From TPM:
Actor Robin Williams was in the early stages of Parkinson’s Disease at the time of his death, his wife said in a statement Thursday.
“Robin’s sobriety was intact and he was brave as he struggled with his own battles of depression, anxiety as well as early stages of Parkinson’s Disease, which he was not yet ready to share publicly,” William’s wife Susan Schneider said in a statement obtained by multiple news outlets…
For an artist whose work was based so much on total physical control, imagine how devastating that diagnosis was.
I would’ve preferred to use this clip (NSFW/trigger warning – violence) from The Fisher King, because it’s such a great vignette of Robin Williams at his finest. “Hey — I know a fabulous place, with great ambiance!”…
Thoughts from David Simon, of The Wire:
This is a grievous thing to say aloud, much less think, but I wish that the suicide of Robin Williams made less sense to me than it somehow does. I say that with very little real knowledge of the man, his inner being, or the whole of his life. I encountered him only once, twenty years ago, but the memory is distinct. I found Mr. Williams good-hearted, hilarious, talented, and remarkably, indescribably sad….
And from NYMag, Terry Gilliam talks about making The Fisher King:
“…The interesting thing about Robin in all of those scenes was that he always wanted to do another take. He felt he had even more anguish and pain to spill out of the character. And I had to really stop him. I had to say, ‘Robin, you’ve reached a point here, way beyond what we expected. We’ve got what we needed. Now you’re just hurting yourself.’…”
Finally, y’know, I would’ve liked to see Williams play Casey Stengel.
trollhattan
The Terry Gilliam comments are as devastating as they are revealing. Robin Williams left it all out there, no matter what or where the performance. Was off-grid for a week so I am trying to catch up (“why?” is a question I can’t answer) and this is more painful than I’m ready for.
Little Boots
you are a nice and decent person.
robin williams got on my last damn nerve sometimes, but this is just a sad story all around. and I loved fisher king.
SarahT
My Dad had Parkinson’s and it’s just a godawful, unbearable way to go. Add chronic, clinical depression ? I can’t even imagine.
Little Boots
@SarahT:
there are treatments, but the fact that somebody who had probably all the resources to treat, committed suicide, well, maybe we don’t exactly know what we’re doing yet.
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@Little Boots: It isn’t about resources or wealth. If he was fighting depression, the Parkinson’s may have been the last straw.
SarahT
@Little Boots: Sadly, not everyone is an acceptable candidate for many of the newer treatments (direct brain stimulation, etc.). And not everyone responds to the drugs. (Again) Sadly, patients like Michael J. Fox who respond well and continue to be able to live the lives they’ve known seem to be the exception, not the norm. Things may change, but who knows when ? My Dad’s standard “joke” every year from the time he was diagnosed: Q) “Dad, What do you want for Hannukah ?” A) “Stem cells”. End of rant. Sorry.
Little Boots
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):
that is true, but it does indicate, we just do not have cure. yet. maybe someday, but not yet.
Little Boots
@SarahT:
that is no rant. that is truly touching. you make great points.
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@SarahT: My ex-f-i-l has had Parkinson’s for about eight years and has responded very well to treatment – a little shake in his hands and that is it. Ex-f-i-l or not, he is a good guy and I am so happy the treatments work for him.
SarahT
@Little Boots: thanks – you are very kind
SarahT
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): So glad to hear that ! Every success against Parkinson’s is important.
drkrick
Perhaps doubly devastating because his art seems to have been a huge part of his coping strategy for everything else he was struggling with. Someone who superficially seemed very, very lucky in life but in reality was anything but.
Violet
@SarahT: Not a rant. And your dad’s joke made me laugh. Wryly. The father of one of my very good friends died last year after a long battle with Parkinson’s. Tough disease and yeah, treatments don’t work for everyone.
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): That’s so good to hear. I’m glad medical breakthroughs are helping some if not all.
SarahT
@Violet: Dad would have been pleased to get a laugh !
JCT
Depression is actually very common in patients with PD and it is not thought to be completely “reactive”- there is a clear organic component. Coupled to Williams’ longstanding struggle with depression it must have been terrible for him.
My grandmother had severe PD – nicest person in the world and she suffered like hell.
Mnemosyne (iPad Mini)
If people don’t regularly listen to Marc Maron’s WTF podcast, he re-posted his 2010 interview with Williams with a new preface:
http://www.wtfpod.com/podcast/episodes/remembering_robin_williams
Knowing how Robin Williams used language, I can barely imagine how devastating a Parkinson’s diagnosis would be. Listen to that interview and hear how each of his stories is a full sentence with barely a pause or an “um” in sight. And to face the prospect of losing that facility?
SarahT
@JCT: I’m so sorry – it really is shitty.
Anne Laurie
@drkrick: Yeah, exactly.
Parkinson’s has taken Linda Rondstadt’s voice, and that was a great loss (not just for her), but after much sorrow & struggle she decided she had other things to keep her tied to the world.
For Williams, it must’ve felt like he was in the process of being robbed of the one thing that had always worked in his life.
different-church-lady
[points to link] Now, that’s a writer!
Tom Traubert
My father, 74, has Parkinson’s. I’m here to tell you that both depression and anxiety are very real components of the disease. The man was strong as a bull my entire life and then suddenly, about eight years ago, Parkinson’s took it all away and overnight he seemed old. It is an awful, horrible and poorly understood disease for which the treatments can be nearly as bad, seeing as how they come with their own suite dope side effects. It is hell on earth, and my heart is broken.
SarahT
@Anne Laurie: @Mnemosyne (iPad Mini): Last comment on this, promise : EVERYONE – and I mean EVERYONE – should have a Living Will. On that cheery note, thanks, BJ-ers – you really are something special and worthwhile on the internet (probably in real life, too ?!)
Little Boots
@SarahT: ‘
this is true. so damn lazy, but yeah, need to actually do something about this.
PurpleGirl
An aunt on my mother’s side (her oldest sister) had Parkinson’s. I don’t remember her with it because she and her husband had moved back to Sicily and that’s where she was when she developed it. I always felt sad for her.
Violet
@SarahT: Well he really did. I actually laughed. I wish he could have got his wish. I hope somewhere down the line people do.
Just read the David Simon piece linked above. Wow, that’s powerful. I’ve always seen sadness in Robin Williams as well. Maybe not in the Mork days, but certainly after that. Something in his eyes.
JCT
@Tom Traubert: It’s a cruel disease, Tom. And you are right, the variability in the response to treatment feels like a never-ending tease.
My grandmother went from a loving, vivacious and hilariously vibrant woman to a sad shell in the space of 10 years – only time I ever saw my father cry was after he would visit her.
Hang in there.
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
Well, this thread could use some cheering up. This worked for me. I was told today that someone who visited my office yesterday thought that I was only 30 y/o.
SarahT
@Tom Traubert: I’m so sorry, and you’re not alone. There are support groups, for whatever that’s worth. I know they help many caregivers. Anyway, make sure you take care of yourself – you’ll need the strength.
Little Boots
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):
speaking of dementia
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@Little Boots: I am a compliment slut. I’ll take ’em where I get ’em.
Little Boots
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):
and I’m a bitch. just can’t stop sometimes.
Anoniminous
Parkinson’s is a disease of the substantia nigra (SN) located in the mid-brain. The disease … arises from (?) … causes (?) … gradual death of dopamine neurons in the SN. The SN is the major component of the basil ganglia which associated with many different Central Nervous System functions among the most important is action selection (according to the most popular theory.) The SN plays a critical role in reward, addiction, and movement due to it’s importance in the dopamine cycle. One of the symptoms of Parkinson’s is depression, for someone already struggling with depression it must have been sheer hell.
There is no cure for Parkinson’s. The only treatment (pharmaceuticals) available target the motor system. There is only “management,” i.e., palliative care, for the decline in cognitive and psychological functioning.
Little Boots
you know I’m gonna ask for music soon, omnes. kind of slut I am.
PhoenixRising
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): Oh, honey.
People tell me I look 30 all the time, because of the wraparound dark glasses that cover my eyes. And the scar where the cells that were trying to kill me used to be. I find it deliciously ironic that until I got cancer, I looked my age.
I’m like that, finding enjoyment in having to opt out of the mud race that’s a cancer fundraiser…because I went to the doc which means biopsy sites that can’t get infected.
JCT
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): Not bad – the best I usually get are compliments on my white hair, at least folks realize that I went white very prematurely. So yeah, I take what I can get too.
Violet
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): And that someone was a good looking woman in her 20’s, right?
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@Little Boots: Not on this thread. Despite my little joke, it is a rather sad and somber one. Perhaps there will be an open one.
@Violet: No, it wasn’t. But I live in hope.
Little Boots
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):
yeah, it is.
dp
How terribly sad.
SarahT
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): Excellent ! Unless, of course, you’re 22 ? :) Love being mistaken for younger, though my standard response is, “Why yes, I AM 30 – in dog years.”…
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@Little Boots: If I posted music here, it would end up being Tom Waits’ “Tom Traubert’s Blues (Four Sheets to the Wind in Copenhagen)” – for some reason.
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@SarahT: I turned 50 earlier this month.
Suzanne
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): I want an open thread, too. I quit my job, in a gracious, professional fashion, and gave two weeks’ notice. My boss insulted me and implied that I was going to be a failure at my new job and that I should stay because I owe them for “investing” in me. I need advice. Sigh.
Suzanne
I got carded a few months ago. I thought it was awesome. I will be 35 in January, and I still get acne. I just get to have acne AND wrinkles. Lord.
Little Boots
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):
that, or any tom waits, would actually be wonderful, but no need.
SarahT
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): Mazel Tov ! You don’t look a day over 48 ! (I’m 54, so I can say that. I hope… If I’ve offended many apologies.
SarahT
@Suzanne: Enjoy it while you can !
scav
@Suzanne: Advice? I can certainly offer congratulations. Even habitually petty and mean bosses will generally only pull stunts like that if you’re good enough to want to keep. So that’s two wins to your account.
SarahT
@PhoenixRising: Wow. You hang in there – and keep those bitchin’ glasses !
PurpleGirl
@Suzanne: Did they pay for any course work you took? Did they pay for the professional exams? They they give you time off to prepare for the exams and take them? If not, they didn’t invest in you and you don’t owe them. He’s being a jerk. There’s nothing you can actually say to them, so don’t worry about it.
ETA: And congratulations on the professional advancement.
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@SarahT: No offense taken.
@Suzanne: You resigned to take a new and better position? Huzzah!
TheMightyTrowel
Age is funny. When Mr Trowel and I got together I was 23. He thought I was nearly 30. I’d always looked several years older than my true age so it didn’t bug me. In fact, he probably wouldn’t have made a move if he’d known how young I was at the time – he’s 13 years older than me. Now I’m in my early 30s and I look late 20s. For the first time in my life people think I’m younger than I am. It’s weird as hell. My mom’s whole family do this though – we hit 30ish and then don’t age normally. My mom is late 60s and she looks about 48/50. Her dad had 2 grey hairs when he died aged 78.
TheMightyTrowel
@Suzanne: Wanker boss is a jealous wanker. Super huge congrats on quitting and on your future amazing successes!
Suzanne
@PurpleGirl: They paid for the exams, though they pay for everyone’s exams, so it’s not like I got anything special. However, most companies give a large raise once you get licensed, and they didn’t give me a raise, saying that they can only give raises once a year. (Total bullshit.) I just don’t feel that paying $1500 for my exams and time off to take some of them means they are entitled to my labor at below (dramatically below) the market rate. I worked there for three and a half years, and I was entitled to a bit more grace. The place I am going will be paying me almost 10 G’s more than the place I’m leaving. I gave them PLENTY of extra time and effort and energy, and the insinuation that I owe them something is making me feel really bad.
Ruckus
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):
That feels good doesn’t it?
Three weeks ago someone guessed my age at 45. Told him sorry, haven’t been 45 for two decades. He was speechless. Getting older, what a pain(and yes some pleasure). Not exactly looking like it, priceless.
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@TheMightyTrowel: Didn’t Andy Warhol’s mother advise him to dress older when he was young so that he would look more youthful as he aged?
Moi? I just keep a portrait in the back room that I allow no one to see. It works for me, mate!
@Ruckus: Yeah, it does. If I were honestly assessing, I would say I could pass for 40 instead of 50, but if people want to go younger, it is no skin off my nose.
SarahT
Something uplifting (besides all the fine people on this thread): http://www.theguardian.com/world/2014/aug/15/ferguson-disarming-tactics-of-highway-patrol-pay-dividends-as-calm-descends
Suzanne
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): Yes, I got a job at another firm in PHX that has a full team devoted to the market that I am wanting to specialize in. In my current office, I am the only one who does work in that market, and I don’t get a lot of support from my team. Higher rank, fat stacks more cash, and a lot more flexibility to spend time with my kids, all in addition to working on what I want to work on.
My boss told me that they didn’t think I was ready for that position and that I was going to fail, and that “Suzanne, patience is a virtue.” Then he backtracked, said “you’ll do fine, you’re a very talented young lady,” then said that if I wasn’t getting to work on projects in my market that it was my fault and I should have brought more work into the firm.
TheMightyTrowel
@Suzanne: What a wanker. If i had a dollar for every time a dude more senior than me told me to be patient and my time would come i’d donate it all to getting those dudes castrated and it would be more than enough. You’re a rock star. Congratulations!
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@SarahT: Yeah. That is wonderful and so fucking simple. I live in a city that has a lot of protests and our cops generally are interested in making sure that the protests go off without a hitch. I recognize that I am lucky that way. What was happening in Ferguson was appalling and the difference is astounding -especially given how easy the change was.
Suzanne
@TheMightyTrowel: Thanks. I told him that my career was too important to sit around and wait while other people decided things for me. I’m just honestly so offended and hurt. I busted my ass and did a great job on their projects, and made my clients incredibly happy. And the thanks I get is basically verbal abuse.
Yatsuno
@Suzanne: Advice? BAIL. That’s bullshit and reason enough to leave right there.
SarahT
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): I know, right ? Treating people like human beings – that’s just crazy talk !
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@Suzanne: Blow him (not meant literally). Take the new position doing what you want to do and making fat stacks. Just make sure that you never badmouth the old firm. “They were great, but is was time for me to move on.” Don’t burn bridges. N’est-ce pas?
scav
@Suzanne: On the upside, he’s given you a solid base to not at all regret or second guess your departure.
Ruckus
@Suzanne:
Don’t feel bad. You worked for them, you didn’t indenture yourself. You worked you got paid. They didn’t fire you so you must have been doing something right. And I say this as a prior business owner who trained many people in the craft business I owned. They didn’t owe me anything when they left, I paid them, they worked. If they didn’t work or they screwed up all the time or they just didn’t get the work then we talked about why and I let them go. I hear many owners complain about employees owing them for the job. That’s bullshit. What you owe them is that you work to your best ability and they owe you reasonable money for that. They need you licensed and want to pay for that? That’s the cost of doing business. This job creator business chaps my ass. Yes I hired and paid people. I also charged 3 to 4 times the highest paid employee for my shop rate. I made money off of employees, no reason they shouldn’t have a reasonable share in that. Remember one thing if nothing else, without employees they’d be someone trying to make it big by themselves, and that’s very difficult. So fuck him. BTW I have also had paying jobs, the last one, a week after I gave 2 weeks notice, the CEO told me he could still fire me. Shocked the hell out of him when I said go right ahead, I get one week’s pay for each year I’ve been here. That’s an additional 10 weeks pay for doing something I was doing anyway. Please fire me. He declined.
ETA Just want to say that CEO was a good guy and I think he was kidding, but by then I really didn’t care if he was or not.
SarahT
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): Again, what you said: Went to one of the vigils earlier tonight here in NYC & after so many years of Ghouliani / Bloomberg sending out 3 cops for every protester, the distinct lack of over-the-top police presence was a bit startling, in a good way. I’ve plenty of cpmplaints about our new mayor’s handling of police brutality, but it was definitely good to see peaceful protestors treated as such.
piratedan
@Suzanne: so in other words, if there’s an exit interview, suggest that your current manager needs work on his people skills because any leverage that the soon to be former workplace had was lost as soon as that asshat opened his mouth to denigrate the team player that was performing the task of many and allowed said manager to prop his own numbers. I mean, if they’re gonna hand you the knife, might as well stick it all the way in. Don’t feel guilt, feel happy that there’s another place that sees value in your efforts, education and abilities and is willing to pay for them.
Your current manager is feeling panic because he’s got no backup plan (and most likely no primary plan either) and it’s going to make him look very ordinary when the first crap is flung post your departure.
Suzanne
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): No, I know to never spread anything bad. Whenever I go on a job interview, I always say incredibly nice things about any previous employer. I’m just pissed and hurt, and I am trying to think if there is any professional, upstanding way to return that parting shot.
@Yatsuno: No shit, right?! Like, is he trying to convince me to stay? I remember once I broke up with this guy I had been seeing, and he got incredibly nasty, saying that I was emotionally fucked up, that I had unresolved issues with my father, blah blah blah. When I pointed out that BS like this was in fact the reason I was dumping him, he immediately turned nice and basically begged me to stay. That conversation with my boss felt just like that.
Anoniminous
@Suzanne:
What you’ve posted is evidence of attempted psychological manipulation. Don’t fall for it!
That scumbag wouldn’t hesitate 2 nanoseconds to fire you. You owe scumbag and the rest of company absolutely nothing.
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@Ruckus: I had a grandfather who was a tool and dye maker. In the ’40s and during the war, he worked at a plant where he was the floor manager of the plant and made great money for his time. He was slightly medieval in his views and thought that as a Master of his craft, he should teach it to others. He took a position teaching his craft at the local vocational school at 1/3 his previous salary. He really held to the old guild idea that a master craftsman pass on his knowledge to others. I can use a grinder, a drill press, and a lathe, but I don’t pretend that I am a machinist. BTW, for fun, he made perfect spheres out of stainless steel using only his lathe.
Suzanne
@Anoniminous: What the dude should notice is that I was the first person in five years in my office to get licensed. Both I and the person who got licensed before me both left because we felt that we were being held back in our careers.
The ultimate irony is that the company finally changed my official title this week. LMMFAO.
Suzanne
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): I have a friend who got a degree in industrial design and then went to work as a machinist. He was doing auto parts, then got his boss to agree let him do a Kickstarter to make machined iPhone cases, pens, toys, and other little things. He got written up in some design mags for them. They’re really beautiful, and now the business is rejuvenated.
Anoniminous
@Suzanne:
Sounds like scumbag is somewhere on the high-functioning sociopathic scale. People like that don’t notice anything outside their own plans, wishes, desires, goals.
gian
@Suzanne:
they would show you less loyalty than the scorpion showed the frog.
what you’re seeing is the “oh shit, I never thought she’d stand up for herself” reaction.
A real “I see we screwed up and want to keep you reaction” would involve things like
“what would it take to keep you here”
“we’ve failed to reward your hard work like we should, how about we talk a new contract and a signing bonus”
the “you owe us” is not anything resembling noticing your worth, if you think about it.
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@Suzanne: After my grandfather retired, he kept a small shop in his garage. He made shit for car people who could not otherwise get parts.
SarahT
@Anoniminous: BINGO
Suzanne
@gian: That’s my feeling, too. I can’t wait for this to be over.
Violet
@Suzanne: Congrats on the new job! Your current boss sounds like a real wanker. You’re doing the right thing for you all around. He’s just confirmed that.
Don’t let someone else decide how you feel. You’ve made a great decision, a smart professional step, and a good move for your family. Feel good about it. Excited. Proud. Pat yourself on the back. The boss is being manipulative to cover his own inadequacies. Don’t take on his problems and make them your own. Brush that shit off your shoulders. Big things ahead!
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@Violet: Exactly this.
MattR
@Suzanne:
What exam do you have to take to get that title :)
But more seriously, I do agree with everyone else here. I hate the idea permeating our society (mostly from conservatives of course) that empoyees should be happy just to have a job and that they owe their employer a life long debt of gratitude for giving them a paycheck
Karen in GA
@Suzanne: Everyone’s already said it better. But yeah, your boss is an ass, and I’m glad you’re moving on. Congrats on your successful escape!
ETA: Will anything he said matter to you after you start your new job?
Suzanne
@MattR: Not surprisingly, this guy is mega-conservative. When I had my first interview with him, he mentioned that he was reading “Decision Points”. I held my tongue because I needed a job.
Suzanne
Thanks for the encouragement, all. This has been really eating at me, after the months of busting my ass for them.
am
Probably been posted already, but isn’t it great how the stupid people never make it hard to find them?
http://www.stltoday.com/news/local/crime-and-courts/mcculloch-blasts-nixon-for-replacing-st-louis-county-police-control/article_0806541b-ed48-5d06-9267-323531ad6cf1.html
Anne Laurie
@Suzanne: Congratulations on your new job!
My advice is to ignore your no-longer-boss. And maybe read some Basic Instructions, because Scott Meyer probably describes that jerk pretty well!
As for the wrinkles, doesn’t every Phoenexian over the age of twelve have wrinkles?
wasabi gasp
Karen Dalton – Blues on the Ceiling
Ruckus
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):
I started out as a mold maker, very similar to what your grandfather did. Really mold maker used to be tool and die maker but then plastics happened. I’ve had two other careers and now am back to working in a shop using the skills I learned decades ago. And of course still learning new things because life always changes. Without training people we wouldn’t have had about a third the staff we had over the years. Always had at least one apprentice who got raises with skill improvements, because they earned them and to keep a desire to learn and improve. Which is what business should be doing, you make a company more money you should get a bigger share.
A big part of our employment problem now is the MBA answer to profit. That is, always cut costs, profit! There is never an idea that improving the product or service quality is worth more, which is absolutely is. And as physical labor is a cost issue and has no value in the MBA outlook(if you wanted to add value you should have gone to college and learned to make money doing nothing is how I think it goes-I’m not knocking college, just the idea that physical labor is worthless) labor is a huge place to cut costs. I cut wages/cost, then you have to cut labor/cost and so on and so on. I call it the walmartization of business. And in time employees become less than worthless, or, why everyone I employe is stealing money from me, the great exalted job creator! It’s bullshit of course, but there you are.
BTW, nothing is perfect, but it can be perfect enough.
MattR
@am: Let’s try it once more for the stupid people. You know who you are. Maybe you don’t know who you are. Alright? Ready? Hand or pocket?
Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)
@Ruckus: My grandfather was brilliant at what he did. What others have done, he would let go as their work, not his.
SarahT
@am: @am: Sigh…
Ruckus
@Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):
As it should be. Yes it was my name on the door, yes I signed the checks, yes I orchestrated the work and the methodology but the employees got dirty, risked injury and most important, their intelligence and efforts created products(tools really) that people could use to do things otherwise not possible. In this day and age it is possible to do a lot in that business with fewer employees but modern machine tools become an absolute necessity. And they cost money as well. I thought about reopening my first business when the job I talked about above ended but I didn’t have the 3/4 to a mill in spare change laying about.
Anne Laurie
New thread atop (now that it’s probably too late for you all… )
maurinsky
My father has Parkinson’s, and he’s responding well to the treatments so far. His walk has gotten a little more shuffling; he speaks without much emotion and his enunciation is fuzzy. No shaking yet. His mother had it as well, and my older and younger sisters are both convinced that they will end up with it, too.
He was a difficult man to live with, though, and now he’s delightful to spend time with.
J R in WV
@Suzanne:
Suzanne,
Your boss is just a cruel bully, no other type of manager would land on a departing employee like that! He knows damm well you’ll do fine at your new job. You should consider filing a harassment complaint against him and cutting off the two weeks notice for cause.
As a professional software developer, team manager, and applications development shop mamager, that’s my professional advivce.
On the other hand, if you can stand to be around the bitch for the next 2 weeks, just sitck with it and look forward to your new job.
artem1s
@Suzanne:
Oh boy, I had the same thing happen to me when I quit once. Jackass boss told me I’d never be happy anywhere and how I was betraying him, cause I was one of the family; guy was clueless as to what a complete hot mess his family was. No one in their right minds would think belonging to that family was a great thing.
It was the beginning of a pretty long cycle of totally reinventing myself and my career. I quit the jewelry shop where I had worked for over 10 years; quit the profession less than 3 years after that; went back to school; taught myself how to use business and design software and write on a computer (instead of longhand, bleh); and then started working in the non profit world.
Ten years later I was visiting the shop – I would drop by occasionally when I was in that area, just to prove to myself I was better off, especially if I was having a rough patch. After chatting with his wife (hiring family members should be against the law) I went home, wiped my brow and forgot all about them. Two weeks later I get a call from the wife (husband was a passive aggressive fuck who used others for F2F conversations, especially if they were awkward ones). Turns out they need some extra help for the Holidays. It’s possible he thought they could grift me into doing piecework and pay me crap wages under the table. It was their pattern. They were always hiring people under financial stress and screwing them over royally.
But I really didn’t care what their angle was. Cause I got to say the thing I had been dreaming of saying since I had quit them. “You can’t afford me.” When asked for a number, cause she probably thought I was bluffing, the figure was a little less than what I was getting hourly in my full time work and roughly 3x what they had been paying me when I left. And I made sure she understood there would be no piece work; I would get paid by the hour and in full, and in cash after each and every day I worked. I was willing to handle the 1099 cause I knew they’d never want to pay the matching on me. But I made it clear that I would be reporting the income.
Said she discuss it with the husband and then never got back to me. It was quite possibly the most empowering10 minute phone conversation I have ever had. It was thoroughly worth all the doubt I had been through to make the change. It was art and it was golden.
'Niques
@Suzanne: Many years ago I ran a rather successful one-person typesetting studio. The owner often insisted she could replace me with someone who would do twice the work for half the pay. Her business closed its doors less than two months after I left. Still makes me smile.