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Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Not all heroes wear capes.

Hey Washington Post, “Democracy Dies in Darkness” was supposed to be a warning, not a mission statement.

But frankly mr. cole, I’ll be happier when you get back to telling us to go fuck ourselves.

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

Incompetence, fear, or corruption? why not all three?

The republican caucus is covering themselves with something, and it is not glory.

There are a lot more evil idiots than evil geniuses.

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

Well, whatever it is, it’s better than being a Republican.

We can’t confuse what’s necessary to win elections with the policies that we want to implement when we do.

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

Republicans: The threats are dire, but my tickets are non-refundable!

Too often we confuse noise with substance. too often we confuse setbacks with defeat.

if you can’t see it, then you are useless in the fight to stop it.

People identifying as christian while ignoring christ and his teachings is a strange thing indeed.

We are aware of all internet traditions.

Petty moves from a petty man.

Balloon Juice, where there is always someone who will say you’re doing it wrong.

I really should read my own blog.

I’m more christian than these people and i’m an atheist.

In my day, never was longer.

The rest of the comments were smacking Boebert like she was a piñata.

This isn’t Democrats spending madly. This is government catching up.

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You are here: Home / Politics / Domestic Politics / Hermine Blows

Hermine Blows

by Betty Cracker|  September 1, 20163:36 pm| 169 Comments

This post is in: Domestic Politics, How about that weather?, Open Threads

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We’re feeling mildish effects of Hurricane Hermine in la Casa de Cracker today. It’s breezy with intermittent rain. The massive Sunshine Skyway Bridge is closed due to wind gusts in excess of 50 MPH.

Alligators are gushing out of storm drains. Well, that’s an exaggeration, though there are rumors of it. One lady uploaded a video of an alligator swimming across the flooded road in front of her car:

I don’t understand everything she’s saying, but she did yield the right-of-way to the gator. It was in the crosswalk, so that was the right thing to do. But what she was doing driving around in that mess, I can’t fathom.

A man in that same area reported a “four-foot gator” swimming down the road near his house. The video above is grainy, but that looks like a bigger gator to me. (My dad is an experienced gator hunter, and he claims you can determine the approximate length of the beast by estimating the inches that separate the eyes from the tip of the snout and converting it to feet.)

Anyhoo, stay dry and safe, folks who are in the path. Thread open to all topics save one: Let’s make this a Trump-free zone, okay? I’m sick of that vile shit-stain.

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Reader Interactions

169Comments

  1. 1.

    Monkeyfister

    September 1, 2016 at 3:42 pm

    Stay safe, Betty Cracker. Remember, like snakes and gators, natural disasters like this will often flush Florida Man out into the streets and neighborhoods.

  2. 2.

    redshirt

    September 1, 2016 at 3:42 pm

    So they’re naming storms after Harry Potter characters now?

    Kids today.

  3. 3.

    Brachiator

    September 1, 2016 at 3:42 pm

    Some crazy bad weather in Hawaii also.

    Residents of Hawaii’s Big Island rushed preparations to completion Wednesday afternoon as a weakening Tropical Storm Madeline closed in, the first of two tropical systems pushing toward the state.

    Hawaii Gov. David Ige declared a state of emergency while the Hawaii County Civil Defense and the American Red Cross of Hawaii opened more than a dozen emergency shelters on the Big Island, Hawaii News Now reported.

    The National Hurricane Center warned that the storm will pass “dangerously close” to the Big Island Wednesday night. Residents on the Big Island scrambled to prepare for the impacts of Madeline by purchasing supplies and boarding up windows.

    “Hopefully our roofs stay on, and our houses don’t float way or get blown away,” Big Island resident Mitzi Bettencourt told the Associated Press. “It’s like, ‘Oh my God, are we going to get flattened or what?'”

  4. 4.

    Anonymous At Work

    September 1, 2016 at 3:44 pm

    Fort Lauderdale area here. I don’t judge the rain to be serious until ducks start riding the alligators in the parking lot.

  5. 5.

    Mnemosyne

    September 1, 2016 at 3:45 pm

    It always kind of amazes me how casual people seem to be about alligators in Florida.

  6. 6.

    Gin & Tonic

    September 1, 2016 at 3:45 pm

    Has anybody used one of those car-buying/pricing services to purchase a new vehicle? Any comments or experiences to share? I haven’t shopped for a new vehicle since about the Pleistocene, but I’m aware that people do it differently than was once the case.

  7. 7.

    Monkeyfister

    September 1, 2016 at 3:46 pm

    @redshirt: This is Hermine. It’s pronounce Her-mine. The HP character is Hermione, pronounced Her -my-o-nee. But, TBH, I keep auto-correcting it in my head, too, so don’t take my pedantry too seriously.

  8. 8.

    DCrefugee

    September 1, 2016 at 3:46 pm

    Earlier today, I had two ‘gators in my flooded backyard lake outside Sillysota. One of them is at least five feet long… And Betty, if you can accurately measure from the snout to the eyes, you’re too damn close…

  9. 9.

    inventor

    September 1, 2016 at 3:46 pm

    She deserves to be “gatored” for taking vertical video! JUST TURN THE PHONE 90 deg! It so easy and the video is 645% better!

  10. 10.

    Betty Cracker

    September 1, 2016 at 3:47 pm

    @Mnemosyne: I don’t know — that lady seemed pretty alarmed about the “cocodrilo”!

  11. 11.

    Monkeyfister

    September 1, 2016 at 3:47 pm

    @Mnemosyne: Darwin always seems to sort them out in the end. Seems like a winning way.

  12. 12.

    Yutsano

    September 1, 2016 at 3:48 pm

    @redshirt: If so, Hermione would be pissed as they’re not spelled the same.

    @Monkeyfister: If they had name it Hermione, that would have been golden. Still waiting for Hepsibah. Maybe next year.

  13. 13.

    c u n d gulag

    September 1, 2016 at 3:49 pm

    I think when alligators and crocodiles start swimming around DC and NYC streets, our MSM and conservative punTWIT’s might finally acknowledge global warming/weirding!

    I’d love one one them to do an adult full-briss on Bill Kristol!
    Not that he’d notice!

  14. 14.

    Mnemosyne

    September 1, 2016 at 3:50 pm

    @Betty Cracker:

    Well, yeah, but she was probably nervous about it somehow getting into her car or sitting on her hood. But when I was down amongst y’all last year, the attitude seemed to be, Oh, yeah, there’s alligators everywhere. Whatcha gonna do?

  15. 15.

    jl

    September 1, 2016 at 3:50 pm

    Good luck to Cracker Inc. throughout the storm. Please keep us updated on developments.

  16. 16.

    Monkeyfister

    September 1, 2016 at 3:51 pm

    @Yutsano: Heheh… alright, alright…
    https://youtu.be/nAQBzjE-kvI?t=46s

  17. 17.

    dmsilev

    September 1, 2016 at 3:52 pm

    If you want to read something insane (but certified Trump-free), I can recommend this story in the LA Times, about a case where a parent could have gotten mildly peeved over a slight misunderstanding with a PTA volunteer at their kid’s elementary school, and instead decided to try to frame said volunteer for drug possession. Parts 1-4 are up on the web site now, parts 5 and 6 should go up in the next day or so.

  18. 18.

    Chyron HR

    September 1, 2016 at 3:52 pm

    @redshirt:

    So they’re naming storms after Harry Potter characters now?

    No, you’re thinking of the Wretched Harmony, a prepubescent medusa.

  19. 19.

    Monkeyfister

    September 1, 2016 at 3:52 pm

    @Yutsano: Indeed!

  20. 20.

    Mike J

    September 1, 2016 at 3:53 pm

    @c u n d gulag:

    I think when alligators and crocodiles start swimming around DC and NYC streets, our MSM and conservative punTWIT’s might finally acknowledge global warming/weirding!

    Leftist PETA animal lovers have gone so far wild animals are running through the streets and we’re powerless to stop them!

  21. 21.

    Mnemosyne

    September 1, 2016 at 3:54 pm

    @dmsilev:

    I had heard about that at the time, but it was the first really in-depth coverage. Talk about white rage and white entitlement …

  22. 22.

    Major Major Major Major

    September 1, 2016 at 3:55 pm

    @redshirt: Misspelled Harry Potter characters at that. What a bunch of jerks.

    Yeah, I know, I’m not the first.

  23. 23.

    Roger Moore

    September 1, 2016 at 3:57 pm

    @Monkeyfister:

    pronounced Her -my-o-nee

    That’s actually “her-MY-o-nee”; being a Greek name, the emphasis is on the antepenultimate syllable.

  24. 24.

    dmsilev

    September 1, 2016 at 3:58 pm

    @Mnemosyne: The actual case happened before I moved here, so this was the first time it really showed up on my radar. Just amazing.

  25. 25.

    rikyrah

    September 1, 2016 at 3:58 pm

    What Colin Kaepernick’s Protest Looks Like to a Black 49ers Fan
    By GERALD HARRIS
    AUG. 31, 2016

    San Francisco — Why are we, as sports fans, continually surprised when one of our heroes turns out to be a real person, with real feelings who is living in the same world we also live in? And when that athlete is black, why does white America respond with anger, as if the hero has broken some kind of sacred rule or understood deal? That deal seems to be, “You just go out and win games, collect your check, and if we really like you, you can retire and sell us stuff in TV commercials.”

    Colin Kaepernick, a quarterback for San Francisco, the city I love and pay a lot to live in, is the latest in a long line of black athletes who have decided to be real people with real concerns about the black community. This tends to happen when issues become so pressing that they break the heart of the athlete and pierce a wall they might choose to stay behind.

    It was the Vietnam War for Muhammad Ali, the civil rights movement for countless others. For Kaepernick, it is the way black and brown people, just like him, are treated in the United States. He felt he could no longer stand for the national anthem at the beginning of 49ers games. In an interview published Saturday, he said, “I am not going to stand up to show pride in a flag for a country that oppresses black people and people of color.”

    I imagine I share with Kaepernick nightmares of the killing of Tamir Rice, Michael Brown and so many others. As an African-American father of two sons who live or work in San Francisco, I fear their lives, or mine, might be taken unjustly in a confrontation with the police; the same police I respect and depend on to protect my community and keep it safe.

  26. 26.

    Trollhattan

    September 1, 2016 at 3:59 pm

    Doesn’t video lady know saying “Ai-yi-yi-yi!” is perpetuating a stereotype? I would have uttered things less acceptable to a family blog, beginning with what I’d call myself for driving onto a gator-enhanced, flooded roadway.

  27. 27.

    Cat48

    September 1, 2016 at 3:59 pm

    Well, Betty Cracker, I hope you have emergency food, flashlights, water, etc, in case it gets really bad. Hopefully the electricity will stay on. Good luck. They may be a bit hysterical here in SC, as the schools are already shut down for tomorrow bc Hurricane! Stay safe

  28. 28.

    Brachiator

    September 1, 2016 at 4:01 pm

    Alligators in Florida. Bears in Pasadena, California

    Three bears wandered into a Pasadena backyard and broke the rear door to the house on Thursday, according to the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department.

    The bears never made entry inside the home, according to Lt. Randy Tuinstra, but were seen swimming in the backyard pool.

  29. 29.

    Mnemosyne

    September 1, 2016 at 4:02 pm

    I have to admit, hearing that John Lewis was crowdsurfing made me super nervous, because he’s 76 years old! Fortunately, the “Colbert” crowd kept that in mind and didn’t drop him.

  30. 30.

    SiubhanDuinne

    September 1, 2016 at 4:06 pm

    @dmsilev:

    Yikes! I read the first instalment (with its cliffhanger last sentence: “I have an enemy.”) but have bookmarked the rest until Sunday, when I’ll be able to read straight through. Don’t think I could stand the suspense otherwise. What a story! (and how compellingly written!)

  31. 31.

    OldDave

    September 1, 2016 at 4:06 pm

    @Roger Moore:

    emphasis is on the antepenultimate syllable

    I’m going to take a wild guess that the highlighted word means “second’. Google. And I’m wrong – it means the third last. So I learned something today. And at my age, I’ll probably learn it a second or third time.

  32. 32.

    slag

    September 1, 2016 at 4:07 pm

    @inventor: Hold up your hand in a vertical position and then turn it 90% either way. Notice how many more muscles you use? It’s not a natural position.

    If phone makers would embrace the reality that most people are naturally going to hold their phones vertically when taking pictures, they might then see fit to shift the default orientation of the phone’s camera to taking (the more generally preferred) landscape pictures in that orientation. Or is there some law of physics demanding that a vertical phone should necessarily default to taking a vertical picture?

  33. 33.

    Iowa Old Lady

    September 1, 2016 at 4:09 pm

    @OldDave:
    Ultimate = last
    Penultimate = second to last
    Antepenultimate = third to last

  34. 34.

    scav

    September 1, 2016 at 4:09 pm

    Although FL may be escaping assault by fictional girl of determination, HI facing down an actual one that to the tiger in the zoo, just said “pooh pooh”.

  35. 35.

    Face

    September 1, 2016 at 4:11 pm

    According to TPM, VA is now a toss-up. Wasn’t HRC up ~13 or so a few weeks ago? Adjust your freakout accordingly.

  36. 36.

    Trollhattan

    September 1, 2016 at 4:12 pm

    @Iowa Old Lady:
    I’ll remember those for roughly one hemidemisemiquaver.

  37. 37.

    dww44

    September 1, 2016 at 4:15 pm

    @Mnemosyne: As one who lives in a state just north, I’d say that it’s because alligators aren’t the most aggressive creatures out there. Now, crocodiles a whole other matter. For me personally, I’m far more frightened by an unexpected encounter with one of the poisonous pit vipers that live here than one with an alligator. Of course, I know better than to go swimming in waters, almost always dark and murky, that will be filled with both sets of reptiles.

  38. 38.

    Trollhattan

    September 1, 2016 at 4:15 pm

    @Face:
    Sam Wang:

    As of September 1, 2:59PM EDT:
    Snapshot (96 state polls): Clinton 341, Trump 197 EV Meta-margin: Clinton +4.9%
    Clinton Nov. win probability: random drift 90%, Bayesian 94%
    Senate snapshot (48 polls): Dem+Ind: 50, GOP: 50, Meta-margin: D +1.9%, Nov. control probability: Dem. 73%

  39. 39.

    dmsilev

    September 1, 2016 at 4:15 pm

    @Brachiator: Well, north of the 210 is the wild side of Pasadena.

    Such as it is.

  40. 40.

    Mnemosyne

    September 1, 2016 at 4:15 pm

    @Brachiator:

    There have been so many swimming bears lately that I’m starting to think it has something to do with the drought.

  41. 41.

    Major Major Major Major

    September 1, 2016 at 4:16 pm

    @Roger Moore: you’re an antepenultimate syllable!

    one of my favorite words :)

  42. 42.

    dmsilev

    September 1, 2016 at 4:17 pm

    @Face: TPM has their “combine multiple polls over time” sensitivity set to “extreme twitchiness”. One poll, however outlier-ish it is, is enough to change their rating of a given state.

  43. 43.

    dmsilev

    September 1, 2016 at 4:18 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    Don’t think I could stand the suspense otherwise.

    Spoiler alert: The butler did it.

    (OK, not really. No butlers were harmed or harmed other people during the telling of this story)

  44. 44.

    redshirt

    September 1, 2016 at 4:20 pm

    @Brachiator: Bears just wanna have fun.

  45. 45.

    JPL

    September 1, 2016 at 4:23 pm

    For those in the path of Hermine, be safe. The storm will miss my burb north of the city, but Raven might get some heavy rain. I have a nice rain shower over my abode, but that’s due to a front coming through.

  46. 46.

    CaseyL

    September 1, 2016 at 4:23 pm

    Thanks for posting, Betty – I wondered how you were doing. Glad to hear all is well so far. The ‘gators must be thrilled that all roads there are now their roads; i.e., rivers.

    @Mnemosyne:

    There have been so many swimming bears lately that I’m starting to think it has something to do with the drought.

    If you go out to swim today, you’re sure of a big surprise
    If you go out to swim today today, you’d better go in disguise
    For every bear that ever there was will gather there together because
    Today’s the day the teddy bears have their beach day!

  47. 47.

    PaulWartenberg2016

    September 1, 2016 at 4:25 pm

    @redshirt:

    They failed! It’s Hermine, not Hermione!

    I blame Congress for forcing NOAA to lose its vowel allotment due to sharp budget cuts!!! Just one extra O, that’s ALL THEY NEEDED! :(

  48. 48.

    Paul in KY

    September 1, 2016 at 4:25 pm

    Betty, hope all our Crackers down there are safe (kids & dogs especially).

  49. 49.

    FlipYrWhig

    September 1, 2016 at 4:26 pm

    @Face: No chance. Something’s hinky in the algorithm.

  50. 50.

    Van Buren

    September 1, 2016 at 4:27 pm

    @Face: Having just driven the length and breadth of Virginia, I estimate the yard sign ratio is about 50 to 1 in favor of Trump. FWIW.

  51. 51.

    PaulWartenberg2016

    September 1, 2016 at 4:27 pm

    My parents live on the edge of the hurricane path and are already getting Tornado Watch alerts.

    I’m kinda okay here in Polk but we’re getting hit with rainstorms.

    To everybody I know in the path, STAY SAFE.

  52. 52.

    Larryb

    September 1, 2016 at 4:33 pm

    @Brachiator:

    Three bears wandered into a Pasadena backyard

    I swear I read, “Three bears walked into a bar…”

  53. 53.

    Major Major Major Major

    September 1, 2016 at 4:35 pm

    @Van Buren: Clearly Mitt Romney is going to win.

  54. 54.

    FlipYrWhig

    September 1, 2016 at 4:37 pm

    @Van Buren: My daily drive (~15 minutes) in southeast VA has the yard sign count at Trump 1, Clinton 0.

  55. 55.

    lurker dean

    September 1, 2016 at 4:40 pm

    @dmsilev: wow, that couple is loathsome.

  56. 56.

    Ian

    September 1, 2016 at 4:44 pm

    @srv:
    Only a month late on that one… do try and keep up.

  57. 57.

    Mike J

    September 1, 2016 at 4:44 pm

    Ellen L Weintraub @EllenLWeintraub
    The @FEC has no opinion on the existence of God. But if she wants to run for U.S. President, she has to fill out her forms like anyone else.

  58. 58.

    Jeffro

    September 1, 2016 at 4:46 pm

    @Mnemosyne: I knew I should have put a link in that last thread! Thanks Mem.

    Ok…so…how do I put a link into a thread without ending up in moderation?

  59. 59.

    redshirt

    September 1, 2016 at 4:46 pm

    In more important news, I have the number 1 pick in my fantasy draft tonight, and I’m torn. QB’s make a huge difference in this PPR league – the difference between the top five QB’s and the rest can be substantial. But, taking a QB at 1 seems wrong and if I pick the wrong guy (i.e. Aaron Rodgers last year), will likely doom my season.

    The consensus number 1 is Antonio Brown and he’s perfect for my system.

    But….

  60. 60.

    SiubhanDuinne

    September 1, 2016 at 4:48 pm

    @OldDave:
    @Major Major Major Major:

    How often does one come across “antepenultimate” in song or verse? Flanders and Swann could tell you:

    Then there flashed through her mind what her mother had said
    With her antepenultimate breath
    “Oh my child, should you look on the wine that is red
    Be prepared for a fate worse than death”
    She let go her glass with a shrill little cry
    Crash! tinkle! it fell to the floor
    When he asked, “What in Heaven?” she made no reply
    Up her mind, and a dash for the door.

    The last (ultimate) verse of “Have Some Madeira, M’Dear”

  61. 61.

    redshirt

    September 1, 2016 at 4:48 pm

    @FlipYrWhig: I’ve seen zero Clinton signs in Boston and suburbs and about 10 Trump signs. Ergo Trump will win Mass.

  62. 62.

    Cacti

    September 1, 2016 at 4:51 pm

    Speaking of Florida…

    The SpaceX rocket that was set to carry the Facebook satellite into orbit, has exploded on the launch pad in Canaveral.

    Zuckerberg’s personal Sputnik was destroyed in the blast.

  63. 63.

    Major Major Major Major

    September 1, 2016 at 4:54 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: Cute.

    @Cacti: I saw that. Unfortunate.

  64. 64.

    SiubhanDuinne

    September 1, 2016 at 4:54 pm

    @Jeffro:

    Ok…so…how do I put a link into a thread without ending up in moderation?

    Highlight whatever words in your text you want to link.

    Go to the “link” button above the comment box.

    Paste or type in the URL of your link. NOTE: This is very important and I think a lot of people get in tangles because of it — the link box already has http:// entered, so you need to delete it before pasting in your own URL.

    That’s it.

  65. 65.

    SFAW

    September 1, 2016 at 4:55 pm

    Alligators are gushing out of storm drains

    Which leads to the extremely important question: how did they manage to get there from the sewers of NYC? I don’t think Amtrak has a fully-subterranean, reptiles-only Acela. Maybe the Gators built a Hyperloop without us knowing about it? And if so, how will the ‘Noles and the ‘Canes respond?

  66. 66.

    Patricia Kayden

    September 1, 2016 at 4:56 pm

    @Brachiator: Ryan Lochte?

  67. 67.

    raven

    September 1, 2016 at 4:56 pm

    @JPL: My bride is convinced we get nuttin!

  68. 68.

    SiubhanDuinne

    September 1, 2016 at 4:58 pm

    @Major Major Major Major:

    Cute.

    It is that. Here’s the entire song, with Michael Flanders singing and Donald Swann at the piano.

  69. 69.

    Patricia Kayden

    September 1, 2016 at 4:59 pm

    @redshirt: Betty asked us to avoid mentioning the Orange One. Y’all are so disobedient.

  70. 70.

    D58826

    September 1, 2016 at 4:59 pm

    Seems to me if the water is deep enough for the gator to swim it’s to deep to be driving in it.

  71. 71.

    Mary G

    September 1, 2016 at 5:00 pm

    @dmsilev: @Mnemosyne: @SiubhanDuinne: I have been reading it too! It is really well written, but this part from today’s installment got me:

    Duff was struck by how thoroughly the Irvine police had investigated a crime in which the victim had suffered no physical harm. They had put 20 detectives on the case against Kent and Jill Easter at one time or another, and the lead investigator had spent six months on it exclusively.

    Duff considered the possibilities. In so many places, he thought, it would have gone differently. If the attempted frame-up had happened in one of the gang neighborhoods of Los Angeles where he used to prosecute shootings, rather than in a rich, placid city in Orange County … if the cop who found the stash of drugs in Kelli Peters’ car had been a rookie, rather than a sharp-eyed veteran … if she had been slightly less believable …

    to quote rikyrah: uh huh

    Exhibit A for BLM

  72. 72.

    rikyrah

    September 1, 2016 at 5:02 pm

    Trump anti-immigrant speech follows dark pattern of US history
    Rachel Maddow shows how throughout American history, when normal politics breaks down, fringe voices gain prominence scapegoating immigrant groups.

  73. 73.

    D58826

    September 1, 2016 at 5:05 pm

    @Mike J: Not to worry Trump will deport all of the illegal gators/snakes on his first day in office. Those Burmese pythons better enjoy the Everglades while they have the chance. The Donald will get them.

  74. 74.

    Major Major Major Major

    September 1, 2016 at 5:09 pm

    @D58826: Burmese pythons are a model minority; they can stay.

  75. 75.

    Mike in NC

    September 1, 2016 at 5:10 pm

    We’re currently advised that rainfall starting Friday night could be in the range of 5 to 8 inches.

  76. 76.

    Iowa Old Lady

    September 1, 2016 at 5:11 pm

    @Mike in NC: Whoa. That’s a lot of water in a short time. Stay dry.

  77. 77.

    lollipopguild

    September 1, 2016 at 5:11 pm

    @CaseyL: No its the Teddy Bears Picinic!

  78. 78.

    Shell

    September 1, 2016 at 5:11 pm

    When you think Guilliani can’t embarrass himself any further in this campaign. Well……
    Today he sported a baseball cap saying “Make Mexico Great Again Also.” So, Trumps running for president of both countries now. And since when is Sarah Palin writing their copy?

  79. 79.

    bk

    September 1, 2016 at 5:21 pm

    @redshirt: My draft is tonight as well, and I pulled #8 (10-team league, serpentine). I am sure that Brown will be gone, but there are plenty of other top receivers that should be available in the first two rounds for me. I had Rodgers last year as well, and was disappointed to say the least.

  80. 80.

    redshirt

    September 1, 2016 at 5:27 pm

    @bk: Losing Jordy killed Green Bay last year. And he only just returned to practice. Wild card!

    I just read a convincing article the Arizona RB David Johnson should be the number one pick. I don’t know….

    Having the first pick is tough, since unless there is a truly standout player among his peers, number one is not that much better than say number 10; but you don’t get to pick again for a long time (in this league, I don’t pick again till 28). So many players will be gone by then.

    I’d almost rather have the 5th pick.

  81. 81.

    El Caganer

    September 1, 2016 at 5:29 pm

    Jeez, I move from Philly to Bradenton and walk right into the middle of this mess. Actually more worried about my friend on Siesta Key- she told me her yard is pretty much flooded already.

  82. 82.

    MattF

    September 1, 2016 at 5:29 pm

    Um… went to ‘Esquire politics’ to see what Charlie Pierce has to say… and got an error message. Is it just me?

  83. 83.

    CaseyL

    September 1, 2016 at 5:29 pm

    @lollipopguild: I know – I’ve loved that song since I was a little kid; I adapted it for the current fashion for bears to go swimming rather than picnicking.

  84. 84.

    El Caganer

    September 1, 2016 at 5:31 pm

    @Shell: I thought Sarah’s version was “Make Mexico Great Again Also Too. “

  85. 85.

    CaseyL

    September 1, 2016 at 5:31 pm

    @MattF: Huh. NBC news is off-line, too. Somewhere, an entire server farm has crashed.

  86. 86.

    bago

    September 1, 2016 at 5:32 pm

    @Cacti: I think both Zuckerberg and Musk can afford to be beta testers.

  87. 87.

    bago

    September 1, 2016 at 5:33 pm

    @Mike in NC: I guess I am buying an umbrella. This is my first Hurricane in Raleigh.

  88. 88.

    chopper

    September 1, 2016 at 5:34 pm

    I don’t understand everything she’s saying,

    well, it is Florida.

    but she did yield the right-of-way to the gator.

    sounds like a smart move.

  89. 89.

    hovercraft

    September 1, 2016 at 5:38 pm

    @Face:
    The most recent poll is from an outfit called Hampton University, which has her ahead 43 to 41, the same poll had them tied at 39 a month ago. All the other polls show her much further ahead, the RCP average is +10.8 points.

  90. 90.

    OldDave

    September 1, 2016 at 5:40 pm

    @Cacti:

    The SpaceX rocket … has exploded on the launch pad…

    The video of the mishap is rather spectacular.

  91. 91.

    MattF

    September 1, 2016 at 5:41 pm

    @MattF: Pierce is still around at Esquire, with this address.

  92. 92.

    Major Major Major Major

    September 1, 2016 at 5:44 pm

    @hovercraft: Keep Calm and Read Sam Wang

  93. 93.

    Schlemazel

    September 1, 2016 at 5:44 pm

    I am enjoying the Florida ‘sunshine’ falling form the sky every day down in the Keys. It is an interesting place but I can’t imagine anyone wanting to live here. A great place to visit . . . in January maybe.

    They have a very nice tour of the little White House that really makes Truman the center of attention and burnishes his reputation as a great President.

  94. 94.

    Robert Sneddon

    September 1, 2016 at 5:46 pm

    The northern parts of Japan have been hit hard by heavy rains from a recent typhoon. Nine residents of a retirement home which flooded were found dead after rescuers managed to reach it, two more bodies have been found elsewhere and three people are missing in Hokkaido after bridges collapsed from the effects of flooding.

    It’s not as bad as 2011 when about ninety people were killed in mudslides and flooding when two typhoons hit the southern part of the main island, Honshu.

  95. 95.

    Cat48

    September 1, 2016 at 5:46 pm

    Hillz announced she raised $143M in August. That will buy a few ads & organizers.

  96. 96.

    Mike J

    September 1, 2016 at 5:47 pm

    @OldDave: All that LOX not a bagel to be seen.

  97. 97.

    catclub

    September 1, 2016 at 5:48 pm

    @Roger Moore: Unless you are in New Orleans. Then all bets are off.
    Actually, you can bet that the pronunciation is wrong vis a vis Greek.

    Calliope
    Terpsichore

  98. 98.

    Jeffro

    September 1, 2016 at 5:49 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: Ok, testing, testing

    ETA it worked! Thanks for teaching this old dog a new trick, SD!

  99. 99.

    MattF

    September 1, 2016 at 5:50 pm

    @Mike J: Seriously, a liquid-fueled rocket?

  100. 100.

    catclub

    September 1, 2016 at 5:54 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    the link box already has http:// entered, so you need to delete it before pasting in your own URL.

    This probably varies for unknown reasons. At first I needed to delete the http:// from the box, but I no longer need to do so.
    Also, you might be making a link to an https:// location. Then you will need to edit the prefix.

    ETA: And I got moderated for all those http’s above. haha

  101. 101.

    D58826

    September 1, 2016 at 5:54 pm

    I can’t link it b/c on my iphone but the House is planning on holding hearings to determine if they can override the state AG investigations of Exxon-Mobile. They plan on calling three conservative legal scholars to explain why the small government/states rights party should suddenly be pulling rank on the states. I guess Lamar Alexander needed some extra cash in his re-election fund.

  102. 102.

    Mnemosyne

    September 1, 2016 at 5:58 pm

    @Mary G:

    The simple explanation is that cops get pissed off when civilians lie to them. If only they got as pissed when their fellow cops lie to them.

  103. 103.

    debbie

    September 1, 2016 at 6:01 pm

    Okay, I won’t say his name, but can you please ask Hermine to scatter the T-name to the four winds?

  104. 104.

    dmsilev

    September 1, 2016 at 6:06 pm

    @Cat48:

    Hillz announced she raised $143M in August. That will buy a few ads & organizers.

    Or it could buy a cheapo hat for roughly half the population of the US! Priorities, people, priorities.

  105. 105.

    Jeffro

    September 1, 2016 at 6:08 pm

    @D58826: Here’s a link to the story, with the amusing headline, “Republicans investigate their ability to investigate investigations”

    Basically, big Dem states are learning how to do some of the work that the GOP-controlled House won’t let happen at the federal level…i.e., pursue climate change-obscuring PR campaigns (as noted in the above article). I think CA is looking into gun-control research as well (currently forbidden at the federal level by GOP wackaloons)

  106. 106.

    SiubhanDuinne

    September 1, 2016 at 6:11 pm

    @Jeffro:

    ETA it worked! Thanks for teaching this old dog a new trick, SD!

    I’m very glad, Jeffro! It’s rare that I am capable of teaching anyone anything to do with tech or computer skills, so this is a win for both of us!

  107. 107.

    Trollhattan

    September 1, 2016 at 6:14 pm

    @Jeffro:
    Yes sir. Behold: California’s biggest Fuck You to the NRA, to date.

  108. 108.

    OldDave

    September 1, 2016 at 6:15 pm

    @Mike J:

    All that LOX

    LOL. No end of bagels in South Florida. Titusville? Not so sure.

  109. 109.

    hovercraft

    September 1, 2016 at 6:16 pm

    @Major Major Major Major:
    I’m calm, I was trying to calm @Face.

  110. 110.

    MattF

    September 1, 2016 at 6:16 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: I do wonder why that http prefix is in the ‘link’ by default– I suppose the initial idea was to type the URL in by hand, but then URLs became complicated– so everyone just started cutting, copying, and pasting. And now everyone has the habit of deleting the prefix, so there’s no point to changing the default.

  111. 111.

    OldDave

    September 1, 2016 at 6:18 pm

    @MattF: I’m confused. Most to-orbit rockets are liquid fuel based – the specific impulse of liquid fueled engines is considerably higher than with solids.

  112. 112.

    SiubhanDuinne

    September 1, 2016 at 6:19 pm

    @MattF:

    Yes, to the extent I’ve tried to figure out the “why” of it, that’s pretty much what I came up with. I suppose Alain could tell us, but honestly, at this point it’s so rote I don’t even care.

  113. 113.

    Major Major Major Major

    September 1, 2016 at 6:20 pm

    @hovercraft: calmer than you are.

  114. 114.

    eclare

    September 1, 2016 at 6:26 pm

    Found out today my dog has several tumors in his stomach. Putting him to sleep tomorrow. It’s the right thing, but it’s hard.

  115. 115.

    MattF

    September 1, 2016 at 6:27 pm

    @OldDave: Well, I looked it up and the Falcon 9 does indeed carry liquid oxygen, despite being restartable. Live and learn.

  116. 116.

    JPL

    September 1, 2016 at 6:28 pm

    @eclare: I’m so sorry. hugs

  117. 117.

    eclare

    September 1, 2016 at 6:29 pm

    @JPL: Thank you.

  118. 118.

    Mnemosyne

    September 1, 2016 at 6:29 pm

    @eclare:

    Oh, no! I’m so sorry. It’s hard to do even when you know it’s the right thing and you’ll be sparing your pet enormous pain down the line.

  119. 119.

    eclare

    September 1, 2016 at 6:32 pm

    @Mnemosyne:He hasn’t been himself for a while, but he stopped eating two days ago. Took him in today. Got some pain shots for tonight.

  120. 120.

    DCrefugee

    September 1, 2016 at 6:32 pm

    @El Caganer: Welcome! Just gotta get to the high ground. Oh, wait…

  121. 121.

    hovercraft

    September 1, 2016 at 6:32 pm

    @Major Major Major Major:
    Ha !

  122. 122.

    Chris

    September 1, 2016 at 6:32 pm

    @Roger Moore: Any excuse to write antepenultimate!

  123. 123.

    raven

    September 1, 2016 at 6:33 pm

    @eclare: Aw, it’s the second best thing we can do for our pets and it sucks.

  124. 124.

    HRA

    September 1, 2016 at 6:33 pm

    Stay safe Betty and family plus anyone else within the path of the storm!

  125. 125.

    hovercraft

    September 1, 2016 at 6:33 pm

    @eclare:
    So sorry. Keep him close for the time you have left.

  126. 126.

    CaseyL

    September 1, 2016 at 6:34 pm

    @eclare: I’m so, so sorry. It’s great they gave you pain meds to give him a pain-free last day. Hugs and condolences.

  127. 127.

    Mike J

    September 1, 2016 at 6:35 pm

    @MattF:

    Well, I looked it up and the Falcon 9 does indeed carry liquid oxygen, despite being restartable

    Fire started in the lox tank during fueling.

  128. 128.

    lamh36

    September 1, 2016 at 6:35 pm

    Well…well…

    @costareports
    NEWS: Trump reveals in phone call w/ @washingtonpost that he has hired DAVID BOSSIE as deputy campaign manager

  129. 129.

    seaboogie

    September 1, 2016 at 6:36 pm

    @Brachiator: Go Bears! *fist pump*

    On the left coast, we have bears that swim with hoomans….

    Also – 3 bears….guessing there was a blonde around there somewhere….

  130. 130.

    Kathleen O'Neill

    September 1, 2016 at 6:37 pm

    @eclare: I am so sorry. Hugs from me as well.

  131. 131.

    ruckus

    September 1, 2016 at 6:37 pm

    @eclare:
    Sorry about your friend/pet.
    Always a tough decision but sometimes it’s the only one.

  132. 132.

    eclare

    September 1, 2016 at 6:38 pm

    @raven: Yes, it does, but he is not the same Dante that he was just a few months ago. Fuck cancer! Thankfully I have another dog here.

  133. 133.

    Origuy

    September 1, 2016 at 6:38 pm

    I drove across California’s Central Valley last weekend from Los Banos to Madera on my way to the Sierra Nevada. I saw the usual signs blaming Nancy Pelosi and Jim Costa (D-Fresno) for the drought, with the addition of T****/Pence signs. A little further on I saw one Hillary lawn sign and a few doors down a handmade Ron Paul 2012 sign still up. Draw what conclusions you will from that.

    EDIT. Sorry forgot it was a safe place.

  134. 134.

    MomSense

    September 1, 2016 at 6:39 pm

    @eclare:

    Damn, eclare. I’m really sorry. It had been almost two years since I lost my sweet pup (he was 15) and I still miss his salty, old face. Sending you a big hug.

  135. 135.

    raven

    September 1, 2016 at 6:39 pm

    @eclare: Our guys are both getting up there so we just try to enjoy every day.

  136. 136.

    Mnemosyne

    September 1, 2016 at 6:40 pm

    @lamh36:

    Well, that will be … interesting. I guess not enough white women hated Trump yet.

  137. 137.

    Botsplainer

    September 1, 2016 at 6:40 pm

    So I’m sitting in a decent little Asian restaurant waiting for my wife, listening to an aging white wingnut yammer on in a droning tone about Obama and socialized medicine. His wife sits silently while he talks at her.

    Debating whether I want to stab him with a fork or whether I want to shatter my beer glass and use the shards to shred his esophagus.

    They’re at the next booth.

  138. 138.

    Major Major Major Major

    September 1, 2016 at 6:40 pm

    @eclare: So sorry to hear that :(

  139. 139.

    eclare

    September 1, 2016 at 6:41 pm

    @MomSense: Thank you! They all help! Dante was about 10 or 11. He is not happy, it’s the right thing to do.

  140. 140.

    cat copeland

    September 1, 2016 at 6:45 pm

    @Brachiator:
    Yes, alligators in fla., & bears in LA. See, that was THEIR habitat first.

    It’s raining men….UHM………….”.Alligators”

  141. 141.

    redshirt

    September 1, 2016 at 6:45 pm

    @Botsplainer: Chopsticks in the eyeballs.

  142. 142.

    cat copeland

    September 1, 2016 at 6:46 pm

    @eclare:
    DAMN, DAMN & DOUBLE DAMN!!

  143. 143.

    Gravenstone

    September 1, 2016 at 6:48 pm

    @Botsplainer: If it’s an Asian joint, pith him with a chopstick.

  144. 144.

    scav

    September 1, 2016 at 6:48 pm

    @Botsplainer: “The Empress of China, she laughs when I laugh! … I stare at my fork. The empress would grab it And stand up and stab it In his neck” They’re eating chop suey.

  145. 145.

    Botsplainer

    September 1, 2016 at 6:49 pm

    @redshirt:

    He’s pushing 70, is as broad as he is tall, and is lamenting for the revenues of his friends who are well known local sports doctors whose practices command an easy 7 figure annual net. They’ve apparently whined to him about revenues being “down”.

  146. 146.

    seaboogie

    September 1, 2016 at 6:49 pm

    @eclare: It is such a kindness that we can offer to our canine and feline companions – please do remember this. And I send you compassionate love and understanding….

  147. 147.

    eric

    September 1, 2016 at 6:50 pm

    @eclare: so so sorry. hug all night

  148. 148.

    MomSense

    September 1, 2016 at 6:51 pm

    @eclare:

    It’s the right thing to do but it still hurts. On my dog’s last night he couldn’t climb the stairs so my son carried him up the stairs so he could sleep with him as usual. And the next day he carried him down the stairs and to the car. I couldn’t help but think about how it had all come full circle. When he first brought him home as a puppy he couldn’t manage the stairs so we had to carry him up and down. Pretty soon he was tearing all around at full speed with his boys. It goes so quickly and it is devastating to lose them but what can we do?! It’s a beautiful love.

  149. 149.

    raven

    September 1, 2016 at 6:52 pm

    We who choose to surround ourselves
    with lives even more temporary than our
    own, live within a fragile circle;
    easily and often breached.
    Unable to accept its awful gaps,
    we would still live no other way.
    We cherish memory as the only
    certain immortality, never fully
    understanding the necessary plan.
    — Irving Townsend

  150. 150.

    seaboogie

    September 1, 2016 at 6:53 pm

    @Botsplainer: We rescue pets here, but making your bail might be possible – after endless threads of discussion.

  151. 151.

    redshirt

    September 1, 2016 at 6:56 pm

    @Botsplainer: Oh. Chopsticks up the nostrils then.

  152. 152.

    seaboogie

    September 1, 2016 at 6:56 pm

    @raven: Wiping away a tear – thank you. And we’ll always have Walter. Even when his days are done, we will have a collective memory of Walter, thanks to Cole and debit – and Walter.

  153. 153.

    grandpa john

    September 1, 2016 at 6:59 pm

    @hovercraft:Which should reinforce the point made often by Sam and and 538 to wit A single poll, taken alone is worthless in making any predictions,

  154. 154.

    Chris T.

    September 1, 2016 at 7:01 pm

    @OldDave: Right: Ultimate = final, and then the prefixes move it back: pen-ultimate = one before end, ante-pen-ultimate = 2 before. There’s also pre-ante-pen-ultimate = 3 before end.

    In music, a “quaver” is an eighth note, and this can be prefixed with demi- to make it a 16th, semi-demi to make it a 32nd, or hemi-demi-semi to make it a 64th note.

    Hence: “the preantepenultimate tone is a hemidemisemiquaver” :-)

  155. 155.

    Botsplainer

    September 1, 2016 at 7:03 pm

    @seaboogie:

    The thread would be epic.

  156. 156.

    Botsplainer

    September 1, 2016 at 7:04 pm

    @redshirt:

    Sadly, there is no Bolton-esque mustache.

  157. 157.

    grandpa john

    September 1, 2016 at 7:05 pm

    @Major Major Major Major: I would suggest that they not only read him but also take what they read as something to heed

    I wou

  158. 158.

    Chris T.

    September 1, 2016 at 7:05 pm

    @Trollhattan: Dammit, I’m always late to these things!

  159. 159.

    Trollhattan

    September 1, 2016 at 7:06 pm

    @eclare:
    So very sorry!

  160. 160.

    dexwood

    September 1, 2016 at 7:25 pm

    @eclare:

    I wish you strength and peace.

  161. 161.

    grandpa john

    September 1, 2016 at 7:29 pm

    @Botsplainer: Like the now departed friend of mine who constantly bitched about “Socialized Medicine” all during the trips when I drove him to the VA hospital for appointments.

  162. 162.

    bemused

    September 1, 2016 at 7:35 pm

    @Botsplainer:

    I wonder if she is another woman who secretly votes for the other team.

  163. 163.

    Betty Cracker

    September 1, 2016 at 7:49 pm

    @eclare: Damn, that sucks. I’m sorry. ?

  164. 164.

    1,000 Flouncing Lurkers (was fidelioscabinet)

    September 1, 2016 at 8:22 pm

    @eclare: I’m so sorry.

  165. 165.

    eclare

    September 1, 2016 at 9:36 pm

    Thank you all so much, it really does help. He is asleep on my bed right now, I lifted him up, he could not climb the pet step. Tomorrow will be hard, but he is not the same dog. He is not even a version of the dog. He is very sick. Fuck cancer.

  166. 166.

    tybee

    September 1, 2016 at 9:49 pm

    1st band is here. gonna be an interesting day tomorrow. have limes, rum, club soda, mint and simple syrup. \

    at least we won’t come down with scurvy.

  167. 167.

    seaboogie

    September 1, 2016 at 11:59 pm

    @eclare: Our canine companions spend a lifetime of energy loving us and enjoying the world – they are very pure in that way. When we self-lessly ease their suffering and passing – as hard as it hurts us – it is our way to repay their love and devotion – with comfort at the end.

  168. 168.

    Jaws

    September 2, 2016 at 9:39 am

    @Roger Moore:
    “That’s actually “her-MY-o-nee”; being a Greek name, the emphasis is on the antepenultimate syllable.”

    That’s actually the douchiest reply ever.

  169. 169.

    Richard Mayhew

    September 2, 2016 at 9:42 am

    @Jaws: Have you been here for a while?

    That barely cracks the top 5% of douchiest comments :)

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