Some good news in Cleveland:
The Cleveland Police Department, which has become a flash point in the racially charged debate over police tactics, has agreed to follow some of the most exacting standards in the nation over how and when its officers can use force, and will accept close oversight to make sure those rules are not ignored, city and federal officials said Tuesday.
The agreement is part of a settlement with the Justice Department over what federal officials have called a pattern of unconstitutional policing and abuse in Cleveland. The Justice Department found that police officers here used stun guns inappropriately, punched and kicked unarmed people, and shot at people who posed no threat. The incidents often went unreported and uninvestigated, investigators found.
“There is much work to be done, across the nation and in Cleveland, to rebuild trust between law enforcement and the communities they serve where it has eroded, but it can be done,” said Vanita Gupta, who leads the Justice Department’s Civil Rights Division. “Today’s agreement really should serve as a model for those seeking to address similar issues in their communities.”
Presumably, climbing on to the hood of a stopped vehicle and dumping 15 rounds into the unarmed occupants will be frowned upon under the new rules. In the old rules, not so much.
Time Travelin'
They had to agree to stop hitting people on the head with their guns. Seriously.
http://www.cleveland.com/metro/index.ssf/2015/05/cleveland_police_to_stop_hitti.html#incart_maj-story-1
Omnes Omnibus
@efgoldman: The Justice Department rides pretty close herd on its consent decrees.
A guy
I’ve sued my share of bad cops. But on balance, the f’in drunk ass criminals are the problem and get what they deserve. If you don’t want to get ur ass shot by a cop don’t commit a crime.
Roger Moore
@A guy:
So what crime did Tamir Rice commit?
Mnemosyne (iPhone)
@efgoldman:
It took 20+ years of being under a consent decree, but the LAPD’s chief actually declared a similar shooting of a motorist after a high-speed chase to be “out of policy.” Consent decrees can work, but they can take a while.
Valdivia
@efgoldman: congrats and good luck to her.
Watching a really good Brazilian film about the period of the dictatorship. The Year My Parents Went on Vacation. Funny and poignant.
David Koch
What’s the use in being a cop if you can’t have any fun?
Thank Obama.
Omnes Omnibus
@A guy: What exactly is your share?
Mnemosyne (iPhone)
@A guy:
I didn’t realize it was a crime to play with an unloaded BB gun at Wal-Mart. Can you show us the Ohio statute for that?
David Koch
@Roger Moore:
What crime – why guilty of being Black, of course.
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
@Omnes Omnibus: That it does, and in the case of Cleveland in particular, it’s a very good thing. I’m an optimist (hopeless?) that Justice will determine that climbing on the hood of a stopped car and shooting at the occupants is a violation of the occupants’ civil rights to survive an encounter with law enforcement.
Mnemosyne (iPhone)
@efgoldman:
Yep. The crime that Malissa Williams and Timothy Russell committed was to have their car backfire within the earshot of some cops who mistook the sound for gunfire. But, hey, all those other poorly maintained cars in Cleveland are on notice now to never backfire, amirite?
Omnes Omnibus
@a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q): I hope you are right about the federal civil rights charges. I understood the judge’s reasoning on the voluntary manslaughter count, but I am a bit flummoxed as to how there was no assault.
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
@Mnemosyne (iPhone): Wal-Mart, in a Dayton suburb, was where John Crawford, a young adult was killed. Tamir Rice was 12 years old in a park in Cleveland. Both committed the crime of being black.
@Omnes Omnibus:
You and me both.
A guy
Rice no crime. An anomaly. Not representative. Don’t be a criminal and you won’t get shot by police. I wish you dumb asses would realize the difference. Again, let’s say it all together, don’t be a criminal. Better yet don’t hang near criminals! Better yet be a co and see what they go thru!
Omnes Omnibus
@A guy: You are a very silly person. Will you now caper for us?
Woodrowfan
@efgoldman: GO KATE!
Baud
@efgoldman:
Cool. I’ll have to remember to watch.
TaMara (BHF)
@efgoldman: I can’t wait and glad for the reminder. YAY
Jim, Foolish Literalist
So you’re a successful attorney when you’re not running your really good, massive, job-creating company on your credit card?
Litlebritdifrnt
@A guy:
Is Brick Oven Bill back?
TaMara (BHF)
So my cousin is a police officer in a nearby town. He was called in over the weekend to help in Cleveland. He has been using his facebook posts to subtly (and not so subtly) remind people that it is everyone’s constitutional right to peacefully protest and that Cleveland has some policing issues that need to be fixed.
I’m very proud of him and if you ever need an example of an officer who takes the Protect and Serve on the side of his vehicle as an oath, I’ll gladly hold him up as an example.
Omnes Omnibus
@efgoldman: As I understand it, Brelo fired shots that would have been fatal, but so did several other officers. As such, it was impossible to determine beyond a reasonable doubt which actual shot actually killed either of the victims.
mai naem mobile
@Roger Moore: well, duh,.he didn’t bleach.his skin!
A guy
Flash a fake gun at a cop no matter your age and see what happens! Flash it at me and your dead.
Omnes Omnibus
@A guy: I want better capering.
A guy
Yes Jim, an this weekend I was in the southeast running my baseball team. Let the government pay your way. I’ll keep moving forward
Chris
New troll?
Baud
@A guy:
I’d like to pay you to take a trip to the Bundy Ranch.
different-church-lady
@A guy: Run along, sonny, the adults are trying to talk.
Valdivia
@Chris:
looks like it.
gwangung
@A guy: Dont insult our intelligence.
Do better.
Baud
@different-church-lady:
With talk like that, you’re likely to get shot…
And you’d deserve it, apparently.
JPL
@A guy: hahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahhahah
JPL
@TaMara (BHF): I believe most police officers are still guardians of peace but in some locations that is simply not true.
Andrey
Probably a new troll. On the off chance he’s serious, though, I suppose the obvious really does need to be stated: no, people don’t deserve to die for committing a crime. Committing a crime does not make you a non-human. Further, “A guy”, I guarantee that you and every family member you have has committed at least ten crimes, probably just this year. Are you sure you’re ok with each and every one of those getting a death sentence? Or is it ok because you’re not that “kind” of criminal?
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@Chris: I suspect it’s the same shrewd and highly successful business owner who told us a while back he had to use his Discover card to meet payroll. This weekend he watched a Clint Eastwood marathon and, apparently, Bull Durham. And maybe given the new lawyer fantasy, some of the Law and Order marathon I assume some cable channel had going? It’s like I Love Lucy or MASH, always on somewhere.
A guy
Doesn’t take much intelligence to figure out if you don’t commit crimes, and your stay away from crime, you won’t get shot. Now, if I’m insulting intelligence with that statement it’s obvious you all had public education.
Valdivia
Boy just the other day I was complaining about our troll quality, reminiscing about our old ones and now we have this new one. Hmm.
Baud
@Valdivia: So it’s your fault?
A guy
Anybody here every kill a deer with a bow, a rifle and a muzzleloader in the same season?
A guy
Troll=things that prove ur wrong
Steeplejack
@efgoldman:
Just set my DVR.
gwangung
@efgoldman: Nah, too stupid and inarticulate.
Baud
@A guy: Oh, hi DougJ.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@A guy: damn, that was one tough deer.
different-church-lady
@efgoldman: Hell, those types are a dime a dozen. However, it does seem like his/her kind of shtick.
I was tempted to throw out a “Knock it off, Doug J”, but it was far too lacking in subtly to be him.
different-church-lady
@A guy: You mean this week?
A guy
No that’s out of season. So if you killed any let me know so I can inform dnr
Valdivia
@Baud:
I’m feeling a little bit like I conjured it. A la Beetlejuice.
hhis
Steeplejack
@A guy:
We need a troll vetting committee or something. (Not that I’m volunteering to be on it.) Quality has really gone to hell.
Chris
New troll.
different-church-lady
@A guy: Pff. Seasons are for wimps.
Steeplejack
@A guy:
Maybe if you got good with one, you wouldn’t need all three to kill one deer.
Baud
@Valdivia: Probably auditioning for a permanent Koch Bros. gig. If we get a troll we like, we should act all upset and flustered so that he gets the job. I don’t think this one makes the cut, however.
different-church-lady
@Chris:
It’s all in how you approach it.
phein39
There is only one way to get police to change their behavior: Hit’em in the wallet.
How to do that?
Make all brutality/wrongful death payments come out of their paychecks, in some way shape or form: Decrease their retirement funds? Decreases in pay to everyone above patrolman?
It would take some serious Federal legislation to make it happen, so we’ll never see it, but one can dream.
Chris
@Steeplejack:
I think as with many things, we’re remembering the past as better than it actually was.
Omnes Omnibus
@Steeplejack: It was the Chuck Norris of Cervidae.
Valdivia
@Baud:
I like how you think. Yes we need much better quality to adopt one and try to keep it.
A guy
This troll has a job. Self employed. Pays 100 percent of his employees health insurance premiums. Raise ur hand if you do. Mine is up.
Mary G
Remember the guy with the helicopters and credenza? Now, that was a troll.
Omnes Omnibus
@Steeplejack: I keep asking it to caper for us with no real result, just this lumbering and shuffling.
Baud
First rule of trolling — Never, ever try to prove you’re not a troll. It destroys the illusion.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@A guy: Raise ur hand if you do.
Gave up on figuring out the whole “your/you’re” conundrum, did you? I’m sure the teachers at Cranbrook are proud.
Chris
@Baud:
“I am not a witch!”
If you’re explaining, you’re losing.
Valdivia
@Mary G:
Oh that was epic
‘The helicopters are not laughing’
schrodinger's cat
@Chris: Old troll, new handle. Style seems vaguely familiar.
Baud
@Chris:
Haha. Exactly.
Omnes Omnibus
@Valdivia: Does this new troll mean we need to start faxing furniture to Cole again?
Chris
@efgoldman:
Whatever happened to grinning them down?
Omnes Omnibus
@efgoldman: I have a giant blue ox named Babe.
@Chris: He didn’t say how he killed it. Grinning it to death is on the menu.
Monkeyfister
Hopefully, this HARD BIT will take, and serve as an example to the rest of the Nation’s Brown… err… Blue Shirts, and decide once and for all just WHOM they “Serve and Protect.”
different-church-lady
@Monkeyfister: So you’re cheering for the Lightning to take the series tonight?
schrodinger's cat
@Omnes Omnibus: I thought Babe was a pig.
SiubhanDuinne
@Valdivia:
I’m so bored with these new trolls, I’m tempted to write a stern letter to the management and insist they return to their former level of quality. Standards have really slipped around here.
ms_canadada
@efgoldman: So you really are Davy Crockett, King of the Wild Frontier! But I need to know – were you born on a mountain top in Tennessee?
Valdivia
@Omnes Omnibus:
if this troll starts swearing to his credenzas I might just die laughing.
@SiubhanDuinne:
I know, I mean, can we have a recruitment program or something?
SiubhanDuinne
@Mary G:
Oh yes. Best. Troll. EVAH.
opiejeanne
@schrodinger’s cat: different story: see Paul Bunyan.
ms_canadada
@schrodinger’s cat: Hmmm…I thought Babe was a baseball player or sumpin’.
opiejeanne
@SiubhanDuinne: I totally missed that one, dammit.
SiubhanDuinne
@Valdivia:
At least an unpaid internship before a permanent gig is offered.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@schrodinger’s cat: I thought the pig was Wilbur. Some pig.
SiubhanDuinne
@opiejeanne:
It was epic. October 15, 2009 if you feel like diving into the archives.
Omnes Omnibus
@schrodinger’s cat: Are you unfamiliar with the legend of Paul Bunyan? Or are you riffing?
Valdivia
@SiubhanDuinne:
yes, an apprenticeship. I guess there is no troll guild we could draw talent from.
@opiejeanne:
definitely worth reading it if you missed it. Best thread ever.
opiejeanne
@efgoldman: has it been 60 years? The boys in my neighborhood either had Mohawk haircuts or wore ‘coonskin caps, an a couple had both.
opiejeanne
@Valdivia: thank you both. I was on this site by then but didn’t attend regularly until 2011. I read but didn’t post much.
opiejeanne
@efgoldman: I just turned 65. I can still sing the theme song, but I might have been 5.
sharl
@Mary G:
Haha, I had forgotten about him. Although his trolling was more of an unintended variety I think – he seemed genuinely upset that folks here were making jokes over the whole Balloon Boy thing (once the kid was found to be safe). I just had to find the comment where that all began:
His efforts to shame the commenters into somber reflection had quite the opposite effect there.
I guess he was a troll in the sense that he massively disrupted the comments, but the resulting entertainment more than made up for the disruption.
different-church-lady
Did we ever get to see the graduation documents from the Explosive Ordnance Disposal School?
Omnes Omnibus
@different-church-lady: It turns out they were in the filing cabinet (which was not faxed) rather than the credenza (which was faxed) It was something that could happen to anyone.
Valdivia
@Omnes Omnibus:
I loved that he wanted to fax it. I think if documentation was going to be credenzad today it would be scanned no?
Chris
@opiejeanne:
I work in a little shop here in Florida that sells all kinds of touristy souvenirs and things, for all ages. Among many such items, we still carry coonskin caps. And yes, even in the brave new world of 2015, every now and then somebody actually buys one.
Omnes Omnibus
@Valdivia: It is my understanding (and experts in the field will almost certainly pop up to denounce me as not only wrong but criminally so) that faxes are actually more secure than email.
different-church-lady
@Omnes Omnibus: Well, so much for his bonofides.
Omnes Omnibus
@different-church-lady: It is one of my minor regrets that I missed that thread in real time.
different-church-lady
@Omnes Omnibus: So did I. Where did the credenza bit come in?
Omnes Omnibus
@different-church-lady: In subsequent threads as people riffed off Gass’s original remarks. Jazz commenting.
Omnes Omnibus
@efgoldman: Sharl posted the link above.
Valdivia
@Omnes Omnibus:
probably true, and I am sure businesses still use them for this reason.
Though I like the idea of scanning a credenza. You could 3D print it later.
sharl
@different-church-lady:
I actually made a half-hearted stab at finding that reference, but came up empty. I DO remember seeing that at the time though – clearly he intended to say ‘credentials’ – so I dunno. I may have just missed it in my search, or maybe Cole or someone took mercy on him and deleted the credenza comment, or fixed it at his request.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Omnes Omnibus
@sharl: Gass never said that the helicopters weren’t laughing either, but that is no longer the point. It has entered Liberty Valence territory.
different-church-lady
@Omnes Omnibus: No, he merely said the helicopters “didn’t make jokes“
ms_canadada
@(I wanted one for me) efgoldman: Well I’m 61, but I had older siblings. In 1989 we took our sons to Disneyland and bought them coonskin hats. They hadn’t a clue, but my husband and I were thrilled. I’m also of the generation when we played cowboys and Indians – hope I’m not offending anyone- but we had real Indians as my adopted cousins were Ojibway. And we made real bows and arrows. My brother who played a cowboy, shot me in the leg with his BB gun. We were kind of wild on my grandparents’ farm. The good old days!
Mnemosyne (tablet)
@A guy:
Oh, hey, it’s Steve again. Either that, or there’s an epidemic of conservative business owners who can’t manage to meet payroll without putting it on their credit cards.
As I mentioned before, I don’t have to own a business because my dad did. He apparently was much better at it than you since he never had to put payroll on a credit card and made enough to retire early.
Being a business owner doesn’t mean much if you suck at it.
ms_canadada
@Omnes Omnibus: But the point of a gun was the only law that Liberty understood, right?
(I absolutely love Gene Pitney)
Omnes Omnibus
@different-church-lady: Exactly. Some things took on a life of their own.
Steeplejack (phone)
@Chris:
Probably true, alas.
Steeplejack (phone)
@Omnes Omnibus:
Walker, Texas Reindeer.
sharl
@Omnes Omnibus:
Yeah, you are probably correct.
Omnes Omnibus
@efgoldman: I am of two minds about m_c. She was obviously bright (and I tend to equate bright with not stupid – often to my detriment) and sometimes insightful. OTOH, she was vicious and racist. As a side note on this, Amir has probably taken serious steps toward a spiritual reward for his forbearance in dealing with her.
@Steeplejack (phone): Pure win.
Chris
@Steeplejack (phone):
C’est la vie.
@Omnes Omnibus:
Holy understatement, Batman!
Omnes Omnibus
@Chris: I don’t know enough about the tenets of Islam to make definitive statements.
@efgoldman: He seems to be one of the few thoroughly decent people who posts here. I mean no insult to anyone else, but most of us have our less than stellar moments; he has far, far, fewer than anyone I can think of.
sharl
@sharl: On the ‘credenza’ bit: although I never found a Comment Zero by Mr. Gass where that word was used, it did show up in the comments to posts that followed over the next few days. So the
credentials-credenzas business was hatched by one or more people here shortly after that Balloon Boy post.Amir Khalid
You guys are so sweet …
Ruckus
@Omnes Omnibus:
He might just have a properly working self edit function.
Which would still be a pretty big deal.
Steeplejack
@sharl:
The earliest comment I could find was from Calling All Toasters the next day, a few threads after the original one:
But the whole thing seems to have gotten really cemented into Balloon Juice legend in another thread later that day:
Lots of comments in that thread about whether the helicopters were laughing, not joking—or even crying.
SiubhanDuinne put it all together:
So the BJ hive mind was thoroughly infected within 24 hours.
Steeplejack
@Steeplejack:
Damn it! Too many links. Taking one out:
@sharl:
The earliest comment I could find was from Calling All Toasters the next day, a few threads after the original one:
But the whole thing seems to have gotten really cemented into Balloon Juice legend in another thread later that day:
Lots of comments in that thread about whether the helicopters were laughing, not joking—or even crying.
SiubhanDuinne put it all together:
So the BJ hive mind was thoroughly infected within 24 hours.
Steeplejack
I am an idiot, but FYWP. One last time:
@sharl:
The earliest comment I could find was from Calling All Toasters the next day, a few threads after the original one:
But the whole thing seems to have gotten really cemented into Balloon Juice legend in another thread later that day:
Lots of comments in that thread about whether the helicopters were laughing, not joking—or even crying.
SiubhanDuinne put it all together:
So the BJ hive mind was thoroughly infected within 24 hours.
sharl
@Steeplejack: Hahaha, thanks for tracking that stuff down. I felt regretful after doing my anal retentive earnest commenter thing, along the lines of killing a joke by explaining it. I think you done restored the fun of those Ye Olde commenter exchanges. Well done, sir!
opiejeanne
@Steeplejack: That was awesome! I didn’t see “credenzas” but I did see “condensation” and was glad that someone finally figured out that he meant “condescension” because I was busy laughing at the absurdity of it all and that went right past me.
different-church-lady
@Steeplejack: Ah, so the real action was in the following day’s thread.
different-church-lady
I’m so going to start using “Bring your condensation.“
bjacques
@efgoldman: After another 60+ years, people will think “credenza” is the last name of George from Seinfeld.
For awhile it looked like the UNLIMITED CORPORATE CA$H for trolls was drying up. evidently not, and a good thing too, because the money will come in handy when ur paying 100% of you’re employees health insurance.