Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

If senate republicans had any shame, they’d die of it.

“I never thought they’d lock HIM up,” sobbed a distraught member of the Lock Her Up Party.

Take your GOP plan out of the witness protection program.

A democracy can’t function when people can’t distinguish facts from lies.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

Our job is not to persuade republicans but to defeat them.

Republicans don’t want a speaker to lead them; they want a hostage.

Putin dreamed of ending NATO, and now it’s Finnish-ed.

We cannot abandon the truth and remain a free nation.

Insiders who complain to politico: please report to the white house office of shut the fuck up.

Accountability, motherfuckers.

I didn’t have alien invasion on my 2023 BINGO card.

We’ll be taking my thoughts and prayers to the ballot box.

It’s easy to sit in safety and prescribe what other people should be doing.

Putin must be throwing ketchup at the walls.

They fucked up the fucking up of the fuckup!

Give the craziest people you know everything they want and hope they don’t ask for more? Great plan.

Jack Smith: “Why did you start campaigning in the middle of my investigation?!”

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

“woke” is the new caravan.

Jesus, Mary, & Joseph how is that election even close?

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires

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Reader Interactions

27Comments

  1. 1.

    Yutsano

    CHEE!

    Sorry to be quiet for a fair tick. I’ve been at a convention celebrating candy coloured equines. Just to leak my semi-secret location, I’m in Kansas City Missouri. I’m sorry for no notice in advance but there was no real time for a meet-up. I will be in Seattle some time next month however!

  2. 2.

    Hungry Joe

    How to make chicken broth, and yet not HAVE chicken broth: 1) Make chicken broth. 2) Allow to cool. 3) Place colander in sink. 4) Do not put container under colander. 5) Pour liquid contents of pot through colander and down the drain.

    Yes, I did. A couple of hours ago. Have rent clothes, smeared ashes, smote (smitten?) forehead.

  14. 14.

    Elizabelle

    @efgoldman: I bet that was a good day. First carousel ride, and the grands will remember it even more than the young’un.

    Good morning all.

    http://www.motherjones.com/kevin-drum/2016/05/hillary-clinton-has-shouting-problem

    Gotta get ready for school, but read a bit of Kevin Drum’s article and agree with many of the Drum reader comments: Hillary Clinton rocks, but it would be in her advantage to improve her speaking style. They’ve suggested a voice coach, a better sound man.

    It’s not trivial. Yes, she’s being judged by a double standard. Neither Sanders nor Trump are polished orators.

    But there is something grating about her shout-speaking, and she’s got an uphill climb with some voters who have been bathing in rightwing trash-perception placing about her (which has been a cottage industry for years). She comes across so much more favorably in town halls and interviews and one on one.

    How could it hurt to work on her voice? Maybe she would even learn to save it; she’s in a marathon. And could there be a technical solution; better miking and sound control, so she can use a lower tone, closer to her regular speaking voice? Because the shout-speaking is strident and, again, double standard.

    My two cents. Suspect you all discussed this but good, since JCole tweeted comment on Drum article. (He disagrees.)

  15. 15.

    seaboogie

    I’m in a blissed out food coma right now. Was doing a cat-sit visit for a friend and she left me a half gallon of premium fresh olive oil which she milled, and a bottle of wine.

    I’ve yet to meet the cat in question that I am sitting, but steamed some new red potatoes, broke them open with a fork and drizzled plenty of the green olive oil over them. Added a grating of mixed peppercorns, a bit of salt and a dusting of romano cheese. Mmmffff…… Then I opened the wine. Good Lord! It’s like crawling up a verdant, loamy hill with your mouth.

    I am going to offer to sit this imaginary creature more often.

  16. 16.

    sigaba

    Cheetahs are the fastest land animal but they can’t sustain their max speed for more than a few hundred yards.

    Human beings are easily the best endurance runners in the animal kingdom. African tribes hunt cheetahs by chasing them at normal human running speeds, and running after them for 4-6 hours. At that point the cheetah is utterly exhausted, and the pursuers can walk up to them and club them to death.

  17. 17.

    seaboogie

    @Elizabelle: Yes, she’s being judged by a double standard. Neither Sanders nor Trump are polished orators.

    This is misogyny and/or sexism in a nutshell – even by one of our fair sex. Let Hillary get as shouty as she fucking wants! Perhaps you and others want her to be a more perfect projection of the first possible female President, but I think Hillary has put up with just enough shit, having been targeted for more than 20 years – and am happy for her to shout away. It’s cool when Bernie is doing it, n’est-ce pas? Quit projecting your magical unicorn of perfection on her and embrace that shouty old woman – she has more stones than any of the fellas in this campaign!

  18. 18.

    I'mNotSureWhoIWantToBeYet

    @seaboogie: Unless I’m mis-remembering, GHWB supposedly ended up taking some speech lessons at some point. He was often criticized for having a whiny voice.

    I used to find Hillary’s voice grating, but it doesn’t bother me much any more. It’s probably just me. Or maybe there are more important things to be annoyed about now. ;-)

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  19. 19.

    seaboogie

    @Elizabelle:

    Gotta get ready for school, but read a bit of Kevin Drum’s article and agree with many of the Drum reader comments: Hillary Clinton rocks, but it would be in her advantage to improve her speaking style. They’ve suggested a voice coach, a better sound man.

    So when you go to school tomorrow, we are going to need you to modulate your voice a bit, make it supportive and kind, but strong enough to be empowering to the children, and not threatening in any way. Yes, you are going to have to speak for up to 8 hours a day, and we will be monitoring every syllable, so please do not misstep, else we will of course comment on that.

    Imagine your every utterance being scrutinized and criticized, while your male peers spout nonsense in a Brooklyn accent and fap their balls. Welcome to Hillary’s world.

  20. 20.

    seaboogie

    @I’mNotSureWhoIWantToBeYet: Hey Scott….

    Fellow women getting on Hillary’s case about decorum and such is just one step too fucking far for me. It’s like they are telling her which gloves to wear to appear proper, and the right sized heel for her shoes. And Bernie and Trump work at destroying their parties in their narcissistic pursuits. But yes, Hillary must modulate her voice. Fuck that noise!

  21. 21.

    Juju

    I agree completely with you, Seaboogie. I think Hillary is great and her shouty is music to my ears compared to either of the thin skinned old farts. One is like having grandpa Simpson yell at you, the other is like having that guy who thinks he’s dog’s gift to women try to be all snarky and yelly after you tell him to piss off, or maybe it’s just me, and they’re not that irritating. If Hillary did get voice lessons of some sort, I’m sure she’d be criticized for that as well.

  23. 23.

    PurpleGirl

    @seaboogie: The hoomin food treat sounds yummy.

    To the cat, you are just a tall/big, pink, hairless critter. Until s/he knows you it will probably keep hiding from you.

  24. 24.

    Amir Khalid

    Hillary’s operating in an environment where people are hypercritical about even her trivial faults. To judge by the video clips I’ve seen, there isn’t much wrong with how she presents herself. I’d rather listen to her speaking voice than to either Donald’s or Bernie’s. And I agree that any perceived shoutiness in her speaking voice is a very trivial fault compared to her great advantage in presidential substance. That said, if her camp feels that the shoutiness should be addressed by a voice coach, I see no harm in doing that.

  25. 25.

    BillinGlendaleCA

    @Amir Khalid: A friend of ours took us out for dinner, madame and the kid both will vote for HRC but they’re not enthusiastic. Both have problems with her truthfulness. The kid’s questions concern the email stuff, not sure about the wife’s concerns(I think it may have to a general Clinton hangover).

    ETA: Our friend is a rethug, and usually refers to HRC as a word that rhymes with witch. Other than that he’s a good guy.

  26. 26.

    The Lodger

    @Elizabelle: I agree. Occasionally I hear her and I think her vocal cords won’t survive the campaign. It’s only with big crowds though.

  27. 27.

    Miss Bianca

    I agree wholeheartedly that HRC is being held to a double standard. I am sick to death of the way the sound of women’s voices get criticized – from “shoutiness” or “screechiness” to the whole “vocal fry” nonsense – it’s really just a way of telling women to shut up, period. And it’s not a new thing – it’s gone on for hundreds of years. I’m doing “King Lear” now, and I find myself wincing in the middle of Lear’s last lamentation over the dead Cordelia: “her voice was ever soft, gentle, and low/an excellent thing in a woman.” This from a character who’s just spent the last two hours raging and storming on stage (over how his *other* daughters failed to meet his standards).

    As a performer, on the other hand, I find myself saying, “a little vocal training never hurts”. Not to change the timbre of your voice to suit my standards, but to prevent the voice from damage.

    Great. Does “so in a way, you both have a point!” put me one step away from “both sides do it”?

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