Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

The “burn-it-down” people are good with that until they become part of the kindling.

They are lying in pursuit of an agenda.

When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it.

We need to vote them all out and restore sane Democratic government.

People are weird.

No offense, but this thread hasn’t been about you for quite a while.

It’s a good piece. click on over. but then come back!!

Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in morse code.

White supremacy is terrorism.

Humiliatingly small and eclipsed by the derision of millions.

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

Too often we confuse noise with substance. too often we confuse setbacks with defeat.

Well, whatever it is, it’s better than being a Republican.

DeSantis transforming Florida into 1930s Germany with gators and theme parks.

The way to stop violence is to stop manufacturing the hatred that fuels it.

Beware of advice from anyone for whom Democrats are “they” and not “we.”

Thanks to your bullshit, we are now under siege.

Oppose, oppose, oppose. do not congratulate. this is not business as usual.

I’m starting to think Jesus may have made a mistake saving people with no questions asked.

Not rolling over. fuck you, make me.

A tremendous foreign policy asset… to all of our adversaries.

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

Baby steps, because the Republican Party is full of angry babies.

This really is a full service blog.

You are here: Home / Politics / War on Terror / War on Terror aka GSAVE® / He’s Just a Scared and Uptight, Metrosexual, Washingtonian

He’s Just a Scared and Uptight, Metrosexual, Washingtonian

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Simon Maloy takes down Senator Butters:

Sen. Lindsey Graham is terrified. The world as he sees it is just filled to the brim with terrifyingly competent terrorists groups who, without any warning and acting with unchecked efficiency, will make good on whatever threat they issue and waltz unimpeded into the United States and wreak havoc. He describes horrifying scenarios in which untold numbers of American citizens are killed. And Graham helpfully disseminates his disturbing visions of mass slaughter via cable news and the Sunday shows.

This, of course, is precisely the sort of abject terror that groups like the Islamic State do their damnedest to inspire, and Graham is proving himself to be very easily terrorized. In fact, as time goes by, the threat seems to grow in Graham’s mind, and the Islamic State becomes hypothetically capable of killing more and more American citizens, even as intelligence agencies insist that the group poses no immediate threat to the United States.

Here’s Graham on the June 24 edition of Fox News’ “On the Record” talking about the need to take on ISIS. According to Graham, the benefit to confronting the terrorist group was that we would be able to stop the next 9/11. “Do you believe that the people who are shooting folks in the head, killing children in front of their parents, beheading people by the hundreds, if not thousands, would not attack us if they could?” Graham asked.

Sure, that sounds bad, but on the spectrum of things Lindsey Graham is afraid of, “another 9/11” is actually pretty moderate.

In August, Graham was invited to Fox News Sunday to talk terrorism, and upped the Islamic State’s fantasy body count to an entire city’s worth. “When I look at the map that Gen. Keane described, I think of the United States,” Graham said. “I think of an American city in flames because of the terrorists’ ability to operate in Syria and Iraq.”

It goes on like that. And while McCain and Butters are awful, let’s all take a moment to say thank FSM Lieberman is no longer in the Senate.

Reader Interactions

45Comments

  7. 7.

    Violet

    Didn’t he say ISIS was going to come here and “kill us all” or some crap? I wonder how many fainting couches he has in his home? He must need quite a few.

  9. 9.

    gbear

    Someone should convince Graham and McCain that the surest way to wind up on a terrorist hit list is to appear on a television news program.

  13. 13.

    Roger Moore

    “Do you believe that the people who are shooting folks in the head, killing children in front of their parents, beheading people by the hundreds, if not thousands, would not attack us if they could?”

    Even if you believe that, they aren’t here killing us. That should tell you that they lack the capability to do so. It sure as hell doesn’t suggest that we should run around like our hair is on fire, jumping at the first suggestion of what might help. Even if you accept that ISIL is a serious threat, we have time to think things through and come up with a well thought-out strategy for what we’re going to do before they’re capable of carrying through on whatever ill intentions they may have.

  14. 14.

    mdblanche

    Yeah, well you’d always be scared all the time of everything too if you were being bullied by Senator Cartman whenever he needed a target to take out his anger at America on for not electing him president.

    @MikeBoyScout: Too small for a country and too big for an insane asylum…

  15. 15.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    I think Lindsey’s hysterics are meant to promote the idea of total war. If O Mighty ISIS! is indeed an international threat capable wreaking havoc in Beaufort, Peoria and Fresno, what would half a million US troops in the Iraqi/Syrian borderlands do stop that threat?

  19. 19.

    srv

    This could all be fixed very quickly if ISIS would just apply for a NRA Golden Ring of Freedom Membership.

    Surely they have $500K to burn?

  20. 20.

    StringOnAStick

    Seems like ISIS is currently most interested in slaughtering Shiites, and will get around to the West once those apostates are dealt with. It’s a multi-hundred year dream for Sunni’s of the militant sort.

    As for Butters and Johnny RageHead, well, the irony of these big, tough military-loving (yeah, right) senators doing the collective pants-pissing act on TV every chance they get and trying to get all of us to do it too offends me to no end.

  21. 21.

    mai naem

    Gawd, can’t we just somehow get Lindsay in some compromising pics and end his political career. I don’t want him to commit suicide or anything, just allow him to come out,find himself a nice boy(maybe a doctor!) and settle down somewhere nice like San Francisco or Providence. Maybe he can become a decorator and bring some of that Southern flair to some interior designing firm wherever he ends up.

  23. 23.

    max

    “Do you believe that the people who are shooting folks in the head, killing children in front of their parents, beheading people by the hundreds, if not thousands, would not attack us if they could?” Graham asked.

    Sure, if they weren’t too busy shooting everybody they can find in the back of the head. Thank you for calling! ISIS is busy right now, but if you leave a message they can kill you later.

    “I think of an American city in flames because of the terrorists’ ability to operate in Syria and Iraq.”

    How? Do they have the world’s largest Molotov cocktail and a giant catapult?

    let’s all take a moment to say thank FSM Lieberman is no longer in the Senate.

    Yes. The rivers of bonus sanctimony would make me puke.

    max
    [‘All About Lindsay: a tale of personality disorders and repressed lust.’]

  24. 24.

    trollhattan

    @mai naem:
    He and the turtle seem so profoundly unelectable, yet keep gettin’ ‘er done time and time again. Must be impossible to lose a seat on those states.

  26. 26.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    The thing is that even were his fears entirely justified, the notion that raging across the world and bombing people including civilians is a way to decrease the things he’s afraid of, rather than a way to make them far more likely, is just as insane as the overblown fears themselves.

  27. 27.

    trollhattan

    @max:
    They share the same superpowers of those in Gitmo who can never, NEVER be tried in the States, because they’ll fly right out of those courtrooms and begin lasering us with their eyes. Pew-pew-pew

  29. 29.

    Felanius Kootea

    @srv: Ooh – I’m looking forward to that! I didn’t realize he was British for a long time: saw him first in Daddy’s Little Girls – which put me off him for a while, but then I saw him in Guy Ritchie’s RocknRolla and was like “Oh!”

  30. 30.

    Anoniminous

    @efgoldman:

    Wikipedia:

    Graham joined the United States Air Force in 1982, and served on active duty until 1988. Following his departure he stayed in the military, joining the South Carolina Air National Guard and the U.S. Air Force Reserve. During the Gulf War, he was recalled to active duty, serving as a Judge Advocate at McEntire Air National Guard Station in Eastover, South Carolina, where he helped brief departing pilots on the laws of war.

    In 1998, according to the Congressional daily newspaper The Hill, Graham was describing himself on his website as an Operation Desert Shield and Desert Storm veteran. In reality, he never left South Carolina.

    Chickenhawkus maximus

  31. 31.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @efgoldman: @Anoniminous: Huh. I know Americans can serve in the Israeli army (Jeffrey Goldberg can’t be the only one). Could Senator Pittypat maybe volunteer for the Iraqi regular army with all his experience?

    Google suggests it’s legal for Americans to serve in foreign military as long as the country is not at war with US

  32. 32.

    Mike in NC

    @mai naem: Lady Lindsey has been perfecting his hand wringing act for the past four years. The only thing that scares him more than the Mooslem Menace is a bunch of elderly Tea Party fanatics still screaming for Obummer’s birth certificate.

    I’m pretty sure he has a nice gated compound down at Hilton Head where he can retire to with his significant other with all the money he’s scammed in his Senate career. What keeps him in DC?

  35. 35.

    Tommy

    @PurpleGirl: It blows my mind. I often say I am a military brat. I think that framed how I was rasied. I am not fearful of much stuff. I don’t think I am a bad ass, I just refuse to live in fear.

  39. 39.

    elmo

    He wants to do something about roving lawless gangs who go around shooting people in the head? Good. I can’t wait to hear his proposal to reform Missouri law enforcement.

  41. 41.

    danielx

    @Violet:

    Exactly.

    And to put the cherry on top of the sundae, consider this: if it’s all that easy for the bad guys to invade and conquer Des Moines or for that matter East Jesus Tennessee, say, we haven’t exactly gotten a great return for all the money spent and all the rights abandoned and/or trampled in order to “protect” us.

  43. 43.

    MattF

    Yes, this:

    This, of course, is precisely the sort of abject terror that groups like the Islamic State do their damnedest to inspire, and Graham is proving himself to be very easily terrorized.

    Graham is acting like he’s on their payroll. It’s disgusting.

  44. 44.

    SRW1

    “Do you believe that the people who are shooting folks in the head, killing children in front of their parents, beheading people by the hundreds, if not thousands, would not attack us if they could?”

    Ah, now I get it! Graham wants American boots to be put on the ground there so that those people can!

  45. 45.

    JR in WV

    I’m so tired of these R guys being so afraid of everything. Worst case is they pop a vein while trembling on Faux News. Or is that best case?

    Sen. Manchin isn’t afraid, too stupid to imagine anything bad happening to him, ever. He’s a politician, no one can hurt him. Except for that lawsuit his brothers filed on him seeking repayment of the two million dollar loan to keep the family carpet store afloat. That can hurt him. Even for a Senator, $2Million is a lot of cash.

    I remember when he was running for state-wide office for the first time, and bragged about knowing some rich person or other. Which rich successful person then said, “Yes, Mr. Manchin has visited our house – when he came to measure for carpets.”

    Ow! That one hurt!

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