The Sochi Olympic competitions have already begun, “32 hours before the opening ceremony”, to squeeze in trials for the dozen new medal events that have been added since 2010. Grantland‘s Katie Baker took the photo at the right, while answering the question “Just How Bad Is the Scene in Sochi?”
… Sportswriters are notorious for our incessant travel complaints, but these aren’t exactly your run-of-the-mill flight delays. Some things, like the tiles of fresh sod still being unrolled over dusty grounds, are the sort of last-minute scrambles that take place before just about every Olympics. (The tried-and-true Olympic hype cycle always begins with “OMG they’re not ready!” and ends with “OMG the athlete village has run out of condoms!”) These are nonstories…
But something like toxic sludge filling washbasins is another story entirely. As is a maintenance crew kicking down someone’s locked door to install a cable box. It’s a funny image that ties in to a lot of the preconceived notions North Americans have about this place and these people — in Soviet Russia, cable installs you, or whatever — but you wonder what kind of gun the workers, who have already reportedly endured abysmal conditions, must have been under to resort to putting boot to door.
When I got back to my hotel complex last night, I saw another door that shouldn’t have been left open, this one leading down to the cellar. I went down for a peek. As basements of hastily fabricated media housing complexes in corruption-plagued countries go, I imagine, it was not out of the ordinary: low, dripping ceilings; cords and cables slung inches away from dank puddles; workers’ belongings and equipment; a random Castaway-style handprint on a wall. Standard stuff. Then I came upon a small, poignant sculpture crafted out of tinfoil and propped up on a pipe. It was a hand, giving the middle finger. Whether the sentiment was directed at Russian President Vladimir Putin, or at some asshole foreman, or at me, I can’t say…
The pioneers of extreme sports, according to the Washington Post, are “aging”…
Eight years ago… [t]he action sports that would re-shape the Olympics menu and re-energize the Winter Games were ushered in by a brash group of talented, carefree athletes with big personalities and a thirst for danger.
And now? [Shaun] White is 27 years old, preparing for his third Olympics. His hair is short now. He’s earned millions of dollars. Maximizing his brand is a full-time job that requires its own staff. Snowboarding is just part of what he does — there’s a rock band, sporting apparel, a documentary he’s producing and more. He’s a full-fledged businessman now instead of a teenage snowboarder — unlike his competitors….
This year’s U.S. team also features 23 teenagers among its contingent of 230 Olympians, and includes 44 athletes who are 21 or younger.
But this might be the first Winter Olympics where the so-called youth movement starts to show its age. [Kelly] Clark started snowboarding before it was in the Olympics and before the X Games was a television magnet for the younger demographics. “Before it was cool,” as she puts it. Her personal growth can be charted through the Winter Games, from a carefree 18-year-old in Salt Lake City to an astute 30-year-old in Sochi…
But there’s still room for the exotic dreamers; Mental Floss has a roster of “18 Athletes Who Are Going to Sochi Alone”, like this guy:
If you do a Google search for the name Bruno Banani, you will get the German underwear company of that name. But it’s also the name of the first Winter Olympian from Tonga. Born Fuahea Semi, the Tongan rugby player and luger went by Bruno Banani to court sponsorship from the company. It was part of a deal endorsed by the Tongan royal family to enable the athlete to afford training in Germany with the world’s best lugers. The company insinuated that the name was just a coincidence that led to the sponsorship, but that story unraveled quickly. It wasn’t “just” a hoax; Semi legally changed his name to Bruno Banani. The International Olympic Committee decided that even though using a sponsor’s name is in bad taste, Banani is the name on his passport, so he will be the lone athlete representing Tonga at Sochi in the luge event.
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raven
Fackin Russkies
NotMax
In rooms of the press corps at Sochi
And most every athlete and coachy
What clogs up the sink
Gives off quite a stink
And is also as viscous as mochi
raven
“most Americans rebelled against the welfare state and the disincentive to work” Name that tune.
raven
Oh my fucking god, Joe accused Mika of a cheap shot. That is fucking rich.
BillinGlendaleCA
@raven: “Sold us a Free Lunch” by Saint Ronald Reagan?
OzarkHillbilly
@NotMax: OUCH!!! Can I quote you?
BillinGlendaleCA
Hey Joe, before the Republicans took over CA for 30 years, the UC was free.
BillinGlendaleCA
Are Joe and Micheal Steele arguing for single payer and free college? Nah, I must just be sleep deprived.
OzarkHillbilly
In other news, we have from the “Full of sound and Fury Signifying Sothing” file, New York regulator demands bank documents as investigation widens
New York state’s top financial regulator has demanded documents from more than a dozen banks including Barclays, Deutsche, Goldman Sachs and RBS as a probe widened into trading practices in the $5.3tn-a-day global foreign exchange markets.
So bankers are still crooked and no person will be found to have broken any actual laws…
mai naem
I wonder why somebody doesn’t ask Joe why he didn’t force his ex-wife to work since, goddamnit, she wasn’t working? Why is it always celebrated when a wealthy mother becomes a stay at home mom?
Then they have this idiot Raygun biographer who fails to mention that Raygun had Alzheimers at least by his second term and was being fed everything said.
OzarkHillbilly
(don’t ask me me how I got an ‘s’ where an ‘n’ goes) From the “Water is Still Wet” file, we have, Texas teenager suffering ‘affluenza’ avoids jail for second time
The psychologist, G Dick Miller, told CNN he wished he “hadn’t used that term. Everyone seems to have hooked on to it. We used to call these people spoiled brats.”
Yeah sh!thead, and we used to at least kick their asses every now and again. But I guess $450,000 a year can keep anybody out of jail
OzarkHillbilly
And lastly, from the “No Sh!t Sherlock” file we have,Fracking is depleting water supplies in America’s driest areas, report shows
America’s oil and gas rush is depleting water supplies in the driest and most drought-prone areas of the country, from Texas to California, new research has found.
Of the nearly 40,000 oil and gas wells drilled since 2011, three-quarters were located in areas where water is scarce, and 55% were in areas experiencing drought, the report by the Ceres investor network found.
Fracking those wells used 97bn gallons of water, raising new concerns about unforeseen costs of America’s energy rush.
Duuuuhhhhhhh…..
The Guardian is full of good news today.
What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?
@mai naem: She’s working. She has to have sex with Joe. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.
What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?
I wonder if this means Paul Ryan is positioning himself as the new moderate GOP daddy? He may see an opening with the Christie implosion, and he’s had the Beltway press corps calling him a wonk for years, which provides a thin veneer of competence/expertise. He seems like the kind of guy who the wingnuts would trust to really be on their side even if he panders to the middle. The wingnuts have become so knee jerk reactionary that I’m not sure that line is even possible to walk anymore, but if anyone has enough cred to walk it Ryan is probably the guy. I don’t think he’s polished enough yet to withstand the scrutiny of a Presidential run but I can’t think of another reason why he’d stick his neck out on this issue.
Baud
@What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?:
Paul Ryan is a little too scrawny to run for president. He should lift some weights.
Baud
Via TPM
Elizabelle
For the stranger than fiction category: breaking story out of Japan:
Renowned Japanese Composer Admits Fraud
Sounds like a movie.
Baud
@Elizabelle:
He might need to go on seppuku watch.
Elizabelle
@Baud:
Not awake yet. I was thinking, why did Sherrod Brown have any ties with Newsmax?
That “even” does some heavy lifting.
Baud
@Elizabelle:
I noticed that too. Hilarious.
Elizabelle
@Baud:
Are we nuclear blast survivors? Hello out there??
Omnes Omnibus
@What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?:
He needs to get reelected in Wisconsin in a district that is only R+3.
OzarkHillbilly
@Elizabelle:
It will be.
Elizabelle
I knew I liked our new governor.
And he is doing it on his own nickel, well aware of his predecessor’s ethical issues.
OzarkHillbilly
@Elizabelle: But who wants to have a beer with him?
Baud
@Elizabelle:
It’s what the Village always says Obama needs to do. But maybe it’ll work in Virginia.
Botsplainer
My Olympic prediction on tonight’s opening ceremony – I’m thinking that the grand stage area collapses due to shoddy construction methods and substandard materials (delivered with massive kickbacks) on worldwide TV. Half of the bolts from the structural supports will be missing and the installed bolts will shear off, being cast in some shoddy factory by drunken workers using an amalgam of lead and leftover plutonium tailings from pillaged missiles which are actually supposed to be in their silos and in active service. Aside from the initial video from the live broadcast of the event (which cuts away immediately due to technical difficulties), the journalists covering it won’t be able to report, as their broadband access will be curtailed by a confluence of factors – orders from Putin to contain the embarrassment, buggy and omnipresent FSV data mining for the sake of security, Russian written financial mining viruses piped straight in via the bribed broadband provider, and plain old incompetence at the broadband provider in providing poor connections.
Let the majesty of the games begin, and hopefully, they can keep the snowblowers working…
gene108
@Baud:
The problem is the MSM doesn’t understand that devout Muslims do not drink alcohol, therefore this is Obama’s problem in reaching out the GOP in this manner. There’s only so far you can get having folks drink root beer floats and not make them feel like they are five, when they really want a scotch and soda on the rocks.
Paul in KY
I actually saw White’s band ‘Bad Things’ perform at Voodoo Music Fest in NOLA back in early Nov. Didn’t even recognize him (his hair was short). He plays guitar & does some backup singing. The lead singer was pretty wild. During set he took a pumpkin and put it on his head & then ripped it into pieces & threw it into crowd. They played around 4 pm whatefer day it was. Band has a girl drummer who is about the prettiest drummer I’ve ever seen.
At time, had no idea he was in band. Went back & looked thru some pictures & yup, that’s him alright.
Elizabelle
@Botsplainer:
Interesting to contrast tonight’s opening ceremonies with Beijing’s, which were spectacular.
China had technical brilliance and badly polluted air. Russia has shoddy construction and Black Widows allegedly already in the arena.
What would the Olympics reveal about us, were we the hosts this year?
Botsplainer
@Elizabelle:
As a people, we tend to try to be good hosts for events like this. Think not so much a grand, technical spectacle (like China), but instead, a mostly competently executed visually pleasing event.
rikyrah
Good Morning, Everyone:)
Another Holocene Human
@Baud: Have their repealed Virginia’s weird and weirdly specific alcohol sales laws yet?
The south is so weird–cold beer at GAS STATIONS but g** f****** you want a mixed drink at a bar or want to buy a six pack after working a night shift or on your day off (Sunday) or go to a frigging PUB.
SC did get rid of those little 1oz bottles at bars, quite recently. I noticed they don’t card well-dressed 18 year olds. Hmmm.
VA used to require joints to do more food sales than alcohol to keep their license; kept the beer prices reasonable, fa fa!
At least in MA they didn’t play–you’re not picking up any alcohol at 7-11 or usually even the grocery store so fucking fuggedaboutit. That’s what the package store is for. Unfortunately they restricted those licenses SO much it created a “moral hazard” for legislators and there are allegations–yet, so far, AFAIK the only person to go to prison was the one trying to expose them–that Boston city and state regulators were taking deals/bribes in return for liquor licenses. Also, the pubs take your keys from you which is awesome. In MA they’re liable if you DUI after drinking there. And people bitch about the nanny state. They also inspect those raw clams everybody likes to eat.
Enjoy your seafood adventure on your Florida vacation. How will your gut bacteria respond to BP oil spill-super bacteria or that traditional Old Florida handshake–cholera? Find out!
Another Holocene Human
@rikyrah: Good morning. :)
Another Holocene Human
@Elizabelle: Somehow I suspect you aren’t talking about Scarlett Johanssen.
rikyrah
This is a hilarious post about Sochi
………………
The Sochi Olympics is the WalMart of Sporting Events
February 5, 2014 | Luvvie
The Sochi Winter Olympics has been steeped in controversy, seemingly from the start. When Vladimir Putin enacted those draconian laws against the LGBT community, criminalizing homosexuality, it set the tone for what was looking like the FuckShit Games. Then there’s been the terror threats. Folks have insisted that Russia was the wrong country to host, and they could not be more right because it’s not even Opening Ceremonies yet and foolishment abounds in Sochi.
Mind you, these Olympics are the most expensive ever, costing $51 billion. They went over budget by a cool $39 billy. That’s a whole lotta guap so you’d think all would be well. Nay, friend. NAY.
First there’s the issue of the killing of dogs. Sochi has thousands of strays roaming the streets so officials contracted a pest control company to poison them to fix the “problem” (the AP got that story). Deadspin was talmbout a dog that press fell in love with and ended up calling “Sausage.” Well, Sausage ain’t been seen for 3 days. :-/ Sausage gone, their canine dead.
They couldn’t find any other solution than to mass kill these dogs, doe? Russia, WHAT IS YOUR LIFE ABOUT RIGHT NOW?!?
Journalists are arriving at Sochi to get settled before the games kick off on February 7, and what they’ve found is chaos. The Washington Post did a piece on how journalists are live-tweeting the horrors and it all reads like a bad skit.
* About that lobby…
So it’s possible for you to show up to a hotel you booked and find that there’s no lobby. Marc MacKinnon, a correspondent for The Globe arrived at his lodging and there wasn’t a lobby so he had to check in through the room of the owner of the hotel.
…………
Seriously. This is all a complete and absolute utter FAIL. These Olympics are the WalMart of sporting events. SO bootleg. There’s a Twitter account for it too: @SochiProblems (and I’m following it because the tragedy is pure comedy).
http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com/2014/02/sochi-olympics-fail.html
Paul in KY
@rikyrah: It’s sorta weird to see a post from you & there’s not a big long news article attached. Raven will stroke out.
Oops, wrote too soon :-)
Amir Khalid
I saw the new Robocop today. Rather to my surprise, I liked it. There’s less black comedy this time around (no reference to the 6000 SUX, for instance) and no one’s face gets melted by toxic sewage, but it’s better and more thoughtful than the 1987 original. The militarisation of police operations and tactics is a more topical issue now for American viewers, as is the corruption of the federal legislative process by corporate interests. (The original Robocop focused only on local corruption in Detroit.) Strong recommend.
Cacti
I see that Jerry Seinfeld has become a new right wing hero on NewsMax.
Way to go Jer.
Another Holocene Human
@Amir Khalid: Robocop always struck me as being a serious manga that accidentally got made into an American live-action movie, including tragic hero whose strings are being pulled by forces he doesn’t understand.
Think Ghost in the Shell manga and that general genre and era. Evil megacorp CEOs &cet.
Petorado
The #SochiProblems hashtag is a hoot for its array of Soviet-era incompetence. While I feel bad for all the athletes and visitors that will have to survive these conditions, ruing their peak life experiences, it showcases what a corrupt and uncivilized mess Putin’s presiding over. For the next several weeks, the world’s attention will be focused on how dispirited Vladimir’s oppressive rule has made the nation and what a third-rate leader he really is. If there’s anything despots hate, it’s being laughed at by the rest of the world.
BubbaDave
@Baud: McAuliffe is less blah.
rikyrah
Dan Wetzel ✔
@DanWetzel
To anyone in Sochi: I am now in possession of three light bulbs. Will trade for a door handle. This offer is real:
The Snarxist Formerly Known as Kryptik
I…keep having to constantly remind myself that the internet is a bad gauge for how the mood is in the country in general.
It just gets fucking harder and harder to do so, when you end up finding articles about how the world ‘liberal’ has been demonized, and get 90% comments about how liberal was such a WONDERFUL word until those super-mega-ultra Anti-American commie traitormonsters ruined it with their insidious marxism and reverse racism.
Or articles about the double standard of who gets called ‘thug’ and not filled with comments about how black people are always thugs because they’re inherently hyper violent savage animals or some shit.
It wouldn’t be so hard to ignore this as froth of the fringes if this shit wasn’t perpetuated on the actual fucking media and mainstream shit like it was fucking gospel truth all the fucking goddamn time.. It just…makes me want to give up trying to say anything because it convinces me how impenetrable this shit really is outside of moderated forums.
RSA
@Baud:
Why can’t some Japanese customs be imported here? Ideally, in the banker class.
Heliopause
If any of you live within reach of CBC TV it’s already on the tube. Started 3 AM left coast time, in fact. No, I didn’t get up.
Calouste
Nothing new btw that Olympic events start before the opening ceremony. Ice hockey and soccer have been doing that for years.