As I mentioned yesterday, the mister and I went hiking in the morning. We had a little trouble locating the preserve way out in the middle of the woods, so I used my voice directions app, and Siri directed us there. Then I turned the app off.
Or so I thought! After we’d hiked about two miles into the woods, a voice behind me said “TURN RIGHT!” To the mister’s great amusement, I screeched “WTF!!” and jumped halfway out of my skin. It was the stupid phone in my backpack.
Then a litte while later, a big fucking snake slithered right across the trail in front of us. I saw it before the mister and made a panicky squeal and grabbed his sleeve. He said, “What?!?” and when I told him about the gigantic freaking snake, he had the nerve to suggest that maybe hiking wasn’t for me and I should try mall-walking instead. Smart ass!
We saw this sign at a store: 
That’s some serious cloud-shouting there. Open thread!
Roger Moore
If giant snakes aren’t your thing, perhaps Florida is not for you.
trollhattan
If only we could match up each feral python with a meth dealer, we could house them all and give the Glades back to the gators.
divF
Is everyone getting a “should Sarah Palin run for Senate?” ad above the Balloon Juice banner ?
I’d click on it to say yes (we need as many sure losers on the R side as possible), but I’m afraid I would start getting really weird and annoying stuff on my Balloon Juice page.
ETA: Sarah P. running for Senate would be a cross between Senator Palpatine and Jar-Jar Binks.
Iowa Old Lady
@divF: I get asked about Palin too and feel the same urge to click and vote yes.
In the same vein, Mr IOL just told me that this time, he plans to go to the R caucuses and vote for Ted Cruz just to screw with them.
germy shoemangler
@divF: Yes I get that ad every time I visit. Also a variety of NRA ads and some asking if Obama should be impeached.
I get paranoid and think the site is being trolled by RW advertisers, but then I realize it’s probably a computer algorithm automatically placing ads on political blogs. I think.
srv
The really frigthening thing is as all those low-rise jean wearing youts get older and fat, asscracks are going to be the new normal.
Goblue72
Racist sign.
ruemara
I’m watching Shaun of the Dead. I forgot how unmittegatedly stupid his mom, friend and well, darned near everyone was.
germy shoemangler
@Goblue72: Since “sagging pants showing underwear” is dog whistle for “young black male” I assume this is the subtle modern version of “coloreds strongly discouraged”
WaterGirl
That sign is awesome. In its own way, of course.
You should re-post that sign from a year or two ago, the one with all the apostrophes. All I remember is that it was about a sandwich and that it was hysterically funny. Hope you still have it somewhere!
Ned
My AdBlock app seems to prevent me from seeing all those goodies. I wonder if that sign includes fat redneck butt crackers or just the young hippity hoppers.
Ah, Florida.
WaterGirl
@germy shoemangler: As much as we talk about Pailin and Cruz and other right wing crazies, the algorithms probably do “think” we are a right wing site.
Keith P.
Let’s say you do bring in one or two people who would like to see your underwear. What then?
In other news, I am prepping my hallway for new flooring. I’m 5 feet into 45 feet worth of pulling up old carpet board. Nails in concrete every 6 inches on each side. It’s gonna be a loooong day.
Iowa Old Lady
@WaterGirl: Do you think Red State gets ads asking them to tell Warren to fun?
rikyrah
Just watched the Sleepy Hollow Season Finale again.
Still makes me smile.
LOL
SO glad they were renewed for another season.
NotMax
Hmmmmmm. So one reading is they not only want to see the underwear of kids under 3 but are anxious to make that desire clear.
WaterGirl
@Iowa Old Lady: I am totally guessing here, but I imagine there is almost no accountability when it comes to what you get for your internet ad money. Do you think you get a list of websites where your ad was placed? I think not, but I have no idea.
From your question, it seems like you have more of an idea of how this all works than I do. What do you think?
Tree With Water
In 1965 a sign like that might have made mention of chicken and watermelon. We’ve got the same yahoos out in California, of course. A person can’t swing a dead cat in Sonoma county without hitting a young, stupid white male who despises hispanic California. The difference being that Sonoma county never dragged the country into a Civil War, I suppose. And we tend to grow them more discrete hereabouts, too, because we’ve got the bastards outnumbered.
“He was campaign shouting like a southern diplomat..”. Chuck Berry (‘Nadine’).
“..How do I explain?
Not too many people
Can see we’re all the same..”. George Harrison (‘All Things Must Pass’).
Gex
Back before poor black kids made a fashion statement out of wearing old hand me downs, I remember the saggy pants phenomenon being called plumber’s crack. At a diner in Ohio once, I saw no fewer than 5 fat white guys with saggy pants. Funny how it didn’t draw the same ire back then, innit?
At least the kids have the sense to cover their crack with underwear.
Egypt Steve
Seriously? They let 3 year old thugs come in with their pants hanging down? Haven’t they read the stories over at TPM about all the 3-year-olds who shoot their parents in the face?
Kathleen
Nature scares me. I am so screwed when the Apocalypse occurs. Florida scares me too. (Excluding fellow Floridians here on BJ and my family and their friends.).
Mnemosyne (tablet)
I have the beginnings of a migraine today, which I’m hoping is a sign that it really is going to rain on Tuesday (I tend to get weather-related migraines). Time to take some Excedrin.
Gex
@Mnemosyne (tablet): I’m sorry to hear. Hoping it is mild and leaves quickly!
I had to skip Easter with the fam because of a cold. I feel okay enough, but I don’t want to get anyone sick.
MattF
@Egypt Steve: Anchor babies!
Zinsky
Saggy pantaloons non grata. It’s an idiotic look so let them embarrass themselves. Really dumb from a “flying under the radar” standpoint too. Hoping the sun stays out here this afternoon, so I can get my bicycle ready for spring.
Mike in NC
Wife’s best friend from high school came to visit last week. Hopes to retire from Loudon County (VA) public school system this year and possibly relocate here. She went for a solo walk on our beach and promptly stepped on a large rusty fish hook, complete with lure. We picked her up and went to urgent care, where the wait was estimated at two hours. Then went to the nearest ER, so that basically shot the entire afternoon. Aside from that she had a good time.
Iowa Old Lady
@WaterGirl: I think Germy’s right in #5. There’s an algorithm looking for political sites.
But I really have no idea of how internet ads crop up where they do. I look at a book on Amazon and then half an hour later, it’s an ad on Facebook. How does that happen?
SuperHrefna
@divF: I hit refresh a couple times, but mine wants me to either switch to a Fiat ( never gonna happen) or buy a plus sized hooded zipper coat ( maayybee…) or Mid Century Modern furniture (if only I had the money and space!) I’ve managed to stay in the boat for a while, so maybe that’s why I’m not getting head-trauma-teabagger type ads. My right side ad is seriously tempting me with that ladle shaped like the Loch Ness Monster…
Violet
@Iowa Old Lady: From a cookie thst Amazon puts on your computer.
Iowa Old Lady
@Violet: Sneaky devils. That’s probably a good reason not to click on the Palin ad. I’d get grift appeals forever.
Tree With Water
@Mike in NC: She should make a necklace or earring from that lure. Maybe shellac a drop of her own blood onto the jewelry, to better tell the story when people compliment her on it.
MattF
@Iowa Old Lady: There are people who are devoting their lives to making that happen.
satby
It’s beautiful out today, sunny and mild mid-60s. So I finished one batch of my new test shampoo bar recipe and already feel like playing hooky from the rest of my to-do list.
I was annoyed because the first loaf of soap is unscented by accident, but I remembered in time for the second loaf to dump in the scent and mix it in. I hate when I do stuff like that!
CanadaGoose
@divF: I get the far more appropriate for this crowd: CLEAR YOUR CRIMINAL RECORD FOR LIFE
(or is that a stealth Palin thing?)
Ruckus
@Tree With Water:
4 yrs ago in Marin county I saw on of the largest confederate flags outside of a southern government building I’ve ever seen. It was being flown from a jacked up pickup driven by a teenage asshole who lived down the street from me. So even in liberal Marin there are racist fucks. Then of course this is where I walked past, in 2008, a middle aged black man walking down the street wearing a McCain sweatshirt. This in a county where just seeing a black person is unusual.
divF
@MattF: And getting paid *very* good money to do it.
I have a really hard time dealing with the data mining zealots in the sciences. Specifically the ones who claim that we don’t need any human-derived theory or model in the loop – just turn on the machine learning algorithm loose on the data, and it will discover the right theory for you. This approach is what gets Sister Sarah showing up here. While lack of selectivity is probably harmless in advertising, it is a waste of time, resources, and data if you really want to predict the right answer.
Ruckus
@Mnemosyne (tablet):
70% chance of rain on Tuesday. I find that my arthritis is also a very good indicator. And it’s indicating today.
SuperHrefna
@satby: Advertise the unscented one as a special for people with allergies!
Ruckus
@satby:
Did you keep the unscented shampoo?
I hate all personal/laundry items scented, many of them cause an allergic reaction.
gogol's wife
@ruemara:
But mom is played by the brilliant Penelope Wilton!
SuperHrefna
@Ruckus: Great minds, etc! I’m in your boat, it’s a shame because I love pretty scents but I have to be super careful with my allergies so I buy most things unscented unless previous experience has shown me the scents won’t mess me up. I like breathing.
ThresherK
@rikyrah: My wife is a sucker for a handsome Brit, so she was on board from day one.
I got pulled in when Our Hero went to the museum and told the docent “Paul Revere wouldn’t say The British are coming!. We were all British, it was The Regulars are coming!“.
Ruckus
@SuperHrefna:
Took me a long time to find soap that doesn’t cause me to itch without a 2 hr steaming hot shower to insure it is all rinsed off. And with the drought in CA, no long showers! Soaps, fabric softener, detergent, shampoo, don’t even think about conditioner, after shave(not a problem, don’t shave!), but the worst is perfumes/colognes. In close quarters this can have me congested in seconds. Minutes and risk a migraine.
Mnemosyne
@satby:
I agree with everyone else that you should sell that batch as fragrance-free since there are a lot of allergy-prone people out there. It sounds as though Ruckus may even be willing to be a test subject for you since you can tell him exactly what’s in it before he tries it. ;-)
Goblue72
@germy shoemangler: yup
satby
@Ruckus: @SuperHrefna: @Mnemosyne: I never waste a batch, I will sell it unscented, as soon as I test the formula on my guinea pig to see how it works.
Which would be me, no actual animals used for cosmetic testing here.
satby
@Ruckus: Hit me up at my site (it’s my nym link) and maybe I have something that can work for you. I’m an autoimmune nightmare of allergies myself, but it turned out that I really was allergic to many of the phthalates and petrochemical ingredients used in most commercial products.
RSA
There’s a sign like that at a gas station on my way to work. The changeable message by the roadside is often about Jesus or NASCAR or, you know, how a racist sees the world.
Many years ago I stopped there for gas. This was before paying with a card at the pump became ubiquitous. Instead, a sign asked you to go inside to pay in advance. So I walked in, stood behind a couple of black guys there for the same reason, and when I got to the counter I paid up. The older guy behind the counter said, “Oh, you didn’t have to pay in advance.” “Okay, thanks,” I said, wondering why he’d said that to me and not the other two—oh. Right.
Ruckus
@satby:
Went on the site and it looks grand. Yes a lot of the problem is the chemicals but even without them a lot of the scents drive me crazy. So I go for unscented if at all possible. It is today but you have to look for it. But shampoo is the one that gets me. Nothing sold commercially is without chemicals but I find the cheap ones can work OK and don’t cause me problems but I get sensitive to them after a while and there goes the search once again. I use a P&G soap, it’s the largest selling in the world according to them but it’s hard to find in stores in the states, at least in many states I’ve been in.
It always amazes me that some one will mask the smell of being human with something that reeks far worse.
So back to the original point, do I ask you for custom products?
Amir Khalid
@divF:
Before I Adblocked this site again (for performance reasons) I used to get campaign ads from John Cornyn. The algorithm seemed quite unaware that I’m not in America and don’t vote there.
Smedley the uncertain
@Violet:
Re : Cookies
1. Fire Fox Ad Block plus. Effective and can be modded to allow ‘just thus page” or ‘Balloon- Juice .com’.
2. Right click to “Close and erase cookies for the current site” when finished.
3. Run CCleaner with “clear cookies” option set.
Effective enough that guilt demands I respond to John’s occasional Bleg.
satby
@Ruckus: sure! Send me a message on Etsy, I do custom orders all the time.
Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism
@Smedley the uncertain: Firefox plus:
1. AdBlock
2. NoScript
3. Self Destructing Cookies
I’m paranoid about ads and javascript because they are major virus vectors.
Tree With Water
@Ruckus: A decade ago I got caught in traffic on my way to the city of Sonoma during Nascar weekend. Hundreds of campers were parked directly across the road from Sears Point Raceway, and it seemed as if every other one flew a Confederate flag. It was like overlooking a campground of the Army of Northern Virginia. The hell of it is, I probably wouldn’t have looked twice at the same sight in at least half the country.
Ruckus
@Tree With Water:
I lived in SC for 2 yrs. 40+ yrs ago. It surprised me then to see confederate flags. Now I’d bet I’d see more. Mainly because the one I described above is the first one I’ve seen in person in a long time. Bigots have been “allowed” to fly their flag by the Greasy Old Poops for a while now. Buckley was a huge bigot but he knew how to hid his words. The current crop doesn’t. Maybe that’s better, at least you know the enemy now.
Tree With Water
@Ruckus: “The current crop doesn’t. Maybe that’s better, at least you know the enemy now”.
Malcom X said as much about Barry Goldwater and the movement he led. He respected the wolf more than he did the wolf in sheep’s clothing, which he considered LBJ and all white liberals to be.
Fred
Here in Sweden the younguns are sporting tight stretch jeans with the crotch halfway down the thigh. It looks really silly and they can’t really walk right in them. At least the shoes with really long pointy toes seem to be fading away.
When I was a wayward youth we wore some outrageous clothes but I don’t recall wearing anything that greatly impeaded normal movement.
Ex Regis
Turning the map app “off” is the same as turning the music app “off.” In both cases the app continues in the background. There’s an explicit END button in the maps app, just like there’s a PAUSE button in the music app. This way you can use your phone for whatever while listening to music and getting voice directions.
Where I live, one can’t predict race by pants slippage. Just like one can’t predict race by music choice. Except for the country kids.