Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

A lot of Dems talk about what the media tells them to talk about. Not helpful.

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

fuckem (in honor of the late great efgoldman)

Republicans are the party of chaos and catastrophe.

The GOP is a fucking disgrace.

They fucked up the fucking up of the fuckup!

Nothing worth doing is easy.

Putin dreamed of ending NATO, and now it’s Finnish-ed.

Hot air and ill-informed banter

Prediction: the GOP will rethink its strategy of boycotting future committees.

“woke” is the new caravan.

“Can i answer the question? No you can not!”

Republicans do not pay their debts.

Not so fun when the rabbit gets the gun, is it?

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

Ah, the different things are different argument.

When do the post office & the dmv weigh in on the wuhan virus?

Is it negotiation when the other party actually wants to shoot the hostage?

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

I’d try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work.

Spilling the end game before they can coat it in frankl luntz-approved dogwhistles.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

Let there be snark.

You are here: Home / Popular Culture / KULCHA! / Open Thread: Legacy Spreading

Reader Interactions

111Comments

  5. 5.

    Violet

    I love Nutella. Have tried substitutes and there are none. Justin’s used to be okay but they changed the recipe and now it’s just gross.

    RIP and thanks for leaving such a delicious legacy.

  6. 6.

    Amir Khalid

    I’ve always wondered: should it be pronounced Nut-ella or Noo-tella? I know the latter is the standard, but being aware that it’s made with hazelnuts has always made me feel it should be the former.

  9. 9.

    Tissue Thin Pseudonym

    I’m employed! I’m fucking employed!

    How is it conceivably possible that one can unsuccessfully look for work for seven years with thousands of applications and then get two job offers on the same goddamned day? For two positions that were absolutely and utterly unlike.

    One was the job in LaCrosse: working on an unclaimed property audit. The upside was that it is in my field and so it could lead to other, better opportunities and that it pays $24/hour. The downside: it’s temporary, so I would need to look for work again in 6-12 months; it means living in LaCrosse and away from my cats five days a week; and the people I’d be working for have come across as clueless nitwits over the five months since I first applied.

    The other is a security guard job in Maple Grove, 20 minutes from home. The downside is that it’s a dead end job that wouldn’t lead anywhere and it pays $14/hour instead of $24. The upside: it’s permanent, so I don’t have to go back into the hell of unemployment if I don’t want to; it doesn’t involve living in LaCrosse at all; and it turns out that it’s not just a security guard job but rather the perfect security guard job for me. It involves sitting by yourself in an office with monitors of various facilities and dealing with alarms at the entrances to two (soon to be four) secure rooms, making sure you don’t screw any of them up, and fully documenting each incident so that when the Department of Energy audits the records they understand exactly what happened. It also involves contractors calling to be admitted to facilities and buzzing them in if they have authorization, but that’s actually the minor, though more frequent, part of the job. The main alarm apparently only goes off 5-7 times a month, but it’s so important not to screw it up that they are willing to pay decently to make sure that they have someone reliable and dedicated to deal with each one. And they recognize that you can’t have someone smart, reliable and dedicated who does nothing for 90-95% of his shift and then tell them that they have to just stare at the monitors the whole time. They say to bring in your laptop or your books and keep yourself amused and engaged while you’re there, so there is lots of acknowledged time to read and write.

    You might be able to guess from the lengths of those two paragraphs that I’ve chosen the security position. It probably means that I never will go into accounting, but I’m okay with that. The security, the stability, and the opportunity to get paid while I further my writing career are all worth it.

    Through all of this, I never thought that I would actually find myself writing an email telling someone that I am declining their offer of a job that I would have accepted in a vacuum. It felt really weird, but also really good.

  11. 11.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym:

    I am very happy for you! It really sounds like a perfect fit. This has been a long, hard slog and I’m thrilled that there is a happy ending. Congratulations!

    Edit: Thanks for fixing the italics.

  13. 13.

    Gin & Tonic

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Congratulations. I’ve seen some of how difficult this time has been for you.

    FWIW, a few of the security guards who work at my facility are also intelligent, accomplished people who use their “downtime” for interesting things. So it’s only as “dead-end” as you make it.

  16. 16.

    Pogonip

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Congrats! Now you can work on your book while guarding!

    The guard job, while it pays less, is likely to be around longer. The accounting job will probably be done by someone in China or India within the next 5 years.

  17. 17.

    Violet

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Congratulations! Maybe the security job will give you the security (ha ha) you need to focus on your writing and you’ll end up being a writer. Or maybe the company has other opportunities, including something related to accounting, that you’d be eligible to apply for at some point down the road.

  19. 19.

    Pogonip

    Obligatory weather remark: 5 degrees here.

    Yesterday bayourenaissanceman.blogspot.com posted something that made me laugh out loud, a picture of a wolf captioned: “The groundhog predicted six more weeks of winter. So I ate him.”

  22. 22.

    Punchy

    @burnspbesq: But gay chicks aren’t the icky kind, so they’re OK. In fact, they’re the hot girl-on-girl kind, just needing that good Southern gentleman to join in and show ’em a thing or two.

    Let me know when an openly gay MAN in an official D500 capacity is allowed within 500 yards of that place….

  29. 29.

    JCJ

    @beltane:

    Who would have thought that there would be such a big demand for Martin Luther figurines in 2015.

    Maybe they want to buy them now and sell them for souvenirs in 2017?

  30. 30.

    JCJ

    @Amir Khalid:

    I first learned of Nutella in Germany, so I have always said new-tella. Thanks. Now I will stay up all night trying to decide which is correct. I liked the suggestion that you learn Italian next. Seems the best solution.

  32. 32.

    beltane

    @JCJ: That would make sense, though they would be more expensive/higher quality than is usual for such souvenirs. Perhaps Playmobile will follow up with a release of Pope Leo figurines.

  33. 33.

    greennotGreen

    Congratulations to TTP!

    I’ll be retiring in a few months, and I encourage anyone else of close to retirement age to consider it to open up positions for younger people. Of course, in my line of work there are people who would rather do research than eat, so we have some people wandering around in the corridors who look like they’ve mistaken the lab for a room at Shady Acres. As long as the mind is good, they can still make contributions – I just hope they aren’t taking paychecks that could start a young family.

    More importantly, Nutella. I don’t know that I’d ever had it till a cousin turned me on to crepes filled with Nutella and bananas. It is awesome!

  35. 35.

    Amir Khalid

    @JCJ:

    I first learned of Nutella in Germany, so I have always said new-tella.

    I’d only say it that way if it were spelled “Nütella”. The pronunciation common in Malaysia follows the Italian “Noo-tell-ah”.

  37. 37.

    elmo

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
    Many, many congratulations. And security does not have to be a dead end, not at all. Especially if you’re at a DOE facility.

    With three years of security experience, clean credit, and a modest level of physical fitness, there are security jobs that pay upwards of $20-22 an hour plus benefits, plus overtime.

  38. 38.

    Amir Khalid

    @Roger Moore:
    Reading further down that FAQ, I’m intrigued to learn that the palm oil used to make Nutella is all sourced from plantations in Malaysia to ensure sustainability.

  41. 41.

    Bobby B.

    @Amir Khalid: Malaysia uses female prison workers in plantations. They wear cutoffs and halter tops and frequently get into fights in the mud. I seen a movie about it.

  44. 44.

    Roger Moore

    @Amir Khalid:

    I’m a bit suspicious of that pronunciation, since it comes from the US office.

    I disagree. I think the US is a good place to get pronunciation advice precisely because Americans are more likely to need it.

  45. 45.

    raven

    Mike Ehrmantraut from Breaking Bad is a parking lot checkout guy in Better Call Saul so there is mobility in static positions. Do they supply ammo?

  47. 47.

    Buddy H

    I thought I was losing my sense of humor, because for a few years I’d watch SNL sketches and not crack a smile. Then I watched Key & Peele’s first season, and laughed my ass off. Inside Amy Schumer gives me a laugh sometimes as well.

    I didn’t watch the 40th SNL, but we just watched the Celebrity Jeopardy sketch, and I found if painful.

    I’m old enough to remember seeing the original SNL cast live, before SNL. We went to National Lampoon’s Lemmings, a live show with Chevy, Jane, Belushi, and some Lampoon people. This was in the early ’70s before their national fame.

    George Carlin didn’t have a good experience with SNL. In his autobiography (written with Tony Hendra) he calls Lorne Michaels a “c****ker” He didn’t have much good to say about Billy Crystal, either.

  49. 49.

    piratedan

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym: congrats sir, I hope that the job helps keep a roof over your head, food on your table and kibble in your cats bowls and allows you to feed that inner part of you the yearns to create.

  50. 50.

    ruemara

    Not for the first time in the past 3 months, but can I get an assistant editor that knows how to edit? Basic, like, most basic knowledge of AP & AE linking would be awesome.

    I’m doing a lot of teaching or do it myselfing with two aides that are not trained.

  51. 51.

    piratedan

    @Buddy H: people is people and even folks that I like and respect that intersect in my circle don’t always get along because of reasons….

  54. 54.

    Belafon

    @ShadeTail: I’m kind of curious about the guy. It’s obvious he went with cable instead of DirecTv. But to just sit around and wait until Zandar posts. Someone could probably earn their PhD explaining this behavior.

  56. 56.

    Violet

    @raven: If you like chocolate, you’ll probably like Nutella. If you like hazelnuts but not chocolate you probably won’t like Nutella. If you like chocolate and hazelnuts, you’ll love Nutella.

    I can’t keep it in the house because I’ll eat it with a spoon straight out of the jar.

  57. 57.

    Tenar Darell

    I can’t have Nutella in the house. I have no self control around its yumminess. Of course, if someone I know bakes or frosts with it, or has it at brunch, I’m very happy to eat up half their supply. Thank you Michele Ferrero, go forth to with your heavenly chocolate.

  60. 60.

    Xenos

    I understand the palm oil they use in Nutella is not that good for you, and that a lot of rain forest has been cut down for the palm oil plantations to make it. Delhaize/Food Lion has a similar spread that uses healthier oil, but I have not tried it. Kids accept no imitations.

  62. 62.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @raven:
    @JPL:

    I much prefer Marmite* to Vegemite, and for a sweet spread, give me the Biscoff (creamy or crunchy) every time! I know Trader Joe’s also has something similar that some folks here are crazy about, but the Biscoff is so good, I figure why mess with success?

    *Marmite is wonderful spread on buttered toast, although I can’t slather it on too lavishly. A little goes a very long way. But it is tasty!

  63. 63.

    Tree With Water

    I’d never even heard of Nutella until pop-up ads for it began to recently intrude on another website I peruse. It looks absolutely horrible.

  64. 64.

    JustRuss

    When I was bike touring in the Netherlands, Nutella was a staple at every B&B we stayed at. We referred to it as “frosting”, although I suppose it’s slightly healthier. Darn yummy.

  66. 66.

    boatboy_srq

    @ShadeTail: @raven: For some reason, my eyes crossed reading your two comments, and I wound up with an image of a troll that tastes like Vegemite – and now I need brain bleach.

  68. 68.

    gogol's wife

    @raven:

    No, no, no. It’s a delicious blend of chocolate and hazelnuts. It kept me spiritually alive through a Moscow winter (I could buy it at the American embassy supermarket).

    ETA: Vegemite is heinous!

  72. 72.

    Amir Khalid

    @Xenos:
    People here have been cooking (and baking, and doing other food-related things) with palm oil for generations. I doubt that it is significantly worse or better for you than any other vegetable oil, whatever the competitors of palm oil producers or their paid shills may say.

  73. 73.

    ruemara

    I’m a party pooper. I like Panda better. Nutella is now mainly powered sugar, hazelnut flavor and oil. As the ingredients got poorer in quality, it got more popular. /food snob

    There’s a good recipe for homemade but it really depends on patience and a quality food processor.

  75. 75.

    Tree With Water

    @Violet: It looks like chocolate syrup. To pour it on anything seems sort of revolting. It brings to mind the scene in To Kill A Mockingbird, when Scout laughs at the kid who poured syrup over his entire meal. I’m with Scout where Nutella is concerned- what in the Sam Hill are you doing?

  77. 77.

    Tommy

    Strange as it might sound, never had Nutella. Not even licked a knife/spoon. If I want to spread something it is butter, hummus, and peanut butter (in about that order). I recall the first time I found humus about 15 years ago. It blew my mind somehow I got to be around 30 and had never had it. And peanut butter. Oh peanut butter how I flat out love you. You’ve been my friend since before I have memories!

    I’d say 80% of my breakfasts (and also snacks) are a half everything bagel, toasted, light spread of peanut butter (or hummus included in the 80%), and either V8 juice with some Tobasco, and whatever fruit is in house.

    But with that said, I know more than a few people that might end their lives (in not really I guess) without Nutella.

    BTW: totally forgot today was a Federal holiday. All the projects I am working are for clients not at work today. Strangely getting a free day to clean and do little things around the house that don’t “need” to be done but “should” be done has been far more enjoyable than I would have imagined. Off to unload he dishwasher and reorganize a couple kitchen cabinets.

  78. 78.

    Amir Khalid

    @Tree With Water:
    It’s a spread. It isn’t chocolate syrup. You don’t pour it on your food. You spread it on bread and stuff like that. (I understand that unsweetened chocolate is a common savoury ingredient in Latin American cuisine.)

  80. 80.

    gvg

    @Tree With Water: It’s a spread, like peanut butter. Not pourable. I haven’t tried it but my Mom loves it. I would imagine it enhances some foods and is not a match for others. In fact people do seem to use it like peanut butter. It doesn’t seem horrible to me, just not enticing. Hazlenuts are not that different than other nuts to me. I’d rather have plain dark chocolate actually

  83. 83.

    CaseyL

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym: That is wonderful! Congrats are in order.

    Absolutely take the job you’ll be most comfortable in and enjoy. I spent a long time chasing high-paying jobs which 99% of the time turned out to be hellish.

    I hope this one is as good a fit as it seems to be.

    @Violet: @Tenar Darell: I had to take a jar of Nutella in to work after I started eating it with a spoon. I put a little sign on the jar “Save Me From Myself! Eat this!”

  89. 89.

    Elizabelle

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Yippee! So happy for you.

    You just obtained a writing office with monitors and someone else paying the utilities. And maybe you’ll find some smart and funny people at work.

    I think you made a good choice.

    Go buy some Nutella to celebrate!

  91. 91.

    Josie

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Congratulations! You should feel so proud that your hard work in job hunting has finally paid off. I think you made a really smart choice, since the job fits what other things you want to accomplish. Best of luck with everything.

  92. 92.

    tesslibrarian

    Richest cookies I ever made were shortbread thumbprint cookies that I filled with Nutella instead of jam.

    They were amazing.

  93. 93.

    trollhattan

    @Woodrowfan:
    Impossible to imagine, since it’s basically spreadable candy bar. In fact, a friend once brought back a big ol’ jar of a competing product from his Germany trip–spreadable Milky Way. Had to see it to believe it.

  96. 96.

    Roger Moore

    @ruemara:

    As the ingredients got poorer in quality, it got more popular.

    I think you have cause and effect backward. As the popularity went up, they had to compromise on the quality of their ingredients to keep up with demand. It’s a very common problem.

  97. 97.

    Ruckus

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
    Congrats!
    Having read your posts about being unemployed for, well what probably seems like forever, my year off pales in comparison. But that was enough of a sample to have the understanding that unemployment sucks. Hope you enjoy working and that you are able to write as much as you want.

  98. 98.

    boatboy_srq

    @Woodrowfan: There ARE a few chocolatiers that delve into the sweet-without-sucrose realm. Precious few, though. Most makers these days are too busy getting gluten and fats-as-defined-by-FDA out of their products to worry about a simple thing like sugars.

  100. 100.

    Ruckus

    Haven’t had and Nutella in years so can’t speak to the quality. But thinking this is anything but heaven in a jar just doesn’t make any sense. My problem is like several others here, if it’s in the house it’s never here for long. One jar is worth 3-5 lbs more of me and that only takes a couple of days.

    ETA I’ve only heard it pronounced Nu-tell-a, or for those of you with a more sophisticated voice Noo-tell-a.

  103. 103.

    Mnemosyne (iPad Mini)

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym:

    The security guard position is only a dead-end job if you really aspire to work in accounting. If you’d rather pursue writing — where you’ve already been having some success — then the security guard job is far more suitable so you can have a steady income while you work on your writing. I think you made the right decision.

  105. 105.

    JustRuss

    @trollhattan:

    spreadable Milky Way. Had to see it to believe it.

    Forgot all about that, I found it when I visited Germany 30 years ago, and brought a couple jars back with me. Glad to know it still exists.

  106. 106.

    Steeplejack

    The snow has started a little earlier than I expected here in NoVA, which is slightly worrisome. It’s coming down fairly hard and it’s sticking. I’m girding my loins to go pick up my brother-in-law at work and give him a ride home: about 15 minutes one way, then 25 minutes the other way, then 15 minutes back here (in normal conditions). And I might get roped into following him to the mechanic and giving him a ride home from there if he is able to drop off his car to be fixed. (Problem with the radiator and antifreeze.) I’m comfortable driving in the snow (lived briefly in North Dakota and also three years in Missouri), and I’m hoping that the highways will be sparsely populated because of the federal holiday, school closings and such, but I’m not enthusiastic about being out there.

  107. 107.

    Nutella

    @JPL:

    Am I the only person on the blog, that hasn’t tried nutellla?

    No, there are quite a few here who haven’t. :)

  110. 110.

    Steeplejack

    @elmo:

    No problemo. Hit the grocery after taking the BIL to work at 7:30 this morning. The place was practically deserted.

  111. 111.

    PurpleGirl

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym: Congratulations! I understand why you decided as you did. I think it’s great that you have the job. You should write and write to your hearts content. How soon do you start? Yay, team, yay.

Comments are closed.