Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

New McCarthy, same old McCarthyism.

I’ve spoken to my cat about this, but it doesn’t seem to do any good.

Why is it so hard for them to condemn hate?

… pundit janitors mopping up after the GOP

Let there be snark.

The revolution will be supervised.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

Infrastructure week. at last.

If you are still in the GOP, you are an extremist.

But frankly mr. cole, I’ll be happier when you get back to telling us to go fuck ourselves.

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

Everybody saw this coming.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

Why did Dr. Oz lose? well, according to the exit polls, it’s because Fetterman won.

They fucked up the fucking up of the fuckup!

I like you, you’re my kind of trouble.

The GOP couldn’t organize an orgy in a whorehouse with a fist full of 50s.

A democracy can’t function when people can’t distinguish facts from lies.

Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in morse code.

We are builders in a constant struggle with destroyers. let’s win this.

We still have time to mess this up!

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

The poor and middle-class pay taxes, the rich pay accountants, the wealthy pay politicians.

You are here: Home / Politics / Republican Venality / Late Night Horror Show: They Are Not Dead That Can Eternal Lie

Late Night Horror Show: They Are Not Dead That Can Eternal Lie

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Republicans are reaching deep into their criminal past to cheerlead Moar War, and the media reappearance of one particularly vile specimen nearly broke Mr. Pierce:

… There are a hundred other conservative critics of the administration who Meet The Press could have called to make the same case Elliot Abrams made yesterday — the administration is “withdrawing” from the Middle East, why are we not yet at war in Syria?, why are we not as yet bombing the hell out of Iran, Israel abandoned, etc, etc — who were not career disinformation specialists, and who did not lie to the country on the country’s own dime. Didn’t anyone there stop and think, geez, even on a holiday week, we can do better than to lend what’s left of our credibility and what’s left of the credibility of our show to a guy who has lied so extravagantly through his entire public career? Was there nobody on duty in upper echelons who remembers Iran-Contra? (It was in all the papers.)…

Honest answer? No, no there was not.

… The last time a president was as “bold” as Gregory wants this one to be, he lied us into a war that continues to wreak ruin to this day. Elliott Abrams was working for him at the time. The time before that, peasants got slaughtered and American nuns got raped and murdered, and archbishops got ventilated on the altar, and Elliott Abrams, to whom the Dancin’ Master directed his volley of bad history, cheered all of this on, lied about it as part of his official duties, and continues to believe that to have been the height of patriotism and public service. Ghosts of the dead should howl him awake every night. He should be spat upon by the surviving families of the dead every day on his way to teach his history class. History itself should vomit him out of its mouth. Journalism should revolt at the very sight of him. He should be whatever is one rung below a pariah. Instead, he gets a guest shot to tell the nation he has spent his career misleading into armed conflicts in which he never would have picked up a weapon or stood a post that its foreign policy is not blood-soaked enough for his taste. It was a living parable of the uselessness of dead memory.

In case there’s a misapprehension that Elliot might be loyal to anyone or anything other than his own interests, this note from Wikipedia:

During investigation of the Iran-Contra Affair, Lawrence Walsh, the Independent Counsel tasked with investigating the case, prepared multiple felony counts against Abrams but never indicted him. Instead, Abrams cooperated with Walsh and entered into a plea agreement wherein he pled guilty to two misdemeanors of withholding information from Congress. He was sentenced to a $50 fine, probation for two years, and 100 hours of community service. However, Abrams was pardoned by President George H. W. Bush, in December 1992 (as he was leaving office following his loss in that year in the U.S. presidential election)…

Nice company you’re fluffing, Mr. Gregory.

Reader Interactions

41Comments

  1. 1.

    piratedan

    another shining example of IOKIYAR, and these are the guys who get paid to appear and shill for the opposition . Thank the FSM that hardly anyone pays attention to that shit anymore.

  2. 2.

    Spaghetti Lee

    Damn, that’s some good spleen. I remember reading a lit critic who was tired of political thrillers written by liberals that were basically “Iran-Contra/Iraq War 2 except the good guys win this time.” She had a good point about wish fulfillment hurting one’s writing, etc., and is no conservative herself, but you look at Abrams and realize why people like reading that stuff: in real life, it never fucking happens.

  4. 4.

    askew

    Just continuing the never-ending trend of Republicans getting more morning time on Sunday shows. I am actually more offended by Newt Gingrich getting air time than Abrams.

    On a random note, I’ve been reading this article on what the top candidate for 2016 have been up to lately and I have to say I am disappointed. Only one candidate on the Dem side that I like, O’Malley. Our primary is sure going to look old with Hillary and Biden compared to the youngins running for the GOP ticket.

    That said, I’d kill to see an O’Malley – Christie or O’Malley – Walker race. We are likely to see Hillary – Cruz race instead. And considering Hillary’s ability to choke in during key moments in her career I am terrified.

  6. 6.

    Higgs Boson's Mate

    MTP has morphed into Dick Dynasty. Gregory is desperately attempting to bond with the poutrage crowd in order to ensure that he doesn’t get canned.

  10. 10.

    Liquid

    That “Press the Meat to Shitcan Dancing Dave?” post and Betty’s subsequent clarification — “Yeah, that was inside US media baseball-ish, even for Balloon Juice.” should be cherished.

  12. 12.

    Liquid

    @Little Boots: I have a friend who served a day in jail (No, it was not me. I drove him to his arraignment.) back in ~’09 for shall-we-say poor judgement.

    He went in on a Saturday; That next morning he joked about “Who wants to watch M.T.P.?” He was surprised when some other guy took offense, allegedly responding with “Dude, fuck David Gregory.”

  32. 32.

    Chris

    @Spaghetti Lee:

    Damn, that’s some good spleen. I remember reading a lit critic who was tired of political thrillers written by liberals that were basically “Iran-Contra/Iraq War 2 except the good guys win this time.” She had a good point about wish fulfillment hurting one’s writing, etc., and is no conservative herself, but you look at Abrams and realize why people like reading that stuff: in real life, it never fucking happens.

    These thrillers have always been wish fulfillment for partisans. Conservatives use them to imagine a world in which Our Heroes get to beat, kill and torture their way through every terrorist plot and the methods actually work. Liberals use them to imagine a world in which the people we pay to serve and protect us actually serve and protect us from the predators who’re doing the kind of harm to society that al-Qaeda and the KGB could only dream of. (“24” did a fuckton of pandering to both cliches, which is probably a big part of the reason for its success).

  39. 39.

    Liquid

    @Amir Khalid: How do ya know Noah wasn’t nine hundred years old and something about stories that are way older than said collection of blah blah b l-fuck it *drink*

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