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Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I’m starting to think Jesus may have made a mistake saving people with no questions asked.

This has so much WTF written all over it that it is hard to comprehend.

Sitting here in limbo waiting for the dice to roll

In after Baud. Damn.

Jack be nimble, jack be quick, hurry up and indict this prick.

Hi god, it’s us. Thanks a heap, you’re having a great week and it’s only Thursday!

There are more Russians standing up to Putin than Republicans.

Wow, you are pre-disappointed. How surprising.

We are builders in a constant struggle with destroyers. keep building.

People are weird.

People identifying as christian while ignoring christ and his teachings is a strange thing indeed.

Dear media: perhaps we ought to let Donald Trump speak for himself!

Jack Smith: “Why did you start campaigning in the middle of my investigation?!”

And now I have baud making fun of me. this day can’t get worse.

Narcissists are always shocked to discover other people have agency.

Something needs to be done about our bogus SCOTUS.

… pundit janitors mopping up after the gop

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Consistently wrong since 2002

This year has been the longest three days of putin’s life.

If you cannot answer whether trump lost the 2020 election, you are unfit for office.

When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.

The republican speaker is a slippery little devil.

It’s a good piece. click on over. but then come back!!

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You are here: Home / TV & Movies / Movies / Sunday PopCult Open Thread

Sunday PopCult Open Thread

by Anne Laurie|  December 13, 20155:48 pm| 144 Comments

This post is in: Movies, Open Threads, Popular Culture

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It is every bit as loud and shiny and the acting every bit as wooden as everyone has led me to believe

— Hayes Brown (@HayesBrown) December 13, 2015

George Lucas: And then the Jedi have a gladiator match against a bunch of Pokemon 20th Century Fox: Please stop setting our money on fire

— Hayes Brown (@HayesBrown) December 13, 2015

Obi-Wan: So…we're cool with using this mysterious clone army that we totally didn't order? Yoda: ¯\_(?)_/¯

— Hayes Brown (@HayesBrown) December 13, 2015

Anakin: LEEEEEROOOOY JENK- [takes force lightning to the face]

— Hayes Brown (@HayesBrown) December 13, 2015

Much more, click here (no, you don’t need a twitter account to read other peoples’ tweets).

***********
Apart from cheap snark, what’s on the agenda as we wrap up the weekend?

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Reader Interactions

144Comments

  1. 1.

    Amir Khalid

    December 13, 2015 at 4:54 pm

    Well, episodes I, II, and III are pretty much a lost cause. Episode III is the least bad of the lot, and even there Padme and Anakin’s dramatic impact suffers because the two characters were so poorly developed in the first two movies. But did this Hayes Brown person only find that out now? And who is he, anyway?

  2. 2.

    Baud

    December 13, 2015 at 5:59 pm

    See Star Wars: The Force Awakens® this year and Vote Baud!® in 2016!

    May the Vote Be with Baud!

    (Everyone else in the world is marketing the movie. Why not Baud?)

  3. 3.

    MomSense

    December 13, 2015 at 6:01 pm

    @Baud:

    Vote for Baud I can.

  4. 4.

    Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism

    December 13, 2015 at 6:02 pm

    @Baud:

    (Everyone else in the world is marketing the movie. Why not Baud?)

    Um, they’re either getting paid or have paid through the nose for the marketing rights?

  5. 5.

    Germy

    December 13, 2015 at 6:03 pm

    I bought some Baud Action Figures for stocking stuffers.

  6. 6.

    Germy

    December 13, 2015 at 6:04 pm

    Who needs star wars when we have Michael Bay’s Benghazi!

  7. 7.

    Baud

    December 13, 2015 at 6:05 pm

    @Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism: How many times have Republicans used rock songs without permission? Nothing ever happens to them.

    Besides, I used the ®. I’m covered.

  8. 8.

    Baud

    December 13, 2015 at 6:07 pm

    @MomSense: You are wise, Master MomSense.

  9. 9.

    Baud

    December 13, 2015 at 6:08 pm

    @Germy: I hope it has robots.

  10. 10.

    Baud

    December 13, 2015 at 6:10 pm

    @Germy: Awesome. I thought those had been recalled as a choking hazard.

  11. 11.

    Gin & Tonic

    December 13, 2015 at 6:11 pm

    @Germy: I was at the movies the other day and interspersed with the trailers was an advert for Oliver Stone’s Snowden, due out in May. I’m sure that will be objective.

    I say “advert” because it was just a series of white-text-on-black graphics. A “trailer” shows scenes from the upcoming movie. I guess Oliver’s above that, and we should quiver with anticipation just on the strength of his (and Snowden’s) name.

  12. 12.

    Gin & Tonic

    December 13, 2015 at 6:12 pm

    @Baud: No, not *that* kind of action figure.

  13. 13.

    Eric S.

    December 13, 2015 at 6:16 pm

    “Exciting” night near me. The story is still developing but there was a gun battle 1.5 blocks from my condo. Those familiar with the north side of Chicago it was 1 block west of Wrigley field. Basically behind the McDonald’s on Clark Street. It was at Racine and Patterson. This story says at many as 50 shots were fired. The local ABC affiliate is saying as many as 82.

    I had no idea it had happened at the time. I went for my morning run and saw the patrol cars blocking off Racine. An hour later when I came back they were still there. That’s when I looked it up.

    I think I should be feeling more fear than I currently am.

  14. 14.

    raven

    December 13, 2015 at 6:16 pm

    The garden club loved the gumbo!

  15. 15.

    Germy

    December 13, 2015 at 6:18 pm

    @Gin & Tonic: It’s a teaser trailer. I guess as time goes on, we’ll probably be shown more scenes in extended trailers. But I predict a very limited release.

  16. 16.

    Roger Moore

    December 13, 2015 at 6:21 pm

    @Amir Khalid:

    even there Padme and Anakin’s dramatic impact suffers because the two characters were so poorly developed in the first two movies.

    Which presumably has something to do with Lucas being far more interested in computerized effects than human actors.

  17. 17.

    Baud

    December 13, 2015 at 6:22 pm

    @raven: FTW!

  18. 18.

    Eric S.

    December 13, 2015 at 6:23 pm

    I’ve got tickets for the Force Awakens on Thursday. I’m not 100% sure how we are seeing it on the 17th when everything says it comes out on the 18th but we do have tickets.

    I’m irrationally excited. I recognize my current state though. I felt like this before Phantom Menace and was disappointed. I hope I don’t feel as bad about the new movie.

  19. 19.

    Baud

    December 13, 2015 at 6:24 pm

    @Eric S.: That sucks.

  20. 20.

    PaulW

    December 13, 2015 at 6:25 pm

    Good news: my newest ebook is now on sale on Amazon Kindle!

    Bad news: I listed the COVER ARTIST in the author info by mistake.

    It takes about 12 hours to update records, and I hope I can change this error ASAP.

    /headdesk

  21. 21.

    Baud

    December 13, 2015 at 6:26 pm

    @PaulW: Congrats!!! No link?

  22. 22.

    Peale

    December 13, 2015 at 6:27 pm

    I’m planning my trip to Japan where I’m going to be raising dark money for Baud’s campaign. I’m planning on starting with the yaoi community, so the comments threads may go a little off for a few days until the donors realize that Baud is not really the fujoshi’s fujoshi and this isn’t the place to post DougJ Adam Silverman slash fiction.

  23. 23.

    p.a.

    December 13, 2015 at 6:30 pm

    @Baud: OMG your action figures are programmed to choke people??!! Duuuuudddeee…

  24. 24.

    Baud

    December 13, 2015 at 6:31 pm

    @Peale:

    Good man. Try not to get killed by the yakuza. I heard they are Sanders supporters.

  25. 25.

    debbie

    December 13, 2015 at 6:32 pm

    @raven:

    How could they not? Everything’s better with duck!

  26. 26.

    grrljock

    December 13, 2015 at 6:32 pm

    I liked Star Wars when I saw it on grainy, pirated Betamax as a 12-year old. Then, as an adult, I watched it in the theater upon its rerelease and was disappointed at its thin plot (really, the Rebels’ fate hung on feckless Luke?) and its overwhelming maleness and paleness. Leia is literally the only female character in that whole movie. Cured me of my Star Wars fandom.

  27. 27.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 6:32 pm

    I liked the Prequel trilogy. Sure, it was a disappointment, but it’s a good story with lots of cool moments, so besides the disappointment, why all the hate?

    Also, I saw The Phantom Menace first show first day and was underwhelmed, so I won’t be repeating that experience.

  28. 28.

    p.a.

    December 13, 2015 at 6:33 pm

    @raven: Have you ever done the roux and browning in a pan then transferred to a slow cooker? I haven’t, just wondering if I should try.

  29. 29.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 6:35 pm

    @grrljock: Do any of the Star Wars movies pass the Bechdel Test?

  30. 30.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 6:36 pm

    you don’t need a twitter account to read other peoples’ tweets

    But why, oh why would anyone care to?

  31. 31.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 6:39 pm

    @grrljock

    Leia is literally the only female character in that whole movie.

    Aunt Paroo.

    Also no reason to assume some of the non-humans (Jawas, for example) aren’t female.

  32. 32.

    Anoniminous

    December 13, 2015 at 6:43 pm

    @Peale:

    The next wave: Kermit/Yoda.

    Green on Green. You know you’d buy it.

  33. 33.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 6:43 pm

    @NotMax: Aunt Beru.

    And no reason to assume all of the aliens aren’t male.

    In fact, Lucas made it clear which aliens were female – hint, they had cleavage.

  34. 34.

    raven

    December 13, 2015 at 6:43 pm

    @p.a.: I keep reading about that technique. I don’t have a slow cooker but I have one of those anti-scortch thingies you put on the burner for slow cooking. I simmered the duck yesterday, cleaned the meat off, put the bones back in at let her rip. Then I put the stock in the fridge overnight, harvested the duck fat and used it for the roux. Put it all back together at noon and simmered again until 3.

  35. 35.

    p.a.

    December 13, 2015 at 6:45 pm

    @NotMax: The cartoon was more gender balanced.

  36. 36.

    Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism

    December 13, 2015 at 6:45 pm

    @NotMax:

    Aunt Paroo.

    Beru.

    And don’t forget Mon Mothma.

  37. 37.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 6:48 pm

    I got so absorbed in watching A Matter of Life and Death last night that I totally forgot to give the cats their wet food treat last night until I was getting ready for bed. I iz a bad cat mommy. Being a wartime romance, it doesn’t meet the full Bechdel test either, but you won’t care.

    For some reason I noticed this time that while soldiers from the Axis powers (Germany, Italy and Japan) were excluded from Heaven, Powell was careful to show a multicultural British heaven, with the first British airmen we see in Heaven being Indian (I’m guessing Sikh from the turbans, but I’m not sure what the WWII uniform of the colonial forces was). And when the second, deliberately “all-American” heavenly jury is convened, it includes a Chinese-American and an African-American.

    (If you get TCM through your cable subscription, you can stream it either online or via the Watch TCM app for the next few weeks.)

  38. 38.

    raven

    December 13, 2015 at 6:49 pm

    @Mnemosyne (tablet): That is Stairway to Heaven, no?

    Duh, click confirms.

  39. 39.

    Luther Siler

    December 13, 2015 at 6:50 pm

    There’s a video somewhere that compiles all of the dialogue in the entire trilogy from women who aren’t Leia. It’s about a minute and a half long. There is literally ONE line in Empire from a woman who isn’t Leia.

  40. 40.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 6:52 pm

    @redshirt

    hint, they had cleavage.

    Like Jabba?

  41. 41.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 6:54 pm

    @grrljock:

    Leia was an action princess who aided her own escape, withstood torture, and shot back against the bad guys, which was not at all the norm for that time or in that genre. Sometimes you gotta take your progress where you can.

  42. 42.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 6:55 pm

    @Mnemosyne

    Very brief appearance, but for you, you know who.

  43. 43.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 6:58 pm

    @NotMax: As shown in the prequels, Jabba was clearly a male. With huge man-boobs.

  44. 44.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 6:58 pm

    @raven:

    Stairway to Heaven was the US title — they were afraid Americans wouldn’t go see a wartime movie with “death” in the title.

    Also, I found a movie for you and the other WWII buffs in the AAA magazine, of all places. Apparently back in 1934, James Cagney’s Here Comes the Navy was filmed onboard the USS Arizona less than 10 years before it was sunk at Pearl Harbor, and the film gives a pretty good view of what the ship looked like in its prime.

  45. 45.

    dexwood

    December 13, 2015 at 6:59 pm

    Shoveled 7 inches of snow from my driveway and sidewalk this morning. Went two houses east to repeat the process for my 88 year old in-laws. Just finished reading The Martian while sipping calvados. Will see the movie during the holidays.

  46. 46.

    Anoniminous

    December 13, 2015 at 7:00 pm

    Since we’re doing Pop Culture …

    PostModern Jukebox is awesome.

  47. 47.

    Germy

    December 13, 2015 at 7:01 pm

    60 Minutes is on. They’re doing a segment on the new Star Wars film

  48. 48.

    raven

    December 13, 2015 at 7:01 pm

    @Mnemosyne (tablet): “Stand By for Action (British title: Cargo of Innocents) is a 1942 American war film directed by Robert Z. Leonard, starring Robert Taylor, Brian Donlevy, and Charles Laughton, and featuring Walter Brennan.” was filmed on my dad’s ship before she was converted from a Four Stack DD to and APd.

  49. 49.

    Relax

    December 13, 2015 at 7:01 pm

    Two days until Murphy drops the HAMMER on Trump!

    Did everyone see the latest Iowa poll? Trump is sinking. and fast! Cruz will probably win Iowa now, closing off the insurgent “lane” for Trump. What is Trump going to say when he’s just another “loser” and can no longer crow about being in first?

    When that happens he will sink like a stone in the week between IA and NH–making it anybody’s game in the Granite State! The candidate with the best organization and biggest bank account will stand to benefit–and that means Jeb.

    Cruz’s surge is just what the doctor ordered to take down Trump and open the door for Jeb.

  50. 50.

    Baud

    December 13, 2015 at 7:03 pm

    @Relax: Yay!!

  51. 51.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 7:03 pm

    @NotMax:

    The magic of YouTube provided the whole segment with Wayne Brady, Chris Jackson, and Jackson’s right-hand man.

    It’s a charity show and apparently “Hamilton” came in second in fundraising to “Kinky Boots,” which is pretty good for the new kid on the block.

  52. 52.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 7:04 pm

    @redshirt

    Never bothered with the prequels. Tried the first of them (also the last time I set foot inside a movie theater) and fell asleep about 1/3 of the way through, woke up for about the last 15 minutes. What I did see of it was positively awful, enough to to sour any inclination to see the others.

  53. 53.

    Relax

    December 13, 2015 at 7:06 pm

    Must read from Jen Rubin on Trump’s evangelical problem.

    There are lots of reasons for evangelicals to dislike Trump — his multiple divorces, his casinos, his crude language and his attack on religious liberty, to name just a few. (“For instance, some leaders cited his reported comments about his daughter’s figure, including: ‘I’ve said if Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her.’ “) But it was a small incident that got evangelicals, according to multiple sources, snickering about Trump: His refusal/inability to come up with a favorite Bible verse. (He later came up with one, after “citing a passage about not bending to envy that didn’t seem to exist.”) Saying initially that he would not reveal it because it was “personal” struck many faith leaders as a transparent excuse. (Think about how dishonest one must be to fake religious devotion and the contempt for people of faith it suggests.)

    Evangelicals received further disturbing news when Trump declared that he did not know whether he’d move the U.S. Embassy to Jerusalem, and then when he canceled his trip to Israel. (By contrast, Mike Huckabee has been going to Israel since he was 17.) As the most pro-Israel group within the GOP, evangelicals are going to be savvy observers of the candidates’ pro-Israel bona fides.

    Meanwhile, Ted Cruz surges and Jeb is poised in NH as an Iowa-sized dumpster fire begins to burn at Trump HQ.

    Trump has backed himself into a real corner–he MUST win Iowa or come off as just another “loser”.

  54. 54.

    raven

    December 13, 2015 at 7:08 pm

    @NotMax: Did you know George Takei was in the Green Berets?

  55. 55.

    Relax

    December 13, 2015 at 7:08 pm

    Meanwhile, Trump continues to have problems connecting with evangelicals (See Jen Rubin’s latest take in the WaPo). National Review is increasingly denouncing Trump as not even conservative (by people such as Jonah Goldberg and Charles CW Cooke). Forty percent of Americans say they are “scared” by a Trump Presidency, which shows how unelectable he is. It would be a wipeout–we would lose the Senate and quite possibly even the House, erasing the gains of the Tea Party Movement.

    The good news is that GOP voters are beginning to wake up.

    A dumpster fire is brewing at Trump HQ….

  56. 56.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 7:09 pm

    @NotMax: You haven’t been to a movie theater since 1999?

    If so, I’m impressed.

  57. 57.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 7:10 pm

    @raven

    Yup.

  58. 58.

    grrljock

    December 13, 2015 at 7:10 pm

    @redshirt: Yep. And Aunt Beru had how many seconds of screen time before she was killed off?

  59. 59.

    JPL

    December 13, 2015 at 7:10 pm

    @Germy: hmmm. I still have football on my tv.

  60. 60.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 7:11 pm

    @redshirt

    That was the last time, yes.

  61. 61.

    Germy

    December 13, 2015 at 7:12 pm

    @JPL: right now Obama’s drug czar Botticelli is on. the Star Wars segment is coming up next.

  62. 62.

    Gimlet

    December 13, 2015 at 7:13 pm

    @Relax:

    Relative of yours?

    Baghdad Bob’s pronouncements included claims that American soldiers were committing suicide “by the hundreds” outside the city, and denial that there were any American tanks in Baghdad, when in fact they were only several hundred meters away from the press conference where he was speaking and the combat sounds of the nearing American troops could already be heard in the background of the broadcast.

    On another occasion he spoke of the disastrous outcomes of previous foreign attempts to invade Iraq, citing a unspecified western history book and inviting the journalists present to come to his home to read it. His last public appearance as Information Minister was on April 8, 2003, when he said that the Americans “are going to surrender or be burned in their tanks.

  63. 63.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 7:13 pm

    @grrljock: Like 3, and she certainly didn’t speak to another woman.

  64. 64.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 7:14 pm

    @NotMax: Wow. You’ve missed some spectacles. Mad Max:Fury Road in IMAX3D blew my mind.

  65. 65.

    Baud

    December 13, 2015 at 7:15 pm

    @Gimlet: Wait, all that wasn’t true?

  66. 66.

    Baud

    December 13, 2015 at 7:16 pm

    @redshirt: I don’t go to the movies anymore either.

  67. 67.

    scav

    December 13, 2015 at 7:18 pm

    @Eric S.: Oh, yes, running about in immediate and total fear is entirely the thing to be done anymore. I may indulge in a little myself, despite not having to walk by that parking lot regularly for more than a decade. Is there still that odd garden shrine with freebies on the fence a bit further west? I must have that holy water somewhere . . . .

  68. 68.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 7:19 pm

    @Baud: I rarely go too, but for certain movies in certain venues, it truly is the best way to experience a movie.

  69. 69.

    raven

    December 13, 2015 at 7:22 pm

    @Baud: Nobody goes there anymore, it’s too crowded.

  70. 70.

    JPL

    December 13, 2015 at 7:22 pm

    @Germy: Technically the game is over. There is a little over a minute left but no way for Denver to win. I wish they’d switch…

  71. 71.

    Eric S.

    December 13, 2015 at 7:25 pm

    @scav: Yeah, that house on Addison is still there, shrine and all.

  72. 72.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 7:26 pm

    @scav:

    Some poor bastard got murdered across the street from my old apartment one night. It was a little freaky because I was home at the time and heard the gunshots, but I didn’t see anything.

    The poor guy had been trying to get away from gang life and taken a job at the grocery store across the street from me, and the assholes hunted him down and murdered him one night after work. It didn’t make me feel any less safe in my neighborhood, though, or make me want to get a gun. It was just, “Ugh, how tragic.”

  73. 73.

    Mike in NC

    December 13, 2015 at 7:29 pm

    GOP voters are avoiding the low energy, low testosterone, low IQ member of America’s worst family. He will carry no state primary.

  74. 74.

    lamh36

    December 13, 2015 at 7:32 pm

    A grandfather’s dream come true: proud Aboriginal elder dances with granddaughter at graduation

    Follow the link to see the video of the dance! Beautiful!

    Can’t wait to start planning my trip to Australia!

  75. 75.

    dexwood

    December 13, 2015 at 7:34 pm

    @efgoldman:

    My brother, 8 miles south of the PA border, sent me a a picture of him in shorts and a t-shirt putting up Christmas lights today. ABQ often turns really cold for a spell in December, but that much snow is, generally, an after New Year event.

  76. 76.

    Heliopause

    December 13, 2015 at 7:35 pm

    Purportedly, Brian Epstein drew the line at feminine hygiene products when marketing the Beatles’ likenesses at the height of their popularity. Has Star Wars crossed that line yet? I’m pretty sure I’ve seen every-effing-thing else to this point, but since I don’t spend a lot of time on the feminine hygiene aisle I might have missed it.

    Say, here’s an idea: A Charlie Brown Star Wars. Charlie Brown is driven into a deep depression by the relentless marketing anschluss of Star Wars, until Linus, in his simple and inimitable way, recites a few lines of Obi Wan dialogue from Episode Four, restoring Charlie Brown’s faith in humanity. Alas, he is crushed to death on his walk home by a Wal-Mart truck laden with Star Wars merchandise.

  77. 77.

    Peale

    December 13, 2015 at 7:36 pm

    @Luther Siler: in Jedi, do they count Ewok dialog towards the female tally?

  78. 78.

    gogol's wife

    December 13, 2015 at 7:36 pm

    @Mnemosyne (tablet):

    I answered you on a dead thread. I think that David Niven’s acting in the initial scene is the greatest thing since sliced bread. And charming, charming Roger Livesey showing the camera-obscura to the dogs. I could watch that film every day.

  79. 79.

    gogol's wife

    December 13, 2015 at 7:37 pm

    @Baud:

    LOL

  80. 80.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 7:38 pm

    @redshirt

    So you’ve said. Not my cup o’ celluloid.

    Actually, not going is more a health decision. When the old theaters were closed or demolished, new multiplexes were built. Am acutely sensitive to something in every one of those places, so much so that the next day I am so very, very sick that can barely sit upright. Liked the original Star Wars so much that braved the risk by going to see the first prequel.

    Other people here I’ve encountered here suffer the same malady. Most likely culprit is what is used for insect/vermin control, according to a friend who used to labor for Terminix, one who is licensed to use all kinds of chemicals, up to and including nerve gas for pest control. There’s a sharp, pervasive and most unpleasant metallic stench inside the theaters which those who have no reaction apparently cannot smell at all (and insist to those of us who do detect it that it’s totally imaginary).

  81. 81.

    CaseyL

    December 13, 2015 at 7:39 pm

    AL, thanks for sharing the Hayes Brown tweets; they’re hilarious. I may have to follow him.

    I’m planning on seeing the SW:TFA over the Christmas long weekend. Time enough to catch the first round of reviews, but I’m going with a friend who’s a hard-core SW fan and ghastly reviews may not deter her. Gotta say, after what JJ did to Star Trek in Into Darkness, giving him more of my money stings. So this better be good.

  82. 82.

    gogol's wife

    December 13, 2015 at 7:42 pm

    Charade’s on TCM right now (for the 1000th time this month, but I don’t care). I love Audrey’s mustard-colored coat as she flees Cary on the métro.

  83. 83.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 7:50 pm

    @NotMax: Wow. If I didn’t know already you are wicked smart I would assume you where a modern hypochondriac.

    Some movies are fun in the theater.

  84. 84.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 7:51 pm

    @gogol’s wife:

    I almost forget how much I love that movie between viewings, but then I watch it again. I assume you’ve seen I Know Where I’m Going multiple times if you like Livesey?

  85. 85.

    gogol's wife

    December 13, 2015 at 7:51 pm

    Now there’s going to be a Deanna Durbin murder mystery. It could be really good or really terrible.

    Bye-bye, Walter Matthau.

  86. 86.

    gogol's wife

    December 13, 2015 at 7:52 pm

    @Mnemosyne (tablet):

    Yes, that’s his dreamiest. Well, maybe Colonel Blimp is even better.

  87. 87.

    PaulW

    December 13, 2015 at 7:53 pm

    @Baud:

    I just want people to know I am NOT Istebrak. That’s the artist for the book cover.

    …

    Oh, hey, the link’s fixed. They have my name on the record now at the Kindle store. Title is BODY ARMOR BLUES.
    http://www.amazon.com/Body-Armor-Blues-Paul-Wartenberg-ebook/dp/B019APECC2/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1450054103&sr=8-4&keywords=body+armor+blues

    For those of you with Nooks or EPUB reader formats, Smashwords has the book available although it may be still under review and the sample might be all you can get. I’m checking Barnes & Noble to see when the Smashwords version is available… hmm, nope not yet.

    To be fair to Istebrak, here’s a link to her gallery page. http://www.istebrak.com/

  88. 88.

    Cacti

    December 13, 2015 at 7:55 pm

    Based on the trailers plus the leaked synopsis previously published online, sounds like Abrams/Mickey Mouse have made a rehash of A New Hope, with slightly different settings and characters.

    Yawn.

    And Kylo Ren looks like the lamest villain in the history of the franchise. Not even a Sith.

    “I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

  89. 89.

    PaulW

    December 13, 2015 at 7:56 pm

    @CaseyL:

    I think part of the problem with Into Darkness was that they were forced – either by their fears or by someone in the studio – to shoehorn Khan into a plot that might not have been best served having him. As a result they had to come up with a storyline that made little sense trying to line up the rebooted universe to follow a familiar path rather than reach for a new unique one.

  90. 90.

    rikyrah

    December 13, 2015 at 7:56 pm

    @PaulW:

    link, please.

  91. 91.

    ThresherK

    December 13, 2015 at 7:57 pm

    @redshirt: Crowds make certain things which work, work better. Comedy and tension, particularly.

    And the efforts of good editing, photography direction, etc, are sometimes noted best on the big screen.

    (Disclaimer: My TV is still a CRT.)

  92. 92.

    p.a.

    December 13, 2015 at 7:58 pm

    @redshirt:

    Some movies are fun in the theater.

    Especially comedies. Crowd effects.

  93. 93.

    Debbie

    December 13, 2015 at 8:01 pm

    @Relax:

    Forty percent of Americans say they are “scared” by a Trump Presidency

    And 100% of them wouldn’t vote for any Republican, ammirite?

  94. 94.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 8:02 pm

    @PaulW:

    Yep — the “Khan” character would have worked better as someone else because he didn’t have much to do. Plus, Benedict Cumberbatch as a superhumanly strong dictator? Seriously?

    I am looking forward to Cumberbatch as Dr. Strange, though. That seems like perfect casting.

  95. 95.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 8:04 pm

    @p.a.:

    Horror movies, too. I kind of like it when people shout advice at the screen during a horror movie.

  96. 96.

    Adam L Silverman

    December 13, 2015 at 8:14 pm

    @Peale: that was uncalled for! And just for that, I’ve put the word out in the aikido community. Try not to grab anyone’s wrists while you’re over there…

  97. 97.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 8:14 pm

    @redshirt

    Clocked above average movie theater time. Worked as an usher in one in the next town for several years when in high school (in full tux, and also floor-length cape when working the line outside). One had to obtain a license from the county government to be able to work matinees. Regardless of sex, that license (which had to be pinned to the chest during matinees) in imposingly large block letters identified one as an Official Matron.

    Have mentioned this before, but certainly an odd theater too. No popcorn, free coffee (served in china cups and saucers), tiny candy cart rolled out from a closet only for the time between shows and then hidden away again. The place never, but never, used the studio posters – instead had an in-house artist on salary who made unique posters for each film.

  98. 98.

    Adam L Silverman

    December 13, 2015 at 8:15 pm

    @grrljock: watch the original Kirasawa movie that Lucas ripped off to make the movie: The Hidden Fortress. It’s much better. Even with subtitles.

  99. 99.

    p.a.

    December 13, 2015 at 8:18 pm

    @Mnemosyne (tablet): I enjoy most of that but I’ll admit I covered my eyes several times during the Goldblum/Davis version of The Fly. I’ll never watch that again, home or theater.

  100. 100.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 8:22 pm

    @p.a.

    Yeah, contained too many scenes designed to induce disgust rather than horror.

  101. 101.

    Joel

    December 13, 2015 at 8:23 pm

    As bad as Star Wars I to III were, Indiana Jones IV is that much worse.

  102. 102.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 8:26 pm

    @NotMax: I worked at a mainstream theater for 4 years – last two years of high school and first two years of college. I saw so many 80’s movies, so many times,

    And all the “butter” flavored topping popcorn I could want.

    My first experience with “chemicals” – I memorized the ingredients for the butter flavor topping, which did not have any butter at all. I’d let folks know.

  103. 103.

    Peale

    December 13, 2015 at 8:28 pm

    @Adam L Silverman: yep. I’ll just kind of taunt your aikido minions, bu never attack, neutralizing them all with one sneer.

  104. 104.

    PurpleGirl

    December 13, 2015 at 8:29 pm

    @NotMax: There is one movie theater in Manhattan that I no longer go to. Years ago I began smelling mold and when I smelled it for a second movie, that was it. It didn’t make me sick but I really don’t like the smell. There is/was a store on Steinway Street that had the same mold smell and shopping there isn’t fun. So I stopped going in the store like more than 10 years or more ago.

  105. 105.

    Chyron HR

    December 13, 2015 at 8:29 pm

    @Cacti:

    And Kylo Ren looks like the lamest villain in the history of the franchise. Not even a Sith.

    No, he basically is, but the Empire just calls him a “Dark Jedi” so they don’t have to pay FICA or give him health insurance.

  106. 106.

    ? Martin

    December 13, 2015 at 8:30 pm

    I’m negotiating with the children on which order to watch the series through. Daughter was pretty young when she saw them and realized that everything she knows about Star Wars is from Lego Star Wars. I’m proposing machete order (4,5,2,3,6) but we may do regular flashback (4, 5, 1, 2, 3, 6). I’m holding out Holiday Special as a negotiating threat. It’ll go between 4, 5 if kids don’t get their shit together (it is canon, after all).

    Ep 2-3 would have been much better had Hayden Christensen had no speaking lines.

  107. 107.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 8:31 pm

    @Joel

    Also too, Highlander II and The Howling 2. And anything including the words Children of the Corn (IIRC there have been 9 made now, including the original).

  108. 108.

    CaseyL

    December 13, 2015 at 8:32 pm

    @PaulW: I’d love to know what really happened with that. The reboot was brilliant (IMO). There was no reason to retread something from the original ST universe and instantly waste the wonderful possibilities of a whole new one (not to mention the whitewashing issue of making “Khan” an eerily pale, eerily blue-eyed Brit).

    @Mnemosyne (tablet): I have to defend Cumberbatch. I did like him as a villain; he does vicious very well. Just… not Khan, FFS.

  109. 109.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 8:32 pm

    @p.a.:

    David Cronenberg does love his body horror. You can probably skip Dead Ringers, too — the friend I saw that with had to walk out and wait for me in the lobby.

  110. 110.

    p.a.

    December 13, 2015 at 8:34 pm

    @redshirt: college classmate worked at a theater. For all our Class C parties (1 night legal liquor sales (when 18 was legal)) he’d get us garbage bags full of day old movie popcorn.

    I’m getting verklempt!

  111. 111.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 8:36 pm

    @p.a.: I did the same. Leftover popcorn is movie theater employee currency.

  112. 112.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 8:36 pm

    @? Martin:

    I’ve seen Christensen be not terrible in other movies (like “Breaking Glass”), so once afar I blame George Lucas.

    ETA: I thought about fixing the autocorrect, but decided I like it after all.

  113. 113.

    dmsilev

    December 13, 2015 at 8:37 pm

    @? Martin:

    I’m holding out Holiday Special as a negotiating threat.

    I’m pretty sure that would count as child abuse.

  114. 114.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 8:42 pm

    @CaseyL:

    He’s got a great dead-eyed stare … but that doesn’t make him a Khan.

  115. 115.

    Debbie

    December 13, 2015 at 8:42 pm

    @Mnemosyne (tablet):

    That tray of implements made me very queasy.

  116. 116.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 8:43 pm

    @redshirt

    Neglected to mention the reason behind the free coffee was that the theater was owned by a coffee company, Otherwise unused rooms in the basement were piled floor to ceiling with the stuff, usually large industrial size bags approaching the end of their shelf life, returned from hotels and such.

    Assistant manager of the theater would sometimes fill his pipe with coffee too far gone to serve instead of tobacco and smoke it.

  117. 117.

    p.a.

    December 13, 2015 at 8:45 pm

    @Chyron HR: Contract worker, not employee. “Your evil services are no longer required as of… noon today.”

  118. 118.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 8:48 pm

    Okay, what idiot at the Sundance Channel decided to show the *colorized* version of “Miracle on 34th Street”?

  119. 119.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 8:51 pm

    Hey lame ass Corner Stone – did you see how your entire team is NE Patriot cast offs?

  120. 120.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 8:53 pm

    @Mnemosyne

    Never done to my knowledge, but have always thought certain silent films would hold up well were they colorized.

    (And yes, aware that many were tinted or even included hand-dyed color segments.)

  121. 121.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 9:04 pm

    @NotMax:

    Technicolor was invented in the silent days, but the two-strip process had a lot of technical problems, so color wasn’t widely used until the three-strip process was created. Walt Disney had an exclusive license to use Technicolor for animated films for IIRC 5 years, so that’s why there are Disney shorts in color before you see them from other studios.

    Probably the most famous surviving Technicolor sequence from the silent days is Lon Chaney dressed as the Red Death in “The Phantom of the Opera.” I’ve seen it, and it’s still pretty amazing, though two-strip color breaks down into blues pretty quickly (as with “Mystery of the Wax Museum”).

  122. 122.

    Mnemosyne (tablet)

    December 13, 2015 at 9:11 pm

    For the animation fans, ABC is showing a special about the making of “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs” tonight.

  123. 123.

    Trabb's Boy

    December 13, 2015 at 9:13 pm

    NYT opinion piece by PolitiFact writer:

    While the piece never directly says it, the Republican/Democratic difference is pretty damning. Granted, Politifact ain’t rocket science, though.

  124. 124.

    raven

    December 13, 2015 at 9:25 pm

    @redshirt: I was wondering if he was going to be here babbling about the fuckin Texans.

  125. 125.

    Mike J

    December 13, 2015 at 9:26 pm

    While I appreciate the Seahawks, I think Field Gulls may be ever so slightly overstating things:

    The Seahawks have now beaten consecutive opponents on the road with early kickoffs by a combined score of 73-13. They are blossoming from young reptiles into full grown dragons and are starting to test the limits of their destructive power. With leathery wings, blood-soaked talons, and breath that burns with the fire of a thousand suns, these Seahawks are the armor-scaled bringers of doom foretold about in the days of old.

    I need a 12 flag to flay off the backstay when sailing past the VMAC. I think I may be scared to not have one.

  126. 126.

    Mike J

    December 13, 2015 at 9:27 pm

    @Mike J: Err, fly off the backstay. Stupid editor still doesn’t work.

  127. 127.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 9:28 pm

    @raven: He will be if they’re winning, he won’t be if they’re losing. That’s how lame ass Corner Stone rolls.

  128. 128.

    Central Planning

    December 13, 2015 at 9:30 pm

    That Leroy Jenkins tweet made me LOL. I’ll have to follow him on the Twitter

  129. 129.

    raven

    December 13, 2015 at 9:34 pm

    @redshirt: Must be the lords will or some such.

  130. 130.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 9:37 pm

    @raven: Amen, praise the Lord.

  131. 131.

    NotMax

    December 13, 2015 at 9:40 pm

    @Mnemosyne

    Very rare 1902 full color film.

  132. 132.

    Ruckus

    December 13, 2015 at 9:46 pm

    @NotMax:
    I’d say very rare doesn’t even come close. Pretty amazing stuff.

  133. 133.

    Schlemazel

    December 13, 2015 at 9:59 pm

    @redshirt:
    I worked as a projectionist in a small town in the early 70s and they used a butter-based product. I don’t remember what other stuff was in it but it did actually contain butter.

    Saw “Dirty Harry” about a dozen times. In the final chase he fires 7 shots before confronting the bad guy with the iconic question. It was the start of my picking out errors in movies. I also learned I could cut 15 minutes out of “The French Connection” and nobody would notice.

  134. 134.

    Tissue Thin Pseudonym

    December 13, 2015 at 10:08 pm

    @PaulW: Bought it.

  135. 135.

    redshirt

    December 13, 2015 at 11:40 pm

    @Schlemazel: 80’s chemistry perfected the butter flavor topping.

  136. 136.

    Doug R

    December 13, 2015 at 11:45 pm

    @CaseyL: Yeah Benedict would have worked much better as the crew member who gets god powers in a remake of the original pilot”Where No Man Has Gone Before”

  137. 137.

    Duane

    December 14, 2015 at 1:20 am

    @NotMax:

    I say this with love, but I have to wonder.
    Did the theater you worked at show talkies?

  138. 138.

    mclaren

    December 14, 2015 at 2:06 am

    @Eric S.:
    “The story says 50 shots were fired.” So…a black kid jaywalked. Sounds scary.

  139. 139.

    Mike G

    December 14, 2015 at 3:41 am

    @Heliopause:

    relentless marketing anschluss of Star Wars

    That’s too good not to steal

  140. 140.

    boatboy_srq

    December 14, 2015 at 11:20 am

    @MomSense: At the polling place see you we will.

  141. 141.

    JustRuss

    December 14, 2015 at 12:12 pm

    @NotMax: Ah yes, Highlander 2: There should be only one!

  142. 142.

    Grumpy Code Monkey

    December 14, 2015 at 1:04 pm

    @Eric S.:

    I felt like this before Phantom Menace and was disappointed.

    I should have remembered the Ewoks.

    Nobody ever claimed that Star Wars and Empire were anything but cheesy, campy fun, but they weren’t insultingly juvenile. WIth Jedi, though, the cracks in the foundation were starting to show (both with the story and the direction), and they manifested most clearly as the goddamned Ewoks (you have the technology to blow up a planet, and you are thwarted by a gaggle of rock-throwing teddy bears).

    We dismissed the Ewoks as a glitch, an aberration; they were simply a misstep along the way.

    Except that they weren’t; they were a sign of things to come.

    I walked out of TPM pissed off. It felt like a very expensive practical joke. It was like everything that was wrong with Jedi made a hundred times worse. It was just … bantha poodoo in so many ways. Jar Jar. Young Anakin (that poor kid, Lucas killed any chance of an acting career for him). Young Anakin building C-3PO (WTF). The Trade Federation. The pod race (which stopped the story dead for a good 10 minutes or so). The fucking midichlorians. The stupid battle droids.

    The other two were minor improvements, but only because you can only hit the floor once. Continuity boxes were ticked off in the clumsiest manner possible. No chemistry, none, between Anakin and Padme. Ewan playing Alec playing Obi-Wan. The only redeeming feature of any of the prequels was Palpatine. You’re kind of rooting for him to win when the Jedi turn out to be so fucking useless.

    The only good thing to come out of the prequels was this.

    Lucas lost his mind sometime in the ’80s, but nobody was willing to admit it.

    I do not have high expectations for the new movie, and do not intend to see it opening day. I can wait a few weeks.

    I have to admit, part of my reticence to see it opening day is due to how less flattering elements of the geek culture have metastasized over the last decade or so. I saw Wrath of Khan first showing of opening day back in nineteen-eighty mumble. Showed up at the theater a couple of hours early, managed to be near the head of the line. The crowd was excited, boisterous, fun, noisy, etc., but there were nary a pair of pointy ears or some ill-fitting velour shirt to be seen.

    Now, you have morbidly obese middle-aged men and women playing dress-up (often with the most inappropriate costumes), which I can understand in the context of a con (where there are contests and awards for that sort of thing), but to go see a movie?

    There’s a difference between not growing up and remaining a child.

  143. 143.

    FortGeek

    December 14, 2015 at 2:32 pm

    @Baud:

    Vote Baud!® in 2016!

    I have a question, sir. Do you promise ACTUAL 56k throughput, or is this just another 48.8k thing. Have to ask, been hurt before (AT&T, you still suck!).

  144. 144.

    Cermet

    December 14, 2015 at 3:15 pm

    @redshirt: By extracting the “Butter” smell from real butter leading to many workers have lungs removed!!!! That stuff (from real butter!) is deadly … at least to workers at the factory but that health issue for everyone else is an unknown. Scary what companies do.
    I’m looking at look microwave popcorn … .

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