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Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

Donald Trump found guilty as fuck – May 30, 2024!

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

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Damn right I heard that as a threat.

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Whoever he was, that guy was nuts.

New McCarthy, same old McCarthyism.

Human rights are not a matter of opinion!

A norm that restrains only one side really is not a norm – it is a trap.

America is going up in flames. The NYTimes fawns over MAGA celebrities. No longer a real newspaper.

But frankly mr. cole, I’ll be happier when you get back to telling us to go fuck ourselves.

If you cannot answer whether trump lost the 2020 election, you are unfit for office.

If you are still in the gop, you are either an extremist yourself, or in bed with those who are.

The rest of the comments were smacking Boebert like she was a piñata.

Jack Smith: “Why did you start campaigning in the middle of my investigation?!”

Too often we confuse noise with substance. too often we confuse setbacks with defeat.

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It’s pointless to bring up problems that can only be solved with a time machine.

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You are here: Home / Open Threads / Monday Night Open Thread

Monday Night Open Thread

by John Cole|  August 18, 20148:38 pm| 119 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads

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Spent the afternoon at the doctor, and he is thrilled with my progress. I’ve lost 40 lbs from peak John Cole, my blood pressure is great, and everything under my control is doing well. We scheduled a bunch of appointments- ENT to check my hearing and balance, as many of you suggested, a dermatologist to deal with some moles and skin tags, scheduled a sleep test since I haven’t had one in five years, and a sports therapy guy to deal with my shoulders (MRI’s, then probably injections and rehab to fix the hot mess that is my shoulders). Got rid of the vicodin and he game me a non-narcotic pill I take twice a day for the shoulders.

Also got some silver-based cream for the burn on my thigh, which I never told you about because I am tired of you all acting like I am the only person on the planet who hurts myself. At any rate, on Saturday morning before I had my accident at the barber, but before my weed-eater died on Saturday, I managed to give myself a second-degree burn on my thigh with the exhaust from the weed-eater. It melted through my shorts in a split second, and I had to douse it with ice and pick melted fabric out of the wound. Good times. I was actually planning to go to the pharmacy to find something after my haircut, but we all know how that turned out. At any rate, the stuff the doc gave me today is great. No more stinging!

Doc and I discussed having me off all meds by October if I keep on the current trajectory. I only take a mild blood pressure med as it is, but I want off everything and it is an attainable goal.

At any rate, back to substantive posting tomorrow.

Oh- does anyone have a suggestion for a cheap pedometer that will sync with my iPhone 5s? And thanks for all the German language advice. I think I am going to try out the DLI stuff first.

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Reader Interactions

119Comments

  1. 1.

    ? Martin

    August 18, 2014 at 8:41 pm

    because I am tired of you all acting like I am the only person on the planet who hurts myself

    Dude, we don’t think LeBron James is the only person on the planet who plays basketball. We just think he’s the best person on the planet that plays basketball. See the difference?

  2. 2.

    cckids

    August 18, 2014 at 8:43 pm

    I like the Argus app as a pedometer, but it does require that you have the phone on you, in a pocket or whatever. It works well, and has lots of stuff that I don’t use, like food/weight tracking, etc. It counts steps as steps, or distance.

    Free app.

  3. 3.

    JPL

    August 18, 2014 at 8:43 pm

    I just started medicare and blue cross already had me do a survey. One of the questions was how many times have I fallen in the past year. I laughed and said none. We all know why I laughed.

  4. 4.

    EZSmirkzz

    August 18, 2014 at 8:44 pm

    I’m glad no one told you good morning today. Glad to here you’re progressing so well on all the other fronts too. I will miss the keystone cop aspect of your life, but with the wieght and medication out of your system you may wind up do acrobatics and such, so I hold out hope for my selfish entertainment at your expense. Keep the faith brother.

  5. 5.

    coin operated

    August 18, 2014 at 8:45 pm

    Nike+ app. Uses the iPhone GPS. I’ve been using it for a couple of years now to track my runs and I’m very happy with it.

    Edited to add…get yourself a bluetooth headset and sync it up with the tunes on your phone. Nothing like running with some old skool heavy metal for motivation.

  6. 6.

    JPL

    August 18, 2014 at 8:47 pm

    @EZSmirkzz: Wow aren’t you the optimistic one.

    you may wind up do acrobatics

  7. 7.

    AkaDad

    August 18, 2014 at 8:47 pm

    I used to come here just to read John’s rantings, now I stay to see what kind of bizarre injuries he can inflict upon himself.

  8. 8.

    Violet

    August 18, 2014 at 8:49 pm

    Wow! That sounds great! Glad you are doing so well.

    No advice on the pedometer but will be interested in hearing what people say.

    I was doing some light gardening last night, stood up and my lower left back had a stabbing pain. No idea what I did. I hate getting old.

  9. 9.

    Mnemosyne

    August 18, 2014 at 8:49 pm

    You don’t need a separate pedometer for your iPhone 5 — there’s one built in.

    (Took out wrong link)

  10. 10.

    raven

    August 18, 2014 at 8:53 pm

    @JPL: I filed for medicare yesterday and, in looking at my BCBS, I found that the VA billed them for all my appointments related to hearing aids. It the law I guess.

  11. 11.

    Anne Laurie

    August 18, 2014 at 8:53 pm

    Good for you, John! So glad to hear you’re making progress on all fronts!

    (P.S. You did mention you’d burned yourself, while burning out your weedwhacker, but none of us wanted to pester you about that while you had so much else going on…)

  12. 12.

    muddy

    August 18, 2014 at 8:54 pm

    That Silvadene cream is the best. I hope they told you to put it on thick, “like frosting”. That was the specific advice I got and had a great result. I had a 3rd degree burn on my arm doing a raku firing. The crater on my forearm filled in under that cream. Funny part is that there are “freckle streaks” from the outside margin in – it’s like if there was a freckle there the new skin cloned it and dragged it along as it filled the hole. And there is one lone freckle right in the middle of it, the only freckle I actually know when it occurred. Still it’s cool that actual skin grew back and it’s not a total scar.

  13. 13.

    Kathryn

    August 18, 2014 at 8:55 pm

    This is so brilliant:

    John Oliver on police militarization: ‘Take it all away from them’.

  14. 14.

    bbleh

    August 18, 2014 at 8:56 pm

    Re burn, consider Vitamin E oil or ointment. Not a panacea, but in my experience does speed healing and reduce pain notably.

  15. 15.

    muddy

    August 18, 2014 at 8:57 pm

    Also, I don’t think it’s a freakish accident, I once burned the crap out of my leg because I picked up the mini-tiller wrong with one hand and it swung towards me. Could happen to anyone, clearly.

    Also too, I just found out cats love coconut. Or this one does. I put coconut oil on my hair and he’s sitting on the back of the couch licking my head. Loud purrs.

  16. 16.

    Olivia

    August 18, 2014 at 8:57 pm

    It is great to see your progress. I hope you solve the falling over problem. I have broken and smashed so many things that most people don’t because I fall all the time. I think my problem is that my eyes don’t track together well. I used to just take it in stride but things hurt more and don’t heal as well now that I am old.
    I don’t know what you consider cheap but I use the FitBitOne and I like it a lot. I also use RunKeeper on my phone for when I want to see my route and the two apps can sync.

  17. 17.

    KG

    August 18, 2014 at 8:58 pm

    @? Martin: there in one. Well done sir

  18. 18.

    bbleh

    August 18, 2014 at 9:00 pm

    Consider vitamin-E oil or ointment. In my experience, speeds healing and reduces pain.

  19. 19.

    Mnemosyne

    August 18, 2014 at 9:02 pm

    Also, too:

    I managed to give myself a second-degree burn on my thigh with the exhaust from the weed-eater. It melted through my shorts in a split second, and I had to douse it with ice and pick melted fabric out of the wound.

    For chrissakes, people, don’t wear nylon or rayon while working near a heat source or flame! There was a really tragic accident at UCLA a few years ago where a graduate student in chemistry died because she was wearing a nylon sweater and it melted to her body when it caught on fire. Natural fibers only, preferably cotton or wool.

  20. 20.

    Comrade Mary

    August 18, 2014 at 9:03 pm

    Good to hear that you’re doing so well on so many fronts, John!

    And in a year where I a) crashed to the ice and got a concussion plus follow-up vertigo b) let years of bad posture catch up with me and leave me with a pinched nerve in my neck due to some subluxation c) developed plantar fasciitis from ramping up too much walking too soon this summer d) slipped down the wet back steps, leaving bruises and road rash e) trashed my bike’s rear wheel (my bike, c’est moi) and f) cut myself while washing my friend’s awesome Lee Valley knife just yesterday, I appreciate that you’re still acting as my pace car for personal injury.

    But you can stop now. Really. Please. We’d all like to keep you, you know?

  21. 21.

    Violet

    August 18, 2014 at 9:04 pm

    @Mnemosyne: Remember seeing something about a plane crash where people survived but there was a fire. Many of them had burns and those wearing non-natural fiber clothing were burned worse. They said after that every time they flew they wore cotton.

  22. 22.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    August 18, 2014 at 9:04 pm

    @AkaDad: That’s what I like too, it gives me this impression that there’s some place out there, sort of out in the country, but like a giant Rube Goldberg machine with everyone tripping and crashing into things on pretty much a daily basis.

    In contrast with my life which contains two bike rides and two boat rides daily and all in the middle of an incredibly busy city where things really are flying all around you, and yet I never run into anything. Boring.

    JC in a recent photo.

  23. 23.

    Comrade Mary

    August 18, 2014 at 9:04 pm

    (Holy shit! Just how many of us used the “on all fronts” phrase in this thread so far?)

  24. 24.

    Poopyman

    August 18, 2014 at 9:06 pm

    @Olivia: , @Cole:

    I hope you both consider taking yoga to help with balance and flexibility. I’d been doing it for years before I developed problems with vertigo, and the yoga training has kept me upright every time I get hit with another bout. It works.

  25. 25.

    Pogonip

    August 18, 2014 at 9:06 pm

    @muddy: What’s a raku? (The ghost of Steve Jobs wanted to change the word to “army.”)

  26. 26.

    Nicole

    August 18, 2014 at 9:07 pm

    My husband likes an app called Map My Run that keeps track of distance and uses GPS to show what your route looked like. No reason it shouldn’t work for walking, too. They also offer a few other options- Map My Fitness, etc.

    Jezebel had an article about a runner who used an app like this to draw dicks on her runs. That woman is my hero. Because deep down I’m twelve.

  27. 27.

    rikyrah

    August 18, 2014 at 9:08 pm

    Glad to hear about your progress Cole.
    Keeping you in my prayers.

  28. 28.

    Poopyman

    August 18, 2014 at 9:11 pm

    @Violet: The British learned that the hard way during the Falklands War, when their sailors were wearing synthetic long underwear.

  29. 29.

    Pogonip

    August 18, 2014 at 9:12 pm

    @Poopyman: Traditional Japanese martial arts improved my balance and, oddly enough, made me a better dancer. And there are pads on the floor of a dojo, which is good for when John falls over something.

    I was backing up once, tripped over a wrinkle in the mat, and fell flat. No time to think how to do it right; I just fell. My teacher leaned over me and said, “That was a really good fall!”

  30. 30.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    August 18, 2014 at 9:13 pm

    because I am tired of you all acting like I am the only person on the planet who hurts myself

    Everyone manages a shitload of small injuries of some kind – barking one’s shin, skinning a knuckle, etc. – and a few major ones during the course of a lifetime. You seem to acquire the major ones at the rate that many of us acquire the little ones.

    And yeah, I’ve done contact sports, dangerous sports, and incredibly stupid shit too.

  31. 31.

    muddy

    August 18, 2014 at 9:16 pm

    @Pogonip: It’s a kind of ceramic firing. Basically you have pots in the kiln with glaze on them, you pull them out when it’s melted (maybe 1800*F), and put them in sealed containers filled with combustibles. The stuff wants to burn because the pot is so hot, but there is no oxygen. So the oxygen gets pulled out of the glaze materials. You get various metallic effects. A clear glaze crackles, leaving carbon in the cracks. Bare clay turns black.

  32. 32.

    Pogonip

    August 18, 2014 at 9:18 pm

    I went looking for more labors of love on old TV shows; so far all I found was another version of Star Trek. Unfortunately in that one the guy playing Kirk couldn’t act, and since Kirk’s the main character he’s in nearly every scene, so I only lasted 7 minutes. Also they used the new unimproved Klingons. (I have always wondered why Star Trek, Inc., decided to render their best villains ludicrous by pasting egg cartons on their foreheads.)

    Still hoping to find a labor-of-love Outer Limits or, the Holy Television Grail, the Twilight Zone. No luck so far.

  33. 33.

    Pogonip

    August 18, 2014 at 9:19 pm

    @muddy: Raku on, baby!

  34. 34.

    Comrade Mary

    August 18, 2014 at 9:21 pm

    @Pogonip: Raku is a FUCKING AWESOME Japanese pottery technique. It’s a relatively low-temperature approach to firing glazes, but can still produce wonderful crazing (crackling) effects in the glaze. You can play also around with the balance of oxygen when firing a pot. A reduction atmosphere (low oxygen because the pot is smothered in sawdust/less air intake is permitted) can produce very dark grey to black unglazed portions, and will adjust how glazes react (e.g will copper-based glaze appear copper-y or more blue-green).

    See more here and here.

  35. 35.

    raven

    August 18, 2014 at 9:21 pm

    @rikyrah: Messages for you back yonder.

  36. 36.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    August 18, 2014 at 9:22 pm

    @Pogonip: There’s a cousin of it also called pit firing, where you bury pots in a hole and depending on various things you bury them with and whether any parts are exposed, you get a combination of black and all sorts of colors and effects. Did that on the beach a couple of times in a group, you make a day of it, wrap the pottery in kelp and whatever else you want, leave it all day and hang out on the beach, then dig it all up later and see what you got. One of the most enjoyable experiences I can remember, just great.

    google.com/search?q=pit+firing&newwindow=1&rlz=1C1CHFX_enUS590US590&es_sm=122&so…

  37. 37.

    Southern Beale

    August 18, 2014 at 9:23 pm

    I didn’t have a lot of luck with the iPhone fitness app I used, apparently the GPS in the iPhone is kinda sucky and that makes the apps glitchy. Couple of friends of mine use the Fit Bit (I think that’s how it’s spelled). Syncs with the laptop.

  38. 38.

    Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism

    August 18, 2014 at 9:24 pm

    Silvadene is absolutely amazing. I had severe second degree burns over about 20% of my body (we’re talking blisters the size of goose eggs here). Back at work two weeks later, all healed up. Just had to stay out of the sun for a while.

    In addition to the usual pedometer apps, you might want to look into something like The Walk (by the same people who did Zombies! Run! for runners).

  39. 39.

    Stella B.

    August 18, 2014 at 9:24 pm

    Great, now we’re going to have another Ta-Nehisi Coates, except that we will get to discuss German literature instead of French. Looking forward to that /sarcasm.

  40. 40.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    August 18, 2014 at 9:24 pm

    @Bill E Pilgrim: I’ve done something like that with lobsters, clams, and corn-on-the-cob.

  41. 41.

    Shana

    August 18, 2014 at 9:24 pm

    @bbleh: Vitamin E oil also helps reduce scarring.

  42. 42.

    raven

    August 18, 2014 at 9:25 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): Luau same same

  43. 43.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    August 18, 2014 at 9:26 pm

    @Shana: But Keanu said that “Chicks dig scars.”

  44. 44.

    Roger Moore

    August 18, 2014 at 9:26 pm

    @Mnemosyne:

    There was a really tragic accident at UCLA a few years ago where a graduate student in chemistry died because she was wearing a nylon sweater and it melted to her body when it caught on fire. Natural fibers only, preferably cotton or wool.

    FWIW, the sweater was acrylic, not nylon. Our safety department made a Big Fucking Deal about it, probably because her boss has been charged with felonies for the unsafe lab practices that led to her death. I’d generally agree with the natural fabric suggestion, unless you want to pay the big bucks for Nomex gear.

  45. 45.

    raven

    August 18, 2014 at 9:27 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): I guess I shouldn’t worry about my MOHS surgery then.

  46. 46.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    August 18, 2014 at 9:28 pm

    @raven: Mine was New England, but yeah. More edible than clay pots.

  47. 47.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    August 18, 2014 at 9:29 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): Those would probably taste better.

  48. 48.

    Pogonip

    August 18, 2014 at 9:30 pm

    @Stella B.: Well, at least it’ll give him a change of topic. He had turned into Johnny One-note. Maybe he just flat ran out of ideas.

  49. 49.

    Dave

    August 18, 2014 at 9:30 pm

    FitBit One. Has a display, tells you steps, miles, calories on the fly. Also has a sleep tracker that is pretty cool. Synchs with IPhone.

  50. 50.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    August 18, 2014 at 9:32 pm

    @Dave: Does it work for cycling?

  51. 51.

    Brian R.

    August 18, 2014 at 9:32 pm

    I do hurt myself sometimes.

    But three major injuries in three separate incidents on a single Saturday? Christ.

  52. 52.

    Wag

    August 18, 2014 at 9:32 pm

    I highly recommend the fitbit pedometer for my patients. I usually recommend an initial goal 8000 steps per day and quickly ramping it up to at least 10000 steps. A patients wife set her goal at 20000 steps per day and was able to drop 120 lbs in a year. Walking is what humans evolved to do. The current sedentary lifestyle will kill is faster than global warming.

    But not as fast as an over militarized police force.

  53. 53.

    Roger Moore

    August 18, 2014 at 9:33 pm

    @Southern Beale:

    Couple of friends of mine use the Fit Bit (I think that’s how it’s spelled). Syncs with the laptop.

    FitBit will also sync with an iPhone or most recent generation Androids. I find the most useful function is that it serves as a nag when I’m tempted to skip a workout; I know my weekly fitness report will look bad if I do. I got mine because Mnemosyne gave such a positive review of hers.

  54. 54.

    Shana

    August 18, 2014 at 9:36 pm

    Glad to hear about the weight loss among other things. 40 pounds is quite significant and while you may or may not be pleased about it as a part of the whole, it’s nothing to sneeze at. It also will make all the other stuff, with the exception of the shoulders, better.

    After growing up with an alcoholic father who quit drinking for decades and then started again and got worse over time although was still fairly functional, I admire very much your work getting help and getting sober. Unlike my dad, you aren’t shying away from the hard truth of yourself. I admire that greatly.

  55. 55.

    SIA

    August 18, 2014 at 9:39 pm

    @muddy: we leave a dish of extra virgin organic coconut oil out with the cat food. They LOVE it and their coats are unbelievably soft. It’s also an anti viral. Good stuff.

  56. 56.

    raven

    August 18, 2014 at 9:39 pm

    Braves whuppin up on the Bucs!

  57. 57.

    Porco Rosso

    August 18, 2014 at 9:40 pm

    I use my fitness pal on the 5s. It’s got the motion coprocessor in the 5s so it tracks steps even in airplane mode. I’m getting about 13,000 steps in per weekday

  58. 58.

    beth

    August 18, 2014 at 9:42 pm

    @Nicole: I second the Map My Walk recommendation. It’s a very easy app to use as evidenced by the fact that even I can use it. I tried to draw my daughter’s name on a walk once, didn’t work out too well. I can’t imagine making an actual picture (although a rudimentary dick probably wouldn’t be too hard).

  59. 59.

    ? Martin

    August 18, 2014 at 9:42 pm

    Oh- does anyone have a suggestion for a cheap pedometer that will sync with my iPhone 5s

    The iPhone 5S _IS_ a pedometer.

    Get an Pedometer++ is popular. I use Moves.

    I live Moves because it also tracks my running and cycling, though it doesn’t have goal setting. It’s reasonably accurate and overlays your activity on the built-in map. It also calculates calories and time.

    In about a month Apple will release HealthKit which should include a built-in app that collects that information and tracks it over time along with a host of other health data.

  60. 60.

    dnfree

    August 18, 2014 at 9:43 pm

    I have a Fitbit One that just clips on to my pocket, but they cost $99. It can sync with your computer or your phone or tablet, whatever you want. It seems reasonably accurate–that’s the problem with cheap pedometers, not being accurate. The one I have also has a little window where you can check your progress even if you’re not near your computer or whatever.

    My goal is 6500 steps a day because that’s what I can generally do and it means about 1/2 hour of walking at a good pace in addition to whatever normal walking I do. Setting your goal too high is just discouraging. I’m pleased if I get to 7500 or 8000 or more, and if I only get to 5000 I try to make it up another day. But I’m a little older than some of you. There is no “scientific” basis for the 10,000 number.

    This patient’s wife who walked 20,000 steps a day–did she have a job? At a pace of about 7,000 steps an hour (which is about what I can manage), that would be almost 3 hours of walking.

  61. 61.

    Cacti

    August 18, 2014 at 9:43 pm

    Ferguson pigs arrest another journalist. This time a Getty Images photographer for not getting out of the way fast enough.

  62. 62.

    raven

    August 18, 2014 at 9:44 pm

    It’s fun to read all this fitness app stuff. When you’ve always been a gym rat it doesn’t take an app to get to the workout but, hey, whatever works for ya.

  63. 63.

    raven

    August 18, 2014 at 9:44 pm

    dupe

  64. 64.

    EZSmirkzz

    August 18, 2014 at 9:45 pm

    @JPL: Yeah, John’s so damned lovable I can’t help but have hope. :-D

  65. 65.

    muddy

    August 18, 2014 at 9:47 pm

    @SIA: I had no idea they were so into it, I’d have given it sooner! He needs his own dish, he’s bugging the hell out of me.

  66. 66.

    SIA

    August 18, 2014 at 9:54 pm

    @muddy: yeah the kitties get kind of crazed for coconut oil. I feed it to the pups too occasionally. They will eat it if they need it. It helps with skin issues and and general health. I use it myself, topically and internally. See earthclinic.com for lots of good info.

  67. 67.

    Helen

    August 18, 2014 at 9:55 pm

    @raven: Dunno exactly what the law on that is but I believe my dad had a choice – Medicaid or VA and he chose VA. LOVES his docs. I think you pic one or the other and when you pic one the one you don’t pic pays the other….or something.. HOW DUMB IS THAT? Single payer, YAY

  68. 68.

    schrodinger's cat

    August 18, 2014 at 9:55 pm

    @muddy: How is your prodigal kitteh?

  69. 69.

    mellowjohn

    August 18, 2014 at 10:26 pm

    sweet jeebuz, i thought i was a klutz!

  70. 70.

    muddy

    August 18, 2014 at 10:30 pm

    @SIA: I use it for so many things! I wait for the good kind to go on sale at the co-op and then buy about 5 at a time. I’m not above eating it out of the jar with a spoon.

  71. 71.

    Birthmarker

    August 18, 2014 at 10:32 pm

    John, there are medications your doc can give you to protect your gall bladder during a time of rapid weight loss. I do know that gall bladder removal can mess with digestion in ways that can be unpleasant.

    Here’s a paragraph I clipped that shows the names of a couple of drugs, if you wish to take it up with your doctor.

    Preventing Gallstones During Weight Loss

    Maintaining a normal weight and avoiding rapid weight loss are the keys to reducing the risk of gallstones. Taking the medication ursodiol (also called ursodeoxycholic acid, or Actigall) during weight loss may reduce the risk for people who are very overweight and need to lose weight quickly. This medication is ordinarily used to dissolve existing gallstones. Orlistat (Xenical), a drug for treating obesity, may protect against gallstone formation during weight loss. The drug appears to reduce bile acids and other components involved in gallstone production.

  72. 72.

    muddy

    August 18, 2014 at 10:33 pm

    @schrodinger’s cat: He’s good, he was the one that was licking my hair. I made them stay in totally for a while, but they were very sad, and the newly slim one porked right back up. Now I let them out in the morning. They come in the afternoon to have a snack, and then I make them stay in after that. So they aren’t out at night with the predators. It seems to be working, they have accepted this lesser freedom.

  73. 73.

    muddy

    August 18, 2014 at 10:35 pm

    @Birthmarker: My nephew lost 70# and then had to have his gallbladder out. They said it was common after a large weightloss like that.

  74. 74.

    Mnemosyne

    August 18, 2014 at 10:38 pm

    @Roger Moore:

    Ah, okay. I knew it was one of the man-made fibers, because those things are fucking dangerous.

    Silk and wool are both self-extinguishing, which means they stop burning as soon as the flame is taken away. Get a silk/wool blend sweater or sweater vest for the lab and you’re all set.

  75. 75.

    Mnemosyne

    August 18, 2014 at 10:41 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):

    My old FitBit Flex didn’t work well for cycling, but my FitBit Force does. Unfortunately, some people were allergic to the nickel used in the “surgical stainless steel” part that sits on your wrist, so it was recalled. You might be able to find one on eBay. You can also use it in conjunction with MapMyRide or Endomondo — either program will “talk” to the FitBit.

    (I am not allergic to nickel and had no problems, so I kept mine despite the recall and still use it every day.)

  76. 76.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 18, 2014 at 10:50 pm

    @AkaDad:

    I used to come here just to read John’s rantings, now I stay to see what kind of bizarre injuries he can inflict upon himself.

    I have a FB friend who, at roughly the same time as John was getting himself shat upon by a bird, followed by the freak barber-chair shoulder-dislocation thing, managed to rip up a tendon in her foot, followed by slicing the everloving fuck out of her hand while preparing dinner. Was this just an exceptionally weird weekend?

  77. 77.

    Jane2

    August 18, 2014 at 10:53 pm

    Fitbit….it’s the only pedometer worth talking about.

  78. 78.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 18, 2014 at 10:54 pm

    @muddy:

    I love raku, can’t wait to have you show me your work.

  79. 79.

    Svensker

    August 18, 2014 at 10:54 pm

    You did too tell us about the burn, but you just kind slid it by like we wouldn’t notice or anything. Think you’re slick, huh?

    Glad to hear about your progress. Great to “hear” your voice sounding so clear and clean. Yay, you.

    @muddy: I’m still laughing about the kitty licking the coconut head.

  80. 80.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 18, 2014 at 10:57 pm

    @raven:

    It’s been an enjoyable game.

  81. 81.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 18, 2014 at 10:59 pm

    @Cacti:

    Somebody soon needs to do a comprehensive review of all the First Amendment violations that have gone down in Ferguson this week.

  82. 82.

    Valdivia

    August 18, 2014 at 11:00 pm

    Haven’t read the thread but I would recommend the clip on FitBit. It’s fabulous abd I found it better than the wrist one. Sinks with phone and also food journaling apps.

    So glad you’re doing so well John. You’re inspiring for everyone trying toske their own lives better.

  83. 83.

    Suzanne

    August 18, 2014 at 11:05 pm

    So Friday is my last day, and it cannot come fast enough. I am being treated like a traitorous leper. Adding a comic note…..after the Principal of my office guilt-tripped me about leaving after getting my license, the VPs in my office left me a $50 gift card. Other firms give multi-thousand-dollar raises or bonuses for licensure. I got $50, with some extra added fuck you on top. So tomorrow I am giving it back. I need my integrity more than I need $50.

    I have also been asked not to tell my clients that I am leaving. That’s okay. They’ll find out on Monday. When they get my email. From my new email account. Smirk.

  84. 84.

    RAM

    August 18, 2014 at 11:06 pm

    Jesus, Cole, every time I start feeling down, I read one of your posts and decide my life is simply coming up roses.

  85. 85.

    GHayduke (formerly lojasmo)

    August 18, 2014 at 11:07 pm

    1) congratulations on the BP. Mine went from 140 (or so) to about 115 after I quit.

    2) Weight loss. I am also down about 35 pounds from peak Hayduke. Good job.

    3) I use run keeper. It’s just an app, but it will track running, biking, hiking, walking, etc.

    4) sleep. I stopped snoring when I stopped drinking, and my apnea seems to have departed as well. I need to get mine re-checked as well. Thanks for the reminder.

  86. 86.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    August 18, 2014 at 11:09 pm

    @Suzanne: Buy something immensely tacky with it and leave it behind when you go.

  87. 87.

    Suzanne

    August 18, 2014 at 11:14 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): My mom says I should just take it and keep my mouth shut, to avoid burning bridges. Sigh. I probably should.

  88. 88.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    August 18, 2014 at 11:18 pm

    @Suzanne: You could donate it to a women’s shelter or something like that.

  89. 89.

    MomSense

    August 18, 2014 at 11:27 pm

    Have an extra boy at the house tonight. My son’s friend texted him in a panic because of a domestic violence incident tonight. My son went and picked him up and brought him home. He is calm and ok for the moment but will need a lot of support going forward. I can’t believe none of us ever figured out that this was going on.

    His mom is safe right now and dad is out of the house. He is going to stay at least until school starts again and he goes back to his dorm. He is just so tired and sad and confused and it breaks my heart.

  90. 90.

    Citizen_X

    August 18, 2014 at 11:36 pm

    I’ve lost 40 lbs from peak John Cole

    Woohoo! Congratulations!

    I am tired of you all acting like I am the only person on the planet who hurts myself.

    No, John. You’re just half of them.

  91. 91.

    Suffern ACE

    August 18, 2014 at 11:38 pm

    I other news, Chicago bans something involving music and dancing. I don’t know what it is, but on the surface, but it seems that the young folks need Kevin Bacon to come and save them. again.

  92. 92.

    Culture of Truth

    August 18, 2014 at 11:42 pm

    I managed to give myself a second-degree burn on my thigh with the exhaust from the weed-eater. It melted through my shorts in a split second

    Nailed it.

  93. 93.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    August 18, 2014 at 11:52 pm

    @Suffern ACE: Lovely. The birthplace of house music is banning EDT?

  94. 94.

    Ernest Pikeman

    August 18, 2014 at 11:58 pm

    I got a Garmin Vivofit for my 50th recently. Used some crappy Omron pedometer that syncs to a computer (Windows only, blech) for about three months before that.

    Started walking much more, lost about 3 inches of waistline so far, but not that many pounds.

    I’m surprised how motivating it is to see graphs of the amount of steps I take every day. I hit 7000-10000 a day.

  95. 95.

    Mike E

    August 19, 2014 at 12:04 am

    Letterman just did a tribute to Robin William…heartfelt and moving.

  96. 96.

    JohnM

    August 19, 2014 at 12:22 am

    Glad this wasn’t tagged ‘I Hate All of You”. Seriously, good on you man. You are an inspiration for all of us out here like you!

  97. 97.

    Cervantes

    August 19, 2014 at 12:26 am

    @Suzanne:

    My mom says I should just take it and keep my mouth shut, to avoid burning bridges. Sigh. I probably should.

    Take it, and then take out a full-page ad in a suitable publication thanking them profusely for their $50 gift card.

  98. 98.

    KS in MA

    August 19, 2014 at 12:27 am

    @Suzanne:

    Congratulations!

  99. 99.

    KS in MA

    August 19, 2014 at 12:31 am

    @Cervantes:

    Ooo, that’s brilliant! I’m gonna remember that for when I quit my job.

  100. 100.

    JaneE

    August 19, 2014 at 12:32 am

    I like the Fitbit Flex. It is $100. You just leave it on your wrist – I need to charge mine about every 5 or 6 days. It is a pain to put on, but I only need to do it once a week. There is a usb dongle you plug into your computer and it syncs automagically. Or you can bluetooth sync to a phone app. It doesn’t work with all phones, but most of the newer ones, including your 5s. You can wear it in the shower and while swimming, but they say it doesn’t accurately count calories for water activity. They also make a $60 clip on one that uses watch batteries and is splash, but not water resistant.
    You could use your phone’s motion tracker and just get an app to display the results, if you keep it in a belt clip or your pocket all the time, or don’t care if it is 100% counting every step. My phone spends too much of its time sitting on the desk or end table to be able to use its stats reliably.

  101. 101.

    Suzanne

    August 19, 2014 at 12:35 am

    @Cervantes: That would be fucking HILARIOUS.

    I will probably go the kill-them-with-kindness route. They are already scared that I will steal their clients.

    If I had the money, I would pay four or five of my better coworkers to quit simultaneously. I would love to see that gasket blow.

  102. 102.

    Violet

    August 19, 2014 at 12:47 am

    @Suzanne:

    If I had the money, I would pay four or five of my better coworkers to quit simultaneously. I would love to see that gasket blow.

    Perhaps your new firm can help you with that. Some places offer a “finders fee” if you recommend someone, they get hired, and stay for three or six months or whatever. Maybe you can recommend some of your good co-workers to your new place when it seems appropriate. And get paid for it.

    Keep the gift card. Depending on what it is for, do something nice for yourself and your family or donate it. Plenty of good organizations around that can use some help. Hell, give it to a homeless person or save it for Christmas and drop it in the Salvation Army bucket. They’ve already spent the money. Might as well decide what you want to do with their money.

  103. 103.

    PIGL

    August 19, 2014 at 1:25 am

    John, that is to say, Mr. Cole:

    How in blazes did you lose 40lbs, and that in the past few months, as I understand. I need to do the same: please share your method.

  104. 104.

    Mnemosyne

    August 19, 2014 at 1:37 am

    @PIGL:

    He stopped drinking a bottle of scotch every night. Works like a charm.

  105. 105.

    Original Lee

    August 19, 2014 at 1:42 am

    @Wag: I love my Fitbit, and I think I’ve converted my cardiologist and endocrinologist to it, too. I have the Flex, which is maybe pricier than what Cole is looking for. I have my goal set for 10,000 steps, which means each flashing dot is 2,000 steps. Really good for when I haven’t been moving much – when I check my status and have only one dot, I know I have to get my butt in gear. I like that I get a little encouraging message when I get close to goal, and the weekly reports are good, too.

    I know it sounds cheesy, but when I hit goal and all the dots flash like Fourth of July, it makes me feel really good.

    I also like the dashboard function on the desktop. The food log keeps a running total of stats for you, which is good, because I tend to round down and guesstimate totals.

  106. 106.

    currants

    August 19, 2014 at 1:57 am

    RunKeeper for your phone. Free, and multi-use.

  107. 107.

    Mnemosyne

    August 19, 2014 at 2:06 am

    @PIGL:

    More serious answer: I can’t remember if you are a lady or a gentleman, but if you are a lady who is having trouble losing weight no matter what you do, be sure to get a full panel run on your thyroid to make sure it’s functioning properly. (It’s probably also a good idea if you are a dude, but thyroid issues are somewhat less common in men, IIRC.) Don’t let them do just the basic test — insist on a full panel.

  108. 108.

    patty \

    August 19, 2014 at 3:01 am

    congratulations john. that is awesome!!!

  109. 109.

    Carrie

    August 19, 2014 at 6:20 am

    I would LOVE to have a regular weekly post on health, weight-loss and diet regimen. It would be a great way to get info and tips. I requested one last year but it never materialized….can we make this happen?

  110. 110.

    Sir Laffs-a-Lot

    August 19, 2014 at 7:32 am

    great to hear JC; heal fast!

  111. 111.

    Porco Rosso

    August 19, 2014 at 9:00 am

    tuaw.com/2013/10/10/seven-apps-that-take-advantage-of-the-m7-motion-coprocessor-in-t/

    Yet another article on the M7 motion coprocessor built into the 5s.

  112. 112.

    Birthmarker

    August 19, 2014 at 9:29 am

    @muddy: After I retired, I slowly lost (over 2 or 3 years) about 50 pounds, then got to have my gall bladder out! I wish my doc had picked up on the risk.

  113. 113.

    narya

    August 19, 2014 at 9:29 am

    I have a fitbit flex as well, and I like it–it has helped me lose nearly 20 pounds. For awhile, I used it with My Fitness Pal, which is a pretty good calorie-counting app/website; the fitbit and MFP can sync, so the fitbit will adjust your allowable calories. You can also enter your own meals/recipes, so you’re not limited; it’s a bit time-consuming, but it can be very useful to really see what you’re eating.

  114. 114.

    Jim Bales

    August 19, 2014 at 10:11 am

    Re pedometer:

    About 3 weeks ago I got a Misfit Shine activity and sleep monitor. (Retails for ~$100, Amazon has it for ~$90)

    It has been transformative for me. I wear it, it syncs with the iPhone via Bluetooth, it looks nice, and has an easy to read display. Makes a dandy watch as well

    It automatically tracks exertion and sleep (if you wear it while sleeping), including deep vs. shallow sleep periods. You can also enter your weight as often as once a day and that too is tracked and plotted on the phone.

    It isn’t cheap, but is water resistant, elegant, tracks both effort and sleep, and it motivates me.

    Best
    Jim

  115. 115.

    Interrobang

    August 19, 2014 at 10:18 am

    @Suzanne: Be careful about that. In some jurisdictions, that can open you to liability. I used to work for a lawyer, and I once served some papers to a hairdresser who had done pretty much exactly what you just described doing, as she was being sued by her former employer for essentially poaching their clients. The deal with the law (and you’d want to check if this applies to you) is that if you work as an employee or an independent contractor for a firm, providing a service to clients, even if you have your own “stable” of clients, they’re technically not your clients, they’re the firm’s, so if you tell them you’re leaving and they lose clients, they can sue you.

    My advice to you is: Don’t. At least not until you’re very, very sure the assholes you currently work for can’t sue your ass off if you do.

  116. 116.

    Suzanne

    August 19, 2014 at 10:35 am

    @Interrobang: I’m not going to. However, our clients hire us on a project basis. They can hire another firm for the next project if they want to, and that’s very common. Which is why I’m now being treated like a leper.

  117. 117.

    Elie

    August 19, 2014 at 11:26 am

    You sound good John and I am glad to hear it.

    I will be starting on a new approach to my diet next week…. got really outashape in last two years and I have to change things.

    Am also going to take up meditation… so much of what drags me down is stress..

  118. 118.

    TomPM

    August 19, 2014 at 2:46 pm

    @Pogonip: A kind of pottery in which the piece is removed from the kiln while at its highest heat. robertcomptonpottery.com/Method%20of%20Raku-Firing-Pottery.htm

  119. 119.

    JasperL

    August 19, 2014 at 11:33 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): I use my Fitbit One for cycling all the time – just put it under my biking shorts at the front thigh. It counts a step for each revolution of the pedals, but the calorie burn is close enough for me. Used it tonight and also got 145 ‘floors’ from climbing about 1450 feet during the ride. You can also manually enter a ride – distance and time – and it calculates calories from that.

    I highly recommend the Fitbit or something that tracks elevation. Like others have said, it’s weirdly motivating and addictive for me and my wife. It’s a nice reward I guess for staying active, taking the stairs instead of elevator, etc.

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