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You are here: Home / Pet Blogging / Cat Blogging / You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch

You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch

by John Cole|  December 26, 201311:15 pm| 51 Comments

This post is in: Cat Blogging, Dog Blogging

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That’s all I thought of when I was cropping this Tunchesque picture of Steve from a few minutes ago:

mr.grinch

And here is sweet Lily:

sugarysweet

Her nails are so long I am embarrassed to post that picture, but I broke my nail cutters and we have not been to the vet in a while.

Oh, and this is where the picture of Rosie would be if she hadn’t seen me grab the camera and turned around and went into the bedroom under the bed. Guess she just decided she was having a bad camera day. God damned willful Jack Russell Terriers. Say what you want about cats, JRT’s own your ass. You are quite simply never going to do anything they don’t want to do without a lot of planning and deceit and then hurt feelings all around.

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Reader Interactions

51Comments

  1. 1.

    ? Martin

    December 26, 2013 at 11:25 pm

    Dremel tool with a sanding drum on the nails. No risk of cutting too deep. Works great – and you still have a Dremel tool…

  2. 2.

    Paddy

    December 26, 2013 at 11:25 pm

    Oh Cole, they’re just lovely. Lilly has that great hound face that I love so much in my Boo. It’s incredible to wake up in the middle of the night and find that greyed muzzle smack dab in the middle of my hand sleeping.

    Nails and us are a story. 15 minutes after they’re groomed they start clicking and the clicking drives me crazy. Oh well.

  3. 3.

    Fuzzy

    December 26, 2013 at 11:27 pm

    Just take Lilly for walks on a hard road or sidewalk and the nails will wear down until they don’t land first. That is the cheap and painless method for all plus the walk is good for all.

  4. 4.

    burnspbesq

    December 26, 2013 at 11:29 pm

    Lee hit Morgan in the ribs with the first ball. With the second, he went head-hunting. Ribs again on ball three. Ball four, behind his head. Wicket taken on ball five, but it’s a no-ball (Lee stepped over the restraining line), so it doesn’t count. The last ball of the over whistles by his ear.

    Hilarious.

  5. 5.

    Yatsuno

    December 26, 2013 at 11:31 pm

    Handsome kitteh iz handsome.

    Quick update: I took a few steps today. Dunno where that puts me on the progress chart but it’s a start.

  6. 6.

    Mnemosyne (iPhone)

    December 26, 2013 at 11:32 pm

    Poor G got scratched up good by Annie the other day when he tried to put her in her carrier to take her to the groomer’s and she decided that the shortest distance between her and freedom was up and over his head. So scratches on his hand, arm, shoulder, forehead, and scalp (with the hand being the worst because that was where she launched herself from).

    As we told her, it did not exactly make a good case for her NOT needing a nail trim, which she got after we dragged her out from under the bed.

  7. 7.

    burnspbesq

    December 26, 2013 at 11:32 pm

    @Yatsuno:

    Excellent. You’ll do the march to the stadium on opening day at this rate.

  8. 8.

    Cassidy

    December 26, 2013 at 11:36 pm

    Oh look, more cat and dog pictures. Just start wearing a mumu already.

  9. 9.

    Time Travelin

    December 26, 2013 at 11:36 pm

    That pic of Steve is epic. That needs to be made into some BJ merchandise, stat. If not for the purrfection of Tunch as BJ mascot, I would advocate that as well.

  10. 10.

    Ash Can

    December 26, 2013 at 11:38 pm

    If you were to shear Steve and make yarn from the cuttings, you’d get a whole new sweater wardrobe out of it (not to mention a busted jaw and concussion from a haymaker landed by one of those paws).

  11. 11.

    Yatsuno

    December 26, 2013 at 11:40 pm

    @efgoldman: This was in the parallel bars, next step around is to get me into a walker. The steps need to be steadier than they are right now though. But I got somewhere.

  12. 12.

    Cliff in NH

    December 26, 2013 at 11:40 pm

    @Fuzzy:

    every dog is different, molly wears her outer claws on pavement, saving the middle claws for sprinting on grass/loam. I gotta trim the middle ones cause she won’t let them wear.

  13. 13.

    Roger Moore

    December 26, 2013 at 11:45 pm

    @? Martin:

    Dremel tool with a sanding drum on the nails. No risk of cutting too deep.

    OTOH, it involves Mr. Cole operating a power tool, which is a sure recipe for amusing self-injuries.

  14. 14.

    Jane2

    December 26, 2013 at 11:49 pm

    @Yatsuno: Pet pics *and* steps! Excellent progress in both.

  15. 15.

    MikeJ

    December 26, 2013 at 11:57 pm

    @Yatsuno: Still on for handegg Sunday?

  16. 16.

    Yatsuno

    December 27, 2013 at 12:05 am

    @efgoldman: I have a decent amount of arm strength on both sides, so that helps immensely. I’m also starting to understand how to decrease the weight on the left leg enough to take the step with the right. No marathons anytime soon but bit by bit.

    @MikeJ: It’s a date! You, me, CaseyL, anyone else in the area who wants to show up as well. I’ll have to do Stupid Human Tricks for you guys but hopefully it’ll happen close to end of quarter or something.

  17. 17.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    December 27, 2013 at 12:07 am

    @burnspbesq: Your pets sound even more entertaining than Cole’s.

  18. 18.

    Suzanne

    December 27, 2013 at 12:08 am

    @Yatsuno: you’ll be both kicking ass AND taking names in no time.

    Steve is just lovely. As is Lily, of course. But Rosie is my favorite. An obstinate PITA with a keen mind, and a heart of gold. Kinda sounds like our blog host.

    I am eating my second piece of Yule log. It is fucking awesome. I have become quite the fatass in the past month.

  19. 19.

    max

    December 27, 2013 at 12:26 am

    but I broke my nail cutters and we have not been to the vet in a while.

    You were supposed to say ‘but I left the nail cutters in the glove box of the Subaru.’

    @Roger Moore: OTOH, it involves Mr. Cole operating a power tool, which is a sure recipe for amusing self-injuries.

    Well, 1), I find that the noise from the Dremel upsets the animals more than the clippers do, which 2), since this would involve Cole, would mean hideous flailing and freaking out by the animals resulting in entertaining injuries long before Cole ever got to sanding any nails, which 3), would be followed by Cole flailing from the pet-inflicted injuries which would, in turn, cause Cole to wind up breaking the Dremel on his face. Thus, he would never accidentally sand himself. {insert entertaining Tom & Jerry noises here}

    @Yatsuno: Quick update: I took a few steps today. Dunno where that puts me on the progress chart but it’s a start.

    If the stitches are not ripped and the fever is not raging, and the swelling is less swelly, you’re in good shape! Huzzah!

    max
    [‘One step at a time. No hurry.’]

  20. 20.

    SectionH

    December 27, 2013 at 12:32 am

    @burnspbesq: LOL. Still waiting to hear from the ppl on site.

  21. 21.

    ? Martin

    December 27, 2013 at 12:34 am

    @Roger Moore:

    OTOH, it involves Mr. Cole operating a power tool, which is a sure recipe for amusing self-injuries.

    True. Cole would somehow manage to lose his spleen from a ½” handheld sanding drum.

  22. 22.

    Redshift

    December 27, 2013 at 12:40 am

    What, no comparison of Lily to the Grinch’s dog Max? Especially with the running and hiding…

  23. 23.

    Yatsuno

    December 27, 2013 at 12:43 am

    @max: Stitches are not ripping. Fever is not raging. Swelling is less swelly. I think the big point is I didn’t expect it to happen today, nor did I expect four steps to happen. Almost didn’t make it back to the chair before the legs said “SWEET MAMA MOSES!!!” but disaster was averted on that front.

  24. 24.

    asiangrrlMN

    December 27, 2013 at 12:47 am

    Sir Willie Whiskerton III grows more handsome by the day! A merry merry to you and yours, Cole – you big softy.

  25. 25.

    wasabi gasp

    December 27, 2013 at 12:48 am

    Enough with the glamor shots, Leibovitz. Go play with Nosferatu.

  26. 26.

    ? Martin

    December 27, 2013 at 12:53 am

    @Yatsuno: Well done, Yutsy! Glad to hear everything is going well. Keep up the healing.

  27. 27.

    PurpleGirl

    December 27, 2013 at 12:54 am

    Reposting this from the thread below:

    About a dog and a kitten: When the rescuers found the little dog they also had a surprise…

    http://www.quickmeme.com/p/3vqn1s

  28. 28.

    Violet

    December 27, 2013 at 12:59 am

    Lily! So good to see her. Those are some impressive nails. Lady needs a manicure.

  29. 29.

    Yatsuno

    December 27, 2013 at 1:09 am

    @PurpleGirl: SQUEE!!!!

  30. 30.

    JordanRules

    December 27, 2013 at 1:09 am

    @PurpleGirl: Adorable! I hope they have a wondeful, warm home together now.

  31. 31.

    Violet

    December 27, 2013 at 1:14 am

    @Yatsuno: Congrats! Progress is definitely a good thing. Glad you are healing.

  32. 32.

    PurpleGirl

    December 27, 2013 at 1:15 am

    @JordanRules: In the morning I’ll do some research to find out how they are now.

  33. 33.

    Violet

    December 27, 2013 at 1:19 am

    @PurpleGirl: Oh, how sweet! Too cute.

  34. 34.

    Anne Laurie

    December 27, 2013 at 1:23 am

    @Cassidy: You just don’t want to be popular, do you? (pat, pat)

    @Ash Can:

    If you were to shear Steve and make yarn from the cuttings, you’d get a whole new sweater wardrobe out of it

    Spinners say cat hair makes lousy yarn, actually — they sometimes mix a particular cat’s hair with lamb wool as a novelty, but ‘cat’ is not worth using as a fiber. Dog hair, on the other hand — at least from dogs with proper fuzzy undercoats — is a fine fiber, which many a Malamute or Samoyed owner can attest. And you don’t even have to shear most ‘sled dogs’, they will happily shed out entire shopping bags of lovely fiber every Spring… whether you have a use for it or not!

  35. 35.

    Calming influence

    December 27, 2013 at 1:23 am

    Re: dognails: John, if you have a Dremel tool or can borrow one, this is the way to go. Not that YOU should ever approach a dog with a power tool; get someone who has experience as well as all their fingers.

  36. 36.

    Anne Laurie

    December 27, 2013 at 1:24 am

    @Yatsuno: Good for you! Here’s to a 2014 where you can kick arse without hurting yourself…

  37. 37.

    Calming influence

    December 27, 2013 at 1:35 am

    @Anne Laurie: Hi, my name is Calming, and I’m a spinner. [Oh wait, this isn’t Spinners Anonymous; never mind…]
    Even long cat hair is a little too short, and doesn’t lock in well like wool (sheep, llama, alpaca)

    Like you said, it can be included in roving that you’re spinning to make cool novelty yarns, but you need to dye the wool roving first, or you’ll mess up the cat hair color when you dye it.

  38. 38.

    Calming influence

    December 27, 2013 at 1:41 am

    P.S. email to my business partner: “I got some raw wool and spun about 250 yards on my spinning wheel. I took that and plyed it into 125 yards of 2-ply yarn. I hand-dyed it a beautiful golden color with mushrooms I collected on our property, and then knitted it into a scarf for my sweety-pie. So what did you get YOUR wife for Christmas?”

    Haven’t heard back yet.

  39. 39.

    Calming influence

    December 27, 2013 at 1:53 am

    Separated from Steve at birth? The background image of my twtter page is “Moose”, our rescue Maine Coon. (https://twitter.com/jexter) He was the runt of the litter, given to an elderly woman who couldn’t handle a kitten so she kept him locked up in the bathroom for 6 months before we got him. Now he’s got the run of a big house and two cat buddies who both outweigh him by10 pounds easy, yet he’s the guy running the show. Moooooose!

  40. 40.

    Mnemosyne (iPhone)

    December 27, 2013 at 1:55 am

    @Yatsuno:

    These t-shirts are meant for cyclists, but it sounds like it could come in handy for you right now, too.

    @Calming influence:

    IIRC, some dogs have hair and some dogs have fur, but only one kind spins well.  (I’m assuming it’s the ones who have fur, because human hair doesn’t spin well, either, though it does incorporate itself into knitting pretty smoothly.)

    I’ve tried my hand at hand-spinning, but I just can’t get into it. I might do better on a wheel, but I don’t have an extra $600 to find out.

  41. 41.

    Mister Papercut

    December 27, 2013 at 1:55 am

    @PurpleGirl: I’d appreciate the update. I followed the story when it first came out — June-ish of last year, maybe? But there didn’t end up being the updates you’d expect. I want to say they said they named them Goldie and Kate, they went into foster, and… that’s it, really. :\

  42. 42.

    Calming influence

    December 27, 2013 at 2:10 am

    @Mnemosyne (iPhone): I started when we moved to the Pacific Northwest. The number of different mushrooms I found on our property the first year we lived here just amazed me, so I went to a mycology club meeting. There was someone talking about what great color-fast dyes come from mushrooms, so when I got home I tried to dye a t-shirt with mushrooms. It turns out cotton doesn’t take up dye as well as wool, so I went to a fiber arts group and bought a sheep fleece out of some dude’s car trunk in the parking lot ( it was probably a hot fleece). I was able to dye the wool some beautiful colors, but then what? So I made a drop spindle and started spinning it. Then I bought a spinning wheel, and was spinning and dying yarn for friends who knit, and finally, this month, taught myself the basics of how to knit.

  43. 43.

    jl

    December 27, 2013 at 2:28 am

    Thanks for excellent pet pix. Those look like two happy animals who know who are in charge.

    And it looks like Rosie has inherited the TunchGeist, or TunchForce, or Tunchitude, whatever you want to call that devil may care eff off attitude. Though seems like Rosie can be cranky about it, rather than serenely Saturnine.

  44. 44.

    bago

    December 27, 2013 at 2:38 am

    I was trying to watch O’Donnell, but it’s obvious that he’s all “old school boots on the ground” kind of guy when it comes to analytics. He apparently doesn’t understand that machines hoover up ALL of the data and crams it into a database, all neatly indexed on multiple vectors.

    The algorithms do all of that work, much in the way that Google Spiders, Amazon BuyXGetY (recommendations for related books) and Facebook recommend friends to you. At this point the machines have watched you. Lawrence is under the impression that this work requires humans. This is false.

    Humans enter into the picture when they construct a query against the database, like graph search on Facebook, except you get everything on the friends list, but their friends, their friends, GPS location on your cellphone, timestamps for your interactions. It’s all been seen by machines, and is served up on a platter with a search engine.

  45. 45.

    Montarvillois

    December 27, 2013 at 4:40 am

    Look at gorgeous Lily! And to think twas not so long ago Cole was trash talkin’ her appearance. Tsk, tsk.

  46. 46.

    Cassidy

    December 27, 2013 at 6:58 am

    @Anne Laurie: it’s overrated.

  47. 47.

    Gretchen

    December 27, 2013 at 7:05 am

    @Yatsuno: good start!

  48. 48.

    kindness

    December 27, 2013 at 9:57 am

    Hey John. Get someone to Photoshop Santa hats onto those critter photos. You’ve got your new Balloon Juice mugs & t-shirts right there.

  49. 49.

    mzrad

    December 27, 2013 at 10:01 am

    Ha ha: Steve always looks stoned or sleepy. Nice.

  50. 50.

    GHayduke (formerly lojasmo)

    December 27, 2013 at 10:17 am

    @Yatsuno:

    It puts you on the progress chart, that’s for certain.

  51. 51.

    Ginny

    December 27, 2013 at 11:17 am

    We had a Maine Coon who’s name was Brutus. Looked just like Steve and apparently had the same dispostion. Brutus lived 20 years and if I ever wish I could have a cat cloned, Brutus would have been that cat! We have 2 bassets now, but am thinking we need another Maine Coon Cat! Thank you for the pictures and stories.

    Ginny

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