Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

The willow is too close to the house.

It’s all just conspiracy shit beamed down from the mothership.

Bark louder, little dog.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

When do we start airlifting the women and children out of Texas?

A last alliance of elves and men. also pet photos.

I’d try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work.

Trump’s legal defense is going to be a dumpster fire inside a clown car on a derailing train.

Roe isn’t about choice, it’s about freedom.

if you can’t see it, then you are useless in the fight to stop it.

Russian mouthpiece, go fuck yourself.

Come on, media. you have one job. start doing it.

Come on, man.

Second rate reporter says what?

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

A sufficient plurality of insane, greedy people can tank any democratic system ever devised, apparently.

Let’s delete this post and never speak of this again.

“What are Republicans afraid of?” Everything.

Consistently wrong since 2002

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

There are consequences to being an arrogant, sullen prick.

Despite his magical powers, I don’t think Trump is thinking this through, to be honest.

Too often we confuse noise with substance. too often we confuse setbacks with defeat.

You are here: Home / Past Elections / Election 2016 / Party Pooper

Reader Interactions

67Comments

  3. 3.

    jl

    Sounds good to me.
    Wonder if the fact checkers, WaPo and NYT will call it a pants on fire lie because, technically, in terms of a business transaction, the prostitute answered Vitter’s call.

    But who cares, it’s the kind of hard hitting ad needed to push voters out of there tribal (aka, bigoted) loyalties.

  6. 6.

    lamh36

    Seen it. But to be honest, funny enough I see more ads linking Edwards to Obama on more “liberal” stations for some reason. I mean a Pro-Vitter ad on LOGO?

    @Gin & Tonic: 4 term Gov Edwin Edwards. No relation to this one though, I believe

  9. 9.

    Kathmandu513

    Holy shit. I can not believe a Democrat is running that ad. A Reuplican would run that an not think twice. That is brutal

  10. 10.

    Gin & Tonic

    @lamh36: Yah, I know, that was semi-snarky (I used to have business in NO and was there fairly frequently back in his day.) The comparison of, um, character is interesting. They’re not related, right?

  11. 11.

    Earl

    A Democrat found some balls. I *love* it.

    Now why the fuck did no one call out the Great Mulligan until Jeb! stomped on his own dick?

    Maybe Bel Edwards could run the DNC.

  12. 12.

    lamh36

    ooh…wait…no that’s new…damn…yep..that’s brutal…GOOD…as I said, I’ve seen so many of them damn Obama-Edwards type ads or them “the david vitter” i know type ads on my tv, it was making me DVR everything just to go past them commercials.

    The question: Is it an actual ad buy or just for internet

  13. 13.

    Trollhattan

    Heh, hilarious. Wonder if they have a reserve “Diaper Dave” ad a glass case with a sign, “In case of Vitter surge, break glass and run it.”

  15. 15.

    Mary G

    Wow. Just wow. “Vitter chose prostitutes over patriots.” Ouch. Good for Edwards.

    In other good news, Fox Business News says four candidates didn’t make the cut for the grown-ups’ table at the next Republican debate: Chris Christie; Mike Huckabee; Lindsey Graham; and George Pataki.

    Bwah ha ha.

  19. 19.

    Calouste

    @Mary G: Pataki and Graham didn’t even make the cut for the kiddie table, and the cut for the kiddie table was to poll above 0% in 1 out of 4 recent polls.

  23. 23.

    HeartlandLiberal

    Also f***** true. I for one am just glad to see a Democrat who is willing to actually go for his opponent’s throat like this with the hard truth. I think Democrats nationwide should pay attention to this. My biggest complaint about the Democratic party is it is just a bunch of wimps who do not understand when your opponents treat you like the enemy, you sometimes have to reply in kind.

  27. 27.

    benw

    @Trollhattan: saw that. The article says that the kids of gay parents can reapply for church membership when they turn 18. Good luck with that, you stupid Mormon assholes!

  29. 29.

    jl

    @beltane:

    Wonkette has the most concise and readable summary.
    Christie and Huckabee to kiddie table, Pataki and Graham told to stay home.

    BTW: what happened to the formatting buttons for comments?
    I have no problems with the new format at all. I do have problems if the site is starting to fall apart already.
    I want a decent interval before BJ website chaos kicks in.
    Well, wonkette.com is easy to find.

    GOP Losers Suck So Hard They’ve All Been Demoted To Kids’ Table Debate
    http://wonkette.com/595712/gop-losers-suck-so-hard-theyve-all-been-demoted-to-kids-table-debate

  39. 39.

    wjs

    I’m sorry but Louisiana loves hookers and veterans are what they step over in order to get to the part of town where the sleazy ones work. This might do really, really well around military bases and Wal-Mart but it’s not going to make a dent with the downtown businessmen who prefer adult-diapers, funnels, and lube.

  42. 42.

    geg6

    @wjs:

    From what I’ve seen, Edwards was doing well in comparison to Vitter to begin with, so this is just insurance.

    But damn, that’s a brutal ad! Love to see a Dem not afraid to hit ’em hard.

  44. 44.

    gratuitous

    Well, that certainly would do some damage to a candidate in some areas. Are we sure that voters in Louisiana would come away from that ad favoring Edwards over Vitter? Military service only seems to be a factor in favor of Republicans (cf. Kerry/Bush 2004), and being a lovable rogue who frequents prostitutes while declaiming family values only seems to enhance a Republican candidate’s standing (because of the contrition and the sinnnnnnnned against you, voters-love-redemption angle).

  46. 46.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @gratuitous: The Edwards campaign certainly thinks so. People run around complaining that Dems don’t fight hard and then, when one does, people worry that it might not do any good. Jeebus fuck!

  47. 47.

    Mnemosyne (iPhone)

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    My main concern is that John Bel Edwards has managed to keep his pants zipped prior to dropping this bomb. If he has, I think it will leave a mark.

    For some reason, a Bertie Wooster quote came to mind: “At the age of 14 I once wrote to Marie Lloyd for her autograph, but apart from that my private life could bear the strictest investigation.”

  51. 51.

    hells littlest angel

    Fucking brutal. And fucking awesome.

    Vitter may need a diaper when he sees that.

  53. 53.

    philpm

    OOOOUUUCCH!!!! That mark will last at least until the next election. Gotta give the campaign props for being willing to go there.

  58. 58.

    wjs

    @Really?: Oh, God yes. Speaking as a downtown businessman, hookers are a fact of life. They are a producer in this economy–they are the vibrant life of any major American city. Veterans are takers.

    I have a sneaky suspicion that Vitter’s numbers are going to go up after this ad airs among suit-wearing professionals, sports team owners, and truckers. That’s what will get him elected governor–people know that this ad is unfair to handjob artists, whores, and your assorted sex industry professionals. Good people, all of them.

  59. 59.

    mclaren

    Dave Vitter sounds like a much better human being than John Bel Edwards.

    Vitter wanted to fuck gorgeous young women, while John Bel Edwards signed up to burn brown babies and shoot women in the head at checkpoints because they can’t speak English. Edwards seems like a sick sick sick individual. Vitter sounds a lot more normal.

  60. 60.

    mclaren

    In cultural anthropology terms, this campaign commercial provides a perfect MRI scan of America’s diseased puritanism. Consider the message of the commercial: killing people is good and admirable, having sex is evil and shameful.
    The deeply pathological sadomasochism of American culture gets clearly revealed by this kind of TV commercial. You would never find this kind of campaign commercial in Germany, where prostitution is legal and regulated by the government. You would never find this kind of commercial in the Netherlands, or in Finland or Denmark.
    Only in a sick twisted culture like America would the equation “murder + suffering = good, pleasure + sexuality = bad” seem anything other than wildly insane.
    The other fascinating aspect of this kind of TV commercial remains its glaring dishonesty. Anyone who served in war zones like Iraq or Afghanistan or Somalia or Sarajevo will tell that prostitution runs rampant in war zones. But not just ordinary prostitution — underage girls. The kind of prostitution you see in war zones like Afghanistan is the really grim kind, the kind of prostitution where ten-year-old girls watch their family get blown away by a Hellfire missile that mistakenly murders everyone in a wedding party, and only the ten-year-old kid is left alive.
    And who, in a dirt-poor third-world country like Afghanistan, is going to take care of a ten-year-old girl whose entire family and all her relatives have mistakenly been murdered by the Americans?
    Nobody.
    A ten-year-old orphan like that is on her own.
    So she becomes a prostitute to survive. She either lets U.S. servicemen fuck her up the ass for American dollars, or she starves.
    I would bet hard cash that John Bel Edwards, like most of the other young servicemen stationed in Afghanistan and Iraq, wound up paying some ten-year-old orphan girl to suck him off. We know from the documented evidence that military contractors routinely hired underage hookers in Iraq and Afghanistan. So it’s likely that the U.S. servicemen did too.
    This updates the old motto considerably: instead of “Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel,” we’ll have to modernize it to “Patriotism is the last refuge of the kiddy-raper.”

  61. 61.

    SFAW

    @mclaren:
    Ha! Excellent parody troll (or is it “troll impression”?)

    I’m hoping that’s what it is. Because if you’re serious, that’s some fucked-up shit running all ’round your brain.

  64. 64.

    mclaren

    @SFAW:

    Because if you’re serious, that’s some fucked-up shit running all ’round your brain.

    Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. Because John Bel Edwards “answered America’s call.”

    To do what, exactly?

    What did America “call” servicemen to do in Afghanistan? Can anyone explain? What the fuck is the U.S. army still doing in Afghanistan? What purpose does our military serve?

    Aside from guarding the opium poppy fields of Afghan warlords, that is. I mean aside from little errands like that. Exactly what the FUCK is America doing in Afghanistan? Why should anyone boast about being one of the guys who guarded the Afghan warlords’ opium poppy fields? Why should any former American solider show any pride for what the U.S. military did in Iraq or Afghanistan?

    Explain it to me. Show me what our mission was. Explain how the U.S. military helped anyone, anywhere, at any time, by any means, in Afghanistan or Iraq.

    Other than the heroin-trafficking Afghan warlords, I mean — by guarding their opium poppy fields.

    If you’re going to talk about “some fucked-up shit running around” in people’s brains, we really ought to start with U.S. troops guarding heroin-trafficking warlords’ Afghan opium poppy fields, shouldn’t we?

  65. 65.

    Singular

    McLaren, I mostly kind of agree with most things you say. Including the last rants. But please, stop drinking for the day.

  67. 67.

    SFAW

    @mclaren:
    Don’t be a fucking moron, will you, please?

    I have not bothered to do extensive research on Edwards, as you apparently have, because you’re telling us all the war crimes or atrocities he committed in Afghanistan (and who knows where else?) The link has some lovely photos of poppies, certainly.

    But until you start providing properly-sourced reports of Edwards committing what you call atrocities or war crimes, you might consider not declaring that, because he was in the 82nd Airborne, he’s a war criminal, because reasons.

    I want shit like this, I can bop over to InfoWars, for some USDA Prime.

    ETA: And, you would certainly be more honest if you just stated “I fucking hate the fucking US Armed Forces, because they’re all fucking psychopaths and war criminals, or wish they were,” and be done with it. Might save you a lot of additional typing.

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