The man who gave the world Nutella has passed on to the big store shelf in the sky.
RIP Michele Ferrero.
Open Thread.
by Zandar| 111 Comments
This post is in: KULCHA!, Open Threads
The man who gave the world Nutella has passed on to the big store shelf in the sky.
RIP Michele Ferrero.
Open Thread.
Comments are closed.
Spinwheel
If you can’t win the argument, post an open thread over it.
Shitbag.
Baud
So that’s what your troll looks like. I pictured someone much younger and less good looking.
Southern Beale
I hope his passing was smooth and sweet, with perhaps a slightly nutty taste.
Rob in CT
@Spinwheel:
You really have no idea how utterly pathetic you are, do you?
Violet
I love Nutella. Have tried substitutes and there are none. Justin’s used to be okay but they changed the recipe and now it’s just gross.
RIP and thanks for leaving such a delicious legacy.
Amir Khalid
I’ve always wondered: should it be pronounced Nut-ella or Noo-tella? I know the latter is the standard, but being aware that it’s made with hazelnuts has always made me feel it should be the former.
Baud
@Amir Khalid:
I’ve always used the former.
Gin & Tonic
@Amir Khalid: I think you should learn Italian next, and answer your own question.
Tissue Thin Pseudonym
I’m employed! I’m fucking employed!
How is it conceivably possible that one can unsuccessfully look for work for seven years with thousands of applications and then get two job offers on the same goddamned day? For two positions that were absolutely and utterly unlike.
One was the job in LaCrosse: working on an unclaimed property audit. The upside was that it is in my field and so it could lead to other, better opportunities and that it pays $24/hour. The downside: it’s temporary, so I would need to look for work again in 6-12 months; it means living in LaCrosse and away from my cats five days a week; and the people I’d be working for have come across as clueless nitwits over the five months since I first applied.
The other is a security guard job in Maple Grove, 20 minutes from home. The downside is that it’s a dead end job that wouldn’t lead anywhere and it pays $14/hour instead of $24. The upside: it’s permanent, so I don’t have to go back into the hell of unemployment if I don’t want to; it doesn’t involve living in LaCrosse at all; and it turns out that it’s not just a security guard job but rather the perfect security guard job for me. It involves sitting by yourself in an office with monitors of various facilities and dealing with alarms at the entrances to two (soon to be four) secure rooms, making sure you don’t screw any of them up, and fully documenting each incident so that when the Department of Energy audits the records they understand exactly what happened. It also involves contractors calling to be admitted to facilities and buzzing them in if they have authorization, but that’s actually the minor, though more frequent, part of the job. The main alarm apparently only goes off 5-7 times a month, but it’s so important not to screw it up that they are willing to pay decently to make sure that they have someone reliable and dedicated to deal with each one. And they recognize that you can’t have someone smart, reliable and dedicated who does nothing for 90-95% of his shift and then tell them that they have to just stare at the monitors the whole time. They say to bring in your laptop or your books and keep yourself amused and engaged while you’re there, so there is lots of acknowledged time to read and write.
You might be able to guess from the lengths of those two paragraphs that I’ve chosen the security position. It probably means that I never will go into accounting, but I’m okay with that. The security, the stability, and the opportunity to get paid while I further my writing career are all worth it.
Through all of this, I never thought that I would actually find myself writing an email telling someone that I am declining their offer of a job that I would have accepted in a vacuum. It felt really weird, but also really good.
Baud
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
Congrats. Hope this means you get to relax for a while. You’ve put in your dues. That’s a long time to be out of work.
SiubhanDuinne
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
I am very happy for you! It really sounds like a perfect fit. This has been a long, hard slog and I’m thrilled that there is a happy ending. Congratulations!
Edit: Thanks for fixing the italics.
burnspbesq
If you didn’t think you would live long enough to see an openly gay person wave the green flag at the Daytona 500, you were wrong.
http://espn.go.com/racing/nascar/cup/story/_/id/12329609/abby-wambach-serve-honorary-starter-daytona-500
Gin & Tonic
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Congratulations. I’ve seen some of how difficult this time has been for you.
FWIW, a few of the security guards who work at my facility are also intelligent, accomplished people who use their “downtime” for interesting things. So it’s only as “dead-end” as you make it.
Baud
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
And for Balloon Juice!
beltane
@Amir Khalid: In Italian, Nu=Noo.
Pogonip
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Congrats! Now you can work on your book while guarding!
The guard job, while it pays less, is likely to be around longer. The accounting job will probably be done by someone in China or India within the next 5 years.
Violet
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Congratulations! Maybe the security job will give you the security (ha ha) you need to focus on your writing and you’ll end up being a writer. Or maybe the company has other opportunities, including something related to accounting, that you’d be eligible to apply for at some point down the road.
Amir Khalid
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
Congratulations. I think we’re all aware how hard your unemployment these past few years has been on your spirits. Here’s hoping it’s a sign of better things to come.
Pogonip
Obligatory weather remark: 5 degrees here.
Yesterday bayourenaissanceman.blogspot.com posted something that made me laugh out loud, a picture of a wolf captioned: “The groundhog predicted six more weeks of winter. So I ate him.”
beltane
This is just bizarre: http://www.newsweek.com/martin-luther-playmobil-toy-sells-out-germany-following-record-breaking-demand-306329 Who would have thought that there would be such a big demand for Martin Luther figurines in 2015.
JPL
Am I the only person on the blog, that hasn’t tried nutellla?
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Great news!
Punchy
@burnspbesq: But gay chicks aren’t the icky kind, so they’re OK. In fact, they’re the hot girl-on-girl kind, just needing that good Southern gentleman to join in and show ’em a thing or two.
Let me know when an openly gay MAN in an official D500 capacity is allowed within 500 yards of that place….
Woodrowfan
TTP: well [email protected]!
Roger Moore
@Amir Khalid:
The company says you’re supposed to prounounce it “new-tell-uh”. It’s part of the first answer in their FAQ.
ShadeTail
@JPL: Nope, I’ve never tried it either. I’ve considered it from time to time, but I just never saw the point.
Roger Moore
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
I blame Obama.
Botsplainer
@Spinwheel:
Psycho head case.
Amir Khalid
@Roger Moore:
I’m a bit suspicious of that pronunciation, since it comes from the US office.
JCJ
@beltane:
Maybe they want to buy them now and sell them for souvenirs in 2017?
JCJ
@Amir Khalid:
I first learned of Nutella in Germany, so I have always said new-tella. Thanks. Now I will stay up all night trying to decide which is correct. I liked the suggestion that you learn Italian next. Seems the best solution.
chopper
@Spinwheel:
the sad thing is, there are people out there who are literally starving right now, yet you get to eat.
beltane
@JCJ: That would make sense, though they would be more expensive/higher quality than is usual for such souvenirs. Perhaps Playmobile will follow up with a release of Pope Leo figurines.
greennotGreen
Congratulations to TTP!
I’ll be retiring in a few months, and I encourage anyone else of close to retirement age to consider it to open up positions for younger people. Of course, in my line of work there are people who would rather do research than eat, so we have some people wandering around in the corridors who look like they’ve mistaken the lab for a room at Shady Acres. As long as the mind is good, they can still make contributions – I just hope they aren’t taking paychecks that could start a young family.
More importantly, Nutella. I don’t know that I’d ever had it till a cousin turned me on to crepes filled with Nutella and bananas. It is awesome!
Alex S.
@Punchy:
Yep, same thing in tennis, or soccer.
Amir Khalid
@JCJ:
I’d only say it that way if it were spelled “Nütella”. The pronunciation common in Malaysia follows the Italian “Noo-tell-ah”.
gocart mozart
The Italians pronounce it new-tell-uh, so go with that.
elmo
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
Many, many congratulations. And security does not have to be a dead end, not at all. Especially if you’re at a DOE facility.
With three years of security experience, clean credit, and a modest level of physical fitness, there are security jobs that pay upwards of $20-22 an hour plus benefits, plus overtime.
Amir Khalid
@Roger Moore:
Reading further down that FAQ, I’m intrigued to learn that the palm oil used to make Nutella is all sourced from plantations in Malaysia to ensure sustainability.
elmo
@elmo:
Oh yeah – and plus, they’re unionized.
gogol's wife
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
Congratulations! I am so happy to hear this.
Bobby B.
@Amir Khalid: Malaysia uses female prison workers in plantations. They wear cutoffs and halter tops and frequently get into fights in the mud. I seen a movie about it.
OzarkHillbilly
@JPL: Never gone near the stuff myself.
ShadeTail
@Rob in CT:
@chopper:
For goodness sake, fellows, please don’t feed the troll. Zandar managed to ignore it, so you can too.
Roger Moore
@Amir Khalid:
I disagree. I think the US is a good place to get pronunciation advice precisely because Americans are more likely to need it.
raven
Mike Ehrmantraut from Breaking Bad is a parking lot checkout guy in Better Call Saul so there is mobility in static positions. Do they supply ammo?
raven
@JPL: I don’t mess with it. Is it like Vegimite?
Buddy H
I thought I was losing my sense of humor, because for a few years I’d watch SNL sketches and not crack a smile. Then I watched Key & Peele’s first season, and laughed my ass off. Inside Amy Schumer gives me a laugh sometimes as well.
I didn’t watch the 40th SNL, but we just watched the Celebrity Jeopardy sketch, and I found if painful.
I’m old enough to remember seeing the original SNL cast live, before SNL. We went to National Lampoon’s Lemmings, a live show with Chevy, Jane, Belushi, and some Lampoon people. This was in the early ’70s before their national fame.
George Carlin didn’t have a good experience with SNL. In his autobiography (written with Tony Hendra) he calls Lorne Michaels a “c****ker” He didn’t have much good to say about Billy Crystal, either.
kc
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
Congrats!
That security guard job sounds awesome. Are there, um, any other openings there?
piratedan
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: congrats sir, I hope that the job helps keep a roof over your head, food on your table and kibble in your cats bowls and allows you to feed that inner part of you the yearns to create.
ruemara
Not for the first time in the past 3 months, but can I get an assistant editor that knows how to edit? Basic, like, most basic knowledge of AP & AE linking would be awesome.
I’m doing a lot of teaching or do it myselfing with two aides that are not trained.
piratedan
@Buddy H: people is people and even folks that I like and respect that intersect in my circle don’t always get along because of reasons….
JPL
@raven: I’ve actually tried vegimite. A friend from Australia thought it was a cure all. It was awful.
Buddy H
@piratedan: Very true.
Belafon
@ShadeTail: I’m kind of curious about the guy. It’s obvious he went with cable instead of DirecTv. But to just sit around and wait until Zandar posts. Someone could probably earn their PhD explaining this behavior.
boatboy_srq
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: CONGRATS!
Violet
@raven: If you like chocolate, you’ll probably like Nutella. If you like hazelnuts but not chocolate you probably won’t like Nutella. If you like chocolate and hazelnuts, you’ll love Nutella.
I can’t keep it in the house because I’ll eat it with a spoon straight out of the jar.
Tenar Darell
I can’t have Nutella in the house. I have no self control around its yumminess. Of course, if someone I know bakes or frosts with it, or has it at brunch, I’m very happy to eat up half their supply. Thank you Michele Ferrero, go forth to with your heavenly chocolate.
Tenar Darell
@Violet: I swear, I did not read your comment before I posted. Really!
Violet
@Tenar Darell: Great minds! And great Nutella!
Xenos
I understand the palm oil they use in Nutella is not that good for you, and that a lot of rain forest has been cut down for the palm oil plantations to make it. Delhaize/Food Lion has a similar spread that uses healthier oil, but I have not tried it. Kids accept no imitations.
Gin & Tonic
@raven: It’s the opposite. Nutella is edible, Vegemite isn’t.
SiubhanDuinne
@raven:
@JPL:
I much prefer Marmite* to Vegemite, and for a sweet spread, give me the Biscoff (creamy or crunchy) every time! I know Trader Joe’s also has something similar that some folks here are crazy about, but the Biscoff is so good, I figure why mess with success?
*Marmite is wonderful spread on buttered toast, although I can’t slather it on too lavishly. A little goes a very long way. But it is tasty!
Tree With Water
I’d never even heard of Nutella until pop-up ads for it began to recently intrude on another website I peruse. It looks absolutely horrible.
JustRuss
When I was bike touring in the Netherlands, Nutella was a staple at every B&B we stayed at. We referred to it as “frosting”, although I suppose it’s slightly healthier. Darn yummy.
Violet
@Tree With Water: Why do you say it looks horrible?
boatboy_srq
@ShadeTail: @raven: For some reason, my eyes crossed reading your two comments, and I wound up with an image of a troll that tastes like Vegemite – and now I need brain bleach.
Debbie
a little Nutella on a graham cracker: Yum!
gogol's wife
@raven:
No, no, no. It’s a delicious blend of chocolate and hazelnuts. It kept me spiritually alive through a Moscow winter (I could buy it at the American embassy supermarket).
ETA: Vegemite is heinous!
Kathleen
Have any Nutella fans had a Nutella Croissant? Truly yummy.
Kathleen
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Congratulations to you! Very inspiring to me.
WereBear
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: That is awesome news!
As a fellow writer I agree with your choice. :)
Amir Khalid
@Xenos:
People here have been cooking (and baking, and doing other food-related things) with palm oil for generations. I doubt that it is significantly worse or better for you than any other vegetable oil, whatever the competitors of palm oil producers or their paid shills may say.
ruemara
I’m a party pooper. I like Panda better. Nutella is now mainly powered sugar, hazelnut flavor and oil. As the ingredients got poorer in quality, it got more popular. /food snob
There’s a good recipe for homemade but it really depends on patience and a quality food processor.
raven
oh
Tree With Water
@Violet: It looks like chocolate syrup. To pour it on anything seems sort of revolting. It brings to mind the scene in To Kill A Mockingbird, when Scout laughs at the kid who poured syrup over his entire meal. I’m with Scout where Nutella is concerned- what in the Sam Hill are you doing?
Amir Khalid
Off-topic (or at least off the topic of chocolate/hazelnut spread) the Washington Post reports that the Obama-Bibi tiff is getting a bit tiffier.
Tommy
Strange as it might sound, never had Nutella. Not even licked a knife/spoon. If I want to spread something it is butter, hummus, and peanut butter (in about that order). I recall the first time I found humus about 15 years ago. It blew my mind somehow I got to be around 30 and had never had it. And peanut butter. Oh peanut butter how I flat out love you. You’ve been my friend since before I have memories!
I’d say 80% of my breakfasts (and also snacks) are a half everything bagel, toasted, light spread of peanut butter (or hummus included in the 80%), and either V8 juice with some Tobasco, and whatever fruit is in house.
But with that said, I know more than a few people that might end their lives (in not really I guess) without Nutella.
BTW: totally forgot today was a Federal holiday. All the projects I am working are for clients not at work today. Strangely getting a free day to clean and do little things around the house that don’t “need” to be done but “should” be done has been far more enjoyable than I would have imagined. Off to unload he dishwasher and reorganize a couple kitchen cabinets.
Amir Khalid
@Tree With Water:
It’s a spread. It isn’t chocolate syrup. You don’t pour it on your food. You spread it on bread and stuff like that. (I understand that unsweetened chocolate is a common savoury ingredient in Latin American cuisine.)
CrustyDem
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
Congrats! I know it’s been a long road and it’s definitely wise to choose the stable job. Good luck!
gvg
@Tree With Water: It’s a spread, like peanut butter. Not pourable. I haven’t tried it but my Mom loves it. I would imagine it enhances some foods and is not a match for others. In fact people do seem to use it like peanut butter. It doesn’t seem horrible to me, just not enticing. Hazlenuts are not that different than other nuts to me. I’d rather have plain dark chocolate actually
raven
@Amir Khalid: It’a all over Trader Joe’s.
Gin & Tonic
@Amir Khalid: “Chocolate” is, in fact, derived from a Nahuatl word.
CaseyL
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: That is wonderful! Congrats are in order.
Absolutely take the job you’ll be most comfortable in and enjoy. I spent a long time chasing high-paying jobs which 99% of the time turned out to be hellish.
I hope this one is as good a fit as it seems to be.
@Violet: @Tenar Darell: I had to take a jar of Nutella in to work after I started eating it with a spoon. I put a little sign on the jar “Save Me From Myself! Eat this!”
Howard Beale IV
@JPL:
(raises hand)
WereBear
@Xenos: The entire outlook on healthy fats is undergoing a radical reappraisal. The original research was deeply flawed.
Elizabelle
@Baud: Looks like Marty Feldman’s beloved gramma.
Violet
@Tree With Water: It’s not a syrup. It’s a spread. Like peanut butter.
Woodrowfan
@raven:
sounds messy..
Elizabelle
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Yippee! So happy for you.
You just obtained a writing office with monitors and someone else paying the utilities. And maybe you’ll find some smart and funny people at work.
I think you made a good choice.
Go buy some Nutella to celebrate!
Woodrowfan
Is there Nutella that diabetics and those with hypoglycemia can have??
Josie
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Congratulations! You should feel so proud that your hard work in job hunting has finally paid off. I think you made a really smart choice, since the job fits what other things you want to accomplish. Best of luck with everything.
tesslibrarian
Richest cookies I ever made were shortbread thumbprint cookies that I filled with Nutella instead of jam.
They were amazing.
trollhattan
@Woodrowfan:
Impossible to imagine, since it’s basically spreadable candy bar. In fact, a friend once brought back a big ol’ jar of a competing product from his Germany trip–spreadable Milky Way. Had to see it to believe it.
Woodrowfan
@trollhattan: that’s what I thought. will discrimination against the sugar-challenged never end??? (sigh)
gelfling545
@Violet: I have learned not to buy it and a bag of pretzels at the same time because suddenly, ooops! Where’s they go?
Roger Moore
@ruemara:
I think you have cause and effect backward. As the popularity went up, they had to compromise on the quality of their ingredients to keep up with demand. It’s a very common problem.
Ruckus
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
Congrats!
Having read your posts about being unemployed for, well what probably seems like forever, my year off pales in comparison. But that was enough of a sample to have the understanding that unemployment sucks. Hope you enjoy working and that you are able to write as much as you want.
boatboy_srq
@Woodrowfan: There ARE a few chocolatiers that delve into the sweet-without-sucrose realm. Precious few, though. Most makers these days are too busy getting gluten and fats-as-defined-by-FDA out of their products to worry about a simple thing like sugars.
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: That’s great news!
Ruckus
Haven’t had and Nutella in years so can’t speak to the quality. But thinking this is anything but heaven in a jar just doesn’t make any sense. My problem is like several others here, if it’s in the house it’s never here for long. One jar is worth 3-5 lbs more of me and that only takes a couple of days.
ETA I’ve only heard it pronounced Nu-tell-a, or for those of you with a more sophisticated voice Noo-tell-a.
TooManyJens
Anti-fans of McMegan might be amused by this video about the Thermomix:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4yr_etbfZtQ
TooManyJens
And now, having read through the thread, I also want to add my congratulations to TTP!
Mnemosyne (iPad Mini)
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
The security guard position is only a dead-end job if you really aspire to work in accounting. If you’d rather pursue writing — where you’ve already been having some success — then the security guard job is far more suitable so you can have a steady income while you work on your writing. I think you made the right decision.
Mnemosyne (iPad Mini)
@Woodrowfan:
The only solution is to buy high-end candy, like See’s:
http://www.sees.com/Cat.cfm/Sugar_Free
It’s a sacrifice, but it’s just one you’ll have to live with. ;-)
JustRuss
@trollhattan:
Forgot all about that, I found it when I visited Germany 30 years ago, and brought a couple jars back with me. Glad to know it still exists.
Steeplejack
The snow has started a little earlier than I expected here in NoVA, which is slightly worrisome. It’s coming down fairly hard and it’s sticking. I’m girding my loins to go pick up my brother-in-law at work and give him a ride home: about 15 minutes one way, then 25 minutes the other way, then 15 minutes back here (in normal conditions). And I might get roped into following him to the mechanic and giving him a ride home from there if he is able to drop off his car to be fixed. (Problem with the radiator and antifreeze.) I’m comfortable driving in the snow (lived briefly in North Dakota and also three years in Missouri), and I’m hoping that the highways will be sparsely populated because of the federal holiday, school closings and such, but I’m not enthusiastic about being out there.
Nutella
@JPL:
No, there are quite a few here who haven’t. :)
elmo
@Steeplejack:
Just don’t go to the grocery store. The checkout lines at Safeway were halfway down the product aisles.
cckids
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Congrats!! I know how soul-crushing long-term unemployment can be. I think you’ve made a wise choice. Good luck with your book & future writing.
Steeplejack
@elmo:
No problemo. Hit the grocery after taking the BIL to work at 7:30 this morning. The place was practically deserted.
PurpleGirl
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Congratulations! I understand why you decided as you did. I think it’s great that you have the job. You should write and write to your hearts content. How soon do you start? Yay, team, yay.