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You are here: Home / Sports / Euro 2016 Group B Final Game

Euro 2016 Group B Final Game

by Randinho|  June 20, 20162:57 pm| 48 Comments

This post is in: Sports

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One thread for England v Slovakia and Russia v Wales.

Russia must win as they have only one point and every other team has at least three. Slovakia and Wales have identical records, including goal differential. If they both manage to win, then they will both go through, with England being in good shape for third place qualifier spot.

If England wins, they win the group. That much is certain.

Posted from a moving city bus.

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Reader Interactions

48Comments

  1. 1.

    raven

    June 20, 2016 at 3:01 pm

    Where’s them down in the mouth Limeys?

  2. 2.

    Scamp Dog

    June 20, 2016 at 3:02 pm

    I’ve forgotten–what city are you in?

  3. 3.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 3:13 pm

    Nice to see England attacking from the off, with The midfield swarming forward every chance they get to back up the two forwards. Slovakia are just about coping with the pressure so far, but it only takes one mistake and Sturridge or Vardy are going to be in.

    And Wales go one up in their game! It’s a good night!

  4. 4.

    randy khan

    June 20, 2016 at 3:18 pm

    Also, England goes through with a tie or a win by Russia, and wins the group if both games are ties.

  5. 5.

    Punchy

    June 20, 2016 at 3:22 pm

    @Tony J: 2 up. Looks like those pinko commies have quit.

    Wolverine!

  6. 6.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 3:22 pm

    That’s one he’ll of a bloody nose he’s got there. How many pints can you lose before you start feeling dizzy?

  7. 7.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 3:27 pm

    It’s Maskirovka! They’re luring the Welsh into feeling relaxed, then they’ll pounce like Wolves of the Taiga.

  8. 8.

    ? Martin

    June 20, 2016 at 3:27 pm

    @Tony J:

    And Wales go one up in their game! It’s a good night!

    Careful what you wish for. There’ll be Russian bomber overflights of Cardiff by the 2nd half.

  9. 9.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 3:30 pm

    @Punchy:

    Maskirovka! Portland Bob told me they’re maintaining a non-aggressive posture while they wait for the CIA assets in the Welsh squad to expose themselves.

  10. 10.

    Roger Moore

    June 20, 2016 at 3:30 pm

    @Tony J:

    How many pints can you lose before you start feeling dizzy?

    Depends on who you are and how good shape you’re in to start with. One pint is the standard amount to give when donating blood, and most people don’t feel dizzy afterward. I would expect an elite athlete to be in good enough shape not to be dizzy from losing a pint, though it might affect their endurance.

  11. 11.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 3:33 pm

    @? Martin:

    Bad Vlad will pull the plug on Wales’ energy supply any second now. It’ll be lights out and no TV for you, Comrade Taffy.

  12. 12.

    Amir Khalid

    June 20, 2016 at 3:35 pm

    If the Russians go out in the group stage, at least they’ll no longer be at risk of disqualification.

  13. 13.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 3:35 pm

    @Roger Moore:

    His top looked like a prop from Dexter when he went off. Seems okay now though. Still, it was a wicked (but accidental) elbow Bertrand caught him with.

  14. 14.

    Face

    June 20, 2016 at 3:37 pm

    What does Wales need to advance? Do they need goal differential (read: Can we expect a 0-7 Wales trouncing?)?

  15. 15.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 3:39 pm

    @Amir Khalid:

    The 2018 World Cup in Russia is gearing up to be as much of a clusterfeck as the GOP Convention, only with even more homophobia and risk of organised violence.

  16. 16.

    Calouste

    June 20, 2016 at 3:42 pm

    @Face: The first tie breaker is the result(s) between the tied teams. If Wales beats Russia, as Wales beat Slovakia earlier, they will always be ahead of them in the group, and Wales and England can’t finish on the same number of points.

    tl;dr: If Wales wins, the score doesn’t matter for their ranking.

  17. 17.

    Amir Khalid

    June 20, 2016 at 3:42 pm

    @Face:
    Wales need to finish in the top two. A draw with Russia would have sufficed. As things stand, though, they’re top of the table in group B.

  18. 18.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 3:44 pm

    @Face:

    They currently (if it stays like this) top the group with 6 points. The only way they fail to progress is if Russia come roaring back with a lot of goals, England win to top the group and other 3rd place teams end up with superior goal differences.

    Not likely, I’d say they’re through.

  19. 19.

    Runt

    June 20, 2016 at 3:45 pm

    I’d love to know which FIFA genius decided that referees must now hold a conference with one player from each team to explain the rules regarding holding before EVERY GODDAM corner or freecick outside the penalty box. If you see holding, just let play commence and give a penalty or a freekick, dammit!

  20. 20.

    Calouste

    June 20, 2016 at 3:46 pm

    @Tony J: FIFA/UEFA are terribly hoping there will be no violence tonight, because it will be problematic to keep the World Cup in a country that would have been kicked out of the previous major tournament. And they don’t want to get caught between public opinion and the wrath of Vlad.

  21. 21.

    humboldtblue

    June 20, 2016 at 3:46 pm

    Well, Liverpool had a solid first half just couldn’t get the break through goal.

  22. 22.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 3:56 pm

    England have made all the running but haven’t found a route all the way through the Slovak defense. Far too many passes not quite coming off, balls played up and over instead of fast and on the floor, and players not being where the final ball is delivered.

    Wiltshire hasn’t really found a way to work his magic in midfield, Sturridge is doing that thing he sometime does where he drifts around and isn’t really effective, Henderson is willing but seems to have his shoes on the wrong feet when crossing or taking set-pieces. Not enough quality in the last third.

    One of those games where you expect that the weight of pressure will tell in the end but you won’t have any fingernails left when that comes.

  23. 23.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 3:58 pm

    @humboldtblue:

    Story of our season, mate. 8-)

  24. 24.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 4:02 pm

    @Calouste:

    From what’s been reported the Russian hooligan contingent think they’re laying a marker for the Great Patriotic Street-War of 2018 at this tournament. Hard to see them responding to such a resounding defeat and humiliating dumping out with anything other than a last display of Russian “manly pride”.

  25. 25.

    Calouste

    June 20, 2016 at 4:08 pm

    @Tony J: Yeah, I expect there will be riots in the stands.

    Of course there is also the issue of holding the World Cup in a country that looks like it will have all its athletes banned from the Rio Olympics because of state-organized doping (not just track and field, who are already banned).

  26. 26.

    Randinho

    June 20, 2016 at 4:10 pm

    @Scamp Dog: Vitória, Espírito Santo Brazil

  27. 27.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 4:12 pm

    Christ Akimbo that could have been a really stupid goal to concede.

    Clyde is doing sterling work on that right flank, but changes have to be made elsewhere. And yeah, there goes Wiltshire, just not his night tonight. Let’s see how Shrek manages.

  28. 28.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 4:14 pm

    @Calouste:

    I know. The decision to give Russia the 2018 World Cup looks more and more like a ticking time-bomb for UEFA. Some really nasty shit is almost certain to go down there.

  29. 29.

    Gin & Tonic

    June 20, 2016 at 4:16 pm

    @Calouste: The IAAF action is not binding on the IOC. Dollars to donuts the IOC allows them to compete. The IOC will *not* have FIFA known as the world’s most corrupt sporting body.

  30. 30.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 4:16 pm

    Deli Ali for Lallana? Odd, he’s been really good tonight.

  31. 31.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 4:18 pm

    Aarrrrggghhh! Damn you Skrtel! That would have been a hell of an intro for Deli Ali.

  32. 32.

    Steeplejack (phone)

    June 20, 2016 at 4:26 pm

    Wales up 3-0 now.

  33. 33.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 4:26 pm

    Wales 3-0 up. Come on England, find another gear.

  34. 34.

    Dork

    June 20, 2016 at 4:30 pm

    @Calouste: Perhaps all that filthy lucre will soothe their pain.

    Seriously, fuck FIFA. Worried about a Russian games? Where was that worry when their under-the-table hands were overflowing with millions of rubles?

  35. 35.

    Steeplejack (phone)

    June 20, 2016 at 4:33 pm

    Grab some pine, Sturridge.

  36. 36.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 4:38 pm

    @Dork:

    Quite possibly they’re worried that a real disaster in two years time will lead to ass-covering investigations into how the decision to give Russia the tournament was made in the first place. It takes all the fun out of bribery if you’re going to get punished and/or disgraced for it some day.

  37. 37.

    SRW1

    June 20, 2016 at 4:43 pm

    @Tony J:
    @Dork:
    @Tony J:

    Russia 2018 is only gonna be a prelude for the real cluster fuck: Qatar 2022.

  38. 38.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 4:46 pm

    Skrtel’s been so immense for Slovakia in this game that his groin has exploded. That’s dedication.

  39. 39.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 4:48 pm

    @SRW1:

    The tournament so ridiculously hot fans will riot riot just so they can get water-cannoned.

  40. 40.

    Randinho

    June 20, 2016 at 4:48 pm

    @SRW1: Word.

  41. 41.

    Aldo

    June 20, 2016 at 4:51 pm

    I finally jumped on the “this is England’s year” bandwagon. Why couldn’t I learn from the millions of those that came before me?

  42. 42.

    SRW1

    June 20, 2016 at 4:52 pm

    That might mean a doable opponent for England in the next round, but then likely France in the quarterfinal.

  43. 43.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 4:54 pm

    Rooney has done totally shit all since he came on. Lost the ball and run into tackles, that’s it. The whole team, apart from Clyne, has seemed to be playing in a lower gear. So much possession and pressure but with zero end result.

    So now we wait to see who we play from Group F. Hungary, Iceland, Austria or Portugal.

    Iceland or Portugal please.

    And congrats to Wales. Had a job to do and did it hardcore. Now all it needs is for Northern Ireland to pull off a major upset and Belgium to stuff Poland for Wales to get Germany in the next round.

  44. 44.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 4:57 pm

    @Aldo:

    Dude, surely you were warned?

  45. 45.

    Calouste

    June 20, 2016 at 5:01 pm

    So barring any upsets it looks like England, France, Italy, and Germany will be in the bottom half of the draw, and Spain with a number of second tier nations will be in the top half.

  46. 46.

    Tony J

    June 20, 2016 at 5:20 pm

    @Calouste:

    Yup. And tonight’s result means that England’s route to any final probably goes through games with France, and Germany or Italy, this assuming we get past whoever finishes second in Group F.

    On the plus side, might be nice to play a side that actually comes out and plays. It’s really frustrating trying to hammer through a side that just parks the bus as we have (with mixed success) in the last three games.

    Please, no Italy though. Their defense is like a porous rock sucking the joy out of any game.

  47. 47.

    Origuy

    June 20, 2016 at 5:59 pm

    Mynd Dreigiau!
    A Russian expat friend of mine just posted on Facebook (in Russian): “And this is why Anglo-Saxon fascist executioners quiver before Russia’s might.” He’s not a fan of Putin. Apparently Vladimir Vladimirovich has been blaming the Anglophone nations for Russia’s doping problems.

  48. 48.

    MCA1

    June 20, 2016 at 6:16 pm

    HaHaHa, Mexico!

    Wait, this is a Copa America thread, right?

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