Will the Bosnians bounce back from their loss to Argentina? Will the Super Eagles bore us again?
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Come for the politics, stay for the snark.
Republicans: slavery is when you own me. freedom is when I own you.
They are lying in pursuit of an agenda.
We are builders in a constant struggle with destroyers. keep building.
Russia bombs Ukraine’s maternity hospitals; Republicans in the House can’t sort out supporting Ukraine.
T R E 4 5 O N
This has so much WTF written all over it that it is hard to comprehend.
I’d try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work.
Come on, media. you have one job. start doing it.
This year has been the longest three days of putin’s life.
Prediction: the gop will rethink its strategy of boycotting future committees.
They love authoritarianism, but only when they get to be the authoritarians.
Republicans want to make it harder to vote and easier for them to cheat.
I’d like to think you all would remain faithful to me if i ever tried to have some of you killed.
If ‘weird’ was the finish line, they ran through the tape and kept running.
Not so fun when the rabbit gets the gun, is it?
Fundamental belief of white supremacy: white people are presumed innocent, minorities are presumed guilty.
Let’s bury these fuckers at the polls 2 years from now.
When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.
New McCarthy, same old McCarthyism.
They were going to turn on one another at some point. It was inevitable.
The choice is between normal and crazy.
Well, whatever it is, it’s better than being a Republican.
Fear or fury? The choice is ours.
The lights are all blinking red.
gogol's wife
Go Bosnia rahrahrah
Ernest Pikeman
I choose sides based on who has better music.
Nigeria!
Alex S.
@Ernest Pikeman:
Nigeria has Fela Kuti. Easy decision.
scav
@Alex S.: I was wondering if he played Tango or whatever the other one that Ernest was originally going on about.
MikeJ
My uncle is a footballer with Nigeria. He has three goals he would like to get out of the country, but government paperwork has delayed it. If you would give me your bank account details, the goals will be deposited in your account and you may keep 20% as a fee.
Litlebritdifrnt
So my RWNJ radio host was ranting about a Daily Telegraph story the other day that said that ISIS had taken control of “Sadam Hussein’s Chemical Weapons stash”. Here’s my problem with that story, we all learned that he never had a chemical weapons stash to begin with, but the second part is that they are trying to claim that US troops spent ten years in total control of the country and a)if they found a chemical weapons stash we wouldn’t hear about it (Cheney for one would have been on every show every day yelling about it), and b) even if US troops HAD found a chemical weapons stash (see a above) they wouldn’t have made sure it was disposed of? Are they trying to claim in one story that a) there was a chemical weapons stash and b) US troops are so fucking incompetent that they didn’t dispose of it once it was found? Help me out here.
Morzer
@MikeJ:
I’ll have to ask you to leave your bank details with my dear friend, the widow of the late Nigerian finance minister.
MattR
I think this summary of US scenarios is correct
Win then anything = IN
Tie then win = IN
Tie then tie = IN
Tie then loss = in with Portgual/Ghana tie, possible with Portugal win (as long as combined GD in final games is not 4 or more, the US advances), possible if Ghana wins (US would need to lose to Germany by 1, Ghana would have to beat Portugal by 1 and the US would have to score more vs Portugal and Ghana than Ghana scored vs Portugal to advance)
Loss then win = IN
Loss then tie = Out with Portugal win, possible if Portugal/Ghana tie (if US loses by 1 to Portugal they advance, if they lose by 3+ they are out, if they lose by 2 the US advances if they have more goals in the loss to Germany than Portugal has while tying Ghana), possible if Ghana wins (US would need to lose to Portugal by 1, Ghana would have to beat Portugal by 1 and the US would have to score more vs Portugal and Ghana than Ghana scored vs Portugal to advance)
Loss then loss = OUT
Alex S.
@Litlebritdifrnt:
Haha, yeah, ISIS has found Saddam’s elusive weapons of mass destruction, let’s invade!
scav
@Litlebritdifrnt: Possibly a delay in shipment for the stash they once preemptively hid for the ceremonial find the easter-egg hunt of justification? Because they can’t be suggesting the Repub led holy troops were incompetent traitors, unlike the variably viewed troops we apparently have now. Being able to blame the USPS for shoddy performance would be a two-fer.
NotMax
Noted in passing:
Woman who discovered Kevlar dies at age 90.
⚽️ Martin
@Litlebritdifrnt:
They’re delusional grifters lying to the public in order to keep their jobs.
Violet
@Litlebritdifrnt: If ISIS found a bottle of ammonia under a sink in one of his former palaces wingnuts would claim that was his “chemical weapon’s stash”. See, they’re right! It’s a chemical and it was stashed!
As with most things in Planet Wingnut it’s not about facts–it’s about how those facts make you feel. If you feel scared and angry that ISIS found Saddam Hussein’s chemical weapons stash, then they’ve done their job. Doesn’t matter if it’s not true. Doesn’t matter if, when you look at it, it’s not even possible. What matters is that you’re scared and angry.
Morzer
@Violet:
“GOP denounces Obama as box of matches found in Saddam Hussein’s hiding place.”
Litlebritdifrnt
@Violet:
I know this may be obsolete but it really shows that these people do not think things through to their logical conclusion. In order for a stash to have existed for ISIS to take over it would mean that the entire US military is totally and utterly incompetent. For people who worship the troops (until they become disabled vets that is) it just does not make any sense.
NotMax
@Morzer
“ISIS seen carrying yellow cake from Tikrit bakery.”
raven
OK British lady on TV. If it is destiny it cannot be “controlled”.
MikeJ
Nigeria are wearing Seattle Sounders kit.
scav
@raven: Guard Liveblog guy is apparently being dragged kicking and screaming to cover this match. Keeps trying to run off and do data-entry, anything, to avoid it.
SRW1
Was there an invasion from Mars we weren’t informed about?
Morzer
@NotMax:
Lindsey Graham worried about sugar frosting found in Baghdad bakery.
scav
@SRW1: just who is on the pitch? Old-school Martians, I assume they’d try to sneak in using the Nigerian Kit as they’re usually green. Ice Warriors though, they could be the Bosnians.
WaterGirl
I don’t get all the symbolism in today’s google-thing again, but I have to say, I really like the dog!
Morzer
@WaterGirl:
Super Eagle (Nigeria) hovering over a dog(?) wearing the symbol of the Bosnia Herzegovina soccer team. Why a dog? Damned if I know, because apparently the BH team nickname is either The Golden Lilies or The Dragons.
UPDATE: That creature is apparently a… Bosnian Dog. Who knew?
UPDATE YE SECONDE: The Super Eagle looks more like a genetically modified penguin to me.
scav
@Morzer: Green or Super Eagles, yeah, obvious but the dog? As this is BJ, here’s the Tornjak but no link to futbal I can find.
Morzer
@scav:
That is indeed a Bosnian dog. I don’t see why they couldn’t have used a dragon, but perhaps the Welsh or the Tolkien Estate would have sued for something or other.
SRW1
I think Dzeko wa robbed.
Morzer
@SRW1:
He shouldn’t have written back to that Nigerian finance minister.
scav
@Morzer: What about Game of Thrones, don’t they have the wingy fiery things too? All Google’s Eagles have looked like slightly eroded Minecraft Penguins with different shirts.
WaterGirl
@Morzer: Thanks! I am officially rooting for the Bosnian dog.
Morzer
@scav:
Come to that, perhaps that Smaug bastard Eggs Cumberbundy might want to get in on the action.
SRW1
@Morzer:
Good one, made me laugh.
Morzer
@WaterGirl:
I am probably rooting for Nigeria, but not for any particular reason.
Funnily enough, the best soccer player I’ve ever encountered was an undergraduate from Nigeria named Chike. Absolutely amazing skills on the ball.
scav
@Morzer: Here you are then:
Bosnian Egg Soup v. Nigerian Egg Stew
Morzer
The genetically modified alien penguins strike! ONE NIL!!!
SRW1
And there it is.
What are the protests about?
Morzer
@scav:
Verily, Balloon-Juice is a repository of all knowledge.
And now I feel hungry.
Violet
Really like the vivid green.
Morzer
@SRW1:
Defender got turned inside out by the attacker, fell over hopefully and got no sympathy from the referee.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
One bad call against Bosnia and one against Herzegovina. Bad officiating. Bad.
Morzer
@Violet:
Could we call it absinthe green? It has a certain hallucinatory quality.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
@SRW1:
The Nigerian player (who got the assist) tried to play the ball around the Bosnian defender, shoved him in the back, then reached over and pulled him down to get to the ball.
jame
Where did they find these refs? Appalling calls, when they make them.
Violet
@Morzer: I can get on board with that.
@scav: Thanks for reminding me of The Guardian liveblog. I love their liveblogs. He really doesn’t sound like he wants to be covering this match. It is awfully late in the UK for a match to start. My English relatives are complaining about it.
Morzer
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again):
Both sides do it!
Morzer
@jame:
David Gregory is working a new gig along the touchline.
scav
@Violet: Downside of an international sport on a round planet.
Morzer
Dzeko seems to be missing the target by ever-greater margins.
burnspbesq
ESPN’s Rebecca Lowe knockoff is cute, but Lowe actually knows the game.
SRW1
@Morzer:
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again):
Interesting how differently one can see these things. I think the ref got it right in this case. Where he messed up, or actually his assistant did, was with his offside call that robbed Dzeko.
SRW1
@Morzer:
Dzeko must have misunderstood your comment as an instruction.
Tommy
Nigeria vs. Bosnia. I am 100% I’d never type that again. Got some far off nations on the field.
Violet
Guardian liveblog cracks me up:
scav
I’m liking the names in this game, and it’s not as though we’ve been in a dearth of good ones over the last week plus. Still, “… First he scoops a 20-yarder from Babatunde away. Then a cross comes to Odemwingie in the area. The ball rebounds off him but runs to Emenike. Six yards out, he’s brilliantly denied by Begovic’s legs …” above “Spahic is going to have nightmares about Emenike tonight”
And now a Tino-Sven Susic!?!
HumboldtBlue
Here Comes The Ball nails both earlier games, the Ghana witch doctor is pitch-perfect
SRW1
This is ever so slightly slipping away from B-H and given that they will go out if it remains like this, they appear not to find a way to step it up a gear.
Cassidy
I want some magic spray.
HumboldtBlue
@Cassidy: Everyone does. Stub your toe? Use magic spray. Catch your elbow the wrong way? Magic spray. Cancer? Magic spray. Compound fracture of the femur? Magic spray.
It does it all, and now it’s even new and improved to answer all your medical needs
Anoniminous
First chance I’ve had to watch a match and it’s Nigeria vs. Bosnia.
Whoopie
Corner Stone
@Anoniminous: You could’ve been caught on Arg v Iran.
90+ minutes of Iran’s defense. Sloppy ass passing by Arg.
SRW1
That was too anaemic by B-H.
Steeplejack
@SRW1:
They woke up too late. They were sleepwalking through most of the second half.
Anoniminous
He topped it. sheesh A solid kick would have tied it.
@Corner Stone:
Been a lot of those … or so I have heard.
Heliopause
It occurs to me that aside from my too-many-other complaints about the World Cup they really need to change the grouping and advancing format, which eliminates too many teams mathematically after only two games, which is stupid. How many eyeballs have they now lost in Spain and England, for instance? The advertisers paid good money for those eyeballs.
I suggest that in future they group into seven groupings of five teams. Everybody plays at least four games and at least three of them should be meaningful. Top two advance from each group plus two “wild card” teams. This way a team like Spain, which desperately needs the economic stimulus, will sell a few thousand more bottles of sangria before flying back home in shame.