Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I’d hate to be the candidate who lost to this guy.

SCOTUS: It’s not “bribery” unless it comes from the Bribery region of France. Otherwise, it’s merely “sparkling malfeasance”.

Celebrate the fucking wins.

It’s all just conspiracy shit beamed down from the mothership.

Jack Smith: “Why did you start campaigning in the middle of my investigation?!”

Books are my comfort food!

Motto for the House: Flip 5 and lose none.

I have other things to bitch about but those will have to wait.

One lie, alone, tears the fabric of reality.

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

Let me file that under fuck it.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

the 10% who apparently lack object permanence

Imperialist aggressors must be defeated, or the whole world loses.

Republicans: slavery is when you own me. freedom is when I own you.

When they say they are pro-life, they do not mean yours.

The republican caucus is covering themselves with something, and it is not glory.

If you thought you’d already seen people saying the stupidest things possible on the internet, prepare yourselves.

Everybody saw this coming.

There are no moderate republicans – only extremists and cowards.

When your entire life is steeped in white supremacy, equality feels like discrimination.

We’re watching the self-immolation of the leading world power on a level unprecedented in human history.

“The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.”

Not loving this new fraud based economy.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Florida sucks, but…

Reader Interactions

123Comments

  2. 2.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    are you reporting live?

    Jesus, the images from that SoCal fire are incredible. They’ve gone from reporting 500 to 2000 acres in the last fifteen minutes

  4. 4.

    Betty Cracker

    @shell: Weeki Wachee is still around and is actually in my usual stomping grounds, but they never served alcohol, alas. This is a joint in South FL.

  6. 6.

    Another Holocene Human

    Florida sucks but it has tropical plants so there is this unavoidable pull from my wife to go further south.

    I broke out in hives the last time I was south of Orlando. It was pretty impressive.

  7. 7.

    Felonius Monk

    It’s always a good day for mermaids, but where are the mermen? Some might want to know.

  12. 12.

    Howard Beale IV

    I’m waiting for the pedi-pub’s between Miami and Cuba. You know it’ll happen…..

  13. 13.

    Gvg

    Florida has its eccentric side not connected to toxic idiots. As a kid, my dad caught venomous snakes and sold them to silver springs, who milked the snakes to make anti venom. also caught smaller alligators in a canoe, alive, to them. he did not allow us to do these things when we were growing up. I have to say, I don’t recall even as a young child, thinking these things were a good idea. I think my dad was always a bit nuts.

  15. 15.

    Schlemazel

    I have an odd question. We had to have an old oak tree taken down today, it had no leaves this year.. It has these odd spots in it and I am wondering if anyone has seen this or could explain what caused it.

    http://imgur.com/a/uJiVS

    They are dark blue to purple color & almost look like they were spray painted but were there when the tree was diced up.

    ANyone have any ideas? Thanks

  17. 17.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    DH and I just got back from our anniversary dinner (actual day was 7-14) we went to the Angry Ginger a new Irish Pub in town which serves absolutely kick ass bangers and mash with genuine Irish sausages. They also have Harp beer on draft which makes DH a happy camper.

  20. 20.

    Ruckus

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:
    Worse is that we have been pretty lucky with brush fires the last few years out here in shakytown. Not exceptionally lucky there have been some but at some point a lot is going to burn. It would be nice if it didn’t but it always has and it always will. Have a friend who is a ranger in the mountains west of that fire area and he said he caught 3 or 4 people setting fires/campfires out of hand over the 4th weekend. There are a lot of insane people out there, some of them like fire.

  22. 22.

    jl

    @Greg: I was going to thank you for the tip on Dive Bar in Sacto, I was thinking of dropping by next time I was in the area. But their pics of mermaids make them look like vampires. The FL mermaids look wholesome innocent and sweet, just like Florida itself!

  24. 24.

    Roger Moore

    @jl:

    The FL mermaids look wholesome innocent and sweet, just like Florida itself!

    This must be a different Florida than the one Florida Man hails from.

  26. 26.

    Major Major Major Major

    Did you guys see this funny piece from the Hillary campaign?

    Hillary Clinton’s No Good, (Record-Breaking, Poll-Winning), Very Bad Week

    If you believe the mood and headlines from some of the press, it’s been a pretty rough week for Hillary Clinton. While there was widespread and substantive coverage of the rollout of her economic agenda, politically, it’s a different story. One poll showed so much trouble for Hillary that she only had a higher favorability number than any other candidate it tested.

    Even worse, multiple polls released this week show that she leads every candidate running in head-to-head matchups. While it is widely known that the growing Hispanic electorate is critical in deciding the election, new polling shows that Hillary Clinton has a disastrous 68 percent approval rating among Hispanic voters and only leads her closest Republican competition (Bush) by 37 points, 64% to 27%.

    Not only that, she raised a record amount of primary money for a candidate in their first quarter, with only $8 million (a sum larger than most Republican campaigns raised in total) in donations of less than $200. Hillary also spent too much money building her organization and was only left with more cash on hand than any other campaign raised and more in the bank than the top three Republican campaigns combined.

    It’s true. Hillary is left in the terrible position of having the most resources of any candidate and being voters’ top choice to be the next President of the United States.

  29. 29.

    gbear

    @debit:

    The Mermaid in Mounds View is cool because it’s been there forever. I was in a 60’s band that played in the basement bar at The Mermaid in the late 70’s and it was a goog gig for a weeknight. It was almost always fun.

  30. 30.

    HinTN

    We have a mermaid fetish in our house. One folk art mermaid painted on a sliding glass window, two LARGE mer-person folk art cut from boards and painted with glitter, etc., and a massive piece of Zimbabwe tribal art done sculpture (“Woman of the Waves”) on the floor in our dining room; not to mention the mermaid of cut metal on painted board on the veranda. So yes, BC, your mermaid bar resonates here in the hinterlands.

  33. 33.

    Major Major Major Major

    Oh, why couldn’t she be the other kind of mermaid, with the fish part on the top and the lady part on the bottom?

    Fry from Futurama, upon learning that sex with his new mermaid girlfriend mostly involves fertilizing eggs alone.

  34. 34.

    jnfr

    We took Mr. J’s parents to a combo aquarium/mermaid restaurant in Denver and actually it was a lot of very cheesy fun.

  35. 35.

    Schlemazel

    @gbear:
    used to stop there for drinks after work in the 70s, it was a fun atmosphere then. We have not been there in 40-some years

  37. 37.

    Another Holocene Human

    @shell: Lol, when I find something to write home about in Orlando that isn’t an IKEA or my godson’s latest antics, I’ll let you know.

    eta: I’m being mean, I like the new Harry Potter attraction in Universal Islands of Adventure but I’m sure I liked it more because I got in for free

  39. 39.

    Another Holocene Human

    @Gvg: They did one of those Deadly Attraction shows on Animal Planet about this young lady who wanted to work with snakes and was working in the lab milking venom but got bit multiple times. They kind of implied she was partially responsible for the attacks but who knows, it’s Florida, where worker safety isn’t even ideal, never mind a reality.

  40. 40.

    lamh36

    Alright, alright, alright! My youngest little sister (I practically raised her) changed her wedding date and looks like I’ll be able to make it.

    I had bought tickets for Aug 20 just to visit friends and my sister after the wedding, but I just switched my tickets to the new date and apparently Southwest has ANOTHER sale! And it was cheaper than the first sale I got. Shoot, I came out with a $16 credit!

    Shit, this was me, when I saw that $16 credit.

    http://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lramsrRzVk1r2miyso1_500.gif

    I just KNEW I’d have to pay for a higher rate, but nope

  42. 42.

    Iowa Old Lady

    @Another Holocene Human: I loved the Harry Potter attraction. Walking down Diagon Alley I felt the same way I did when we went to Hobbiton in New Zealand, and I came up over the hill and saw the party tree. I ran toward it, shrieking, “Take a picture of me by the tree! Take a picture of me by the tree!”

    Dignity is way over-rated.

  46. 46.

    Bobby B.

    @Roger Moore: When you see Mermaids wearing tops you know you’re in America, the only non-moslem country to arrest people for a little boobity

  47. 47.

    Eric S.

    Tonight is the last night of the Florida Vacation for me. The Girl and I hit the road for Chicago tomorrow morning. She was hoping for one last beach day but rain all day nixed that. I would have gone and enjoyed it but my tender, pink chest is probably better for it.

  49. 49.

    lamh36

    @Another Holocene Human: YES! It was last minute change when I realized I would be able to go, and money is TAWT right now, but I was gonna pay the increased rate anyway so I could see her walk down the aisle.

  52. 52.

    Scott Alloway

    Back in 1995, she-who-must-be-obeyed and I went to a wedding outside San Francisco. Both my parents – both Navy stationed in SF in 1945 where they met an married – insisted I look for a mermaid bar they frequented back then. Can’t remember the name of the place but I was told, when inquiring around town, that it still existed but at a different location. So we have a 70 year history now (damn, feel old). And yes, i have strange and wonderful family. Parents still kicking and siblings and their kids everywhere. Makes me joyful when I think of them all.

  56. 56.

    Tommy

    @Eric S.:

    I would have gone and enjoyed it but my tender, pink chest is probably better for it.

    You are a smart man. My brother and his wife are in Mexico as we speak. Finishing up a week. He didn’t make it past the first day getting so sun burned he can’t really go outside. I was like dude, we are Scottish. You know us and the sun don’t work well together. There is this invention called sun screen, try it sometime.

  57. 57.

    Tree With Water

    @Another Holocene Human: Nope, this is my plan: I don’t intend to replant what they eat. They’ve been here longer than me, and I will adapt to them. I’ve only lived here a year in the redwoods, and neighbors tell me the drought has driven more of them into the neighborhood than ever before. I assume the lack of water has impacted their daily search for food, but just wish they stick with the fallen plums from my tree. They fall by the bushelful, or so it seems, so the deer do me a favor eating them so I don’t have to pick them up. My house is also short walk from the Russian River (Sonoma County, Ca.), and every creature needs water… and there are a lot of critters hereabouts, I’m happy to say.

  58. 58.

    Tommy

    @SatanicPanic: I don’t read TMZ. Gawker is kind of my only online guilty pleasure for gossip and stuff. What the heck is going on over there?

  60. 60.

    Tommy

    @Tree With Water: Good for you. I have the opposite problem where I live. We have too many deer. They tend not to invade my garden even though I live across from a 5,000-acre field that is surrounding by a forest that goes for miles. This wasn’t always the case so my state got somewhat anal about changing the way we did things so we had more, not less deer. At some levels maybe we were a little too successful :).

  62. 62.

    SatanicPanic

    @Tommy: I don’t get it. woe is us, management yanked our incredibly ill-advised story and is taking our journalistic freedom is really not going to get them a whole lot of sympathy.

  66. 66.

    Keith G

    @SatanicPanic: What the editorial guys at Gawker did was so wrong that it left a jaded cynic as myself speechless. The decision to run that story was scummy idiocy on steroids.

    I am glad the post got pulled. Now the firings should begin.

  67. 67.

    Tommy

    @SatanicPanic: @Omnes Omnibus: I am actually kind of happy I missed that whole thing yesterday. Look I am all for freedom of speech. My MA is in Journalism. Heck there have been times I pissed you off Omnes Omnibus. Never my intent, but if an editor or somebody would have said, “stop that Tommy, don’t post that” I would have been better served. If the “grown ups” in the room think you shouldn’t post something, out a guy by the person attempting to blackmail them, maybe they have a point.

  72. 72.

    jl

    @Elizabelle: Well, the totally private person with no public history with the totally private family with no public history was related to a formerly public but now private person … so, I guess by the principle of transitive BS they thought there was some reason to publish it.

  73. 73.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    e said he caught 3 or 4 people setting fires/campfires out of hand over the 4th weekend.

    Sweet christ. The stupid fucking things people convince themselves are some kind of birthright or necessity– campfires, fireworks, green lawns*– never ceases to amaze me.

    *cheap gas, big cars, house in the exurbs….

  74. 74.

    different-church-lady

    @Elizabelle:

    Basically, they outed a publishing executive for no good reason.

    Wait, being a bunch of “new-media” assholes isn’t a good reason anymore?

  76. 76.

    Tommy

    @Elizabelle: And that is where it is wrong on many levels. If the person was a public person. Elected official. Running a publicly traded company MAYBE you out him and publish the story. Maybe! But he is just some random dude trying to get laid.

  77. 77.

    the Conster

    That North Fire in CA is bad juju. The whole west is reverting to arid desert, and people will start moving away if they can. After the Seattle earthquake story, how many people will start moving away from there, or will not move there? The future is here.

  78. 78.

    Gravenstone

    @Tree With Water: I posted this at the end of the previous thread as a suggestion: Put up hair bags (small sacks of human hair clippings in nylons) on the affected plants. The smell of humans will repel the deer.

  79. 79.

    raven

    So they sell you a two year contract for Dish Network and then you find out NONE of the regional Fox sports networks, including the one that have the Braves, show the major league games that are on those networks. Motherfuckers..

  80. 80.

    SatanicPanic

    @Tommy: yeah, but for some stupid reason, even though most of them are claiming they didn’t like the story, on principle they object to the business team pulling it. They’ve somehow made me side with the business side of their operation. Good work Gawker writers!

  81. 81.

    Tommy

    @SatanicPanic: How about it. You have to try really hard for me to side with the business people over the journalist. I mean really, really hard. But they just did it.

  83. 83.

    Botsplainer

    @SatanicPanic:

    I was just over there, reading in “what the fucking fuck” mode after reasoning that Gawker’s risible dumbassery of yesterday could get no worse. Boy, was I ever wrong..

  84. 84.

    Joel

    @SatanicPanic: Yeah, seriously. This is probably the best summation of my feelings:

    Many on the Jezebel staff were rubbed the wrong way by the piece Gawker ran last night. In both individual and group discussions today, staffers registered objections to the piece’s publication in the first place and general discomfort with the way it was approached.

    But despite the objectionable nature of a post, taking something down entirely after publishing—no matter how distasteful—is dishonest.

    But my favorite comment is:

    Yeah, no. You immoral assclowns obviously aren’t grown up enough to make these decisions by yourselves. This should be a motherfucking apology you scumbags.

  86. 86.

    Botsplainer

    @Elizabelle:

    Basically, they outed a publishing executive for no good reason.

    Oh, they had a reason. Conde Nast is a business competitor.

    It may be a shitty reason, but it is, nonetheless, a reason.

  88. 88.

    Tommy

    @Joel: Libel and/or slander is a hard thing to prove in court. Almost impossible. But from reading the cached post linked here this might be a pretty clear cut case. Think the business folks were like “shit, this could be a thing. WTF are you thinking.” Gawker deals in rumors and gossip. But this is a private person, not a public person. The law is clear there is a difference between the two.

  89. 89.

    dexwood

    Mermaid bars. Who knew? Now, if only my town’s mayor would give some lucky developer the OK for one on the Rio Grande people might forget about the millions paid out to the families of those killed by cops.

  94. 94.

    PaulW

    @shell:
    Weeki Wachee is open but is a state-run park now. It’s not exactly out in a tourist mecca area for one… the region (Hernando/Citrus Counties) is building up more, but it’s about a 90 minute drive at BEST from St. Pete/Clearwater/Tampa, so it’s hard to get to.

    On the other hand, it’s one of the remaining pure roadside attractions left in Florida.

  96. 96.

    Tommy

    @Origuy: I have to mow my lawn twice a week. So much rain. Wish I could send it westward. But if I didn’t have a lot of rain and my lawn started to die, pretty sure I could deal with it. Not even worry that much.

  99. 99.

    Gvg

    @Tree With Water: I don’t know if it will help or hurt but you might consider a kiddie wading pool. when we had drought conditions here in Florida, I discovered the critters were eating my hoses, evidently to get to the little water they could smell inside. I put out a cheap pool of water with Mosquito dunks, and they left my hoses alone. sometimes water is harder to get than food at least safely. Not crossing roads or predictor areas etc.

  101. 101.

    Tommy

    @Gvg: That is such a foreign concept to me. I got a rain barrel outside. 66 gallons I use to water my garden and plants. I often have to open up the drain so it doesn’t backup and flood the area.

  102. 102.

    Groucho48

    @Howard Beale IV:

    Looks like the guy had no insurance coverage and seems to be applying for Medi-Cal. Wonder if he’s another right winger who refused to get insurance because FREEDOM?

  105. 105.

    Jasmine Bleach

    Holy bagezzus!

    Pliny the Elder beer has to be the best beer ever.

    Having one now!

  107. 107.

    Jparente

    @Mike J: Coney Island, Brooklyn, NY has an awsome Mermaid Parade! It is also the junk food capital of the world. And, IMHO, Totono’s Pizza is the best Pizza in NYC, hence the best pizza in the world! Full disclosure: I am a Pizza Snob. However, the worst pizza is still good eating! When I refer to Pizza, I’m not refering to Papa John’s, Domino’s, Pizza Hut, Little Ceaser’s or any of the other facist franchises.
    Sorry for the editorial.

  113. 113.

    Tree With Water

    @Gvg: That’s a great thought, thanks, but it’s one I’ve had covered for the past week after buying a bird bath. In fact a couple of days ago I watched a doe take a quick sip and then go back to eating the plums… which naturally puts me in mind of Marisa Tomei discussing deer hunting with Joe Pesci- “A little deer, taking a little sip of water with its little tongue, and then blam! Some sonofabitch blows your head off!”.

  114. 114.

    ? Martin

    @the Conster: The Lake Fire still isn’t fully contained. It started one month ago today. Thankfully only 30,000 acres.

    I’m hoping the rains arrive before the santa anas, or else this year will be a nightmare.

  118. 118.

    J R in WV

    @Schlemazel:

    I think you should call the state forestry office and get someone to take a look at that. There are a number of exotic threats to native forest species that arrive from overseas and kill things.

    Emerald ash borer looks to be going to make the ash tree extinct in our lifetime. So no more baseball bats, no more tool handles, etc.

    That was a really big senior tree, and for it to just die off, that’s weird and scary. Save some pieces and call them Monday morning and ask for help. I’ll bet someone expert shows up right away.

  119. 119.

    J R in WV

    @Howard Beale IV:

    A friend of mine got a bill for $67,000 for a copperhead bite.

    Another friend w/o insurance got pain killers and antibiotics, and no anti-venom, because they wouldn’t get any reimbursement, and would be unable to replace the anti-venom they would have used on him.

    Our health-care system suckxs pretty bad!

  120. 120.

    opiejeanne

    @Betty Cracker: We visited Weeki-Watchee! A friend from a now-dead forum met us at Homosassa Springs and showed us the sights. Florida seen through the eyes of a native of Los Angeles County is a weird and wonderful place.

  121. 121.

    opiejeanne

    @Tommy: Nice. It rains where you are, it hasn’t rained in months in Western Washington. Hard to collect it in rain barrels if there is no rain.

  122. 122.

    Gvg

    @Tommy: Things change. Florida really is swampy and has lakes streams and water all over the place….until a bad drought. that was an odd year and NASA photographed our fires from space. It looked like the whole state was barbecued. Huge cloud of smoke trailing west from the whole peninsula. next year was normal with rain almost everyday in summer. that drought year also had a lot more wildlife than normal hit by cars. Experts said animals were looking for water. Hit by cars included fairly large alligators which can also seriously mess up cars. A few years later we had a overly wet year and the alligators were swimming over the roadside fences and on to the highways to get hit again. We had to increase the height of some fences but both years had some interesting photos in the papers. I guess it’s good the alligator numbers have rebounded from the lows in the 70’s because frankly they aren’t that bright.

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