Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

He seems like a smart guy, but JFC, what a dick!

Since when do we limit our critiques to things we could do better ourselves?

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

Wake up. Grow up. Get in the fight.

GOP baffled that ‘we don’t care if you die’ is not a winning slogan.

Lick the third rail, it tastes like chocolate!

Today in our ongoing national embarrassment…

If you don’t believe freedom is for everybody, then the thing you love isn’t freedom, it is privilege.

… riddled with inexplicable and elementary errors of law and fact

Reality always gets a vote in the end.

Dumb motherfuckers cannot understand a consequence that most 4 year olds have fully sorted out.

The Supreme Court cannot be allowed to become the ultimate, unaccountable arbiter of everything.

Following reporting rules is only for the little people, apparently.

“When somebody takes the time to draw up a playbook, they’re gonna use it.”

You would normally have to try pretty hard to self-incriminate this badly.

Also, are you sure you want people to rate your comments?

Fuck these fucking interesting times.

If you tweet it in all caps, that makes it true!

They want us to be overwhelmed and exhausted. Focus. Resist. Oppose.

We are builders in a constant struggle with destroyers. keep building.

My years-long effort to drive family and friends away has really paid off this year.

If you are still in the gop, you are either an extremist yourself, or in bed with those who are.

Every decision we make has lots of baggage with it, known or unknown.

Is it negotiation when the other party actually wants to shoot the hostage?

You are here: Home / All the illusions were just a parade

All the illusions were just a parade

by | 196 Comments

This post is in: 

I’ll be voting for Hillary later today.  Why?  I think she seems smarter than Bernie.  Either one would be a fine president.

I won’t attempt to convince anyone to agree with me because I’ve become skeptical of the value of reason itself.  I now believe this:

 

Our hypothesis is that the function of reasoning is argumentative. It is to devise and evaluate arguments intended to persuade. Reasoning so conceived is adaptive given the exceptional dependence of humans on communication and their vulnerability to misinformation. A wide range of evidence in the psychology of reasoning and decision making can be reinterpreted and better explained in the light of this hypothesis. Poor performance in standard reasoning tasks is explained by the lack of argumentative context. When the same problems are placed in a proper argumentative setting, people turn out to be skilled arguers. Skilled arguers, however, are not after the truth but after arguments supporting their views.

I used to feel bad that our political system might be collapsing under the weight of its own derp, but now I feel that perhaps it’s no worse than any other political system.  Human beings exist largely to create and consume derp.

Reader Interactions

196Comments

  1. 1.

    Luthe

    I feel like there should be some credit give that at least it’s collective derp, and not the derp of one individual. We’ve made progress like that.

    (and yes, Hillary is definitely the smarter one)

  2. 2.

    lamh36

    Lordt am I tired of this entire primary fight.

    Louisiana primary is long gone, thank God (not that it matter since last I heard us Southern folks votes don’t mean much)

    I have already decided to abstain from visiting a blog on my blogroll that I actually liked to read on the daily. The longer this thing goes on, the more of a habit it becomes to ignore a few of my fav blogs.

    ugh…

  3. 3.

    singfoom

    Human beings exist largely to create and consume derp.

    I came here for an ARGUMENT! Ok, not really. I would agree with the above quote but add the following. Humans ARE derp.

  5. 5.

    Mnemosyne

    @lamh36:

    The crazy Bernfeeler on my Facebook has started winding down and returning to normal, so I think we’re getting close to the end.

    But, then, I still suspect that part of the reason she was getting so worked up was that all three of her kids kept getting sick one after the other and she was seriously sleep-deprived. Before that happened, she was making arguments and expressing support, not telling Hillary to DIAF.

  6. 6.

    bystander

    Voted for Clinton. This election is in some ways the opposite of 2008 for me. I voted for Clinton then, too, because I felt Obama was naive and unprepared. Then I started to listen to Obama more extensively and to read about him more deeply, and I came to support him wholeheartedly. And I agree with those who single Obama out as among our greatest Presidents.

    This cycle I started off wanting to like Sanders, if only because of Clintonfatigue. As time has gone on, Sanders has looked less and less capable, less and less equipped for the job. From the time Clinton came into her own in that ridiculous charade of an interrogation, she’s looked more and more presidential.

  7. 7.

    Germy

    Human beings exist largely to create and consume derp.

    It took me many years to reach that conclusion, and it’s a sound one.

  11. 11.

    Ridnik Chrome

    Also voting for Hillary. I like Sanders’ message, but I think he’s the wrong candidate. He has no institutional power base, and would be politically weak and ineffectual as president. As such he would harm more than help the working class/liberal cause. I voted for Obama in 2008, and was somewhat surprised (and even bemused) to find myself supporting Clinton this time around. I take it as one more sign that I’m getting old…

  13. 13.

    David ?Canadian Anchor Baby? Koch

    @CNN BREAKING NEWS ALERT

    New York Exit Poll:

    83% of NYers who eat hot dogs w/mustard & pickles voting for Clinton
    41% of NYers who eat hot dogs plain voting for Sanders

  23. 23.

    Peale

    @David ?Canadian Anchor Baby? Koch: I can’t stand pickles. Hate them passionately. Don’t mind pickle juice as a hiccup cure, but unless I’m hiccupping, there’s no point to pickles. But I won’t be eating my hot dogs plain. That’s just outrageous.

  25. 25.

    Mnemosyne

    @lamh36:

    I think that’s what pisses me off most about police shootings, even beyond the loss of lives. It’s the lack of accountability. I’m sorry, but there is no excuse for accidentally shooting someone you didn’t even know was there.

    And, frankly, every time one of these idiots gets let off with a slap on the wrist, it makes all cops look bad. Do the police unions honestly not get that? Jaysus.

  26. 26.

    WaterGirl

    @lamh36: Fuck. Always empathy for the cops and apparently none to spare for people those cops have murdered. Or their loved ones.

  29. 29.

    Kropadope

    @dmsilev:

    Yes, but what about the vital eats-pizza-with-a-fork demographic?

    @Mike J: All Cruz.

    So Trump didn’t even vote for himself then? Figures since he probably doesn’t actually want to be president and, even if he did, almost certainly missed that six-month(?!?!?) registration cutoff.

  33. 33.

    Aimai

    Another good book on this topic is “mistakes were made but not by me.” Very good review of the work on motivated reasoning, argument, etc…

  34. 34.

    jl

    @Ridnik Chrome:

    ” What about the ones who eat hot dogs with ketchup? ”
    They have been all driven out out NY long ago,by right-thinking and outraged mobs, I think.

  35. 35.

    singfoom

    @dmsilev: @dmsilev: I’ve never understood this, but I’m not a New Yorker. When presented with a giant slice of pizza, many times the tip flaps down in a way that is uneatable, even if you fold.

    So, I eat the floppy pizza tip with a knife and fork (or just fork) and then fold it once the floppy part is gone. I’ll never make it in NYC politics I guess.

  37. 37.

    David Fud

    Doug!, just because you are feeling quite cynical doesn’t mean that the use of reason has to be limited to derp. Intelligence evolved for better competing in the arms race of Darwin’s game. We all carry around DNA that instructs our cells in how to work together and thereby carry our genes around. However, we can create our own meaning and accomplish extraordinary things nonetheless. If you limit the use of reason to its evolved purpose only to win an argument so they can get what they want, which may coincide with how many people use it, you leave out many wonderful applications.

    So, don’t despair for the whole race based on the Average Man’s use of rational arguments.

  38. 38.

    David ?Canadian Anchor Baby? Koch

    @CNN BREAKING NEWS ALERT

    New York Exit Poll:

    76% of NYers who invest in 401Ks voting for Clinton

    81% of NYers who bury money in old coffee can in back yard voting for Sanders

  39. 39.

    Technocrat

    At this point, I have to believe the FPers are just going for T-Boggs.

    Not judging, mind you.

    ETA: Just how many of you guys live in NY??

  40. 40.

    Kropadope

    @ Bobby Thompson: I was the one and thank you. Also, your link encompasses your Reply button.

    What about the ones who eat hot dogs with ketchup? Savages. Probably Trump voters, to a man…

    Sorry, what else would you put ketchup on? Besides maybe eggs, but only if they’re scrambled.

  41. 41.

    Mnemosyne

    @Kropadope:

    If you were from Chicago, you’d know that you’re supposed to put a pickle spear AND relish on your hot dog.

    But not ketchup. Never ketchup. Legend has it that’s why Carol Moseley-Braun lost her last election.

  44. 44.

    chopper

    @Kropadope:

    Sorry, what else would you put ketchup on? Besides maybe eggs, but only if they’re scrambled.

    i just threw up a little.

  45. 45.

    Peale

    @Bobby Thomson: @Bobby Thomson: Hmmmm. Scruff is the social app for bears and cubs. I think all that shows is that bears are going for Hillary. Twinks for Bernie. Although my informal poll of NY Gay men has Hillary 5, Bernie 4 and Trump 1.

  46. 46.

    jl

    I head something in the news this morning that should go down in the annals of historical analogy fail: Trump’s CA campaign manager was first noticed by Trump because he wrote that Trump is so very reminiscent of Theodore Roosevelt.

    I hope in one way, Trump is reminiscent: that he run a third party campaign if he doesn’t get the GOP nomination.

  50. 50.

    Kropadope

    @Technocrat:

    At this point, I have to believe the FPers are just going for T-Boggs.

    Well, that will be hard to achieve if they keep putting up new posts.

  53. 53.

    CONGRATULATIONS!

    Human beings exist largely to create and consume derp.

    Damn, drop the mic, son. You flayed it and nailed it to the wall.

  54. 54.

    David ?Canadian Anchor Baby? Koch

    @CNN BREAKING NEWS ALERT

    New York Exit Poll:

    67% of NYers who use cell phone voting for Clinton

    92% of NYers who shout out windows voting for Sanders

  57. 57.

    Kropadope

    @Mnemosyne:

    But not ketchup. Never ketchup. Legend has it that’s why Carol Moseley-Braun lost her last election.

    Oh, I thought it had something to do with an African despot of some sort, man people will just come up with anything on the internet. Also, fun fact, she was one of my first three political donations. I donated to her, Kucinich, and Howard Dean the same day in late 2003. Dean got more, though, due to the plausibility factor.

  58. 58.

    Rommie

    Nobody bats an eye in Michigan (or at least Kalamazoo) at a ketchup-mustard-relish-onion Hot Dog. So it seems SO odd to think I’d get karate-chopped putting ketchup on a dog somewhere else.

    Chili Dogs, however – mustard only.

  60. 60.

    Kropadope

    @Citizen_X: You’re right, though depending on the fry I might prefer it plain. I also go for tartar sauce or tabasco (the tabasco only alongside the ketchup).

  62. 62.

    Miss Bianca

    @Rommie: Oh, *I* would have bat an eye at ketchup on a dog, when I lived there…mustard, or GTFO, back in Tha Day…ah, times have changed, indeed…

  63. 63.

    gwangung

    @Cermet:

    cream cheese on a hot dog!!? What the …you did come here for an argument!

    Admittedly, I have done too many shows on Seattle’s Capitol Hill and dealt with too many Amazon bro’s…

  64. 64.

    Hal

    I just voted for Hillary. I guess I’m more incrementalist than I thought. Thanks Obama. I live in upstate ny and it was a cinch. In and out in 2 minutes.

    One more time, I can’t wait for this primary to end. If Sanders wins I’ll be a fucking berniebro to the nth degree, but I’m not apologising for voting for Clinton either.

    I mentioned before how much I love perusing tumblr, especially humor blogs, but I constantly am being lectured about how wonderful Sanders is and how terrible Clinton is, in many cases by people a decade or more younger than me who wonder if people really know about Clinton. Then it’s fbi files and goldman Sachs. I just want my unadulterated dick jokes back!

    Also, my mother wanted to know why my gay/black/mixed race ass wasn’t voting for Trump and my sister recounted a story in which her and her coworker wondered if a woman was too emotional to be president. Please, no one every wonder why my cousin and I don’t talk politics with some of our family.

  65. 65.

    David ?Canadian Anchor Baby? Koch

    @CNN BREAKING NEWS ALERT

    New York Exit Poll:

    86% of NYers who love “Broad City” voting for Clinton

    77% of NYers who love “Curb Your Enthusiasm” voting for Sanders

  70. 70.

    lamh36

    @WaterGirl: one of a few actually, but yeah…it used to be a daily read for me. now I read a post, and keep it moving at the end of the week or whenever

  72. 72.

    Gimlet

    talkingpointsmemo.com/news/kansas-lawmakers-abandon-brownback-budget

    TOPEKA, Kan. (AP) — After he became Kansas governor in 2011, Sam Brownback slashed personal income taxes on the promise that the deep cuts would trigger a furious wave of hiring and expansion by businesses.

    But the “shot of adrenaline” hasn’t worked as envisioned, and the state budget has been in crisis ever since. Now many of the same Republicans who helped pass Brownback’s plan are in open revolt, refusing to help the governor cut spending so he can avoid rolling back any of his signature tax measures.

    If Brownback won’t reconsider any of the tax cuts, they say, he will have to figure out for himself how to balance the budget in the face of disappointing revenue.

    The governor argued that Kansas had to attract more businesses after a “lost decade” in the early 2000s, when private sector employment declined more than 4 percent. The predicted job growth from business expansions hasn’t happened, leaving the state persistently short of money.

    Last month, Brownback ordered $17 million in immediate reductions to universities and earlier this month delayed $93 million in contributions to pensions for school teachers and community college employees. The state has also siphoned off more than $750 million from highway projects to other parts of the budget over the past two years.

    Lawmakers are worried about approving any further reductions in an election year. All 40 Senate seats and 125 House seats are on the ballot in November.

    Brownback blames the economic sluggishness — the state ranked 43rd in total personal income growth in 2015 — on slumps in agriculture, energy production and aircraft manufacturing.

    “You’ve got some global issues that are going on that we have absolutely no control over,” Brownback told reporters at a recent news conference.

    But Scott Drenkard, an economist for the conservative Tax Foundation, told legislators last month that farmers and business owners appeared to pocket the extra money from the state’s recent tax cuts rather than use it for expansion — “tax avoidance, not job creation.”

  73. 73.

    bystander

    @Bobby Thomson:

    Someone was asking if there had been big gay polling.

    Fortune? Whew. For a moment I was afraid it was a link to Andrew Sullivan’s Grindr profile.

  76. 76.

    Peale

    @cleek: I used to respect you. But now…I just don’t know. There’s just so much to mustard. So many to try. Mayo is all the same. Ketchup is all the same. But mustard…every civilization has their own. Going without mustard? I think even the cave painters at Lascaux put mustard on their aurochs. How far back do you want to take us?

  78. 78.

    Botsplainer, Cryptofascist Tool of the Oppressor Class

    Goddammit – I’m on a diet. Tonight would be a fine night to drink and snack and read BJ for the TBOGG units and the Great Orange Satan for the howls of outraged anguish.

  81. 81.

    Kropadope

    @Peale:

    Ketchup is all the same

    Blind taste test Hunt’s and Heinz, then come back here and say that again.

  82. 82.

    Botsplainer, Cryptofascist Tool of the Oppressor Class

    Mayo and mustard on burgers AND dogs. Everyone knows this.

    ETA – Now you know why I’m on the diet.

    Shooting for chart weight by summer’s end.

  83. 83.

    David ?Canadian Anchor Baby? Koch

    @CNN BREAKING NEWS ALERT

    New York Exit Poll:

    89% of NYers who have been bankrupted four times voting for Trump

    41% of NYers who used DC Madam services voting for Cruz

    67% of NYers who yell at tee vee during game shows voting for Kasich

  86. 86.

    JCT

    Whoa – anyone see Elizabeth Warren’s RIGHTEOUS tweet-fest re: Ted Cruz’ pathetic whiny “running for President is hard!!” email request for $$. It was awesome.
    Stop crying, Ted

  87. 87.

    david10

    @Cermet: HERESY-ballpark mustard or nothing. Get on with your fancy schmancy, euro trash, stone ground, artisan brown stuff.

  88. 88.

    Jay C

    I did my civic duty at 10:40 this morning, to try to beat the crowd: worked like a charm, ‘cuz when I walked into the middle-school gym which is our local precinct*, the poll workers outnumbered the voters by a decent margin. I hope the thin turnout WAS a function of the hour, and not a harbinger of the participation-level for the primary: this is, after all the same precinct that took me 1h50m to vote at in 2012 …

    *UES Manhattan

  93. 93.

    Botsplainer, Cryptofascist Tool of the Oppressor Class

    @david10:

    Try putting some of that artisan stone ground in the middle of your next grilled cheese sandwich prior to grilling.

    You’ll thank me for it.

  94. 94.

    Botsplainer, Cryptofascist Tool of the Oppressor Class

    @WaterGirl:

    You are allowed to slop some A1 sauce from a steak onto sunnyside up eggs during a salty hangover breakfast.

  95. 95.

    Peale

    @WaterGirl: I shall defend ketchup on eggs. But it’s best on over-hard eggs on fried-egg sandwiches. Not just scrambled. Sometimes, you just gotta live a little.

  96. 96.

    WaterGirl

    @Mike J: whoa! definitely not good for bernie.

    edit: thanks for the link! I’m going to look that over more closely.

  101. 101.

    Kropadope

    @Botsplainer, Cryptofascist Tool of the Oppressor Class:

    Never, ever tried Hunt’s. Heinz or nothing for me.

    You have done a good thing for yourself.

    @WaterGirl:

    At this point, I don’t care who you vote for. But no ketchup on eggs. Ever!

    It’s cool, more flavorful than fresh tomatoes, and adds just the right amount of salt. Iould be just that I’ve been eating ketchup on my scrambled eggs since childhood, but that is probably my favorite thing to put ketchup on.

  102. 102.

    Frankensteinbeck

    Humans are not rational animals. Humans are animals capable of reason. All psychology research for the past hundred plus years has returned that our basic processes are unreasonable, based off of emotion, and we build excuses on top of them. Yes, we can use logic, but it takes effort and lots of it if our emotions are strong. Cognitive Dissonance isn’t a theory that says humans need logic, it’s a theory that we use logic to cover our actions. Freud is the Father of Modern Psychology not because of his messed up sexual theories, but because he gave us the (now thoroughly proven) theory that we only think we know what we’re thinking. We really can’t see well inside our own heads.

  105. 105.

    Hal

    Also, I liked what John Hodgman wrote about why he’s voting for Hillary…

    Hillary Clinton for President
    This is going to disappoint some of my friends, and maybe that’s why I’ve been quiet about this until now.
    Also, who cares what I think?
    But here is what I think: Hillary Clinton for President.
    I think Sen. Bernie Sanders has been an inspiring, provocative, necessary, and admirable public servant for decades.
    I respect the personal moral and practical math that has led each of his supporters to turn out for him. And I’m grateful to and a little in awe of the movement for keeping issues I care about at the center of this race.
    But I have done my own moral and practical math, and I have decided that I would really, actively like to see a Hillary Clinton presidency.
    I have grown up with her in my political life. There have been times I have supported her and not supported her. I appreciate that she has made big mistakes, both in office and while seeking it.
    And she has made enormous, at times disheartening compromises and changed positions. But I don’t think she has done worse than anyone who seriously wishes to win office in our present system.
    There is no question that she is personally ambitious, though she is one of the few candidates who is ever blamed for it.
    The question is, what is her ambition? To make money? Impossible. She’s doing fine. To get power? She’s had it. To get ALL the power, because she is power mad? That’s a creepy conspiracy theory that doesn’t ring true to me.
    I think her ambition is, and has long been, to be the President of the United States, like everyone else in the race, and also to make policy.
    I think it’s reasonable to say based on her career that she likes making policy.
    Moreover, I think she wants to make the best policy possible in an antagonistic-by-design political process that she has known and wrestled with for decades, and keep that policy in place.
    Moreover, I think she wants to make policy that I largely agree with.
    And I think she can do it.
    No one can succeed 100% of the time in our system. But I think she can foster policies that will capitalize on the initial gains made by President Obama, whom I supported and still do, and surely, if slowly, move our nation closer to the ideals that I embrace.
    Will it be fast? No. But there is a lot to do to shift the the nation’s policies back after the slow, economically rightward/socially intolerant swing that began with Ronald Reagan and peaked with the reelection of George W. Bush in 2004.
    (A swing, by the way, that was patiently planned, deliberately funded, and slow by design. Major change is ALWAYS incremental. Unless you want to have a REAL revolution, with shooting and stuff. You might. I do not.)
    Just because the social and economic right wing are in flailing, comic disarray at the moment, it doesn’t mean they are not a force. Or that conservative voters are not still our friends, family, neighbors, and fellow citizens.
    I don’t think this is a time to laugh at the Republican party.
    I think it is a moment to consolidate and continue our gains, enact new progressive policies; let existing progressive policies mature in place; offer independent and new voters the allure of continuity, professionalism, and effectiveness; and gradually regain the congress.
    (This makes me sound pretty conservative for a liberal! And maybe that’s just who I am now in my 45th year as a human)
    I will certainly vote for and work for Sen. Sanders should he gain the nomination.
    But today I am voting for Hillary Clinton.
    Yes, she has wanted this job for a long time. There is no crime in that. It’s in the constitution! I think she’s earned it. And while I cannot predict the future, I am curious and eager to see what she does once she gets it.
    So that’s what I think.
    I trust you think differently. We are different humans.
    I don’t wish to discuss this online, but if you see me on the street, I’d be happy to talk to you about it.
    In any case, please vote, and
    thank you for your attention, and
    That is all.

    johnhodgman.com/post/143058929838/hillary-clinton-for-president

  106. 106.

    Cermet

    @david10: well, I did come here for an argument but I didn’t think of the euro trash, stone ground, artisan brown mustard – wow, that is a class above even standard Amerikan brown mustard. Somehow you won that argument despite being wrong …

  107. 107.

    Peale

    Russian mustard on hot dogs. Hot-n-sweet mustard on hot dogs. Brown deli on hot dogs. Ball bark on hot dogs. German senf. It all works. Why can’t we just come together?

  108. 108.

    Technocrat

    @Mike J:

    What in the world would make someone put cream cheese on a hot dog??

    When the bars close down in Capitol Hill, Belltown and Ballard, hungry drunk people

    Ok, got it.

  109. 109.

    chopper

    @david10:

    the only real mustard is when you grow the plants yourself biodynamically, harvest the seeds by hand and grind them using a mortar and pestle handed down from your great grandmother.

  111. 111.

    Gimlet

    Interesting.

    nypost.com/2016/04/19/54000-brooklyn-voters-vanish-ahead-of-primary-day/

    In a pre-primary bombshell, the city’s Board of Elections was pummeled with questions Monday about how 54,000 Democratic voters vanished from the rolls in Brooklyn.

    The board said the numbers changed because many once-active voters were moved to the inactive list.

    But that list grew by only 9,154 voters — from 82,807 to 91,961 — leaving 54,404 Brooklyn voters missing.

    Voters on the inactive list can still cast a ballot if they live in the city.

    But the “missing” voters are out of luck — their names have been stricken from the records.

  112. 112.

    Mnemosyne

    @Kropadope:

    It was mostly the corruption charges, which did seem to have some basis in fact (always a bad idea to be pallsy with dictators). But the ketchup thing was the final straw.

  116. 116.

    Miss Bianca

    @Hal: I like that, too. Certainly more tactful and eloquent than my own, “I hope Hillary Clinton beats Bernie Sanders like a rented mule and sends him back to the back benches where he belongs.”

  117. 117.

    starscream

    @JCT: Wow, thank you for that. I’m so glad I watched her on The Daily Show back in 2009ish. Loved her ever since.

  118. 118.

    david10

    @Gimlet: My favorite derp-When the economy finally began to recover during Clinton’s first term, the Repubs claimed that it was Reagan’s policies finally kicking in. Brownback will be the same.

  119. 119.

    Botsplainer, Cryptofascist Tool of the Oppressor Class

    @Kropadope:

    It’s cool, more flavorful than fresh tomatoes, and adds just the right amount of salt. Iould be just that I’ve been eating ketchup on my scrambled eggs since childhood, but that is probably my favorite thing to put ketchup on.

    I’m a sucker for Cholula sauce (any kind of hot sauce, really) on eggs, whether they be scrambled, boiled or fried. My favorite is chorizo, onion and eggs for a normal day. Steak, A1 and eggs sunnyside up or once over, soft, for a hangover day.

  120. 120.

    Jeffro

    @Kropadope: you’d put ketchup up on everything, of course… Many foods and most fried foods in fact , in reality just ketchup delivery devices

  123. 123.

    scav

    @lamh36:

    NYPD cop Peter Liang gets community service for killing Akai Gurley

    Immediate thought. At least there’s overt recognition that merely being a cop is no longer providing a community service.

    (as always, qualifications come later. & the gut reaction barely begins to provide any sort of silk purse out of the pigs ear.)

  126. 126.

    WaterGirl

    @JCT: She is on fire! I am taking a moment for silence in honor of all the arrogant males on faculty committees who tried to dismiss Elizabeth Warren because she’s female. They helped make Elizabeth Warren who she is today.

    Dear Senator Warren:
    I love you madly.
    Signed, WaterGirl

  127. 127.

    Highway Rob

    John Cole’s own goddamned blog has a fight over goddamned mustard and more than 100 goddamned comments in and goddamned no one comes out in favor of missing goddamned mustard. What are we even doing here, people?

  128. 128.

    Cermet

    @david10: In the year 2123, a great grand child of Brownback will make this claim just as Kansas’ economy finally recovers as he stands in front of the ocean on the new beach front property that just formed in Kansas thanks to AGW. Unfortunately, a super tornado immediately kills hims seconds later … .

  133. 133.

    different-church-lady

    Either one would be a fine president.

    Weak tea, Doug. We could have gone for a triple TBogg, but you had to go all mushy on us.

  135. 135.

    Technocrat

    @Kropadope:

    Yeah, I have to jump on the ketchup+eggs bandwagon here. Not only is it delicious, the color palette is outstanding. Especially with a few chives.

  136. 136.

    scav

    @gwangung: Oh, it was a pure self-preservation reflex that kicked up that thought. Can’t image the full gamut of reactions a community that has grown up with similar expectations / experience could produce.

  137. 137.

    The Lodger

    @Kropadope: Whole pickles on a hot dog belong in Chicago, not NYC. Not to mention tomato wedges, asparagus spears, tree bark and the other ridiculous things they use for garnish.

  139. 139.

    david10

    @A Ghost To Most: Oh god, wimpy burgers in London in 1968. Served in a bowl brimming with grease and an egg on top-I suddenly realized I was in a foreign country.

  140. 140.

    Miss Bianca

    @Bobby Thomson: I was particularly intrigued by this nugget of information, for some reason – “The company says its app users who are interested in fetish are also 30% more likely to vote Sanders.”

  146. 146.

    Sicilian Dish

    I used to believe that Politics was different than religion, in that, one used reason and rational thought to win the day. One could convince an opponent with logic. Dubya got appointed and I lost all hope that reason and logic had anything to do with it. Politics is Religion.

  147. 147.

    ? Martin

    @Technocrat:

    What in the world would make someone put cream cheese on a hot dog??

    I know where you are coming from, but if you’ve never had cream cheese and pastrami sandwich, you’re really missing out. My objection to the hot dog is that a hot dog is not supposed to be fancy. We have a shitton of things to fancy up, let the hot dog own it’s place in the world. It’s great there, and shouldn’t be fussed with.

    And if you put catsup on a hot dog, you’re going straight to hell.

  148. 148.

    Mnemosyne

    @Gimlet:

    How do you not get it? If we’re aggressive and competitive
    The union gets a boost. You’d rather give it a sedative?

    (“You” obviously being Brownback in this use, not you.)

  149. 149.

    different-church-lady

    @cleek: It’s the new defensive offense: preemptively de-legitimatize an election that hasn’t even been held yet.

  152. 152.

    A Ghost To Most

    @david10:
    London,in1968. That explains a lot. The one time I was in Belgium (85), I ordered it in a bar,and it was delicious.

  154. 154.

    Mnemosyne

    @Frankensteinbeck:

    There was a really interesting study recently on people who were essentially emotionless due to a specific type of brain damage. It turned out that not having an emotional reaction to anything made it almost impossible to make even the simplest of decisions. They would spend hours trying to decide between a blue or black pen, because there is absolutely no logical reason to choose one over the other. It was fascinating.

  157. 157.

    JCT

    @WaterGirl: Yup, as a academic woman in a very male-dominated field I learned quickly to stand up and not back down, Warren really gets in there and stands her ground. An inspiration.

  158. 158.

    Brachiator

    @? Martin:

    I know where you are coming from, but if you’ve never had cream cheese and pastrami sandwich, you’re really missing out

    Why would a sane person put cream cheese on pastrami?

  159. 159.

    Technocrat

    @? Martin:

    I could be persuaded to try cream cheese and pastrami. Pastrami is dry-ish, and the CC would retain it’s texture. However, a good hot dog gushes with each juicy, savory bite. Hot dog juice and dissolving cream cheese…uhhh nope.

    No, I am not overthinking this. One must have standards.

  161. 161.

    Johnnybuck

    Ketchup is for fried potato products, and nothing else.
    Heinz is the only real Ketchup.

    I voted for Hillary months ago (so it seems) in Georgia.
    Can’t wait to do it again.

  163. 163.

    Technocrat

    @Mnemosyne:

    Oh, whew – I can see a spear. I was imagining trying to balance an entire pickle, on a hot dog, in a bun. The mind boggles.

  164. 164.

    different-church-lady

    @WaterGirl: I have a rule for myself: if I have a craving, I give in immediately. Because if I don’t, I’ll eat a bunch of other stuff and then give in and eat the thing I was craving on top of that. Giving in right away saves me a lot of calories.

  165. 165.

    Mnemosyne

    Ketchup in Mexico was different (thinner in texture) but zingier. I think it was Hunt’s, but it didn’t taste like American Hunt’s.

  166. 166.

    Kay

    If you have to fast for a blood test can you drink black coffee?

    Someone say “yes” :)

  167. 167.

    Mnemosyne

    @different-church-lady:

    That’s usually the best way to go. Just make sure it’s a real craving, not just, “Oh, this donut is in front of my face, I should eat it.”

    My rule is, if I’m willing to get into the car and drive somewhere to get it, it’s a craving.

  168. 168.

    Brachiator

    @Botsplainer, Cryptofascist Tool of the Oppressor Class:

    Mayo and mustard on burgers AND dogs. Everyone knows this.

    Growing up in Texas, most people I knew put only mustard on hamburgers. Sometimes mayo and mustard. You never put mayo on dogs. Never. Not even if you were a commie.

    I visited some relatives in Denver and we went to a burger joint where they put mayo, no mustard on burgers. Thought I was going to die.

    Once had a pastrami sandwich with mayo. Took it back to the deli. Told the guy, the knife that you use to put mustard on a pastrami sandwich should not even come into contact with mayo. Don’t even wave it over a mayo jar.

  173. 173.

    Technocrat

    @Kay:

    I just did that recently, and I was told yes.

    @Mnemosyne:

    And if you’ll get in the car at 3AM, your wife is pregnant.

    ETA: Or you are =)

  175. 175.

    Mnemosyne

    @Kay:

    Google says no, but it partly depends on what you’re being tested for. Mayo Clinic website says black coffee 2 hours or more before the test is still okay because your body metabolizes coffee pretty quickly.

  178. 178.

    JCT

    @Brachiator: When I was first dating my native New Yorker husband I used to make jokes about ordering pastrami with mayo to torment him. He always chuckled , but made me promise to never make that joke in front of his parents since they already suspected I wasn’t Jewish. Classic.

  179. 179.

    different-church-lady

    Okay, okay, okay… let’s get this TBOGG MACHINE CRANKING

    Imani Gandy ‏@AngryBlackLady

    When did voter suppression start meaning a bunch of white people who forgot to change their party affiliation and follow primary rules?

  180. 180.

    Felonius Monk

    @JCT:

    make jokes about ordering pastrami with mayo to torment him

    I used to order pastrami with mayo and mustard. Always tasted pretty good, but now I just prefer Russian dressing.

  182. 182.

    Technocrat

    @Felonius Monk:

    Always tasted pretty good, but now I just prefer Russian dressing

    My friend, you basically just messed up a Reuben. Have you no shame??

  186. 186.

    Felonius Monk

    @Technocrat:

    Have you no shame??

    Actually, no. The mustard and mayo was in a place that served their sandwiches on hamburger rolls. Their roast beef, corned beef, and pastrami were all excellent but they did not have russian dressing.

    But, OTOH, I was young and naive at the time.

  187. 187.

    Mnemosyne

    @Doug!:

    I’ll see if I can find a link when I’m not on my phone at work. The conclusion was that our emotions play a part in way more of our everyday decision making than scientists realized.

    Also demonstrated that the dudes who scream at me that THEIR decision is totally, 100 percent logic-based while my girly decisions are merely emotion-based are just as full of shit as I always thought, but that’s pretty much a given already.

  188. 188.

    cbear

    @? Martin:

    but if you’ve never had cream cheese and pastrami sandwich, you’re really missing out.

    Sing it, brother.
    And cream cheese with Black Forest Ham on rye is for realz too.

  189. 189.

    Felonius Monk

    @Kropadope:

    Cholula’s my current favorite hot sauce

    El Yucateco ain’t bad, but my favorite is Red Rectum which is made in Costa Rica and distributed by a company out of NOLA.

  191. 191.

    Elie

    @Cermet:

    OH — but you are SOOOOO wrong! Along with the dill spear, green relish, onions and tomatores — is yellow mustard!

  192. 192.

    Technocrat

    @PST:

    I want you to know, it took me nearly 30 minutes to get that. I’m not sure which of us is to blame.

  193. 193.

    aimai

    @Mnemosyne: That is discussed extensively in my favorite book of all time “Descartes Error” by Antonio Damasio (I think that’s his name) and his latest book Self Comes to Mind. Its not that they don’t have any emotion but that they lack a sense of urgency or time.

  195. 195.

    TriassicSands

    I think she seems smarter than Bernie.

    Using “intelligence” as a reason to support one candidate over another — assuming the other candidate isn’t a dolt — is not only risky, but probably unwise. Intelligence is not one thing. Hillary almost certainly has a higher IQ than Sanders, but that kind of intelligence is no guarantee of success — at almost anything. Judgment is as important as IQ intelligence and Clinton really seems to fall short in that quality. Wouldn’t the more intelligent candidate run a great campaign? Especially after having already gone the distance in one presidential nominating process. But for all her good qualities, Clinton is a lousy candidate and the problem usually arises out of poor judgment. I think Clinton’s judgment depends in part on her advisers and there I suspect Bernie would have better, much more progressive advisers than Clinton.

    I’ll vote for Clinton, but despite being intelligent, she is ofter too clever by half and that comes back to haunt her. Part of her failing is her seeming obliviousness to the obvious reality that she is going to be treated unfairly. Knowing that, she should act accordingly — like not using a private email account whether or not it is legal. That was poor judgment and a lack of foresight. It doesn’t matter that what she did was the same thing Colin Powell did. She should have known she would be judged differently and used a government account.

    IQ type intelligence only gets a person so far.

Comments are closed.

Trackbacks