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You are here: Home / Sports / The Meek Shall Inherit Shit

The Meek Shall Inherit Shit

by John Cole|  September 24, 20147:35 pm| 42 Comments

This post is in: Sports, Our Failed Media Experiment

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ESPN suspended Simmons longer for criticizing Roger Goodell than Goodell suspended Rice for punching his girlfriend http://t.co/KpM16PrSFR

— Judd Legum (@JuddLegum) September 24, 2014

Because the rich and powerful will have curb-jawed them to death:

ESPN pontificator Bill Simmons called NFL commissioner Roger Goodell a liar, and dared his bosses to call him on it.

So they did.

ESPN put out a statement saying Simmons was suspended three weeks for his profane tirade against Goodell.

“Every employee must be accountable to ESPN and those engaged in our editorial operations must also operate within ESPN’s journalistic standards,” the statement read. “We have worked hard to ensure that our recent NFL coverage has met that criteria. Bill Simmons did not meet those obligations in a recent podcast, and as a result we have suspended him for three weeks.”

There’s no word as to whether that suspension is paid or unpaid — such that it matters, since any millions given to Simmons pales to the billions (as in 15.2) they give the NFL.

Look- corporations are free to do with their employees, but all Simmons did was something everyone with an IQ over room temperature agrees with- he stated that Goodell is a fucking liar.

But Disney is very, very protective of their mutually beneficial relationship with the NFL, so he needed to be put in line:

So, what the hell happened here? In the first segment, Polian makes the NFL out to be the East German Stasi, where a low-level executive wouldn’t dare hide pertinent information from his or her superiors for fear of swift and merciless retribution. But then here comes Polian 20 minutes later, describing the NFL offices as a run-of-the-mill bureaucracy where of course vital pieces of information could fall through the cracks.

Bill Polian either has a hard time maintaining consistent opinions for longer than 20 minutes at a time, or something spooked him into softening his answer during that second go-round. If we assume the first answer to be the truest one, you can probably guess what that something might have been.

Nothing to see here. Move along now.

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Reader Interactions

42Comments

  1. 1.

    BGinCHI

    September 24, 2014 at 7:41 pm

    Thank god you will never read about this in a Texas HS history book.

    If people in the past spoke truth to power where would we be?

    Oh, right, part of the British Empire.

  2. 2.

    TaMara (BHF)

    September 24, 2014 at 7:42 pm

    The Meek Shall Inherit Shit

    Well ain’t that the truth. Had a crappy day. Despite excellent credit, pretty decent income and a sizable down payment, no one wants me to spend my money. So the house is going to have to wait. I can’t help but think it has lots to do with single woman business owner that’s the hurdle.

  3. 3.

    Corner Stone

    September 24, 2014 at 7:43 pm

    @BGinCHI: Or a Colorado one, amirite?

  4. 4.

    BGinCHI

    September 24, 2014 at 7:45 pm

    @Corner Stone: Yep. But holy shit have those kids been fighting back!!

    The kids in that school are all right. As though maybe they were learning stuff and then using it. Crazy.

  5. 5.

    The Snarxist Formerly Known as Kryptik

    September 24, 2014 at 7:46 pm

    @BGinCHI:
    @Corner Stone:

    Don’t worry, more states will have the honor of adopting (read:being forced to use) the same curriculum.

  6. 6.

    BGinCHI

    September 24, 2014 at 7:48 pm

    @The Snarxist Formerly Known as Kryptik: Not as long as the students recognize that it’s bullshit. They are already learning more than the right wing asshats want them to forget.

    Thanks for raising the consciousness of the youth, dipshits. Please proceed.

  7. 7.

    TaMara (BHF)

    September 24, 2014 at 7:50 pm

    Jefferson County Students mocking the school board on twitter cheered me up a bit though. I have hope for the future.

  8. 8.

    Violet

    September 24, 2014 at 7:54 pm

    @TaMara (BHF): Well, that’s a bummer. Are there other lenders you could check with? Did you try a credit union?

  9. 9.

    skerry

    September 24, 2014 at 7:55 pm

    @BGinCHI: This is what I saw on my FB feed from a RWNJ “friend” about the Colorado student protest about the censorship:

    This is very enlightening, protests basically about whether or not ‘conservative’ aspects of US History and behaviors should be included in an Advanced History class. The protesters are using their own justified reasonings of ‘censorship’ as a basis of their argument(s). God help us, please!

    Education, what is it?

  10. 10.

    beltane

    September 24, 2014 at 7:56 pm

    A neighbor came by this afternoon with a very cute tortoiseshell kitten he found wandering around by the side of the road. He was wondering if it was ours. Of course, he probably figured it wasn’t ours but that we’d take it in because we already have three cats. It was hard to say no but I think my husband would file for divorce if I brought another animal into the house.

  11. 11.

    Violet

    September 24, 2014 at 7:57 pm

    @TaMara (BHF):
    Wow, check out the pictures of those students. They’re white.

  12. 12.

    BGinCHI

    September 24, 2014 at 8:02 pm

    @skerry: Well, at least they got the correct words that go together into scare quotes.

    Best part of this is the kids outsmarting the adults.

    Got to praise the education system for that one.

  13. 13.

    TaMara (BHF)

    September 24, 2014 at 8:02 pm

    @Violet: This was my third lender…he really went to bat for me and spent a good 10 days working on it. It’s just going to have to wait until spring – they want one more year of my business or a co-signer. It just feels like I did all the right things and still not enough.

  14. 14.

    BGinCHI

    September 24, 2014 at 8:02 pm

    @Violet: Only on the outside.

  15. 15.

    Violet

    September 24, 2014 at 8:03 pm

    @TaMara (BHF): Ugh, that’s a bummer. I’m sorry to hear about that. I hope it works out soon.

  16. 16.

    schrodinger's cat

    September 24, 2014 at 8:04 pm

    Am I the only one here who doesn’t care either about football or the NFL?

  17. 17.

    WereBear

    September 24, 2014 at 8:05 pm

    @TaMara (BHF): WTF!

    It would be hard not to get ballistic under the circumstances.

  18. 18.

    Corner Stone

    September 24, 2014 at 8:05 pm

    @schrodinger’s cat: Yes. Looser.

  19. 19.

    schrodinger's cat

    September 24, 2014 at 8:05 pm

    @beltane: Have you named your new kitteh? We want photos.

  20. 20.

    TaMara (BHF)

    September 24, 2014 at 8:06 pm

    @Violet: People may not realize this, but this is the same school district as Columbine.

  21. 21.

    WereBear

    September 24, 2014 at 8:06 pm

    @schrodinger’s cat: No.

  22. 22.

    beltane

    September 24, 2014 at 8:06 pm

    @schrodinger’s cat: You are not alone.

  23. 23.

    rikyrah

    September 24, 2014 at 8:11 pm

    Nobody thought he wouldn’t be punished.

    No shock here.

  24. 24.

    beltane

    September 24, 2014 at 8:12 pm

    @schrodinger’s cat: We didn’t take her. Judging by the way she was snuggling up to the neighbor I’m figuring he’s the one with the new kitteh. Oh, but she was such a pretty little thing, a lilac colored tortie with a pink nose. The cat trio I have now consist of a laid-back alpha male and two sister cats. While the male would be welcoming, the sisters are cagey enough around each other to make me doubt they’d accept another cat.

  25. 25.

    Jamey

    September 24, 2014 at 8:13 pm

    Simmons is nothing but an Internet tough guy. Olbermann said essentially the same thing last week– that Goodell is a liar. Except he didn’t draw extra attention to himself by calling out his paymaster.

  26. 26.

    ellennellee

    September 24, 2014 at 8:41 pm

    god luv ya, john, so glad you’re back in the saddle and doing so well, and sure am enjoying your invaluable input here. but i have a real bone to pick on this whole NFL thang.

    i see everyone here righteously appalled at the behavior of the players toward women and children, and at least as much the misbehavior of goodell and the whole industrial insanity of ignorance and coverup. appreciate that, and good on ya.

    but honestly, first off, are we really surprised when these same folks ignore these same players who lose all manner of cortical capacity from repeated, brutal concussions? these poor guys are our modern day gladiators, thrown to the lions of senseless, insensitive greed. the fans are entertained by these guys putting – literally – their lives and minds on the line, for …what? so we can hooyah and fist bump? monday morning quarterback? pick the perfect team online? ogle the cheerleaders?

    that NFL concussion scandal has been tossed to the wayside as surely as are the used up players, and it will remain to be seen if mike sam will survive the macho machinery of all these pruney old white (likely impotent) moneybags chewing them up with the sauce du jour, misogyny, homophobia, child abuse, or modern day slavery (take your pick; race card intentional), and then spitting them out.

    the entire enterprise represents just about everything that is WRONG with the world, especially the world run by rich old white (impotent) men. of all people to call the ethical truth here, but george will nailed it when he said football merchandises violence (hard to take seriously from a war monger, but still, he knows of what he speaks). did any of you fans really believe such a violent game would be free of such repugnant behaviors? or can be purged of them?

    given the unlikelihood of the latter, my second question is, how can anyone – youse guys included – continue to watch this stuff like nothing has happened? like none of this has been happening all along? like there is no truth to what it says about the fans as much as the owners?

    we see this sort of thing all the time in our more rightwing feathered friends, and tsk tsk and laugh and mock their hypocrisy. but hey, howdy, folks – here’s a mirror. this is hypocrisy, warts and all.

    until football fans start boycotting the damn game in a huge way none of these utterly insane things will ever stop.

    and getting rid of goodell doesn’t even rise to the level of a bandaid fix. this whole business is just totally f’d up. really really bad f’d up. and fans are as complicit as are the war cheerleaders who sit out invasions on the sidelines.

  27. 27.

    Corner Stone

    September 24, 2014 at 8:42 pm

    I’m not a big fan of Simmons, and I can’t stand to listen to his BS Reports. I wonder if he’s being a canoe on this, or if ESPN is just a scared little rabbit.

  28. 28.

    worn

    September 24, 2014 at 9:16 pm

    Nice Zappa paraphrase, John. Though I’m a fan on the original “nothing” formulation myself…

  29. 29.

    worn

    September 24, 2014 at 9:17 pm

    @schrodinger’s cat: Not at all…

  30. 30.

    schrodinger's cat

    September 24, 2014 at 9:19 pm

    @beltane: She sounds adorable.

  31. 31.

    MoeLarryAndJesus

    September 24, 2014 at 9:26 pm

    Fuck the spineless anonymous suits at ESPN. I’ll miss Simmons’ NFL picks.

  32. 32.

    grandpa john

    September 24, 2014 at 9:26 pm

    @BGinCHI: alll the tweets were good but this one really hit my funny bone

    Lorelei ‏@honest_fangirl 10h
    Roe vs Wade was about the the best way to cross a river. #JeffCoSchoolBoardHistory
    Expand

  33. 33.

    burnspbesq

    September 24, 2014 at 10:00 pm

    Bill Simmons is a dick, and a bad writer who presides over a bad website populated by bad writers.

    He also knows the rules of this game, and chose to flout them.

    He got exactly what he wanted: to be anointed as a martyr by saps like you. He’s no different than Dinesh D’Souza, except that he doesn’t have to spend the next eight months of his life in a halfway house. He played you for fun and profit.

  34. 34.

    GHayduke (formerly lojasmo)

    September 24, 2014 at 10:10 pm

    @schrodinger’s cat:

    I’m with you. No cares given.

  35. 35.

    grillo

    September 24, 2014 at 10:58 pm

    Obligatory (and can’t believe no one beat me to it)

    The Meek Shall Inherit Nothing

  36. 36.

    catclub

    September 24, 2014 at 11:04 pm

    @ellennellee:

    until football fans start boycotting the damn game in a huge way none of these utterly insane things will ever stop.

    Preach it.

  37. 37.

    Tree With Water

    September 24, 2014 at 11:52 pm

    Simmons is Kevin Spacey’s character when he got plugged in his final scene in LA Confidential– he never saw it coming.

    Or maybe Simmons knew perfectly well what he was doing, and still chose to give voice to the gist of what is being said in every bar and church in America about the NFL in general, and Goodell in particular.

  38. 38.

    Gian

    September 25, 2014 at 12:37 am

    @Violet:

    that’s really not a shock. I tend to think white kids who get some education in an all white suburb/rural area are like little Colberts. they just don’t get the racial issues Being sheltered and of general goodwill.

  39. 39.

    Gian

    September 25, 2014 at 12:40 am

    @Tree With Water:

    Simmons either misread ESPN’s corporate take on it. the company has been exposing the (w)holes in the league’s story in a nice polite way at least on the radio shows. Or the use of the f-bomb was enough to get the Disney guys angry.

  40. 40.

    Tree With Water

    September 25, 2014 at 12:42 am

    @burnspbesq: “He’s no different than Dinesh D’Souza..”.

    He sure is. Unlike D’Souza, Simmons not a convicted criminal.

  41. 41.

    Gian

    September 25, 2014 at 12:58 am

    @burnspbesq:

    err whatever:

    This episode has done something unthinkable
    24 hours ago. Simmons is now a sympathetic
    figure. Very few people, least of all me,
    thought ESPN would actually punish Simmons. He said what the likes of Tedy Bruschi, Keith Olbermann, Adam Schefter, Mark Schlereth and several others on ESPN and ESPN.com have said about Goodell, his initial suspension of Rice and the NFL’s handling of domestic violence in general.

    http://www.boston.com/sports/blogs/obnoxiousbostonfan/2014/09/espn_silences_bill_simmons_reminds_us_that_words_mean_far_more_than_deeds.html

    I expect the colorful metaphors are the reason. it’s Disney.

    And what crime is he convicted of? If he’s just like the roots of Obama’s Rage guy he should have a felony conviction or two.

    the whole thing screams publicity stunt to me he’s got a new show about to start.

  42. 42.

    Chet

    September 25, 2014 at 2:46 am

    @ellennellee:

    until football fans start boycotting the damn game in a huge way none of these utterly insane things will ever stop.

    Which I would expect to happen around the Twelfth of Never.

    Seriously, from what I can see football is the spectator-sport equivalent of crack cocaine, for its players and fans alike. I’m glad I never picked up the habit.

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