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You are here: Home / Open Threads / Sunday Morning Coming Down Open Thread

Sunday Morning Coming Down Open Thread

by Anne Laurie|  December 15, 20134:46 am| 64 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads, All we want is life beyond the thunderdome

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Since all of us Olds went on a nostalgia binge last night, here’s a Washington Post book review that seems relevant to our interests:

Is there a bright side to aging, besides the fact that you’re still alive to do it? According to Douwe Draaisma, a professor of the history and theory of psychology in the Netherlands, reminiscence, which ironically increases just as our faculty of memory begins to decline, is a largely unsung pleasure of advancing age. There’s other good news in “The Nostalgia Factory,” including reassurance that an inability to remember names, find the right word and even recall what you were intending to do is part of the normal aging process and is rarely an early harbinger of dementia…

So how can we fight against memory attrition? Although “The Nostalgia Factory” is not a self-help book, Draaisma offers this well-worn advice: Remain socially engaged, which has been documented to keep our minds stimulated. “Rather than working on memory skills as such, people who sign up for memory training ought to be helped to work on their faith in their memories,” he argues…

One way to stop worrying is to focus on more positive aspects of aging, including the “reminiscence effect” — the thawing of old memories long frozen in a sort of permastore. This surfacing of our oldest memories is not to be confused with nostalgia, a painful longing for a past (or home) that no longer exists.

A curious aspect of the reminiscence effect is that it “seems to contradict what might be called the First Law of Forgetting: the longer ago something happened, the less chance we have of remembering it.” In fact, Draaisma explains, studies show a “reminiscence bump” centering on memories from one’s early adult years, peaking at around age 20 — perhaps in part because those formative years include more inherently important “firsts.” With longer lifespans leading to more three- and even four-generation families than ever, evolutionary psychologists suggest that the reminiscence effect represents “a transition to a more narrative way of passing on information” and should “invite us to see aging not as deterioration or decline but as a separate phase of development with characteristics of its own.” …

**********
So I guess in a preliterate society, WhenIWasYourAge may have been a genuinely useful group advantage (assuming the whippersnappers ever listened).

Assuming you can remember what you came in here for, what’s on the agenda for the day?

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Reader Interactions

64Comments

  1. 1.

    Amir Khalid

    December 15, 2013 at 5:00 am

    Israeli Defence Forces posted on its blog a photo of the exterior of Suria KLCC, my local mall, to show that everything is just peachy in Gaza.

  2. 2.

    NotMax

    December 15, 2013 at 5:28 am

    All that time and energy spent suppressing memory, for naught.

    Guess this song is semi-obligatory.

  3. 3.

    Tommy

    December 15, 2013 at 5:39 am

    @NotMax: Great song. This is going to sound really Frued. My mom was “hot” and she was rocking all those things in that video.

  4. 4.

    JPL

    December 15, 2013 at 5:44 am

    @Amir Khalid: Wow! There are some in our country who will be showing that photo on facebook to their friends and swear that it’s true.
    From the article, The Jerusalem-based Times of Israel explains: “The pictures did indeed show a different reality to the Gaza the world has become accustomed to seeing… but there was a slight problem with one of the snaps…

    It depends on the meaning of slight problem..

  5. 5.

    raven

    December 15, 2013 at 6:17 am

    Childs Song

    Each of us must do the things that matter
    All of us must see what we can see
    It was long ago you must remember
    You were once as young and scared as me
    I don’t know how hard it is yet mamma
    When you relaize you’re growning old
    I know how hard is not to be younger
    I know you’ve tried to keep me from the cold

  6. 6.

    raven

    December 15, 2013 at 6:25 am

    I’m still trying to figure out what prompted the young man who helped me with my flat tire in the rain and then paid for it was thinking. I know I looked raggedy because I was dressed for construction work in the mud and I was in my old truck but damn! The guys in the tire store said he was just a genuinely nice guy but it was so far beyond the pale. I told the story at a dinner party last night and people were really moved and it prompted other stories of random acts of kindness that made for a fun night.

  7. 7.

    raven

    December 15, 2013 at 6:28 am

    Dec. 10, 2013 — In the first study of its kind, two researchers have used popular music to help severely brain-injured patients recall personal memories. Amee Baird and Séverine Samson outline the results and conclusions of their pioneering research in the recent issue of the journal Neuropsychological Rehabilitation.

  8. 8.

    OzarkHillbilly

    December 15, 2013 at 6:39 am

    Ummmmm…. uhhhhh…. ahhhhhhh…. sh!t. Can I get back to you on that?

  9. 9.

    OzarkHillbilly

    December 15, 2013 at 7:10 am

    So i just went on my daily “ketchup tour” of Balloon Juice and found Johns “Riddle me this Jeebus”.

    Made me think of Mr. Deity.

    “What about Down’s Syndrome?”
    “Nah, we’ll keep that.”

  10. 10.

    JPL

    December 15, 2013 at 7:27 am

    @raven: It’s such a nice story.

  11. 11.

    Linda Featheringill

    December 15, 2013 at 7:29 am

    Ah Anne. You’re still a spring chicken. Not to worry.

    Freezing rain here today. I hope we can stay inside for a while and just wait for it to get better.

    BTW, I see that my winter cabbage plants are covered with snow. Hope that’s okay.

  12. 12.

    jeffreyw

    December 15, 2013 at 7:32 am

    Kitteh

  13. 13.

    tybee

    December 15, 2013 at 7:34 am

    @raven:

    i’ve been meaning to ask, did you get the bail-less reel? and, if so, how did that work out?

  14. 14.

    Raven

    December 15, 2013 at 7:34 am

    @jeffreyw: Good lookin gato!

  15. 15.

    JPL

    December 15, 2013 at 7:37 am

    @jeffreyw: Ahh What a sweetie!

  16. 16.

    Linda Featheringill

    December 15, 2013 at 7:41 am

    @jeffreyw:

    Handsome fellow!

  17. 17.

    Professor

    December 15, 2013 at 7:43 am

    I did not know that John Bolton (the walrus) can play the guitar and sing at the same time.

  18. 18.

    Raven

    December 15, 2013 at 7:46 am

    @tybee: No, I drove all the way to Bass Pro on vets day to check it out. The reel guy basically talked me out of it saying it just wasn’t all that great. I ended up paying $30 for a big shimano that worked great with my 11ft rod. Got a 27 inch red, pompano and blue and had to throw back a big ass snapper on the boat. Wading out to my neck in the 60 degree water and 50 degree air was a challenge but fun.

  19. 19.

    Raven

    December 15, 2013 at 7:47 am

    @ProfessorHow dare you!

  20. 20.

    Raven

    December 15, 2013 at 7:47 am

    @ProfessoriPad outside

  21. 21.

    Baud

    December 15, 2013 at 7:48 am

    Draaisma offers this well-worn advice: Remain socially engaged, which has been documented to keep our minds stimulated.

    Good advice. I can personally attest to the fact that the lack of social engagement is correlated with deteriorating mental facilities.

  22. 22.

    jeffreyw

    December 15, 2013 at 7:56 am

    @Raven:
    @JPL:
    @Linda Featheringill:
    He/she is a pretty kitty. Mrs J’s shelter put on a adoption fair yesterday and placed 8 puppies and a cat, She brought home more pictures.

  23. 23.

    PurpleGirl

    December 15, 2013 at 8:04 am

    @jeffreyw: She’s a sweetie. I love pink noses.

  24. 24.

    WereBear

    December 15, 2013 at 8:14 am

    @jeffreyw: Lotsa white, lotsa sweet, in my experience :)

  25. 25.

    WereBear

    December 15, 2013 at 8:31 am

    I’m only mumblety-mumble years old myself, but I’m toying with a theory about diminishing energy.

    When we go through growth spurts in adolescence, it makes us clumsy, because we are creatures who fall back on their habits in defiance of all sense. I think a similar thing happens as we get older; the amount of energy available in young adulthood has “set a template” and we no longer provide that same level of impetus routinely.

    This might be the real reason so many fumble at daily tasks. In which case, it’s fixable.

    The real “ager” is a refusal to adapt to change. I wish I had a nickel for every person (some I’d consider “young”) who whine at me that they don’t want to use the Internet.

    Fine, but encyclopedias aren’t coming back, we aren’t printing brochures to send you like we used to because it’s too expensive, and growing up I knew people who refused to talk on that “newfangled phone thing.”

  26. 26.

    OzarkHillbilly

    December 15, 2013 at 8:40 am

    @WereBear:Yeah, well, I still refuse to learn how to use an ipod. But not because I am against them or anything. But because as soon as I figure out how make one of those damn things function, it will be obsolete!

  27. 27.

    PurpleGirl

    December 15, 2013 at 8:40 am

    @WereBear: My sister (who is 10 years older than me) retired from her job at 55; she said she wanted to spend more time with her husband who had just retired from his job (at 68). However, it is also true that she didn’t want to learn to use a computer and her office was definitely going that way. She still doesn’t use a computer or go on the internet on one of her daughters’ machines.

  28. 28.

    Boudica

    December 15, 2013 at 8:51 am

    My 70+ year old parents and in-laws all use computers. ..but my mother-in-law has a smart phone and a nook and uses them religiously. (That’s not to say that I don’t have to help her out with settings and finer points when we’re together.)

  29. 29.

    Violet

    December 15, 2013 at 8:57 am

    I don’t see any advantages to aging. Not once you get to a point where health issues start interfering with your daily life–whether its mobility, brain and memory issues, reflexes and driving or anything else. At that point it’s mostly about doing whatever it takes to keep one’s independence until it becomes obvious that’s not possible anymore.

    There’s a reason old people sit around and talk about their various ailments. In addition to that being something they all have in common–a shared experience–it’s also a comparison game. “At least I’m not as bad off as that person.”

    It is what it is. We’re all aging every day from the moment we’re born. We’re all headed the same direction. You can either accept it and enjoy the ride or not.

  30. 30.

    debbie

    December 15, 2013 at 9:00 am

    @Violet:

    Aside from the aches and pains, not being able to get a decent job is the worst of it for me. All my experience counts for nothing because these clowns think they know it all.

  31. 31.

    Phylllis

    December 15, 2013 at 9:03 am

    @WereBear: I recall a 70-something lady I knew about twenty years ago who would hang up in fury if she connected with her daughter’s answering machine. When I asked her one time why she wouldn’t just leave a message, she said “I’m not talking to a damn machine.” Wanted to ask her wtf she thought the telephone itself was.

  32. 32.

    Violet

    December 15, 2013 at 9:03 am

    OT, but interesting. Pope Francis says he knows good Marxists:

    Last month, American radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh, who has a huge following in the United States, railed against the pope for written comments made on the world economy.

    Limbaugh, who is not Catholic, said that parts of the document were “pure Marxism coming out of the mouth of the pope” and suggested that someone else had written the papal document for him. He also accused the pope of going “beyond Catholicism” and being “purely political”.

    Asked about the accusations, which sparked a debate in the media and blogosphere last month, Francis, a member of the all-male Jesuit order associated with progressive social policies, said, “Marxist ideology is wrong. But in my life I have known many Marxists who are good people, so I don’t feel offended.”

    Also too, Pope Francis is a soshulist:

    In another document last week, Francis said huge salaries and bonuses were symptoms of an economy based on greed and called again for nations to narrow the wealth gap.

  33. 33.

    jeffreyw

    December 15, 2013 at 9:03 am

    I miss talking to the operator when I pick up the phone. I remember my mother feeling sorry for those women when they came out with the newfangled rotary dialers. She said there were very few jobs a woman could get and that was one of the better ones.I still remember the hand written number under the plastic film on the center of the dial.

  34. 34.

    WereBear

    December 15, 2013 at 9:09 am

    @OzarkHillbilly: Hee hee. That’s how I feel about Facebook!

    In the 1980’s I did classes for “computer phobics,” primarily middle-aged lady bookkeepers, thanks to a co-worker who realized that was the way her profession was running, and gathered them up for me.

    Almost all of them made the happy adaptation and wound up thrilled that spreadsheets were doing the math for them, could be printed out neatly, etc. They moved on to email & such… probably are surfing the Net as I type.

    I was fortunate enough to start my working life at the very beginning of computers moving into business in a significant way, so I was not confronted with such in mid-life. But look at something like watching TV on the computer… I took to it right away, and it’s taken a year or so for Mr WereBear to get comfy with it.

    Why? I don’t know! I’m trying to think of something I’m “old and cranky” about, and nothing comes to mind.

  35. 35.

    OzarkHillbilly

    December 15, 2013 at 9:11 am

    @jeffreyw: Remember the TA and YO prefixes? I don’t remember any others. Maybe someone can jog a memory?

  36. 36.

    mai naem

    December 15, 2013 at 9:11 am

    @Amir Khalid: That is pathetically sad. I used to be very pro Israel and in the past decade just become less and less so. The way they’ve handled the Ethiopian Jews. They had second tier pols going to the Mandela tribute because Netanyahu is basically too much of an asshole to go. The spying. The anti-Obama stuff that comes across just a tad birtherish. WTF?

  37. 37.

    WereBear

    December 15, 2013 at 9:13 am

    @Phylllis: When I asked her one time why she wouldn’t just leave a message, she said “I’m not talking to a damn machine.” Wanted to ask her wtf she thought the telephone itself was.

    I’m in a rural area and we still have a significant percentage of people who won’t leave a message. I don’t understand it… you called to tell me something. TELL ME.

    And if you called to ask something, half the time I’ve got to look it up and call you back, ANYWAY.

  38. 38.

    mai naem

    December 15, 2013 at 9:18 am

    @Violet: Well, Snowbird Snooki can go on the lamestream media and call Pope Frank a Freedumb lovin’ Marxist lover.

  39. 39.

    Violet

    December 15, 2013 at 9:18 am

    @WereBear: It’s come full circle. Young people don’t leave nearly as many voicemail messages as people their age used to. Why bother when the person you called can see you called on their phone log? Or you can just text them. People leave messages for business purposes, but personal voicemail messages are diminishing.

  40. 40.

    OzarkHillbilly

    December 15, 2013 at 9:22 am

    @WereBear:

    I’m trying to think of something I’m “old and cranky” about, and nothing comes to mind.

    Boy, it sure doesn’t take me long and the list is almost endless!

    On the slightly more serious side, the things that irritate me the most are the machines that take over jobs that humans used to do. I refuse to use the self checkout lanes. Not because I don’t want to “learn” how to do it, but because I don’t want to lose that little bit of face to face human interaction from my life. My life would be so much blander if I couldn’t flirt with the checkout person (and yeah, I flirt with the guys too. The looks are priceless).

    I really hate talking machines (must have destroyed a dozen or so “talking coke machines”), and nothing drives me over the edge quicker than a phone menu.

  41. 41.

    WereBear

    December 15, 2013 at 9:22 am

    @Violet: I’ll admit I didn’t get texting at first, but soon realized the efficiency of sending a written message. It appears without the other person needing to do anything.

    Of course, it’s not perfect, either… a co-worker picked me up for a seminar, and we were already underway when my phone beeped with her “I’m here” text message.

  42. 42.

    WereBear

    December 15, 2013 at 9:28 am

    @OzarkHillbilly: nothing drives me over the edge quicker than a phone menu.

    They are designed to annoy (don’t call us, just go away!) though I rarely do better with an actual person once I get them.

    Ever noticed how businesses have outsourced their customer service to YOU, the customer? YOU sort out where the problem is supposed to go, YOU enter your customer number a dozen times, YOU gather the paperwork, YOU come up with the solution half the time!

  43. 43.

    mai naem

    December 15, 2013 at 9:30 am

    @WereBear: My mom does not understand the concept of Voicemail. She thinks it’s like an answering machine where you can hear the person leaving the message. Her voicemail messages to our cell phones inevitably are “okay, pick the phone up…. pick the phone up….okay now pick the phone up”,

  44. 44.

    OzarkHillbilly

    December 15, 2013 at 9:35 am

    @WereBear:

    you called to tell me something. TELL ME.

    No no no, I called to talk to you, not some damn machine!

  45. 45.

    OzarkHillbilly

    December 15, 2013 at 9:37 am

    @WereBear: That is at least a goodly part of the source of my irritation.

  46. 46.

    greennotGreen

    December 15, 2013 at 10:14 am

    @WereBear: Unless you’re really old, DO NOT shrug off diminishing energy as the result of advancing age. I did that for a few months… before I was diagnosed with cancer. If everyday activities seem to leave you exhausted, see your doctor!

  47. 47.

    rikyrah

    December 15, 2013 at 10:25 am

    2013 Heisman Trophy speech video: Jameis Winston becomes youngest winner of award

    By Pete Volk @Pete_Volk on Dec 14 2013, 9:41p

    At 19 years old, Jameis Winston has become the youngest player ever to win the Heisman Trophy award, winning out over fellow finalists Johnny Manziel, Jordan Lynch, Andre Williams, Tre Mason and A.J. McCarron.

    http://youtu.be/Yxr6Gmsii8c

  48. 48.

    rikyrah

    December 15, 2013 at 10:26 am

    @WereBear:

    I’m in a rural area and we still have a significant percentage of people who won’t leave a message. I don’t understand it… you called to tell me something. TELL ME.

    my mother died refusing to have an answering machine or voicemail, let alone call waiting.

    ” if they want to talk to me, they’ll call back”

  49. 49.

    WereBear

    December 15, 2013 at 10:43 am

    @greennotGreen: I agree… I think a LOT of what gets blamed on “old age” is a health problem that needs addressing.

    Best wishes to you on your issue!

  50. 50.

    Villago Delenda Est

    December 15, 2013 at 10:44 am

    The bottom line here is there are some kids who need to get off my lawn.

  51. 51.

    tybee

    December 15, 2013 at 11:00 am

    @OzarkHillbilly:

    as i recall, the 2 letter prefix to the 5 digit number was the telephone exchange.

    FairFax exchange on the west coast of georgia was FA and then the number.

    i was told that it was a holdover from the “operator assisted” era.

  52. 52.

    Bob Munck

    December 15, 2013 at 11:09 am

    I’d like to encourage the playing of Tom Rush music whenever possible. My wife and I have driven many thousands of miles to see him live a few hundred times in the 50 years since we started driving from Providence to Club 47 in Cambridge. He’ll be at the Birchmere in Alexandria in March.

  53. 53.

    Lurking Buffoon

    December 15, 2013 at 11:31 am

    Gotta say, the article seems consistent with my understanding of aging and anthropology. Most cultures around the world view olds as a repository of knowledge and wisdom, which is extremely useful for a nomadic species… especially when the young need training and their parents are off hunting and gathering.

  54. 54.

    Ben Franklin

    December 15, 2013 at 11:32 am

    “Snowden was important. He accelerated the debate”

    Yup. Hayden just said it on MTP.

    “I wouldn’t negotiate amnesty with him. It might encourage other Snowdens’

    Well, he is an ass-backwards bureaucrat, sho he sees no inconsistency in his perverted and corrupted thought stream.

  55. 55.

    Ben Franklin

    December 15, 2013 at 11:45 am

    http://www.japantimes.co.jp/news/2013/12/15/asia-pacific/china-bans-shellfish-from-u-s-west/#.Uq3daCjTKFJ

    ““They’ve never done anything like that, where they would not allow shellfish from this entire area based on potentially two areas or maybe just one area,” said Jerry Borchert of the Washington Department of Health. U.S. officials think the contaminated clams came from Washington or Alaska but are waiting for more details from China to help identify the exact source.”

    FUKUSHIMA

  56. 56.

    Ruckus

    December 15, 2013 at 11:55 am

    what’s on the agenda for the day?
    Do as little as possible to rest this tired old bod. And I’m not really all that old. It just feels like it some/many days.

  57. 57.

    Ruckus

    December 15, 2013 at 11:57 am

    @raven:
    I think you have the answer.

  58. 58.

    smedley the uncertain

    December 15, 2013 at 12:09 pm

    @OzarkHillbilly: Two exchange names I remember from the 50’s in NJ were: TUxedo and EXeter. In PA, we had HYatt. Even remember the number… HY 34165.
    How come I can’t remember anything else.

  59. 59.

    Ruckus

    December 15, 2013 at 12:11 pm

    @WereBear:
    One of the great lessons my dad taught me, even if he didn’t know he was doing it, was that new stuff will always be around and it won’t always be better but most of the time it will, so, embrace it. Probably one of the best lessons in life. New is everywhere, if you only fight it you get left behind. To me that is the overriding base problem with conservatives, everything must remain the same. But it never does no matter what and constantly fighting that insures that you get left farther and farther behind. And you become totally irrelevant much sooner than normal aging causes. Course you make life miserable for millions along the way, which may or may not be a positive for assholes.

  60. 60.

    smedley the uncertain

    December 15, 2013 at 12:22 pm

    Agenda for the Day, same as yesterday… Snow removal again! Shovel, snow blow, shovel…. White Christmas?? Bah! Humbug!

  61. 61.

    ruemara

    December 15, 2013 at 12:35 pm

    I’ve always seen nostalgia as pining for something that never was. Got up too late for the cafe life breakfast, so it’s a warm thermos of tea and a brisk walk to the theatre. You olds stay offa mah lawn.

  62. 62.

    Felonius Monk

    December 15, 2013 at 12:52 pm

    including reassurance that an inability to remember names, find the right word and even recall what you were intending to do is part of the normal aging process and is rarely an early harbinger of dementia…

    Oh,thank God, the FSM, or whoever. And here I thought that this was the result of low testosterone, e. d., and a misspent youth.

  63. 63.

    Ruckus

    December 15, 2013 at 1:58 pm

    @Felonius Monk:
    If you had fun how could your youth be misspent?

  64. 64.

    Ben Franklin

    December 15, 2013 at 6:06 pm

    It’s astounding how well the approach to Authoritay-y-y melds to conservatism. Incremental change often has strange bedfellows.

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