-waggers of Sabbath Gasbaggery that Debt, Deficit and Spending are hiding under the bed and waiting to give us all fatal ankle bites

  51. 51.

    max

    ?

    Does anybody remember Charlie Sheen when he was kind of going crazy… And he was going around, jumping around saying ‘Winning, winning, we’re winning. Well I kind of feel like that, we are winning.

    The insane assertion that will have the fish jumping out of the water to grab the hook followed by…

    And I’m not on any drugs.

    …the clue that Paul knows exactly how insane that sounds but he said it anyways because how can the Tea Party attack him for it? How the liberals not attack him for it?

    TTTTTTTTTTTTTTT–TROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLL.

    max
    [‘If we must have a circus, it’s good to see the classic tricks rolled out.’]

  52. 52.

    cckids

    @dmsilev:

    So apparently the House has just passed Defund Obamacare XLIII, so the next step in the dance will be for the Senate to say “awww, isn’t that cute”, strip it out, and send back a clean continuing resolution.

    To me, its more like past time for the Senate to act like the responsible guys in the frat house, strip it out & say “Very funny, stop acting like assholes & do your job.”

  56. 56.

    chopper

    @Karen in GA:

    “remember that dude on bath salts who ate someone’s face? well, we here in the tea party feel like that dude! only…no drugs or anything. but the face-eating crazy shit, yeah. that camera isn’t on, is it?”

  57. 57.

    piratedan

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: hey, I have no issue with that tactic, just saying that Nancy Smash has been known in the past to allow certain members to go do as they wish to cover their prospective patooties in their districts on certain votes. Now does McIntyre really feel this way? I can’t say, I assume he’s a blue dogger like Matthieson. I’d have to go and check on how he voted for ACA and his overall record on how often he denied/defied Pelosi when she was the Speaker to claim if he’s just a DINO in name only.

  59. 59.

    Patrick

    @Tone in DC:

    The wonderful folks at CNN were doing their House vote coverage about 90 minutes ago.
    They had two Senate g00pers on to talk about how the upper chamber needs to act on this bill to defund the ACA/fund-the-government-for-another-few-weeks.

    It’s not just CNN. Pretty much every network always have more Republicans on their panels than Democrats. I haven’t watched national news/Sunday political talk shows from the major networks for over a decade as it is pointless when they for whatever reason think it is a good idea to always have more reps from one party than other party.

  60. 60.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    “Hmm, I disagree with Sheen’s taking lots of drugs to get there policy, but I agree with his acting like a complete lunatic policy!”

    The modern Republican party: All the lunacy without the substance.

  61. 61.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @piratedan: Oh hell, I’m a Pelosi fan, it’s just the “can’t anybody here play this game?” frustration of watching the Democratic party.

  62. 62.

    eemom

    the national media screams “why can’t Obama lead?”

    Who IS saying this?

    I have tuned out the emmessemm for some time now and am much better for it, but I am curious.

  63. 63.

    Frankensteinbeck

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:
    Technically true, but it’s a fact unconnected to anything else. For conservatives it means Poor People Are Taking Our Money, for liberals it means Rich People Aren’t Paying Enough, and for the uninformed it means Can’t We Have Someone Besides Howler Monkeys In Charge? That the debt worries them doesn’t affect their priorities for any other policy.

  65. 65.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @Patrick: Tweety of late seems to have gone back to the old CNN model of pairing Republican operatives with MSM reporters. I don’t know if that’s his bosses’ decision or his bizarre ego where he thinks he’s mixing it up with the professionals

  66. 66.

    reflectionephemeral

    I guess 100% pure resentment-fueled tribalism isn’t a drug, technically, but it doesn’t really encourage responsible behavior nonetheless.

    Funny thing is, David Frum compared the right’s frame of mind to Charlie Sheen’s a little while back, in a post headlined “#winning”:

    I listened to about 45 minutes of the first hour of Rush Limbaugh in the car today. The dominant theme of the hour, repeated over and over: “You” – meaning, Limbaugh listeners – are not “losers.” It’s Obama’s who’s a “loser.” The word “loser” must have been repeated dozens of times, half as reassurance (that’s what you are not!), half as epithet (that’s what President Obama is!) The psychological interpretation of what’s going on here is almost too obvious to remark. But what I can’t decide is whether it’s more sinister or more sad.

  68. 68.

    mdblanche

    @PaulW: I saw a video of Martin Sheen praising President Obama a year or two ago and I thought “there’s someone else who knows what it must be like to be stuck having to try and deal with somebody crazy and/or intoxicated.”

    @piratedan: I think McIntyre is one of the last of a type of conservadem that is now nearing extinction in the wild. The Village collected a number of specimens before it was too late and is now trying to set up a captive breeding program.

  71. 71.

    WereBear

    @Eric U.: The only thing is that they keep hurting the people who actually fund them through their debt ceiling shenanigans.

    This is like kids in a tree house… chopping down the tree. While they are in it.

    If they have a leash, it’s going to get yanked. If they don’t; it’s going to tear the Republican party into big chunky messy pieces.

  72. 72.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @reflectionephemeral: Off the top of my head, Fournier, Woodward, Brokaw and Parson Meacham were all in agreement that gridlock was caused by Obama’s refusal to invite Mitch McConnell to the White House. Chuckie Todd, seeing his shot at being asked to sit at the grown up table, agreed. When the White House released a series of refused invitations issued to McConnell, Todd and Brokaw said those didn’t count because they were formal occasions, not personal invites to the “living quarters”.

    The thing that surprises me, in spite of my long held belief that the most prominent Villagers are intellectually and morally bankrupt, none of these preachers of Comity are phased by the fact that McConnell and Boehner both refused to take Obama’s phone call on election night.

  73. 73.

    Hill Dweller

    I just watched a clip of Special Ed Henry attacking Obama(through Carney) for the economy not improving fast enough and supposedly lying about no one ever using the threat of default to extort preferred legislation. His support evidence was the “fact checker” over at WaPo.

    Jonathan Karl was attacking Obama(through Carney) for causing a default by refusing to negotiate with Republicans.

    Bring on the meteor.

  74. 74.

    nineone

    @? Martin:

    they are getting their ‘far-right nation’ talking points out there pretty well

    the GOP is kicking ass right now in the states

    Yeah, but they suck shit, so there’s that.

  77. 77.

    Patrick

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    When the White House released a series of refused invitations issued to McConnell, Todd and Brokaw said those didn’t count because they were formal occasions, not personal invites to the “living quarters”.

    It is rather amusing to me that Todd said that they didn’t count. Todd himself said it wasn’t up to the media to fact-check. Instead their role was to report verbatim what a politician said.

    And Brokaw doesn’t surprise me since he sucked up to McCain so much in the 2008 campaign.

    Furthermore; where is the fricking rule that says these invitations didn’t count? Why should I take the word of 2 people who I have no respect for whatsoever?

  78. 78.

    PurpleGirl

    OT: (sorry if anyone else has mentioned this)

    The House voted to cut $39/40 Billion from SNAP over 10 years.

    Members approved H.R. 3102, the Nutrition Reform and Work Opportunity Act, in a close 217-210 vote. No Democrats voted for the bill, and 15 Republicans voted against GOP leaders. Six Democrats were not present for the vote (Carolyn McCarthy was absent due to cancer surgery.)

    From various sources including the NY Times, Washington Post, The Hill.

    The bill title is obscene, the bill’s provisions are worse, and while I usually don’t do this, I sincerely wish that every Republican who voted for this bill experiences a financial crises and loses EVERYTHING they have, someone in their family becomes gravely disabled and they are forces to live in their smallest car under a disintegrating bridge.

    ETA: Excuse me, I gotta go find some kittens to watch and cheer me up.

  79. 79.

    Chris

    @dmsilev:

    So apparently the House has just passed Defund Obamacare XLIII, so the next step in the dance will be for the Senate to say “awww, isn’t that cute”, strip it out, and send back a clean continuing resolution.

    What’s really nauseating is the attempt to drastically defund food stamps.

    All in the name of opposing class warfare, of course.

    @Frankensteinbeck:

    Recent victories? The GOP has had recent victories? I guess passing yet another dead bill through the House is a victory?

    Yes, in fact, it is. The teabagger base is baying for blood, and they believe everything they’ve been told about food stamps, Obamacare, etc being what’s destroying the economy. By repeatedly passing those ridiculous bills, teabagger congressmen prove that they’re doing everything they can to fight Obammunism, and that protects them from the threat of being denounced as RINOs and primaried in the next election. The fact that they know the Senate and White House won’t let the bills pass just makes it that much easier, since you know there are no consequences.

  80. 80.

    WereBear

    @PurpleGirl: The bill title is obscene, the bill’s provisions are worse, and while I usually don’t do this, I sincerely wish that every Republican who voted for this bill experie4nces a financial crises and loses EVERYTHING they have, someone in their family becomes gravely disabled and they are forces to live in their smallest car under a disintegrating bridge.

    I’d settle for a series of extremely realistic nightmares where that happened.

  82. 82.

    Patrick

    @Chris:

    The teabagger base is baying for blood, and they believe everything they’ve been told about food stamps,

    The funny thing is that the teabaggers had no problem approving billions in farm subsidies, just as they have had no problem with a single spending bill for defense.

    The teabaggers love spending other people’s money on a big government as long as it is their type of government.

  84. 84.

    nineone

    And I’m not on any drugs.

    Well where’s the fun in that, Randy? Yer dewin’ it rong.

    He sees Ready Teddy is getting all that play. Time to Bigfoot his way in front of the camera and WIN the news cycle. Chuck Todd and the gang are ready to take dictation.

  85. 85.

    What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?

    @Eric U.: there is no reason why, other than that they truly are in People’s Front of Judea vs. The Judean People’s Front territory. They’ve gone so far around the bend ideologically they can’t even get along with one another.

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