Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in morse code.

I desperately hope that, yet again, i am wrong.

Stamping your little feets and demanding that they see how important you are? Not working anymore.

“When somebody takes the time to draw up a playbook, they’re gonna use it.”

When you’re in more danger from the IDF than from Russian shelling, that’s really bad.

When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.

Hot air and ill-informed banter

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires Republicans to act in good faith.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

Since we are repeating ourselves, let me just say fuck that.

We cannot abandon the truth and remain a free nation.

Somebody needs to explain to DeSantis that nobody needs to do anything to make him look bad.

People really shouldn’t expect the government to help after they watched the GOP drown it in a bathtub.

How stupid are these people?

Today’s gop: why go just far enough when too far is right there?

Wow, you are pre-disappointed. How surprising.

There is no right way to do the wrong thing.

He really is that stupid.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

Don’t expect peaches from an apple tree.

“Loving your country does not mean lying about it’s history.”

You don’t get to peddle hatred on saturday and offer condolences on sunday.

This year has been the longest three days of putin’s life.

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93Comments

  1. 1.

    Villago Delenda Est

    Obviously, they’re inspecting for improperly replaced divots.

    Yes, I know that’s a green. But this is Australia we’re talking about.

  2. 2.

    Alex

    World Cup Draw!

    GROUP A — Brazil, Croatia, Mexico, Cameroon
    GROUP B — Spain, Netherlands, Chile, Australia
    GROUP C — Colombia, Greece, Ivory Coast, Japan
    GROUP D — Uruguay, Costa Rica, England, Italy
    GROUP E — Switzerland, Ecuador, France, Honduras
    GROUP F — Argentina, Bosnia-Herzegovina, Iran, Nigeria
    GROUP G — Germany, Portugal, Ghana, United States
    GROUP H — Belgium, Algeria, Russia, South Korea

    Them kangaroos are dead.

    And the big question — deathiest of the groups between Group B, Group D, or Group G.

  3. 3.

    ruemara

    Trying to decide if 6 years of producing a live government program counts as reality tv. It’s as real as it gets, no filters, straight in and straight out to the masses. With one finger on the police line if things get out of hand. But as of yet, no one has gotten into a hair pulling fight while ripping each other’s dresses off, no matter how often I’ve encouraged the electeds and lobbyists.

  7. 7.

    burnspbesq

    Portugal: Ronaldo and … who?
    Ghana can be wildly inconsistent.
    It’s not like we’re unfamiliar with Germany.

    Tough but do-able.

  9. 9.

    Betty Cracker

    @ruemara:

    But as of yet, no one has gotten into a hair pulling fight while ripping each other’s dresses off, no matter how often I’ve encouraged the electeds and lobbyists.

    Jeeh-ree!
    Jeeh-ree!
    Jeeh-ree!

  11. 11.

    MikeJ

    @ruemara: “The true story of seven strangers, picked to work in a city council, work together and have their lives taped, to find out what happens when people stop campaigning… and start legislating.”

  12. 12.

    cckids

    @MattF: Jesus.

    I was up at 3 a.m. to take care of my son, and Morning Joe was on. Some dim bulb actually said that Mandela was “standing astride history yelling “STOP”, just like Wm F. Buckley”.

    No idea who said it, I just blearily turned it off. The total moronity of it just . . . wears me out.

  16. 16.

    StringOnAStick

    I knew a true winger once who made a big deal about how he was going to Australia soon, and considered it a sacred duty to go ‘roo hunting, and to kill as many as possible. Yes, some consider them pests and they are a bit like our out of control deer population, but this had more to do with making sure everyone within earshot knew just how big of an NRA supporter he was and that he lived in AZ strictly because of the ‘gun rights’ he enjoyed there. He was a complete and total loon.

  19. 19.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @cckids:

    Some dim bulb actually said that Mandela was “standing astride history yelling “STOP”, just like Wm F. Buckley”.

    Mandela was a left-wing revolutionary. How he could be a Buckleyian conservative is a bit beyond my understanding.

  20. 20.

    Mnemosyne

    @ruemara:

    Here’s the thing about reality TV: it is scripted. Period. All of it. It doesn’t always look like it is, because normal people are not great at improvising, but all of those shows have a script that they follow where the “actors” are supposed to get from Point A to Point B in the scene.

    Which is kind of like a meeting agenda, if you get my drift.

  22. 22.

    Keith P

    Oh, nice, the Texans finally – FINALLY – fired Gary Kubiak. I’ve been hearing about that jerkoff since I was in jr. high (he went to the high school that most of my classmates went to). Glad to finally be rid of him and his outdated “playmenu”.

  23. 23.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @Mnemosyne:

    Reality TV is scripted just like normal comedies or dramas, but the on air talent is paid substantially less.

    Which means more money in the pockets of the producers, who are, in reality, parasites.

  24. 24.

    feebog

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    Obviously, they’re inspecting for improperly replaced divots.

    Yes, I know that’s a green. But this is Australia we’re talking about.

    No, that is not a green, but a well mowed fairway. Reminds me though of the great Lion’s Tackle Alex Karras, who sponsored a charity golf tournament every year. He usually had a few wild animals let loose like a zebra or several antelope just to make things interesting. Also the old disappearing ball trick on one hole, putt it in the hole and you ball goes down a six foot hole. Good times.

  26. 26.

    ruemara

    @Mnemosyne: ahh, I see where you’re going. I know it’s scripted, but I had not seen the parallels. Hmm. I think I can reword a few descriptions here and there.

    @Villago Delenda Est: Hey! May I one day be a more symbiotic parasite.

  27. 27.

    burnspbesq

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    Man, group D looks like a pit of wolves ripping each other to shreds.

    The bad puns write themselves. E,g., “Hannibal Suarez will feast on the England defense.”

    I actually think Group B is the toughest. Poor Australia.

  28. 28.

    Mnemosyne

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    Which means more money in the pockets of the producers, who are, in reality, parasites.

    Money in the pockets of the executive producers. All those people listed as “producers” at the end of the show? Those are the writers, and they are not covered by the Writer’s Guild contract, which means the executive producers can pay them below union minimums … and they do.

    That’s one of the reasons networks love reality shows: none of the talent (on-screen or off) is union, so they can slash their salaries.

  29. 29.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @Mnemosyne: Here’s the thing about reality TV: it is scripted. Period. All of it.
    That moment when Papa Duggar was trying to stammer out an endorsement for Ken Cuccinelli and couldn’t pronounce (among other things) the candidate’s name, and kept saying “Oh, let’s try that again” was a window into “reality TV”

  30. 30.

    Mnemosyne

    @ruemara:

    Slight clarification so as not to scare you off too much: I think most of the technicians (camera, sound, editing, etc.) are covered by union rules and get union pay. As usual, it’s the writers and actors who get screwed in reality TV.

  31. 31.

    Amir Khalid

    Once, at an IBM facility somewhere in upstate New York, I looked out the window and saw a flock of large birds (peafowl, if memory serves). The lady showing us journos from Asia around the place explained that the birds were a nuisance: sometimes they’d come onto the golf course on the company grounds and make off with a golf ball or two.

    I’m glad I decided not to tell her I felt the same way about golf.

  33. 33.

    SFAW

    @MattF:

    And, by-the-way, a collection of kangaroos is referred to as a ‘mob’ of kangaroos.

    Head roo and noted tough guy, “Crazy Joey,” was heard to say “Nice golf course you got here, mate. Be a shame if anything happened to it … ”

    Meanwhile, his consigliere – also named Joey, interestingly enough – was heard to tell the soldiers “Just jump! You don’t have to say Boing Boing Boing!”

  35. 35.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @ruemara:

    You’re probably already one. I think Mnemosyne drew the distinctions much more starkly, and accurately, than I did in my haste to be outraged.

  36. 36.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @SFAW:

    OK, you just caused me to startle the cat. Good thing I finished off my coffee a few minutes back, or a keyboard soaking would have taken place.

  37. 37.

    SFAW

    @Amir Khalid:

    I’m glad I decided not to tell her I felt the same way about golf.

    Wait, I’m not sure I understand – are you saying that golf makes off with your balls?

  38. 38.

    Amir Khalid

    @burnspbesq:
    The best thing about following England’s progress through any football tournament is the ritual wailing and rending of garments after they get knocked out, whenever that is. No stiff upper lip there; the Inggeris show you how experts do maudlin self-pity.

  42. 42.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @SFAW:

    Oh, it was a one-two combo thing.

    The Gary Larson theft, though, was just more of his brilliance. Also, the word “boing” is in and of itself giggle inducing.

  43. 43.

    handsmile

    @burnspbesq:

    Defense: Pepe, Coentrao, Alves, Pererira/R. Costa
    Midfield: Nani, Moutinho, Veloso/Meireles
    Forward: CR7, Almeida, Postiga/Varela

    Other than keeper, the USNMT doesn’t match up man-to-man or have the depth/experience of the Portuguese squad. And just to be clear, I loathe Portugal. Filthy players.

    “Do-able”? Perhaps, with injuries.

    Agree that Groups B and D are the “deathiest” (h/t Alex). And the football gods have certainly smiled benignly on Argentina, Belgium, and France.

  45. 45.

    SFAW

    @Amir Khalid:

    I meant I felt the same way the birds did.

    Oh, so now it’s you that wants to make off with the golfers’ balls? I didn’t realize you were into that kinky shit.

    For someone I’ve always respected, you’re startin’ to lose me, bucko.

  48. 48.

    SFAW

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    Yeah, the “Boing” cartoon is one of my favorites. Right up there with the pilot saying “What’s a mountain goat doing way up here in a cloud bank?”

    And “God’s gift to warthogs.”

    and
    and
    and

    Just too many great ones from him.

  51. 51.

    SFAW

    @Amir Khalid:

    It’s OK, Amir, I still love you. In a manly-man kind of way, of course.

    But I have an embarrassing (for me) question, because I’m old and have CRS Syndrome: do you live in the States? Or over where Vizzini warned us not to get in a land war? (For a long time, I thought you were here, but I thought I read that you’re in Malaysia? Really sorry for the stupid question.)

  54. 54.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @Alex:

    ESPN headline: Jurgen Klinsmann: ‘It’s a difficult group’

    Ah, the famous German understatement.

    Still, positive vibes from him.

  55. 55.

    ruemara

    @Mnemosyne: Oh, I know. I read up things. But at this point, even non-union pay (which is all I’d be eligible for) is better than the no-pay thing. Better by degrees is still better.

  56. 56.

    Amir Khalid

    @SFAW:
    I wuv you too. I am indeed Malaysian. As I often mention, I live in Kuala Lumpur, quite near the Petronas Towers.

  58. 58.

    Mnemosyne

    @ruemara:

    Oh, yeah, money’s money when you don’t have any! But it’s probably good to be aware of the WGA actions in case you (a) get the job and (b) have an opportunity to vote for a union.

  60. 60.

    SFAW

    @Amir Khalid:

    As I often mention,

    And as I (apparently) often miss. Of course, my B-J reading has dropped significantly in the last year.

    I blame Clinton Obama.

  62. 62.

    Betty Cracker

    @Amir Khalid: I love that you used the word “peafowl.” Most people around here call all of them — males and females — “peacocks.” Sometimes I want to say, “That’s a peaHEN, dumbass!”

  63. 63.

    Pogonip

    Wasn’t Chile where the angry spectators dismembered the ref? Or was that Argentina? Wherever it is I don’t want to live there. In the video at the morgue was saying “You gotta see THIS!”. They were unsurprised, as if that sort of thing happened all season. Yikes!

  66. 66.

    kuvasz

    Love that pix, and imagine the golfer asking the caddy for a suggestion on what club to use:

    “Blimey, mate what’s in the bag for this sort of thing? ” ….”I don’t know boss, a boomerang?”

  67. 67.

    burnspbesq

    @Betty Cracker:

    St. Peter’s College’s sports teams are nicknamed the Peacocks, which creates an interesting conundrum (similar to the one faced by South Carolina) with respect to the women’s teams.

    When the South Carolina women lose to Clemson, is the headline “Tigers Feast on Game Hens?”

  68. 68.

    DocSardonic

    Peafowl …. grandiosely plumed giant feathered rats with Marshall powered party noisemakers. Florida should declare an open season.

  71. 71.

    Jebediah, RBG

    @Mnemosyne:

    Depends on the show. I worked on a bunch of the dating reality shows that aired on VH1. I was in post and none of it was union.

  74. 74.

    Jebediah, RBG

    @Mnemosyne:
    Wasn’t “Biggest Loser” airing on NBC? It was produced by 3 Ball, not directly by NBC, and the crew walked out in 2010 in an attempt to get a union contract. I recall being surprised by that, as I thought that anything airing on a network would be union-made. (I knew that cable shows were often non-union, since I had worked on some of them. I had worked non-union on something for Fox, but that wasn’t even really a pilot, just a pitch if I remember correctly.)

  76. 76.

    Paula

    @Alex:
    @Villago Delenda Est:

    We’re gonna loooooooooose …

    And it’s OK. Those are some worthy teams to lose to.

    OK, wallowing over: I say bring it on. The USMNT have emotional baggage with every one of those teams. It can be a load ti carry … or they can use it to fuel the fire.

  77. 77.

    Mnemosyne

    @Jebediah, RBG:

    Honestly, I’m not sure — I mostly keep up with the WGA news since I aspire to be a member someday. ;-) I would also be surprised to hear that they were using a non-union crew on a network show, but maybe they were able to do it because it was a production company making it, not the network.

  78. 78.

    Jebediah, RBG

    @j:

    So it doesn’t even have to be scripted, just heavily edited.

    On the crappy dating-elimination shows I worked on, there wasn’t a pre-written “script” as such, but of course the situations (challenges, competitions, etc.) were planned in advance. The script that ended up being given to the editors was written by the producers after the fact, working from transcripts of everything every cast member said that day. (In my opinion, that counts as writing and I thought they should have had WGA representation.)
    And of course through editing, any cast member’s actions or opinions can be wildly misrepresented – as the Duck Dynasty guys seem to be finding out.

  79. 79.

    Mnemosyne

    @j:

    As I understand it, the shows are essentially improvised — the producers tell the participants (aka actors) what they want them to do or talk about that day, and the cast improvs it. As I said, one of the reasons the shows are often so crappy is that they use non-actors who don’t know how to improvise, so that’s why the dialogue is so bad. (“I’m not here to make friends!”)

    But if improvisation doesn’t count as writing, then Larry David needs to give all of his awards back for “Curb Your Enthusiasm.”

  80. 80.

    Jebediah, RBG

    @Mnemosyne:
    Yeah, I think it’s the outside production company that lets that happen.
    But that might not be true for all crafts – we were being asked to support the walk out/pickets even though it wasn’t editorial that was trying to organize. Maybe MPEG has agreements with the networks that other locals/crafts don’t – meaning maybe you wouldn’t see a show on a network where the editors were non-union, but maybe the grips would be.
    As for you joining the WGA – I am sure it will happen, but I will keep my fingers crossed anyway.

  81. 81.

    CaseyL

    @DocSardonic: A friend told me there are feral peafowl in her area of Miami. They don’t hang out at her place too often, but every once in a while she’ll go outside and see one standing on her roof.

    Me, I think it would be a hoot to have peafowl running around all over the place. They’re noisy?… sure, and the city would be so quiet and peaceful, if it weren’t for the birds. Uh huh.

    Any bird – any animal, really – that lives and thrives in cities without being owned is considered a nuisance, vicious, a disease carrier, or all of the above. Some might actually be… but I think that attitude says more about how we regard our cities, that we think the animals who live wild in them are somehow contaminated.

    Here in Seattle the various municipalities mounted a successful Death to Canada Geese campaign over the last few years: destroying eggs and nests, gassing entire families of geese. Because they pooped all over the sidewalks, you see; and in parks. Can’t have that!

  82. 82.

    Jebediah, RBG

    @CaseyL:

    Me, I think it would be a hoot to have peafowl running around all over the place. They’re noisy?… sure, and the city would be so quiet and peaceful, if it weren’t for the birds. Uh huh.

    Down in Palos Verdes the residents are very split on that. Some love the peafowl and other want to kill them all – because they eat, poop, and make noise. (I am not sure how any living critter is supposed to avoid doing those things.)

  84. 84.

    Betty Cracker

    @CaseyL: We used to live near a guy who had peafowl on his property (he had a few acres). He was across a river from us, but you could hear them very clearly. I liked the sound.

    The noisiest birds hereabouts are Sandhill cranes. Loud as hell! But again, I like their racket. It sounds like nature to me, and you don’t generally hear birds sounding off in the middle of the night since they’re roosting then, so it’s not like they wake you up (unless you work night shift). I’m appalled that Seattle got rid of their Canada geese.

  85. 85.

    cckids

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Mandela was a left-wing revolutionary. How he could be a Buckleyian conservative is a bit beyond my understanding.

    Yeah, mine too. Plus, the left-right part aside, to say that Mandela was saying “stop!” to change in S. Africa is to state that he was fighting for the status quo.

    Which shows a total lack of comprehension of reality.

  86. 86.

    CaseyL

    @Betty Cracker:

    I’m appalled that Seattle got rid of their Canada geese.

    It broke my heart.

    There were families that I’d see at Greenlake every time I went for a walk there, so I could watch them growing up: Mom and Dad and chicks walking in a very stately manner along the path by the lake. Suddenly they were gone. Flocks flying by overhead, in their V Formation and honking gloriously, would be a regular thing… and then, they weren’t.

    Seattle didn’t kill them all off; left a few, and the numbers are slowly increasing again. But the geese were ubiquitous, and now they’re not.

  87. 87.

    ShadeTail

    @Betty Cracker: Team Seattle. Those geese are mean motherfuckers who think they own the place. They try to chase off everyone else and act like they have the right to destroy anything. Not to mention their loud noise that wakes you up at 4am and how they literally cover everything with their nasty runny shit.

  88. 88.

    maya

    @burnspbesq: It’s St. Peter’s University now. Graduated Summa Cum Loudly in ’69. They are called Peahens.The Jebees had just started admitting women in ’67. Slowly at first.

    Edit: Why isn’t a group of kangaroos referred to as a court?

  90. 90.

    PurpleGirl

    @ShadeTail: Those geese DO own the area. They were there for thousands of years before people were. They are behaving according to their nature. Killing them off does not solve the problem — they will come back and continue acting the same way. Are you going to keep calling for them to be killed off? How often will you have to do that? Will the city have to have a routine of every Y number of years killing the geese?

    My apartment complex did something with birth control to handle the pigeon problem. There are a lot less pigeon around now but there are no little sparrows (little brown birds). I miss the sparrows singing at 3 AM. I don’t know if they will ever come back, the pigeons have begun to.

  93. 93.

    terben

    The last time I saw that many kangaroos in a group was through night vision goggles on the 81mm mortar range just before the first rounds came in. LOL.

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