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Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires republicans to act in good faith.

The willow is too close to the house.

Republican obstruction dressed up as bipartisanship. Again.

Is it irresponsible to speculate? It is irresponsible not to.

A Senator Walker would also be an insult to reason, rationality, and decency.

The poor and middle-class pay taxes, the rich pay accountants, the wealthy pay politicians.

Shallow, uninformed, and lacking identity

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Conservatism: there are some people the law protects but does not bind and others who the law binds but does not protect.

No one could have predicted…

I’ve spoken to my cat about this, but it doesn’t seem to do any good.

Pessimism assures that nothing of any importance will change.

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

Prediction: the GOP will rethink its strategy of boycotting future committees.

Let us savor the impending downfall of lawless scoundrels who richly deserve the trouble barreling their way.

You cannot shame the shameless.

Today’s GOP: why go just far enough when too far is right there?

It’s time for the GOP to dust off that post-2012 autopsy, completely ignore it, and light the party on fire again.

Tick tock motherfuckers!

The party of Reagan has become the party of Putin.

All your base are belong to Tunch.

We still have time to mess this up!

When do we start airlifting the women and children out of Texas?

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You are here: Home / Politics / Politicans / Cruz-ifiction / Open Thread: Return of the CPAC!!!

Open Thread: Return of the CPAC!!!

by Anne Laurie|  March 6, 20145:36 pm| 133 Comments

This post is in: Cruz-ifiction, Open Threads, Republican Stupidity, Assholes

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Politics doesn't get much more pathetic than this. pic.twitter.com/f6AmIvT3mw

— billmon (@billmon1) March 6, 2014

Joe Coscarelli, at NYMag:

It’s that time of the year again. All of the country’s important Republicans have gathered in Washington for the Conservative Political Action Conference, better known as CPAC, to stock up on talking points and bumper stickers for 2014. Kicking things off right this morning was Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, who gifted outgoing Oklahoma Senator Tom Coburn with a rifle onstage…

But I count on my favorite Speaker-to-Republican reporter to sniff out the true crazeballs. Dave Weigel:

NATIONAL HARBOR, Md.—It’s a short but frigid walk from CPAC to a less scripted and more intense all-day event. This year, as they’ve done since at least 2010, a group of foreign policy hawks and critics of “creeping Sharia” have put on an alternative program, inviting conservatives who either aren’t at the main event or being given only a little time there.

In the past, this event’s usually amounted to the Center for Security Policy’s Frank Gaffney reairing charges that Grover Norquist is a simp for the Muslim Brotherhood. It’s more fascinating this year—Breitbart (which sponsored 2013’s event) has teamed up with EMPact, a group that raises awareness of the danger of possible electromagnetic pulse attacks, to put on nine hours of national security speeches. Sen. Ted Cruz had given a pretty agreeable but rote speech at CPAC. He saved his best material for a 39-minute address at the alternative event.

“Speaking the truth speaks courage,” Cruz said at the start, “and that’s one thing that Frank Gaffney has an abundance of.”…

…”When Iran describes Israel as the Little Satan, and America as the Great Satan, we have every interest to make sure they don’t acquire the weaponry to kill millions of Americans.” Cruz imagined a nightmare scenario in which Iran detonated a bomb over “Tel Aviv or New York or Los Angeles.” Detonated here, the effects of an EMP attack could kill “tens of millions of Americans.”

Tens of millions? This was an incredibly effective line in the room, which contained about 100 people, to CPAC’s 11,000.

Do not turn your back on this guy. For all his furrin birth, he’s a true American Elmer Gantry, “… wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.”

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Reader Interactions

133Comments

  1. 1.

    Tommy

    March 6, 2014 at 5:42 pm

    Oh Iran. I did away with cable TV the other day and watched some political show on Hulu. I now can’t even find the program. A Republican was on saying we need more sanctions against Iran and maybe military action. The liberal surprised me. He asked, “when was the last time Iran attacked another nation? When? You are not saying anything cause it didn’t happen.”

  2. 2.

    David Koch

    March 6, 2014 at 5:42 pm

    The Return of C-CRAP

    /fixed

  3. 3.

    Zam

    March 6, 2014 at 5:42 pm

    Don’t conservatives continually claim that liberals are Satan? or at least Hitler? I know they at least think gays are of the devil. If we follow Teds advice should we never let these kinds of people near the levels of power in this nuclear armed nation?

  4. 4.

    Suffern ACE

    March 6, 2014 at 5:43 pm

    Ah. One is televised and the other is not. I think we should be covering the one that isn’t. That’s usually where the good stuff is.

  5. 5.

    jl

    March 6, 2014 at 5:47 pm

    Shariah threat? That is so yesterday.

    The Soviet threat is the happening thing.

    I mean, yeesh, they even could have re-used their ‘Gates of Vienna!’ banner. And both Great Satans hate gays, artistic freedom, protest, dissident press, er… I mean, cultural decadence and decline.

    There is simply no excuse for that weak work.

  6. 6.

    Belafon

    March 6, 2014 at 5:50 pm

    While Kos and others have done pretty well setting up Netroots Nation, the left needs to set up a couple more of these type conferences, mainly to get media attention about it’s ideas.

  7. 7.

    raven

    March 6, 2014 at 5:51 pm

    @Belafon: Right.

  8. 8.

    GregB

    March 6, 2014 at 5:53 pm

    Mitch McConnell and Heston and the rest of these clownholes take their stage craft from their real mentors.

  9. 9.

    Belafon

    March 6, 2014 at 5:55 pm

    @Belafon: We don’t want to always play their games, but getting people together to make a bunch of noise about taking care of the poor, supporting the right to choose, etc., wouldn’t hurt.

  10. 10.

    Tommy

    March 6, 2014 at 5:55 pm

    @Belafon: IMHO folks don’t care that much about ideas, otherwise they’d listen to the stuff out of CPAC and run for the hills.

  11. 11.

    shelly

    March 6, 2014 at 5:57 pm

    Oh, if only that gun (musket?) had accidently gone off, causing McConnell to have a little accident. I guess God doesn’t love us enough.

  12. 12.

    Chris

    March 6, 2014 at 5:58 pm

    “Speaking the truth speaks courage,” Cruz said at the start, “and that’s one thing that Frank Gaffney has an abundance of.”…

    There’s something truly pathetic about right wing shills’ belief that being paid by people who agree with you, to tell an audience of people who agree with you, that you agree with them, in a country where free speech is a constitutionally protected right, somehow takes “courage.”

  13. 13.

    David Koch

    March 6, 2014 at 6:00 pm

    The Flying Spaghetti Monster doesn’t love us enough to give Canada’s Rafael Cruz the nomination.

    The plutocrats don’t have anyone to put their money behind. No one. Which makes me think they will fund and foment a fake grass roots effort push Mittens into the race.

  14. 14.

    Calouste

    March 6, 2014 at 6:02 pm

    @Tommy:

    On the other hand, Iran got invaded/occupied/couped in IIRC 1916, 1923, 1942, 1953 and 1980, with of course Anglo-Persian, now British Petroleum treating the country as their own private oil pump for most of that time. And that’s just the 20th century, we’re not talking about the Great Game between Russia and Britain that proceeded that. There’s a reason Iran wants some deterrent.

  15. 15.

    Bubblegum Tate

    March 6, 2014 at 6:03 pm

    @jl:

    Shariah threat? That is so yesterday.

    Besides, Republicans have gone from warning about Sharia to attempting to install the Christian variant of it.

  16. 16.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 6, 2014 at 6:04 pm

    Funniest thing I’ve seen so far is The Outlaw Jersey Whale telling Harry Reid to stop picking on the Koch brothers. He referred to Fred’s heirs as “entrepreneurs” and, wait for it, job-creators.

  17. 17.

    Tommy

    March 6, 2014 at 6:05 pm

    @Chris: I often joke if I was an evil person I could come up with some bizarre conspiracy theory. Set up a web site and get these rubes to send me money. The more crazy the idea the better the scheme might work. If some media outlet actually picked up my rant and showed it was totally false, I’d just yell “see the lame stream media is all against us.” They have this racket down to an art form.

  18. 18.

    feebog

    March 6, 2014 at 6:06 pm

    Did Cruz recite “Green eggs and ham” this time?

  19. 19.

    piratedan

    March 6, 2014 at 6:19 pm

    well it’s nice to see Bagman Tom shuffle off into the griftiness, lets hope that Oklahoma doesn’t replace him with someone even more heinous, although I won’t hold my breath.

  20. 20.

    Hungry Joe

    March 6, 2014 at 6:23 pm

    @Chris: They also like to spout crap like “Only in America could we be having this conversation,” because, you know, we’re the only free people in the world. If you expressed an opinion in, say, oh, I don’t know, let’s see, just off the top of my head … Canada, Iceland, Ireland, England, Norway, Denmark, Sweden, Belgium, France, Spain, Portugal, Italy, Germany, Luxembourg, Austria, the Netherlands, Switzerland, Czech Republic, Latvia, Estonia, Lithuania, Slovakia, Bulgaria, Greece, Israel, Australia, New Zealand, Brazil, Argentina, Uruguay, Chile, Panama, or Costa Rica, why, you’d be thrown into a dungeon. Because we’re the freedom-est people ever.

  21. 21.

    Tommy

    March 6, 2014 at 6:32 pm

    @Hungry Joe: I was watching some political talk show on Hulu. The liberal was a Brit. The conservative said if they had more guns in England less people would be killed being robbed. The British guy look confused by this statement, and said he thought the number of murders during a robbery were 34 in 2012. The American said those 34 would be alive today if they had a gun. It was at this point I turned off the television and realized nothing is going to change in this country.

  22. 22.

    Mark B.

    March 6, 2014 at 6:36 pm

    An EMP isn’t going to kill tens of millions of people. It’s going to fry all of their electronic devices and destroy a lot of the power infrastructure, which may eventually result in a some deaths, but I doubt it will be anywhere near the tens of millions. Essential services should recover in a few days or weeks at most.

  23. 23.

    Chris

    March 6, 2014 at 6:37 pm

    @Tommy:

    The Iranian revolution is an interesting case of the entire “civilized” world losing its shit at the sight of what they thought was a regime of Dark Ages lunatics bent on Armageddon who couldn’t be bought, bullied, reasoned or negotiated with…

    … and yet, oddly enough, the Iranians aren’t the ones who started a war of aggression in 1980, nor were they the ones who used chemical weapons in an attempt at large-scale extermination during (and after) that war. Nope, that was the civilized, secular, modernist, Western AND Soviet backed Iraqi government.

    It’s not the only time we’ve painted our enemies as inhuman savages in order to feel better about our own behavior in being (or at least, enabling) inhuman savages, but it’s one of the more egregious ones in recent history.

  24. 24.

    GxB

    March 6, 2014 at 6:38 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    He referred to Fred’s heirs as “entrepreneurs” and, wait for it, job-creators.

    Let’s see: morticians, toxic dump remediators, cancer specialists, lawyers, think tank spin doctors, media lackies, ALEC stooges, goons to keep the grunts from getting uppity… oh and let’s not forget – tons of lobbyists.

    He’s not entirely lying.

  25. 25.

    Chris

    March 6, 2014 at 6:39 pm

    @jl:

    Shariah threat? That is so yesterday.
    …
    The Soviet threat is the happening thing.

    No, no. The Soviets are the good guys, as led by their bold and brave Manly Man Vladimir Putin, boldly facing the metrosexual man-child and weak tyrant Barack Obama.

  26. 26.

    MomSense

    March 6, 2014 at 6:39 pm

    I want to point and mock but I just feel like crying. I said in the previous thread that my son’s school had a lockdown drill so I had the pleasure of hearing about where they would hide and what they would do if the hypothetical gunman were to get in their classroom.

    Then I got home and read the newsletter from the food bank to which I donate and volunteer. We have a backpack program where teachers are given food to put in backpacks so kids have food over the weekend. One of the teachers reported that one of her students looked in his backpack, saw the canned pineapple, and gave her a huge hug saying “how did you know pineapple is my favorite”.

    These CPAC assholes are evil.

  27. 27.

    Seanly

    March 6, 2014 at 6:41 pm

    I’m sure EMPact doesn’t have any over-priced will-never-be-used low quality survival gear to sell the rubes savvy Tea Party folks.

    Speaking of Tea Party, can the media stop using “Tea Party favorite”? That was tiresome 4 years ago. A tea party favorite is just a conservative Republican.

  28. 28.

    Violet

    March 6, 2014 at 6:47 pm

    @MomSense: In the 50’s and 60’s and maybe into the 70’s kids had drills about where they’d hide if there was a nuclear attack. Under the desks, of course. That would be safe!

  29. 29.

    GxB

    March 6, 2014 at 6:47 pm

    @Mark B.: You may be neglecting the mass suicides that would occur if Twitter/FB were down for more than twenty minutes.

  30. 30.

    Tommy

    March 6, 2014 at 6:47 pm

    @MomSense: My city used a government grant to build a food bank a few years ago. Some people were not so sure it was a good idea. They never said it, but you know poor people might come to out town. Oh crime.

    We built the thing. Has won every community service award the state of IL can give out. It appears they are very good at what they do. And often the local paper will print a story about all the folks they serve. Literally hundreds and hundreds.

  31. 31.

    Litlebritdiftrnt

    March 6, 2014 at 6:48 pm

    @Tommy:

    We had our own version of Sandy Hook back in 1996 when a mentally ill man went into a primary school and shot a bunch of kids. It happened the day my Dad died, and I remember my Mum saying “well your Dad went so he could lead those children to Heaven”. At that point the Government said you can’t have a gun unless it is stored in a Gun Club until you are going out hunting, and seeing as you don’t need a hand gun to hunt we’ll ban those too.

    My Uncle was an avid hunter, a signature dish at his restaurant was called “Poachers Pot” and consisted of Rabbit, Venison and Pheasant. It didn’t bother him one whit to keep his rifles at the gun club and going to sign it out when he went hunting.

    I am not surprised that the Brit looked non-plussed at the wingnut, there are 60 gun deaths A DAY in this country. Compared to the 34 a YEAR in the UK.

  32. 32.

    dedc79

    March 6, 2014 at 6:48 pm

    Suffice it to say that Grimes’ response was not exactly encouraging for those favoring some sanity on gun control: https://twitter.com/AlisonForKY/status/441610400438976512

  33. 33.

    NotMax

    March 6, 2014 at 6:49 pm

    The only thing worth paying attention to about CPAC is the inevitable story about the pinbacks, T-shirts, bumper stickers and other items which CPAC deemed too extreme for display and sale there, and what messages such things bore.

  34. 34.

    Chris

    March 6, 2014 at 6:50 pm

    @Seanly:

    I refuse to use the words “Tea Party,” simply because 1) I still have enough respect for the American Revolution not to associate the Boston Tea Party with these guys, and 2) writing it like “Tea Party” implies that it’s a separate party as opposed to the Republican Party with a shitty makeover, a fiction our media loves.

    “Teabaggers” is just fine with me. “Tea Party Movement,” if they absolutely want to be formal.

  35. 35.

    gbear

    March 6, 2014 at 6:51 pm

    @Belafon:

    …but getting people together to make a bunch of noise about taking care of the poor, supporting the right to choose, etc…

    Like this?

  36. 36.

    Hungry Joe

    March 6, 2014 at 6:55 pm

    @dedc79: 1) I agree; but 2) Ms. Grimes is running for Senate in the state of Kentucky, and she would like to win.

  37. 37.

    Calouste

    March 6, 2014 at 6:56 pm

    @Litlebritdiftrnt:

    Another thing gundamentalists “overlook” is that there are actually slightly more non-gun murders per 100,000 in the US than there are in the UK. So all those guns floating around don’t keep people safe from a knife attack.

  38. 38.

    MomSense

    March 6, 2014 at 6:56 pm

    @Violet:

    I remember those drills and I remember the day I found out about mutually assured destruction. I was so mad at my parents that they were talking so casually about something as insane as nuclear war.

    @Tommy:

    I’m glad they went ahead with the food bank.

  39. 39.

    Pogonip

    March 6, 2014 at 6:58 pm

    @Mark B.: That’s good to know because my car is computerized. I hope my insurance covers EMPs. Tried to find a non-computerized car but I guess they aren’t made anymore.

  40. 40.

    LanceThruster

    March 6, 2014 at 7:00 pm

    The Turtle will forget and use that long gun as a cane and blow his wrist plum off.

  41. 41.

    Tommy

    March 6, 2014 at 7:00 pm

    @Litlebritdiftrnt: My state, heck the area I live in is trying to limit guns, but running into the NRA. Heck the SCOTUS overturned our state law banning conceal carry permits a few months ago. Almost everybody I know owns a gun, like your uncle, to hunt. I don’t know many folks that want to run around town nor carry a gun on them, and I know some pretty darn Republican folks.

  42. 42.

    SiubhanDuinne

    March 6, 2014 at 7:01 pm

    @Litlebritdiftrnt:

    a mentally ill man went into a primary school and shot a bunch of kids. It happened the day my Dad died, and I remember my Mum saying “well your Dad went so he could lead those children to Heaven”.

    Geez, Litlebrit, have a heart, okay? That just shredded me.

    RIP your dad.

  43. 43.

    Roger Moore

    March 6, 2014 at 7:03 pm

    … wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.

    Sorry, but this quote needs to be updated. When Fascism comes to America, it will be burning a cross and wrapped in a Confederate battle flag.

  44. 44.

    Bobby Thomson

    March 6, 2014 at 7:04 pm

    @Chris: Koch Party Republicans. That’s what they are.

  45. 45.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 6, 2014 at 7:04 pm

    One of the teachers reported that one of her students looked in his backpack, saw the canned pineapple, and gave her a huge hug saying “how did you know pineapple is my favorite”.

    Must be springtime, my allergies are acting up.

    Jesus, I was disgusted by Paul Ryan’s blatherskyte about school lunches before I read that. How does a grownass man still believe in that Randian claptrap.

  46. 46.

    Roger Moore

    March 6, 2014 at 7:06 pm

    @Belafon:

    the left needs to set up a couple more of these type conferences, mainly to get media attention about it’s ideas.

    I think we need to set up and publicize more events like CPAC. Nothing will help liberals more than massive publicity for conservatives’ actual beliefs and platform.

  47. 47.

    JPL

    March 6, 2014 at 7:09 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: Because he got his government help and look what happened to him.

  48. 48.

    NotMax

    March 6, 2014 at 7:10 pm

    @MomSense – @Violet

    The elementary school I attended at the time had classes in grades K – 6. By the time was in sixth grade, there were a small smattering of us (3 in all out of the two 6th grade classrooms) who recognized the ludicrousness of the drills and refused to participate.

    Our ‘punishment’ was to have to trudge into the bowels of the school basement to be watched by the janitor, inside his supply closet, whenever a drill was held.

    Looking back, that gave us a miniscule (but statistically significant) better chance of immediate survival.

  49. 49.

    bago

    March 6, 2014 at 7:13 pm

    What kind of commie are you?
    http://dailycaller.com/2014/03/06/urgent-news-poll-who-would-make-a-better-president-obama-or-putin/

    Yup.

  50. 50.

    A Ghost To Most

    March 6, 2014 at 7:14 pm

    @Pogonip:
    Well, you could build a Faraday cage around the car with tinfoil. All the tinfoil hat folks would be jealous.

  51. 51.

    Frankensteinbeck

    March 6, 2014 at 7:15 pm

    @Chris:
    No, the Soviets are our Enemies, and it’s a damn shame that THEY have a really manly leader like Putin who invades countries at the drop of his shirt, while we have a selfish weakling like Obama who just sits around, makes a few phone calls, and watches as Putin ends up failing miserably without Obama having to touch him.

  52. 52.

    Tommy

    March 6, 2014 at 7:17 pm

    @NotMax: LOL. I did a speech on how stupid these drills were. That we were only 3.8 miles from the military base that would be hit, multiple times, and in like .003 seconds we’d be dead. Getting under our desk, well not really effective. This would be one of many times the school called my parents to say their son was being difficult.

  53. 53.

    MomSense

    March 6, 2014 at 7:18 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    Must be springtime, my allergies are acting up.

    And I really shouldn’t chop onions while reading the mail.

    @NotMax:

    Ok, that is funny!

  54. 54.

    Higgs Boson's Mate

    March 6, 2014 at 7:21 pm

    @Belafon:

    More large liberal events would be nice for liberals and that’s about it. I would imagine that Moral Mondays, no matter how big the crowd receive in-depth indifference. Let 200 wingnuts, or one Ted Nugent show up somewhere and sput gibberish and I bet that our anchors, Tawny Blowdry and Bob Vacuous, are all over it.

  55. 55.

    ranchandsyrup

    March 6, 2014 at 7:22 pm

    I wonder if Yakov Smirnoff is getting booked again these days due to Putin rearing his head over the world.

  56. 56.

    JaneE

    March 6, 2014 at 7:23 pm

    Is EMP supposed to be more scary than Nuke? Or is he trying to sound ignorant for his audience? EMP is a secondary effect of the nuclear explosion, which is what actually kills people. On second thought, maybe Cruz is saying that cell phones are more important to him than human beings.

  57. 57.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 6, 2014 at 7:26 pm

    as someone who was called a Decadent Fifth Columnist because I saw Gee Dumbya for what he was long before, during and in the aftermath of 9/11, I will always read Sullivan with a healthy degree of skepticism, but this is good, and Sully has (I believe) a deep readership among the Villagers:

    The buffoon from Arizona is one of the most frequent guests on cable news and on the Sunday morning talk shows. He was dead wrong about Iraq, Afghanistan and has never copped to it, clinging to his fantasy that his beloved “surge” made it all worthwhile. It didn’t, as the resilient sectarian warfare in that benighted country demonstrates day after day. He caved to Karl Rove on the torture question in 2006, leaving the CIA program in place. He picked a delusional maniac to be a vice-presidential candidate after close to no vetting whatsoever. He was jumping up and down trying to foment a war with Russia over Georgia in 2008. […]
    A simple question: why does anyone still take him even faintly seriously? Why does David Gregory defer to him? Why does CNN have him on to discuss foreign affairs when he as demonstrated catastrophic judgment time and time again?

    I especially like that he name-checked the Coiffe

  58. 58.

    Anne Laurie

    March 6, 2014 at 7:31 pm

    @Violet:

    In the 50′s and 60′s and maybe into the 70′s kids had drills about where they’d hide if there was a nuclear attack. Under the desks, of course. That would be safe!

    In my third-grade class (early 1960s), Sister Augustine told us that we didn’t have to worry about duck & cover drills, because we were in the Bronx and wouldn’t even see the massive flashes that reduced the whole greater metropolitan NYC area to glass.

    As long as we’d been to confession recently, of course. In those back-end-Boomer assembly-line-education days, we had our First Communions in second grade and were confirmed (ergo, ‘adult’ for religious purposes) in third grade. Knowing that we’d go straight to Heaven was better than duck’n’cover for protection, according to the Dominican sisters!

  59. 59.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 6, 2014 at 7:31 pm

    Elmer Gantry, “… wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.”

    Whenever I see that quote, I think that Peggy Noonan has a book-like product (hat tip to Pierce or Tbogg, can’t remember which) called “A Heart, A Cross, and a Flag”. I don’t know if Lewis foresaw the mewling, maudlin sentimentality that would envelope the American Right.,

  60. 60.

    Violet

    March 6, 2014 at 7:33 pm

    @MomSense:

    I remember those drills and I remember the day I found out about mutually assured destruction. I was so mad at my parents that they were talking so casually about something as insane as nuclear war.I remember those drills and I remember the day I found out about mutually assured destruction. I was so mad at my parents that they were talking so casually about something as insane as nuclear war.

    I remember having a similar sort of experience. That people could be talking so casually about it was what got to me.

  61. 61.

    Tracy Ratcliff

    March 6, 2014 at 7:37 pm

    @JaneE: The idea is that a single large bomb detonated at high altitude could create EMP that would propagate for thousands of miles (see the novel “Warday”). I’m betting current simulations show that it wouldn’t work like that, leaving the field open for the grifters.

  62. 62.

    WereBear

    March 6, 2014 at 7:39 pm

    I too, got in trouble during nuclear drills. I informed some of my fellow third graders that it didn’t matter, we’d be killed anyway.

    Some of them got very upset and I realized not everyone was a realist.

  63. 63.

    Bill Arnold

    March 6, 2014 at 7:40 pm

    @Tracy Ratcliff:

    leaving the field open for the grifters.

    Ah. The EMP comment was marketing?

  64. 64.

    NotMax

    March 6, 2014 at 7:40 pm

    @Anne Laurie

    First you get down on your knees
    Fiddle with your rosaries
    Bow your head with great respect
    And genuflect, genuflect, genuflect

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist

    As for Afghanistan, McCain must have a sad that the response from ‘our side’ is no longer to deny outright lethal snafus.

  65. 65.

    Anne Laurie

    March 6, 2014 at 7:40 pm

    @dedc79: No, that’s a great response from Grimes. She’s being the Competent Grown-Up, telling Little Mitch that he’s not adult enough to handle a powerful tool,and should go back to waving sticks and making pew-pwe-pew noises like the other six-year-olds.

  66. 66.

    MomSense

    March 6, 2014 at 7:42 pm

    Women of Soul performing tonight at the White House and Patti LaBelle just gave the President and First Lady the respect they should get from all of us!!
    whitehouse.gov is live streaming.

    Nice palette cleanser after this CPAC crap.

  67. 67.

    raven

    March 6, 2014 at 7:42 pm

    @NotMax:

    Drink the wine
    and chew the wafer. . .

  68. 68.

    MaryRC

    March 6, 2014 at 7:43 pm

    Have you seen this?

    Paul Ryan tells an anecdote about a little kid who doesn’t want a free school lunch — he wants to bring his lunch to school in a brown paper bag because it shows that someone cares about him.

    The anecdote is not only stolen from a book, it’s completely twisted and distorted.

    So I guess billmon’s tweet was wrong. Politics can get more pathetic than an old man waving a gun.

  69. 69.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 6, 2014 at 7:44 pm

    @raven: You can make any move you want if
    you get approval from the Pontiff
    Ave Maria
    Gee, it’s good to see ya!

  70. 70.

    Litlebritdiftrnt

    March 6, 2014 at 7:46 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    Sorry. Remember it like it was yesterday. If it makes you feel better the first thing the IC nurse did when they declared him was go and make us a nice pot of tea. That’s what they do in England. Tea solves everything.

  71. 71.

    Thoughtful David

    March 6, 2014 at 7:50 pm

    @Bubblegum Tate: They’ve always been all about installing their own version of sharia. It’s nothing new. Warning about sharia was the anomaly. But only because they never thought about it or knew what it was before.

  72. 72.

    Bill D.

    March 6, 2014 at 7:51 pm

    @Pogonip: Insurance won’t cover “acts of war”, period.

  73. 73.

    Origuy

    March 6, 2014 at 7:52 pm

    @ranchandsyrup: Yakov Smirnoff has his own theater in Branson, Missouri. Probably telling the same jokes he told in the 70s.

  74. 74.

    Roger Moore

    March 6, 2014 at 7:56 pm

    @Calouste:

    Another thing gundamentalists “overlook” is that there are actually slightly more non-gun murders per 100,000 in the US than there are in the UK.

    When you bring that up, you’ll get to see their racist side come out. The explanation may be rude or polite, but they’ll blame it all on violent minorities; if you look at the murder rate among middle class whites, it’s really low.

  75. 75.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 6, 2014 at 7:56 pm

    @NotMax:

    Drink the wine and chew the wafer
    Two, four, six, eight time to transubstantiate!

  76. 76.

    Roger Moore

    March 6, 2014 at 8:03 pm

    @Litlebritdiftrnt:

    Tea solves everything.

    Even Sheldon Cooper knows to offer someone a hot beverage when they’re upset.

  77. 77.

    PurpleGirl

    March 6, 2014 at 8:06 pm

    @MomSense: Thank you, the food bank and the school for being compassionate and wanting to help the students over the weekend. A can of pineapple may not seem to be much, but to that student it was Big Fucking Deal. It probably also made his parents happy to be able to serve him something he likes that they usually can’t afford.

  78. 78.

    The Ancient Randonneur

    March 6, 2014 at 8:07 pm

    A real man would be bare chested and on a horse. Come on Mitch, grow a pair.

  79. 79.

    Baud

    March 6, 2014 at 8:10 pm

    CPAC — The other “C” is for crazy. (so is the first “C”)

  80. 80.

    PurpleGirl

    March 6, 2014 at 8:10 pm

    @Violet: Of course it was safe… they taught you how to fold yourself up under the desk, hold one arm across your back neck and the other arm across your head close to your eyes.

    /sarcasm

  81. 81.

    Roger Moore

    March 6, 2014 at 8:11 pm

    @The Ancient Randonneur:
    I’m not sure if the Geneva Convention would allow that; it certainly sounds like inhumane and degrading treatment to viewers.

  82. 82.

    Suffern ACE

    March 6, 2014 at 8:12 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: yeah. I believe he wanted to send in marines to support Mubarak, dispersing protesters in support of a sick, octogenarian dictator.

  83. 83.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 6, 2014 at 8:12 pm

    @WereBear:

    One of the truisms about nuclear war that, fortunately, has never been tested, is that the survivors of a nuclear attack would envy the dead.

  84. 84.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 6, 2014 at 8:13 pm

    @Roger Moore:

    The Geneva Conventions are, in the words of the Dark Lord, “quaint.”

    Time to move on to newer, fresher atrocities in the name of Reagan.

  85. 85.

    JPL

    March 6, 2014 at 8:15 pm

    OT As a person who owned two goldens, one of which had 11 puppies, I might buy a chevy
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3t6bLugtJkQ

  86. 86.

    Kay

    March 6, 2014 at 8:15 pm

    @MaryRC:

    President Harry S. Truman signed the National School Lunch Act on June 4, 1946. Though school foodservice began long before 1946, the Act authorized the National School Lunch Program (NSLP). The legislation came in response to claims that many American men had been rejected for World War II military service because of diet-related health problems. The federally assisted meal program was established as “a measure of national security, to safeguard the health and well-being of the Nation’s children and to encourage the domestic consumption of nutritious agricultural commodities.”

    Paul Ryan was born in 1970. He’s nostalgic for this imaginary country that never was because he was born well after we addressed basic poverty needs. He’s been comfortably living in a house someone else built, and so he’s free to idly muse about tearing it down. He doesn’t even know what he wants to return to.

  87. 87.

    Elmo

    March 6, 2014 at 8:17 pm

    @Litlebritdiftrnt:

    I know exactly how you feel. My Dad died the morning of Dec 14, 2012 – the day of Sandy Hook.

    It was also my birthday.

  88. 88.

    Roger Moore

    March 6, 2014 at 8:25 pm

    @Kay:
    I don’t know if Ryan is authentically nostalgic for imaginary pure America or if he’s just taking advantage of other people who are. And he isn’t idly musing about tearing down the house he lives in; he’s actively planning to tear down a house that other people live in because he wants to do something with the land it’s on.

  89. 89.

    PurpleGirl

    March 6, 2014 at 8:26 pm

    @Anne Laurie: Growing up in Astoria, I was hoping that I was close enough to the Empire State Building to melted in a millesecond, being sure that the Empire State Building was bound to be a target. Alternate choices were the power generating plants and LaGuardia Airport because of their proximity to where I lived.

  90. 90.

    shelly

    March 6, 2014 at 8:29 pm

    According to Newsmax, looks like Cruz is channeling his inner Reagan. Morning in America, y’all!

  91. 91.

    mclaren

    March 6, 2014 at 8:31 pm

    Important article over at tomdispatch:

    The Pentagon’s phony budget war: Or How the U.S. Military Avoided Budget Cuts, Lied About Doing So, Then Asked for Billions More , by Mattea Kramer, 6 March 2014.

    Washington is pushing the panic button, claiming austerity is hollowing out our armed forces and our national security is at risk. That was the message Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel delivered last week when he announced that the Army would shrink to levels not seen since before World War II. Headlines about this crisis followed in papers like the New York Times and members of Congress issued statements swearing that they would never allow our security to be held hostage to the budget-cutting process.

    Yet a careful look at budget figures for the U.S. military — a bureaucratic juggernaut accounting for 57% of the federal discretionary budget and nearly 40% of all military spending on this planet — shows that such claims have been largely fictional. Despite cries of doom since the across-the-board cuts known as sequestration surfaced in Washington in 2011, the Pentagon has seen few actual reductions, and there is no indication that will change any time soon.

    This piece of potentially explosive news has, however, gone missing in action — and the “news” that replaced it could prove to be one of the great bait-and-switch stories of our time.

  92. 92.

    Kay

    March 6, 2014 at 8:42 pm

    @Roger Moore:

    he’s actively planning to tear down a house that other people live in because he wants to do something with the land it’s on.

    I used to joke that they think the country began with the election of Ronald Reagan and I swear, there’s truth to it. They seem to think we did all these things for no reason. I don’t know, can a country survive where each new generation of conservatives has to start at 1911, and we go back over it with them? “Well, old people couldn’t work anymore, so we set up this program..”

    I don’t think we have time for this :)

  93. 93.

    Roger Moore

    March 6, 2014 at 8:49 pm

    @Kay:

    They seem to think we did all these things for no reason.

    Some of them, perhaps, but a lot of them know the reason and just don’t care. They want what they want, and they don’t care who gets hurt in the process of them getting it.

  94. 94.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 6, 2014 at 8:49 pm

    @GxB:

    Let’s see: morticians, toxic dump remediators, cancer specialists, lawyers, think tank spin doctors, media lackies, ALEC stooges, goons to keep the grunts from getting uppity… oh and let’s not forget – tons of lobbyists.

    And Methodists!

  95. 95.

    Chris

    March 6, 2014 at 8:53 pm

    @Kay:

    Paul Ryan was born in 1970. He’s nostalgic for this imaginary country that never was because he was born well after we addressed basic poverty needs.

    Ding ding.

    Wingnuts love to talk about how many student radicals (yeah, all three of them) are from well off families, bankers and lawyers’ kids whose parents are where they are and can afford to send them to college only because of the capitalist economy they want to tear down.

    … WELP, in the same way, wingnuttiness seems to take root among the people who grew up in the shadow of the New Deal and in the middle class that it largely created. They’ve been living in big government for so long they don’t even realize it’s there and haven’t the slightest idea how drastically the world would change if they got what they wanted, how many of the things they take for granted would go away.

  96. 96.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 6, 2014 at 8:53 pm

    @Anne Laurie:

    Knowing that we’d go straight to Heaven was better than duck’n’cover for protection, according to the Dominican sisters!

    It certainly wasn’t any worse.

  97. 97.

    Joel

    March 6, 2014 at 8:56 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: it was already there; wasn’t that the purpose of Elmer Gantry?

  98. 98.

    Enhanced Voting Techniques

    March 6, 2014 at 8:56 pm

    @Mark B.:

    An EMP isn’t going to kill tens of millions of people. It’s going to fry all of their electronic devices and destroy a lot of the power infrastructure, which may eventually result in a some deaths, but I doubt it will be anywhere near the tens of millions. Essential services should recover in a few days or weeks at most.

    Not to mention we did that to Serbia during the Kosovo thing in the ’90s and it didn’t result in mass death. Sounds like some Conservetards have been getting their facts from the latest Red Dawn movie.

  99. 99.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 6, 2014 at 9:00 pm

    @Enhanced Voting Techniques: It could wipe out their bitcoin stockpile. That would be worse than death.

  100. 100.

    Kay

    March 6, 2014 at 9:01 pm

    @Roger Moore:

    I’m a little mad at myself because I should have anticipated school lunches would follow food stamps. Of course it does.

    We have 50% free or reduced lunch in this bastion of rural conservatism. Half. Paul Ryan’s base.

  101. 101.

    celticdragonchick

    March 6, 2014 at 9:01 pm

    @shelly:

    Oh, if only that gun (musket?) had accidently gone off, causing McConnell to have a little accident. I guess God doesn’t love us enough.

    Looks like a flintlock rifle (You can tell right off by the shape of the stock and the fancy filigree work). Muskets are smoothbore weapons made for military use. I own a replica King’s 2nd Land Pattern “Brown Bess” musket that I use as a Rev War re-enactor. A real shame that a perfectly good period weapon was given to a jackass who will never, ever use it to hunt or any thing else.

  102. 102.

    Cervantes

    March 6, 2014 at 9:01 pm

    @Kay:

    I used to joke that they think the country began with the election of Ronald Reagan

    And Jimmy Carter was George III?

    Hmm …

  103. 103.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 6, 2014 at 9:06 pm

    @celticdragonchick: You can tell rifle from musket from that photo? I can’t see if the barrel is thick enough for rifling.

  104. 104.

    TriassicSands

    March 6, 2014 at 9:19 pm

    It seems like CPAC is happening every six months now. Has it really been a year already since the last gathering of lunatics?

  105. 105.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 6, 2014 at 9:21 pm

    @Joel: I meant to say, I never read the book. All I know is Mrs Partridge won an Oscar for it.

  106. 106.

    Roger Moore

    March 6, 2014 at 9:26 pm

    @celticdragonchick:
    I saw another picture of it, and I thought it was a percussion cap model rather than a flintlock. The barrel also looks a bit short for a Revolutionary War weapon, so I would guess that it’s a Civil War era rifled musket. There are probably a lot of those still around, and I think there are replicas made for renactors. Giving a Confederate rifle would also go along with the general Republican modus operandi.

  107. 107.

    Kay

    March 6, 2014 at 9:33 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Several former leaders of the once-high-flying law firm Dewey & LeBoeuf apparently violated a cardinal rule that lawyers always tell their clients: Don’t put anything incriminating into an email.
    Yet four men, who were charged by New York prosecutors on Thursday with orchestrating a nearly four-year scheme to manipulate the firm’s books to keep it afloat during the financial crisis, talked openly in emails about “fake income,” “accounting tricks” and their ability to fool the firm’s “clueless auditor,” the prosecutors said.
    The messages were included in a 106-count indictment against Steven Davis, Dewey’s former chairman; Stephen DiCarmine, the firm’s executive director; Joel Sanders, the chief financial officer; and Zachary Warren, a client relations manager. They were charged with larceny and securities fraud. One of the men even used the phrase “cooking the books” to describe what they were doing to mislead the firm’s lenders and creditors in setting the stage for a $150 million debt offering that was supposed to solve the firm’s financial woes, according to the messages.

    Can you imagine the prosecutorial joy when they read those emails?

  108. 108.

    Kay

    March 6, 2014 at 9:37 pm

    And it gets better!

    The authorities said the accounting scheme was laid out in a document called the “Master Plan.”

  109. 109.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 6, 2014 at 9:38 pm

    @Kay: Jesus. Can you imagine the defense attorneys’ consternation when those emails were disclosed?

  110. 110.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 6, 2014 at 9:40 pm

    @Kay: Oh dear.

  111. 111.

    Pogonip

    March 6, 2014 at 9:43 pm

    @Bill D.: Thanks for the tip. When I file the claim, I’ll tell ’em the Russkies pushed the button by mistake. There’s precedent. In the early ’60’s, a computer mistook the moon for a flight of Russian missiles; a colonel stopped the counterattack. Something similar happened on their side and, once again, an unsung hero saved the world.

  112. 112.

    Matt McIrvin

    March 6, 2014 at 9:52 pm

    @Violet: By the early 70s my second-grade teacher was telling us that they used to have nuclear-war drills, but no longer bothered because the bombs were powerful enough that there was no point.

    Fun, fun days!

  113. 113.

    Bill D.

    March 6, 2014 at 9:52 pm

    @Pogonip: You’re welcome. Of course, I’ll want a cut of the $0.00 you receive on your claim.

    BTW, there were a lot more false alarms and close calls that that. Read Command and Control by Eric Schlosser and you will wonder why we are all still alive.

  114. 114.

    Matt McIrvin

    March 6, 2014 at 9:54 pm

    …In fact, warheads in actual deployment have mostly gone down in yield since the 1950s, because more accurate targeting makes the gigantic multi-megaton H-bombs less useful. But at that point the numbers were still escalating.

  115. 115.

    Jeffro

    March 6, 2014 at 10:00 pm

    @Chris: Just say “Tea Party Republicans” every time, that works. Doesn’t even matter if the listener thinks it’s an offshoot of the Republican party or how the GOP now refers to itself as a whole, still gets the point across.

  116. 116.

    Jeffro

    March 6, 2014 at 10:02 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: Me too. Of COURSE the poor kids would like to have nice bagged lunches from their folks, but they don’t, and it’s not because their parents don’t love them, it’s because they. don’t. have. the. money. and/or time.

    Ryan makes me madder than almost any of them…

  117. 117.

    Jeffro

    March 6, 2014 at 10:04 pm

    @Roger Moore: Ryan was a kid/early teen during the Reagan years and internalized all of that crap permanently. That plus reading Atlas Shrugged twenty gazillion times has left him permanently skewed and empathy deficient.

  118. 118.

    Kay

    March 6, 2014 at 10:07 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    I read a long piece about the whole mess. They had set up this crazy cycle, where they were paying people more and more to come onboard because they were already in trouble. Once they set out on that course, they just didn’t know how to stop. The new(est) highly paid person was supposed to bring in enough to keep the thing afloat, but all of the new hires were almost IN on it, the game. They were just collecting the money and trying to figure out when they should bail, trying to time it so they got one more check before the whole thing went under. It was akin to trying to time when to dump a stock.

  119. 119.

    Mike in NC

    March 6, 2014 at 10:13 pm

    @TriassicSands: CPAC seems to meet every quarter, as far as I can tell. Wolverines!

  120. 120.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 6, 2014 at 10:16 pm

    @Kay: Ponzi scheme.

  121. 121.

    Mnemosyne

    March 6, 2014 at 10:17 pm

    @Jeffro:

    Ryan was a kid/early teen during the Reagan years and internalized all of that crap permanently.

    No excuse. I was a kid/early teen during the Reagan years. I even grew up within 100 miles of where Ryan did. And yet I was smart enough to realize that Reagan was full of shit.

  122. 122.

    Kay

    March 6, 2014 at 10:18 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Too, I should say, I read the piece about six months ago and it was about hubris and greed and poor management and the financial crash and getting into debt.

    It didn’t have anything in there about fraud and larceny and a 100+ count indictment.

    None that I RECALL. At this TIME :)

  123. 123.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 6, 2014 at 10:21 pm

    @Kay: Can you find a link to the article? I would be interested in reading it.

  124. 124.

    PurpleGirl

    March 6, 2014 at 10:31 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: I worked for the firm when it was still LeBouef, Lamb, Libbey and McCray (or the nickname — The Butchers). I was there when Donald Green came on board as Managing Partner and some of the ill-planned and expensive growth started. Then they merged with Dewey-Ballantine and it went really haywire.

  125. 125.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 6, 2014 at 10:37 pm

    @PurpleGirl: You aren’t still there, right? The BigLaw mergers were probably dumb as hell – in retrospect.

  126. 126.

    Ian

    March 6, 2014 at 10:38 pm

    @Chris:
    You mean the guys who dressed up like Native Americans and robbed a ship? Who refused to take responsibility for it? It was anti-government vandalism committed by revolutionary 1%ers pissed at the British authorities for (guess what?) taxes.

    The dudes were criminals, not heros. They are a perfect image for the far right, as long as we actually remember what happened instead of pretending it was some great wolverine strike for freedom.

  127. 127.

    Suffern ACE

    March 6, 2014 at 10:42 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: I don’t think anyone is there now, or will be much longer.

    I read these stories and look for the auditor, working as I do in that industry. Pshew. Not us, not us.

  128. 128.

    PurpleGirl

    March 6, 2014 at 10:48 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: No, they let me go in 1992 as they began losing clients in certain departments. I was in Public Utilities and worked specifically in electric companies, contracts and rate filings.

    I have no idea where they could have thought they could pay back loans in the hundreds of millions of dollars. The client base hadn’t recovered from the losses of the early 90s.

    ETA: I know they thought that the merger would bring in new clients but it never really happened as they thought it would.

  129. 129.

    karen

    March 6, 2014 at 11:35 pm

    What’s next? Get rid of public school?

    No wait. Don’t answer that, I already know.

  130. 130.

    gian

    March 7, 2014 at 12:09 am

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    hasn’t it created a whole lot of new law about conflicts?
    and isolating parts of megafirms from each other?

    couldn’t anyone who remembered that conflicts can be a problem for lawyers have seen that train coming down the tracks?

    I was a bad idea at the time, I’m sure it had it’s cost cutting synergies and opportunities to leverage newly acquired expertise in some sort of corporate speak.
    but if you have to “wall off” parts of your megafirm from each other to avoid conflicts, what’s the point of being a megafirm?

  131. 131.

    fidelio

    March 7, 2014 at 9:13 am

    @Kay: (and others)

    There was a post at Lawyers, Guns and Money a while back about one of the survivors of that mess and his current financial problems, part of which result from the bankruptcy discharge payments.

  132. 132.

    Cervantes

    March 7, 2014 at 10:59 am

    @PurpleGirl:

    I worked for the firm when it was still LeBouef, Lamb, Libbey and McCray (or the nickname — The Butchers). I was there when Donald Green came on board as Managing Partner and some of the ill-planned and expensive growth started. Then they merged with Dewey-Ballantine and it went really haywire.

    My word. I bet you have stories.

  133. 133.

    Central Planning

    March 7, 2014 at 11:37 am

    No one shot McConnell? Did people feel safe with him brandishing a gun because he’s white?

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