Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Nikki Haley, who can’t acknowledge ‘slavery’, is a pathetic shill.

Every reporter and pundit should have to declare if they ever vacationed with a billionaire.

SCOTUS: It’s not “bribery” unless it comes from the Bribery region of France. Otherwise, it’s merely “sparkling malfeasance”.

Authoritarian republicans are opposed to freedom for the rest of us.

“They not like us!” (that’s for sure!)

People are weird.

Trump makes a mockery of the legal system and cowardly judges just sit back and let him.

Cole, when it comes to calico cats, restraint is overrated.

If you are still in the gop, you are either an extremist yourself, or in bed with those who are.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

Bark louder, little dog.

This must be what justice looks like, not vengeful, just peaceful exuberance.

We are builders in a constant struggle with destroyers. let’s win this.

A sufficient plurality of insane, greedy people can tank any democratic system ever devised, apparently.

Speaking of republicans, is there a way for a political party to declare intellectual bankruptcy?

It’s easy to sit in safety and prescribe what other people should be doing.

Every day Vance writes another chapter in the book called “Worst VP Pick Ever”.

These days, even the boring Republicans are nuts.

Let’s not be the monsters we hate.

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

Our job is not to persuade republicans but to defeat them.

You can’t love your country only when you win.

Putin dreamed of ending NATO, and now it’s Finnish-ed.

with the Kraken taking a plea, the Cheese stands alone.

You are here: Home / Politics / Republican Stupidity / The Cheney Wyoming Shitshow Continues

The Cheney Wyoming Shitshow Continues

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In today’s episode, Lynne opens her piehole:

Lynne Cheney, wife of former Vice President Dick Cheney and mother of U.S. Senate candidate Liz Cheney, on Saturday night told former U.S. Sen. Alan Simpson “shut your mouth” about his support for her daughter’s opponent, according to an online account by Simpson’s daughter-in-law.

“So I’m at the Patrons Ball tonight and Lynne Cheney, the mother of Liz, comes up to my father-in-law and tells him to… I believe the direct quote was “Shut your mouth” regarding his support of Mike Enzi,” Deb Oakley Simpson wrote on her Facebook page.

I don’t know how much worse this can get, but I will note that Dick hasn’t done anything stupid lately. I guess it’s time for him to pull out his shotgun and shoot Cowboy Joe at the next UW football game. After which, Liz should do the right thing and euthanize her campaign before the governor signs a proclamation banning her family from the state.

(By the way, the Patrons Ball is a big deal social gala in Cody, the Simpson’s home town, for the Buffalo Bill Historical Center. The Simpsons have been the kingpins in that town since Al’s dad, Governor and Senator Milward, was an attorney there.)

Reader Interactions

68Comments

  2. 2.

    Origuy

    I will note that Dick hasn’t done anything stupid lately.

    Did you miss this?

    Foiling his team’s chances at the One Shot Antelope Hunt in Wyoming over the weekend, the former vice president experienced an equipment malfunction, according to K2TV, which kept his gun from going off. Both Cheney’s teammates, including Wyoming Gov. Matt Mead, hit their bucks.

    Of course, he blamed the gun manufacturer. Note that this was another canned hunt; target shooting with live targets.

  4. 4.

    Roger Moore

    @Origuy:

    the former vice president experienced an equipment malfunction

    Is that what they’re calling it these days? I hear they make pills to help when you suffer from gun malfunctions, like a drooping barrel.

  5. 5.

    The Moar You Know

    Note that this was another canned hunt; target shooting with live targets.

    @Origuy: I’m about ready to give GW Bush a personal pass on the horrors of his administration simply because it has become painfully obvious he’s incredibly, I mean seriously, seriously stupid and couldn’t have come up with 1/10th of the heinous acts they perpetuated.

    It’s kind of obvious where all the evil came from. Canned hunts are merely a species away from shooting puppies.

  7. 7.

    NotMax

    @Origuy

    Foiling his team’s chances at the One Shot Antelope Hunt in Wyoming over the weekend, the former vice president experienced an equipment malfunction, according to K2TV, which kept his gun from going off. Both Cheney’s teammates, including Wyoming Gov. Matt Mead, hit their bucks.

    True to form. He spent 8 years as Veep evading and sidestepping having “The buck stops here” responsibility directly pinned upon him.

  9. 9.

    PurpleGirl

    @Origuy:

    Note that this was another canned hunt; target shooting with live targets.

    I can respect people who hunt — go into a forested area and walk around or sit in tree and look for game to shoot –especially who will eat what they catch and kill. I cannot and will not respect people who pay for a canned hunt. There is no sport if you are guaranteed an animal and a target to shoot at. Cheney has always been a coward and with canned hunts he continues to be a coward.

  10. 10.

    sharl

    In response to “Shut your mouth”, Simpson should have said “but I’m talking about Shaft!”, followed by the rest of his family chiming in “we can dig it!”

    Sure, not very Wyomingish, but would have mellowed out that tense situation straight away! Or maybe Dick would have shot someone.

    One of those.

  11. 11.

    MattF

    What, Lynne hasn’t yet self-combusted, then been dragged through the gates of Hell into Satan’s anus? Tsk.

  13. 13.

    ET

    Mama Cheney can deny it all she wants to but it sure is in keeping with her in particular, and much of that family in general isn’t it? I think she thought nothing of it at the time but it ended up beyond the clickish Republican circle where it was seen (at least by her) ask a-ok, but beyond that not so much.

  14. 14.

    Botsplainer

    @PurpleGirl:

    I can respect people who hunt — go into a forested area and walk around or sit in tree and look for game to shoot –especially who will eat what they catch and kill. I cannot and will not respect people who pay for a canned hunt. There is no sport if you are guaranteed an animal and a target to shoot at. Cheney has always been a coward and with canned hunts he continues to be a coward.

    Canned hunts give me a serious rage.

  15. 15.

    burnspbesq

    There isn’t a dime’s worth of difference between Mike Enzi and Liz Cheney on any policy issue I care about, so excuse me while I don’t give a damn about this silly soap opera. It’s Falcon Crest with cattle instead of grapes.

  16. 16.

    WereBear

    @Origuy: Foiling his team’s chances at the One Shot Antelope Hunt in Wyoming over the weekend, the former vice president experienced an equipment malfunction, according to K2TV, which kept his gun from going off. Both Cheney’s teammates, including Wyoming Gov. Matt Mead, hit their bucks.

    Maybe somebody, liking their face the way it is, made a few adjustments for him.

    For some reason, this post makes me wonder how Lynn & Dick met… you know, he’s checking our fertile ground for deferments, and she is spotted horsewhipping waitstaff… was it Mutual Psychotic Interests at first sight, or what?

  17. 17.

    glocksman

    I’m confused.
    Was Lynne draft deferment number 1, 2, or 3 for Dick?

    Foiling his team’s chances at the One Shot Antelope Hunt in Wyoming over the weekend, the former vice president experienced an equipment malfunction, according to K2TV, which kept his gun from going off.

    Given the guns that he can afford, I highly doubt it malfunctioned.
    The asshole may have forgotten to chamber a round or even missed his shot, but ‘malfunction’ sounds better than ‘I missed’ or ‘I’m the idiot who forgot to load his gun’.

  19. 19.

    legion

    By the way, the Patrons Ball is a big deal social gala in Cody, the Simpson’s home town, for the Buffalo Bill Historical Center.

    So, what you’re saying here is: any competent politico would know not to piss all over the host at a major gathering of all the people you need to support your (otherwise talentless daughter’s) campaign. Duly noted.

  20. 20.

    Syrbal/Labrys

    Wow, it should make me feel sadder that our political life on view in America reminds me more and more of bad prime-time soap operas that I do not watch! But we had the flu here recently, and the Manchild did lie a-dying in front of hours and hours of “Revenge”. Mrs. Cheney would fit right in…

  23. 23.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @burnspbesq: true, but I get some small satisfaction that Dick Sr probably won’t live to see Senator Dick Jr, which I think is what this is all about

  25. 25.

    Chris

    @The Moar You Know:

    Oh hell no.

    Remember “You’re working three jobs? That’s great! Uniquely American, isn’t it?”

    Remember “One of the hardest things in this job is tying Iraq to 9/11?”

    Remember “Some call you the rich, I call you my base?”

    Remember “I don’t spend that much time on [Bin Laden], to be honest?”

    I’m not saying he wasn’t a lazy frat boy who left most of the actual business of governing to his cabinet… but it’s not like he was kept in the dark about any of what was being done, and it’s not like he didn’t have the power to affect it, if he’d cared enough to try. He just didn’t care.

  27. 27.

    mistermix

    @burnspbesq: Here’s why it matters: if LIz’ reputation is completely ruined in this election, we won’t have to deal with Senator Liz Cheney. If Liz would have waited 6 years for Enzi’s retirement (or for him to die in office or resign for health reasons, if the rumors about him are true) she would have been the favorite to win a primary against Loomis for the open seat.

    There’s no chance of Wyoming having a Democrat in the Senate in the near future, but there is a chance of Liz being ruined as a candidate and therefore being denied the platform that a Senate seat would give the Cheney family. The less Cheney in the world, the better, so documenting her every stumble is not only entertaining, it’s good news for liberals.

  28. 28.

    Keith P

    Liz really flying far from the safety of the nest, eh? Keeps her maiden name, works for pops, has mom fight her battles.

  31. 31.

    MomSense

    @Syrbal/Labrys:

    I did the same thing and watched hours of revenge while stuck in bed recovering. Socialite imposter on revenge mission was actually secret Ninja socialite imposter on revenge mission involving massive conspiracy. That show on pain meds is quite the trip.

  33. 33.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @Chris: “Fuck Saddam, we’re taking him out”

    Richard Clarke:

    On September 12th, I left the video conferencing center and there, wandering alone around the situation room, was the president. He looked like he wanted something to do. He grabbed a few of us and closed the door to the conference room. “Look,” he told us, “I know you have a lot to do and all, but I want you, as soon as you can, to go back over everything, everything. See if Saddam did this. See if he’s linked in any way.”
    I was once again taken aback, incredulous, and it showed. “But, Mr. President, Al Qaeda did this.”
    “I know, I know, but – see if Saddam was involved. Just look. I want to know any shred-”
    “Absolutely, we will look-again.” I was trying to be more respectful, more responsive. “But you know, we have looked several times for state sponsorship of Al Qaeda and not found any real linkages to Iraq. Iran plays a little, as does Pakistan, and Saudi Arabia, Yemen.”
    “Look into Iraq, Saddam,” the president said testily and left us.

  37. 37.

    Bobby Thomson

    @mistermix: Nice thought, but we’ll have Liz Ch*ney to kick around in the future, regardless.

    Voters have incredibly short memories, less intelligence, and an enormous capacity to forgive Republicans.

  41. 41.

    David Hunt

    @glocksman:

    Was Lynne draft deferment number 1, 2, or 3 for Dick?

    I don’t know which of his deferments, in any, only required that he be married (Lynne), but Liz was deferment number FIVE. He applied for his last deferment while Lynne was pregnant with Liz to get a “hardship” deferment as a married man with children. After she was born, he passed the age where he was eligible.

  42. 42.

    kindness

    Well she’s a Cheney right? I guess we should all be thankful she didn’t tell Simpson to go fuck himself.

  44. 44.

    Joey Maloney

    @Amir Khalid: Isn’t the ladylike way of saying “go fuck yourself” supposed to be “bless your heart”?

    Only if you have some class. But we’re talking about a Cheney.

  48. 48.

    shortstop

    @amk: Might be more accurate to say that in that marriage, each partner encourages, enables and magnifies the other’s pathologies.

  50. 50.

    shortstop

    @Senyordave: He’s quite, quite horrible. But Liz losing might shut down Pop’s borrowed ticker for good, so there is significant national benefit (in addition to the reasons laid out by mm above) to be gained from Enzi getting reelected.

  51. 51.

    opiejeanne

    @Chris: I remember him saying that and at the time I couldn’t imagine what he was talking about. Still not sure, other than a verbal threat. Was there an actual attempt on Bush Sr?

  53. 53.

    opiejeanne

    @Amir Khalid: I think it’s a Southern thing. The farthest North I’ve heard it used was in Kansas City, MO, which is pretty far north to hear something like that but it was my favorite aunt and I think she heard it and liked it and decided to use it.

  54. 54.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @Senyordave:

    Oh, I don’t know. The Dark Lord, after all, has entered into the mass murder sweepstakes with his role in killing hundreds of thousands in Iraq.

  55. 55.

    Chris

    @opiejeanne:

    Yes, or at least Saddam was accused of it; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_H._W._Bush#Post-presidency

    “In 1993 Bush visited Kuwait to commemorate the coalition’s victory over Iraq in the Gulf War, where he was targeted in an assassination plot. Kuwaiti authorities arrested 17 people allegedly involved in using a car bomb to kill Bush. Through interviews with the suspects and examinations of the bomb’s circuitry and wiring, the FBI established that the plot had been directed by the Iraqi Intelligence Service. A Kuwaiti court later convicted all but one of the defendants. Two months later, in retaliation, Clinton ordered the firing of 23 cruise missiles at Iraqi Intelligence Service headquarters in Baghdad. The day before the strike, U.S. Ambassador to the UN Madeleine Albright went before the Security Council to present evidence of the Iraqi plot. After the missiles were fired, Vice President Al Gore said the attack “was intended to be a proportionate response at the place where this plot” to assassinate Bush “was hatched and implemented”.[131]”

  58. 58.

    Chris

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    Meh, the Palins are the Kardashians of Fox News. Bush may have been a lazy frat boy, but Palin was too lazy to even do what he did (sit in the Oval Office and grin for the cameras) on a much smaller scale for a full term. The Cheneys do more damage.

    @Cervantes:

    I look forward to the Blues Brothers remake in which “Wyoming Republicans” has become the new “Illinois Nazis.”

  59. 59.

    oz29

    Alan Simpson does need to shut his mouth. A few years ago, I sat next to him at a symposium/lecture series at the Idaho College of Law. He was personable, clever, and very “down to earth” — a Westerner in the best sense. An hour later, when the spotlight came on, he defended the internment of Japanese-Americans as necessary to national security, AND as being a boon to the internees.

    In short, fuck Alan Simpson.

  60. 60.

    AxelFoley

    @sharl:

    n response to “Shut your mouth”, Simpson should have said “but I’m talking about Shaft!”, followed by the rest of his family chiming in “we can dig it!”

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  62. 62.

    chopper

    “So I’m at the Patrons Ball tonight and Lynne Cheney, the mother of Liz, comes up to my father-in-law and tells him to… I believe the direct quote was “Shut your mouth” regarding his support of Mike Enzi,”

    the little respect i have for simpson would have gone up at least a notch if his response would have been, in a really low voice, “i’m only talkin’ about mike enzi” and then his daughter could step in and say “we can dig it”.

    ETA: DAMN YOU, SHARL

  63. 63.

    burnspbesq

    @shortstop:

    Are any of your cultural references less than two decades old?

    Here’s one that’s less than two decades old: shove Kanye West’s head up your ass.

  64. 64.

    shortstop

    @burnspbesq: That was all the google could produce for you in your quest for relevance? Were your search terms black men panic old white orange county men?

  66. 66.

    LosGatosCA

    Cheney’s team mates hit their marks, while Cheney’s gun malfunctions?

    Sounds like self defense to me.

    I mean who wants to have to issue an apology from the hospital for blocking Cheney’s shot?

  68. 68.

    Paul in KY

    @kc: Maybe our galactic arm. I have heard the Kghtbxth family on Zorgon 12 in the Perseus Arm are real muthafuckers.

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