So, the Nazi-banking-cuckoo-clock-making-yodellers-who-unleashed-Heidi-upon-the-world or the mendacious-head-butting-garlic-eaters-who-sleep-with-anything-that-isn’t-nailed-down?
Truly, an agonizing choice in every sense of the word.
France to win 2-1, but I am on team meteor strike for this one.
3.
mali muso
Allez les Bleus! Despite their colonial oppression of my hubby’s homeland of Mali, we’re gonna cheer for them. Fair number of West Africans playing on their team.
Isn’t France in the Middle East? I heard they hated us for our freedoms.
5.
Calouste
Important to win this match. Both teams look like to win their next match against Ecuador or Honduras, which means the winner gets to play whoever finishes behind Argentina in Group F, instead of the Argentinians themselves.
6.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
France pour la gloire!
France 6-0 Suisse
7.
daveNYC
@Frankensteinbeck: Pretty sure France just hates us regardless. But at least they’re honest, so I’ll take them over Switzerland. Plus I have money on France.
8.
mali muso
France 2-0 Suisse
Curious to see if Benzema has as good of a game as he did against Honduras.
9.
piratedan
the Swiss….over the cheese eating surrender monkeys
I am neutral, because I have lived for more than a decade in the Dreilaendereck (the German/French/Swiss border region between Basle and Strasbourg), but as there is so little opportunity for it, I’ll exclaim
Hopp, Schwiiz!
13.
KG
that looks like a nasty cut… hope the eye stayed in the socket
@scav: Mine was doing the same until just a few moments ago. Now it is bringing up this match. Maybe they were too busy watching the action to keep it updated. :)
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again):
Nobody knows how FIFA compiles the national-team rankings. The algorithm, if there is one, is a secret. The rankings seem to have sweet F.A.* to do with actual form.
I do. Now I know which CD is getting played on the way to work, too.
69.
Otmar
It was fun watching the first half on the Swiss TV.
70.
DC
Can someone explain to me why Valbuena wasn’t offside on the third goal? I understand he didn’t get the ball immediately, but it certainly benefited him in terms of getting in position to score.
71.
MattR
@? Martin: That is pretty good. Glad to see he has a sense of humor about it.
72.
SRW1
It appears that the injury and absence of Frank Ribery has had the same liberating effect on the French team as the injury and absence of Michael Ballack had on the German team in 2010.
From which it follows that France will make it to the semifinals, where they will loose to the eventual champion. Given the set-up of the bracket for the knock-out phase that must mean that Brazil will win it all.
I’m off to place a bet.
73.
mali muso
From the Guardian liveblog
News on the stricken Swiss defender Von Bergen. He’s in hospital, getting a broken cheekbone seen to. He also may have a problem with his eye socket, so they’re checking that out.
@MattR: Odds are he’s earning more from the EA ad than he would have earned had he been on the team. I know that’s not his motivation for being on the team, but it softens the blow a bit.
75.
MattR
@? Martin: Good point. And probably also softened a bit by the fact that the US doesn’t have any real chance to win the whole thing.
@SRW1: It doesn’t quite qualify, but that is approaching “Ewing Theory” territory.
76.
Amir Khalid
@SRW1:
It raises the possibility, doesn’t it, that some “talismanic” players actually do a team more harm than good by being the one the team is built around.
77.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
I like Landycakes. I really do. But the guy is getting older, and he’s lost a step. The national team had relied so much on him in the past to the point that the rest of the players (the keepers excluded) might have forgotten how to step up their own games when called upon to do so.
@MattR:
I didn’t know there was a name for it. And me not being a follower of the orange rubber ball, I thought at first you were referring to one of the fictional Texas clan of oil-business people.
80.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
I don’t think that guys like Gerrard and (in the past) Lampard needed to have Rooney pick up the slack. England tends to underachieve throughout the lineup. The US lineup tends to play as expected when they need to overachieve.
GOAL!
One more and I own this thread!
93.
Alex S.
I NEVER would have guessed that Switzerland loses by that much. Their coach won the Champions League with Bayern Munich and with Dortmund. I never thought I’d see one of his teams collapse so completely.
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again): I do too, and I don’t disagree with the decision. You always have to balance bringing experience along and giving new guys the opportunity to step up. Seemed like a good year for the latter.
Meh. Until he gets his Constantinoplian comeback, I can give him no credit nor cast on him any blame.
112.
scav
@Amir Khalid: You’re doing a good job — it’s a big job though. oooohh ceci m’amuse.
113.
Amir Khalid
@mali muso:
If Switzerland equalise from five goals down this late n the match it will be better than the Miracle of Istanbul.
ETA: Should I, or shouldn’t I? Decisions, decisions …
114.
scav
And, a propos of nothing, I like the photo of Moussa Sissoko post goal at the Guard Liveblog.
115.
mali muso
@Amir Khalid: Alas, it was not to be. L’homme propose, Dieu dispose.
116.
Morzer
90 min +1: A stat. The number of you who have emailed in with the “Swiss defence like Swiss cheese – full of holes” gag: 897. But it’s a good gag. I’m not knocking it.
117.
Ronnie Pudding
@Cain: Disagree. Plenty of quality goals. Lots of one touch passing and shooting, running on to the ball.
You can always put up a billboard with Tiki-Taka smiling at the world and asking “Miss Me Yet?”
119.
Burnspbesq
Une grosse boîte de cri-cul des Bleus.
120.
mali muso
Time to pack up and head home. Thanks for being fun company. First time commenting here at BJ despite lurking for 2+ years. And all it took was the lure of the World Cup open threads. :)
121.
scav
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again): and there was that nasty nasty ref right at the end that had it in for you too. There’s a moral, direction and magnitude prize for you somewhere in your afterlife.
122.
Chris
Fuck, that was glorious. Allez les Bleus, indeed.
123.
Caravelle
I missed the match but I’ve been hanging out in a French restaurant for the last two hours, with a TV turned on to the sports channel. They showed the Honduras – Ecuador match, and since that ended they’ve been talking about yesterday’s France-Switzerland match. non. stop.
The phrase “La France est une grande puissance” was uttered.
It’s going to be One Of Those Things, I feel it.
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Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
France, 3-1.
Morzer
So, the Nazi-banking-cuckoo-clock-making-yodellers-who-unleashed-Heidi-upon-the-world or the mendacious-head-butting-garlic-eaters-who-sleep-with-anything-that-isn’t-nailed-down?
Truly, an agonizing choice in every sense of the word.
France to win 2-1, but I am on team meteor strike for this one.
mali muso
Allez les Bleus! Despite their colonial oppression of my hubby’s homeland of Mali, we’re gonna cheer for them. Fair number of West Africans playing on their team.
Frankensteinbeck
Isn’t France in the Middle East? I heard they hated us for our freedoms.
Calouste
Important to win this match. Both teams look like to win their next match against Ecuador or Honduras, which means the winner gets to play whoever finishes behind Argentina in Group F, instead of the Argentinians themselves.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
France pour la gloire!
France 6-0 Suisse
daveNYC
@Frankensteinbeck: Pretty sure France just hates us regardless. But at least they’re honest, so I’ll take them over Switzerland. Plus I have money on France.
mali muso
France 2-0 Suisse
Curious to see if Benzema has as good of a game as he did against Honduras.
piratedan
the Swiss….over the cheese eating surrender monkeys
Morzer
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again):
No nation whose leader conducts his romantic affairs from a moped deserves to score six goals. Even against the Swiss.
scav
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again): I don’t know if the Siran Restaubar could take it, but why not? Allez!
SRW1
I am neutral, because I have lived for more than a decade in the Dreilaendereck (the German/French/Swiss border region between Basle and Strasbourg), but as there is so little opportunity for it, I’ll exclaim
Hopp, Schwiiz!
KG
that looks like a nasty cut… hope the eye stayed in the socket
Calouste
@SRW1:
If you’re neutral in this match, aren’t you really supporting the Swiss anyway?
mali muso
@Calouste: Well played, sir, well played.
Morzer
@Calouste:
That is a fine, gnomic utterance.
Someguy
The bad cheese eating heavily armed pacifist baboons over the good cheese eating surrender monkeys.
SRW1
@Calouste:
I am with the Swedes all the way.
mali muso
Et voila!
SRW1
And here we go! Arsenal scores over ex-Arsenal.
raven
Whoa, !!!!! A duece
mali muso
omg, wow la France!!! Two goals in two minutes!
SRW1
Des chansch jo nit glaubbe!
MattR
Wow. Glad I turned the TV on 3 minutes ago
MattR
Anyone seen this McDonald’s World Cup commercial? Made me chuckle the first time I saw it.
scav
I may have heard the Restaubar from here.
Valdivia
At leafy poor Honduras is looking less incapable now that the French are doing their thing to the Swiss.
? Martin
I wonder how much of the French victory will be chalked up to those tragic haircuts?
Amir Khalid
Okay, that’s it. France is going to thrash Switzerland. Les Bleus are doing rather better than in 2010, it would seem.
raven
They look like swiss cheese!
Morzer
@raven:
They’ve always been a bit holier than thou.
SRW1
@? Martin:
You mean the Swiss guy with the bun?
Valdivia
Oy. Autocorrect. Not leafy. At least.
mali muso
huh, so apparently (according to the Guardian liveblog) there were only 13 seconds between those goals.
Morzer
@mali muso:
Hmm loss of time – must be an alien abduction in progress. Which would certainly explain where the Swiss defense vanished to.
mali muso
wait, what just happened? Goal or no goal?
Ronnie Pudding
This venue has seen 5-1 and 4-0, now we’re on our way to something similar. Something about Bahia.
scav
@mali muso: Couldn’t even liveblog it fast enough to keep up. Might remind people to watch – let alone play – to the very end. Hou-la.
mali muso
@scav: lol, fair enough.
Amir Khalid
If France get a third goal before halftime, the match is over unless Switzerland manage a Miracle-of-Istanbul level comeback.
SRW1
That was …. stupid.
scav
seems to have livened up all round certainly.
mali muso
Arg! Waste of a penalty kick.
SRW1
Well, hitting the bar twice is also impressive.
Morzer
I am starting to think that Amir Khalid is controlling the direction of this game.
@Amir Khalid:
Amir Khalid
@Morzer:
I have the powers of a god! All bow down before me!
raven
@Amir Khalid: ennie meenie chili beenie, the spirits are about to speak!
Morzer
@Amir Khalid:
So, about that winning lottery number….
raven
Well, it looks like I’m safe to make that Friday pm run to Trader Joe’s!
mali muso
Vive la France! There we go…
SRW1
Didn’t somebody upthread say something about Swiss cheese?
raven
@Amir Khalid: Amir and the squirrel.
raven
@SRW1: Thank you, thank you very much. Can I get you anything from the Trader?
scav
N’importe quoi.
daveNYC
So yeah, I think France has been on ‘offense’ for maybe five minutes total and scored three goals.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
Half the way to la gloire.
Amir Khalid
In case anyone hasn’t been keeping u n current events, Switzerland are getting their asses kicked. That’s it, man: game over.
mali muso
@raven: Pick up some Swiss cheese while you’re there. You could make a meal of it, like France is making a meal of this game.
raven
How you say “Le Boose”?
scav
Speaking of weird and keeping up with history, Googledoodle’s still hung up reporting the final of Italy Costa Rica as best I can tell.
ETA: Now they’re caught up.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
@Amir Khalid:
FIFA’s sixth ranked team. HA!
mali muso
@scav: Mine was doing the same until just a few moments ago. Now it is bringing up this match. Maybe they were too busy watching the action to keep it updated. :)
SRW1
That goose is plucked.
Alex S.
Fromage beats Käse.
? Martin
Ok, that Landon Donovan EA Sports commercial is pretty funny.
Amir Khalid
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again):
Nobody knows how FIFA compiles the national-team rankings. The algorithm, if there is one, is a secret. The rankings seem to have sweet F.A.* to do with actual form.
*See what I did there?
scav
@Amir Khalid: So it’s not just in Petanche?
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
@Amir Khalid:
I do. Now I know which CD is getting played on the way to work, too.
Otmar
It was fun watching the first half on the Swiss TV.
DC
Can someone explain to me why Valbuena wasn’t offside on the third goal? I understand he didn’t get the ball immediately, but it certainly benefited him in terms of getting in position to score.
MattR
@? Martin: That is pretty good. Glad to see he has a sense of humor about it.
SRW1
It appears that the injury and absence of Frank Ribery has had the same liberating effect on the French team as the injury and absence of Michael Ballack had on the German team in 2010.
From which it follows that France will make it to the semifinals, where they will loose to the eventual champion. Given the set-up of the bracket for the knock-out phase that must mean that Brazil will win it all.
I’m off to place a bet.
mali muso
From the Guardian liveblog
Ouch!
? Martin
@MattR: Odds are he’s earning more from the EA ad than he would have earned had he been on the team. I know that’s not his motivation for being on the team, but it softens the blow a bit.
MattR
@? Martin: Good point. And probably also softened a bit by the fact that the US doesn’t have any real chance to win the whole thing.
@SRW1: It doesn’t quite qualify, but that is approaching “Ewing Theory” territory.
Amir Khalid
@SRW1:
It raises the possibility, doesn’t it, that some “talismanic” players actually do a team more harm than good by being the one the team is built around.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
@? Martin:
I like Landycakes. I really do. But the guy is getting older, and he’s lost a step. The national team had relied so much on him in the past to the point that the rest of the players (the keepers excluded) might have forgotten how to step up their own games when called upon to do so.
mali muso
@Amir Khalid: Like Rooney for England?
Oh, and there goes Benzema!
Amir Khalid
@MattR:
I didn’t know there was a name for it. And me not being a follower of the orange rubber ball, I thought at first you were referring to one of the fictional Texas clan of oil-business people.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
GOAL!
Two to go. Make me look smart, boys.
scav
oooooooooo, late night tonight.
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again): My 3-1 guess is just a bit off.
Amir Khalid
@mali muso:
Yes, exactly like Rooney. And for Manchester United too, come to that.
Morzer
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again):
I am starting to wonder whether England fans should encourage David Cameron to become a moped-riding adulterer. It seems to work for the French.
mali muso
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again): 20+ minutes…anything could happen. Two more doesn’t seem out of the realm of possibility.
Morzer
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):
You’ve got the total number of goals right.
Well, so far, anyway.
UPDATED:
Or maybe not.
mali muso
aaaaannnnnddddd allons-y!
5-0
SRW1
@Amir Khalid:
Yes, and if we add poor Casillas and Gerrard the suggestion becomes even stronger.
Morbo
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again): Uhhhh…
scav
la la la
Morzer
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again):
I bet if the 6th goal goes in you’ll be screaming at the French not to score numero sept.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
@mali muso:
I don’t think that guys like Gerrard and (in the past) Lampard needed to have Rooney pick up the slack. England tends to underachieve throughout the lineup. The US lineup tends to play as expected when they need to overachieve.
GOAL!
One more and I own this thread!
Alex S.
I NEVER would have guessed that Switzerland loses by that much. Their coach won the Champions League with Bayern Munich and with Dortmund. I never thought I’d see one of his teams collapse so completely.
IM
Now the french are just cruel.
SRW1
@MattR:
You learn something new every day. Didn’t know there was a name for the phenomenon.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
@Morzer:
You are not incorrect.
Morzer
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again):
I blame the revealed deity Amir Khalid.
scav
seriously, structural tolerances of buildings will be tested.
mali muso
Woot! Sissoko scored that last goal. Yay for the Malian!!
? Martin
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again): I do too, and I don’t disagree with the decision. You always have to balance bringing experience along and giving new guys the opportunity to step up. Seemed like a good year for the latter.
Morzer
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again):
Hugo Lloris has betrayed you. Probably in collaboration with Obama.
SRW1
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again):
You jinxed it!
scav
Not going to argue with keeping the game going and interesting personally.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Kill me now!
daveNYC
Some guys on the French team need to revisit the concept behind being in the wall on a free kick.
scav
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again): Amir is a jealous deity. He needs to learn how to share.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
Goodbye, cruel world.
Cain
Man, that was a lame game. (if it is still going on, it’s still lame) It was like watching pinball. Ball bouncing off, no sense of ball handling. Meh.
Amir Khalid
@scav:
I just didn’t want the French to get too big-headed.
mali muso
Well, well. Switzerland waking up with 4 minutes left. Do they have four more goals in them?
At least they can feel a bit better to go out fighting.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
@scav:
Meh. Until he gets his Constantinoplian comeback, I can give him no credit nor cast on him any blame.
scav
@Amir Khalid: You’re doing a good job — it’s a big job though. oooohh ceci m’amuse.
Amir Khalid
@mali muso:
If Switzerland equalise from five goals down this late n the match it will be better than the Miracle of Istanbul.
ETA: Should I, or shouldn’t I? Decisions, decisions …
scav
And, a propos of nothing, I like the photo of Moussa Sissoko post goal at the Guard Liveblog.
mali muso
@Amir Khalid: Alas, it was not to be. L’homme propose, Dieu dispose.
Morzer
Ronnie Pudding
@Cain: Disagree. Plenty of quality goals. Lots of one touch passing and shooting, running on to the ball.
Morzer
@Cain:
You can always put up a billboard with Tiki-Taka smiling at the world and asking “Miss Me Yet?”
Burnspbesq
Une grosse boîte de cri-cul des Bleus.
mali muso
Time to pack up and head home. Thanks for being fun company. First time commenting here at BJ despite lurking for 2+ years. And all it took was the lure of the World Cup open threads. :)
scav
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again): and there was that nasty nasty ref right at the end that had it in for you too. There’s a moral, direction and magnitude prize for you somewhere in your afterlife.
Chris
Fuck, that was glorious. Allez les Bleus, indeed.
Caravelle
I missed the match but I’ve been hanging out in a French restaurant for the last two hours, with a TV turned on to the sports channel. They showed the Honduras – Ecuador match, and since that ended they’ve been talking about yesterday’s France-Switzerland match. non. stop.
The phrase “La France est une grande puissance” was uttered.
It’s going to be One Of Those Things, I feel it.