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You are here: Home / Music / Well I’m sitting here playing solitaire

Well I’m sitting here playing solitaire

by | 200 Comments

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The police executions (that’s what they are) and endless idiotic discussion of Hillary’s Watergate-caliber secret email crimes are just too depressing for me today. So I thought maybe a music thread might be in order.

I was stuck on plane for hours recently and thought about playing cards and thought what songs are there that mention playing cards? Here’s a partial list: “Carmelita”, “Desperado”, that awful Juice Newton song from my childhood, “Tumbling Dice”, “City of New Orleans”, some Bob Dylan song with a long title, “Flowers on the Wall”, “The Gambler”. I’d like to include “Stagger Lee” but they’re actually playing craps in that one.

What else? And which one is the best? I’ll go with “Carmelita”.

I’m not sure how to help with his but if anyone is please do. Mary G writes:

I have been an idiot. I took a shower and fell on my ass on the bathroom floor. I didn’t bring a phone in and haven’t set up email on this tablet. I was able to email Betty Cracker through the contact page asking her to call 911 for me, but I don’t have a way to know if she got it. If any other front pagers are around, can you let me know.

Update: 911 has been contacted on Mary G’s behalf.

Reader Interactions

200Comments

  3. 3.

    Miss Bianca

    I said “Me dear lady, if you’re fond of the gaming
    There’s one game I know we would like you to learn
    The game it is called The Game of All Fours”
    So I took out me pack and began the first turn

    “The Game of All Fours” – wanted the Silly Sisters version, but Kate Rusby’s is quite nice:

  8. 8.

    Mnemosyne

    “If Love is a Red Dress” isn’t all about cards, but it has a couple of great card-related verses. My favorite:

    “If love is aces … gimme the Jack.”

  9. 9.

    Ripley

    Deerhoof, Dummy Discards a Heart. A bridge reference as a metaphor for throwing away a loving relationship. From their excellent 2003 album Apple O’ (warning: Pitchfork link, good review but that site is a hipper-than-thou hellhole much of the time).

  10. 10.

    Trollhattan

    Those black cards will make you money
    So you hide them when you’re able
    In the land of milk and honey
    You must leave them on the table

  11. 11.

    Miss Bianca

    And if we’re going with British folk-rock, Fairport Convention’s Jack of Diamonds is a goodie too: “Jack of Diamonds is a hard card to play/but it ain’t hard enough”

  16. 16.

    raven

    Since it costs a lot to win, and even more to lose,
    You and me bound to spend some time wond’rin’ what to choose.
    Goes to show, you don’t ever know,
    Watch each card you play and play it slow,
    Wait until that deal come round,
    Don’t you let that deal go down, no, no.

    I been gamblin’ hereabouts for ten good solid years,
    If I told you all that went down it would burn off both of your ears.
    Goes to show you don’t ever know
    Watch each card you play and play it slow,
    Wait until that deal come round,
    Don’t you let that deal go down, no, no.

  19. 19.

    Hal

    Is there a succinct breakdown somewhere on the great interwebs of the facts, just the facts, of the worst political scandal since Watergate? I feel like I’m missing some basic info here and there and there is so much bloviating going on it’s hard to break it all down.

  20. 20.

    Schlemazel Khan

    @petesh:
    GAAAWWWWD, I worked at a radio station in the 70s and had to hear that turkey about once a week.

    I was going to add it but you beat me to it.

  21. 21.

    Trollhattan

    @efgoldman:
    It makes me worry John Ashcroft might have recorded a song about cards. “Let the Eagle Fly at the Joker” or somesuch.

  24. 24.

    Miss Bianca

    Oh, my Lord, finding that Fairport song has sent me down the Youtube rabbit hole…footage of FC at their last concert with Sandy Denny…Richard Thompson with a mane of wild curly hair, looking all of about 17 (i’m not sure he was much older), Dave Swarbrick young, lithe, healthy and elfin, ever with that cigarette dangling out of his mouth, one of the thousands that killed him…and Sandy herself. Oh, dear…I could get a little sniffly if this keeps up…

  28. 28.

    Spacekakes

    Draw of the cards – Kim Carnes
    The Jack – AC/DC
    but ace of spades is best

  29. 29.

    BGinCHI

    This is an easy one:

    Townes Van Zandt’s “Mr. Mudd and Mr. Gold”

    “Well the wicked king of clubs awoke
    And it was to his queen turned
    His lips were laughing as they spoke
    His eyes like bullets burned…”

  31. 31.

    randy khan

    Seriously, no mention of “The Gambler?” I mean, not that it’s in the running to be greatest song in this category, but still.

  36. 36.

    Gemina13

    I would have said, “I’m Winning,” by Santana, but only one line references cards: “When I played my hand/Looked like a joker.”

    Otherwise, one song I haven’t seen here (probably because it’s drippier than a maple tree in February) is, “Shape of My Heart,” by Sting.

  38. 38.

    misterpuff

    You scorned the love that I gave you
    You lied now nothing can save you
    Blue skies are turning to grey
    I know the games that you play
    Winds of rage they start to build
    Too much madness will lay you under
    The cards you draw don’t help at all
    Hear the sound of approaching thunder

    When you see the clouds blacken
    Remember you’ve been warned
    No shelter from my fierce winds
    Because, I am the storm

    You’ll hear my echoes of anger
    You’ll fear the roar of my thunder
    Nightmares, confusion will come true
    Aces and eights are the fate that you drew
    Lightning bolts become my swords
    When I pull them from the sky
    Run my gauntlet of slashing rain
    You won’t survive to testify

    When you see the clouds blacken
    Remember you’ve been warned
    No shelter from my fierce winds
    Because, I am the storm

    I am the storm – Blue Oyster Cult

    A bit stalkerish for me.

    Aces and Eights being the Dead Man’s Hand, of course.

  40. 40.

    germy

    Wait a minute Doug!

    That “awful Juice Newton song” from your childhood is her crappy cover of an excellent Dave Edmunds record!

    “Playin’ with the Queen of Hearts, knowin’ it ain’t really smart, the joker ain’t the only fool…” etc.

    The Dave Edmunds version is great, IMHO

  41. 41.

    Mary G

    I have been an idiot. I took a shower and fell on my ass on the bathroom floor. I didn’t bring a phone in and haven’t set up email on this tablet. I was able to email Betty Cracker through the contact page asking her to call 911 for me, but I don’t have a way to know if she got it. If any other front pagers are around, can you let me know.

  42. 42.

    Helen

    @Trollhattan: Truly I don’t have a clue how or why I remembered that. But when saw the words, the song came tumbling back into my mind.

  46. 46.

    FlipYrWhig

    Midnight Oil, Outside World:

    There’s a wind on the eastern side
    Ghost gums dance in the moonlit night
    Mopoke mourns the racketeers
    The bosses they can sense your mood
    All in place to a hand that rules
    They all want to deal you out

    I can see the outside world
    Everything’s inviting in the outside world
    Leaving all my problems in the outside world

    It’s the summer of another year
    A little world weary a little more to fear
    Hold those cards tight to your chest
    Maybe someday you could be a man
    Living quietly in a caravan
    Not the Lismore road tonight

  48. 48.

    Mp

    The Road Goes on Forever by Robert Earl Keen, though I prefer The Highwaymen’s version.

  49. 49.

    Nameless GenXer

    @raven:

    Ding ding ding!

    Also too, Me and My Uncle, and I left his dead ass there by the side of the road.

  53. 53.

    OldDave

    @Mary G:

    email Betty Cracker through the contact page asking her to call 911 for me

    You OK? Has 911 been notified? Something we could do?

  54. 54.

    Lolis

    This song by Ages and Ages, “Divisionary (Do the Right Thing)” strikes me as particularly relevant in these times.

  55. 55.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Mary G:

    Good heavens! I hope you get help, and quickly! Wishing you the best, and let us know when you can.

  58. 58.

    MattF

    Lucinda Williams, King of Hearts. And I’m mildly pissed off that I’m the first to mention it.

    ETA: Mary G: If you’re in the DC area, email me at [email protected]

  62. 62.

    reality-based (the original, not the troll)

    Jack of diamonds, queen of spades
    Fingers tremble and the memory fades
    And it’s a foolish man, who tries to bluff the dealer
    Jokers laughed and lady luck smiled
    The aces were high and the deuces were wild
    When you’re down and losin’, everyone’s a cheater

    You can’t win and you can’t break even
    You can’t get out of the game
    You shouldn’t stay but you ain’t leavin’
    ‘Cos your luck may change again

    “Dealer (Down & Losin’)”

    by Bob Ruzika

    judy collins did a great version, here

  66. 66.

    cmorenc

    When I’m on a long plane flight, I prefer to spend my time looking out the window thinking about all the little ant-people below me in flyover country, going about their ant-business in all the little ant-villages.

    :=)

  68. 68.

    piratedan

    @germy: agreed germy and how in the hell the radio stations across the land backed Ms. Newton’s version… sigh…

    and the only other addition I can make is Ned Miller’s “From a Jack to a King”

  73. 73.

    Mandarama

    “Carmelita,” one of my all-time favorite songs!
    Well, I’m sittin’ here playing solitaire
    With my pearl-handled deck
    The county won’t give me no more methadone
    And they cut off your welfare check…

    Thanks, Mr. Zevon. I also love “Desperado.” (I even like Linda Ronstadt’s covers of both songs. Shuddup, it’s because my mom used to play them!)

  74. 74.

    Mary G

    @OldDave: I don’t know if 911 has been called but a housemate will be home eventually. I am not hurt, just uncomfortable and kind of penned in. I sent up the bat signal to other front pagers and I did manage to get into my email on line, so something will happen sooner or later.

  79. 79.

    Helen

    Hey Doug! did you banhammer srv? Yeah he’s an asshole, but “FREEBIRD” made me LOL. Of course I am on an Amtrak train to Vermont and it is the trip that will never ever end so I am feeling kinda punchy. A 8 1/2 hour trip that will be at least 10 hours. Really. It’s only 6 1/2 hours to Dublin. I may as well just continue on to Canada.

  80. 80.

    Schlemazel Khan

    @petesh:
    It was a horror of a small market station. The owner had 200 albums & they were divided by type, ‘C&W’, Male vocal, instrumental etc. I had to play them in order but could select any of the songs on the album (although some were scratched out as unacceptable. It does not take long to play every song on every record when I was working 6 10 hour days.

  88. 88.

    raven

    @Betty Cracker: ” I was able to email Betty Cracker through the contact page asking her to call 911 for me, but I don’t have a way to know if she got it. If any other front pagers are around, can you let me know.”

  89. 89.

    Mandarama

    @raven: Oh, I know! I’m sorry, I wasn’t clear… Or I might have had a subconscious resistance to bringing up the Eagles in the same sentence as Warren Zevon? Hmm.

    Not that I’m a purist. I was a teenager in the 80s, and I’m raising a preteen and a teen now, so I am pretty sure I can listen to almost anything!

  91. 91.

    Trollhattan

    MaryG, hang in there!

    I notice nobody is pinging Cole, an expert in all falling matters indoors and out.

  97. 97.

    Schlemazel Khan

    @raven:
    None of those records were newer than 15 years old. The worst were the polka records. Mom used to play polka records while we cleaned on Saturdays (along with lefty commie folk singers) but they were decent groups with quality recordings. The stuff I had to play sounded like it had been recorded by a bunch of random strangers in a burned out garage near Biwabik.

  105. 105.

    Trollhattan

    @kindness:
    Bob Weir recorded “Ace” but running songs through my head I don’t recall anything about cards and such. Does have a “Han shot first” song, though.

  106. 106.

    Elizabelle

    @Mai.naem.mobile: Higgs Bosun Mate was around; they built some wonderful planters and garden stuff. And his lil dog Leland.

    Mary G: hope you are up and about by now. Let us know!

  108. 108.

    scav

    If the email connection to Betty isn’t working, Could MaryG put her address into into the website field so that Betty could peek there and call the appropriate 911? Tying to think of a full web-based approach that doesn’t expose her address to everybody. Typing it in as a comment but with a known SPAM or Moderation term would work too (use a slightly different name with the same email) — Betty could grab info from that filter.

    ETA Leaving a comment as to method attempted plus general update would help and relieve everyone clearly.

  109. 109.

    Iowa Old Lady

    While we’re waiting for the cavalry to arrive at Mary G’s place, I’m glad for the musical diversions. I just watched The Daily Show and the Nightly Show from Tuesday, and everyone on both shows took Comey’s comments at face value. Clinton had multiple devices, passed classified email, was hacked, and lied about it all.

  117. 117.

    JPL

    Mary G. could leave her address with someone on the site, in case it’s needed next time. Hopefully, someone has arrived and that’s why we haven’t heard anything else.

  118. 118.

    Mary G

    I sent a regular email to Betty. I guess I’ll get the life alert thingies now. Or ok overcome my aversion to face book.

  124. 124.

    Mnemosyne

    @Mary G:

    Nobody wants to have to deal with the Life Alert thing, but if you’re disabled and in danger of falling, it’s a good idea. Does the state help with the cost at all?

  132. 132.

    mtraven

    Another Dead song with cards is Dire Wolf:
    The Wolf came in, I got my cards, we sat down for a game
    I cut my deck to the Queen of Spades, but the cards were all the same

    And of course since Deadheads are geeks, here is an annotated concordance of gambling references…

  143. 143.

    D58826

    OK I’m confused. There has been this ongoing argument about the ‘classified’ e-mails that were found on Hillary’s server. Now a goodly number were retroactively classified so even Comey doesn’t want to talk about them. I keep see that the 3 e-mails that were classified may or maynot have been properly coded when the hit Hillary’s server. So what we are talking about at this point is 3 improperly coded e-mails out of 30,000? Or am I missing something?

  144. 144.

    Mary G

    Thanks to everyone for their concern. I’ve emailed some local friends but not heard back yet.

  147. 147.

    Trollhattan

    @jayboat:
    I knew there was a Gallagher song! Couldn’t dredge it up, though.

    He’d still be playing if it weren’t for the whole ruined liver thing.

  148. 148.

    FlipYrWhig

    @Iowa Old Lady: Unsurprising. I remember Jon Stewart being repeatedly suckered by various scandals including O’Keefe’s fake pimp fiasco. And Wilmore to me seems to have a bug up his butt when it comes to HRC.

  149. 149.

    Mnemosyne

    @satby:

    I didn’t want to make the joke before the EMTs were contacted, but it did strike me as funny.

  155. 155.

    FlipYrWhig

    @D58826: I think the operative distinction is “email whose contents relate in some way to classified material” vs. “emails marked classified.” Not all of the former are encompassed by the latter. HRC and staff seem to have been very careful about the latter. Comey was grumbling about carelessness regarding the former. So the whole discussion/debate is on one level semantics, on another talking past one another, and on another just uninformed rank bullshit by stupid people who don’t know any better.

  156. 156.

    Mai.naem.mobile

    @Mary G: you can get a life alert like thing at a big box store and it connects to your phone and calls 911 so you don’t have the monthly fee. I have a friend who was going to do it for his mom but hospice ended up paying for it. The system was pretty cheap(I think <$50.) Sometimes insurance covers it too.

  159. 159.

    Aleta

    @satby: I assume you had her address because Soap to the rescue ? If so that is a cool byproduct of your good work…

  160. 160.

    hovercraft

    @D58826:
    According to Comey today 3 of the e-mails contained ‘classified or confidential’ information within the body of the e-mail with a (C), but the e-mails themselves were not labeled as classified. So when the e-mails came in there was no way to know they were classified until you opened the e-mail. And according to the State Department they were mislabeled.

  162. 162.

    Mary G

    The paramedics came and picked me up. The cute ones! My caregiver is on the way in case I need to go to the ER, but I don’t think it’s necessary.

  165. 165.

    MattF

    @hovercraft: (C) is confidential, which is the lowest level of classification. And who knows where that classification came from.

  170. 170.

    D58826

    @FlipYrWhig: And if the one that Cormay was complaining about were sent to Hillary, how is she responsible for that? and if she had been using the State dept. server she would have gotten the same e-mail on an unsecured server that was just as vulnerable to being hacked. In fact maybe more so since everyone in the world knows about the state department. It would have taken a hacker a bit more time and skill to stumble on Hillary’s.

  172. 172.

    Mnemosyne

    @Mary G:

    You are totally going to be the top anecdote at their holiday party. … and then the guy said he was calling from West Virginia, and the next call was in Florida ..

  173. 173.

    rikyrah

    Lois BeckettVerified account
    ‏@loisbeckett
    Today, I asked @LarryPratt of @GunOwners if they had ever publicly condemned the police shooting of a black American. He hung up on me.

  176. 176.

    D58826

    @Iowa Old Lady: Well what most people heard was 48 hours of Cormey’s hatchet job from Tuesday. To get down into the details is either to hard for must of the VSP or they are already Gooper mouthpieces.

  181. 181.

    hovercraft

    @MattF:
    According to the State Department the (C) designation in the body of the e-mail was a result of human error, they did not contain confidential or classified info. Comey said today that he was not aware of this correction by the State Dept.

  183. 183.

    hovercraft

    @Mary G:
    Hey 5 calls is better than no calls. tell them that you can’t help it if you have friends all over the world that you’ve never met, but who care about your well being. They should be so lucky.

  184. 184.

    Mary G

    @debbie: I found the non-emergency number online and sent it in my message, so John and Betty had to make long-distance calls, but no real emergency got squeezed out. Thank you again to everyone for the encouragement and support. This is a great community.

  185. 185.

    D58826

    @hovercraft: Of course he wasn’t. Would have made his entire Tue. rant look like an even bigger hit job that it already did.

    So long story short, when Hillary said she did not have any classified e-mails on her system she was telling the truth. Wonder how long that it will take for that piece of news to get out? Maybe Capt Picard can announce it over the starship intercomm.

  186. 186.

    Schlemazel Khan

    I reiterate, this place is amazing! I am proud just to hang around here . . . which is all I could have done anyway.

    You guys are the best

  187. 187.

    Jacel

    I’m so glad your initial post mentioned “Flowers On The Wall”. I can hardly see a deck of cards without thinking of that song.

    I’ll add an opera, Tchaikovsky’s “The Queen Of Spades” based on a Pushkin story.
    And a ballet, Stravinsky’s “Jeu de cartes”

  189. 189.

    burnspbesq

    The third verse of “Carmelita” isn’t about cards, it’s about suicide. “Pearl-handled deck.”

    And “Queen of Hearts” (a great Rodney Crowell song that was butchered by Juice Newton) also isn’t about cards, it’s an unrequited-love (or maybe toxic-love) song.

    I’ve been playin’ with the Queen of Hearts
    and knowin’ it ain’t really smart,
    the joker ain’t the only fool
    who’d do anything for you.

  190. 190.

    D58826

    news feed has afdew more bits from Cormay’s testimony. He says its reasonable to assume that some of the destroyed e-mails were classified. And I think it’s reasonable to assume that the moon is made of green cheese. I mean seriously, given the stakes involved isn’t there some level of proof/evidence that is required before you start running your mouth on national TV. He also said that Hillary let her lawyers look at the documents w/o the proper clearance. But when pressed by the democrats he could not confirm that they didnot have security clearance. Another one of his reasonable assumptions I guess.

    And it was just announced that State is going to reopen their investigation into possible administrative penalties.

    Did anyone investigate the Bush/Iraq lies for this length of time.

  195. 195.

    john fremont

    Not actually about a card game , but they use card game metaphors,

    Jack O Diamonds by Odetta.
    From A Jack to a King ,done by Ricky Van Shelton and I think Jim Reeves.
    You’re My Best Poker Hand by blues legend T-Bone Walker

  199. 199.

    No One You Know

    @Mary G: You’ve been a human, I think, and not an idiot; I hope you are better soon, and that we hear from you, even if it’s from your bed. Sending Good thoughts your way!

  200. 200.

    low-tech cyclist

    Dylan’s “Sad-Eyed Lady of the Lowlands” mentions “your deck of cards missing the jack and the ace.”

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