No, not really. But one histrionic, illustrated account of a meaningless personal gesture deserves another, and Will Bunch’s “I burned my Democratic voter registration card today” is a dramatic chipmunk of a post:
[A]s a concerned citizen and a progressive independent voter, I’d love to see an open convention and an honest debate about the future of the Democratic Party here in Philadelphia. I have little doubt that a fair and transparent confab, guided by rank-and-file progressives and not by lobbyists, would cast the money changers from the temple and embrace policies — like health care and college opportunity for all — that are favored by the majority of American voters.I’m not optimistic that will happen, not in the least. So, TTFN, Democratic Party…ta-ta for now. Don’t worry, thanks to Pennsylvania’s closed-primary rule, I have little doubt that I’ll be back again in April 2020…to vote for an honest progressive alternative to President Clinton.
Good riddance, you fucking crybaby. Your preferred candidate couldn’t get enough votes to win the Democratic primary, boo-fucking-hoo. Been there, done that, got the stupid orange hat.
And BTW, that bit about the Democratic Party being “way too corrupt to be a real agent of progressive change”? President Obama is the current head of the Democratic Party, and comparing his progressive accomplishments to Senator Sanders’ is like comparing the mass of the fucking sun to a lentil.
So yeah, nope. You join the snow-white unicorns in the Indy Corral over yonder — we grubby, corrupt Democrats will sack up and take on the Orcs. You’re welcome.
God, I can’t wait until this primary is over. Bunch seems like a good guy and will no doubt go back to being not-stupid soon. But it’s disturbing to see these silly-ass GBCW posts from otherwise sensible people, in the same way it’s disconcerting to learn that someone you previously considered smart and perceptive admired Ayn Rand past puberty.
[H/T: relentless performance art troll srv]
Richard Mayhew
Deaniacs of the world unite!
JSinLA
A truly righteous rant. Well done. I love “boo-fucking-hoo” in virtually any context.
dmsilev
Have you read Sanders’ statement on Nevada yet? It’s a real piece of work, blaming the corrupt establishment, lying about the delegates (most of the 58 delegates who didn’t have an opportunity to be heard didn’t actually show up at the convention, etc.), contained a grand total of one sentence decrying the threats and violence which was immediately followed with the word ‘But’. Etc.
Congratulations, Senator Sanders. You’ve managed to descend below the levels of Clinton Death Throes 2008.
Yutsano
And THAT’S when I needed the cigarette.
nutella
I expect he’ll show up at the convention anyway (for the drama) and then be REALLY, REALLY pissed off when they won’t let him participate in anything since he’s not a Democrat any more.
Mudge
Have always liked Bunch. He will now, of course, work like hell to try to implement the changes he wishes had happened. And a pony.
burnspbesq
Can’t deal with this today. I just want to mourn.
RIP, Guy Clark.
piratedan
well… when you consider the scandal plagued administration foibles of the last 8 years you can pretty much consider Mr. Bunch to be lacking a unicorn in his backyard full of four leaf clovers….
LAO
How have I never clicked on the dramatic chipmunk clip before? It makes me wonder what else I’ve missed.
Emma
In the words of the old cliche, assumes facts not in evidence. I think we’re seeing them as they are at the core. Ain’t pretty but it’s reality.
rikyrah
@Richard Mayhew:
you are too funny :)
geg6
@Yutsano:
Heh. Seriously.
Poopyman
You didn’t quote the part where he laments being in a party “led by Debbie Wasserman Shultz”. Apparently, 54 days is too short a time to figure out who heads the fucking party.
Oh, and I’m not hopeful that by “I’ll be back again in April 2020…to vote for an honest progressive alternative to President Clinton”, he means as opposed to Sanders, a dishonest progressive alternative to Clinton.
burnspbesq
@dmsilev:
Ridiculous. Fuck him, the horse he rode in on, the farrier who shod the horse, and the farmers who grew the hay and oats.
Chyron HR
You life-long Democrats just don’t understand how it feels to support a candidate who loses an election.
Poopyman
@nutella: It’ll all be for show, since he’s already running as an Independent in the 2018 Senate race.
Poopyman
@Chyron HR: [Golf clap]
Betty Cracker
@burnspbesq:
LOL! That’s a keeper.
Richard Mayhew
@rikyrah: hey I still have my amazingly orange hat in my closet
scav
Is the odor of burning party IDs especially sweet when censed in the nostrils of Saunders Idols?
dmsilev
@burnspbesq: What about the miners that mined the iron ore and the smelters who cast the bar stock that became the horse shoes? Do they get fucked as well?
Just for the sake of completeness.
Schlemazel Khan
@Chyron HR:
THANK YOU! Best laugh I have had in a long time!
WarMunchkin
I don’t want the party to spend even one iota of energy trying to recapture the votes of these teahadists. It’s far easier to aggressively register new voters than it is to pander to someone who is so emotional that he or she will withdraw their vote at the slightest disagreement with their ideological allies.
There’s no cost anymore for leading Democrats to aggressively and publicly speak out against Sanders and his supporters, and they should.
dmsilev
@nutella:
Do you mean Will Bunch or Bernie Sanders?
nutella
@Poopyman:
No, it’s Will Bunch who’s burning his
draft cardDemocrat card, not Bernie.Alex.S
Gotta admit, I’m a bit surprised that Barney Frank has turned into an enemy of liberals everywhere.
Schlemazel Khan
@dmsilev:
YES!
and don’t forget the ones that made the nails, and those that cleared the land he rode in on and the assholes that ‘discovered’ the continent the horse grew up on
Schlemazel Khan
@dmsilev:
works for either one really
burnspbesq
@dmsilev:
Them too. The entire god-damn supply chain.
Trollhattan
@Yutsano:
Yup, that put the rebar through the windshield.
Iowa Old Lady
@Chyron HR: Hee. I’ve been voting since 1968. The only winning presidential votes I’ve cast are for Carter, Clinton, and Obama.
Also how come the losing candidate gets to flounce around and demand his feelings and those of his supporters be soothed?
Also too, I love the way Trump is so pleased with his “Crooked Hillary” label. The way he repeats it tells you he thinks it scores big, when the only people who buy it are the ones who would never vote for Clinton anyway.
Cacti
Everything Barney Frank ever said about Bernie was dead on.
The reason he didn’t get colleague endorsements isn’t because he’s anti-establishment. It’s because those who work with him closely know that he’s an asshole.
Poopyman
@nutella: I thought the “he” in your original comment was Sanders, since the statement works equally well with him.
Litlebritdifrnt
Cole is on a twitter tear against the Bernie bros in his timeline at the moment. It is a thing of beauty.
Miss Bianca
@LAO: IKR? Have you seen screaming marmot yet?
Mike J
I think you’re being unfair. He gave the Democrats FIFTY FOUR DAYS to give in to his demands. How long is he expected to wait?
kindness
Thankfully the shrill level has abated some. I still get the frantic appeals (with made up stats and numbers) from ‘friends’ on FB but I don’t see them plastered in every comments section (HuffPo & RawStory excepted). So that is a good thing. Even my BernieBro friends have started to accept reality (most of them at least) and say they will vote for Hillary if she wins.
Really, that’s all I expect from Bernie. To tell his followers to vote for the Democratic candidate. I’m not sure he will though.
lethargytartare
@JSinLA:
hardcore punk, anyone?
Miss Bianca
@Chyron HR: @burnspbesq: Have I mentioned lately that I love you people? Seriously. Thank you for the laffs.
Hungry Joe
Speaking as a Bernie guy who will certainly, even happily, vote and work for Hillary in the general — and who does not tolerate Hillary bashing — I want to tell you that most my fellow Bernie Bros and Sis(ses?) feel the same way. Bernie is closer to the fringe, leftwardly speaking, so it shouldn’t be much of a surprise that his fringe is unhinged. They’re a minority of the minority — Hilz is clearly winning, fair and square — but still, there’s a fair number of them. I just ask that you don’t paint us Bernistas with such a broad brush because, if nothing else, it hurts my fees. Both of them.
AnotherBruce
@LAO: You might be the only person not to have seen Dramatic Chipmunk until today. Hell, it’s about 30% of the internet.
Kylroy
Busting out Jon Stewart’s line to Rs when Obama was elected: “I think you’re confusing tyranny with losing.”
AliceBlue
@dmsilev:
I’m thinking (hoping) that Bernie may have jumped the shark with the antics in Nevada and his statement. According to a diary by Charles Gaba at DKos, one of Bernie’s super delegates has switched over to Hillary. It wasn’t due to what happened in Nevada, but that shitshow might cause some others to think twice.
Dan
If Clinton wins, who will buy his Bernie book?
Frankensteinbeck
My twitter feed is showing up posts on how to fight back against Hillary’s inevitable attempts to suppress Sanders voters in Kentucky.
gex
In one thread yesterday a frequent commenter who supports Bernie had the gall to suggest that the Obamas, as black people, are actually lucky because they knew up front that they can never get away with a fuck up like Burlington College. See, isn’t the crippling racist double standard actually a net plus for black folk? Aren’t they LUCKY?
I guess the self-important white entitlement that makes someone think I give a fuck about their voter registration tantrum reminded me of that.
dmsilev
@AliceBlue: I can’t see how he’s going to attract more super delegates with this “strategy”, and that was the only possible avenue to the nomination he has left. It’s getting ugly, and also a bit sad, to watch him and his campaign flop around like a freshly-landed fish.
dmsilev
@Frankensteinbeck: Don’t the polls close in KY in like 2 hours or so? Seems a bit late to be fighting back against (presumably imaginary) voting suppression.
JSinLA
@lethargytartare: Thanks for the link. Was unfamiliar with that particular tune, but it is awesome.
nutella
@gex:
Lucky duckies, those black people, never tempted into incompetence like us poor, beleaguered white folks.
Miss Bianca
@AnotherBruce: No, me too. I was a Dramatic Chipmunk Virgin till today.
David ?Canadian Anchor Baby? Koch
Who?
Frankensteinbeck
@dmsilev:
The original tweets are five hours old, they were just retweeted within the last hour by a Sanders fan I am friends with.
themann1086
That’s weird, I don’t remember seeing Mr. Bunch at any of the Delaware County Democratic Committee meetings. Granted, I don’t go to all of them, and maybe he’s like me, primarily focused on electing Democrats in his township. I’m sure that’s it.
Betty Cracker
@Hungry Joe: #NotAllBernBros — I know it! My dear husband is a BernFeeler who has arrived at acceptance and will vote for Hillz this November. I seriously considered voting for Sanders myself but ultimately decided on Clinton. I still hope things wrap up peaceably like they did in aught-eight.
Matt McIrvin
@Iowa Old Lady:
It is scoring big. Have you seen the polls? Trump’s numbers are barely budging but Hillary’s are going down. She’s going to have higher negatives than Trump in a few weeks.
And Bernie is helping.
gwangung
Yeah, I’m pretty sure that the vast majority of Sanders supporters are reasonable people—after all, there’s a great deal of overlap in the voting behavior of the two.
I’m a little sad that folks were slow to identify exactly who was doing the more egregious behavior (i.e. a tiny sliver of apparently Paulites); it would have helped me to process if I knew where their reprehensible behavior was coming from. But I think everyone reasonable rejects asshole behavior….
LAO
@Miss Bianca: Now, I have. Thank you.
Frankensteinbeck
@Hungry Joe:
Thank you, by the way! I know the vast majority of Sanders voters are just perfectly sane liberals who like his more aggressive message more. The lunatics are the fringe. What’s upsetting me now is that Sanders himself is actively encouraging and defending the worst fringe.
Betty Cracker
@Richard Mayhew: I had to wrap mine in a black hefty bag and enclose it in a locked trunk — it shone too brightly to allow sleep!
LAO
@AnotherBruce: Trust me, I feel like a moron.
the Conster, la Citoyenne
Gee, who would you rather go to war against Trump’s orc army with – a bunch of Berniebro douchecanoes who don’t like dirty hands and will only fight against girls, or the Obama coalition? Hmmmmmmmmm…….
Richard Mayhew
@Betty Cracker: mine is my mid-storm snow shoveling hat
the Conster, la Citoyenne
@gex: that was our very own sparkle pony, Applejinx.
Emma
If I hear one more thing about a poll I shall scream. Polls are, in general, a complete joke, and at this stage even more so. Most polls are designed to get the answers the pollsters want; hell it was one of the things my stats professor showed us how to do back in the 1970s. Right now everyone is commissioning polls because they need something to throw around to actually sound knowledgeable.
Hungry Joe
“Suppressing the Bernie vote” in a primary isn’t like suppressing the Democratic vote in the general, where you can simply target minority/heavily Democratic neighborhoods. The very notion of “suppressing the Bernie vote” makes no sense whatsoever. How would you go about doing that — ask someone in line who he plans to vote for and if he says “Bernie,” bonk him on the head, throw a gunny sack over him, and toss him onto a ship, where he’ll wake up fifty miles out to sea and have to sign on as a common seaman to earn his way home in a year or two? Oh, sure, that’d work a few times, but …
What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?
Health care and college opportunity for all. Show me anyone in the Democratic party that is against these things. Oh, you can’t? So it’s all about process and tone and not at all about different end goals? Well, so sorry you feel you’re unwilling to compromise on process and tone to support someone who is looking to accomplish the actual goals you have for the direction of this country. That’s totally a tragedy man.
What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?
@Iowa Old Lady: That was a beaut.
Joel
@Matt McIrvin: Not exactly. And you can expect a bounce once the nomination is officially secured. I wouldn’t worry too much unless Sanders decides to actively fight through the convention. If this happens, you will see retribution against Sanders and many of the policies that he supports (this is the worst case scenario, IMHO).
Mnemosyne
Up until 2002, I was registered as “decline to state” (which is CA terminology for “independent”). But the utter fucking disaster of the 2000 election made me rethink my “I can be above it all” stance and realize that I was being a fucking idiot.
As a certain Pulitzer Prize winner has put it:
I want to win, and you don’t win by never picking a team. If you stand for nothing, what will you fall for?
FlyingToaster
@Hungry Joe:
From Kentucky??? I don’t think anyone has the money to ship comatose ‘bros a thousand miles to the nearest port.
WaterGirl
@LAO: I never clicked until I read your comment. Awesome!
And somehow I was reminded of another video. This seems most appropriate to the subject of this post.. P.S. I heart Beaker.
lethargytartare
@JSinLA:
this election season has pushed me to open up the back catalog and crank up some of the angriest tunes I can find. Instantly thought of this when I read Betty’s post. :)
Cacti
Compare what Nevada legislator and Sanders surrogate Lucy Flores had this to say about the torrent of misogyny unleashed at Barbara Boxer and Roberta Lange, to Bernie’s mealy-mouthed condemnation:
Hmmm…now what’s the difference between Flores and Sanders that one would find sex-based insults of fellow Dems repellant, and the other wouldn’t think they even warrant a mention?
smith
@FlyingToaster:
I’d kick in if it earned us some peace and quiet.
lethargytartare
@Hungry Joe:
now that you mention it…
Iowa Old Lady
@Cacti: Flores impressed me by her ability and willingness to separate the things she still objects to in the process from the behavior of the Sanders delegates. If you’ve read at Kos (which, god help me, I did), you see that a lot of Sanders supporters dismiss the aggressive behavior because the delegates were upset by the process. Flores doesn’t do that. My hat’s off to her.
Mnemosyne
@Cacti:
As burnsesq pointed out last night, booing a popular California senator three weeks before you want California to vote for your candidate was a stupid, stupid thing to do.
If Bernie was hoping to win California, I hope he realizes that he’s shot himself in the foot by not denouncing his supporters’ behavior.
lollipopguild
@FlyingToaster: When I voted this morning(Satan in a pants suit) there were No lines.
Cacti
@Mnemosyne:
Barbara Boxer is a national treasure, and not someone easily intimidated.
Up to now, she was simply a Clinton supporter. After having the Berners shout “bitch!” at her in Nevada, and Bernie shrug it off, I would guess she’s going to pull every string she can to make sure Bern loses the golden state by the widest possible margin.
Miss Bianca
@WaterGirl: that is a thing of beauty and a joy forever.
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
@burnspbesq That’s two of us. I knew it was coming – I’ve been hearing Desperadoes Waiting for a Train in my head for the last 10 days, and singing it to Layla on our walks or weeding trips. I had a feeling it might be because “that son of a bitch is coming.”
The Texas Music Office announce the sad news on twitter. The photo was the famous one of Guy, Susanna, Townes and Daniel on the porch of Guy and Susanna’s house. Which in those days, was pretty much TVZ’s house too.
Mnemosyne
@Hungry Joe:
FWIW, I think the vast majority of commenters here realize that Berniebros are a noisy subset of Bernie supporters, not the majority. They’re the 2016 edition of PUMAs.
Major Major Major Major
@FlyingToaster: Hillary has the money. All those Goldman speeches.
Mike J
@Hungry Joe:
And you wonder why I spend so much time sailing? It’s a small boat, we can’t take many out.
AxelFoley
@Yutsano:
You, too?
JSinLA
@lethargytartare: when I get fired up I generally want something like Scatterbrain by Jeff Beck. Somehow he speaks to whatever discontent I may have at the moment.
Scatterbrain
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
@LAO: Night time/Daytime! and Alan, Alan, Alan + some more.
Gareth is my favorite. I called a naturalist who had to research his variety – so I felt better about not recognizing an African Black Heron at first sighting.
scott (the other one)
You know, I probably agree with more of Bernie’s positions than I do Clinton’s. But after watching all this, and knowing how few endorsements he picked up from his colleagues, I wonder if the comparison isn’t between Bernie and Trump, but Bernie and Cruz. Sure, Bernie’s successes have been much more like Trump’s, in terms of apparently reaching disenfranchised voters. But in terms of temperaments, he’s starting to seem more like Ted Cruz: so rigidly devout that who cares if he never actually achieves anything, as long as he stays pure and unsullied. And disliked.
Obviously, this analogy doesn’t really hold up, since unlike Cruz, Sanders comes off as pretty likable and not reprehensible. And unlike Cruz he’s not an inhuman monster. But still.
Major Major Major Major
@scott (the other one):
Not according to anybody who’s had to work with him, ever.
LAO
@a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q): lol. This afternoon has been a real learning experience.
Iowa Old Lady
My Freedom Caucus House member objected to a Dubuque report who was “looking at him funny.”
We are almost certain to be rid of Blum after November (my district is consistently Democratic) but this is embarrassing.
Jerzy Russian
@dmsilev:
What about that massive star that went supernova that dispersed all that iron into the interstellar medium, some of which ended up in the Earth? I think we should just include the entire universe in that list of fuck recipients.
Elie
Betty — Late to the thread but appreciate your righteous rant. Did you guys hear about Bernie’s statement in response to the NV behavior of his followers? While “it goes without saying” that he is against violence, “his people need to be respected” Yeah — is it before or after they make death threats to the head of the NV Democratic Party? No apology! I knew that he was an asshole but this seals it… how embarrassing for his many serious advocates who do not deserve his contemptuous response. So many Democrats voted for him in good faith thinking he was the real deal. He is a fraud — without honor or dignity. As I have said previously, the one thing that our long and arduous campaign season gives us is an opportunity to really see the character of the people running for the most important office in this country and maybe the world…. We see you Bernie — we see…
Ella inNew Mexico
@Betty Cracker and @Miss Bianca: Lololol!
“Dramatic Chipmunk” and “Screaming Marmot” are our #1 & 2 go-to, HIPPA compliant, post- “shift from hell” FB statuses me and my nurse co-worker buds tag each other with. We don’t even have to comment, just the video and tags are all we need.
Last time it was three of us in a sub- section of ICU called the Step-Down unit, with no CNA and us having to deal with a code, a patient who wouldn’t leave his clothes on and kept trying to get out of bed, perpetually ringing call lights for cups of ice or to figure out “how to call my wife on this thing”, and doctors who couldn’t find their asses with their own two hands when it came to putting orders in the computer. All at basically same time. Marmot just feels so right after one of those days.
Chipmunk’s better for freak-you-out shit, like you get report from the ED that your next patient is having a massive GI bleed because he put a garden hose up his butt and perfed his colon. ;-)
Jack Hughes
At some point children understand they can’t keep a pony in the back yard. They accept reality.
For some reason Sanders’ supporters just can’t — or won’t — accept the fact that their guy is getting less votes than Clinton.
Their reaction to this fact is like the child who can’t have a pony setting their family’s house on fire in protest.
YellowDog
“Not progressive enough” is the mirror image of “not conservative enough”.
J R in WV
@Matt McIrvin:
So, you are a racist, anti-muslim, know-nothing (look it up) hater, planning to vote for Don Trump instead of an experienced, well-educated, former Secretary of State, former Senator?
Really?
Fuck you for being an asshole!
Richard Mayhew
@Ella inNew Mexico: today was a marmot date then
Miss Bianca
@Ella inNew Mexico: OMG. (Imagine my Dramatic Chipmunk face now).
I used to work at a Planned Parenthood clinic, and we got the occasional case of weirdness like that. I remember one time when a woman came in and was very, very reluctant to tell us what the problem was. Turned out she’d got one of those Russian nesting dolls stuck up in her hoo-ha. The HCA who did her intake was so flummoxed upon hearing what had happened that she wrote it down verbatim (altho’ I believe she used the proper technical term for “hoo-ha”). The nurse practitioner who took the file came storming out of the exam room and confronted my colleague and said sternly, “Next time, just use the term ‘foreign object insertion'” before returning to the case in hand.
MikeBoyScout
“So yeah, nope. You join the snow-white unicorns in the Indy Corral over yonder — we grubby, corrupt Democrats will sack up and take on the Orcs. You’re welcome.”
Best writing of the year. :-)))))
akryan
@Mnemosyne: I don’t think they’re like the PUMA’s. The PUMA’s were bitter and took awhile to lick their wounds, but you never saw anything like you do out of some of the Sanders supporters. I think these guys include a lot of a Paul supporters that crossed over for this election. I know several guys that fit that description. They’re pretty wild-eyed. They got 80% of the vote up here in AK but bat shit crazy is going to be bat shit crazy about something. So they went bat shit at our convention over the minutia of the state party platform. I can only imagine how they’d be at a state convention after a pretty close vote.
Austin Loomis
Prairie dog, dammit. It’s a dramatic prairie dog. In the full clip, you can even hear the Morning Musume girls saying “Aa, pureirii doggu!”