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You are here: Home / Confirming Our Suspicions

Confirming Our Suspicions

by John Cole|  April 24, 20157:37 pm| 45 Comments

This post is in: Our Failed Political Establishment

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Senate Republicans are on drugs:

A U.S. Senate staffer allegedly dabbled in drug importation, according to law enforcement. Fred W. Pagan, a staffer for U.S. Senator Thad Cochran (R-Miss.) allegedly told law enforcement agents that he imported drugs from China in a plan to exchange them for sexual favors, according to new documents filed in U.S. District Court.

Yesterday, officers from Homeland Security and the Metropolitan Police Department raided Pagan’s home on the 5700 block of Colorado Ave. NW. Inside, they allegedly found 181.5 grams of meth, which Pagan allegedly told officers he received on behalf of “his distributor.”

I’d argue that 181 grams of meth is a skosh more than “dabbling,” but YMMV. You are Juicers, after all.

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45Comments

  1. 1.

    Baud

    April 24, 2015 at 7:42 pm

    Fred W. Pagan, a staffer for U.S. Senator Thad Cochran (R-Miss.) allegedly told law enforcement agents that he imported drugs from China in a plan to exchange them for sexual favors,

    For the love if God, please tell me that he wasn’t seeking sexual favors from Thad Chochran.

  2. 2.

    muddy

    April 24, 2015 at 7:43 pm

    Now they’re even outsourcing meth? What is America coming to?

  3. 3.

    Omnes Omnibus

    April 24, 2015 at 7:47 pm

    He can’t get meth in Mississippi?

  4. 4.

    Cain

    April 24, 2015 at 7:48 pm

    All we need now is a gay related scandal involving this staff, Thad Cochran, and some gay escorts and meth.

  5. 5.

    Baud

    April 24, 2015 at 7:49 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Goddamn TPP.

  6. 6.

    Omnes Omnibus

    April 24, 2015 at 7:51 pm

    @Cain: Brain bleach please.

  7. 7.

    Major Major Major Major

    April 24, 2015 at 7:52 pm

    Importing meth from China? Can’t you just like make it? I think I saw that on TV once.

  8. 8.

    Roger Moore

    April 24, 2015 at 7:53 pm

    Senate Republicans are on drugs:

    Yeah, but given their connections to reality, I was assuming it was more along the lines of hallucinogens rather than stimulants.

  9. 9.

    Major Major Major Major

    April 24, 2015 at 7:53 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: What if everybody else was hot?

  10. 10.

    Omnes Omnibus

    April 24, 2015 at 7:54 pm

    @Major Major Major Major: Just no.

  11. 11.

    gogol's wife

    April 24, 2015 at 7:56 pm

    On PBS just now, David Brooks said, “Marco Rubio is shooting up.” I thought he was talking about the polls, but hmmmm . . . .

  12. 12.

    Mike J

    April 24, 2015 at 7:58 pm

    Pagan first came on law enforcement’s radar on April 9, when customs agents found a Chinese package addressed to him in Ohio that held more than a kilo of GBL, a controlled drug akin to “date rape drug” GHB. After the search, Pagan allegedly told investigators that he had received three other GBL packages. According to the court filing, Pagan said that he handed out the GBL and meth “in exchange for sexual favors.”

    Not just a drug smuggler, a really, really stupid one.

  13. 13.

    Villago Delenda Est

    April 24, 2015 at 8:00 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: My question exactly. Not only is he on drugs, he’s on imported drugs, damaging the domestic illegal drug market!

  14. 14.

    Villago Delenda Est

    April 24, 2015 at 8:01 pm

    @Mike J: Well, is a staffer for a worthless sack of Rethuglican shit. They don’t grow them very bright.

  15. 15.

    jl

    April 24, 2015 at 8:01 pm

    “I’d argue that 181 grams of meth is a skosh more than “dabbling,”

    IOKIYAR principle?

    Maybe could find a whole ‘shroom farm, twelve phonebooks worth of blotter and a months harvest of Peruvian coca crop and it would still be ‘dabbling’.

  16. 16.

    rikyrah

    April 24, 2015 at 8:02 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    He can’t get meth in Mississippi?

    BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA AH HA

  17. 17.

    Major Major Major Major

    April 24, 2015 at 8:03 pm

    @jl: You know, that’s the problem with making acid. You always end up with too much. And then you’re like, crap, what am I going to do with all this acid? hashtag firstworldproblems

  18. 18.

    Roger Moore

    April 24, 2015 at 8:09 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    Not only is he on drugs, he’s on imported drugs, damaging the domestic illegal drug market!

    Damn right. Real Americans® would be smoking good old American pot instead of this weird imported Chinese stuff. Or they’d be cooking their own Meth instead of importing it.

  19. 19.

    greennotGreen

    April 24, 2015 at 8:14 pm

    @Roger Moore: Plus, the Chinese meth is cut with melamine, so if you use it, your dog dies.

  20. 20.

    Peale

    April 24, 2015 at 8:28 pm

    @Mike J: the kind of sexual favors one gets from the date rape drug?

  21. 21.

    Keith G

    April 24, 2015 at 8:29 pm

    @greennotGreen:

    Plus, the Chinese meth is cut with melamine, so if you use it, your dog dies

    And..an hour later, you are hungry.

  22. 22.

    Ripley

    April 24, 2015 at 8:30 pm

    Fred W. Pagan

    Was Senior Staffer Bill M. Satanworshipper unavailable for comment?

  23. 23.

    Mustang Bobby

    April 24, 2015 at 8:32 pm

    “But officer, I’m a job creator for my dealer!”

  24. 24.

    Omnes Omnibus

    April 24, 2015 at 8:32 pm

    @Ripley: He was out buying the dildos and wetsuits.

  25. 25.

    Wag

    April 24, 2015 at 8:34 pm

    @Mike J:

    We’re the sexual favors due to the date rape drug? It would be irresponsible not to speculate.

  26. 26.

    Felonius Monk

    April 24, 2015 at 8:37 pm

    exchange them for sexual favors

    Would those be like the sexual favors with sheep that Thad Cochran talked about last year? Inquiring minds want to know.

  27. 27.

    greennotGreen

    April 24, 2015 at 8:38 pm

    @efgoldman: No, that’s true. Combined with formaldehyde it makes melamine resin from which dishware was made, but because melamine is high in nitrogen, it was used as an adulterant in some food products made in China that killed some human babies there and dogs in the United States.

  28. 28.

    Roger Moore

    April 24, 2015 at 8:49 pm

    @efgoldman:

    Wasn’t melamine crappy but indestructible plastic dinnerware which was around from after WW2 into the 50s?

    That’s what it’s called, but it isn’t pure melamine; it’s a melamine/formaldehyde copolymer resin. Pure melamine is what the Chinese were putting into milk powder to make it look like it had higher protein content.

  29. 29.

    Ripley

    April 24, 2015 at 8:53 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: What a relief he’s got that covered. Twice.

  30. 30.

    Howard Beale IV

    April 24, 2015 at 8:59 pm

    @Mike J: And GBL is Schedule I to boot.

  31. 31.

    PaulW

    April 24, 2015 at 9:25 pm

    @muddy:

    Now they’re even outsourcing meth? What is America coming to?

    The quality of American-made drugs on a downward spiral ever since the end of the Ozymandias episode of Breaking Bad.

  32. 32.

    PaulW

    April 24, 2015 at 9:26 pm

    How sad is it that a guy earning a $160,000 a year salary had to stoop to drug and sex deals to survive.

  33. 33.

    Scott Peterson

    April 24, 2015 at 10:19 pm

    How on earth could Thad Cochran hire a Pagan? Alert Newsmax!

  34. 34.

    Bobby B

    April 24, 2015 at 10:22 pm

    @muddy: US has been outsourcing meth since states banned Sudefed or made it stupid and complicated to buy, therefore shifting the source to Mexican cartels, therefore creating a Danger for the DEA to get funds to fight, therefore… oh my head hurts, time for my Power Nap.

  35. 35.

    Howard Beale IV

    April 24, 2015 at 10:30 pm

    You are Juicers, after all.

    Sounds like Pagan was a huge supplier for tweakers (if not a tweaker himself)

  36. 36.

    bcinaz

    April 24, 2015 at 10:30 pm

    Chinese meth lab? WTF

  37. 37.

    Brandon

    April 24, 2015 at 11:19 pm

    If he wasn’t a white Senate staffer, he wouldn’t be referred to as an illegal drug “importer”. He’d be called a “smuggler”, “mule”, or worse.

  38. 38.

    brendancalling

    April 25, 2015 at 12:51 am

    181 grams is 6.5 ounces, aka nearly a half pound of METH. That’s not dabbling. At all.

  39. 39.

    Xenos

    April 25, 2015 at 1:47 am

    @Major Major Major Major: The excess-production of acid was an issue back in the 80s. When I was in high school a friend would pick up blotter acid for free from a buddy at MIT who was engaged in some illicit projects in the chemistry labs. He had concluded it was safer to dispose of the stuff through a sizeable fraction of the Boston-area Deadhead population than it was to flush what they did not need down the sewer.

  40. 40.

    Zinsky

    April 25, 2015 at 6:11 am

    Maybe we need to re-think the aphorism that a libertarian is just a conservative who likes to smoke pot. Maybe it is more like – a conservative is just a psychopath who likes to snort crank!

  41. 41.

    J

    April 25, 2015 at 10:30 am

    Is he saying ‘in exchange for sexual favors’ in order to avoid saying the more likely truth ‘for money’, which would make him liable to more serious charges of dealing?

  42. 42.

    Citizen_X

    April 25, 2015 at 11:39 am

    You are Juicers, after all.

    No, I’m not! I demand a drug test! OK, not for cannabis, though.

  43. 43.

    Alien_radio

    April 25, 2015 at 2:02 pm

    Meth and sexual favours? I sense this republican staffer may be gay.

    Edit: Oh GHB ? this guy is 100% gay. What is it with republicans?

  44. 44.

    SFAW

    April 25, 2015 at 6:49 pm

    @bcinaz:

    Chinese meth lab? WTF

    When asked to comment, the head cooker, a Mr. Walter Bakguai, was heard to say “Wo shi haoren.”

  45. 45.

    SFAW

    April 25, 2015 at 6:50 pm

    @brendancalling:

    181 grams is 6.5 ounces, aka nearly a half pound of METH. That’s not dabbling. At all.

    A) To-MAY-toe, to-MAH-toe

    or
    B) IOKIYAR

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