Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

Come on, media. you have one job. start doing it.

Fundamental belief of white supremacy: white people are presumed innocent, minorities are presumed guilty.

We are builders in a constant struggle with destroyers. keep building.

Perhaps you mistook them for somebody who gives a damn.

The words do not have to be perfect.

Too often we confuse noise with substance. too often we confuse setbacks with defeat.

Not rolling over. fuck you, make me.

Their boy Ron is an empty plastic cup that will never know pudding.

“Facilitate” is an active verb, not a weasel word.

No Kings: Americans standing in the way of bad history saying “Oh, Fuck No!”

People are complicated. Love is not.

When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it.

Let’s not be the monsters we hate.

There are a lot more evil idiots than evil geniuses.

Trump’s cabinet: like a magic 8 ball that only gives wrong answers.

“The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.”

When I was faster i was always behind.

Let the trolls come, and then ignore them. that’s the worst thing you can do to a troll.

Reality always gets a vote in the end.

Humiliatingly small and eclipsed by the derision of millions.

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

Black Jesus loves a paper trail.

We know you aren’t a Democrat but since you seem confused let me help you.

You are here: Home / Elections / Election 2016 / Late Night RNC Fustercluck Open Thread

Late Night RNC Fustercluck Open Thread

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209Comments

  2. 2.

    Deecarda

    They began the convention with rebellion & ended the night with plagiarism, wow what a cluster. And they expect the key to the White House.

  4. 4.

    Dog Dawg Damn

    This is blowing up. The video is damning. Looks like an inside job, but she told Matt Lauer she wrote it herself.

    What a disaster.

  6. 6.

    bluehill

    I think I have a lot better understanding why Trump has filed for bankruptcy so often.

  7. 7.

    Trentrunner

    Someone pointed out: Imagine what would happen if Michelle Obama had plagiarized a Laura Bush speech.

    Yeah. Everyone’s defending Melanoma. She said–twice–that she wrote the speech. She’s accountable.

    (Btw, I’m sure she didn’t write it. But she SAID she did.)

  8. 8.

    Mike in NC

    Drumpf can wrap this shindig up with a massive book burning, so long as they don’t include any of his ghostwritten crap.

  9. 9.

    Dog Dawg Damn

    And just to note–they didn’t plagiarize anyone’s speech. They plagiarized Michelle Obama’s speech. The optics are terrible. She is a plastic clone version of a real person. And not even Laura Bush. But the dreaded black FLOTUS.

    OH THE GNASHING OF TEETH.

  11. 11.

    LaterThanYouThink

    This should give you a god idea of what the first 90 days of a Drumpf presidency would look like, complete clusterf. . . !

  14. 14.

    Kropadope

    From a planning and timing perspective, the first night of this convention has been an absolute disaster

    He’s right, they timed it for after the Republicans chose to nominate Trump.

  17. 17.

    Mike J

    WaPo hed says “Melania Trump’s speech appears to have cribbed from Michelle Obama’s in 2008”.

    “Cribbed.” Sounds more like a memory aid from junior high than “stolen” does, and is probably more ems wide in the hed.

  18. 18.

    trollhattan

    @Trentrunner:
    “Four twenties and seven more of them, my husband’s hair brought forth gales of laughter. Today, we are engaged in laughing still.”

  19. 19.

    PhoenixRising

    Be fair y’all: the whole campaign is a batshit knockoff of Goldwater’s.

    In your gut, you know they’re nuts.

  24. 24.

    bluehill

    @Dog Dawg Damn: Unfortunately, Trump’s base doesn’t care about her speech writing. If it hasn’t already been done, I’m expecting some lewd comparisons between Melania and Dem first ladies.

  25. 25.

    Trentrunner

    I wonder if Trump himself orchestrated this so he could gallantly bow out to shield his wife from the hostile press…possible?

  28. 28.

    Adam L Silverman

    I put the below in a comment in the previous thread. I think it is appropriate for this one too:

    I have a theory about the Trump campaign even though I know its not provable. I think Manafort, who is now (technically) running things has spent so much time running things for dictators and tyrants that he has forgotten that in the US norms and processes actually matter. So the chaos we’re seeing around Manafort’s client and his operations, campaign, and convention, which would be officially ignored in the places that Manafort is used to working for the better part of the past twenty years because if it wasn’t, the dictator’s he works for would direct state terror (the direction of the power of the state, including the threat of and actual violence against groups and demographics within the state in order to create a state of fear to coerce political, economic, social, and economic activities) against whoever stepped out of line and reported what was actually going on. In short: Manafort thinks he’s still working for Viktor Yanukovych.

  30. 30.

    gf120581

    “I was born a poor black child…”

    “Uh, Mrs. Trump, I’ve got Steve Martin on line one…”

  33. 33.

    amk

    @bluehill: who cares if his vile base cares or not? he is not in primaries any more. the racism to the plagiarism, the msm is covering his ugly ass. the others are doing their fucking job.

  35. 35.

    trollhattan

    “Life is like a box of truffles. Not chocolate truffles–as if!–but real truffles from Italy, shaved over angelhair pasta. Speaking of angelhair….”

    -Melania Trump

  36. 36.

    Lizzy L

    Not the ending I expected. But I’ll take it…

    It’s been a long day. I’m going to bed. G’night Gracie.

  37. 37.

    MoeLarryAndJesus

    “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” – Melania Trump

  38. 38.

    PhoenixRising

    @Mike J: right but was the help she admits to from Steve Martin?

    Jesus. Manafort really does think he can just have Josh Marshall jailed. This is a frightening degree of contempt for competence.

  40. 40.

    patroclus

    “Four score and seven years ago, our forefathers brought forth to this land a new nation.”

    “We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds.”

    “THIS was their finest hour.”

    “Let the word go forth to friend and foe alike.”

    Melania Trump

  41. 41.

    pseudonymous in nc

    It had a fucking Rickroll in it.

    2016 everything is trolling.

    This isn’t just a comments section turned into a presidential campaign, this is a 4chan /pol/ thread turned into a presidential campaign.

  46. 46.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    Okay, I’ll play:

    “I’d like to be queen of people’s hearts!”
    -Melania Trump

  48. 48.

    trollhattan

    “Free at last, free at last, god almighty, I’m free at last!*”

    –Melania Trump

    *Depending on the prenup, may actually be true.

  49. 49.

    Adam L Silverman

    @Trentrunner: Thanks. As I replied to someone else below, I don’t know how we’d prove it, but it seems to make sense. Especially given every interview I’ve seen with/of Manafort who basically puts forward that things will be done the way they will be done and none should gainsay it.

  50. 50.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Mike J:

    NYT headline is Melania Trump Echoes a Michelle Obama Speech and goes on to note that the speech “came under scrutiny when similarities were discovered between her remarks and those delivered by Mrs. Obama at the Democratic convention in 2008.”

    Echoes.
    Similarities were discovered.

  51. 51.

    The Dangerman

    Melania: “The only thing we have to beer … is beer, itself! How do you like it, Donald?”

    Donald: “Sounds great”.

    Actually, I feel bad for the woman; she didn’t sign up for this shit show.

    ETA: That said, if Michelle had cribbed off of Laura Bush, there would be hell to pay; welcome to the Big Leagues, Melania.

  56. 56.

    patroclus

    “To be or not to be.”

    “Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou, Romeo”

    -Melania Trump

  62. 62.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    speaking of Josh Marshall

    Josh Marshall ‏@ joshtpm 10m10 minutes ago
    I see grifter families like the Trumps with degenerate culture stealing from an upstanding American family like Obamas & its just sickening.

  63. 63.

    BR

    All of you, not just trollhattan…

    Not sure what a good hashtag would be…not something I’m good at.

  67. 67.

    Mike J

    southpaw ‏@nycsouthpaw 4 minutes ago
    Robert Costa has a source that says Melania wrote a significant amount of the speech, and Chris Matthews isn’t willing to entertain it.

    Jonathan M. Katz Verified account ‏@KatzOnEarth 4 minutes ago
    Guys, this isn’t a book report on the Great Gatsby. Melania was claiming to recount core values her parents taught about honesty and work.

  70. 70.

    patroclus

    “I have a Dream, that one day, we will judge people not by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.”

    -Melania Trump

  72. 72.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @bluehill: @Dog Dawg Damn: Unfortunately, Trump’s base doesn’t care about her speech writing. If it hasn’t already been done, I’m expecting some lewd comparisons between Melania and Dem first ladies.

    half your right-wing uncles, brothers-in-law, neighbors and co-workers already believe deep in their bones that Michelle Obama stole a speech from that nice Mrs Trump.

  75. 75.

    Brachiator

    @J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford:

    Apparently Melania Trump cribbed a 30 second passage from Michelle Obama‘s speech.

    Here’s how America works. White conservatives will praise Melania’s speech, and even hold her up as an example of grace and intelligence, while deriding Michelle Obama as a whitey hating harpy who could never match Mrs Trump, let alone deliver a speech as original as Mrs Trump.

  83. 83.

    Adam L Silverman

    @Mike J: And that Manafort vetted it. I think the real takeaway is that his source is positioning Manafort to take the fall. I bet the source’s name begins with an L and ends with a ski.

  89. 89.

    patroclus

    “Tattaglia’s a pimp. But I did not know until this day that it was Barzini all along.”

    -Melania Trump

  92. 92.

    trollhattan

    “I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness, starving hysterical naked, dragging themselves through the negro streets at dawn looking for an angry fix angelheaded hipsters burning for the ancient heavenly connection to the starry dynamo in the machinery of the night. Yay, Republicans!”

    –Melana Trump

  95. 95.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @Adam L Silverman: Oh, now that would be highly amusing if it turns out to be the case.

    So, the question becomes who exactly are the Hydra agents in the Drumpf Campaign?

  100. 100.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    “My fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country.”
    -Melania Trump

  101. 101.

    Oldgold

    Melania Trump – 2016 RNC convention:

    From a young age, my parents impressed on me the values that you work hard for what you want in life, that your word is your bond and you do what you say and keep your promise, that you treat people with respect,” Melania Trump said in her speech. “They taught and showed me morals in their daily life. That is the lesson that I continue to pass along to our son. And we need to pass those lessons on to many generations to follow because we want our children in this nation to know that the only limit to your achievements is the strength of your dreams and your willingness to work for them.”
    Michelle Obama – 2008 DNC convention:

    “… Barack and I were raised with so many of the same values: that you work hard for what you want in life; that your word is your bond and you do what you say you’re going to do; that you treat people with dignity and respect, even if you don’t know them, and even if you don’t agree with them,” Obama said, according to a transcript. “And Barack and I set out to build lives guided by these values, and pass them on to the next generation. Because we want our children — and all children in this nation — to know that the only limit to the height of your achievements is the reach of your dreams and your willingness to work for them.”

  102. 102.

    trollhattan

    “You tell Rafael that I ain’t taking no jive from no Western Union messenger. You tell that asshole if he got something to tell me to get his ass down here himself.”

    –Melana Trump

  103. 103.

    patroclus

    ” By Grabthar’s Hammer, by the Suns of Warvan, What a Savings!”

    -Melania Trump

  106. 106.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    Former Senator from Florida (Lemieux?) saying the speeches are kind of similar, the kind of things parents say to their kids.

    Already has Laura Bush speech from 2004 arguing she said the same sort of thing.

    Tweety having fucking none of it.

  107. 107.

    Prescott Cactus

    ” Seventeen *days*? ? ? We’re not gonna last 17 hours”

    -Melania Trump

  114. 114.

    trollhattan

    “We choose to go to the moonBarbados and these other things, not because they are easy but because they are hard. Speaking of hard, Donald told me to assure you….”

    –Melana Trump

  116. 116.

    Adam L Silverman

    @Villago Delenda Est: Apparently it was leaked today that Manafort is very concerned, which I took to be Manafort at least approved the leak, that Lewandowski is still, despite being fired, advising Trump. He’s worried Lewandowski will encourage him to be himself and do at the convention what he did during the primaries. These guys clearly don’t like each other and would rather hurt each other than support the guy they claim to be loyal to.

  117. 117.

    Trentrunner

    Josh Marshall reminds us that we should not expect Trump & Co to react as any other conventional campaign would.

    I’m starting to think they’ll pushback, say that it’s a media creation, that great American ideas don’t have a single author, blah blah blah.

  119. 119.

    Villago Delenda Est

    “I’ve made a big mistake”

    — Melina Trump

    “There’s money in the banana stand!”

    — Melina Trump

  125. 125.

    Brachiator

    “You don’t want the truth because deep down in places you don’t talk about at parties, you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall.”

    — M Trump

  126. 126.

    The Dangerman

    @amk:

    But, she did sign up for it.

    I don’t agree; she signed up for “better or worse”, true, but Trump running for President as the biggest asshole around? No, I don’t think she signed up for THAT.

  130. 130.

    Mike J

    Jon Favreau ‏@jonfavs 1 minute ago
    Should also say that, like her husband, Michelle wrote a lot of that 2008 campaign speech herself.

    (Favreau is a former Obama scribe)

  131. 131.

    jacy

    Tweety just said Guliani’s speech had an “urban edge” to it. LOL. This whole evening must be what it’s like to take acid.

  132. 132.

    Bailey

    “That’s one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.”
    – Melania Trump

  133. 133.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    Four hours after Rudi’s speech, sounds like Tweety needs to contact his physician

  140. 140.

    trollhattan

    “The war situation has developed not necessarily to Japan’s advantage. ”

    –MelanaTrump

  146. 146.

    patroclus

    “When logic and proportion
    have fallen sloppy dead
    And the White Knight is talking backwards
    and the Red Queen’s off with her head
    Remember what the dormouse said
    Feed your head
    Feed your head”

    -Melania Trump

  147. 147.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @Adam L Silverman: The day Lewandowski was fired, someone mentioned they saw him on one of the Cable networks and his demeanor was not that of someone who had just been fired.

  151. 151.

    Dog Dawg Damn

    “@MaryRC: this ones my favorite.

    How about. “An now, say hello to my little handed friend!” –Melania Trump

  152. 152.

    khead

    “Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon the with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers.”

    – Melania Trump

  156. 156.

    scav

    Oh tut tut, how can all you people doubt the nice white lady? Didn’t Steve King explicitly include Eastern Europe in his definition of the all-important western white sub-groups that created all the important stuff in civilization? So clearly, the nice white eastern European lady created all that is important in this very civilized speech. It all hangs together.

  157. 157.

    NotMax

    “We know where the enemy are. They’re in the area around Washington and east, west, south, and north somewhat.”

    – M. Trump

  159. 159.

    patroclus

    “With confidence in our armed forces, with the unbounding determination of our people, we shall gain the inevitable triumph, so help us God!!”

    –Melania Trump

  161. 161.

    Koalaholik

    And I would have gotten away with it if it wasn’t for you meddling kids

    – Melania Trump

  163. 163.

    khead

    “Fredo, you’re my older brother and I love you. But don’t ever take sides with anyone against the family again.”

    – Melania Trump

  164. 164.

    patroclus

    “We The People of the United States of America, in order to form a more perfect union…”

    -Melania Trump

  165. 165.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    I remember commenting something to that effect, although I’m sure I wasn’t the only one (and in my case, I had audio only).

    I did see a blurb earlier today that CNN has finally acknowledged that Lewandowski is being paid by Trump.

    Clusterfuck is an inadequate word for this entire … thing.

  168. 168.

    Villago Delenda Est

    “That man is playing Galaga! He thought we wouldn’t notice, but we did.”

    — Melina Trump

  169. 169.

    Anne Laurie

    @Dog Dawg Damn:

    This is blowing up. The video is damning. Looks like an inside job, but she told Matt Lauer she wrote it herself.

    Well, from Melania’s point of view… the longer her Trophy Husband continues this farce, the worse it will be for the family’s fortunes (such as they are) and her own young kid’s future (unlike the other Trumpspawn, he isn’t old enough to have finished an expensive education, much less started his own ‘business’ to siphon money out of the family coffers). And it’s not like she wants to be First Lady, I suspect — she hasn’t even done much of the rich-lady hobby-work like setting up a foundation to pay for throwing ‘charity balls’, or pretending to design knockoff jewelry from Chinese sweatshops under her own ‘brand’.

    Melania’s got herself a full-time job being the Rich Man’s Wife. It’s no sinecure — in some ways it’s a lot like being a sports professional — but since her chosen Rich Man isn’t really in the top ranks or trying to get there, she hasn’t had to compete as strenuously as she would if she were married to a really powerful man that other younger would-be Rich Men’s Wives might want to entice.

    She was happy being the equivalent of the baron’s lady, and now her dumb husband has let a bunch of scheming courtiers talk him into attempting a run at the king’s throne. Sooner this crap is smothered… along, preferably, with some of those courtiers… the sooner she can get back to her own life!

  172. 172.

    patroclus

    “All the leaves are brown
    and the sky is gray
    I’ve been for a walk
    on a winter’s day
    I’d be safe and warm
    if I was in L.A.
    California Dreaming
    on such a winter’s day!”

    -Melania Trump

  178. 178.

    Cat48

    Maybe she thought it was ok to do this. Trump has said twice he’s going to give Richard Nixon’s Law & Order speech for his acceptance speech. Nixon also used it as his acceptance speech.

  179. 179.

    Anne Laurie

    @Trentrunner:

    I wonder if Trump himself orchestrated this so he could gallantly bow out to shield his wife from the hostile press…possible?

    Nah, Melania’s graciously taking the hit so her poor, addled, elderly husband will no longer be abused as a catspaw for his scheming older kids & self-interested courtiers. She’s like Cordelia to King Lear! (/snark)

  181. 181.

    Anne Laurie

    @Adam L Silverman:

    In short: Manafort thinks he’s still working for Viktor Yanukovych.

    Nothing in Trump’s World would disabuse him of this notion, would it?

  182. 182.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    @Anne Laurie:

    She was happy being the equivalent of the baron’s lady,

    Isn’t Melinia married to John Barron(or is it John Miller)?

  183. 183.

    Trentrunner

    They don’t even mention Michelle.

    Pretty fucking arrogant. So it was just coincidence?

  184. 184.

    hovercraft

    @Anne Laurie:

    Melania Timepieces & Fashion Jewelry — Jewelry — QVC.com
    ‎
    Find a large selection of Melania Trump Jewelry items at QVC.com. When it comes to Melania Trump Jewelry, Don’t Just Shop. Q.

  188. 188.

    patroclus

    “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator with certain inalienable rights.”

    -Melania Trump

  189. 189.

    Adam L Silverman

    @Trentrunner: Its nice given the time of night. The real issue is what happens when Trump starts tweeting in another hour or so.

  191. 191.

    Trentrunner

    Will be interesting to see what HRC & the Dems do with this.

    I’m guessing stand back and let Trump fuck his own cluster?

  192. 192.

    patroclus

    “My only regret is that I have just one life to give for my country”

    -Melania Trump

  195. 195.

    Roger Moore

    @Trentrunner:
    I think the correct response is for the Democrats to say they want to respond to the horrible substance of the rest of the night. If the press wants to go crazy about plagarismghazi, that’s fine, but combating the Republicans toxic ideology has to be job #1.

  197. 197.

    Carl W

    Jordan Brown ‏@JBrownGatsby 9m9 minutes ago
    “Barack Obama is still the same man I fell in love with all those years ago” #FamousMelaniaTrumpQuotes

  198. 198.

    hovercraft

    @Anne Laurie:
    Wasn’t sure if you were snarking, I only know because her business acumen is used to show how accomplished she is in her own right, not a trophy wife.

  199. 199.

    Trentrunner

    @Roger Moore: Agreed.

    Though I also like Josh Barro’s take, which is those who are calling the Melania scandal small potatoes miss that it’s about wondering what the Trumps WON’T lie about.

    And it looks like Josh Marshall (again) predicted correctly: Trump doubled down, said the speech was great, didn’t admit anything was wrong.

    Interesting. Next week Bill Clinton should just read Melania’s speech, verbatim in its entirety. For the lulz.

  200. 200.

    sukabi

    @Trentrunner: good god, can you imagine the shitshow that would cause? You’d have all the usual suspects lining up to start investigations, the Clinton hating press would be breathlessly pumping out new whitewater rehashes….

    There’s already enough stupid shit for the media to focus on, don’t give them back their favorite chew toy.

  201. 201.

    Gerald

    @J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford:

    Haaaaaaahhhhaaaaa ….imitation IS the highest form of flattery!

    Her husband wants to be POTUS Obama and she wants to be FLOTUS Mrs Michelle Obama!

    Orange wants to be the new Black!

    Oh sweet baby Jesus …you can’t make this shit up!!!!

  203. 203.

    Shalimar

    @Trentrunner:

    I wonder if Trump himself orchestrated this so he could gallantly bow out to shield his wife from the hostile press…possible?

    Pre-planning it as an exit strategy would involve Donald Trump realizing that plagiarism is a bad thing that his wife will be attacked for.

  205. 205.

    gogol's wife

    WHY ARE YOU GUYS MAKING IT SO I CAN’T DO ANYTHING BUT READ BALLOON JUICE 24/7?

  206. 206.

    Uncle Cosmo

    @Anne Laurie:

    Slovenian girls seem to find out early
    How to open conventions with a smile
    Her rich old candidate says not to worry
    He’ll steal her the best speech to give in style

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