Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

A last alliance of elves and men. also pet photos.

Schmidt just says fuck it, opens a tea shop.

If you tweet it in all caps, that makes it true!

And we’re all out of bubblegum.

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

In my day, never was longer.

Roe isn’t about choice, it’s about freedom.

Republicans in disarray!

Insiders who complain to politico: please report to the white house office of shut the fuck up.

Nothing worth doing is easy.

Our job is not to persuade republicans but to defeat them.

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

A sufficient plurality of insane, greedy people can tank any democratic system ever devised, apparently.

Despite his magical powers, I don’t think Trump is thinking this through, to be honest.

I was promised a recession.

Republicans seem to think life begins at the candlelight dinner the night before.

Today’s GOP: why go just far enough when too far is right there?

I didn’t have alien invasion on my 2023 BINGO card.

We still have time to mess this up!

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

“woke” is the new caravan.

Putting aside our relentless self-interest because the moral imperative is crystal clear.

Usually wrong but never in doubt

They love authoritarianism, but only when they get to be the authoritarians.

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79Comments

  25. 25.

    khead

    @raven:

    Yes. The VT kid covered a shitload of ground to get that INT. Also, that Marshall WR is gonna be reliving that last play in his head for a while….

  29. 29.

    Dolly Llama

    Butch Jones is going to have a fucking heart attack on television. I thought “Boom” Muschamp was bad.

  38. 38.

    Keith P

    Bleh, LSU-Auburn isn’t until this evening. My poor Auburn Tigers are probably going to get destroyed (although this is always a good game to bet on the underdog). But at least this season is better than the last one (which did serve the purpose of finally ridding Auburn of Gene Chizik and putting Malzahn where he belongs)

  39. 39.

    raven

    @efgoldman: North Texas is in “Division I Football Bowl Subdivision (FBS), formerly known as Division I-A, is the top level of college football.”

  48. 48.

    Keith P

    @efgoldman: I don’t think it really says much of anything, really. There’s a tradition behind it, but it’s not like 100 years ago, the Auburn regents said, “We suck, so we need an extra mascot to suck less.” It’s like saying “What does it say about a program that doesn’t have an animal as its mascot?” It’s just what it is.

  49. 49.

    Geoduck

    It’s nice to see the Washington Huskies (AKA the Other Dawgs) playing actual football again after years in the wilderness, but.. geez.. there is no enjoyment in watching them steamroll a hopelessly out-matched opponent. Moving on..

  50. 50.

    raven

    War Eagle is a battle cry, yell, or motto not a mascot. Any REAL Auburn fan knows that. My hatred was tempered when we took Raven to their Vet Med School for his cancer treatment, they were great.

  51. 51.

    raven

    In a gesture that organizers hope turns into an athlete-driven national movement, players from Georgia Tech and Georgia and Northwestern took the field Saturday with gear they had marked up to protest the NCAA’s treatment of athletes on issues ranging from concussions to compensation.

    ESPN cameras showed that players, including Georgia Tech quarterback Vad Lee, wrote on their wrist tape “APU” — All Players United — in a game against North Carolina.

    In Georgia’s game against North Texas, at least five Bulldogs offensive linemen joined the protest.

  53. 53.

    The Dangerman

    @efgoldman:

    Damn. Isn’t there a game on that isn’t a blowout or a bore?

    This must be the weekend for shit matchups and/or shit games (Fresno State v Boise last night was fun, however). I’ve found nothing on the schedule for the evening that interests me in the least. Oh, well, I always have my p0rn.

  54. 54.

    Johnnybuck

    I have mixed emotions about this game. On the one hand, I hate Tennessee with the heat of a thousand suns, but good lord are they pathetic. On the other hand, I hate the damned Gators with the heat of 999 suns, both teams are orange, and orange teams are wrong (I think Jesus said that) and in spite of the fact that I would normally pull for the underdog, I simply cannot bring myself to do it. what to do?

  60. 60.

    Betty Cracker

    @Johnnybuck: Strictly from a colors perspective, you should back the Gators, then. Their colors are orange and BLUE, whereas the Vols are just orange.

  61. 61.

    raven

    @Betty Cracker: The Illini are Orange and Blue!

    Hail to the Orange,
    Hail to the Blue,
    Hail Alma Mater,
    Ever so true!
    We love no other
    So let our motto be
    Victory, Illinois! Varsity!

  63. 63.

    raven

    Illinois Loyalty

    Words and music by T.H. Guild, 1907

    We’re loyal to you, Illinois,
    We’re “Orange and Blue,” Illinois,
    We’ll back you to stand ‘gainst the best in the land,
    For we know you have sand, Illinois, Rah! Rah!

    So crack out that ball, Illinois,
    We’re backing you all, Illinois,
    Our team is our fame protector,
    On! boys, for we expect a victory from you, Illinois!

    Che-he! Che-ha! Che-ha-ha-ha! Go Illini, Go!
    Che-he! Che-ha! Che-ha-ha-ha! Go Illini, Go!
    Illinois! Illinois! Illinois!

    Fling out that dear old flag of Orange and Blue,
    Lead on our sons and daughters fighting for you;
    Like men of old, on giants placing reliance, shouting defiance,
    Oskee-Wow-Wow!

    Amid the broad green fields that nourish our land,
    For honest Labor and for Learning we stand,
    And unto thee we pledge our heart and hand,
    Dear Alma Mater, Illinois!

  65. 65.

    pseudonymous in nc

    @efgoldman:

    Damn. Isn’t there a game on that isn’t a blowout or a bore?

    Feels like Designated Cupcake Week, doesn’t it? At least Bumfuck Community College gets its six-figure payoff for being stomped on, though since it pretty much evens out, it’s not like this grade-padding helps anyone.

  66. 66.

    Johnnybuck

    @Betty Cracker: Well, I’m really more into a “can they both lose?” frame of mind. But frankly I’d be happier if Florida was up by 50, not because I want them to win as much as I truly enjoy Rocky Top being completely humiliated. So the Gators are letting me down.

    This Murphy kid looks pretty good.

  67. 67.

    PaulW

    So many games today were total blowouts between Div. 1-A and AA schools. 90 percent of these matchups are totally unfair: these smaller schools only sign up to get the visitors money and rarely come out with an honest chance to win.

    They should schedule conference vs. conference. SEC schools vs. Pac-12, ACC vs. Big 10, to hell with playing FAMU or the Western North Datoka Polytech Lambchops.

  69. 69.

    PaulW

    @Betty Cracker:

    There is not a hell deep enough for Lane Kiffin. I’m not a Vol fan and even to this day I have the fullest sympathy for Tennessee over what that betrayer did to that team.

    Did you ever see the response video on YouTube where the Vol fan pisses on the Kiffin gear?

  72. 72.

    raven

    @PaulW: econ 101 dawg, there is no way these kids could hold up with 12 quality opponents but there is so much money in home games they have to play someone. I don’t like it but it is not going to change.

  75. 75.

    PaulW

    @efgoldman:

    Rays just won today. They’re still holding onto a lead for the Wild Card. So TTTTTHHHHHPPPPPPPT to you.

    As for the Bucs… well, yeah. Schiano is killing the team with ultraconservative offense and undisciplined tackling training.

  79. 79.

    Spike

    Gators get the SEC version of a bye week next, at Kentucky (where our motto remains “Is it basketball season yet?”).

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