Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

There is no compromise when it comes to body autonomy. You either have it or you don’t.

with the Kraken taking a plea, the Cheese stands alone.

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

Republican speaker of the house Mike Johnson is the bland and smiling face of evil.

Nothing says ‘pro-life’ like letting children go hungry.

This has so much WTF written all over it that it is hard to comprehend.

Jack be nimble, jack be quick, hurry up and indict this prick.

Everyone is in a bubble, but some bubbles model reality far better than others!

Donald Trump, welcome to your everything, everywhere, all at once.

Many life forms that would benefit from greater intelligence, sadly, do not have it.

Never forget that he train is barreling down on Trump, even as he dances on the tracks.

Fuck the extremist election deniers. What’s money for if not for keeping them out of office?

“I never thought they’d lock HIM up,” sobbed a distraught member of the Lock Her Up Party.

Not so fun when the rabbit gets the gun, is it?

Glad to see john eastman going through some things.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

He imagines himself as The Big Bad, Who Is Universally Feared… instead of The Big Jagoff, Who Is Universally Mocked.

Not all heroes wear capes.

Books are my comfort food!

Motown is Joe-Town!

Sitting here in limbo waiting for the dice to roll

Second rate reporter says what?

Give the craziest people you know everything they want and hope they don’t ask for more? Great plan.

I’ve spoken to my cat about this, but it doesn’t seem to do any good.

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97Comments

  3. 3.

    Gimlet

    In an interview with the Guardian on the eve of the first Democratic presidential debate, Trump said Sanders’ beliefs were “a short road to failure for this country”.

    Trump responded: “I am a capitalist.” He added that in a long business career, “I have created tremendous numbers of jobs and lots of education for families and healthcare for families.”

    In contrast, Trump said, “Bernie Sanders is a socialist and he’s trying to soften it by saying a Democrat and a socialist – but he’s really a socialist.” The Republican candidate claimed that Sanders has “always said socialist before and now he’s changing it and wants to be a little more mainstream”.

    But Sanders, an ardent admirer of the early 20th century socialist politician Eugene Debs, has described himself as a “democratic socialist” for at least 20 years and had been wary of using the term “socialist” early in his political career.

    “Bernie Sanders feels strongly about trade,” the Republican frontrunner told reporters. “One thing I will say about him is he knows we’re being ripped off on trade.”

    “That is one issue that I would say we would get along,” Trump said of his fellow outsider across the aisle.

  6. 6.

    Mandalay

    So this is how bail worked out for the fleeing shoplifter and the psychofuck shooter at Home Depot:

    Tatiana Duva-Rodriguez, 46, was arraigned Tuesday afternoon before Rochester Hills 52-3 District Magistrate Marie Soma on one count of reckless use, discharge or handling of a firearm.

    A not guilty plea was entered for Duva-Rodriguez and she was released on $5,000 personal bond pending a future court date to be determined.

    The driver of the truck, Anthony Harris, 46, pleaded not guilty to retail fraud charges Saturday and is being held in the Oakland County Jail in lieu of $25,000 bond and an Oct. 19 probable cause hearing.

    Guess who is white and who is black in that story.

  8. 8.

    shell

    CNN says the debate coverage starts at 8:30. Are they starting with Kathy Griffin from the Red Carpet?

  9. 9.

    FlyingToaster

    I think you beat my husband’s threat — he said that if we had to have a “wedding”, he was f*&^&%#$ing booking They Might Be Giants.

    We got married in our living room and informed the various in-laws afterward. One Molvanîa per planet.

  10. 10.

    Betty Cracker

    @efgoldman: I’m pretty sure LSU will open a can of whup-ass on the Gators, if that’s what you’re asking. Of course, I hope not!

  11. 11.

    boatboy_srq

    @Gimlet: At least this is less untrue of Sanders than similar statements the GOTea has made about Obama in the last few years.

  12. 12.

    Right to Rise

    Hillary needs to address the e-mail issue tonight, or it will dog her campaign all the way to the general. If the MSM is to do its job, it must address her emails, her strange behavior after Benghazi, her untrustworthyness, , and her inability to connect with the average American, her atrocious record as Secretary of State, the failed “reset” with Russia (Mitt Romney turned out to be right on that one, eh guys?), the premature withdraw from Iraq, and the emboldenment of ISIS.

    None other than Bob Woodward (!!) says they could be like the The Nixon Tapes.

  14. 14.

    David Koch

    Big sports week:

    Dodgers – Mets tonight

    2 winner take all baseball games tomorrow night

    WNBA Championship tomorrow night. Will the great Tamika Catchings cap off her storied career with one last title.

    Michigan v Michigan St on Saturday.

  17. 17.

    Mandalay

    We have a new contender for the biggest shithead in America….

    A woman who sued her 12-year-old nephew over a birthday hug that left her with a broken wrist has been awarded zero damages by a Connecticut jury.

    The aunt, Jennifer Connell, claimed her nephew acted unreasonably when his exuberant greeting caused her to fall and break her wrist in 2011, the Westport News reported from the courthouse on Monday.

    He had been riding his first two-wheeled bicycle – which was bright red, according to testimony – around his home. When Connell arrived, he dropped it and ran to her. “I remember him shouting, ‘Auntie Jen, I love you!’ and there he was flying at me,” Connell is quoted as saying in court.

    The aunt, who was seeking $127,000 in damages, told the court that she had found it “difficult to hold my hors d’oeuvre plate” at a recent party.

    If there is a hell, she surely deserves a special place.

  20. 20.

    Right to Rise

    @RK:

    Hey, lesbos like it! They should consider moving a team to a place like western Massachusetts and go all-in on the lesbian marketing angle.

  22. 22.

    trollhattan

    @Mandalay: Okay, that’s a winner. And by “winner” I mean someone who won the sociopathy sweepstakes. Holidays with the family…priceless.

  23. 23.

    Right to Rise

    @Gimlet:

    I won’t, but people need to know the truth.

    Hillary means a calculating sociopath as Commander-in-Chief. I don’t want to live in that world, do you?

    Hillary means secrecy. Hillary means corruption. Hillary only cares about Hillary and not the nation, hell she doesn’t even care about the Democrat Party. Just in herself and maybe Bill depending on the day.

  25. 25.

    Right to Rise

    @Yatsuno:

    Phobia? I’m talking marketing to gays. Billion dollar industry. The WBNA would make buckets if they just admitted what their fanbase is and stop trying to be mainstream. Find a niche and go for it!

  29. 29.

    Gimlet

    David Brooks has come to Jesus. Soon to write for BJ.

    http://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/13/opinion/the-republicans-incompetence-caucus.html

    Basically, the party abandoned traditional conservatism for right-wing radicalism.

    Really, have we ever seen bumbling on this scale, people at once so cynical and so naïve, so willfully ignorant in using levers of power to produce some tangible if incremental good? These insurgents can’t even acknowledge democracy’s legitimacy — if you can’t persuade a majority of your colleagues, maybe you should accept their position. You might be wrong!

  30. 30.

    max

    @FlyingToaster: I think you beat my husband’s threat — he said that if we had to have a “wedding”, he was f*&^&%#$ing booking They Might Be Giants.

    What? Is your husband not the kindest, smartest and most decent man you’ve ever met?

    max
    [‘THAT’S a threat??’]

  31. 31.

    Right to Rise

    Anyway gotta go for now folks!

    Be back for a “live-blog” in the comments at 8:30 sharp, with a focus on Hillary!

    I hope the MSM does its job for once.

  36. 36.

    Mnemosyne (iPhone)

    @FlyingToaster:

    I saw They Might Be Giants at the House of Blues in Anaheim a few years ago (for my birthday!) so I can’t imagine they would have been that expensive. I totally would have called his bluff, because everyone would have remembered your concert wedding!

  38. 38.

    FlyingToaster

    @max: Yes, indeed, a true prince among men is my husband.

    He could use a rheostat, but honestly, I’m not complaining.

  41. 41.

    Mandalay

    @trollhattan: If only she had been packing heat she could have wasted him as soon as he said “Auntie Jen, I love you!”.

    Her wrist would have been fine, and she wouldn’t have any problem holding her hors d’oeuvre plate. Guns solve problems.

  43. 43.

    Mnemosyne (iPhone)

    @Right to Rise:

    Hillary means a calculating sociopath as Commander-in-Chief. I don’t want to live in that world, do you?

    Okay, now I suspect spoofiness, because we already lived in that world from 1968 to 1972, and then again from 1980 to 1988, and then again from 2000 to 2008. Why am I supposed to balk at a Democratic sociopath being in charge instead of a Republican one? I say, let’s get some sociopath diversity in the Oval Office!

  45. 45.

    FlyingToaster

    @Mnemosyne (iPhone): They Might Be Giants wouldn’t have been too expensive (John-n-John grew up nearby) but they are generally undanceable. Except for Istanbul, not Constantinople, or whatever it’s called.

  47. 47.

    trollhattan

    Things are looking a little shaky for our mayor. Wouldn’t be disappointed if he decided against term #3 myself. He and the wife can put their full efforts into their hobby of busting teachers unions.

    The head of Sacramento’s Democratic Party called for Mayor Kevin Johnson to “step aside” on Tuesday after a 1996 video of a teenage girl accusing the mayor of sexual abuse surfaced and ESPN delayed the national release of a documentary highlighting the city’s effort to keep the Kings.

    Kerri Asbury, chairwoman of the Democratic Party of Sacramento County, told The Sacramento Bee she thinks Johnson should resign so that “the focus returns to the city’s needs and not more reports of impropriety.”

    Asbury said the party’s executive board has not taken a formal position on Johnson’s future and likely won’t until at least its Nov. 12 meeting. However, after speaking to other members of the party’s leadership, she said, “If I were putting down money on which way the committee would go, I would bet on a call for resignation.”

    “At a minimum, I think he needs to not seek re-election,” Asbury said.

    For his part, Johnson told reporters Monday night that the video of the teenager and ESPN’s decision would play no role in whether he seeks an unprecedented third term next year. He said he would make a decision “pretty soon here.”

    The video in question has been around for a good while, but reappraisal post-Cosby gives is a wholly new skeezy feel. That poor girl.

  50. 50.

    FlyingToaster

    @Right to Rise: As usual, you’re fucking delusional. Hillary needs to stop “addressing” Benghazi and quit coddling the concern trolls, IMNSHO.

    ¿Jeb?’s cash will keep him in the race until California, but I don’t see any path to the nomination with his current strategy.

    Trump v Clinton, 2016. And Trump won’t pay you to troll for him, heh heh heh.

  52. 52.

    DTTM

    I have never been a fan of the Clintons, but Democrats must retain the White House or else, to quote Jim Morrison: “The whole shit house will go up in flames…”

    So, sigh, I hope that HRC does well.

    Sanders would be another Mondale/Dukakis/McGovern…torn to shreds by the 1% controlled media machine.

    HRC at least knows about that and has the money to fight back against the Trump/Rubio ticket.

    O/T….SNL giving Trump guest host privileges shortly. This is what we must defeat, and only HRC can do it.

    Wish we had better choices, but not this cycle.

  53. 53.

    Betty Cracker

    @efgoldman: On the other hand, the backup QB (now starter) has big game experience and was contending for the starting job, so it’s not like a nobody is suddenly thrust into the spotlight. I don’t know what’ll happen — rankings at this point are rubbish (maybe at any point). But I’m hoping to be pleasantly surprised, as I have been all season.

  55. 55.

    p.a.

    Question for the legal eagles in the audience re: Aron Hernandez. There was talk about using his gang tatoos as evidence against him. Apparently gang members use ink to document their lives including, apparently, their crimes. (Not to bright, right?)

    Couldn’t defense claim this is covered by self-incrimination rules?

  56. 56.

    Mnemosyne (iPhone)

    Also, too, if we’re talking weddings, my mom and I each had our own. We had the ceremony out here in California at a lovely UU church and a luncheon for 40 people afterwards, and then my mom had a reception for us a month later in Illinois for 150 friends and relatives. It went really well, actually — we were each able to plan the party we wanted and the other person didn’t care because she had her own party. It probably helped that my mom is an atheist, so she couldn’t have cared less about the ceremony.

  57. 57.

    David Koch

    PPP Poll – Pennsylvania Oct 9-11

    Trump…………..24%
    Carson………….23%
    Cruz………………9%
    Fiorina……………9%
    Christie…………..7%
    ¿Jeb?…………….7%◄
    Rubio……………..6%
    Christie…………..3%

    Head to head Trump blows out ¿Jeb? 60 to 31

  64. 64.

    Germy Shoemangler

    The mushroom Phallus indusiatus has a curious side effect:

    According to a 2001 publication in the International Journal of Medicinal Mushrooms, the smell of the fresh fungus can trigger spontaneous orgasms in human females. In the trial involving 16 women, 6 had orgasms while smelling the fruit body, and the other ten, who received smaller doses, experienced physiological changes such as increased heart rate. All of the 20 men tested considered the smell disgusting. According to the authors, the results suggest that the hormone-like compounds present in the volatile portion of the gleba may have some similarity to human neurotransmitters released in females during sexual activity. The study used the species found in Hawaii, not the edible variety cultivated in China

  65. 65.

    Mike J

    @p.a.:

    Couldn’t defense claim this is covered by self-incrimination rules?

    Are the tats where someone else could see them? You could have someone testify to seeing it. Also, when a defendant is booked for a crime, they usually note scars, tattoos, or other identifying marks as part of the description. Being asked to give an accurate description of yourself generally isn’t considered self incrimination.

  66. 66.

    Elie

    @David Koch:

    Man oh man — that Krazee Karson dude — umh umh umh..

    That said, no one is breaking that 30% barrier anymore. Trump sticks at 23-24% and the next one down the line is a point or two back. It will be significant when someone switches the lead with Trump… its over for big klown then. Interesting that he doesn’t jump Carson… why is he afraid to? He said it was because Carson doesn’t attack him. Hmmm. We’ll test that real soon. Trump doesn’t want it anyway is my guess. This is as good an exit strategy as any. It will be interesting also to see how or if the others jump Carson and how…

  67. 67.

    Gin & Tonic

    @Gimlet: Have you read Balloon-Juice today? The Brooks column was the subject of scores of comments in at least two threads starting this morning.

  68. 68.

    RK

    Hillary means a calculating sociopath as Commander-in-Chief. I don’t want to live in that world, do you?

    What’s funny about this is that it’s satire flipped on its head. I’d say voting for the Iraq War was both calculating and sociopathic.

  70. 70.

    max

    @Mnemosyne (iPhone): IANAL, but now I’m wondering if you need to get a warrant in order to introduce someone’s tattoos as evidence.

    Actually, if the tattoos were covered by clothing, then yes… because they tried to get a warrant to get a picture of that one kid’s schlong (to prove a photograph was a selfie). If, however, someone were to be arrested and photographed being processed into jail then I’d bet that photograph would be admissible as long as the arrest wasn’t bogus to begin.

    max
    [‘Whether they can convincingly prove a tattoo is evidence of a crime is another question.’]

  73. 73.

    Ripley

    Hillary means a calculating sociopath as Commander-in-Chief.

    Hillary’s voting for Jeb? Who knew….

  74. 74.

    Elie

    @trollhattan:

    Beautiful!

    BTW, did y’all see The Martian? I loved it — fully entertained and made to feel a sense of wonder again. Wonder is important and in my opinion, frequently missing in more recent sci-fi. It was missing from the most recent Jurassic World movie, for example.

  75. 75.

    Elizabelle

    The Milwaukee gun store verdict: minor bought a gun and shot two officers. They sued. Store didn’t check the purchaser.

    Straw purchaser.

    STORE IS GUILTY.

  76. 76.

    David Koch

    @Elie:

    to see how or if the others jump Carson

    He’s a BIG supporter of socialized medicine (no really)

    “The entire concept of for profits for the insurance companies makes absolutely no sense. “I deny that you need care and I will make more money”. This is totally ridiculous. The first thing we need to do is get rid of for profit insurance companies. “

    The question will be if the base gives him a free pass. For the longest time the base will give their own a pass on anything — IOKIYAR. But will they do it this time.

  78. 78.

    Elizabelle

    @WaterGirl: Yes! Very glad to see that.

    I feel the worm turning our way, on a lot of issues. Off to get ready for the debate watch party.

  79. 79.

    Elie

    @David Koch:

    Hmmm — didn’t know that he was a big supporter of socialized medicine… how did THAT happen in a brain that doesn’t believe in evolution? Wonders never cease.

    Well, that doesn’t bode well for his candidacy. We may not know who is going to jump him, but someone definitely will,,,

  80. 80.

    Mandalay

    @Elizabelle: I was just reading an interesting (and pertinent?) comment on that in the NYT:

    As a bartender in Nashville I had to attend, and pay for, alcohol awareness courses every five years. During the classes we were informed that by dram shop laws, not only our establishments, but we could be held liable for any damages or loss of life incurred by customers if we continued to serve them after they were visibly intoxicated.

    I have seen bartenders handcuffed and taken away after sting operations conducted by, yes, the ATF who sends underage patrons into establishments on a regular basis to test that we are carding properly.

    Now, I’m not complaining that these laws and operations are unfair. Indeed, they save lives. But if alcohol can be so tightly regulated, why not guns?

    Why not indeed. I think sting operations by the ATF on gun stores is a great idea.

  81. 81.

    Patrick

    @David Koch:

    “The entire concept of for profits for the insurance companies makes absolutely no sense. “I deny that you need care and I will make more money”. This is totally ridiculous.

    I thought their dumb logic was that it would increase freedom if we had for profit insurance companies that had the right to refuse coverage for pre-existing conditions. Anything else per the tea baggers would be tyranny. That was their whole argument against the ACA.

  83. 83.

    Another Holocene Human

    @Mandalay: Well, she can’t sue the parents, because the child caused the injury and obviously a major injury is a tort. She has medical bills and may have suffered ongoing harm. (Although apparently not occupational, given the arguments related by the paper?) IANAL and I don’t understand how these civil things go. I thought the plaintiff has the right to take it in front of a panel of judges which you’d think would be better for her than a jury in this case. Meh. Maybe she hired an attorney on contingency and her attorney really sucked?

  85. 85.

    Another Holocene Human

    @Gimlet: Hardly. Once an authoritarian, always an authoritarian. He despises the far right tea party faction because they refuse to come to heel. Hence the notion that they should knuckled under to the majority. (Yet oddly, he doesn’t advice the GOP in general they ought to do with with Democratic issues, instead the Dems should listen to them.)

  86. 86.

    JPL

    @Mandalay: The repubs painted Fast and Furious as some type of program that Obama was using to take away guns. The operation was to stop trafficking into Mexico. A homeless person was able to buy dozens of guns at one gun shop in Arizona.
    also, the operation was started under Bush.

  87. 87.

    Another Holocene Human

    @p.a.: Tattoos seem like a particularly poor form of evidence given the range of interpretation possible. Consider the fact that a person might choose tattoos with intimidating implications simply to enhance their own social status or for their own ego reasons and the implications of the tattoos might be false. I’m not the prosecution or the jury and most jury members are still going to be drawn from Silent Gen I suppose, but for me personally even introducing that sort of evidence would seem like a tacit implication that the prosecution thought their own case was weak and would open a hole for the defense to introduce reasonable doubt even if it’s an irrelevant misdirection. They have plenty of real circumstantial evidence around this guy and again, if I were prosecutor, I would want the minds of the jury fixated on all those tangible piece of the puzzle, not stuff the defense can endlessly quibble with. Bringing up Hernandez’ own tattoos is like inviting him, through a proxy, to introduce his own ridiculous, self-serving narrative–illustrated narrative.

    Hm, ever notice that public prosecutors win most of their cases, but lose appallingly and embarassingly when they’re up against high dollar defense attorneys with a warchest for experts? Even DOJ struck out in some high profile bankster cases.

  89. 89.

    Mandalay

    @Another Holocene Human:

    Maybe she hired an attorney on contingency and her attorney really sucked?

    Maybe she just didn’t have a case with any merit. The incident actually occurred over four years ago, on the kid’s eighth birthday. How many aunt’s would sue their eight year old nephew?

    An unreported family feud is the only way I can make sense of this case.

  90. 90.

    Steeplejack

    Man, the Cubs are about to knock out the Cardinals. Didn’t see that coming.

    ETA: And they win as I’m writing this!

  91. 91.

    01jack

    @Mandalay:

    How many aunt’s would sue their eight year old nephew?

    It makes some sense if you of it this way: She was probably really, in effect, suing the family’s insurance company.

  97. 97.

    Paul in KY

    Betty, that must have been one Hell of a reception!

    Zlad could play Bonnaroo late night. He would go over well there.

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