• Menu
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Before Header

  • About Us
  • Lexicon
  • Contact Us
  • Our Store
  • ↑
  • ↓
  • ←
  • →

Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

The media handbook says “controversial” is the most negative description that can be used for a Republican.

Every one of the “Roberts Six” lied to get on the court.

Nikki Haley, who can’t acknowledge ‘slavery’, is a pathetic shill.

Meanwhile over at truth Social, the former president is busy confessing to crimes.

There is one struggling party in US right now, and it’s not the Democrats.

An unpunished coup is a training exercise.

Republicans are radicals, not conservatives.

Republicans don’t lie to be believed, they lie to be repeated.

A sufficient plurality of insane, greedy people can tank any democratic system ever devised, apparently.

We know you aren’t a Democrat but since you seem confused let me help you.

There is no compromise when it comes to body autonomy. You either have it or you don’t.

Since when do we limit our critiques to things we could do better ourselves?

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

Ah, the different things are different argument.

“Cheese and Kraken paired together for the appetizer trial.”

Prediction: the gop will rethink its strategy of boycotting future committees.

Whoever he was, that guy was nuts.

This isn’t Democrats spending madly. This is government catching up.

Peak wingnut was a lie.

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

A democracy can’t function when people can’t distinguish facts from lies.

The arc of history bends toward the same old fuckery.

Russia bombs Ukraine’s maternity hospitals; Republicans in the House can’t sort out supporting Ukraine.

“Everybody’s entitled to be an idiot.”

Mobile Menu

  • Four Directions Montana
  • Donate with Venmo, Zelle & PayPal
  • Site Feedback
  • War in Ukraine
  • Submit Photos to On the Road
  • Politics
  • On The Road
  • Open Threads
  • Topics
  • COVID-19 Coronavirus
  • Authors
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Lexicon
  • Our Store
  • Politics
  • Open Threads
  • 2024 Elections
  • Garden Chats
  • On The Road
  • Targeted Fundraising!
You are here: Home / Open Threads / Open Sports Thread: Free(dum) Agencery!

Open Sports Thread: Free(dum) Agencery!

by Anne Laurie|  March 8, 201410:18 pm| 48 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads, Sports

FacebookTweetEmail

My new favorite SB Nation blogger, PFT Commenter (parodist, we hope), Explains It All for us:

… What is Free Agency?

Free Agency is when a player and his agent love each other very much, and they get together to try and break the hearts of all the inocent little kids and honest 40 year-old autograph collecting males who bought their jerseys. Basically the players got together and said “we need to find a way to quit and still get paid” and presto! Free Agency was born.

When a player decides that hes had enough of a certain fanbase literally paying his salary, he gets to test the free agent waters. Sometimes they strike out but sometimes they can convince Dan Snyder to give you $100 million dollars to do absolutley nothing…

What’s a Franchise Tag?

Its when a player gets so mad at his own team on account of they want to pay him the average of the most overpaid players at his position. They become literaly the only person on Earth who doesnt want to get paid more then $8 million a year to play football (a GAME) for a living. Heck, Id do it.

PFT Commenter Innovation Station:

I think that if players get a franchise tag they should have to get literaly tagged like a turtle on a nature show on there ears or through there necks for the duration of there tag year- you cant tell me that wouldnt be the coolest. It would help you identify players who return to the breeding grounds of free ageny over and over and would educate fans on the migration patterns of these “ME Agents.” Most NFL fans think that this is what actually happens but it actually isnt…

***********
So, what sporting or other events are on the schedule for this evening?

FacebookTweetEmail
Previous Post: « Putin
Next Post: An Urgent Request »

Reader Interactions

48Comments

  1. 1.

    raven

    March 8, 2014 at 10:20 pm

    Illinois Iowa. Tight game and I’m dying.

  2. 2.

    raven

    March 8, 2014 at 10:22 pm

    And some ACC game.

  3. 3.

    The Dangerman

    March 8, 2014 at 10:23 pm

    Clippers have won 6 in a row; Atlanta has dropped 13 of 14 and I think they are playing a back to back. Is this still considered a sporting event?

  4. 4.

    ? Martin

    March 8, 2014 at 10:24 pm

    Paralympics are on. Never having seen them, we’re looking forward to something new.

  5. 5.

    Alison

    March 8, 2014 at 10:27 pm

    MLS opening day! Hoping for a win and a new goal-scoring record :)

  6. 6.

    billB

    March 8, 2014 at 10:38 pm

    AND the Oregon Ducks BBall team steal a final win from #3 Arizona.
    No where will you see a better example of smarmy elite ‘made’ players
    who know they are sliding right into the million dollar pro-contracts [ariz], and scrappy poor kids trying to escape a dim future as salesmen [ore] ! Shows to Go you, hustle and heart still count in this world!
    GOOOO DUUUCKS

  7. 7.

    raven

    March 8, 2014 at 10:39 pm

    GO ILLINI!!!!!!

  8. 8.

    NotMax

    March 8, 2014 at 10:41 pm

    Got the vehicle back from my mechanic after 3 weeks and looking forward to not begging a lift to the regular Saturday night gathering.

    In fairness, specifically told him “no rush” and to take all the time he needed to fit it in between his other customers as had no absolutely necessary need for it until the 10th of the month.

  9. 9.

    lamh36

    March 8, 2014 at 10:46 pm

    ICYMI, last Thursday, the White House taped their latest “In Performance” series for PBS. This series was titled “Women of Soul”. The performances included ole skool singers like Patti Labelle and Melissa Etheridge, but also newcomers like Jill Scott, Janelle Monae, Ariande Grande and last years winner from the Voice Tessanne Chin.

    The “headliner” was the Queen of Soul herself, Aretha Franklin. She performed twice, and her final song was Amazing Grace. There is a reason why she’s still the Queen, even with age, she still sounds damn good if you ask me…you can def hear the preachers daughter coming from her soul

    White House Series In Performance, Aretha Franklin – Amazing Grace

  10. 10.

    ranchandsyrup

    March 8, 2014 at 10:48 pm

    Wiped out from day drinking at the beach. Beautiful day today.

  11. 11.

    dr. bloor

    March 8, 2014 at 10:56 pm

    @billB:
    Yeah, when I look for the last beating heart of pure, amateur student-athletes in our society, I think University of Oregon.

  12. 12.

    raven

    March 8, 2014 at 10:58 pm

    @lamh36: Do you know about this?


    Long-Lost Video of R&B Stars at 1989 Inaugural Is to Air

    Held in a cavernous convention center, it featured blues and soul royalty like Bo Diddley, Willie Dixon, Sam Moore, Carla Thomas, Percy Sledge and Dr. John. Yet the highlight was when President George H. W. Bush — sworn in just a day before — hammed it up onstage with Lee Atwater, his campaign manager, both with guitars in their hands and smiles on their faces.

  13. 13.

    raven

    March 8, 2014 at 11:00 pm

    @efgoldman: WhatsaamattushwoshU.

  14. 14.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 8, 2014 at 11:04 pm

    @dr. bloor: Division III, god damn it. I keep saying it, but no one ever listens.

  15. 15.

    MikeJ

    March 8, 2014 at 11:07 pm

    @Alison:

    MLS opening day! Hoping for a win and a new goal-scoring record :)

    Major League Scabs?

    Glad Seattle won, sad there were no real officials.

  16. 16.

    raven

    March 8, 2014 at 11:07 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: The Whitewater Warhawks!

  17. 17.

    Joel

    March 8, 2014 at 11:08 pm

    It’s too bad the NBA gave the NCAA a lifeline by making the players spend a year as indentured servants.

  18. 18.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 8, 2014 at 11:12 pm

    @raven: LU Vikings, bitch.

    @efgoldman: Fuck that sell out D-II shit. D-III is the way to be.

  19. 19.

    cdmarine

    March 8, 2014 at 11:12 pm

    Free agency is a necessary, labor-friendly concept that prevents what amounts to involuntary servitude in professional sports leagues. The alternative may be more fun for fans and owners, but it’s unacceptable as far as labor practices go.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_baseball_in_the_United_States#Players_assert_themselves

  20. 20.

    Alison

    March 8, 2014 at 11:12 pm

    @MikeJ: I watch for the players, not the refs. *shrug*

  21. 21.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 8, 2014 at 11:15 pm

    @cdmarine: On the original topic, you are correct. More parochially, I hope Green Bay and Sam Shields come to a quick deal.

  22. 22.

    MikeJ

    March 8, 2014 at 11:17 pm

    @Alison: No game without a ref. I hate the idea of the league ripping off the workers.

  23. 23.

    piratedan

    March 8, 2014 at 11:18 pm

    @dr. bloor: still congrats to them on the win, it’s not to say that Arizona has a formidable squad, they do, but that’s the beauty of college hoops, sometimes David does kick Goliath’s patootie; although to cast Oregon in that role is a bit of a stretch. Will see if Oregon has any juice on a neutral floor because they may still need a win in the Pac12 tourney to feel safe.

    Hoping that Burnsie will try not to gloat too much over his Devils victory… but congrats to him and his alma mater as well.

  24. 24.

    piratedan

    March 8, 2014 at 11:18 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: they did for nearly 10m a season for a 4 year contract…. kinda pricey…

  25. 25.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 8, 2014 at 11:22 pm

    @piratedan: They signed him today? Awesome. Shields is worth the payday. GB has a lot of salary cap room and Shields was the #1 target to resign.

  26. 26.

    Alison

    March 8, 2014 at 11:25 pm

    @MikeJ: Okay, sure. Me too. But again – that’s the league, not the players. I watch the games to support them, many of whom sure as shit ain’t making European-level salaries or anything and are just doing what they love within a system that is, SURPRISE, kind of fucked sometimes.

  27. 27.

    Roger Moore

    March 8, 2014 at 11:42 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Division III, god damn it. I keep saying it, but no one ever listens.

    This. Of course, I’m somewhat biased, being a former Div III “athlete”. I still have my letter jacket as evidence.

  28. 28.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 8, 2014 at 11:42 pm

    @Roger Moore: Sport? Me: rugby.

  29. 29.

    Roger Moore

    March 8, 2014 at 11:48 pm

    @Alison:

    I watch for the players, not the refs.

    And good refs are a lot less likely to insert themselves into the game unnecessarily.

  30. 30.

    max

    March 8, 2014 at 11:48 pm

    They become literaly the only person on Earth who doesnt want to get paid more then $8 million a year to play football (a GAME) for a living.

    No. There are a number of other large burly men who would also like to get paid more. For destroying their brains and bodies.

    Heck, Id do it.

    Yeah, but the owners would only pay you to be a waterboy at best, and they’d pay you minimum wage (or less if they could get away with it), if that.

    So you back the owners, because the owners are such nice guys?

    max
    [‘If you could get paid more, I’d be happy for you, dude.’]

  31. 31.

    Roger Moore

    March 8, 2014 at 11:51 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:
    Swimming. Hurt my shoulder and haven’t gotten into a pool seriously since.

  32. 32.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 8, 2014 at 11:57 pm

    @Roger Moore: My dad swam ‘fly. He is weird. He also fenced. I did a bit of that as well. I have long arms relative to my height. Dad does not, yet he fenced. Like I said, he is weird.*

    *He is also awesome in a wide variety of ways that I do not want to go into right now.

  33. 33.

    butler

    March 9, 2014 at 12:05 am

    PFT Commenter (parodist, we hope)

    Just FYI, PFT Commenter is indeed a parody character. It was created by the writers at the NFL humor blog Kissing Suzy Kolber in order to mock the the mouth breathers who inhabit the comment sections under the news articles at ProFootballtalk.com, a demographic full of various forms of racism, sexism, anti-labor sentiment, etc.

  34. 34.

    butler

    March 9, 2014 at 12:07 am

    @max: Just so you know, the post quoted about is a parody of folks who hold these types of anti-labor views.

  35. 35.

    Fuzzy

    March 9, 2014 at 12:07 am

    @Roger Moore:Way back in the 60s we got a letter sweater. Big ugly wooly stinky sweaters.

  36. 36.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 9, 2014 at 12:07 am

    @efgoldman: No, I just really do admire the guy.

  37. 37.

    Roger Moore

    March 9, 2014 at 12:30 am

    @Fuzzy:
    By my day, the common apparel was a jacket with a wool body and leather sleeves, though there were also cheaper vinyl versions, at least when I was in High School. When I was in High School, they had different designs for boys (as I described) and girls (all wool with a zip apart hood that would lay flat on the back). There might have been one or two girls who got the boys’ style jacket, but a girl with the boy’s style was almost always showing off that her boyfriend was an athlete. At Caltech, there weren’t enough women athletes to justify a distinct style, so everyone got the leather sleeve style. I get the impression that the distinct styles have gone away and everyone wears the leather sleeved style now.

  38. 38.

    Roy G.

    March 9, 2014 at 12:39 am

    What’s a Franchise Tag?

    Its when a player gets so mad at his own team

    Really? Please tell us which players own their team.

  39. 39.

    ruemara

    March 9, 2014 at 12:40 am

    Halfway done with my video on the drought impact on wetlands and wildlife, just need some pickup shots. I decided to break, since my timer on the NAS shuts down at a set point so I don’t work all day on the weekend. And then I edited a project I did for a friend to teach her how to use cauliflower to make sushi and pizza. I am liking this software. Smooth, nice integration and the export wasn’t too bad. Of course, taking nearly 25 minutes to upload to youtubes is a pain. Can’t play WoW. I think I’ll go out early and hunt down the turkey or peahen flocks.

    um, sports. yay! Go some sort of team from somewhere!

  40. 40.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 9, 2014 at 12:44 am

    @ruemara:

    um, sports. yay! Go some sort of team from somewhere!

    That was kind of snotty and really unexpected coming from you.

  41. 41.

    Little Boots

    March 9, 2014 at 12:51 am

    oh, come on you goobers. somebody come upstairs and adopt a damn dog already.

  42. 42.

    ruemara

    March 9, 2014 at 12:57 am

    @Omnes Omnibus: You can perceive it as such, however since it was a sports thread, I felt it was good to cheer for a team, despite being a bit OT. But I do not actually follow any and so, cheered for all.

  43. 43.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 9, 2014 at 1:01 am

    @ruemara: In that case, my error and my apologies.

  44. 44.

    ruemara

    March 9, 2014 at 1:07 am

    @Omnes Omnibus: No worries, it’s the internet. Plus, I have a “created something nice” high and you have a good reputation.

  45. 45.

    ? Martin

    March 9, 2014 at 1:31 am

    Well, much credit to Dubya. Thanks to his Iraq adventure we have an abundance of amputees to represent us at the paralympics.

    Protecting American exceptionalism in all of its forms.

  46. 46.

    Suffern ACE

    March 9, 2014 at 3:33 am

    I would think owners and especially GMs and presidents of football operations would love free agency. It’s what gets them in the papers and makes them household names. Before free agency, who really cared what the GM did?

  47. 47.

    Cervantes

    March 9, 2014 at 7:41 am

    @? Martin: Er … Good grief?

  48. 48.

    billB

    March 9, 2014 at 11:43 pm

    You guys equate Oregon with the mega-schools because Uncle Phil built us some nice buildings, but we do not get the huge gifted athlete ‘made’ elite studs that go right to the pros. Both our Football and BBall teams are made up of scrappers that Alabama[ftbl] and Arizona[bball] laugh at. FYI I give you J. Lloyd, who at 5-10, no one in college hoops would take, and he has the heart of a warrior, he killed Arizona yest. with speed and cunning. Oregon has had success with innovative coaching and great heart from under-sized kids.

Comments are closed.

Primary Sidebar

Recent Comments

  • cain on Take the Fucking Win (Apr 15, 2024 @ 11:53am)
  • rikyrah on Take the Fucking Win (Apr 15, 2024 @ 11:53am)
  • Brachiator on Monday Morning Open Thread: The Tariff We Pay for Civilization (Apr 15, 2024 @ 11:53am)
  • Sure Lurkalot on Take the Fucking Win (Apr 15, 2024 @ 11:53am)
  • cain on Take the Fucking Win (Apr 15, 2024 @ 11:51am)

🎈Keep Balloon Juice Ad Free

Become a Balloon Juice Patreon
Donate with Venmo, Zelle or PayPal

Balloon Juice Posts

View by Topic
View by Author
View by Month & Year
View by Past Author

Balloon Juice Meetups!

All Meetups
Talk of Meetups – Meetup Planning
Proposed BJ meetups list from frosty

Fundraising 2023-24

Wis*Dems Supreme Court + SD-8
Virginia House Races
Four Directions – Montana
Worker Power AZ
Four Directions – Arizona
Four Directions – Nevada

Featuring

Medium Cool
Artists in Our Midst
Authors in Our Midst
Positive Climate News
War in Ukraine
Cole’s “Stories from the Road”
Classified Documents Primer

Calling All Jackals

Site Feedback
Nominate a Rotating Tag
Submit Photos to On the Road
Balloon Juice Mailing List Signup
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Links)
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Posts)

Fix Nyms with Apostrophes

Balloon Juice for Ukraine

Donate

Twitter / Spoutible

Balloon Juice (Spoutible)
WaterGirl (Spoutible)
TaMara (Spoutible)
John Cole
DougJ (aka NYT Pitchbot)
Betty Cracker
Tom Levenson
David Anderson
Major Major Major Major
ActualCitizensUnited

Political Action 2024

Postcard Writing Information

Balloon Juice for Four Directions AZ

Donate

Balloon Juice for Four Directions NV

Donate

Site Footer

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Comment Policy
  • Our Authors
  • Blogroll
  • Our Artists
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2024 Dev Balloon Juice · All Rights Reserved · Powered by BizBudding Inc

Share this ArticleLike this article? Email it to a friend!

Email sent!