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You are here: Home / Pet Blogging / Dog Blogging / Shake It, Bay-Bee! (Open Thread)

Shake It, Bay-Bee! (Open Thread)

by Betty Cracker|  October 22, 20131:04 pm| 121 Comments

This post is in: Dog Blogging, Open Threads

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Via Today, a video of dogs shaking water and/or drool all over the place:

The biggest, drooliest one is French mastiff with the fancy-sounding appellation “Dogue De Bordeaux.” Lately, the mister has been trying to talk me into adding a mastiff to our menagerie: Apparently he feels outnumbered since all the residents of our homestead aside from himself are female — yes, even the chickens.

I’m not sure how having a male dog on the place (in an “altered” state!) would really address the gender imbalance, but in any case, why a mastiff, I wonder? We’ve always had boxers, and the mister is the driver behind that — his family have all been boxer people from way back. That’s fine with me; boxers are wonderful dogs.

But if I were comparing traits of other types of dogs to add to the mix, MORE JOWLS! wouldn’t be on my list. Nor am I thrilled about the prospect of having a dog that outweighs me by a hundred-plus pounds competing for couch space. Anyone here friends with a mastiff?

Please feel free to discuss whatever.

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Reader Interactions

121Comments

  1. 1.

    Steeplejack

    October 22, 2013 at 1:11 pm

    I have a rule about never having a pet that takes a bigger dump than I do. Unless it knows how to use the toilet. I think mastiffs do not make the cut.

  2. 2.

    Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader

    October 22, 2013 at 1:11 pm

    You have Menagerie, I have Animal House.

  3. 3.

    Elizabelle

    October 22, 2013 at 1:12 pm

    Had a friend with a mastiff she adored. Lovely dog.

    Some downsides to having a huge dog, IMHO:

    ** being able to maneuver the dog, should it become ill or injured

    ** it eats A LOT

    ** having to pick up giant-sized leavings

    ** kennel boarding fees are often assessed by weight, never mind if you ever have to send the pup on a plane

    ** really big dogs often have hip joint problems and shorter lifespans. With some breeds, their hearts have to work too hard (thinking of Irish Wolfhounds here). Seven to nine years is short.

    ** along with that, they sometimes learn more slowly, and are real issues as you house and leash-train them. (A friend has a Bernese Mountain dog that — while beautiful — is dumb as can be, and irritable. Not usual for the breed, I think.)

    Love boxers — they are great dogs — but I’m happy with pups not much bigger than a beagle.

    YMMV.

  4. 4.

    Elizabelle

    October 22, 2013 at 1:13 pm

    @Steeplejack:

    So true!!

  5. 5.

    Comrade Mary

    October 22, 2013 at 1:13 pm

    As you get older, the prospect of having a creature in the house with MOAR JOWLS starts to sound a little more appealing. Or so I hear.

  6. 6.

    Face

    October 22, 2013 at 1:19 pm

    Good luck trying to control a Mastiff on a walk, lest one see and want to quickly follow a rabbit, raccoon, or teabagger. Gentle leaders are almost required. Hell of a workout.

    Yeah, and the drool amounts and crap sizes are simply unfathomable.

  7. 7.

    CzarChasm

    October 22, 2013 at 1:19 pm

    Comrade Mary I suspect anti-aging superstitions surround the slobber from MOAR JOWLS.

    New Whatever to discuss: Virginia (current home base) is getting a lot of press about its gubernatorial race ‘twixt McCauliffe (aka The Connected One) and Cuccinelli (aka Kookynelli). It’s great fun, but it drowns out other races. What other gubernatorial races are going on in other Laboratories of Democracy?

  8. 8.

    Amir Khalid

    October 22, 2013 at 1:20 pm

    Just out of curiosity, how much clearance do you need to give a dog to be out of range?

  9. 9.

    MomSense

    October 22, 2013 at 1:20 pm

    Growing up we had a St. Bernard AKA drool factory. He was such a fantastic dog but I think every surface in our house was covered in slime.

  10. 10.

    Paul in KY

    October 22, 2013 at 1:20 pm

    Haqve you ever seen the pile or crap one mastiff can put out? Take all 5 boxers & pile all their crap toghether (as a mental exercise only) & that would be about the size of one mastiff crap.

  11. 11.

    scuffletuffle

    October 22, 2013 at 1:21 pm

    Video brought back many fond memories of my Clumber Spaniel who, after drinking, would come looking for her own personal napkin…my crotch!

  12. 12.

    Paul in KY

    October 22, 2013 at 1:21 pm

    @Steeplejack: Man. I made my comment before seeing yours.

    Great minds & all that :-)

  13. 13.

    The Red Pen

    October 22, 2013 at 1:22 pm

    Today’s Buttersafe.

    I thought it was particularly good.

  14. 14.

    mike with a mic

    October 22, 2013 at 1:28 pm

    My friend has one. He weighs more than me and is amazing. Nice, easy going, relaxed, and impossible to get riled up… though I guess if I was a mastiff not much would get to me either.

    A bonus, kids can ride him like a pony and he won’t even know they are there.

  15. 15.

    SmallAxe

    October 22, 2013 at 1:29 pm

    Own a Boerboel (South African mastiff) best dog I’ve ever had even with the drool problem. There’s a great Boerboel rescue unit based in MD too. Key to the couch/bed is don’t let em up there as puppies and they’ll stay at your feet. They bond great with family and other pets, more active less heavy (still approx. 175lbs) than English Mastiffs and similar (less jowls) to the dog de Bordeaux which one of our neighbors has.

  16. 16.

    Redshift

    October 22, 2013 at 1:31 pm

    @CzarChasm:

    It’s great fun, but it drowns out other races. What other gubernatorial races are going on in other Laboratories of Democracy?

    Only Virginia and New Jersey have off-year gubernatorial elections. VA isn’t drowning out anything, it’s the only thing to talk about, since New Jersey’s is (unfortunately) a blowout.

  17. 17.

    PhoenixRising

    October 22, 2013 at 1:31 pm

    Mastiffs are…how do I say this delicately…not as smart as Danes.

    The Dane we’ve had for 18 months is not the smartest dog we’ve ever had, by any stretch.

    So: Giant poo, which your kid is on the verge of too old to be made to pick up (mine makes $5 for each yard cleanup, about once a week, which is the minimum to avoid the health dept. shutting us down). Lots of slobber. Slow learners. Tough to manage on leash.

    The upsides to giants: Short time commitment. We started with an adult from rescue, and less than 2 years later have an old dog. The vet says our small dog (16 pounds, poodle mix, child picked him, he’s an argument against anyone ever allowing a male dog indoors) has another 2-3 rescue Danes in him.

    I cried when she told me that.

  18. 18.

    Death Panel Truck

    October 22, 2013 at 1:32 pm

    Cocker spaniels are about as jowly a dog I am willing to live with. We have two, and their thing is to drink lots of water and then run their snouts along the edge of the sofa cushions to dry them off.

  19. 19.

    Botsplainer

    October 22, 2013 at 1:36 pm

    When I got my current dog, his potential weight was a factor I considered. My last dog weighed in 110 on a general basis. He was a fattie, and should have been 85-90 (big for a Groenendael, and outside breed standard). I carried him up and down stairs, picked him up off the floor to get him going in the morning, etcetera. It was hard work, and I figured I only have one largish dog left in me reliably.

    The Tervuren pup probably won’t creep much over 65, like his dad. His largest male ancestors measured in at a manageable 75. When I go through that with him, I’ll be in my mid 60s.

  20. 20.

    Patricia Kayden

    October 22, 2013 at 1:37 pm

    I have a friend with a female American Mastiff — she’s a darling. She’s around 120 pounds and probably has a few more pounds to put on since she’s not full grown yet. I would get a Mastiff with her demeanor although like Betty, I love Boxers.

  21. 21.

    Yatsuno

    October 22, 2013 at 1:38 pm

    First dog growing up was a Newfoundland. I am of the opinion everyone’s first puppeh should be a Newfie. She was 150 lbs of gentle fun wuv. Come to think of it, I don’t know how they got her off Hawai’i…

  22. 22.

    kindness

    October 22, 2013 at 1:40 pm

    I prefer mutts.

  23. 23.

    raven

    October 22, 2013 at 1:42 pm

    @Death Panel Truck: And get their cocker ears in the bowl!

  24. 24.

    raven

    October 22, 2013 at 1:43 pm

    @Yatsuno: Lil Bit thinks she’s a Newfie!

  25. 25.

    Freemark

    October 22, 2013 at 1:48 pm

    Next door neighbor has a pony mastiff. Wonderful, gentle, intimidating dog, kinda like Michael Clarke Duncan in Green Mile. Can be a great working dog, excellent in pulling out tree stumps, pulling wagons, and pulling shoulders out of joint. And as previous commentors mentioned, they make great mobile fertilizer factories.

  26. 26.

    PaulW

    October 22, 2013 at 1:49 pm

    My cat is sleeping too much and not waking up to eat her food. She’ll do some eating… but she’s more tired than anything. I’m worried.

  27. 27.

    Betty Cracker

    October 22, 2013 at 1:51 pm

    @Botsplainer: That’s a great point. Our late, lamented male boxer was largish (85 pounds), and when he became elderly and infirm, I had a helluva time loading him in the car, etc., by myself. From what I understand, it’s not unusual for a male mastiff to weigh 250 pounds!

    Our current pair of female boxers weigh around 60-65 each, and they’re a bit on the portly side, but manageable. If it were up to me (and it is! at least partly!), we’d stick with boxers. I’m sure mastiffs are great dogs, but they sound like too much dog for me.

  28. 28.

    chopper, interrupted

    October 22, 2013 at 1:51 pm

    my old bulldog-boxer mix was insanely drooly. when he shook we actually got slobber on the ceiling and we had 12-foot ceilings.

  29. 29.

    raven

    October 22, 2013 at 1:51 pm

    @Freemark: Dog shit does not make good fertilizer.

    http://voices.yahoo.com/common-misconceptions-dog-feces-fertilizing-1285581.html

  30. 30.

    Death Panel Truck

    October 22, 2013 at 1:51 pm

    @raven: True. My wife bought them a big-ass water bowl, so they can’t help but dunk their ears.

  31. 31.

    another Mildred

    October 22, 2013 at 1:51 pm

    As a Newf addict, I can’t think how they made a drool vid without including a Newfy. Anyway, flews rock. As do Newfs and all the giant breeds (Molossers).

  32. 32.

    aimai

    October 22, 2013 at 1:54 pm

    @Comrade Mary: Why is the song “If you like it better put a ring on it” sounding in my ears with your comment?

  33. 33.

    J.W. Hamner

    October 22, 2013 at 1:54 pm

    Reminds me of a Vitalic video with dogs jumping around in super slow mo… but with significantly less French techno and laser beams.

  34. 34.

    Bunter

    October 22, 2013 at 1:56 pm

    @Amir Khalid: There is no safe range. My bloodhound can fling drool up onto my 9 1/2 ft ceilings and I’ve had friend who say it’s on their cathedral ceilings. The thing with drool is that it’s not all the same consistency so when they shake it can arc up and out for many feet. Basically, if you’re anywhere within 10-15 feet of my dog and he shakes, there’s a good likelihood you’ll get drool on you.

  35. 35.

    raven

    October 22, 2013 at 1:56 pm

    @Death Panel Truck: They have cocker bowls for water and food but we have a spaniel and a mutt so we just let it rip.

  36. 36.

    Trollhattan

    October 22, 2013 at 1:57 pm

    @Yatsuno:

    Friends had a Newfie and a Rottweiler. The favorite game was to rile the Rotty so she’d go for your feet and have the Newfie pull her away, “Don’t do that, it’s a HUMAN!” The lifeguard instinct is quite strong.

    Talk about a slobberfest.

    Once took them for a long walk and I had Pearl, the Newfie. On leash she was a slow lug who I basically had to coax forward the entire walk, right until she spotted…SQUIRREL. I might as well have been a leaf, so easily did she drag me to a tree thirty feet away.

    My rule ever since: never own a dog that exceeds more than half my weight. You never know when you’ll really, truly need to control it, and they’re a lot stronger than you think.

  37. 37.

    shelly

    October 22, 2013 at 1:57 pm

    What other gubernatorial races are going on in other Laboratories of Democracy?

    Yeah, Christie’s pretty much a shoe-in. Why do you think he dropped his appeal against same-sex marriage? A win-win. He can say to the wingnuts, ‘See? I tried to stop it but the court overruled me.” And to the libs ” I won’t stand in it’s way; I’ll uphold the law.”

  38. 38.

    mike with a mic

    October 22, 2013 at 1:58 pm

    One of the best dogs I ever owned has a lot of mastiff blood in it, dogo argentino. It’s a dog for hunting wild boars and mountain among other things, and it’s huge. Great pet though, and despite the size adjusted really well to apartment life with long walks along the river. Got along with everyone, didn’t mind other dogs…. though I’m guessing if he saw a boar it would have been game on.

    The downside is that they scare the crap out of people. Picture a solid white pitbull the size of a mastiff to get an idea. They were made by crossing a (now extinct) fighting dog with various bulldogs, mastiffs, boxer and mountain hunting/herd protection dogs. The general purpose is to hunt down wild board, and protect live stock from mountain lions.

    Though if you really want a crazy dog look up the caucasian shepherd, which is a dog used for hunting bears in various former parts of the USSR.

  39. 39.

    schrodinger's cat

    October 22, 2013 at 1:59 pm

    I finally wrote up the final installment of my camping trip in the Mohawk Trail State forest. Has photos but no kittehs.

  40. 40.

    The Pale Scot

    October 22, 2013 at 1:59 pm

    All the mastiffs and newfies I’ve known have been squishy horses of love, chase a rabbit? That requires running, doesn’t happen. Some of the joint issues can be avoided by stopping them from jumping off stuff and going down stairs. If you’re the tidy sort the drool that’s produced by a mastiff in Florida is going to be a problem. It may not be fair to a mastiff to bring one down here. The big guys at the dog park here charlotte co. always look like they’re dying unless it’s Jan.

    If the mister is looking for a mate to be drinking with, a male scottie has the attitude to be interesting, if you can handle the dismissive “these bi-peds aren’t too bright” looks all the time.

  41. 41.

    shelly

    October 22, 2013 at 2:04 pm

    This makes me think of David Sedaris’ story about his parents getting a Great Dane. When his father took him for a walk, everyone would, of course, say ‘Hey, who’s walking who?” and laugh as if they were the first to say it. Oh, and “Why don’t you put a saddle on that thing!”

  42. 42.

    Elizabelle

    October 22, 2013 at 2:08 pm

    Dogs, yes, but this just is not a good “eating lunch” thread.

    OT, peripheral to the Virginia governor’s race

    The Associated Press has dismissed a veteran political reporter and an editor based in Richmond over an error about Democratic gubernatorial nominee Terry McAuliffe in an Oct. 9 story.

    The AP fired reporter Bob Lewis and Dena Potter, AP’s news editor for Virginia and West Virginia, a source said.

    …. AP erroneously reported the evening of Oct. 9 that documents in a federal fraud case in Rhode Island alleged that McAuliffe “lied to a federal official” investigating Joseph Caramadre, a Rhode Island estate planner who is accused of defrauding terminally ill people.

    In a bulletin that night killing the story about 90 minutes after it was first posted, AP said “the indictment did not identify McAuliffe as the ‘T.M.’ who allegedly lied to investigators.”

    Leading Democratic and Republican politicians, and other journalists, praised Lewis for being a professional and fair-minded reporter.

    Meanwhile, Ron Fournier racked up 20 years at AP.

    And Jonathan Karl is still at ABC News, as White House Correspondent.

    What gives, and why were these two fired?

  43. 43.

    schrodinger's cat

    October 22, 2013 at 2:09 pm

    You can also has kitteh,an unimpressed kitteh with MoU+Bobo hybrid (bogus social anthropology + word salad) from Bangalore in the Sunday edition of NYT .

  44. 44.

    schrodinger's cat

    October 22, 2013 at 2:12 pm

    I lubs big dogs, they are so gentle especially Newfs and St Bernards. Want!

  45. 45.

    Citizen_X

    October 22, 2013 at 2:12 pm

    @Yatsuno:

    Come to think of it, I don’t know how they got her off Hawai’i…

    A Newf? She probably swam to the west coast.

  46. 46.

    MikeJ

    October 22, 2013 at 2:13 pm

    @CzarChasm:

    What other gubernatorial races are going on in other Laboratories of Democracy?

    We have goobers, but no gubernatorial race. Seattle mayoral election is going on, along with the annual stupid initiative parade. The worst initiative is the initiative initiative, giving initiative backers 16 months (up from the current ten) to collect enough signatures to get on the ballot. This initiative is of course, backed by Tim Eyman, who always has anti-government initiatives on the ballot.

  47. 47.

    ranchandsyrup

    October 22, 2013 at 2:14 pm

    My glibertarian silicon valley friends are super excited that the valley is discussing a version of going galt. They seem to think that people like computers and tech so that will whitewash the ugliness of objectivism/glibertarianism. OY.

  48. 48.

    mike with a mic

    October 22, 2013 at 2:19 pm

    @ranchandsyrup:

    I’ve long thought the end game is going to be simple. Eventually machines are going to replace the need for most labor, even most white collar labor. With the threat of socialism and capitalism gone there’s no need for them to keep around the new deal or give us anything else. We will simply be using resources and sucking up air.

    I think the elite know this, that everyone but the 1% won’t be needed or wanted shortly. If people think the Koch’s are bad they have no idea the amount of horrible shit (conflict minerals make conflict diamonds look nice, and the fossil fuels burned to fuel tech would have you hating them more than Exxon) their favorite brands like apple and google are.

  49. 49.

    Rosalita

    October 22, 2013 at 2:19 pm

    Drool makes me queasy…

  50. 50.

    chopper, interrupted

    October 22, 2013 at 2:20 pm

    @ranchandsyrup:

    With 3D printing, regulation is being turned into DRM. With quantified self, medicine is going mobile. With Bitcoin, capital control becomes packet filtering.

    lol, good luck with that shit. especially your fly-by-night ‘currency’ tracked by a Magic: The Gathering website.

    “oh no! the army is moving in after we declared independence. quick, let’s use our 3-D printers to print some flimsy plastic swords!”

  51. 51.

    MikeJ

    October 22, 2013 at 2:24 pm

    @chopper, interrupted: The thing anarchists, techo or old school, need to realise is that there is going to be a government. Attempting to do away with government only ensures that you have no say in it.

  52. 52.

    Trollhattan

    October 22, 2013 at 2:27 pm

    Least surprising news item of the year, so far.

    Sparks police: Middle school shooter got gun from home

    Authorities say the student who opened fire on a Nevada middle school campus, wounding two students and killing a teacher, got the weapon from his home.

    Washoe County School District Police said Tuesday they are still working to trace where the gun was bought. Police said a Sparks Middle School student was the lone shooter and turned the weapon on himself.

    Authorities say they’re not naming the student out of respect for his family. Police say 45-year-old math teacher and former Marine Michael Landsberry tried to stop the rampage before he was fatally shot. The teacher, who authorities said coached several sports, was being hailed for trying to protect students from a shooting that was witnessed by 20 or 30 children.

    Once a Marine, always a Marine. Bless you, Michael Landsberry.

    How long unitl not-a-Marine Wayne LaPierre issues “must arm 8th graders to protect 8th graders from 8th graders” statement?

  53. 53.

    ranchandsyrup

    October 22, 2013 at 2:27 pm

    @mike with a mic: If they “go galt” before that tipping point, it would mitigate against the death of the safety net, no?

    @chopper, interrupted: Heh. These guys don’t think that far down the road (for some reason). Once they get to their utopia, everything will be perfect, somehow….

  54. 54.

    Death Panel Truck

    October 22, 2013 at 2:27 pm

    @MikeJ: Some of those initiatives were just plain ridiculous. “The legislature passed, without a vote of the people…” Must have been five beginning with that phrase. To which I say, well, duh. Legislatures are allowed to pass laws from time to time.

  55. 55.

    The Pale Scot

    October 22, 2013 at 2:28 pm

    @ranchandsyrup:

    No technological change would have more effect on the living standards of struggling Americans than improvements in energy and food, which dominate the economy and drive up prices. “That’s not one I focus on as much,” Thiel admitted. “It is very heavily politically linked, and my instinct is to stay away from that stuff.”

    How do these twits propose to defend themselves from the starving hordes? Mercenaries? The Romans, among may others, already tried that. They think that an economy built on making toys for the elites is sustainable. That farmers are going to be interested in trading crops for iPhones. Anybody have a good rock I can crack this thigh bone with?

  56. 56.

    Josie

    October 22, 2013 at 2:30 pm

    @Betty Cracker: You are wise to consider size, Betty. My last dog, Teddi, was an Akbash (goat guarding dog) and weighed 140 pounds. She was the best dog I ever had and was my closest companion for 14 years. The last few years were very difficult, however, due to terrible joint issues. I gave her increasingly strong medication until she reached the point of absolutely not being able to stand up, no matter what. My sons had to lift her into the car to take her to the vet and we all cried. I still miss her a year and a half later, but I would not get a big dog again. It is just too hard to take care of them when they go downhill.

  57. 57.

    Belafon

    October 22, 2013 at 2:32 pm

    @ranchandsyrup: Snow Crash is not a documentary.

    ETA: And neither is the Diamond Age.

  58. 58.

    ranchandsyrup

    October 22, 2013 at 2:34 pm

    @The Pale Scot: It’s like they’re counting on people not recreating the French Revolution because it was done by the icky French that eat snails and make love with their faces and surrender.

  59. 59.

    ranchandsyrup

    October 22, 2013 at 2:35 pm

    @Belafon: LOL. True that.

  60. 60.

    Anya

    October 22, 2013 at 2:37 pm

    Newsmax headline:” ‘Loophole’ from Obama’s IRS: Move Your IRA to Gold.” I didn’t know Obama had a special IRS.

  61. 61.

    FlipYrWhig

    October 22, 2013 at 2:38 pm

    @PaulW: I’m no expert, but when our late cats acted like they were tired all the time, for one of them it was thyroid, which is treatable with a crushable pill. For the other it was kidney trouble, which is harder to treat. At any rate, the term that seemed to get our vet more engaged with a treatment plan was “lethargic,” as opposed to just plain “tired.” Hope that helps…

  62. 62.

    JPL

    October 22, 2013 at 2:51 pm

    Do not under any circumstance get a terrier. I have about a half acre fenced with lots of trees. Mr. Finch loves the back yard but since he is a digger, I go out with him. This morning he was able to dig under the fence within a minute or two and he was gone. Since the first thing I did was buy a tag with his name and phone number, someone called within ten minutes. Darn dog has stolen my heart although I’ve only had him for 8 days.

    I have a lot of unused stone from a pond I removed and a lot of unused flagstone that I’m going to line the area with. Do you think this will help? Although, it’s his own fault that he has to go out on leash, I kinda feel bad cuz he loves chasing the squirrels.

  63. 63.

    Mike in NC

    October 22, 2013 at 2:53 pm

    @Trollhattan:

    How long unitl not-a-Marine Wayne LaPierre issues “must arm 8th graders to protect 8th graders from 8th graders” statement?

    NRA solution to schoolyard bullying, right?

  64. 64.

    mike with a mic

    October 22, 2013 at 2:56 pm

    @The Pale Scot:

    They could build robots to do it, equip them with top grade imagery they already use for maps, use smart devices on themselves to summon help. A lot of the freaky sci-fi tech to do this was once the realm of movies and video games, a ton of that stuff is either here right now or in development. The next few decades are going to be interesting.

  65. 65.

    Kristine

    October 22, 2013 at 2:59 pm

    Anyone in the Philly/surrounding area who is up to taking in a kitten. He’s 2-3 months old, and was rendered homeless after the couple who had adopted him threw him out onto the street after 4 days because they decided they didn’t want him after all.

    Angie is hoping you can help this little guy find a safe ad loving home….. “This sweet baby needs a home ASAP. He was thrown outside by a Cruel couple bcz they changed their minds about wanting a cat after 4 days of having him. I am beyond livid at how heartless these pos ppl are. He’s never been outside and they threw him out in the cold to fend for himself like it was nothing. Looks like he’s about 2-3 months old. A complete sweetheart and pur monster. I couldn’t pick him up today but will go get him tomorrow after work but I cannot foster him. Located in Philadelphia and I could drive him to surrounding areas. Plz share this baby and help me find him a furever home where he’ll get the love and care he deserves. His life just began and already he was a victim of cruelty and plain ignorance. Plz contact me directly on my cell as this is an urgent matter. Thank u Angie 267-616-4051” Please contact Angie with any questions you may have or if you would like to adopt this little one.

    FB link here, with photos: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=605794932792789&set=a.359696020736016.77411.359291954109756&type=1&theater

  66. 66.

    Yatsuno

    October 22, 2013 at 3:00 pm

    @MikeJ: Timmeh iz tired of the State Supreme Court striking down his initiatives because he can’t just seem to do them legally. So he’s trying to get the law changed so he can pass whatever the hell he wants since he seems to have this zombie army that will vote for them no matter what. I’m just waiting for him to get indicted for something involving this, he got close when some of his funding sources were sketchy.

  67. 67.

    mike with a mic

    October 22, 2013 at 3:00 pm

    @ranchandsyrup:

    I’d predict they go the Deus-Ex option. Robots, drones, nano drones, constant monitoring through their systems that we all have to use. Plus once they create the top end augmentations that turn people into super humans that live damn near forever they will offer those to people who will become their private security.

    I think renewable energy and their ability to get off the power grid and have private power sources is really the last barrier at this point. More than a few tech companies have said once they get there, they really don’t need the state at all. The tech for lethal security hardware is pretty much already there. Just need renewable energy and the 99% and the state are utterly obsolete.

    EDIT- I also expect that once renewables are good enough we’ll see corporate structures go that way and get out of taxes for the basic grid. We’ll also see a two tiered power grid once that hits. This is already being talked about by tech companies. Rather funny when you think about it that green energy is the key thing for real corporate autonomy from the state and the community.

  68. 68.

    Roger Moore

    October 22, 2013 at 3:03 pm

    @kindness:

    I prefer mutts

    I like big mutts, and I cannot lie!

  69. 69.

    Jebediah, RBG

    October 22, 2013 at 3:04 pm

    This dog drool video looks familiar… where did I see it …
    https://balloon-juice.com/2013/10/22/back-in-the-saddle/#comment-4677788

    Maybe the thread was already dead.

  70. 70.

    Trollhattan

    October 22, 2013 at 3:05 pm

    @mike with a mic:

    Well, they’d best add to their Amazon shopping cart the Biggest Fucking Desal Plant the World Has Evah Seen, because they’ll void their water contracts if they go galt. Perhaps they can bathe in peasant piss.

  71. 71.

    muddy

    October 22, 2013 at 3:06 pm

    @JPL: My younger dog, Gracie, is part terrier. I did not realize when I adopted her. I have only ever had big dogs, fairly easy-going. Gracie’s a nut. And an escape artist, both under and over the fence. For the under, I got 2′ wide chicken wire and folded it, wired the vertical portion to the fence and put long staples holding the horizontal portion to the ground. I had to make the fences 2′ higher as well.

    I just came back from recapturing her, and have to go find the latest exit. It is apparently her job to identify weaknesses in our perimeter.

  72. 72.

    Jebediah, RBG

    October 22, 2013 at 3:07 pm

    @Amir Khalid:

    Just out of curiosity, how much clearance do you need to give a dog to be out of range?

    With my dearly departed Otto, minimum of ten feet.

  73. 73.

    Steeplejack

    October 22, 2013 at 3:10 pm

    @PhoenixRising:

    The vet says our small dog [. . .] has another 2-3 rescue Danes in him.

    My brother’s Italian greyhound, Dick Cheney (not his real name), has buried two full-sized greyhounds—and a shar-pei—and at age 13 or 14 is starting to resemble his namesake more and more. No heart transplants, though.

  74. 74.

    RosiesDad

    October 22, 2013 at 3:15 pm

    Veterinarian here who treats some mastiffs. I prefer Bull Mastiffs to English Mastiffs because they are a little smaller. (125# as opposed to 180#) I have a couple of Cane Corso patients who are really nice dogs and one who is untrustworthy and fear aggressive. The newest among our patients is a South African Boerboel and he is growing up to be a really nice dog. Only about 10 months old now and about 130# but gentle and good natured for the most part even if he has no appreciation of his own mass.

  75. 75.

    raven

    October 22, 2013 at 3:17 pm

    @JPL: You need to get treated 2 or 4×4’s, dig a trench right in the base of the fence and use big galvanized staples to nail the fencing to the lumber and cover it us.

  76. 76.

    muddy

    October 22, 2013 at 3:17 pm

    My older dog, Sawyer, is a mastiff mix. He looks like a miniature English Mastiff, he is about 80#. Despite impressive jowls, he doesn’t fling it about. I do have a fairly sizable rug for the water bowl, it drains as he walks off. And if he is interested in my food, he can get drool strings 8″ long hanging at the corners. As he averts his head and pretends like he’s not watching. No begging allowed here, not even with eyes.

    He used to be a getaway artist, but now at 3 acts all shocked and dismayed about Gracie being a naughty puppy. As though he can’t even imagine a dog doing such things. A lot of the fencing improvements were due to him 2 years ago. Altho he was never one to go over the top as she does. He’s too front heavy.

    ETA: here they are: http://www.flickr.com/photos/mudpix/

  77. 77.

    FRANCH

    October 22, 2013 at 3:17 pm

    Big dogs are terrific. I have had Labs, Danes, a giant Plott Hound, and several Rottweilers in the mix over the years. Never had a Mastiff but I have always wanted one.

    I can’t relate to a little dog at all. Too loud, too neurotic, too demanding. Sorry doggie, but if you spend an hour barking at me and then piddle on my floor when I bark back…well, you’re someone’s dog, but not mine.

  78. 78.

    The Pale Scot

    October 22, 2013 at 3:18 pm

    @mike with a mic: That’s been promoted as the future since the 80’s, until it comes up against a determined marine with K-bar/plan.

    Millennium Challenge 2002

    Red, commanded by retired Marine Corps Lieutenant General Paul K. Van Riper, adopted an asymmetric strategy, in particular, using old methods to evade Blue’s sophisticated electronic surveillance network. Van Riper used motorcycle messengers to transmit orders to front-line troops and World War II light signals to launch airplanes without radio communications.

    Red received an ultimatum from Blue, essentially a surrender document, demanding a response within 24 hours. Thus warned of Blue’s approach, Red used a fleet of small boats to determine the position of Blue’s fleet by the second day of the exercise. In a preemptive strike, Red launched a massive salvo of cruise missiles that overwhelmed the Blue forces’ electronic sensors and destroyed sixteen warships. This included one aircraft carrier, ten cruisers and five of six amphibious ships. An equivalent success in a real conflict would have resulted in the deaths of over 20,000 service personnel. Soon after the cruise missile offensive, another significant portion of Blue’s navy was “sunk” by an armada of small Red boats, which carried out both conventional and suicide attacks that capitalized on Blue’s inability to detect them as well as expected

    Using tech to take over a government is one thing, using it to live outside of society is another. Hell, just slap tariffs on anything they want to to sell.

  79. 79.

    ranchandsyrup

    October 22, 2013 at 3:23 pm

    @Trollhattan: Was just thinking the same thing, but if they have enough power, they can desal.

    @mike with a mic: I’m picking up what you’re laying down. I’m still betting that they’ll still need the great unwashed market if they have any sort of currency based setup.

  80. 80.

    Yatsuno

    October 22, 2013 at 3:23 pm

    @mike with a mic: That’s adorbs. These idiots don’t need the state until they need their property protected from those other companies infringing upon their precious intellectual property. Then they’re screaming for the courts to stand up for them.

  81. 81.

    JPL

    October 22, 2013 at 3:26 pm

    @raven: I have a lot of unused landscape timbers so I was going to do that across the back anyway.

    @muddy: I had unused chicken wire fixed that area along the fence.

    The chain link portion of the fence is 5 feet high so he can’t get over and one side is 8 ft. cedar. If he digs under the cedar, he will find the rest of the chain link fence. The previous owner put up a cedar fence in order to deter the neighbors dogs from barking.

    thanks everyone we just delivered a card and candy to the person who found him.

  82. 82.

    Roger Moore

    October 22, 2013 at 3:29 pm

    @Belafon:

    Snow Crash is not a documentary.

    Has anyone mentioned this to m_c?

  83. 83.

    JPL

    October 22, 2013 at 3:30 pm

    Today I was taking care of my brother’s dog who is a mix between a lab and shepherd but bigger. While I was searching the perimeter of the property of Mr. Finch, the big dog kept trying to show me where he got out. I finally listened and he showed me the hole.

  84. 84.

    mike with a mic

    October 22, 2013 at 3:30 pm

    @Yatsuno:

    They’ll have their own drones and security robots soon enough.

  85. 85.

    Roger Moore

    October 22, 2013 at 3:37 pm

    @Yatsuno:

    These idiots don’t need the state until they need their property protected from those other companies infringing upon their precious intellectual property.

    Or they want to hire well educated employees. Or take advantage of government funded R&D, like just about everything having to do with computers. Or drive to work. Etc.

  86. 86.

    Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism

    October 22, 2013 at 3:37 pm

    No campaigning allowed

  87. 87.

    dedc79

    October 22, 2013 at 3:37 pm

    McCauliffe up 17 on Cucinelli?! And from Rasmussen, no less.

  88. 88.

    JPL

    October 22, 2013 at 3:39 pm

    @dedc79: That certainly good news

  89. 89.

    Gin & Tonic

    October 22, 2013 at 3:43 pm

    @The Pale Scot: That whole MC02 exercise was fascinating, in a perverse way. Van Riper (a USMC General), playing the enemy, kicked the “US” side’s ass by using a variety on unconventional tactics. It was so bad an ass-kicking that they had to re-start the exercise, re-float the “sunk” ships, reset the lives of the combatants and tie one hand behind Van Riper’s back so that he wouldn’t kick their ass again. He got so frustrated at the restrictions placed on him that he resigned halfway through. http://www.theguardian.com/world/2002/aug/21/usa.julianborger

  90. 90.

    Rob in CT

    October 22, 2013 at 3:45 pm

    I have a pair of labs. Originally, labs were created by playing around with Newfoundlands. Newfies have serious jowls. I think the Newfie bred true in my older lab. His drooling ability is incredible. He can, and frequently does, blow bubbles with his drool.

  91. 91.

    The Red Pen

    October 22, 2013 at 3:45 pm

    @ranchandsyrup:

    They seem to think that people like computers and tech so that will whitewash the ugliness of objectivism/glibertarianism.

    I was reading the Wikipedia contributor profile for John Robinson. He sounds like a pretty cool tech guy, but he’s Jim Robinson’s son, and the main technical contributor to the upkeep of the Free Republic web site.

    So, he’s probably actually a complete dick, despite his fondness for the gentoo distro and hip bands.

    There’s too much of that in this biz…

  92. 92.

    Trollhattan

    October 22, 2013 at 3:48 pm

    @ranchandsyrup:

    GMTA. And for power, lots and lots of power, all they have to do is rig up the exercycles at the Google gym to generators. It’s going to be a fun future!

  93. 93.

    ranchandsyrup

    October 22, 2013 at 3:49 pm

    @The Red Pen: Agreed.
    Man you are a glutton for Freep punishment. And I thank you for your efforts. Used to catch your stuff at GOS but don’t go there any more…..

  94. 94.

    Raven

    October 22, 2013 at 3:49 pm

    Mavericks is out and it’s free! 5gb download.

  95. 95.

    Liberty60

    October 22, 2013 at 3:50 pm

    OT, and definitely not everyone’s cuppa, but I had to chuckle at the freakout over Alan Grayson’s comparing the Tea Party to the KKK.

    Sure, over the top Godwinising, but I think bomb-throwers are an asset on our side.

  96. 96.

    ranchandsyrup

    October 22, 2013 at 3:50 pm

    Our tech glibertarian betters, hanging out with Kanye and Kim K at the proposal. Jeebus. http://valleywag.gawker.com/nerd-a-list-turns-out-for-kanye-and-kims-engagement-1450196460/@maxread

  97. 97.

    ranchandsyrup

    October 22, 2013 at 3:54 pm

    @Trollhattan: LOL. If they could only harness the power of their own self-satisfaction, it would power an infinite number of worlds.

  98. 98.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    October 22, 2013 at 3:58 pm

    I can attest to the projectile drool. Cueball used to come in from running round the garden with Judy and shake his head and it would fly everywhere. There wasn’t a place in the house that did not have Cueball drool on it at some point. When Norman was painting the living room he said he was finding it all over our cathedral ceilings.

    @JPL: Dweebe our dear departed Chow/Shepard cross was a digger. We did the chicken wire trick along the entire chain link fence and she would just dig further and further back from the fence until she found the end of the chicken wire. At one point she had a tunnel that was five feet long and four feet deep (she encountered a big tree root in the middle). If I’d have had my wits about me I could have rented it out for the set of a Colditz remake. The good thing was that after all that effort she would run across the street and sit in the neighbor’s driveway to watch the house. In Dweebe’s mind she could protect the homestead unless she was across the street look at the homestead. Luckily we had a really cool Animal Control guy who, if he got called out, would walk her back across the street and pick her up and put her over the fence.

  99. 99.

    The Pale Scot

    October 22, 2013 at 4:02 pm

    What was fascinating to me was watching my ex-Marine Fox watching father dismiss Van Riper’s achievement and retired Marine general Anthony Zinni opinions about invading Iraq 2002 “of course they have a plan for after the invasion”.

    God I hate Krauthammer and Krystal.

    And I can’t find the name of the army colonel whose plan to invade Iraq with just two armored divisions driving straight to Bagdad and ignoring the flanks was promoted by Rumsfeld until the chiefs basically said fuck you.

    Crazy Times. Still.

  100. 100.

    Betty Cracker

    October 22, 2013 at 4:04 pm

    @Jebediah, RBG: I’m pretty scrupulous about crediting links from commenters, so please don’t feel slighted. I didn’t see yours and stumbled across the vid all by myself.

  101. 101.

    Redshift

    October 22, 2013 at 4:05 pm

    @mike with a mic:

    They’ll have their own drones and security robots soon enough.

    So? They can buy guns and hire mercenaries now. Do you know why they don’t? Because despite their endless whining about taxes and regulation, it’s cheaper to have government do most of things it does for all of us collectively than for every company to try to do it for themselves. If any idiot actually “seceded” and had his company pay for all of those things, the free market would ensure that he’d be out of business inside of a year.

    And that’s not even getting into the delusion that their brilliance would be making so much more money if not for regulations, because FREEDUMB!

  102. 102.

    Lurker

    October 22, 2013 at 4:08 pm

    Megan McAddledBrain is at it again:

    http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2013-10-21/is-obamacare-in-a-death-spiral-.html

  103. 103.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    October 22, 2013 at 4:10 pm

    The Washington Post:

    Washington’s crisis manager
    Paul Farhi
    Lanny Davis has steered Bill Clinton, Dan Snyder and even himself through stormy media waters.

    Bezos, you got your work cut out for you.

  104. 104.

    mike with a mic

    October 22, 2013 at 4:21 pm

    @Redshift:

    I’m not saying it’s the best idea, just that these ideas have been flying around for a while. 3d printing and renewable resources are the main new technologies that will make it “possible” as they see it.

    I already see renewable energy as what’s going to put us on a two tier energy system, with corporations having their own and everyone else remotely stuck with the grid (read anybody not the 1%) getting screwed. I can also see upgrades like google glass, genetically engineered kids, printing organs for the rich, to help move the 1% further from the rest of us.

    Will they be able to completely unplug during my life, possibly, but the tech to further divide the rich and corporations from the rest of us just keeps coming and coming at a huge pass. The tech geek in me wants to scream “fuck yeah this amazing, I never thought I’d live to see stuff like this”, the realist in me wants to scream “and this is how the distopia really starts and it’s going to suck”.

  105. 105.

    The Red Pen

    October 22, 2013 at 4:27 pm

    @ranchandsyrup:

    Used to catch your stuff at GOS but don’t go there any more…..

    Me neither… and several other BJ commenters that I’ve seen.

  106. 106.

    WereBear

    October 22, 2013 at 4:35 pm

    Anyone here friends with a mastiff?

    Oh, yes.

    You have to remember how far back the lines go. These are the Roman war dogs. Who would fight to the death for those they loved. Who had jowls because they would open those mouths so wide to grab their person out of the thick of battle, to safety, no matter what. Because they would kill anyone who got in their way.

    It is a privilege to be loved by a mastiff. Drool and all.

  107. 107.

    Riley's Enabler

    October 22, 2013 at 4:45 pm

    @PaulW: Eating some is a good sign, lethargy is not. Take her in, it could be a lot of things – some simple, some not.

    Kitten Update (no pics yet, but soon – I hope). Took home 2 feral kittens of about 6 weeks on Saturday. Saw the vet yesterday – black kitten (Shadow) is awesome, fat and sassy – full of beans. Cream/point (Casper) is not doing well, and had to go in today for fluids and hourly hand-feeding. Bless my wonderful vet for this…I’ll pick him up (Casper, not the vet!) after work and hand feed tonight, he will return to vet tomorrow for more of the same. Hoping this tiny guy grabs a break and decides to thrive. Good news – no Feline Leukemia or AIDS. I promise photos as soon as I have them both home and feeling better.

    Riley – the 40-pound mutt – is bemused but very careful in her interactions with Shadow. So far, so good!

  108. 108.

    Jebediah, RBG

    October 22, 2013 at 4:45 pm

    @Betty Cracker:
    Oh, no problem, of course. It’s not like I saw it in some obscure corner of the web that only I know about…I understand that this “Salon” website might have traffic approaching Balloon Juice’s.

  109. 109.

    Gian

    October 22, 2013 at 5:04 pm

    speaking of dogs. watch where the treats come from:

    Nearly 600 pets have died and more than 3,600 have been sickened in an ongoing, mysterious outbreak of illnesses tied to jerky treats made in China, federal animal health officials said Tuesday.

    Most of the cases have been in dogs of all breeds, ages and sizes — although 10 cats have been sickened, too — after eating chicken, duck and sweet potato jerky treats. The pace of the reported illnesses appears to have slowed, but federal Food and Drug Administration officials are now seeking extra help from veterinarians and pet owners in solving the ongoing puzzle.

    http://www.nbcnews.com/health/pet-jerky-treat-mystery-nearly-600-animals-dead-still-no-8C11436330

  110. 110.

    JPL

    October 22, 2013 at 5:08 pm

    @Litlebritdifrnt: That is so funny. Finch knows he lovable so would just wait on someone’s stoop until they found him. He was dropped at the humane society after a divorce and loves life. Except for the heart worm treatment the humane society gave him, he seems socialized so the couple did something right.

  111. 111.

    Anne Laurie

    October 22, 2013 at 5:41 pm

    Betty, one last thing your husband might want to check: If your homeowners insurance company has “dangerous dogs” riders, then all the mastiff breeds might be on the do-not-cover list. HOAs too also, although I don’t think you have to worry about one of those. (Yes, 99.9% of all the mastiff breeds are lazy luvebugs who wouldn’t threaten a human even under duress, but the rare outliers can and have KILLED humans, and that’s what the adjusters remember.)

    Me, if I were living with someone who just wanted a “mastiffy” dog, I’d introduce him to some uncropped Great Danes. With their natural ears, they look just like the mastiffs in the medieval tapestries, and every one I’ve ever met has been a wonderful wonderful gentle darling. You still have the short-livespan issue, but careful feeding and exercise help with that (and unlike mastiffs, Danes are good running buddies, that’s the greyhound part of their geneset).

  112. 112.

    Elizabelle

    October 22, 2013 at 5:58 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    Saw that headline at WaPost (re Lanny Davis, crisis manager).

    You could not pay me to click on it.

  113. 113.

    raven

    October 22, 2013 at 6:03 pm

    I just got an email from our dentist letting us know that their office manager died from cancer yesterday. She was a beautiful woman who had a deep love for animals. I wrote back and told the doc that she was a person that could make a person want to go to the dentist. She was brave till the end and we’ll miss her.

  114. 114.

    ranchandsyrup

    October 22, 2013 at 6:12 pm

    @raven: Sorry to hear that, raven.

  115. 115.

    A Humble Lurker

    October 22, 2013 at 6:21 pm

    @Trollhattan:
    I don’t see why they don’t do that. Just take the hamsters on wheels gag and make it real. Pay people to go to the gym and ride a stationary cycle or some shit for a while, thus adding power and cutting down on the nation’s obesity problem while stimulating the economy at the same time. It’s win all around.

  116. 116.

    NotMax

    October 22, 2013 at 6:46 pm

    Friend of mine had a mastiff, and any dog toys were quickly destroyed.

    The solution was bring the dog a coconut, which he loved playing with and was durable enough to survive.

  117. 117.

    steverino

    October 22, 2013 at 10:17 pm

    @A Humble Lurker:
    Re: harnessing gym workouts; I thought I saw this recently: The Straight Dope

  118. 118.

    Howard Appel

    October 23, 2013 at 12:25 am

    Mastiffs (and by that I mean English Mastiffs – they being the only true Mastiffs) RULE — and DROOL, SNORE AND FART. Having said that, as the proud owner of Bruin, who only weighed 225 lbs, I can say that they are the sweetest, gentlest and most loving companions you will ever find. I got Bruin as a rescue when he was 14 months old (along with Berkeley, a Great Dane who was 12 months old) and got them both professional obedience training. All Bruin ever wanted was more loving (and to sneak up onto my bed and put his head under the pillows when there was thunder and lightning). I lost both of them several years ago and miss them terribly.

  119. 119.

    Paul in KY

    October 23, 2013 at 8:37 am

    @The Pale Scot: Did your father come around to reality (at least in Iraq)?

  120. 120.

    Paul in KY

    October 23, 2013 at 8:40 am

    @Howard Appel: Sounded like great dogs. Would have liked to have met them.

  121. 121.

    John

    October 23, 2013 at 12:14 pm

    I have an Italian Mastiff (Cane Corso).

    She’s a great dog. Not the sharpest tool in the shed, but she was nevertheless extremely easy to train because she is VERY eager to please. In contrast, my Ridgeback is a pain in the ass princess, but I love her anyway. Cane Corsos drool only minimally and are very athletic compared with other mastiffs.

    The nice thing about Cane Corsos is you get all the benefits of a big dog without the short lifespan–they live about as long as a Golden Retriever–and they do not have many genetic problems, but you should be sure to get the dog from a breeder with a track record of producing dogs with good hips. I’d love an English Mastiff, but sadly the short lifespan and health problems make that a nonstarter. Same with Dogues de Bordeaux, which are actually the shortest-lived dogs.

    If you look at pictures of Cane Corsos online, they look somewhat intimidating. Try to get one without cropped ears, they are less scary looking that way.

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