Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

The line between political reporting and fan fiction continues to blur.

Compromise? There is no middle ground between a firefighter and an arsonist.

New McCarthy, same old McCarthyism.

I’d hate to be the candidate who lost to this guy.

To the privileged, equality seems like oppression.

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

Stamping your little feets and demanding that they see how important you are? Not working anymore.

Not rolling over. fuck you, make me.

Museums are not America’s attic for its racist shit.

Not all heroes wear capes.

Jack be nimble, jack be quick, hurry up and indict this prick.

GOP baffled that ‘we don’t care if you die’ is not a winning slogan.

There are no moderate republicans – only extremists and cowards.

And now I have baud making fun of me. this day can’t get worse.

Bad people in a position to do bad things will do bad things because they are bad people. End of story.

Let the trolls come, and then ignore them. that’s the worst thing you can do to a troll.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

the 10% who apparently lack object permanence

Petty moves from a petty man.

Of course you can have champagne before noon. That’s why orange juice was invented.

Imperialist aggressors must be defeated, or the whole world loses.

Is it irresponsible to speculate? It is irresponsible not to.

Shallow, uninformed, and lacking identity

The arc of the moral universe does not bend itself. it is up to us to bend it.

You are here: Home / Politics / Glibertarianism / Ohh, the Humanity

Ohh, the Humanity

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So the FDA is finalizing rules on calorie counts for foods contained in vending machines, movie theatres, etc., which I think most people would consider either a good thing or no big deal. This, however, has deeply upset the glibertarian sect, and you can read their extended plaintive wail here, but what made me laugh out loud was the closing line:

And one final indignity: Every menu must also include this verbiage: “2,000 calories a day is used for general nutrition advice, but calorie needs vary.”

FSM spare us all from this evil.

BTW, a bonus middle finger to the folks at the NY Times for this headline: “F.D.A. to Require Calorie Count, Even for Popcorn at the Movies.”

Do you have any idea how many calories are in a serving of movie popcorn? I’ll tell you. A shitload:

When we microwave a bag of popcorn at home, calorie counts seem generally reasonable, so we assume that the same deal applies in the theater.

Not so.

We took a look at some of the calorie counts from movie-theater popcorn sold at national theater chains via MyFitnessPal, and the results are pretty shocking. For example, a small popcorn, without butter, from AMC weighs in at 225 calories and 11 grams of fat. Crank it up to a medium and you’re up to about 430 calories and 20 grams of fat. A large AMC popcorn, without butter, contains 1,030 calories and 41 grams of fat.

And you shouldn’t be eating microwave popcorn at home, as many of you informed me last year.

Reader Interactions

98Comments

  1. 1.

    Mnemosyne

    When I leave California, I realize how spoiled we’ve gotten here, because I automatically look at any fast-food or fast-casual (ie Corner Bakery or Panera) menu for the calorie counts, and I’m always a little surprised to go to, say, Arizona and not have those in plain sight. All y’all need to get with the program.

  3. 3.

    Baud

    Compared to Obama’s immigration decision, is this more or less like the internment of Japanese Americans?

  5. 5.

    skerry

    My newly elected county executive (Republican) has announced that his first official act will be to restore soda vending machines in county buildings, including schools. They were banned a couple of years ago after a huge effort by the county PTA, local doctors and health organizations.

  8. 8.

    Xantar

    I thought the point of free markets was to give everybody information so that they can make their own decisions.

  9. 9.

    Mnemosyne

    @trollhattan:

    The other state I mostly go to is Illinois which is civilized and has anti-smoking laws, so it’s not so bad. When we used to have to go to Arizona, though ….

    And, seriously, the last time we went to Vegas (for G’s cousin’s wedding) I could not fucking wait to get out of town. I can’t handle giant clouds of smoke anymore, and the entire Flamingo hotel reeked of 50 years of heavy smoking.

  10. 10.

    Pogonip

    Wait till people learn the horrible truth about taco salads.

    I have found through experimentation, and my doctor confirms it’s true of most people, that as far as weight is concerned, you can eat pretty much anything you want as long as you don’t eat much of it. We’re talking a serving spoonful of something like mac and cheese, itry-bitty desserts, and steaks and chops about a fourth the size of what you’d get in the average restaurant. You can be a little more piggish with fish and you can really pork out on veggies.

  14. 14.

    Belafon

    @Pogonip:

    Wait till people learn the horrible truth about taco salads.

    The way they keep them locked in tiny pens while they are young is inhumane.

  17. 17.

    Mike G

    @Xantar:

    I thought the point of free markets was to give everybody information so that they can make their own decisions.

    The point of Republican “free markets” is for Republican businessmen to make as much money as possible, through exploitation, deception or whatever, with no interference from government.

  19. 19.

    The Dangerman

    Anybody try bulletproof coffee? The long promised book by the Bulletproof founder (blanking on his name tonight) is finally hitting the bookstores Tuesday. As someone that typically has NO interest in breakfast beyond a cup of caffeine, I’m thinking about it.

  22. 22.

    Amir Khalid

    @Pogonip:
    How much is a proper serving? The answer varies. When my cousin’s husband (the franchise-holder in Malaysia of a major American fast-food chain) ran an Arab restaurant, he found that Arab tourists’ idea of a serving (ETA: for one person) would be enough for a Malaysian family of four.

  27. 27.

    jl

    @Baud:

    ” I don’t eat popcorn, but I had heard that unbuttered, unsalted popcorn was really low calorie.”

    Listen young man, you eat your (unbuttered,and low salt) popcorn. It is good and good for you too.

    You throw a little of whatever stuff in you think will taste good with it, just enough to coat it, and mix it up and eat it. Yum yum.

    Except I guess if you think wine or fine whisky is good with popcorn, probably don’t mix those together.

  28. 28.

    Tree With Water

    @GregB: Yeah, really.

    “And you shouldn’t be eating microwave popcorn at home, as many of you informed me last year”.

    Why the hell not?

  29. 29.

    skerry

    I missed it, but CNN aired about 10 seconds live of New Yorkers shouting “Fuck CNN”. I’m sure there’s video out there somewhere. Ha!

  32. 32.

    Suzanne

    @Mnemosyne: Some restaurants in AZ have the calorie counts. I hate Panera, so I can’t testify to that one.

    I really only go to independent restaurants or small chains, as a rule though, and those aren’t required to have calorie counts anywhere, to the best of my knowledge.

  33. 33.

    skerry

    In food news, I am flying tomorrow to Brownsville, TX to spend the holiday with the parents who winter on South Padre Island. My dad informed me that our first meal will be at a Chinese restaurant. What?! My mother wants Chinese food. This is what early onset dementia will do you to, folks.

  34. 34.

    jl

    @FlyingToaster:

    ” So what’s the calorie count of deer jerky? Which seems to be the most searched-for recipe in WV, according to the NYT. ”

    But how did those W By God V’s come by that deer? They hunt it themselves or they find it by the road? That is what would worry me about anything produced with that recipe.

    But, thanks for link. I see Californians and Hoosiers have love of persimmons in common. That is at least one thing. And the link notes that sweet ‘taters are high in CA search lists.

    Don’t nobody say CA is unAmerican and snooty. How more American can you get than persimmons (even if it’s impossible to get native persimmons in the store) and sweet ‘taters?

  36. 36.

    beltane

    Chain restaurants in Vermont have had to display calorie counts for a few years now. It’s really not the end of the world.

  37. 37.

    esc

    I saw a commercial for what appeared to be a pizza with Cheddar sauce instead of tomato sauce (though I admit I’ve had a lot of cold medicine). I wonder if knowing the certainly astronomical calorie count would deter someone who would even consider something like that in the first place.

  38. 38.

    jl

    @skerry:

    ” I missed it, but CNN aired about 10 seconds live of New Yorkers shouting “Fuck CNN”. I’m sure there’s video out there somewhere. Ha! ”

    Hell, I’d watch a news feature on that on CNN. Don Lemon would be good to do the analysis. Or some other goofy CNN anchor. Whoever… they would do great…

  39. 39.

    Suzanne

    I thought we decided yesterday that it’s actually called “West by God butt fuk Virginia”, at least according to our resident troll.

  41. 41.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Mnemosyne:

    I recently did one of those how-many-states-have-you-been-to? quizzes on Facebook, and Nevada was among the very few that I have never set foot in. And smoking is one big reason why I probably never will. I used to have to attend conventions in Biloxi and similar çäšîñø-heavy places, and even though they’re not as venerable as Vegas, they still reek of stale smoke. Ugh, no thanks.

  43. 43.

    JGabriel

    @Xantar:

    I thought the point of free markets was to give everybody information so that they can make their own decisions.

    See, that’s where you made your mistake. From the conservative / libertarian point of view, the point of markets is to hide, or lie about, any information that might cause you to rethink a purchasing or other spending decision.

  44. 44.

    jl

    @skerry: Well, give it a shot, see what it is. Maybe it’s Tex-Mex Chinese. I ate at a Cajun-Vietnamese restaurant in New Orleans once, run by a Vietnamese couple who really know how to mix and match. It was good.

    Edit: and they were a little crazy. I think that helped.

  45. 45.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @jl:

    But how did those W By God V’s come by that deer? They hunt it themselves or they find it by the road?

    How many West Virginians does it take to eat a deer? Three, one to eat and two to watch oncoming cars.

    I’ll throw myself out, thank you.

  46. 46.

    jl

    @JGabriel: Nerd note: officially, when you write down the theory on paper to prove Deep Welfare Theorems on Wonderfulness of Free Markets, you have to assume all the information you need is already there… for free.

    Wait… what….?

  50. 50.

    skerry

    @Suzanne: That could be fun, but knowing my mother this is probably bland Americanized Chinese. If we’re really lucky, it could have a buffet. She loves buffets.

  51. 51.

    PurpleGirl

    @esc: That’s Little Ceasar’s with buttered pretzel crust, cheddar cheese sauce, pepperone and 3 types of cheese sprinkled on top. Doesn’t interest me at all.

  55. 55.

    raven

    @Baud: Bitches is all these people.

    Nutritional yeast.

    Ok, don’t freak out. I know only sounds like The Most Unappetizing Name In The History Of Food. But “nooch” (as we prefer to call it) is an absolute rockstar of an ingredient.

    You can buy it in the health food section of most stores, either in a container like this or in bulk. And as you can see, it’s basically just a zillion yellow flakes (or some brands are more powdery) made from deactivated yeast. People love it because it’s vegan, it’s dairy-free, it’s gluten-free (double-check specific brands for certification), it’s packed with a bunch of vitamins (especially B-vitamins, folic acid, selenium, zinc and protein), it’s low-fat, and it contains no added sugars or preservatives.

    But the real reason to try nutritional yeast is because of the flavor. It’s hard to describe, but I give it a cross between nutty, cheesy, a little salty, and deliciously savory. You can use it to help flavor all sorts of foods, but it’s especially fantastic on popcorn.

    gimmesomeoven.com/best-butter-free-popcorn-nooch-popcorn/

  56. 56.

    mai naem mobile

    I bought some new silverware the other day. I still haven’t opened it to compare but it sure looks bigger than my old set and i felt my older set was a little bigger than the previous set. The new spoons to me look just a little smaller than smaller serving spoons. I know bowls and dishes are bigger but spoons too now?

  58. 58.

    jl

    @raven: I assume a little goes a long way? If so, I might try it. What are the unpleasant gastric consequences? I assume that there must be some. Link doesn’t mention anything, but I am sure they are hiding something.

  69. 69.

    Pogonip

    @raven: I’m going to get some and try it on my mother. She’s senile and it’s a battle to get her to eat. In fact she’s in a rehab home right now because she was becoming malnourished. They can plausibly threaten her with a feeding tube ( it’s working; she’s senile, not stupid)

  74. 74.

    Slaughter

    @Mnemosyne: Where do you go in Arizona that has a lot of smoking? It’s banned in virtually all restaurants and bars. Back in my native Pennsylvania, though, I went to one bar and left reeking of smoke.

  76. 76.

    John Revolta

    Goddamn.

    For comparison, a double quarter-pounder with cheese has 42 grams of fat. And way less calories, also too.

  78. 78.

    Mnemosyne

    @Slaughter:

    Sorry, I think the way I answered was confusing — I was talking about the lack of calorie counts in the restaurants in Arizona (at least as of a couple of years ago), not the smoking. Smoking was a different topic.

    ETA: One place with plenty of smoke — the bingo place my mom would take me to. Fort McDowell. But, again, I haven’t been there in several years.

  79. 79.

    ? Martin

    1000 calories isn’t as much as I thought. The chain restaurants near me all have at least one 2000-3000 calorie item on the menu.

    But the calorie counts have been a godsend for me. I’ve dropped 25% of my peak weight and I had a totally distorted sense of what are the low and high calorie items, and by how much. I regularly come in at 1200 calories or less per day, but that’s totally doable with an In-N-Out cheeseburger and unsweetened ice tea, just leave out the fries or share them with a few others.

  81. 81.

    wasabi gasp

    @mai naem mobile: Back in the day, my grandfather milled down a few pieces of silverware to be just to his liking. As a kid, I thought it was strange, but I’ve come to respect his peculiarity. I still have some of his pieces and, without knowing any of this backstory, my girlfriend gravitated to one of his spoons and has essentially made it hers.

    Even I have become something of a collector of teaspoons. There’s an assortment of teaspoons from many different sets in the drawer. One particular spoon I reach for when eating a bowl ice cream. Peculiar, but best tool for the job.

  86. 86.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @wasabi gasp: One of my grandfathers was a master machinist. When he worked with brass, bronze, or anything other than steel, he cleaned the shop and collected the shavings. Scrap metal people bought it.

  88. 88.

    wasabi gasp

    @Omnes Omnibus: I honestly don’t know what he did with the shavings – I was very young – but I do remember the machines constantly covered with dust and shavings, so I doubt he did much sorting.

  89. 89.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @wasabi gasp: Whe I was a kid, my grand father would save the expensive shavings. He would put hem aside and when I would come to visit, we would take them to a scrap metal dealer, and he would give me the takings. Being the first grandchild is not a bad thing. Being willing to work in his little shop isn’t a bad thing either. I can still use a micrometer. I can also do a lot of shit with old fashioned lathes, drill presses, and grinders. The modern shit? No clue.

  90. 90.

    wasabi gasp

    @Omnes Omnibus: I did enjoy being by his side as he worked. We lived next door to each other, so the “me” time was somewhat more random. I know how to watch Bonanza.

  91. 91.

    Citizen_X

    @skerry: If you’re still around: as of ~6 years ago, Brownsville had lots of good norteno-style taco places, where you can meal of ~6 tacos (they’re small) that are cheap, fresh, and (I think, depending on your ingredients) healthy.

    Also, there’s a seafood shack at the south end of Padre (right out side of the state park entrance) that has awesome fried shrimp.

    You’re on your own trying to get your mom to those, though

  92. 92.

    Bitter Scribe

    These rules actually came out surprisingly strict. They include things like alcohol and locations like amusement parks and ballgames.

    Good. I hope Obama pushes the limit on this stuff for the next two years.

  93. 93.

    Gian

    @Baud:
    I really should read down. but air-popped popcorn is high fiber low cal. other than getting under your gums in your mouth, it’s a good snack, even if you add reasonable things (say a tablespoon of butter to a quart) to it

    the thing is popping it in crappy oils and overusing the oils so the stuff soaks in them

  94. 94.

    dance around in your bones

    When I was a kid, my mom used to make a double load of popcorn, throw it in a grocery bag, and put a full stick of butter in it, with salt. Then shake it around; then take it to the drive-in with my dad and mom and four kids.

    It was SO damned delicious! And not a single one of us ever got fat.

    She also used to make ‘donuts’ from those crack em open tubes of biscuits on Sundays – she’d cut them in half, throw them in hot oil and fry them until they were golden and puffy. – then shake them in a bag with either powdered sugar, or sugar and cinnamon.

    None of us EVER got fat. Frankly, I never KNEW a fat person in my childhood, Funny how that is,, hunh? I guess high fructose corn syrup and shit like that hadn’t been ‘processed’ yet..

    We even ate ‘Lotta burgers’ ! – biggest burgers I ever saw!! But not that often, as well as the A&W ‘Papa, Mama, Teen burgers and child burgers,,,,generally WITH a Root Beer Float. That had a scoop of ice cream in it.

    I just say this to tell folks that y’all can eat what you want – only in small portions and only once in a while – it was a treat for us!

  95. 95.

    Bonnie

    I still make my own popcorn with my air popcorn popper. Sometimes I had butter sometimes not. Couldn’t live without popcorn; and, the hot air poppers were the best invention.

  96. 96.

    ruemara

    @esc: I make a fantastic beer, cheddar and potato pizza, both vegan & non-vegan options. Fucks are usually not given when in proximity to all that cheese.

  97. 97.

    Morzer

    Glibertarians as usual advocating freedom to swindle and harm for corporate persons, for the rest of us, nothing.

  98. 98.

    RSA

    @Xantar:

    I thought the point of free markets was to give everybody information so that they can make their own decisions.

    In addition to the snarky-but-true responses above, I think that a libertarian might say that customers will base their choices on the presence or absence of such information, and if enough customers want it, then restaurants will start doing putting it out there, without being coerced. Of course, these libertarians have developed their normative theories of human behavior without considering anything we know about actual human beings.

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