Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Being the leader of the world means to be the leader of peace.

The words do not have to be perfect.

Putting aside our relentless self-interest because the moral imperative is crystal clear.

Today’s GOP: why go just far enough when too far is right there?

Let’s not be the monsters we hate.

if you can’t see it, then you are useless in the fight to stop it.

Thanks to your bullshit, we are now under siege.

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

“Jesus paying for the sins of everyone is an insult to those who paid for their own sins.”

The party of Reagan has become the party of Putin.

Optimism opens the door to great things.

I’d hate to be the candidate who lost to this guy.

No offense, but this thread hasn’t been about you for quite a while.

Authoritarian republicans are opposed to freedom for the rest of us.

All your base are belong to Tunch.

Second rate reporter says what?

The poor and middle-class pay taxes, the rich pay accountants, the wealthy pay politicians.

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

Accountability, motherfuckers.

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

I see no possible difficulties whatsoever with this fool-proof plan.

Bark louder, little dog.

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167Comments

  4. 4.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    jeb! flack on the O’Donnell show (because I am too lazy to reach for the remote and can’t change the channel from my keyboard) arguing that the iCarly pick is a brill move!

    There’d be more dignity in going back to work for his dad.

  8. 8.

    chopper

    i can’t get over it. cruz is already picking out drapes for the WH.

    he probably wants to replace the basketball hoops in the WH gym with those new-fangled “rings”.

  10. 10.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    someone is jealous of all that face time Chris Christie is getting lately, and making such a hash of

    Donald J. Trump ‏@ realDonaldTrump 8h8 hours ago
    Thank you Newt!
    Donald J. Trump Retweeted Newt Gingrich
    Newt Gingrich @ newtgingrich
    This was a serious foreign policy speech by Trump. It is worth reading and thinking about. It will be ridiculed by Washington elites.

  12. 12.

    Splitting Image

    The only bad thing about Cruz picking Fiorina is that it makes it doubly sad that he isn’t going to be the nominee.

    However, I remain confident that whoever Trump eventually picks will make Fiorina seem like a solid pick by comparison.

  13. 13.

    Punchy

    John, can you believe this Gar-field of GOPers so Odie-ous? I guess thats the new Nermal. Seems like they want to return to an era of Jim Crow and Jefferson Davis…say, perhaps, a Jim Davis era…

  17. 17.

    aimai

    I love the blacklist! I would watch it all over again if I had the free time. Sad I’ve watched all the way through to the current end of season. crawling into bed, watching tv, and eating ice cream sounds PERFECT to me.

  18. 18.

    NR

    A couple of RedState frontpagers have promised not to vote for Trump. I wonder if it’ll hold until November.

  22. 22.

    Botsplainer, Cryptofascist Tool of the Oppressor Class

    Just watched a Cruz commercial aimed at Indiana. Lots of stills of sad-faced white people as Ted’s high-pitched, nasally whine drones on about how miserable everybody is and how he’s going to repeal Obamacare and roll back the EPA.

    Each time that shit runs, he loses another 5000 votes…

  24. 24.

    jl

    LOL FIORINA. would make a good song for a line dance.
    And since the lyrics and backstory for Macarena can mean almost anything, we need a parody Lol Fiorina.
    Need to toe work in ‘Cruz’ somehow.

  26. 26.

    patroclus

    I think we should be both consistent and unpredictable in our relationship with TanZANia and San BORNadino; I think we should prevent Iran from getting a nuclear weapon and I think the Iran nuclear deal is a DISASTER. I think we should work with our Muslim allies but not allow any of them to enter the U.S.; I think we should maintain strong alliances while we are rethinking all of our solemn treaties, I think we should be a strong and reliable ally while we implement a secret plan to defeat ISIS.

  27. 27.

    dmsilev

    @NR:

    A couple of RedState frontpagers have promised not to vote for Trump. I wonder if it’ll hold until November.

    I give it, at most, until 30 seconds after Trump’s convention speech.

  28. 28.

    LAO

    @Linnaeus: Once the Rangers got knocked out, no more invested for me. I do expect to enjoy the rest of the playoffs (even if the islanders win).

  31. 31.

    satby

    Reposted from downstairs because I’m a proud aunt: my niece just put up a cool T-shirt she’s selling in her Etsy shop, all proceeds go to the Chicago area rescue Precious Pets Almost Home. Another redheaded rescuer in the family, I’m so proud!

    It’s the Hissfits T-shirt. I’m not quite cool enough to remember whether the Misfits is a band or a zombie movie.

  32. 32.

    redshirt

    @dmsilev: After Trump pivots to bein’ Presidential. Then they can all jump on board.

    We’re already seeing the beginning of it with the praise for that joke of a foreign policy speech.

  33. 33.

    Jeffro

    @Splitting Image:

    I remain confident that whoever Trump eventually picks will make Fiorina seem like a solid pick by comparison.

    It’ll be interesting to see if Trump (or more accurately, Manafort) picks a retired general/admiral who’ll go along for the ride, or if he picks a female GOP elected official of some sort (like Ernst or Sanchez). And of course it matters diddly squat, except for the potential to offend military voters & veterans, women, Hispanics, or all of the above depending upon the words he choses when he introduces the Veep.

    Also be interesting to get Christie’s reaction when it’s not him…

  36. 36.

    Benw

    @Punchy: I Calvin’t believe your comment! That Hobbes to be one of the more awesome ones I’ve seen. Watt are you, son? A professional punner? About Wormwood we get to see another one? As Susie as possible, I hope. Bill done!

  37. 37.

    LAO

    I understand that there are pundits on tv saying that Cruz’s announcement of Forina as his VP is a brilliant move but I just can’t see it. It looks like weakness to me, an acknowledgment that he can’t beat Trump alone and that he is not appealing to enough Republicans. I simply don’t get this move.

  40. 40.

    Technocrat

    @efgoldman:

    a caravan of neighbors came in, carrying all the boxes and all the contents, They thought they saw someone trying to break in so they went and rescued all the stuff, and when they saw the sheriff’s car they brought it back.

    People can be amazing in the same trip you see how awful they are. Stay strong.

  41. 41.

    Bobby Thomson

    With Fiorina providing an assist, Cruz should be able to drive to the basketball ring.

  43. 43.

    Technocrat

    @NR:

    More than a couple. It’s basically become NeverTrumpState.

    Many will come around, but the Palin Effect was real in 2008, and it will have some impact this cycle.

  45. 45.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @efgoldman: I am glad that you came through a horrible thing with the ability to still toss some humor into the mix. Your family is in my thoughts.

  48. 48.

    hamletta

    @efgoldman:

    Can they even spell h-o-c-k-e-y in Nashville?

    Hey now! It’s the Athens of the South, son!

    And surprised the shit out of me, Nashville goes apey for the Preds!

  51. 51.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Jeffro:

    I have a vague recollection, but can’t be arsed to look for it, that Trump said a few weeks ago that his VP pick would definitely be an elected official (he may have specified a member of Congress, obvs including Senators). Has Ernst endorsed him? Because I can easily see her as his choice. She would bring all kinds of balance:

    Male/female
    Big Eastern city boy/rural Midwesterner
    Businessman/farm girl
    No political experience/smidgen of political experience
    Oldish/youngish
    Resembles a pig/castrates pigs
    Made lots of bread in YUUUUGE deals/wore bread bags on feet in YUUUUGE snowstorms

  56. 56.

    SarahT

    @satby: Misfits the band: Sort of zombie-ish looking. Misfits the movie had Marilyn Monroe, Montgomery Clift, & Clark Gable in their final roles, but no zombies…unless they became zombies after their deaths…Coincidence, or did I just have too much to drink ? Hmmm…

  57. 57.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @redshirt: i think Palin, Brewer, Bachmann, or Blackburn would jump at the offer

    ETA:@SiubhanDuinne: i revoke my other predictions, ’cause this is too perfect. She’s also a veteran, I think a retired Lt Colonel, or full Colonel? as frightening as that may be

  63. 63.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @efgoldman:

    Oh my friend. I’m having my own good cry just reading your account. What an incredible fucking nightmare for everyone. Mrs. efg and her mother and cousin are very fortunate women to have you on their team, and the watchful neighbours sound pretty amazing too. Give your bride a hug from me, please.

    Okay, I’m off to the Yukon now….

  68. 68.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @efgoldman: About ten minutes later, a caravan of neighbors came in, carrying all the boxes and all the contents, They thought they saw someone trying to break in so they went and rescued all the stuff, and when they saw the sheriff’s car they brought it back. mrs efg and her mom went thru it, and had a good cry, and we brought most of it home. They knew the history of every piece, between them,

    I’m glad you had a moment of decency and kindness in the midst of such a difficult time for your family

  70. 70.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    She’s also a veteran, I think a retired Lt Colonel, or full Colonel? as frightening as that may be

    Totally forgot that, thanks! She really is perfect for him, isn’t she?

  71. 71.

    Aleta

    @patroclus: Our friends don’t like us. Our foes don’t respect us. No more free rides. Everyone is taking advantage of us. From Day 1, I will renegotiate NATO and everything else. My priority is to contain ISIS and defeat radical Isl., which I will do by working together with our allies and the Arab nations.

  73. 73.

    hamletta

    @efgoldman: No, silly, Athens is the Nashville of the South! (h/t my old improv buddy Don)

    “Athens of the South” is because of all the colleges there. It’s why there’s a Parthenon in Centennial Park. “Music City” is the more well-known nickname.

  74. 74.

    Technocrat

    @themann1086:

    I simply suggested forcing the rich to give up their benefits, which is hardly controversial or even consequential. My point was the system is rigged for the rich. Look at the things wealthy people can do legally to evade taxes. Look at corporate welfare, and who benefits.

    Say what??

    And Jim VandeHei wrote this? I’m trying to process that, not having much success.

    Tomorrow I expect it will be raining pizza or something.

  79. 79.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @SiubhanDuinne: Military career[edit]

    Ernst served as a lieutenant colonel in the logistics branch, commanding the 185th Combat Sustainment Support Battalion at Camp Dodge, the largest battalion in the Iowa Army National Guard.[11][12] Upon her retirement from the military in 2015, Ernst had served 23 years between the Army Reserve and the Army National Guard.[1] She spent 14 months in Kuwait in 2003–04 as a company commander during the Iraq War.[9][13][14]

  83. 83.

    burnspbesq

    @LAO:

    I do expect to enjoy the rest of the playoffs (even if the islanders win).

    That’s a bridge (or maybe a tunnel) too far.

  86. 86.

    trollhattan

    @Aleta:

    No one likes us-I don’t know why
    We may not be perfect, but heaven knows we try
    But all around, even our old friends put us down
    Let’s drop the big one and see what happens

    We give them money-but are they grateful?
    No, they’re spiteful and they’re hateful
    They don’t respect us-so let’s surprise them
    We’ll drop the big one and pulverize them

    Asia’s crowded and Europe’s too old
    Africa is far too hot
    And Canada’s too cold
    And South America stole our name
    Let’s drop the big one
    There’ll be no one left to blame us

    We’ll save Australia
    Don’t wanna hurt no kangaroo
    We’ll build an All American amusement park there
    They got surfin’, too

  87. 87.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @Amir Khalid: their chief foreign policy commenter is praising Trump’s speech. I thought Salon was bad during the last Walsh years, when they seemed to have Camile Puglia in rotation with Lady Lynn de Puma interviews

  90. 90.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Amir Khalid: I know, I know… But who the fuck is H.A. Goodman? I once had a dentist named Goodman. My insurance gave me a between him and a guy called Moriarty. I’ve read my Holmes; I was not going to bet into Moriarty’s clutches.

  97. 97.

    seaboogie

    @efgoldman: Thank you for sharing the story of your trip – you and mrs ef and family are in my thoughts. Lovely bit about the neighbors.

  99. 99.

    Elie

    @efgoldman:

    I had no idea, ef — I had somehow missed this very powerful and sad family story. You have my complete sympathy and caring. Lord have mercy — so much pain! Please give my best to Missus ef and that she is cared about and what she has been through resonates. Blessed be —

  109. 109.

    trollhattan

    @Aleta:
    If Drumph–countering the Cruz-Fiorina masterstroke–anointed Randy Newman as his sec-def I’d reconsider my vote.

    Just sayin’.

    Short fingers got
    No reason….

  113. 113.

    redshirt

    It is true the Trump poses challenges a traditional candidate would not.
    It’s also true Trump has a higher upside than Cruz.

    But he’s still going to get smoked and cause the Republican Party to further shrink (and grow more extreme).

  117. 117.

    Aleta

    @trollhattan:

    Karl, you never have seen such a glorious sight
    As these beautiful women arrayed for the night
    Just like countesses, empresses, movie stars and queens
    And they’d come there with men much like me
    Froggish men, unpleasant to see
    Were you to kiss one, Karl
    Nary a prince would there be

  121. 121.

    redshirt

    @efgoldman: But maybe a racist gets his wings at the same time?

    Isn’t that the calculation with Trump (if you can somehow see him winning): He’s bringing in new voters/turning Dems?

    It may be true to some small degree, but small, and totally outweighed by the people he pisses off who either don’t vote (R), or are motivated to vote (D).

  123. 123.

    feebog

    @efgoldman:

    I can’t imagine the pain and outrage your family is going through right now. Thinking good thoughts and wishing you eventually peace with all this someday. I know you will stay strong for the sake of your family. but take care of yourself as well.

  124. 124.

    starscream

    I’m concerned. Trump could win and would represent an existential threat to this country in ways that even Romney and McCain did not.

    Why the fuck are there term limits, again?

  125. 125.

    Adam L Silverman

    Just an FYI: I’m zapped. Been a long day. Will do the detailed analysis of the Trump speech today tomorrow. For anyone waiting for it tonight, sorry, but I’m plum tuckered out!

  129. 129.

    trollhattan

    @Adam L Silverman:
    It’s a science fact: nothing tuckers more than a plum. Get ye some rest and feed the rabble tomorrow. We can fight amongst ourselves in the meantime.

  130. 130.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @starscream: 1. Show me which states that Obama won in 2012 that Trump will take away.

    2. Term limits exist because of a Constitutional Amendment.

  132. 132.

    seaboogie

    @starscream: Nah – not gonna happen. What Omnes said, and I think a lot of Republicans will go “Cole” this election. Hasta los nominaciones!

  138. 138.

    Steeplejack

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    I will add that, though I haven’t seen it in years, the Parthenon in Nashville is truly impressive. It is a full-size replica of the original, and, besides being imposing and majestic in its own right, it is doubly so when you think of the original being built by a bunch of non-mechanized Greeks 2,400 years ago.

  139. 139.

    Elizabelle

    @efgoldman: So sad to hear this, bud. Hugs to you and Mrs. ef.

    Was Donna Mrs. ef’s sister? What a sad story.

    Again, so sorry to hear. Don’t think I’ll be around for a May meetup, but will catch the next one. Be well.

  146. 146.

    NotMax

    @SarahT

    Misfits is also a dark, edgy, tongue-firmly-in-cheek British series about disaffected young people who gain super powers. trailer

    5 seasons (season 4 was a disaster – different writers than the other seasons).

  147. 147.

    NotMax

    @efgoldman

    Have long maintained that the first step over the border into the Land of Old is the day one looks around and thinks, “When did they start hiring policeboys?”

    Happens at different times in life to everyone, but is inevitable.

  148. 148.

    Suzanne

    LOL + Fiorina = Lolerina. She is useless and I am enjoying watching Ted Cruz fail in a most embarrassing fashion.

  150. 150.

    Mnemosyne

    @efgoldman:

    I’m so sorry. It was hard enough when I lost a sibling last year, but at least it was to impersonal disease. To lose one the way Mrs. EF did is totally horrific. Again, my condolences to you both.

  151. 151.

    NotMax

    Rafael and Carleton sounds like a really, really bad vaudeville team, destined to play the deuce spot.

  152. 152.

    Peale

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: “trump hated the same people I hate on, for all the wrong reasons and his solutions make no sense and he lacks a grasp of the facts and reality, but because he hated on the people I hate on, it was worth watching.”

  153. 153.

    Yutsano

    @efgoldman: *hug*

    I can’t guarantee it will get any better or any easier, but I can guarantee it will fade. Not the memories, just the bad emotions.

  156. 156.

    danielx

    @efgoldman:

    An awful thing. May grace and peace be with you and yours.

    Also, too – were you thinking of Olivier as the (shudder) Nazi dentist in Marathon Man?

  158. 158.

    redshirt

    Did you see anything nice in Vermont? It’s a very pretty state.

    I can’t imagine though, because like you, it always unexpectedly snows when I drive there and everything is white knuckle.

  161. 161.

    different-church-lady

    @srv: Trump has problems with women he’s not going to sleep with.

    That’s a whoooooooole lot of women in this country. And one of them is going to be his opponent. The fact that he can’t get under her skin is going to get under his.

  162. 162.

    Amir Khalid

    @NotMax:
    In my case, it was when the doctors at the University of Malaya Medical Centre started calling me “Uncle”.

  163. 163.

    DaveInOz

    This is the life. Sitting in the Sunset Bar and Grill at Cable Beach, Broome, Western Australia watching the sun sink into the Indian Ocean. Sigh. Back to work next week.

  167. 167.

    nutella

    @Amir Khalid:

    In my case, it was when the doctors at the University of Malaya Medical Centre started calling me “Uncle”.

    I expect they were trying to be respectful, but ouch.

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