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You are here: Home / Open Threads / Excellent Links / Because I Love You All So Much

Because I Love You All So Much

by John Cole|  September 22, 201411:46 pm| 55 Comments

This post is in: Excellent Links

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I really wish I could describe how much I like this, but here are iconic portraits throughout history recreated with John Malkovich:

Sounds great! Who the fuck is John Malkovich?

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55Comments

  1. 1.

    lamh36

    September 22, 2014 at 11:47 pm

    I saw the pic of Malcovich as John Lennon with Yoko Onon. the naked cover pic…it was pretty disturbing..,lol

  2. 2.

    Grumpy Code Monkey

    September 22, 2014 at 11:50 pm

    Malkovich! Malkovich malkovich, malkovich malkovich malkovich. Malkovich malkovich? Malkovich, malkovich malkovich.

  3. 3.

    John Cole +0

    September 22, 2014 at 11:51 pm

    @Grumpy Code Monkey: Hey- where’s RonnieRoo been? I haven’t seen her round here in forever. Haven’t seen you much, either.

  4. 4.

    Rich Gardner

    September 22, 2014 at 11:55 pm

    “Being John Malkovich” was a cool flick. John Cusack learned how to get into John’s head and become him. Purty strange!

  5. 5.

    eemom

    September 22, 2014 at 11:58 pm

    Always found Malkovitch rather sexy in his younger years.

    And that Being movie was awesome.

    Anyone else ancient enough to remember him as Biff in the 1980s teevee version of Death of A Salesman with Dustin Hoffman?

  6. 6.

    trollhattan

    September 22, 2014 at 11:59 pm

    Holy moly those are awesomely disturbingly awesome. Yikes.

  7. 7.

    Bobby Thomson

    September 22, 2014 at 11:59 pm

    Hey Malkovich! Think fast!

  8. 8.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    September 23, 2014 at 12:00 am

    @Rich Gardner: Hey Malkovich, think fast!

    @Bobby Thomson: Bastard.

  9. 9.

    Tom Q

    September 23, 2014 at 12:02 am

    @eemom: Actually saw them do it on stage. This was about a year after Malkovich had burst on the scene, doing True West with Gary Sinise (they did that on stage, too, but I only saw it on PBS).

    Really thought he was going to follow in the line of Hoffman/Nicholson/Pacino/DeNiro — become a major movie star — but he turned out just a bit too weird for that (as did William Hurt). We never really did get another run of actor/stars like that.

  10. 10.

    burnspbesq

    September 23, 2014 at 12:02 am

    I was about to remark about the fashion ads I’m seeing on the front page, and how great it was that companies are using normal-sized women as models. Then I scrolled down and saw that the ads were for Lane Bryant. So much for that.

    On a much happier note, sometime between now and tomorrow morning a new Eazy Rawlins novel will land in my Kindle app. I do love me some Walter Mosely.

  11. 11.

    lamh36

    September 23, 2014 at 12:02 am

    welp, I’m going to be early.

    good night BJ, time for Golden Girls.

    Golden Girls- Sonny and Cher

  12. 12.

    Mnemosyne

    September 23, 2014 at 12:03 am

    If I ever meet John Malkovich, I will probably tell him that I was one of the kids who would mess around with their stage props in Highland Park until they started locking the door, which would probably lead to him chasing me around the room. If it happens, I promise to have G make a video.

  13. 13.

    burnspbesq

    September 23, 2014 at 12:03 am

    I will always associate Malkovich with “Dangerous Liaisons.” What a sick fuck his character was, and what a great movie that is.

  14. 14.

    JCJ

    September 23, 2014 at 12:04 am

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):

    Good evening sir!

    I think I remember you stating you had played rugby in your college years. On November 1 the US national rugby team will be playing an exhibition against the All Blacks in Soldier Field. Perhaps you are already planning on FreakFest, though.

  15. 15.

    Richard Shindledecker

    September 23, 2014 at 12:05 am

    Wonderful – Thank you.

  16. 16.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    September 23, 2014 at 12:05 am

    @eemom: Just mentioning – for no reason, really – that an ex-girlfriend said that I speak like Malkovich in Dangerous Liaisons. I assume it is the condescension and Mid-West accent.

  17. 17.

    Violet

    September 23, 2014 at 12:06 am

    Sounds great! Who the fuck is John Malkovich?

    Loved that movie. So weird. In a great way. Also loved him in “Dangerous Liaisons.” Creepy.

  18. 18.

    jibeaux

    September 23, 2014 at 12:09 am

    Rarely watch TV, but felt lazy and caught some of the new premieres. Gotham was OK, but the dialogue was hacky. Scorpion was dumb. Forever wasn’t bad. This has been Brief and Not Very Informative Reviews.

  19. 19.

    Mnemosyne

    September 23, 2014 at 12:09 am

    @Bobby Thomson:

    By all accounts, that was ad-libbed (scroll down to #5).

  20. 20.

    Violet

    September 23, 2014 at 12:10 am

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): I’m not sure that’s a good thing.

  21. 21.

    burnspbesq

    September 23, 2014 at 12:12 am

    @jibeaux:

    Season premiere of my one teevee guilty pleasure, “Nashville,” comes up Wednesday night. I say there is no way Rayna is marrying Deacon. It’s either Luke or neither. And I also say that the creepy label head is the one who knocked up Juliette, but Avery will make an honest woman out of her and agree to raise the kid as though he was the father.

  22. 22.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    September 23, 2014 at 12:12 am

    @Violet: Valmont was creepy? Oh, dear. Merteuil was the horrific one, in my view. She was the only one incapable of love. Valmont could do it; he just realized it too late.

    @Violet: I am not sure it was meant as good thing – she was not happy with me at the time she said it.. But as a description of my voice, I can’t say it is wrong.

  23. 23.

    jibeaux

    September 23, 2014 at 12:18 am

    @Tom Q: William hurt is also generally rumored to be an ass. And to have an acting range that runs the gamut from A to B, in my opinion.

  24. 24.

    max

    September 23, 2014 at 12:21 am

    @trollhattan: Holy moly those are awesomely disturbingly awesome. Yikes.

    What? Those are great!

    max
    [‘That was a fabulous Hemingway.’]

  25. 25.

    Violet

    September 23, 2014 at 12:23 am

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): Yes, I think he was creepy for what he did. From a film point of view it was creepy in a good way–he was amazing in the role. But as characters they were both amoral and generally horrible, although Valmont did have that redemption–of a sort–that you mention.

    I love that movie though. The acting was amazing and the story is excellent and they did a wonderful job with the whole production. Glenn Close and John Malkovich were outstanding.

  26. 26.

    Culture of Truth

    September 23, 2014 at 12:23 am

    @eemom: Oh yeah I remember that. I think I know someone who some Hoffman in that in the theatre.

  27. 27.

    Violet

    September 23, 2014 at 12:25 am

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): Do you have a sneer in your voice and does your lip curl up just slightly? There’s no one who pulls that off quite like John Malkovich.

  28. 28.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    September 23, 2014 at 12:28 am

    @Violet: In any case, the comparison was vocal only. Although, given my behavior, the full comparison was not completely off base.

  29. 29.

    eemom

    September 23, 2014 at 12:29 am

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):

    Agreed; Valmont was actually a very nuanced and human character. I loved that scene at the end when he was dying in the snow and told Keanu Reeves to tell de Tourvel that “her love was the only real happiness I have ever known.” [sniff]

    Another good if obscure Malkovich movie of that era: The Sheltering Sky.

  30. 30.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    September 23, 2014 at 12:32 am

    @Violet: Apparently, I can do. Also it is not a sneer. It is a very patient explanation of things that are quite plain to see. The effort to not sneer is often there.

  31. 31.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    September 23, 2014 at 12:35 am

    @eemom: I like The Object of Beauty.

  32. 32.

    eemom

    September 23, 2014 at 12:35 am

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):

    Merteuil was the horrific one, in my view. She was the only one incapable of love.

    She was horrific, but she loved Valmont. Also a nuanced character.

    All in all an excellent film.

  33. 33.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    September 23, 2014 at 12:40 am

    @eemom: Eh, she didn’t love him more than she loved the game. She was bound by her rules and they cost her.

    I am a Valmont guy. The Malcovich vocal comparisons aside, he is the character with whom it is easiest to identify.

  34. 34.

    Steeplejack

    September 23, 2014 at 12:44 am

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):

    Just watched a little bit of Plucking the Daisy. Oof. Frenchmen at their most swinish. It’s supposed to be a comedy, and all I felt was pity for Bardot’s character.

  35. 35.

    Roonieroo

    September 23, 2014 at 12:45 am

    “We are here” yelled the Whos of Whoville. Actually we just got back from Oahu for a truly fantastic vacation. Go Hawaii! I guess we’ve both been busy and get to the threads after they have spun themselves out. I’m consumed with agility training with the pup and Grumpy is grumpy from work overload.

    But we are here biting our nails when Steve escapes and then grateful that he’s returned and we can finally relax.

  36. 36.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    September 23, 2014 at 12:47 am

    @eemom: She was horrific, but she loved Valmont. Also a nuanced character.

    Loved him as much as she could love, but couldn’t let him win, much less love a younger woman. Like Eleanor and Henry in the Lion in Winter. The Milos Forman version (Valmont) is interesting too. Annette Benning’s two best roles are IMHO Merteuil and whatsits in “The Grifters” (and we’ve brought it back to John Cusack). Anjelica Huston’s Lily would eat Close’s Merteuil alive

  37. 37.

    Violet

    September 23, 2014 at 12:48 am

    I also liked Malkovich in “Con Air.”

  38. 38.

    Anne Laurie

    September 23, 2014 at 12:48 am

    @jibeaux:

    Forever wasn’t bad.

    Watched it with the Spousal Unit, who liked it too. Since the two shows we used to watch as-they-aired were Castle and Body of Proof, it’s nice to have the Tuesday slot filled in again.

    (I’m kinda over Castle — last year struck me as far too “fan inspired”, aka pandering to idiots on twitter. But, hey, new season, new hope. )

  39. 39.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    September 23, 2014 at 12:49 am

    Who the fuck is John Malkovich?

    You don’t want to know.

    Right Winger/Glibertarian, now and then of the worst, most nasty kind, at least going by some of the things he’s said.

    http://lmgtfy.com/?q=john+malkovich+conservative

  40. 40.

    Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name)

    September 23, 2014 at 12:50 am

    @Steeplejack: That movie prompted my comment about Bardot in B&W. I tuned out very quickly.

  41. 41.

    Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)

    September 23, 2014 at 12:53 am

    And it’s only 11 days until hockey season starts.

  42. 42.

    Anne Laurie

    September 23, 2014 at 12:54 am

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name): Ugh, I can’t stand Malkovitch’s voice. A fan tried to convince me it was just failed adenoid surgery that accounts for that weird nasal honk, but you’re right, it’s probably just a Midwestern thing.

    (Says the woman who sounds like Heckle & Jeckle even without the Bronx accent of my youth… )

  43. 43.

    Steeplejack

    September 23, 2014 at 12:56 am

    @Anne Laurie:

    Re Castle: can you think of any series that got better after the romantic leads finally “got together”?

  44. 44.

    Violet

    September 23, 2014 at 12:58 am

    @Steeplejack: No, no and no. Although sometimes they can pull off a “get together and then break up” situation.

  45. 45.

    Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)

    September 23, 2014 at 1:12 am

    Seeing Ickey Woods in a Geico commercial is awesome.

  46. 46.

    eemom

    September 23, 2014 at 1:18 am

    @Omnes Omnibus (the first of his name):
    @Anne Laurie:

    I don’t hear Malkovich’s diction as midwestern, or as regional at all. It’s just….precise.

    I can see why some might find it grating, though I don’t. I maintain that he was kinda hot in his younger days.

    @Bill E Pilgrim:

    Very, very sorry to hear that. :(

  47. 47.

    Comrade Colette Collaboratrice

    September 23, 2014 at 1:30 am

    Being John Malkovich was really funny and genuinely strange, but I’m not sure I’ve ever completely recovered from the unexpected and unwelcome sight of Malkovich stark frontal nekkid in Al di là delle nuvole. Yikes. So much better in a dress, disturbing as that is.

  48. 48.

    Fred

    September 23, 2014 at 3:26 am

    “Sheltering Sky”
    Also “RED”. He is really funny.

  49. 49.

    Amir Khalid

    September 23, 2014 at 6:22 am

    I’m quite taken by Malkovich’s Marilyn Monroe photo. He looks very fetching.

    He was indeed hilarious in RED. I saw him in the 2000 French miniseries version of Les Misérables (him as Javert, Depardieu as Valjean, Charlotte Gainsbourg as Fantine). Not among the better adaptations, alas, and the Javert was not his best work either.

  50. 50.

    MattF

    September 23, 2014 at 6:45 am

    That recreation of the Diane Arbus ‘Identical Twins’ photo is very funny and very weird.

  51. 51.

    Cheryl from Maryland

    September 23, 2014 at 8:17 am

    @jibeaux: We decided to stay away from Scorpio, DVR’d Gotham, and watch Forever. Forever is sitting on the fence as to if it gets added to our list — Ioan Gruffudd’s cheekbones and jaw line keeping it in the mix, but it’s like a mashup of Elementary, Castle and Flashforward. Disheartening to hear that it was better than Gotham.

  52. 52.

    rikyrah

    September 23, 2014 at 8:48 am

    @burnspbesq:

    I will always associate Malkovich with “Dangerous Liaisons.” What a sick fuck his character was, and what a great movie that is.

    love him too in this role

  53. 53.

    Ben L

    September 23, 2014 at 9:28 am

    Who the fuck is John Malkovich?

    Seriously?

  54. 54.

    shelley

    September 23, 2014 at 10:08 am

    Kinda wish they hadn’t done the ‘Migrant Mother’ one. Seems almost sacriligous.

  55. 55.

    ASV

    September 23, 2014 at 3:33 pm

    The Einstein one is uncanny. They should start selling it at campus poster sales and see if anyone notices.

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