Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Republicans want to make it harder to vote and easier for them to cheat.

When tyranny becomes law, rebellion becomes duty. ~Thomas Jefferson

Radicalized white males who support Trump are pitching a tent in the abyss.

“Facilitate” is an active verb, not a weasel word.

Wake up. Grow up. Get in the fight.

Our messy unity will be our strength.

They want us to be overwhelmed and exhausted. Focus. Resist. Oppose.

The desire to stay informed is directly at odds with the need to not be constantly enraged.

Rupert, come get your orange boy, you petrified old dinosaur turd.

The gop is a fucking disgrace.

When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.

Narcissists are always shocked to discover other people have agency.

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

Black Jesus loves a paper trail.

SCOTUS: It’s not “bribery” unless it comes from the Bribery region of France. Otherwise, it’s merely “sparkling malfeasance”.

Sitting here in limbo waiting for the dice to roll

People are complicated. Love is not.

Human rights are not a matter of opinion!

Giving in to doom is how authoritarians win.

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

Come on, man.

The most dangerous place for a black man in America is in a white man’s imagination.

Republicans: “Abortion is murder but you can take a bus to get one.” Easy peasy.

They think we are photo bombing their nice little lives.

You are here: Home / Politics / Republican Stupidity / Soundtrack for the GOP Debate

Soundtrack for the GOP Debate

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Couldn’t find a better choice than this:

 

I think they should cue up the change at about 1:20 for everytime the Donald or his tame scalp tribble commits an utterance.
–
BTW — in case you’re wondering, those are theramins inside the matryoshas.  And yes, the world is not only stranger than we thought, it is stranger than it is possible to imagine.  See also Florida.
 –
Alternative GOP appropriate musical suggestions, anyone?

Reader Interactions

142Comments

  4. 4.

    dmsilev

    So, if Trump’s scalp thing decides to mate with Rand Paul’s scalp thing, what are our options to save humanity from the offspring?

    I’m going with the classics: “I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.”

  5. 5.

    voldemort

    Am I the only one to notice that they have scheduled this debate for the 70th anniversary of Hiroshima Day?

    How appropriate…

  7. 7.

    boatboy_srq

    @dmsilev: The GOTea’s opposition to LGBT rights, SSM etc stems from fear of such an event as the union of scalp things.

  8. 8.

    The Dangerman

    Anything by Insane Clown Posse would probably be the most appropriate.

    ETA: I mean, Donald Trump; really, Republicans?

  12. 12.

    Thunderbird

    “They’re Coming to Take Me Away, Ha-Haaa!” by Napoleon XIV is the first thing that popped into my brain.

  17. 17.

    bystander

    I vote for the guy with the Sousaphone who followed the KKK marchers around. Plus a long sad trombone to punctuate the “I hate Obummer” speeches.

  18. 18.

    Kropadope

    @JPL:

    Unless the candidates decide to bring guns, I’m not going to watch.

    Oddly enough, Republican leaders and leaders of Republican-affiliated organizations like the NRA don’t allow guns where they’re congregating. Shocking, I know.

  22. 22.

    bystander

    Christie was supposedly booed vociferously at the Haskell last weekend. Where in the heck is the video? 60,000 people booing Outlaw Jersey Whale has awesome written all over it.

  24. 24.

    piratedan

    I dunno, maybe I could see a campaign video using Carly Simon’s “You’re So Vain” being used to great effect here….

  26. 26.

    ThresherK (GPad)

    Yakety Sax is chase music. See Rand Paul fleeing from his hamburger when a member of the riff raff he chats with turns out to be a DREAMer.

    The Merry Go Round Broke Down is my choice, especially for the title.

  27. 27.

    Elizabelle

    PBO just up for speech on Iran deal. American University.

    ETA: blamed the short delay: “even Presidents have trouble with toner.”

    Talking about JFK’s speech at AU years ago, and the prospects then of nuclear war. World was more dangerous then.

  28. 28.

    the Conster

    Trump promises to attack anyone who criticizes him, so yeah, he’s like a grenade with the pin pulled, and everyone gets a chance to hold it. Glad I bought popcorn.

  29. 29.

    Elizabelle

    JFK rejected prevailing attitude that equated security with a perpetual war footing. Sound familiar?

  30. 30.

    dmsilev

    Well, for the foreign policy section of the debate, I think the Mars movement from Holst’s The Planets would be appropriate. Since “The Bringer of War” is pretty much the universal description of all of the GOP candidates’ approach to foreign policy.

  31. 31.

    Elizabelle

    It’s a good speech (what else would I say?), defense of strong, principled and pragmatic diplomacy.

    Kind of a “words of one syllable” speech, given his opponents and their fatuous arguments …

    ETA: talking about “tens of millions of dollars” of advertising.

    And ‘the same people who made the case for the war in Iraq are now opposing the Iran nuclear deal.”

    Talking about the mindset that’s allowed US to step on its own dick, again and again. (He put it more elegantly, of course…)

  33. 33.

    Splitting Image

    Alternative GOP appropriate musical suggestions, anyone?

    They can sing a chorus of Kill the Wabbit. Republicans are pretty much committed to solving problems with their spear and magic helmet.

  34. 34.

    Elizabelle

    Hope he doesn’t say anything about Cosby or Cecil the Lion. We will never hear another snippet of this speech aired, if so.

    He’s summing up the cost in death and $$ for Iraq misadventure.

  41. 41.

    RSA

    How cool! I’d always thought of theremins being bigger instruments.

    Also, reading up a bit, I discover that what I’d always thought was a theremin, the sound effects on Forbidden Planet, was something else. The Day the Earth Stood Still, though, that was one.

  46. 46.

    Amir Khalid

    40 comments in, and nobody’s spotted the misspelling of “theremin” yet. We’re slipping, people!

  47. 47.

    Elizabelle

    “lobbyists and pundits were suddenly transformed into armchair nuclear scientists —”

    This is a really good speech.

    “If you repeat these [fatuous] arguments enough, they can achieve traction…

    and by the way, nuclear material is not something you can hide in the closet.”

    (laughter)

    Opponents getting a deserved smackdown.

  48. 48.

    srv

    Hopefully Trump & Walker will demand their 35% time and then walk off the stage saying they don’t have time for the cuckservatory’s performance.

  54. 54.

    Gin & Tonic

    @Amir Khalid: Maybe the commenters just look at Tom’s position with the Massachusetts Institute of Typing and assume that he couldn’t have made an error.

  56. 56.

    piratedan

    upon reflection and inspiration from my fellow commentators, perhaps a bit of Madness ‘One Step Beyond’ would be a more apropos theme song…. no lyrics, because they can’t remember any and it has a certain manic quality signifying nothing that seems very appropriate.

  57. 57.

    gogol's wife

    @efgoldman:

    There’s one version of that on YouTube that has hilarious comments, based on the fact that the composer is Fucik (pronounced FOO-cheek in Czech, but still).

  58. 58.

    Elizabelle

    @the Conster: He is.

    Cannot wait to see what our media overlords do to misreport this speech. It’s carefully written, and very straightforward.

    Maybe they’ll be shaking their heads over Obama’s “controversial” speech?

  60. 60.

    PaulW

    I vote for Macarena.

    Stuck on loop.

    And only the people in the auditorium hear it, it doesn’t broadcast over the air.

    Also, lock the doors and bolt them with chains once everyone is inside.

  61. 61.

    Elizabelle

    “So in that sense, the critics are right: Walk away from this deal and you will get a better deal. For Iran.”

    Applause.

    Now the spectre of another war in the Middle East.

  62. 62.

    NotMax

    Off the top o’ the noggin:

    “Lies” by the Knickerbockers

    “21st Century Schizoid Man” by King Crimson

    “Wipe Out” by the Surfaris

  63. 63.

    Elizabelle

    “The choice we face is ultimately between diplomacy and some form of war [at some time in the future].”

  64. 64.

    Elizabelle

    “If we’ve learned ANYTHING from the past ten years, it’s that wars in general, and wars in the Middle East in particular, are anything but [simple].”

    Applause.

  65. 65.

    jl

    I like all the suggestions so far. The GOP debates are too big, too strong, for just one genre of music. For one kind of anything. It, nay, they, are just to grand. I say ‘they’ because there are two, yes, TWO debates in one night.

    Do we need anything special for the kiddy table debate. Shirley Temple drinking contest, special music?

    Edit: no, I say everclear for kiddy table debate, since that will put people in proper mood for the main event.

    In honor of the theremin, and the unearthly weirdness, I suggest for both debates

    Louis & Bebe Barron – Battle With The Invisible Monster (Forbidden Planet)
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IkcS7-Heqzo&index=3&list=PLRLCwrdOigtm7KXEfoL7zJCE3EyJ0_ijV

    The whole sound track is there, but I posted Battle with the Invisible Monster, since that will be a recurring theme and this one will come in handy many times.

  68. 68.

    Elizabelle

    “worry less about being called weak. worry more about getting it right.”

    This is a primer on lessons painfully learned from war, which the deal’s opponents have not — or have refused — to learn.

    Applause again, but I missed the line that elicited it …

    Something about “making common cause with the Republican congress.”

    Applause and a whoop from audience.

  69. 69.

    scav

    @Amir Khalid: Well, some of us are still wary because of the discussion of German orthography that broke out recently. This might just be the correct Bavarian of 1907.

  73. 73.

    Elizabelle

    Reagan namechecked; his agreement with the Soviet Union. “Which was riskier,” in scope and scale.

    Reminds that our military is always a backstop.

    [I suppose some of the rhetoric on the other side can be attributed to kneejerk partisanship] but

    another [concern could be]

    affinity to our friend and ally, Israel.

    Throwing a lifeline to congressional Democrats?

  75. 75.

    bystander

    @Elizabelle: Loved how he pointed out that the Repubs allies in screaming about the deal are the Iranian hardliners.

    Did catch a short video on YouTube of Christie being booed. Thanks for the RMS tip.

  79. 79.

    Elizabelle

    @bystander: Thank you. That’s the line I missed. That the audience did not.

    Faces being slapped, right and left, with this speech.

    Sad that more people will see the Fox Trumpathon tomorrow, watching for zingers amidst the Obama and Obamacare are such failures!!! rhetoric

    This speech was zingers for smart people.

    “People who seem to have no compunction (?) with being repeatedly wrong” — audience laughs ….

    Taking on truthiness

  80. 80.

    Phoebe

    I’m just here to say, Thank you for that. I had no idea anything so strange and glorious even existed.

    It’s too good for The Donald, is my only quibble. All that wit and weirdness, no direct pointing and laughing: it’s just not a good thematic match for the occasion.

  82. 82.

    EZSmirkzz

    We are the old Americana
    still getting high on illegal marijuana
    we grew up on the Beatles and nirvana
    now we’re sucking the oligarchy’s banana …

    Or something.

  83. 83.

    Elizabelle

    discussing American exceptionalism now … after gentle reminder that we’re on top now, but maybe not forever

  88. 88.

    Elizabelle

    CNN: Ashleigh Banfield: “that was one big sales pitch.”

    It’s all about the sales pitch. Can Obama sell the deal?

    No discussion yet of the substance … but she says that’s coming now with panel

  90. 90.

    Elizabelle

    Now Ashley’s talking about Obama’s swagger.

    In response to the first guest giving a really good recap of speech content.

    Second guest gets the clue: Obama reduces everything to partisan politics. Everything comes down to that. And maybe he didn’t sell Democrats on it either.

    It’s all conflict and politics! Now an advertisement — a car cane, to help you get in and out of your car. Can hold up to 350 pounds.

  91. 91.

    dexwood

    @Amir Khalid:

    As a child of the 50s, one who loved all the old sci fi soundtracks, I noticed, but didn’t say anything because, hey, shet happens.

  92. 92.

    Elizabelle

    A. Banfield ran out of time — new host up.

    CNN hasn’t digested the Obama Iran speech yet, so they’re opening with Jeb! and Hillary fighting over women’s health.

    ETA: Oh goodie. Gloria Borger.

    What’s on TCM? I could be missing something, like, real.

  93. 93.

    Amir Khalid

    @efgoldman:
    I once saw 4’33” performed on TV: a pianist sat down, put the lid down over the keyboard, folded his arms, and sat there for the duration. I have to say, I didn’t hear any mistakes.

  97. 97.

    Cervantes

    @realbtl:

    Hey, you — cease and desist. That’s a great song, and it has more soul in its first measure than all these yahoos on stage put together.

  99. 99.

    mdblanche

    @voldemort:

    Am I the only one to notice that they have scheduled this debate for the 70th anniversary of Hiroshima Day?

    How appropriate…

    Given that Trump is more of a Fat Man than a Little Boy, perhaps August 9 would have been even more appropriate.

  107. 107.

    boatboy_srq

    @Elizabelle:

    a car cane, to help you get in and out of your car. Can hold up to 350 pounds.

    And across the nation, Hoveround salesbots quiver in panic.

  111. 111.

    boatboy_srq

    @efgoldman: 4’33” on YouTube is a waste. 4’33” in a concert hall, though, is brilliant – unless the concert hall is filled with small children and/or multitasking “professionals” tweeting the whole thing.

  112. 112.

    Frankensteinbeck

    @Chris:
    I see a future where people get on and off the freeway, on and off, off and on, all day, all night! Soon, where Toon Town once stood will be a string of gas stations, restaurants that serve rapidly prepared food, tire salons, automobile dealerships! And wonderful, wonderful billboards, reaching as far as the eye can see.

    My god, it will be beautiful.

    (Does that sound disturbingly like a speech we might hear at the debate to anyone else?)

  114. 114.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Elizabelle: FWIW I just called my Congress people again. Pocan supports the deal. Baldwin does not have an official position yet but sounds promising. Johnson does not have an official position yet but is leaning towards being against the deal. I encouraged them all to support it.

    I mention this as a reminder for others to do the same.

  116. 116.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Frankensteinbeck: Ron Johnson will not support the deal. And I know that mentioning experts during my call probably hurt my cause. Fuck him, he can get my polite call of encouragement now, so that my call lambasting him when comes out against it has been teed up properly.

  118. 118.

    Frankensteinbeck

    @Omnes Omnibus:
    I strongly approve of your strategy, and suggestion others do the same. I am merely making a bitter joke about being represented by two of the most amoral, mean-spirited assholes in the Senate, who could not give a rat’s festering ass about what their constituents want.

  120. 120.

    Elizabelle

    @Omnes Omnibus: Good on you!

    You remind me to call Tim Kaine’s office to thank him for supporting the deal, and to call Mark Warner to see what bipartisan decision he has come to. (Like MW, but he’s a bit too Broderesque and I was not sorry to see him almost get pantsed last election; might concentrate his mind.)

  121. 121.

    Central Planning

    @bystander:

    I vote for the guy with the Sousaphone who followed the KKK marchers around. Plus a long sad trombone to punctuate the “I hate Obummer” speeches.

    I agree. I’m surprised nobody else suggested that. Maybe someone could stand outside the debate location and play like that guy

  124. 124.

    Gin & Tonic

    @Frankensteinbeck: I have a feeling both are fairly representing the interests of their constituents. Your confusion may come from thinking that “people living in their state” is synonymous with “constituents.”

  125. 125.

    Sondra

    @voldemort:
    Good point. I didn’t remember that. For musical accompaniment how about “Carmina Burana”? It’s passe ‘ now, but it suits I think.

  128. 128.

    Central Planning

    @Cervantes:

    How’s the college-bound brat?

    He’s ready to go. I’m ready for him to go – I’m really excited that he’ll be at a place that has smart people and he (in theory) will be able to engage in more discussions/experiments/projects with people like him. We went to campus today (he’s been there before), introduced him to some of the people I deal with there, and tried to track down his academic advisor just to say hi. When I say I hope I don’t see him until Thanksgiving he says the same thing :)

    We’re starting to pack things up, print out forms, etc. I think we’re pretty much ready. It will be weird when the oldest heads out, but I’m sure we’ll get used to it. When I was a kid and we moved, one of the goodbye cards had something in it like “Sometimes leaving is hardest on those left behind.” I didn’t quite get it at the time but I did later on. It certainly will be appropriate in two weeks (13 days, but who’s counting?)

  131. 131.

    jl

    In see on the intertubes that a person can pick up a theremin for 100 bucks online if you shop around. Can make up our own accompaniment at home, spooky was you want it to be.

  133. 133.

    Jay C

    @boatboy_srq:

    Hey! Don’t knock the Car Cane! Mrs. Jay C. – who is WAY below the 350-lb limit for the thing – has a lot of difficulties getting in and out of cars (well, New York cabs, mainly, but that’s another gripe altogether) – a compact brace like the CC just might be a useful thing. That it can, apparently, also be used as a club is quite another useful function….

    @Elizabelle:

    Reading the recaps of PBO’s Iran speech, it strikes me as being another “Obama-hits-one-out-of-the-park” addresses, which will, nonetheless, get diddly-squat-worth of coverage in the “Serious” media, because Donald Trump and “baby parts” and “ovens”, or whatever……

  135. 135.

    Morzer

    Alternative GOP appropriate musical suggestions

    I wanna love you, but I better not touch (Don’t touch)
    I wanna hold you, but my senses tell me to stop
    I wanna kiss you, but I want it too much (Too much)
    I wanna taste you, but your lips are venomous poison
    You’re poison running through my veins
    You’re poison, I don’t wanna break these chains

  137. 137.

    Uncle Cosmo

    @gogol’s wife:

    There’s one version of that on YouTube that has hilarious comments, based on the fact that the composer is Fucik (pronounced FOO-cheek in Czech, but still).

    Now that brings back the memories:

    July 1990. I was in Dresden for a day & a night. (During which I was technically illegal, my visa for the sogenannte DDR [reuni not until the following September] having expired at midnight–but that’s not important right now…)

    Anyhow, a carnival that had set up in Fucikplatz & there were handbills posted everywhere, in a generic Playbill typeface with long thin letters. I kept seeing FUCKPLATZ out of the corner of my eye–my head was on a swivel because WTF???!?!? Neck was sore for the next couple of days. What would you call that–scatological whiplash?

  138. 138.

    Morzer

    On second thoughts, they should just put “Shitty Shitty Bang Bang” on loop and call it a day.

  140. 140.

    Kyle

    I can’t believe no-one has mentioned yet Dennis Leary’s “I’m an Asshole”

    I’m just a regular Joe with a regular job
    I’m your average white suburbanite slob
    I like football and porno and books about war

    I’ve got an average house with a nice hardwood floor
    My wife and my job, my kids and my car
    My feet on my table and a Cuban cigar

    But sometimes that just ain’t enough
    To keep a man like me interested
    (Oh no)
    No way
    (Uh-uh)

    No, I’ve gotta go out and have fun
    At someone else’s expense

    I drive really slow in the ultrafast lane
    While people behind me are going insane

    I’m an asshole
    (He’s an asshole, what an asshole)
    I’m an asshole
    (He’s an asshole, such an asshole)

    I use public toilets and piss on the seat
    I walk around in the summertime saying
    “How about this heat?”

    …..

    (last line) I’m an asshole and proud of it

  142. 142.

    mclaren

    @jl:

    Main theme for Forbidden Planet has optimal mix of unearthly weirdness, drama and grandiosity. I’ll have that at the ready.

    If you’re going for something from the Forbidden Planet soundtrack, the track titled Krell monster attacks would be more appropriate…

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