Senate Republicans are on drugs:
A U.S. Senate staffer allegedly dabbled in drug importation, according to law enforcement. Fred W. Pagan, a staffer for U.S. Senator Thad Cochran (R-Miss.) allegedly told law enforcement agents that he imported drugs from China in a plan to exchange them for sexual favors, according to new documents filed in U.S. District Court.
Yesterday, officers from Homeland Security and the Metropolitan Police Department raided Pagan’s home on the 5700 block of Colorado Ave. NW. Inside, they allegedly found 181.5 grams of meth, which Pagan allegedly told officers he received on behalf of “his distributor.”
I’d argue that 181 grams of meth is a skosh more than “dabbling,” but YMMV. You are Juicers, after all.
Baud
For the love if God, please tell me that he wasn’t seeking sexual favors from Thad Chochran.
muddy
Now they’re even outsourcing meth? What is America coming to?
Omnes Omnibus
He can’t get meth in Mississippi?
Cain
All we need now is a gay related scandal involving this staff, Thad Cochran, and some gay escorts and meth.
Baud
@Omnes Omnibus:
Goddamn TPP.
Omnes Omnibus
@Cain: Brain bleach please.
Major Major Major Major
Importing meth from China? Can’t you just like make it? I think I saw that on TV once.
Roger Moore
Yeah, but given their connections to reality, I was assuming it was more along the lines of hallucinogens rather than stimulants.
Major Major Major Major
@Omnes Omnibus: What if everybody else was hot?
Omnes Omnibus
@Major Major Major Major: Just no.
gogol's wife
On PBS just now, David Brooks said, “Marco Rubio is shooting up.” I thought he was talking about the polls, but hmmmm . . . .
Mike J
Not just a drug smuggler, a really, really stupid one.
Villago Delenda Est
@Omnes Omnibus: My question exactly. Not only is he on drugs, he’s on imported drugs, damaging the domestic illegal drug market!
Villago Delenda Est
@Mike J: Well, is a staffer for a worthless sack of Rethuglican shit. They don’t grow them very bright.
jl
“I’d argue that 181 grams of meth is a skosh more than “dabbling,”
IOKIYAR principle?
Maybe could find a whole ‘shroom farm, twelve phonebooks worth of blotter and a months harvest of Peruvian coca crop and it would still be ‘dabbling’.
rikyrah
@Omnes Omnibus:
BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA AH HA
Major Major Major Major
@jl: You know, that’s the problem with making acid. You always end up with too much. And then you’re like, crap, what am I going to do with all this acid? hashtag firstworldproblems
Roger Moore
@Villago Delenda Est:
Damn right. Real Americans® would be smoking good old American pot instead of this weird imported Chinese stuff. Or they’d be cooking their own Meth instead of importing it.
greennotGreen
@Roger Moore: Plus, the Chinese meth is cut with melamine, so if you use it, your dog dies.
Peale
@Mike J: the kind of sexual favors one gets from the date rape drug?
Keith G
@greennotGreen:
And..an hour later, you are hungry.
Ripley
Was Senior Staffer Bill M. Satanworshipper unavailable for comment?
Mustang Bobby
“But officer, I’m a job creator for my dealer!”
Omnes Omnibus
@Ripley: He was out buying the dildos and wetsuits.
Wag
@Mike J:
We’re the sexual favors due to the date rape drug? It would be irresponsible not to speculate.
Felonius Monk
Would those be like the sexual favors with sheep that Thad Cochran talked about last year? Inquiring minds want to know.
greennotGreen
@efgoldman: No, that’s true. Combined with formaldehyde it makes melamine resin from which dishware was made, but because melamine is high in nitrogen, it was used as an adulterant in some food products made in China that killed some human babies there and dogs in the United States.
Roger Moore
@efgoldman:
That’s what it’s called, but it isn’t pure melamine; it’s a melamine/formaldehyde copolymer resin. Pure melamine is what the Chinese were putting into milk powder to make it look like it had higher protein content.
Ripley
@Omnes Omnibus: What a relief he’s got that covered. Twice.
Howard Beale IV
@Mike J: And GBL is Schedule I to boot.
PaulW
@muddy:
The quality of American-made drugs on a downward spiral ever since the end of the Ozymandias episode of Breaking Bad.
PaulW
How sad is it that a guy earning a $160,000 a year salary had to stoop to drug and sex deals to survive.
Scott Peterson
How on earth could Thad Cochran hire a Pagan? Alert Newsmax!
Bobby B
@muddy: US has been outsourcing meth since states banned Sudefed or made it stupid and complicated to buy, therefore shifting the source to Mexican cartels, therefore creating a Danger for the DEA to get funds to fight, therefore… oh my head hurts, time for my Power Nap.
Howard Beale IV
Sounds like Pagan was a huge supplier for tweakers (if not a tweaker himself)
bcinaz
Chinese meth lab? WTF
Brandon
If he wasn’t a white Senate staffer, he wouldn’t be referred to as an illegal drug “importer”. He’d be called a “smuggler”, “mule”, or worse.
brendancalling
181 grams is 6.5 ounces, aka nearly a half pound of METH. That’s not dabbling. At all.
Xenos
@Major Major Major Major: The excess-production of acid was an issue back in the 80s. When I was in high school a friend would pick up blotter acid for free from a buddy at MIT who was engaged in some illicit projects in the chemistry labs. He had concluded it was safer to dispose of the stuff through a sizeable fraction of the Boston-area Deadhead population than it was to flush what they did not need down the sewer.
Zinsky
Maybe we need to re-think the aphorism that a libertarian is just a conservative who likes to smoke pot. Maybe it is more like – a conservative is just a psychopath who likes to snort crank!
J
Is he saying ‘in exchange for sexual favors’ in order to avoid saying the more likely truth ‘for money’, which would make him liable to more serious charges of dealing?
Citizen_X
No, I’m not! I demand a drug test! OK, not for cannabis, though.
Alien_radio
Meth and sexual favours? I sense this republican staffer may be gay.
Edit: Oh GHB ? this guy is 100% gay. What is it with republicans?
SFAW
@bcinaz:
When asked to comment, the head cooker, a Mr. Walter Bakguai, was heard to say “Wo shi haoren.”
SFAW
@brendancalling:
A) To-MAY-toe, to-MAH-toe
or
B) IOKIYAR