Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Boeing: repeatedly making the case for high speed rail.

“Jesus paying for the sins of everyone is an insult to those who paid for their own sins.”

Republicans: The threats are dire, but my tickets are non-refundable!

Lick the third rail, it tastes like chocolate!

When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.

Today’s gop: why go just far enough when too far is right there?

I’m starting to think Jesus may have made a mistake saving people with no questions asked.

One lie, alone, tears the fabric of reality.

If ‘weird’ was the finish line, they ran through the tape and kept running.

Since when do we limit our critiques to things we could do better ourselves?

There is no compromise when it comes to body autonomy. You either have it or you do not.

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

The poor and middle-class pay taxes, the rich pay accountants, the wealthy pay politicians.

I like political parties that aren’t owned by foreign adversaries.

We can’t confuse what’s necessary to win elections with the policies that we want to implement when we do.

But frankly mr. cole, I’ll be happier when you get back to telling us to go fuck ourselves.

Speaking of republicans, is there a way for a political party to declare intellectual bankruptcy?

Polls are now a reliable indicator of what corporate Republicans want us to think.

They are not red states to be hated; they are voter suppression states to be fixed.

Hey Washington Post, “Democracy Dies in Darkness” was supposed to be a warning, not a mission statement.

If you tweet it in all caps, that makes it true!

You know it’s bad when the Project 2025 people have to create training videos on “How To Be Normal”.

If a good thing happens for a bad reason, it’s still a good thing.

“Until such time as the world ends, we will act as though it intends to spin on.”

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51Comments

  4. 4.

    mai naem mobile

    The song for republicans in congress is of course I am an American idiot and speaking of American idiots Doug you really need to troll tweet James Woods. He needs and deserves your special touch.

  6. 6.

    gbear

    I know there’s no YouTube video of ‘I Wanna Destroy You’ by The Soft Boys (Robyn Hitchcock), but if there was, I’d dedicate that song to the house republicans.

  7. 7.

    Jeff Spender

    I love this song, and now Iike it even more.

    Mothet told me yes she told me I’d meet politicians like you

    She always said to stay away you’ll never know what you’ll catch

    Well just the other day I hears of a Palin sighting

    Some Tea Party junk that’s goimg round…

    Cruz is alright, Boehnor’s all right, they just seem a little weird

    Surrender, surrender, but don’t shoot yourself in the head, eeeeeedddd, eeeeeeeeeeeeed.

  8. 8.

    BGinCHI

    I keep wondering about all of the rhetoric that describes this situation as “taking hostages” by the GOP.

    I think it’s correct, but no one seems to point out the obvious. When you take hostages it implies that you are surrounded, outnumbered. It also never works out. It’s the last ditch strategy of people too incompetent to pull off a heist with brains and grace.

  9. 9.

    Mary G

    Oh, my god, the apocalypse is upon us! Roger Simon, in Politico of all places, writes the most scathing indictment of the Republicans I have seen so far:

    Question: If Ted Cruz and John Boehner were both on a sinking ship, who would be saved?

    Answer: America.

    and

    Boehner does not bend to the will of his Kamikaze Caucus because he is an evil man. He does so because he is a weak man. To borrow a line from Theodore Roosevelt, I could carve a better man out of a banana.

  11. 11.

    José Arcadío Buendía

    Did you guys delete an anti-ACA post that was up here or is my reader on crack?

  14. 14.

    Hill Dweller

    @BGinCHI: Benen(@Maddow’s Blog) has a post up about the WHPC throwing a tantrum because PO and Jay Carney were using the word “ransom”. The sociopaths were/are more concerned about tone than the economic damage being inflicted by Republicans.

  16. 16.

    BGinCHI

    @Hill Dweller: Saw that. With NPR leading the charge.

    Double Standard: when GOP opens it’s mouth vitriol comes out (because to the media they are the bad girls of DC High School) but when Dems talk tough it’s negative for the process (because the Dems are the only ones willing to plan the prom and put out the school paper and everything else that smells like Teen Spirit).

    Fucking Shitty Media.

  17. 17.

    Chat Noir

    @BGinCHI:

    It’s the last ditch strategy of people too incompetent to pull off a heist with brains and grace.

    Sort of like “Dog Day Afternoon.”

  19. 19.

    fuckwit

    @Hill Dweller: The media is the most useless fuckers ever to collect MULTI-FUCKING-MILLION-DOLLAR paychecks. I hate them with the heat of a thousand suns. They ONLY care about appearances. WWII memorial! Horserace! McConnel vs Reid cage match!

    Our media is not just incompetent, they’re actively harmful.

  20. 20.

    BGinCHI

    @Chat Noir: Stop reading my mind. Though I don’t think the GOPs are doing it to get a sex change operation for their boyfriends.

    Or are they??!!

  22. 22.

    BGinCHI

    @fuckwit: How long will they get away with serving the drunk then putting him behind the wheel and starting the car?

    It’s criminal.

  23. 23.

    Chat Noir

    @BGinCHI: You never know. And I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s a Republican member of Congress who thinks that Wyoming is a foreign country.

  25. 25.

    jl

    @Hill Dweller:

    From your link:

    ‘ “The president will not pay ransom for … ” Carney began.

    “You see it as a ransom, but it’s a metaphor that doesn’t serve our purposes … ” NPR correspondent Ari Shapiro shouted back with broad support from other confused reporters. ‘

    I would never call on that jackass Shapiro again, unless the opportunity arose to humiliate him in front of the whole country.

  27. 27.

    jl

    @Mary G: Thanks,. I was inspired to search internet to see if there were any banana cocktails. There are quite a few. I found something called banacolada which might be good, for a sissy drink (and I only drink sissy drinks)

  28. 28.

    Amir Khalid

    @lamh36:
    Cool. (When did Jonathan Ross shave his beard?) Me, I’ve been watching this Sandra Bullock video on YouTube. I didn’t know before that her mother tongue was German. Some German commenters even say she has a particular regional accent.

  29. 29.

    fuckwit

    @Chat Noir: No Wyoming. Wyoming’s not a country.

    Except the analogy is not quite right.

    Has anyone ever realized that, if the government stays shut down indefinitely and NEVER gets re-funded, and the default happens, that IS EXACTLY WHAT THE TEABAGGERS WANT??? Like, that’s not a bug, it’s a feature. Like, that’s their whole goal? There is no reason for them to open the government again, EVER? Game, set, match, they’ve won.

    People. Stop for a minute. Realize something important.

    The shutdown, and the default, are not TACTICS to accomplish some goal. THEY ARE THE MOTHERFUCKING GOAL. This is their strategic objective, not a tactic to acheive some other goal. Sure the “moderates” and leadership pretend to negotiate, but they don’t have the power to actually make any deals (we found this out in 2011).

    In other words, Obama doesn’t need to do a damn thing in order for the teabaggers to win the game they are playing. Heads they win, tails we lose.

    Now, what the hell to do about that? I have no idea. I do not know what the end game could possibly be here that keeps the United States of America functioning as a country. All of the options are bad.

    This is literally a suicide bomb terrorist situation, and the teabaggers have the vest ready to blow. If they pull the pin they blow up and they get 70 virgins. They simply do not care. There is nothing they will accept. They don’t even really have demands. There is no negotiating with them. They want to die, and they want to take a bunch of us out along with them. Ted Cruz is up there screaming ALLAHU ACKBAR at the top of his lungs, with Grover Norquist cheering him on from his bunker in Afghanistan.

    This is way scarier than 9/11. because it’s slow motion, and possibly as many or more people will die, though really slowly, not in an instant. This is like, the plane is on its way to hit the buildings, and we’re watching it.

  30. 30.

    TooManyJens

    “You see it as a ransom, but it’s a metaphor that doesn’t serve our purposes … ” NPR correspondent Ari Shapiro shouted back

    Oh God, read the whole transcript. I’m picturing the WHPC with their open mouths turned skyward like baby birds, waiting for Carney to drop pre-digested food in (but only the right pre-digested food, thanks! They have standards!)

    Q You see it as a ransom, but it’s a metaphor that doesn’t serve our purposes of figuring out what’s actually going on.

    Q We just don’t want to write it wrong.

    MR. CARNEY: But you guys are just too literal then, right?
    Q We just want to accurately report what’s happening.

    MR. CARNEY: The closing of the American mind and failure to appreciate metaphor and simile.

    Q Can you just break it down in regular terms?

  32. 32.

    José Arcadío Buendía

    NPR is the reason so many people think all liberals are cheese-eating surrender monkeys.

  34. 34.

    fuckwit

    @BGinCHI: In November 2014. Actually, not until January 2015, best case. What happens until then? How will we survive until then? I will make a prediction: the government stays closed AND the debt ceiling stays unraised until then. If you can show me how this gets resolved in any other way without massive collateral damage to either the economy, huge segments of our population, the poor, or the Constitution (or all of the above), I’d love to be wrong.

    I think we are dealing with an apocalyptic cult that simply wants to keep the destruction going. They can’t be negotiated with and they’ve maneuvered themselves into a position of power from which they cannot be dislodged lawfully until January 2015.

  35. 35.

    Shakezula

    Q You see it as a ransom, but it’s a metaphor that doesn’t serve our purposes of figuring out what’s actually going on.

    Q We just don’t want to write it wrong.

    I can’t imagine uttering those words, never mind not dropping dead of embarrassment if, due to some combination of drugs, demonic possession, mind control rays and brain trauma, I did happen to utter them.

  36. 36.

    jl

    @TooManyJens:

    ” We just want to accurately report what’s happening. ”

    What the hell does that question imply?
    That the GOP can just say whatever and it gets reported breathlessly, and the WH is responsible for telling the reporters what reality is?

    I would have said “what is really going on, you dingbat, is that the WH consider’s it ransom, and I just said that. You want me to write it out for you?”

    But that would be a short lived press secretary.

    I’d also ignore the big media national affairs press, and call on any special interest or local reporters who were in the room. Tigerbeat, TV Guide, Northwest East Nohwere Horseshoe and Snipe Hunt Bimonthly. Whatever.

  37. 37.

    Shakezula

    MR. CARNEY: The closing of the American mind and failure to appreciate metaphor and simile.

    They didn’t even realize he’s just kicked their professional pride in the balls.

    Q Can you just break it down in regular terms?

    Yeah. And when the next TEAOP head case claims Obama is worse than 100 Hitlers, you can bet these whiny ass pimples won’t be saying “What does that meeeeeeeaaaan??”

    It really is horribly embarrassing to see what’s risen to the top in America’s press.

  38. 38.

    BGinCHI

    @fuckwit: You may be right that the next year or so is the chemo that will cure the body politic of the TP cancer.

    Whatever it takes.

  39. 39.

    jl

    @Shakezula:

    ” It really is horribly embarrassing to see what’s risen to the top in America’s press. ”

    But not surprising. You let giant mega corporations take over the news, you see abject and patent corporate hacks fill all the important positions.

  40. 40.

    fuckwit

    @BGinCHI: I would hope that you are a rich man and you can accept that so effortlessly. I am not so lucky. A year of economic destruction would be hell on earth for me, and many others. I very recently crawled my way out of poverty. I have medical issues that I’m hoping I can finally get insurance now to help handle. This is not a motherfucking game for me.

    @Shakezula: What he means is, “Can you say it in a more both-sides-do-it, milquetoast, totebagger, don’t-offend-the-delicate-sensibilities-of-our-corporate-sponsors, useless NPR way for me? So I don’t have to write icky mean nasty words like ‘ransom’? Please?” Beyond pathetic, merely contemptible.

  41. 41.

    Shakezula

    @jl: True, but these hacks also suck and they don’t even realize they suck. A reporter announcing he doesn’t understand metaphor is like an attorney saying he doesn’t know the difference between criminal and civil law.

  42. 42.

    richard mayhew

    I made a serious error of fact so I pulled it down until I can strike through the now dumb parts of the analysis

  43. 43.

    Shakezula

    What he means is, “Can you say it in a more both-sides-do-it, milquetoast, totebagger, don’t-offend-the-delicate-sensibilities-of-our-corporate-sponsors, useless NPR way for me? So I don’t have to write icky mean nasty words like ‘ransom’? Please?” Beyond pathetic, merely contemtible.

    If that’s what he wanted he could have kept asking questions until Carney said something that was palatble, or just paraphrased Carney and then gone elsewhere for the other side of the Both Sides Do It equation. Or just editorialized. “Carney called it a ransom, but a closer look at the issues suggests this is an oversimplification of the current situation on the Hill … blah blah fap.”

    The idea that a reporter would come out and ask someone to create a quote that they like (or their editor will like) is a step below what goes on at Faux.

  47. 47.

    Origuy

    I made a serious error of fact so I pulled it down until I can strike through the now dumb parts of the analysis

    You’ll never make it in the MSM with that kind of behavior.

  49. 49.

    Denali

    @Fuckwit,
    I have this sinking feeling that you are right. These people really want no government- except wars and War Memorials.

  50. 50.

    Denali

    @Fuckwit,
    I have this sinking feeling that you are right. These people really want no government- except wars and War Memorials.

  51. 51.

    Denali

    @Fuckwit,
    I have this sinking feeling that you are right. These people really want no government- except wars and War Memorials.

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