I’m glad to have put the whole Wedding Extravaganza behind me, and far enough in the past that at least we didn’t have to worry about such modrun so-see-all dilemmas as discussed in NYMag‘s “How to Have a Social-Media-Optimized Wedding“:
Part 1: Proper Hashtagging
How does one come up with a hashtag?…
How do you make sure said hashtag gets used?
Should I assign someone to manage social coverage so I don’t have to be tied to my iPhone?…Part 2: Hiring a Live-Tweeter…
Part 3: Moving Things Off Instagram…
Part 4: Going Viral…
Part 5: Should I Use Social Media at the Wedding?
Tweet?… Facebook?… Snapchat?… Tinder?…
Back in 1993, when we succumbed to my father-in-law’s offer to pay for a big catered party, we decided we didn’t need a studio photographer as long as we paid a video professional to tape the ceremony. Of course, said professional didn’t show up on the day, so we ended up relying on one of my ex-boyfriends filming the ceremony, using the battered videocam my matron of honor kept in her mini-van for dog agility classes, plus all the post-ceremony snapshots we could scrounge from guests. But, heck, that’s why you invite friends to your wedding, am I right?
Mnemosyne (tablet)
We spent a full one-third of our budget on really good photographers, and it was SO worth it. Everything else was optional, including the time — we went with a lunchtime wedding because it was a lot cheaper than dinner.
Eric U.
I didn’t really like the photographer at our wedding, too invasive. Interestingly, my wife just found her mother’s wedding album, and was really happy going through it. So maybe it was worth it in our case, who knows?
J R in WV
Funny wedding story:
My brother’s first wedding was at Cromwell Gardens, a private estate covered with flower gardens and landscaping. Ideal for weddings, except 90 miles south of Atlanta where the primary participants lived.
His best friend was to be best man, and best man’s wife was 8.5 months pregnant. Directions were get of at the Cromwell Gardens exit [ but there were three of them, bro knew which one, left details out of directions!!! ] turn right, go left, etc.
My wife and best mans’ wife were driving together, got lost, drove up dirt road into woods to change into fancy duds from road clothes. Imagine beautiful blond young woman, changing clothes in the woods, giantly preggers. Fortunately we were all from West Virginia and had been naked in the woods before. So they didn’t waste any time giggling, just got changed and began the search for crumwell gardens.
Arrived just in time, as the chapel was full booked for the day, and Bro and his bride would have gotten married out in the yard if they had waited any longer.
Fortunately best man and bro and I were together, best man had the rings, I was supernumery, just wore tux and stood there. Ushered family guests to their seats, etc. pretty boring. Only lasted 2 or 3 years. She was nice, but decided she didn’t want to be married yet, went back to grad school.
When MRs J and I got married, we spent like $200 total. $15 for the organist, $20 for the minister, Her mom baked the chocolate cake, MRs J made her dress and my shirt. My mom did the photos. Worked very well, 45 years next May if we make it that long. ;-)
My cousin got married the day after we did – high church Episcopalian, 600 guests, flowers for everyone, sit down dinner with wine for all. Lasted 9 months. She came home and he was in bed with another girl friend… Whut? We were supposed to be like, only each other? Naw, I’m not that way at all. Free Spirit, free love, right? Nope right on out of there. Money and fancy doesn’t make the marriage stick at all. The fun is in indicator…
Ruckus
A friend had their house burn down. The only thing we found in the remains that wasn’t crispy was their wedding album. He’s grown man, ex Marine, and cried about that. Most amazing thing, it was within 5 feet of a vehicle that was mostly melted or twisted metal. All they had left was the clothes on their backs, their two cats and that album.
Ruckus
Also just read a post on FB from a HS friend about a couple that fired their photographer because they photographed a gay wedding. Asked for their deposit back. The reply was to read the contract, the deposit is non-refundable but they weren’t going to keep the money.
They donated it to GLAD. $1500.
Scapegoat
Jeebus… How ’bout this hashtag?
#MoreBullshitConformityAndSocialAnxietyPlease
Our wedding photographer, an artist, was given one rule: no posed photos. He got staggeringly drunk and the photos (shot with infrared(?) film) were trippy — all candid, occasionally in focus, and as deliriously fun as the day itself.
Throwaway cameras at the tables (pre-smartphone!) yielded priceless selfies, including a table full of people hanging spoons on their noses.
Hashtag for the soon-to-be-betrothed: #SaveYourDamnMoneyAndHaveAPotluckAtAPicnicShelter
Scapegoat
@Ruckus: That’s incredible.
Scapegoat
@Ruckus: Love it! Bigots get an expensive taste of their own medicine.
Botsplainer
So I see that Dick Cheney thinks that Trump is an extremist and expressing something that doesn’t reflect who we are as a people.
The Breitbart comments are priceless.
sharl
@Botsplainer: If the Breitbart comments are anything like Twitter, some will have noted that Cheney has some business links to Saudis, for which Trump’s latest xenophobic concept would be inconvenient at best.
I’ll never take arguments based on idealism or noble values at face value when uttered by Cheney. A business calculation though…that I could believe.
Scapegoat
@Botsplainer:
Cheney (from Breitbart):
Nope. Nobody at all.
What a self-consumed asshat.
Gator90
Fins win! (I I know I’m late for the wrong thread, but Fins win!)
Wag
Our photographer was a woman who melted into the crowd at our wedding and filled her camera with the most amazing candid shots. She was amazing.
Emily68
My advice for those thinking about how much wedding is enough…For God’s sake, don’t spend the down payment on a house for a big party.
delk
After my partner had a serious illness in 2011 we decided that we didn’t want to wait until same sex marriage came to Illinois, so we crossed the border to Iowa to get married.
We had been together for 12 years at that point and just opted to make it as low key as possible. We found a bed and breakfast that would handle the whole thing. The owner and her friend would be our witnesses.
When the justice of the peace showed up, she asked us if we wanted her to take some photos for us. Sure, we replied and I gave her my camera.
After the ceremony was finished she gave me back the camera and said, “I guess I should have told you, I’m legally blind!”
Out of the 42 photos she took, we ended up with one slightly blurred picture of us.
#didnotmatter
Starfish
Some people use Buffer to fake the live Tweets.
Mnemosyne (tablet)
@Eric U.:
We specifically hired people who did “photojournalism”-style pictures. We did a bunch of photos in old town Pasadena between the wedding and lunch, and one of the funniest happened because an old lady and her family needed to get past us on their way to brunch. So it’s of the two of us standing around while a random old lady putts past us with her walker.